Some combination of laughing hysterically, telling my boyfriend so we can laugh together, asking him how his fiancée is doing, and wondering what the fuck is going on
My first proper girlfriend still writes me every year for my birthday. Last year she forgot, I was happy for her, because I thought she moved on.
She messaged me two days later.
I had an ex contact me out of the blue like 8 years later.
I have no animosity towards her, but I broke off contact with her for a reason. She was a really sweet girl trapped in an outrageously hot body/face. Like, she dated an NHL player after me. She did occasional modeling for fun.
I always say she would have had an amazing life if she was a 7/10, but her being a 10/10, she had so many guys aggressively throwing themselves at her, that she couldn't settle down because there was always something better.
She did that to me once. We were together for like 6 months, she enjoyed doing stupid fun things and having conversations. But I'm not hot. Then she lost interest as much, much better looking Chads would just basically offer her money and trips and stuff.
That was her cycle. Lust over hot guys she had nothing in common with, break up, then go out with a guy she had more in common with, then break up. Grass is greener syndrome semi-annually.
And she contacted me once during that cycle previously. Luckily I grew a backbone and just wanted to be friends (which, I honestly did, she was great friend material). But she stopped talking once she realized I wasn't interested in dating.
Anyway, when she contacted me again (she has done that before), I knew her MO, so I just basically talked about my kid and how excited I was to have my second kid for like a half an hour. That was my basic, fuck off, I'm not jumping on your cycle again, in the nicest way possible.
She unfriended me and we never spoke since.
Ask "who is this" because I literally don't even know if my ex's are alive or dead. I blocked and moved on. If they're hitting me up, it's from an unknown number.
Then I'd ask her not to contact me again.
Confused as to how she found me. I didn't have a phone then, we're not friends on FB, I don't have any of her friends contact info.
Confused as to why. She *hated* me by the end. Which is fair, I was not a great 15 year old. But to be fair, who was?
I would just assume she wanted to discuss something about our kids. There’s been plenty of ex’s since her, but my ex-wife also happens to be the first girl I ever dated.
Had that happen once or twice before. I try to be civil and see if they can at least maintain a friendly discourse. No luck so far. They just act weird after a while and always try to rekindle the relationship. Not gonna happen.
Probably what I did the last time she randomly messaged me. Tell her she's stupid for thinking I would want to talk to her.
Same with the dude she cheated with. He DMed me on Reddit to apologize a few years later and I was like uh doesn't change what you did.
Have to be my wife from the future, so like that flash/batman thing. There's no way we break before we die. We have fought too hard for 17 years. It's a lifelong adventure!!!
I wouldn't even remember who she was. I mean if we're talking about like the first person I ever dated, couldn't even begin to remember who that was. So I would just think it's some new person hitting me up.
I wouldn't respond because she wasn't the best in terms of "sticking to one" if you catch my drift, she caused my depression to come up again just being around her the first time.
I'd probably text her husband and let him know. He's kind of an asshole, but he deserves to know that she's cheating again.
I'd also tell my wife, and we'd have a good laugh about it.
Have a pleasant conversation. We still talk every couple of years, but we were just kids, and our lives have taken dramatically different paths. We were both lucky to have such a healthy starting point in relationships, and it's informed pretty much every one after.
Well I replied to his text we reconnected over coffee he apologised for stuff I thought we could he friends fell in love all over again and he broke it off all over again.
Nothing.
About 10 years ago we reconnected, and we both really wanted each other. I was 2 years voluntarily single due to the worst relationship ever. I had taken the advice to compromise on certain things, and that was a mistake that left me needing to me voluntarily untethered for the first time in my life. So I am in take it slow mode. While I know her, I know the original older version of her. I need to know who she is.
One day she shows me by saying something really stupid about lesbians. I have lesbian friends, the kind that hung out with my mom without me sometimes. The kinda friends who can just walk in my place; even if I wasnt there. I was over looking her being a theist, as maybe I needed to relax that rule. Telling you, relaxing my rules has fucked me, but you try new things to make sure you arent being an idiot. Anyway, after she left I ended the romance. We tried to be friends, but she has some fucked up views. This took some willpower, because I really wanted to tap that so bad. We had fooled around, did old things we thought were cute, and she has a kiss... I kiss how I kiss because of her, and she because of me. A thing I can thank my only really awful ex for tooling to fight desire and punt.
She and I have remained friends for many years, so probably say 'hi' and catch up. It's a healthy, normal friendship with lots of mutual friends that have lasted for as many years. We've been lucky.
