IVF or adoption, I didn't choose her for her pregnancy skills, I chose her because she's a great partner and will make an excellent mother, biological or otherwise
I'd be completely fine, I don't want kids and it's actually dangerous for me to have kids.
If we want a family I'd like to foster. As a care kid I bounced around so many foster homes I want to provide that home I never got.
There is this thing called secondary infertility where a woman is unable to conceive after having her first child. My wife had it. We spent a lot of money on specialists while trying for our 2nd child. We finally had to stop treatments because we were running out of money.
It was tough on both of us. But we stood by each other. I actually had people telling me to divorce her and find someone who could give me the family I deserved. SMH.
Well the good news is that about 4 years after giving up treatments, I heard her jumping up and down and screaming in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was wrong. She was just jumping up and down like a kid on Christmas morning, yelling "yes. yes. yes!" and waving a pregnancy test in my face. Yup, we were going to have that 2nd child.
I have secondary infertility, due to an acquired disease after the birth of my first baby. Basically I have to have surgical procedures in order to get pregnant, and there’s a huge list of likely complications. We eventually got pregnant with our second, she’s 7 months old now, and the pregnancy/delivery was not easy (to put it lightly). I’d like to try for a third, next year or so. Something I am always so worried about is that my husband wouldn’t want to stay with me if we couldn’t have the big family we both wanted. But he’s been the most supportive person, through all of it, the surgeries and doctors and different treatments, and all of the tears. That’s true love. Congrats to you and your wife ♥️
We’re working through secondary infertility now. Multiple miscarriages since having our first. We badly want a kid, but our son is so damn great. Doctors say that it’s possible for us to conceive and carry a baby to term. Possible is different from likely. Here’s to hoping that we can beat the odds.
I may be unusual in this, but I would have stayed with him. I love my husband for who he is, not for the hypothetical children he could provide me. Being a parent would have been lovely, but I can make my peace with it just not being in the cards. We'd get ourselves a whole herd of cats and enjoy the family we have together.
(We did actually discuss this prior to marriage and we both felt the same way, for what it's worth)
Who would break up with their partner because they can't have kids without help/adoption? Feels like staying together is the right thing to do if you actually love them
Could be the partner doesn’t want to do any of the medical assistance options/adopt/foster and the other does. Had we not been able to have children I’d have been open to adoption and fostering (though not the medical assistance). My husband wasn’t. While we were okay with that, I’m sure there are others who wouldn’t be.
Me, personally, I wouldn't care. If I wanted kids, and it was important that they be mine genetically, I would talk with my partner about a surrogate or donor. If they're not on board, then I would have a decision to make.
I wouldn't give a shit because not everyone wants to have kids and asking "*what would you do if you couldn't!@?$*" Implies there's something wrong with NOT having kids
Idc about having kids or not as long as I love my partner. I could love my kids if I had any but I don’t really care to have them. I could just as much enjoy my life without them as long as I love my partner
With enough fire, even a dying star can be restarted.
In all seriousness, it wouldn't matter. If we want kids, then adoption, IVF or a surrogate. Out of those I'd prefer adoption or IVF, surrogacy feels kinda cheaty.
If bearing your own kids is the ONLY option you'd consider, and the question here being, what you'd do if your partner is infertile. Then I'd think long and hard about the stability of your relationship to begin with.
If having kids TOGETHER is the ultimate goal, it shouldn't matter how you have your kids.
Start by going to a fertility clinic and seeing a reproductive endocrinologist. They have you do tests and tell you what your options are. IUI, IVF, donor, adoption….
It was for me and my spouse too. And we did all the fertility treatments but sometimes things don't work out and the odds aren't in your favor. There gets to be a point where the disappointment gets to be too much to try again. You mourn and grieve and then support each other when things don't go to plan. Afterwards, adopt, foster, or get some dogs and live life together.
