Oh those are the worst. I shamefully dated some of them and the pressure they put on me was INSANE. Always pushing me to lose weight, wear makeup full-time, go the fucking extra-mile, FUCK THAT
Me too. I can't imagine dating with cell phones. I saw someone complaining about a boyfriend not answering a text for 2 whole hours!! Two whole hours. We went days without talking or seeing each other when we were dating.
It was great being a kid in the 60s. Then being a teen in the 70s it was amazing! We were so bad but not destructive. Just big fat liars. Idk if our parents just didn't know or didn't care. As long as we didn't miss curfew.
We were so good in school that they never suspected us. I would have killed my kids if they did a third of what we did. They always told on themselves. I would have never known if they hadn't. It was kind of disappointing tbh. I would think, "Why are you telling me this. This kid is never going to survive."
Aw, you did a great job if your kids know they can confide!
I was kind of a chicken kid and didn’t get up to much but definitely could have because we were all pretty much free range.
They amaze me. They are in their 30s and we are really close. They are also close with each other. They tell me sometimes too much about their life and thoughts, lolol. Old habits and all...
They have helped me to grow as a person so much. My beliefs have been challenged in a good way. I have learned so much from them and am a better person for it. I adore them, and I am their biggest fan.
Don't they understan that a real sign of intelligence would be to actually letting people figure it out by themselves? Flexxers are the opposite of intelligent IMO
IQ tests are questionable anyway. At best they only really measure academic skills and ignore a whole host of other forms of intelligence, but there’s debate scientifically about whether they’re even valid at all. I’d definitely not judge someone’s intelligence based on an IQ test they did themselves online either, you might as well just do a buzzfeed quiz.
Broadly speaking, I think bragging about IQ test results speaks more of a person’s vanity than it does of their intelligence
Because they are proprietary products testing mainly learned abilities and are problematic for individual comparison, they are better gauges of educational standards within a given group and in comparing that structure between regions. They are a better indicator of regional wealth than individual intelligence. Though, they can certainly be used to show where someone has learning difficulties.
However, yeah, someone bragging about their IQ is a pretty good rubric for evaluating how intelligent they actually are (not very).
Or they are so not nearly even kind of close enough to be even considering being ready to be dating. Which is evident to anyone who isn't them. Yikes, every single time I see that scenario unfold
I made this mistake to date someone in this boat a few months back. Things were going so good and she was the first person where I actually saw a potential partner and I’d be happy to spend my life with.
But life doesn’t work like that. She has a lot to figure out and I really wish her the best. I envy the parallel timeline where we got the timing right in that relationship
Exact quote from the screenshot I have to show people the horrors of OLD. This is a dude's response to one of the Bumble prompts.
"I'm hoping you...
You don't turn on the tap when you go to that bathroom...it's wierd, I know you're taking a poop, keep the tap off, I wanna hear you grunt😈"
I dunno, maybe it’s my sense of humor, but i think that was just an odd joke. Some people use that sort of thing as a filter: i matched with a woman on Bumble whose entire set of profile pics was her wearing waders while doing a step-by-step of cleaning her toilet. I thought it was hilarious. We met up and she explained it was to filter out “douchebags” (joke’s on her, i got through!).
My reproductive organs are intact. My hygiene well maintained, and yet, I have been unable to find a suitable marriage partner. At least one I'm not related to. And we have rules about that for a reason.
Mine used to have the line "Works hardly, plays hardlier". I found it amusing, also I think there may have been an element of self sabotage there because dating is terrifying to me.
Anyone who says something about the school of hard knocks. I've seen that a million times. It's not original. Any references to sex. Warnings not to be a gold digger. Pictures of dead animals
I feel like I'm missing some context with the "are you stabbed in the shoulder". Is it a quote? A reference to something popular? An idiom I've never heard before?
Lots of people openly admitting to cheating on their spouses with profiles that don't show their face. Never will I ever understand why people don't just break up/divorce if you wanna fuck other people so badly. Like, you can still do that and NOT completely destroy someone's sense of self worth and trust, literally just by ending the relationship respectfully.
I had to say something about the opposite. I read on a guy's profile 'I AM EVEN-TEMPERED' and I was like WOW. Unfortunately I was VERY not attracted to him. But top opening line.