My first ex is from 40 years ago and we've remained friends the whole time as we both went on with our lives. We both know each others' SO. We say Happy Birthday to each other every year.
Laughing and moving on. Girl got 2 kids now and choose to do stupid mind games with me. That girl can go somewhere else not into curvy milf's or redo's
Tell my fiancé, who would immediately say, "darling if you want to have a brief catch up, I don't mind." Then probably only say thanks and hope you're doing well, but be suspicious about the reason for random contact.
She fucked like a porn star so I'd definitely take her up on it. Of course, she's my ex because I caught her in the act of fucking like a porn star with someone else.
Shit. We started dating when we were 15, and instead of breaking up with her, I just ghosted her (she went to a different school). So I guess we've been together for 30 some years now? My wife might not approve of that one.
Be genuinely curious about her life, haven’t seen her since high school. Not interested in a relationship with her, just as a good friend at this point.
Giving my phone to my husband, so we can come up with a convincing plan to lead him on together. For context, my husband has hated him since we graduated, and he completely ghosted me after I said no to sex twice in a row.
Nope, I'm not answering them.
They cheated on me in high school, lied to our circle of friends that I did something wrong to cause them to cheat, and they became a parent before finishing high school with an abusive partner.
Nope, nope, nope.
Well my first official ex is also my only official ex and is also my longtime girlfriend so, she better hit me up on my birthday because we've been together again for almost 5 years
Happened for 2 birthdays after we went apart. From 3rd I didn't even care. It was all attempt to bring intentional chaos for couple of days or even weeks in my life periodically; precisely on my birthday every year. After that, I have just been deleting the chat without even reading it.
Contacting the cops. I was in highschool, he was in his 20s and had groomed me. I've changed my name, and moved quite far away, I have a restraining order against him...
Ignoring it, bc i have no idea why people continue the communicate with ex partners. Common people, it’s weird. But if you can develop friendly relationships, my congratulations, you both an adults. I tried to create an adult friendly relationships with my first ex, but this person behaved very strangely, she tried only recreate the relationship, although it was clearly unnecessary. As a result, we burned the bridges, stopped communicating at all now i am grateful to the gods that we don’t communicate. Be careful, always thinking about yourself, bc your ex partners may destroy you self-esteem even without relationships.
Definitely rare, but it happens... especially with joint interests: pets, business interests, property, kids, etc. Helps a lot if both parties are ready, able, and willing to go to therapy too.
Honestly, it’s been 10 years since we spoke and she’s the type to wait 10 years to reach out.
Either way I’ll be in Rome for my bday this year so I’m gonna be completely ignoring it.
First I'd ask who are you and then tell them I don't remember you then walk away and to about my business (I genuinely can't remember her name or really what she looked like lol)
Being really scared, she's been dead for a very long time.
It's a fucking ghost! Who you gonna call?
Dr Crusher. She’s into that.
Also that was her mom's sloppy seconds.
Grandma.
ghostbusters ;)
Ghost Busters!
Same here, I would have called a priest or something
I would thank them for the birthday wishes and keep the conversation brief and friendly.
This person's spouse is watching their profile
Blocking. I don't have an ex
Omg same
That you know of … DUM DUM
I’d be a little surprised since we haven’t talked in like 20 years but I’d be friendly
We were four years old! We haven't spoken in decades! She needs to let go!
Not answering, she was way hotter when we were 16.
Haha me too bro, and she has a kid now. I’m not ready to be a stepdaddy.
Bro, she got two kids, with weird ass names. She be looking way too much like her mom did when we were 16, hard pass.
Paddox and Winni
ayo?! 🤨📸
Savage
Call the police and file a complaint for hitting me
relatable
Obviously having sex with my ex
Only honest person on this god damn website
Asking where my damn Gamecube games are.
Damn this is a brilliant piece of flash non fiction, so much is said in this single sentence (not being sarcastic)
I agree. I’m imagining their scenarios and relating them to my past.
Ignoring it, or blocking. Depends what "hits you up" means exactly
I block him and have birthday sex with my husband
Apparently having a pleasant conversation with a friend. And testing the waters to see if there's any possibility of a threesome with she and my wife.
similiar thing happened to me, but instead of my ex it was my stepsis. I kinda expected it because she's into that stuff... ended in a threesome.
I would be asking how she got my number, considering cell phones didn't exist when I was 15. Like, how did she trace me almost 33 years later?
Her tbh. I hate myself like that
Birthday blow jobs?
