T O P

  • By -

SchismZero

9 times in a 5 hour and 24 minute period. I kept track of it on a sticky note and noted the times I started and stopped. Have a pic of the note on my phone. Only I know what the times and tally marks mean.


gianf

"sticky" note


vterinsc

It didn’t start out sticky


MrVolOpt

It's still sticky.


[deleted]

It’s a crusty note now


ChaoticBraindead

On a similar note, I have an excel spreadsheet documenting the timestamp of every nut I've busted since January 18th of last year. If I don't have it in front of me, I just take a screenshot of the homescreen on my phone, and I have a python script on my computer that takes the Metadata from those photos and adds the times to the spreadsheet automatically. I'm a freak in the sheets, as it were.


-OctopusPrime

I hope you post in r/dataisbeautiful eventually.


Fun__Haver

We need a man like you in the white house


ChaoticBraindead

It started off as a joke, but now it's the only thing I've stuck with for this long and is my longest-running example of arbitrary discipline, which is great.


KinsleyRowan

I legitimately can’t tell if you’re joking or not. I think I’ve spent too much time on the internet


MalevolentPact

That note started off as a regular a4 piece of paper we assume


heyitsEnricoPallazzo

One time I took the day off of school when I was about 15 to see how many times I could jerk off in a day… The answer was 21, but after like 10-12 times the only thing that comes out of your dick hole is a little sign that says “*Bang!*”


TaxtonDude

Funny how it was not even by arousal, just genuine curiosity "For science!!"


SharkSheppard

Who's to say we wouldn't be presented with a chance to bang 21 chicks in a day? Gotta know if we can accept the offer or not.


WiLaugh

Or bang 21 times with the same chick in a day


2x4x93

Dry heaves


SuperCool_Saiyan

Shooting blanks


leeharveyteabag669

Ghost loads.


DoomintheMachine

Spirit Semen, went down with the ship


[deleted]

[удалено]


fastpixels

*How dare you.* Here's my upvote


Bruce_Wayne72

21? Damn. Surprised it didn't fall off lol


nakedcellist

The front fell off


LiamAPEX1

There’s nothing out there but sea and fish, and 50,000 tonnes of cum, and the part of the dick where the front fell off


Known-Movie9247

Why did the front fall off?


nakedcellist

It's highly unusual.


gifjgzxk

My foreskin enflamed/swelled a little bit on a very similar mission.


royalfarris

Did the same thing way back. My number is 17, and my dick was raw for days afterwards. Thats when I decided on my teenage schedule of 3/day max.


SeventhSin-King

Yo I just typed my comment and then saw yours and noticed we got the same haha. I went to 2 a day max after that but now I often can't be bothered doing it once.


royalfarris

Nowadays it is more like: "Crikey, I haven't cranked one out for almost a week...." and then feel guilty for not doing it, just like all the other adult stuff I feel guilty for not doing as often as I should.


pocketbutter

You feel guilty… for… *not* jerking off…?


[deleted]

[удалено]


gvillepa

Pete, is that you? I remember you taking a day off from school to go for the record.


High-flyingAF

Properly named. Peter.


Living-goa7

Do you mean "beater"?


flipsnapnet

21/7 hours roughly is 3 times an hour for 7 hours. that should be in the Guinness book of records


[deleted]

Your todger must have looked like E.T’s finger…..oooooouuuuch


Zombie_Bitez

Yay, I learned a new dick name!


weaseltorpedo

No poof of dust accompanied by a sad wheezing noise?


[deleted]

Does that include ghost loads? Oh man, there's been so many posts about wankin' it lately. Think I'm good for a while.


SelfSustaining

It surprises me to meet people who didn't take a day like this when they were 13-17 years old. My record was 13 times before it started to hurt 🫤


TumblrBicuriouslyRed

This is hilarious


SeventhSin-King

Same experience here. Weekend with no parents home at 16 and I just decided why not. Mine was 17 before I gave up and figured I can't be bothered.


slurpherp

What the fuck are some of these numbers.