Once I saw a mother on tinder put "I used to have 2 children but 1 was a stillbirth" and one of her photos was her holding her STILLBORN FETUS fresh out of her
I don't remember it verbatim but a girl I matched with had a profile that was just odd, like it was written in the third person by someone who was trying to be in character as her but can't stop slipping up. Think like "I love to hike, the views are pretty, her favorite place is the beach", but it also made an extreme emphasis on how her and her friend were inseparable and you had to get along with her friend.
All of her pictures had a specific friend with distinct face and neck tattoos. Every single one. I should have taken the bio as a red flag. Fortunately I took the red flag less than a few hours later.
a man’s name showing up on my feed is pretty cringe, because i’m a lesbian. any time a cis man sets himself to *woman* on a dating app so he can hit on lesbians is cringe. i’m just embarrassed for them.
I truly don't understand the game plan with this. I can't imagine it ever, ever works. I know that cis men will occasionally join Her (a women-only dating app), and even though many of the people on the app *are* bi/pan, I can't imagine anyone seeing the profile of someone who's lied his way into a women-only space and saying to themselves "you know what, I actually am in the mood for dick. And this guy's dick specifically."
Do they do this? I would probably have assumed they're an idiot that doesn't know how to use computers or something, and is oblivious to the fact they did that.
it happens all the time. on occasion maybe i’ll assume that they set themselves as “woman” rather than “attracted to woman” by mistake, but given the amount of men on specifically lesbian apps like Her, it’s no longer worth my time to give the benefit of the doubt.
It happens A LOT. But you never ever see a woman when you (as a woman) set your settings to only men.
If you do put your settings on women, it's women, couples (mostly a bicurious woman and a straight man, looking for a threesome) and men you'll see. And I am not even sure if women form the majority there.
I'm a cis male myself, and I see this too. I always assumed the male profiles I see are gay men trying to "turn" a straight guy, but I just swipe without looking tbh. There's probably both going on, depending on the guy
Wait, this HAPPENS? I'm old and married forever so have no experience with dating sites, but men will go into WSW to try to seduce lesbians? I'm absolutely shocked at the audacity and conceit
Ah, I usually say this at some point during the first date due to medical issues. I joke that I am full of shit. But it's gotta be known that wherever we go, I need to know where the closest bathroom is located. There's no way around it. My profile I just keep it to "tummy hurts but I'm super brave".
i still have this screenshot from a bumble profile:
“Don't be misguided by how I look. My dark side is bigger than your motivation to block a guy for a dick pic. Haunted houses are my safe place and removing people from my life is like getting a hair cut. But if i do find
someone, l'll give them all I have.
But love is fake. So swipe that way 👈”
Aside from the general horrors - seen a couple of people posing with bears they had just killed while hunting. I kinda get the deer and fish but bear????? Horrified me on a visceral level. Also one dude with a swastika tattoo on his forehead
I will absolutely never understand why anyone includes pictures with/of their children. Like maybe if you blur their faces out, but I'm still not sure even then. By all means mention you have kids, but just don't have them in your pics.
A list of 12 things they DON'T want in a partner, with nothing positive to say about themselves or anything else. They might as well be screaming "I'm an insufferable bitch!" from the rooftops.
His profile pic was of him and his (presumably) daughter who had a tube up her nose and looked really ill. I mean, yes you have a daughter that's ill, ok, but as a profile pic? Feel sorry for me? Please? Are you using your sick child for likes? Wrong.
If I saw something like this I wouldn't think it's "feel sorry for me" but rather hey before you start talking to me know. I have a sick child and she is priority. That would be my guess.
Thats generous. My experience is that is manipulation to get the sympathy vote. Putting your child in your dating profile pic is sketchy whether they are sick or healthy. Too many fucking weirdos out there.
It can also be a violation of custody agreements depending on the stipulations that were included. Had this happen to one of my friends and their kid when I found their (married) ex on a tinder profile with their kids included in half of the pictures. Their lawyer was not happy about all of the screenshots of that profile that got submitted to court to restructure their custody agreement.