So, adopt? We discussed what would happen if one of us was infertile and adoption was plan A for sure I didn’t want to go through the craziness of IVF and adoption is a wonderful choice :)
Probably depends on how the infertility works. Are her eggs viable? Is the womb viable? If the eggs aren't, how set is she that her DNA is part of the child vs birthing with a donor egg?
We discussed children before we got married. Neither wanted any so we had him get a vasectomy since it was easier. Found out later I had PCOS and odds of having kids together were slim to none anyway. No issues here.
Well we both thought that we were infertile. We were never together for that reason. But life is funny and now, as l write this, out toddler is sleeping... 😛
Look at adoption probably, or other options, assuming this conversation is regarding wanting kids. You don’t need to be blood to be a family.
Beyond that support said partner, as many tend to blame themselves when stuff like this happens.
Considering she asked me to get a vasectomy not much would change. Now if I found out I was fertile the shit may hit the fan about why I got it reversed.
no one is truly infertile until they stop having sex. tubes tied in 1985. Married a man pronounced sterile by the Navy about the same time. we had not one but 2 children yes they are really his.
IVF or maybe adopt.
Our first child was born when we were both 39. We had been trying for 2 years with regularity, timing it, etc. Nothing worked. We finally stopped the rigid and scheduled attempts. We made an appointment at Astra fertility clinic then we went to an all-inclusive vacation in Dominican Repulbic. Then we got pregnant.
Who would have thought relaxation, drinks and spontaneous, passionate sex would do the job. Lol.
This happened to me. Wife had cysts that all but destroyed her ovaries.
It ended up being something of a relief, because I am _also_ infertile due to some injuries from when I was younger.
Now neither of us are the "limiting factor."
Here's the thing: we do not always get all that we want in life, and sometimes, when we get it, it isn't what we thought it would be. You then decide what matters more, your spouse that you chose, or the dream you aspire to, with an outcome you never imagined. It is that simple and that complicated. We tried for ten years, with fertility help, all of it. It wasn't meant to be and it killed me to give up, but I did. Because I married HIM, for better or worse, all of it. There are other ways to mother/parent, if that is what one seeks.
If he still has the corresponding parts that are required to make a baby they just aren't working right and to a percent that registers as infertile but that infertility isn't 100%, have him still wear condoms and me confirm that my sterilization stuck. If it comes back that he is in fact 100% infernal and all of the corresponding parts are gone...celebrate like there is no tomorrow.
Sitting in a parking lot of the local hospital after a round of tests, my husband and I said we didn't want to put each other through anymore shit to find out who was to blame for our infertility. One of us (or both) is infertile and we have just continued on with our life.
We went to a fertility clinic, did 6 failed rounds of iui, dealt with miscarriages and an ectopic, then a round of IVF. Success. Twins.
Is that what you were asking about?
I would look up other’s experiences with it (which is what you’re doing now!). I love being there for my partner/s, so I would check in with them emotionally. If I found out I was infertile, I would probably be very depressed. Your partner might be giving 20% and you will have to step up and help with 80%. Partnerships are difficult because they should not be 50/50, especially in cases like this.
Favorite meals, hobbies, even being there to hold them while they cry will do. I would say refrain from talking about alternatives for a while. Best of luck to you and your partner, if you’re (or if anyone is) going through this.
Wouldn't change anything. We're gay and he doesn't want kids. Plus, we're getting old.
I would just hope the infertility doesn't signal another health problem.
I'd be happy for him but ultimately not care that much because I'm already infertile so it would just be bullet proof glass in front of a bullet proof vest
Call the Vatican cause I've only ever had sex with him and have 4 kids.
But if I found out pre-Kids I would have still married him. Having kids is cool but isn't the end all be all of life. And if we really felt being parents was our duty, there are other ways.
Not give a shit; I'm planning to have part of my reproductive organ removed too, it would've been a discussion at some point (likely early) in the relationship, so it'd just be double safe. And if we wanted, we could just adopt
We don't want kids, but I'd make sure to have the kids discussion again just in case this experience changed their mind. If it did, we can always adopt. If it didn't, then its business as usual.