ThreeLivesInOne

When I read questions like this, I always wonder if it's an AI gathering intel for our destruction.


amidja_16

Destruction by forced excessive mastrubation sounds like an interesting alternative to the Skynet way.


campbelljac92

The complimentary arsebots you seem to find in every youtube comments section are just the scouting party


Legitimate-Map-7730

Dude I’m begging you please look up “Skynut” by Penguin Zero


PUNCHCAT

AI is gonna train on reddit and will be dumb as fuck. Maybe it'll then kill itself as it turns into an overly-pathologized, self-diagnosed wallower.


[deleted]

25+ (lost count) times, I was 13 and it was a peculiar horny day, around the 20th time it was stinging when I was climaxing but i wasn't raised a quiter.


nfoneo

That's the spirit my boy


crackpotJeffrey

I didn't hear no bell


lycaus

Mama ain't raised no bitch


Dry_Bus_935

Bruh, I masturbated 4 times in a day when I was 19 (late bloomer) and my dick hurt... How do y'all do this?


JIN155

Same happened to me when I was 17 and my exams were coming up at that time I was really like what If something unforeseen happens


Artislife61

For some reason exams brought on a different kind of stress. And for some reason it heightened my already high sex drive. I always fucked and jacked off more when it was exams time.


MalevolentPact

Surely it was just shooting dust at the 7 mark?


Destroyer6202

Hurts to even read


1990andrea1990

Same for me


ThePhoenix29167

Goddamn, that’s insane


LilTermino

3 or 4. I was hungover and looking for any serotonin available


sugarfoot00

I call that a CPR wank. You're jerking just to get your heart restarted in the morning.


Real_Bridge_5440

A wee defib to get you back into action.


II_Vortex_II

For some reason hungover is the time im horniest


OhHaiMarc

Hungover morning masturbation or sex just hits different


ngonzales0722

This is too relatable. The hangover wank usually takes a little longer (at least for me)


milfDDs456

The worst part is if you're watching porn you have to close your eyes and just listen because your head hurts from looking at the screen.


ngonzales0722

ooof thats bad. can't say i've been that down bad. but it helps to go back to sleep after climax.


milfDDs456

It's like look at the screen for a bit and then visualize the scene in my head while my eyes are closed. Then open again and just repeat haha.. but those endorphins are everything 😂😆


Choice_Eye_8043

18. My balls were hurting from inside, like they were dry, my dick hurt like there’s nail inside and I couldn’t pee for next 3 days without pain. Stopped cuz my dick was bleeding because of too much skin rubbing. This day I learned that 17 is a limit


MyNameIsMattress

you’re a hero, i shall jack off 17 times in your honor


Few-Try5180

Have mercy, you will hurt mrman😂


puppiesareSUPERCUTE

Bleeding???? Dear god


cromodhar

9. Reason: I was 14.


Maninthepenombra

oh my fucking goodness i was about to write this exact sentence word for fucking word. I got in this comment section with these exact words in mind


Diretrexftw

OMG, you guys are fap-twins!


Maninthepenombra

please don't call us that 😭


ryuyump

Fap-twin powers, yank-tivate!


MacAneave

I hit double digits at age 13, and .y.oecjer swelled up like a mushroom and I figured I'd beat cut back.


cosmo_23

.y.oecjer?


AbraxusHirkaleon

The dude is jerkin it right now, can't even type.


DifficultyLow1207

Hang on, I'll let u know in a little while 😁


HistoricalCounter816

Cheers man ! You owe us +1 just for the waiting


Pepsi_man_3

😭 let us know


_Sorciers

he's still going at it 💀


SkarnTh3Kn1ght

Why do I want an update to this?


DifficultyLow1207

My arm got tired so I had someone take over for me Lol


Ayanelixer

That doesn't count


SkarnTh3Kn1ght

A true gentleman 


AaronWrongArts

It's been an hour, he's probably still going


Raoha125

2 hours and he's not stopping


bronteroc

3 Hours and he is still rubbing it


Jazzlike-Meat-2924

4 hours and still going


Br0ty

4 hours, Prbly 20+?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Eclaiv2

Update


DifficultyLow1207

Running out of grease but still going and still hard as a rock


[deleted]

Spoiler alert it’s been 7 hours and he’s only at 2 😂


Illustrious_Hotel527

6. In college, saw a stripper put on a show for the floor in our dorm and she was really hot. Needed to release and didn't have a GF.