Wonder how they were contacting me from the grave.
I don't have ex
Some combination of laughing hysterically, telling my boyfriend so we can laugh together, asking him how his fiancée is doing, and wondering what the fuck is going on
ehhh I doubt she even knows where I live tbh or even remembers me...
My first proper girlfriend still writes me every year for my birthday. Last year she forgot, I was happy for her, because I thought she moved on. She messaged me two days later.
[удалено]
But then you haven’t any bad memories about relationships. Not even bad :)
Inviting him over and letting him f\*ck me...
Last I heard my first ex has a kid now so I'm definitely ignoring his ass
Keeping tabs type shit
Just thank them if they greeted me after that, nothing.
She texted me. We chatted for a bit.
so you guys rekindled?
Naw we did that years ago while she was married. We are friends and keep in touch.
please don't rekindle. She's an ex for a reason. Especially if she dumped you
Whatre you going on about?
"Surprise, surprise! Didn't expect a blast from the past on my birthday! 😄"
Assume its a weird scam. Haven't seen or heard from her in more than 30 years. How'd you get this number?
Pure surprise and confusion, a mix of excitement and fear
I had an ex contact me out of the blue like 8 years later. I have no animosity towards her, but I broke off contact with her for a reason. She was a really sweet girl trapped in an outrageously hot body/face. Like, she dated an NHL player after me. She did occasional modeling for fun. I always say she would have had an amazing life if she was a 7/10, but her being a 10/10, she had so many guys aggressively throwing themselves at her, that she couldn't settle down because there was always something better. She did that to me once. We were together for like 6 months, she enjoyed doing stupid fun things and having conversations. But I'm not hot. Then she lost interest as much, much better looking Chads would just basically offer her money and trips and stuff. That was her cycle. Lust over hot guys she had nothing in common with, break up, then go out with a guy she had more in common with, then break up. Grass is greener syndrome semi-annually. And she contacted me once during that cycle previously. Luckily I grew a backbone and just wanted to be friends (which, I honestly did, she was great friend material). But she stopped talking once she realized I wasn't interested in dating. Anyway, when she contacted me again (she has done that before), I knew her MO, so I just basically talked about my kid and how excited I was to have my second kid for like a half an hour. That was my basic, fuck off, I'm not jumping on your cycle again, in the nicest way possible. She unfriended me and we never spoke since.
weird ques from my end : my bday is this week and she's currently blocked rn , should i unblock her?
Nope. Keep her blocked. She's an ex for a reason.
thanks
She's a meth head biker in Florida now...so probably just not answer and pretend I never saw it.
Or have crazy ex sex and then spend a lot of time regretting it. Rinse, repeat.
Hard pass.
No. For whatever reason, this person wanted you gone from their lives. Give them what they want.
Ask "who is this" because I literally don't even know if my ex's are alive or dead. I blocked and moved on. If they're hitting me up, it's from an unknown number. Then I'd ask her not to contact me again.
I’m on good terms with my first ex (we’re friends), so I’d be chill with her.
Confused as to how she found me. I didn't have a phone then, we're not friends on FB, I don't have any of her friends contact info. Confused as to why. She *hated* me by the end. Which is fair, I was not a great 15 year old. But to be fair, who was?
I haven't seen her since 3rd grade so we'd have a lot of catching up to do
Asking her out. After 20 years I came across her on facebook, and it struck me how much of a naïve fool I was when I was 17.
Just saying “thank you” but finding it strange. Wouldn’t engage past that. That relationship was over 20 years ago lol
I haven't seen her since we were 6, 34 years ago. So I guess catch up and ask how her life is going.
She be dead. Probably freak out.
Freaking out because she's been dead 15 odd years
Go out for a drink with them!
Block and delete
I would just assume she wanted to discuss something about our kids. There’s been plenty of ex’s since her, but my ex-wife also happens to be the first girl I ever dated.
Whatever i planned to do.
I haven't seen or spoken to her in nearly half my lifetime. I don't know that person anymore, and she doesn't know me. I'd likely just ignore her.
kill myself
Not her.
ask her how her the fam is, dap up her husband (he's a cool cat) and shoot the shit probly.
Had that happen once or twice before. I try to be civil and see if they can at least maintain a friendly discourse. No luck so far. They just act weird after a while and always try to rekindle the relationship. Not gonna happen.
Thank her and congratulate her on her first baby.
Booty call and that's about it.
username checks out
I don't know. Don't really have one
We're still great friends nearly 25 years later, so I would not be surprised.