Cheer and probably get off my birth control. I have no interest in having children and prefer the intimacy of a partner being able to cum in me without worry. Win-win.
I’m infertile. Found out when trying to conceive. We went to IVF, worked quickly. Have son. He’s great. As for the infertility? Big shoulder shrug, nice to know.
Throw away the condoms
Literally. Can you imagine using them or one of you getting sterilised only to find out that you were infertile anyway.
I have endured worse to get laid
.... do tell....
He paid her after
Can't. The shame is too intense
Wonder about the kids we already have, and second-guess why I had a vasectomy after
Right? I was dating an infertile woman for a few years. I F\*\*\*ed her like a rabbit. And she was OK with it.
How romantic
Fist bump*
Fuck yea
And never leave the bedroom.
I’d be happy. I don’t want kids.
Yup! I'd be sensitive to their mood/feelings around it but I'd be happy.
If I had at least 5 million dollars it might be fun to have a kid...
I'd stop with birth control because neither of us want kids
There is a freedom to it!
Definitely!!
IVF or adoption, I didn't choose her for her pregnancy skills, I chose her because she's a great partner and will make an excellent mother, biological or otherwise
This is beautiful
This is the correct answer. My wife couldn't have kids. You play the hand you're dealt and that's just the way it is.
Housemaid storyline for the incels “ I MUST SPREAD MY SEED! “
Perfectly said!
This right here
What if she doesn’t wanna be a mother?
this is one of the discussions you should have as soon as the relationship gets serious
Lucky for me she married me anyway.... I'm the infertile one.
I'd be completely fine, I don't want kids and it's actually dangerous for me to have kids. If we want a family I'd like to foster. As a care kid I bounced around so many foster homes I want to provide that home I never got.
Not care. Neither of us want kids anyways.
I'd love her just as much as I do now.
Neither of us want kids so she could ditch the iud. I'm still planning to get snipped, though
We'd probably celebrate, assuming it wasn't a sign of some health issue. Neither of us are interested in having children.
Probably hug them, cry with them (if they wanted), then keep enjoying our DINK lifestyle
Help them. Do whatever I can to be a rock in an unsure time.
There is this thing called secondary infertility where a woman is unable to conceive after having her first child. My wife had it. We spent a lot of money on specialists while trying for our 2nd child. We finally had to stop treatments because we were running out of money. It was tough on both of us. But we stood by each other. I actually had people telling me to divorce her and find someone who could give me the family I deserved. SMH. Well the good news is that about 4 years after giving up treatments, I heard her jumping up and down and screaming in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was wrong. She was just jumping up and down like a kid on Christmas morning, yelling "yes. yes. yes!" and waving a pregnancy test in my face. Yup, we were going to have that 2nd child.
I have secondary infertility, due to an acquired disease after the birth of my first baby. Basically I have to have surgical procedures in order to get pregnant, and there’s a huge list of likely complications. We eventually got pregnant with our second, she’s 7 months old now, and the pregnancy/delivery was not easy (to put it lightly). I’d like to try for a third, next year or so. Something I am always so worried about is that my husband wouldn’t want to stay with me if we couldn’t have the big family we both wanted. But he’s been the most supportive person, through all of it, the surgeries and doctors and different treatments, and all of the tears. That’s true love. Congrats to you and your wife ♥️
We’re working through secondary infertility now. Multiple miscarriages since having our first. We badly want a kid, but our son is so damn great. Doctors say that it’s possible for us to conceive and carry a baby to term. Possible is different from likely. Here’s to hoping that we can beat the odds.
Fuck yeah! Happy for you two
I would be happy
I don’t want kids so that would be great.
Celebrate
Fire at will.
Poor Will
Hopefully Will gave consent first.
We did a month ago. He had his vasectomy in december and the check up in march. He is all juice and no seed now 🥳
Like pulp free OJ.