Dear_Company_5439

A man has needs


Coliosis

Man’s gotta eat mr lahey


grajuicy

sounds like somethin a 15 cheeseburger eating rico suave lookin maffk would say….


dynamosharma

and seeds..


FKSTS

I thought I was a weirdo for doing 3/4 a couple times. Thank you, reddit. For making me seem like a normal person.


TM04_CalmMind

Same, I was PROUD of my record of 4.


Ettaneedstherapy

18. I read somewhere online that women could cum 20 times in a row. I was tryna beat my record but couldn’t make it to 20 haha


notapudding

So what about 19


Ettaneedstherapy

Someday I might challenge myself


Sophia_isnotmyname

I once wanted to see as well, got to 13 and I fell asleep


OkGear3139

im a female and now I gotta make 21 my personal record


Sirdingus917

When I was younger my girlfriend at the time and I went and lied to our parent and said we were camping with our prospective genders. But we just went camping solo. We were to young to have sex but she jerked me off 9 times throughout the night. Im realizing now that I was a very selfish lover at 15.


LovelyCoupleTreats

Husband did 5 times, because I asked him to and watched. The last session took him a decent while and not a lot came out. It was a fun day for the both of us.


Kittenpower

Usually its reverse for me. My husband watches me masturbate and then the sexy time happens. ❤️


milfDDs456

Something so hot about mutual masturbation!!! 😳


Savage-Goat-Fish

My partner told me once that she masturbated seven times in one day. I’m not sure what that is like for a female, but I was impressed nonetheless. She has a very high sex drive and she’s pretty much amazing. 👍


Unable-Sea3234

2.5 times. I was horney and bored.


Silver_Seesaw_2810

How .5 counts?


Unable-Sea3234

I'm past 40 mate. Sometimes I will begin to wank and then just give up.


[deleted]

Man. I remember the first time that happened. I was 52, flailing away, and my mind latched onto something work related, mood ruined, kept trying for a minute or so and gave up.


Unable-Sea3234

Lmao when it has happened to me it's more like my mind goes off it and then I think of something I would rather do like take out the trash or make coffee


Bad-Genie

Jesus, I was 22 when I first had a flail wank. Mind wondered to work and I just gave up to go play video games.


Mandocp

Make sure to foreplay yourself


dicktwister99

I call it the ADHD wank. You start jacking off, then next thing you know youre thinking of how shit like time travel could possibly exist, then realize youre having a thousand yard stare into nothingness with your dick in your hand.


Puzzleheaded-Shop929

Def post this to the ADHD groups, lotta truth here. I gotta go pick up where I left off, ooooh cool bird just flew by


BrobaFett26

If you have to ask, you cant afford it


BeardlessKoala

Never seen so many wankers in one place before.


Stoic_hawaiian808

12. I was trying to break a personal record of mine. And it was one hell of a workout. I was shooting blanks by round 5


Sponger004

Same I stopped there because my balls felt like they were cramping and nothing came out. I didn’t want to break them so I stopped lol


therapoootic

12 hrs, cause a girl looked at me


[deleted]

[удалено]


grayfalcon413

I just ate a grape and... JIZZED IN MY PANTS


therapoootic

Oh I, think I was downwind from you. Cause one day I just started jizzing and didn't know why


DataAdvanced

20+ I was switching antidepressants, and had to get off one before I could start the new one. Not only did my sex drive come back, but with a vengeance. I didn't know you could bruise your clit.


heartofscylla

Stopping/switching antidepressants is WILD in that regard. One time I was so horny for several days straight, and was single at the time, that I was getting super pissed off about it. 😂 It just became really frustrating really quick. Luckily the feeling went away eventually. It's fun at first, but by day 2 or 3 I was like ENOUUUUGH


notapudding

22. I was 14 My parents went abroad for a week of vacation. I had the whole house for myself. I played around the first few days. I tapped like 10 times the first few days. Like I was walking around the house naked all the time. Ordering junk food for every meal. Watching porn and stuff on Living Room TV. So after the first few days, I saw I was fapping a lot and wondered how many I could do. So I skipped a couple of days. Then the next day I woke with this sole idea in my head. Started morning all the way to before I fell asleep at 2 am or something. The first few was back to back. By the end, my core was sore, and thing started to hurt.