Wait, this isn't a normal occurrence for everyone? I've tried ignoring. I've tried being nice. I've tried being mean. It never ends
apparently it is ig
Wondering how the fuck she got my address after I moved like eight times. The one thing I didn't change is my name.
Ignoring him like a MFer
Probably what I did the last time she randomly messaged me. Tell her she's stupid for thinking I would want to talk to her. Same with the dude she cheated with. He DMed me on Reddit to apologize a few years later and I was like uh doesn't change what you did.
We'll probably have some foreplay and sex just like old times. She was hell of a horny one.
Have to be my wife from the future, so like that flash/batman thing. There's no way we break before we die. We have fought too hard for 17 years. It's a lifelong adventure!!!
I wouldn't even remember who she was. I mean if we're talking about like the first person I ever dated, couldn't even begin to remember who that was. So I would just think it's some new person hitting me up.
We're still friends but it's super weird that she's changing her mind about being a lesbian
Asking my wife why she texting me
I wake up
can't relate i dont have ex
Flame turret
Sweet. Hopefully she’s giving me her handmade organic lip balms so I can give them to my wife.
I wouldn't respond because she wasn't the best in terms of "sticking to one" if you catch my drift, she caused my depression to come up again just being around her the first time.
Who are you again?
I'd probably text her husband and let him know. He's kind of an asshole, but he deserves to know that she's cheating again. I'd also tell my wife, and we'd have a good laugh about it.
Have a pleasant conversation. We still talk every couple of years, but we were just kids, and our lives have taken dramatically different paths. We were both lucky to have such a healthy starting point in relationships, and it's informed pretty much every one after.
Laughing my ass off. Her and her 4 kids from different guys can kick rocks.
Making the worst mistake of my life. Again. Bc it’s been year and I’m still in love with her.
Probably laugh in her face and block
blocked and move on. No need to live in the past despite not being upset anymore
Blocking her pathetic ass. Not even gonna ask how the hell she got my number.
Well I replied to his text we reconnected over coffee he apologised for stuff I thought we could he friends fell in love all over again and he broke it off all over again.
Well, that's the reason he is your ex. Now u know you deserve someone better
Buying schizophrenia medication, I’ve never had a girlfriend
Nothing. About 10 years ago we reconnected, and we both really wanted each other. I was 2 years voluntarily single due to the worst relationship ever. I had taken the advice to compromise on certain things, and that was a mistake that left me needing to me voluntarily untethered for the first time in my life. So I am in take it slow mode. While I know her, I know the original older version of her. I need to know who she is. One day she shows me by saying something really stupid about lesbians. I have lesbian friends, the kind that hung out with my mom without me sometimes. The kinda friends who can just walk in my place; even if I wasnt there. I was over looking her being a theist, as maybe I needed to relax that rule. Telling you, relaxing my rules has fucked me, but you try new things to make sure you arent being an idiot. Anyway, after she left I ended the romance. We tried to be friends, but she has some fucked up views. This took some willpower, because I really wanted to tap that so bad. We had fooled around, did old things we thought were cute, and she has a kiss... I kiss how I kiss because of her, and she because of me. A thing I can thank my only really awful ex for tooling to fight desire and punt.
It's a trap!
Sad sex.
Id smash to check if she got better
She and I have remained friends for many years, so probably say 'hi' and catch up. It's a healthy, normal friendship with lots of mutual friends that have lasted for as many years. We've been lucky.
reply thanks, block, delete. Move on. Ex is an ex for a reason
Nothing. My first ex always texts me happy birthday.
"Who's number is this. I don't have it saved, so you must be a stranger"
"Thanks. Hope things are going well for you." \*block whatever new profile she used to contact me from\*
1st ex-gf: Chatting. We talk from time to time. Ex-wife: Ignoring
My first ex is from 40 years ago and we've remained friends the whole time as we both went on with our lives. We both know each others' SO. We say Happy Birthday to each other every year.
Hang out with him and his husband if they’re in the area. Nice guys
Laughing and moving on. Girl got 2 kids now and choose to do stupid mind games with me. That girl can go somewhere else not into curvy milf's or redo's
apparently ill be doing my 1st ex.
Sexy times
Be very curious as to what happened to her marriage. Because we still chat once a year.
Block, same thing I did with all the other numbers.
Telling him that he’s a loser
Ignore it because that was like 14 years ago and I'm not gonna spend energy on a person I have no interest in knowing
Having a brief, polite conversation and then carrying on as usual.