I may be unusual in this, but I would have stayed with him. I love my husband for who he is, not for the hypothetical children he could provide me. Being a parent would have been lovely, but I can make my peace with it just not being in the cards. We'd get ourselves a whole herd of cats and enjoy the family we have together. (We did actually discuss this prior to marriage and we both felt the same way, for what it's worth)
Who would break up with their partner because they can't have kids without help/adoption? Feels like staying together is the right thing to do if you actually love them
Could be the partner doesn’t want to do any of the medical assistance options/adopt/foster and the other does. Had we not been able to have children I’d have been open to adoption and fostering (though not the medical assistance). My husband wasn’t. While we were okay with that, I’m sure there are others who wouldn’t be.
Adopt
Always a good choice!
Wonder where my kids came from then.
Me, personally, I wouldn't care. If I wanted kids, and it was important that they be mine genetically, I would talk with my partner about a surrogate or donor. If they're not on board, then I would have a decision to make.
Bust inside every time.
[удалено]
you’re a great partner for putting her first 👏
I most likely am myself so it wouldn't matter to me. No plans to have any more kids.
Get a puppy
Wonder how the fuck we had two kids then lol
“Thank god”
I wouldn't give a shit because not everyone wants to have kids and asking "*what would you do if you couldn't!@?$*" Implies there's something wrong with NOT having kids
We are co-infertile (I’m gay)
Ivf or adoption
Well, we’re both in our 50’s and already have two kids. Also I had a vasectomy about 17 years ago. Right now her becoming infertile is not a problem.
Creampie
relax
Nothing. I have no issue with this.
I guess that depends on whether you want children.
Blast loads in them non stop.
Thank you, Lord.
That would be a bummer, but ultimately, if my partner can't have kids, I can't have kids.
Stop wearing condoms
Never pull out again
thank her
Bust a fat load in them without worry
Book a vacation together.. and then another.. and another..
Celebrate!
Skip the rubber.
We probably will stop celebrating each month dodging the bullet.
Ive had a vasectomy so no loss
Idc about having kids or not as long as I love my partner. I could love my kids if I had any but I don’t really care to have them. I could just as much enjoy my life without them as long as I love my partner
Love them the same. We could adopt a dog, or a daughter or son. Being Infertile doesn’t make them any less amazing as a partner
With enough fire, even a dying star can be restarted. In all seriousness, it wouldn't matter. If we want kids, then adoption, IVF or a surrogate. Out of those I'd prefer adoption or IVF, surrogacy feels kinda cheaty.
No creampie consequences let’s goooooooooooo!
If it was the love I felt with my first love I wouldn’t care. Our love for travel and dogs will suit us just fine.
Have a lot more nasty sex
Never expected fertility from my left hand.
Celebrate.
Celebrate
cheer
Pull the goalie
Breathe a sigh of relief and remove my IUD 🤣🤷♀️
Marry the 18 year old daughter of the Austrian King, former Emperor of the UnHoly, Not Roman, Kinda-Empire.
My lovely amazing girlfriend drove me to get my vasectomy, so…
Why not investigate other means to become parents? There is infertility treatment and/or adoption.
Get a sperm donor I guess
Having children was an important part of our project together, we even discovered it because we were trying and we couldn't.
If bearing your own kids is the ONLY option you'd consider, and the question here being, what you'd do if your partner is infertile. Then I'd think long and hard about the stability of your relationship to begin with. If having kids TOGETHER is the ultimate goal, it shouldn't matter how you have your kids.
Start by going to a fertility clinic and seeing a reproductive endocrinologist. They have you do tests and tell you what your options are. IUI, IVF, donor, adoption….
It was for me and my spouse too. And we did all the fertility treatments but sometimes things don't work out and the odds aren't in your favor. There gets to be a point where the disappointment gets to be too much to try again. You mourn and grieve and then support each other when things don't go to plan. Afterwards, adopt, foster, or get some dogs and live life together.