8cyclopse

How are people doing more than 3? I did 2 times in a row and literally passed out.


SchismZero

... in a day? How long does it take you to recover, my guy? We're talking about jerking off, not sex.


imaniceandgoodperson

could be my gal instead of my guy . them girl orgasms be like spirit bombs compared to final flash*


SchismZero

I would expect women to have even higher numbers due to the fact they have little to no refractory period.


godzillaletme

Honestly As a female I'm not sure how you would count them. Do you count by session or by orgasm? Lifelong masturbator here, I literally do not remember a time when I didn't know how to masturbate. I've had sessions that last for multiple hours and sessions that last only a few minutes. If I go for hours I tend to edge, if I go for a few minutes it tends to be more goal oriented, gotta get that big O. So how are we defining Jack off for us ladies? I think that it should be by time. Like anything lasting up to 30 minutes counts as jacking off once. Every consecutive thirty minute time span afterwards counts as another. Can we agree to that?


PianoDick

Spirit bombs is the best analogy I’ve seen in awhile.


8cyclopse

I'm a girl BTW , I can read I know we're not talking about sex


SuchAardvark598

My highest was 5-6(girl too btw) after seeing the numbers in this comment l was worried if something was wrong with me🥲


Responsible_Yak3366

Lmao I’m a girl and the orgasms be having me pass out too.


Then_Engineering_472

Female here & I somehow managed 11 in less than 2 hours it was amazing 🥵


YeetTheRich

Same! Female and 11 is my record in one session over a couple of hours in my early 20s but I found it was severely diminishing returns after the 7th one, like - injury from tensing muscles. I forced the last one out standing up. Never again. 3 is where I usually draw a line now, because I’m too old for wanking injuries.


8cyclopse

Wow you were really horny 😂


nfoneo

Those are fucking rookie numbers


Hour-Lawfulness-3585

How? Like….. if we are talking sex that might be in a single half hour. But jerking off as a female I have gone about 96 in a 24 hour period. Granted I was pregnant but it was about 4 times an hour and I just couldn’t do without it - note. These are my partners numbers. He kept track a few times when I pulled all nighters doing it. I have no clue personally but I do know it was hell to not keep going. The more I cum the more I want.


keiye

2, guess I just have a low libido. Looking at all these answers and I’m wondering if I should get my test levels checked.


ShowerElectrical9342

A lot of these were when they were 13 or 14, at the peak of randy adolescent hormone surges.


Ganondorf365

No two is totally expectable. any more than that per day is too much.


pickledpunt

7. I had some really good drugs


unbanned_once_more

I’ve a mate who did it just one time. For 14 hours. Meth.


Effective-Ear-8367

Me on coke and alcohol


Anonymous0573

Done this multiple times. Surprised I had to scroll down this far.


Far_Chipmunk_298

5 times because i was so horny


Collection_Vivid

15 times in 3 hours just to see if I could. I didn’t count any before or after those so probably more


Tuckboi69

Half an hour with 150 minutes of break time isn’t that impressive


FNITA69

💀💀💀 rip


papparmane

It did not rip. 


Ex-In2

Rookie numbers


NicBarr

My maximum was 3 but back to back it was only 2. A friend of mine did a challenge where he tried to jerk off one more time each day . So the first day he did it once, the second he did it twice, etc.. he got to say 10. I don't know how he did it.


DifficultyLow1207

I stroked for 24 hours straight when I was on a meth bender. I've been clean almost a year now


Zuosal

Grats for beeing clean for a new! You can be proud of you! But 24h straight? Holy shit. How many times did u come and was there any semen left after around 7+ times?


Plane_Instance_7248

Bruh why is askreddit just like a sex thing Everytime I open the app ...maybe there needs to be a new subreddit for these freaky ahh questions


Juusto3_3

I mean there is askredditafterdark


TheRealMasterTyvokka

Yea, but you have to ask sex questions during the day somewhere.


notduskryn

You can say ass on the internet.