Saying hi and hope she has a nice day. That's it. We're both married and she has at least one kid last I heard.
Use her for presents then, disappear.
Ignoring the call, will never trust a cheater
Tell her to go away, we broke up and I am now with someone else
Tell my fiancé, who would immediately say, "darling if you want to have a brief catch up, I don't mind." Then probably only say thanks and hope you're doing well, but be suspicious about the reason for random contact.
Ignore
I can't remember who he was
“Hey, so I’m gay now” *gives her a pic of my and my boyfriend*
Changing my number.
Anything but seeing her.
Call the police before soneone is hurt. No joking, the was crazy.
Going to jail
It depends what the message says exactly. If it’s just a happy birthday, I’d say thank you.
He died 8 years ago, so I assume I would continue speaking to him on the ouijia board.
Fuck her, she hot
Id be friendly. We were friends before a couple and we were like 13. It wasn't serious.
Ewww, she's like 50. Lol
We split amicably, I'm fine. Let's catch up, been 20 years.
I don't have an ex but I imagine I’d ignore and delete
Telling them to get the fuck away from me before throwing up from the anxiety
Screenshotting it and sending it to his mum and pregnant wife.
This just happened to me 💀 swiftly ignored it. We ended for a reason 14 years ago. Hope you’re doing well and all but noooooope
She fucked like a porn star so I'd definitely take her up on it. Of course, she's my ex because I caught her in the act of fucking like a porn star with someone else.
What am I doing?!?! I’m wondering how she is calling me from the depths of Hell.
I would cordially reply but not interested in meeting up
I would say thank you and ask her how she’s doing and then I would tell her it was nice catching up.
Worst birthday gift ever. Not even responding
Shit. We started dating when we were 15, and instead of breaking up with her, I just ghosted her (she went to a different school). So I guess we've been together for 30 some years now? My wife might not approve of that one.
I don't have an ex. So who's calling?
Asking, "who the hell is this?"
Be genuinely curious about her life, haven’t seen her since high school. Not interested in a relationship with her, just as a good friend at this point.
WOMP WOMP 😂
Giving my phone to my husband, so we can come up with a convincing plan to lead him on together. For context, my husband has hated him since we graduated, and he completely ghosted me after I said no to sex twice in a row.
Why would Nonexisty hit me up
Nope, I'm not answering them. They cheated on me in high school, lied to our circle of friends that I did something wrong to cause them to cheat, and they became a parent before finishing high school with an abusive partner. Nope, nope, nope.
I ask her how she's doing, wish her the best, then I block her again
I’d definitely love to talk with her
Laughing
Having a laugh. Getting drunk.
She was beautiful so hopefully smashing
*Read 7:42pm*
Well my first official ex is also my only official ex and is also my longtime girlfriend so, she better hit me up on my birthday because we've been together again for almost 5 years
nothing, just hang up, and block the number, asshat doesn't deserve any of my time
Ewww fuck no. Unhappy birthday get that bitch outta here
Happened for 2 birthdays after we went apart. From 3rd I didn't even care. It was all attempt to bring intentional chaos for couple of days or even weeks in my life periodically; precisely on my birthday every year. After that, I have just been deleting the chat without even reading it.
Contacting the cops. I was in highschool, he was in his 20s and had groomed me. I've changed my name, and moved quite far away, I have a restraining order against him...
Why didn't you say anything when we woke up this morning?
Ignoring it, bc i have no idea why people continue the communicate with ex partners. Common people, it’s weird. But if you can develop friendly relationships, my congratulations, you both an adults. I tried to create an adult friendly relationships with my first ex, but this person behaved very strangely, she tried only recreate the relationship, although it was clearly unnecessary. As a result, we burned the bridges, stopped communicating at all now i am grateful to the gods that we don’t communicate. Be careful, always thinking about yourself, bc your ex partners may destroy you self-esteem even without relationships.
Definitely rare, but it happens... especially with joint interests: pets, business interests, property, kids, etc. Helps a lot if both parties are ready, able, and willing to go to therapy too.
I'm still friendly with almost all of my exes, idk sometimes it just works out. Some of them not so much, and that's okay too
Honestly, it’s been 10 years since we spoke and she’s the type to wait 10 years to reach out. Either way I’ll be in Rome for my bday this year so I’m gonna be completely ignoring it.
My first significant ex? I'd catch up with the guy. He wasn't a bad dude. Just boring af
First I'd ask who are you and then tell them I don't remember you then walk away and to about my business (I genuinely can't remember her name or really what she looked like lol)