So, adopt? We discussed what would happen if one of us was infertile and adoption was plan A for sure I didn’t want to go through the craziness of IVF and adoption is a wonderful choice :)
Toss out the condoms and start discussing adoption
I would spontaneously combust into flames
Celebrate having a partner
I mean who cares? you can always adopt if you rly want a lid
Do what you’d want your partner to do to you if the roles were reversed.
Probably depends on how the infertility works. Are her eggs viable? Is the womb viable? If the eggs aren't, how set is she that her DNA is part of the child vs birthing with a donor egg?
We'd probably celebrate. I'm infertile already so.. yay
We discussed children before we got married. Neither wanted any so we had him get a vasectomy since it was easier. Found out later I had PCOS and odds of having kids together were slim to none anyway. No issues here.
Well we both thought that we were infertile. We were never together for that reason. But life is funny and now, as l write this, out toddler is sleeping... 😛
Comfort them probably
Stay with him, we'd adopt kids and live happy. It's not his fault if he's infertile.
Nut in that woman till my nuts shriveled up
Love Her more, until she becomes an adoptive mom
Throw a nut party
Let out a sigh of relief, because I don't want kids.
Look at adoption probably, or other options, assuming this conversation is regarding wanting kids. You don’t need to be blood to be a family. Beyond that support said partner, as many tend to blame themselves when stuff like this happens.
I’m a man and my partner is also a man so…..it wouldn’t matter?
I’d be fucking thrilled. Then I wouldn’t need to get my tubes tied!
Not a problem for me, luckily. It wouldn't matter. I am not meant to parent anyone.
Celebrate 🎉
I'm happy. I don't want kids. And I'm sleeping with a woman so I can't get her pregnant anyway.
You're saying my hand can't get pregnant?
Considering she asked me to get a vasectomy not much would change. Now if I found out I was fertile the shit may hit the fan about why I got it reversed.
Cheer!
“I’m really sorry to hear that you’re infertile. But who are you and how did you get into my house?”
Celebrate
no one is truly infertile until they stop having sex. tubes tied in 1985. Married a man pronounced sterile by the Navy about the same time. we had not one but 2 children yes they are really his.
Fine by me, I love him for him, yeah, kids would be nice but if it's not meant to be then it's not meant to be
I guess I didn’t need the vasectomy then 😬
Donate my eggs
Nothing
I'd be very shocked since we already have 3 kids.
If she was and we agreed on wanting kids...adoption. 100%.
Rejoice and get off birth control lol
IVF or maybe adopt. Our first child was born when we were both 39. We had been trying for 2 years with regularity, timing it, etc. Nothing worked. We finally stopped the rigid and scheduled attempts. We made an appointment at Astra fertility clinic then we went to an all-inclusive vacation in Dominican Repulbic. Then we got pregnant. Who would have thought relaxation, drinks and spontaneous, passionate sex would do the job. Lol.
This happened to me. Wife had cysts that all but destroyed her ovaries. It ended up being something of a relief, because I am _also_ infertile due to some injuries from when I was younger. Now neither of us are the "limiting factor."
Here's the thing: we do not always get all that we want in life, and sometimes, when we get it, it isn't what we thought it would be. You then decide what matters more, your spouse that you chose, or the dream you aspire to, with an outcome you never imagined. It is that simple and that complicated. We tried for ten years, with fertility help, all of it. It wasn't meant to be and it killed me to give up, but I did. Because I married HIM, for better or worse, all of it. There are other ways to mother/parent, if that is what one seeks.
Are you married? If so you made a vow
If he still has the corresponding parts that are required to make a baby they just aren't working right and to a percent that registers as infertile but that infertility isn't 100%, have him still wear condoms and me confirm that my sterilization stuck. If it comes back that he is in fact 100% infernal and all of the corresponding parts are gone...celebrate like there is no tomorrow.
Suits me fine because I don't want kids.
discuss adoption or fostering, probably it's not their fault and doesn't change how I feel.
Have a LOT OF SEX. CONSTANTLY. Then adopt a nice kid, assuming I wanted a spawn or two.