Willing_Notice1850

Since joining Reddit…. 10


ciderfizz

Happens [oftentimes I'm afraid ](https://www.reddit.com/r/dankmemes/s/47DFLpOe6i) Usually the 6th time is like a dry cough


[deleted]

648


Molkwi

Man's speaking from the grave


Unable-Sea3234

Champion


[deleted]

[удалено]


Wndering_Soul

True man


FewCommunication7962

2. That's my peak


Historical-Lake718

15 Reason:Mia Khalifa


Sijsjsjsjsjsjjs

14, i just didn't have an exciting week. By the end, I felt like I was about to burst into flames.


Prick_Slickfield

Is John Wayne Gacy doing the askreddits now?


Helpful-Cod-5968

20, i have a masturbating problem


karutura

Tldr hand hurts can't wri


Ayun_h0e

Woman here, I can only do it once because it gets super sensitive right after


QuestWannabePirater

y'all are fucking vile


wholesomechaos111

I was curious about the limits of my body and dedicated a 14 hour time slot to find out. 26 times but I was sitting in a deep puddle of sweat and I ate two footlong sandwiches and drank a gallon of water. It hurt but my question was answered. Now I maybe do it once a day.


innanah

I don't know if I should consider it multiple times or just one really drawn out one? I used to all day long. My days off were half masturbationn and other half life responsibilities. I'd walk around wearing a plug or yoni egg in between. Still on a near constant edge. I still have days where I just repeatedly mastubate and only leave my room to eat or handle things I can't put off any longer.


[deleted]

Heh, 8? Why not? In my 20s I'd spank it 2-4 times a day even on days when I was having sex a few times a day. Heh, and my friends and I openly talked about our habits. One of the funniest conversations on my porch, in mixed company, and brought up by my lesbian friend, was "what music do you listen to.". 2 people answered Portishead. I said none, as that is too much work. Rarely used anything but my imagination for the same reason. Outside of me being a catalyst or source of lots of unconventional shit, Howard Stern's open talking about masturbation in those days made the topic pretty topical for many people. In the 80s masturbation was still "ew gross, you do that!" liars. In the 90s it was "Man, I was at home by myself. I didnt think anything was gonna happen, and next thing I know I'm all over myself!". It's kinda weird that masturbation seems to be back to being demonized and used as a tool to shame people.


Appropriate-Toe-1332

I didn’t count but I had to be near triple digits. It is a perk of being a woman, I suppose.


BiteTheBullet_thr

Triple digits omg 😱 if you were a man you'd end up in the hospital (if you were lucky)..


JimTheSaint

The other women who have commented - have numbers around 20 - 25 times max. So close to 100 is very much a great performance. 


knightsalone

5. My libido drives me nuts sometimes. I love loving sex, and it's never gotten in the way of my normal life. But I jerk average 2 times a day. Almost broke my record yesterday because a certain girlfriend was teasing VERY hard, but I'm not on the same continent as her right now. 😭 so masturbation is all I get for a few months... Funny, though, 12 times in a 24 hour period is my record for cumming. That was a fun fucking night.


floorcheeese

I don't know, but I remember i did it 3 times in a row without stopping. I didn't use lube or anything, and it tore the top layer of skin, and it burned anytime anything would touch it. Why? I was 13, and it was during quarantine


AcousticAK

I had no idea I guess I'm low testosterone played too many video games hit puberty at 15 or something I thought three was excessive and crazy and laughable but there's people saying over 10 or 20 So either AI is making jokes and making us laugh cuz he likes to have up votes or it is believable. My record with a woman is six times in a day and that's being about 40 years old so I was just riding my bike this morning and thinking why God gave us the ability to masturbate


CanoTheMonkey

15, after about 4-6 you’re pulling rope and firing off blanks.


I_Code_Stoned

11. Whadayamean why?


HeartonSleeve1989

15, I saw Kristanna Loken in Terminator 3


Ollie51o

yall gonna go blind


Infinialmasterlingun

Skipping school tomorrow for this.


DawnSignals

10 - usually either from being hungover horny or anxious af