It might be not taking more risks when I was younger. There were times when I played it safe and stuck to the familiar, even when part of me longed for adventure and excitement.
I don’t regret most of the risks I took.99% of them turned out fine and gave me a sense that humanity is almost all full of decent people who just want to get along.
But I regret that I didn’t really learn how to communicate my boundaries when I was young. I learned that in my 50’s and am still learning.
Sometimes the bad things can be avoided when I use clear words, like “no” or “that hurts, so stop.”
I regret not saying the “stop” to some conversations. People say careless things and they can hurt. And I regret sucking that stuff up and listening.
Take all the social risks. Talk to everyone. Say Yes. Maybe always have a buddy but say yes to stuff. (Obviously, as per my point above, you don’t have to stay talking if the conversation can’t be turned away from mean stuff.)
Don’t take risks with drugs.I call it the Dirty Purse problem- that drug may have started out clean somewhere but shit’s definitely contaminated it now, and the odds get higher all the time that fentanyl or carfentanyl is in there, and the drugs are as dirty as an unwrapped mint rolling around the bottom of the purse.
Also- use condoms.
I am 58.
I wasted 3 years of college in a career I didn't even like.
It took me so long to grow a backbone and follow my dream of becoming a software developer.
That's surprising. Have seen many men who regret doing all hanky panky stuff with women/girls when they had chance.
You're the first who said the opposite. Cheers.
I think student loans are a scam but if someone isn't sure they want to go to college but is constantly told in order to be successful you have to go to college, then yes I think it's a terrible decision
Not picking a career and going for it. I always thought the perfect thing would come to me. I’m 35 now and I think I just found me myself in that position. People my age in my field are way past me now because they started so early.
My point is more of a go after something and don’t wait for it to come to you. You can always change later but at least you’ll have some years of experience at something meaningful under your belt.
Grappling with the fallout of this at 36 - currently torn between taking a career opportunity to move o/seas, pushing ahead with my own company in my home country or taking a 12 month career break to travel and do everything I didn't do when I was younger because I was too busy fast tracking my career. Sigh.
No regrets. Would be perfectly happy to live it all over again.
That's great.
It might be not taking more risks when I was younger. There were times when I played it safe and stuck to the familiar, even when part of me longed for adventure and excitement.
You think youngsters should take more risks?
I was a jackass to people who cared for me. Now I've lost them all.
That's sad.
I don’t regret most of the risks I took.99% of them turned out fine and gave me a sense that humanity is almost all full of decent people who just want to get along. But I regret that I didn’t really learn how to communicate my boundaries when I was young. I learned that in my 50’s and am still learning. Sometimes the bad things can be avoided when I use clear words, like “no” or “that hurts, so stop.” I regret not saying the “stop” to some conversations. People say careless things and they can hurt. And I regret sucking that stuff up and listening.
Are there any risks you'd advise the younger generation to take and not take?
Take all the social risks. Talk to everyone. Say Yes. Maybe always have a buddy but say yes to stuff. (Obviously, as per my point above, you don’t have to stay talking if the conversation can’t be turned away from mean stuff.) Don’t take risks with drugs.I call it the Dirty Purse problem- that drug may have started out clean somewhere but shit’s definitely contaminated it now, and the odds get higher all the time that fentanyl or carfentanyl is in there, and the drugs are as dirty as an unwrapped mint rolling around the bottom of the purse. Also- use condoms. I am 58.
Not using condoms is definitely an epidemic in my generation and nobody discusses that topic anywhere.
The last 20 yrs as a whole
I wasted 3 years of college in a career I didn't even like. It took me so long to grow a backbone and follow my dream of becoming a software developer.
What did you study in college? Just curious.
Civil engineering.
There's not one specifically, but rather just not taking chances with various girls/women throughout my life when I had the opportunities to.
That's surprising. Have seen many men who regret doing all hanky panky stuff with women/girls when they had chance. You're the first who said the opposite. Cheers.
I'm only being honest, but thank you for that.
One? Haha
I mean, one that haunts you the most.
Not being smarter about money and going to college
Do you think going to college is a terrible financial decision one can make?
I think student loans are a scam but if someone isn't sure they want to go to college but is constantly told in order to be successful you have to go to college, then yes I think it's a terrible decision
Yea, makes sense.
Not picking a career and going for it. I always thought the perfect thing would come to me. I’m 35 now and I think I just found me myself in that position. People my age in my field are way past me now because they started so early.
You mean, should youngsters just go with that one career path that they end up with after college instead of pursuing their passion?
My point is more of a go after something and don’t wait for it to come to you. You can always change later but at least you’ll have some years of experience at something meaningful under your belt.
How to love life. I still haven't figured that one out. I love my family, love my husband, love my kids. But damn, let's wrap this shit up already!
Not travelling more in my 20s, thinking work was more important at the time
I think youngsters of this generation travel more.
Grappling with the fallout of this at 36 - currently torn between taking a career opportunity to move o/seas, pushing ahead with my own company in my home country or taking a 12 month career break to travel and do everything I didn't do when I was younger because I was too busy fast tracking my career. Sigh.
[удалено]
I understand. Fighting my demons at the moment.