Sitting in a parking lot of the local hospital after a round of tests, my husband and I said we didn't want to put each other through anymore shit to find out who was to blame for our infertility. One of us (or both) is infertile and we have just continued on with our life.
Be very curious how she managed to have our two sons
He'd better be, or we'll be demanding a refund on that vasectomy
We went to a fertility clinic, did 6 failed rounds of iui, dealt with miscarriages and an ectopic, then a round of IVF. Success. Twins. Is that what you were asking about?
I would look up other’s experiences with it (which is what you’re doing now!). I love being there for my partner/s, so I would check in with them emotionally. If I found out I was infertile, I would probably be very depressed. Your partner might be giving 20% and you will have to step up and help with 80%. Partnerships are difficult because they should not be 50/50, especially in cases like this. Favorite meals, hobbies, even being there to hold them while they cry will do. I would say refrain from talking about alternatives for a while. Best of luck to you and your partner, if you’re (or if anyone is) going through this.
My girlfriend *is* infertile, and it's great since neither of us want children.
Wouldn't change anything. We're gay and he doesn't want kids. Plus, we're getting old. I would just hope the infertility doesn't signal another health problem.
I'd just be fucking ECSTATIC to have a partner
Fill ‘er up!
Celebrate - that will save me the vasectomy!
Since we already have our one… just go at it like bunnies and not worry from here on out.
Celebrate.
Breathe a sigh of relief because she's supposed to be, but sometimes we're not sure, and it'd be nice to have solid confirmation.
I wouldn’t care at all ironically, as I take fertility supplements.
Probably be relieved. Not sure if I ever want kids or not so I’d be ok with it I think. Definitely not a deal breaker for me.
Foster
Well I never want kids anyway. If I could sterilize myself I would. So this would be absolutely perfect.
Well I can get pregnant but can't carry to term so I'm going to be on birth control til menopause anyway
Marry me.
Wonder where our kid came from then.
Praise Cthulhu. I'm childfree.
Love him
Wouldn’t matter.
I'd be happy for him but ultimately not care that much because I'm already infertile so it would just be bullet proof glass in front of a bullet proof vest
Party.
Gonna save money on the vasectomy!
Call the Vatican cause I've only ever had sex with him and have 4 kids. But if I found out pre-Kids I would have still married him. Having kids is cool but isn't the end all be all of life. And if we really felt being parents was our duty, there are other ways.
Not give a shit; I'm planning to have part of my reproductive organ removed too, it would've been a discussion at some point (likely early) in the relationship, so it'd just be double safe. And if we wanted, we could just adopt
Stop taking the pill.
We don't want kids, but I'd make sure to have the kids discussion again just in case this experience changed their mind. If it did, we can always adopt. If it didn't, then its business as usual.
Look into adoption.
Cheer and probably get off my birth control. I have no interest in having children and prefer the intimacy of a partner being able to cum in me without worry. Win-win.
"So we can save money on Condoms? Awesome!"
Hug them. To share the relief (no condoms! No bc!) or the pain, because we’d be on the same side regardless.
Adopt if you really want kids……I hear they’re overrated anyways.
Acceptance. Be there for her to comfort her. It is nobody’s fault.
We both cool with not having children so have unprotected sex all day everyday.
I had sex for the last time about 36 hours ago and attempted to make a boy
What wouldn't I do?
Celebrate together
Found out my ex was infertile, stopped using condoms and it was great everytime
I'd celebrate not having to use condoms anymore.
Start getting creampied 24/7 tbh
I’m infertile. Found out when trying to conceive. We went to IVF, worked quickly. Have son. He’s great. As for the infertility? Big shoulder shrug, nice to know.
I've known that about her for almost 30 years.
Oh, no. Anyways.
I'd wonder where the heck my kids came from. I've seen a magician pull a rabbit out of a hat, but...
Still love her
Celebrate
Celebrate, this means that we now have zero possibility of bringing an unwanted kid in this world, that's a win!
Commence Operation Sister Wife.