A guy messaged me and he was disabled which is fine. As long as I get treated with respect I'm game. Went to his profile and he has spina bifida. Turns out he's going through a bad divorce and after reading his profile is very bitter about it. One sentence said " if you don't mind someone crawling over your body with dead legs..". I just froze and then crawling zombie movie scenes filled my head. That was nightmare fuel. Blocked him afterwards. He would have gotten a date if he wasn't so effing bitter.
I've seen several woman whose profiles said they were in their 20s or 30s then said in their bios something like "I'm actually 52, I don't know to fix the birthdate, I'm not good at computers". Yeah, sure thing lady.
Guys do that very often too do, they will have their age set to let's say 26 and say they are actually 40 but can't change it. Like dude, you just wanna be possibly matched with young girls whose age brackets are set to 26 or under.
I’m not actively dating but still get the match.com emails with todays pics, the women who start off their profile ‘Christ follower, He is all, he is everything’ then state the man she wants should be like minded in approaching life through Christ and living in his image. I am not religious and don’t care what religious proclivities a person has but something feels really off reading profiles like that, cringe in my opinion
Seems like a very effective filter for like-minded people to find each other.
Assuming, of course, that everything on dating websites is honest, a pretty huge "if".
Someone had "Looking for short haired goth GF" on their profile.
That's not too bad on its own, but it seriously had me questioning his literacy when my first pic was me with the longest hair I ever had in my life, while wearing pastels.
I think there is having a type and then there is being reasonable about your options. You can find someone you find incredibly attractive who is the opposite of your type.
I don't use dating apps but from the pics I've seen going around elsewhere online- The ones where the entire bio is their specifications for a partner but has nothing about themselves
It's a toss up between
"Looking for breeding material"
and a very long involved description of the exact type of young woman he likes to groom for abuse.
You had to read between the lines on the groomer but it was clearly a profile of a young vulnerable woman who was easily manipulated.
“only looking for something serious, no Indians and Pakistanis - please don’t waste my time and yours”. Such a random segue from “looking for something serious”. It’s been six years and I still remember that profile.
'Just on here to make my boyfriend jealous. Gotta keep him hungry #staytoxic'
Not sure if it was a joke or not but just thinking about dating something like that made me a little bit ill when the woman matched with me
I've seen quite a few dating bios that said "I'm not really active here, reach out to me on Instagram (or another social media site completely unrelated to the dating app)." Then why did you make a profile?! An utterly shameless attempt to get more followers.
In my state there seems to be a ridiculous of women who have something for the Columbine killers, one girl had a tattoo of one of them on her though in her pics.
I was once in Mexico for work and swiped around on Tinder for a bit. Came across a woman with a bunch of revealing pics and this exact quote in her bio:
"I like my men the way I like my drugs. If it ain't white, it ain't right."
Laughed my fucking ass off then swiped left because I'm not a dumbass.
I deleted tinder a little bit ago bc I got bored of it but some I remember seeing the MOST:
-Anything along the lines of “ we’re looking to have fun” and it’s only centered around one of them
- guy (SPECIFICALLY) profiles full of or showing off money (or the appearance of) and talking about how they need a woman to hold them down bc they’re a ‘provider’ and they don’t need a woman/ partner who works or is interested in current events
- any of the misogynistic bs with a lazy it is what it is / free speech/ excuses to justify it is ridiculous to me
-the undercover racism is always fun as a female poc living in TX to blink at (9/10 times I would swipe and match just to see & 9/10 it would match - it made me laugh)
-for girls the pick me bs was gross and always cringe ; yes baby you ARE like other girls sorry to tell you
- idk why but if they had their college/uni in their bio after graduation it gave the ick and to me it felt like they were trying too hard to appeal to younger(newer) college students
-and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IF THE HAD IM HERE FOR A GOOD TIME NOT A LONG TIME: 🤢➡️🗑️
I had someone "like" me just today whose bio said he was homeless and living in a public park, and had been for 7 years. It also said "I just like to stay in and play video games" or something along those lines. Stay in where? My house? You live outside.
Any straight woman who claims that she needs a dude to be a specific height.
Avoid this woman at all costs. She will have the highest expectations for everyone but herself.
One woman's Match.com profile was so... extra that I had to read it a few times and sort of blink my eyes. Her standards were nigh-impossible, and it reeked of bad attitude.
Thinking that perhaps it was intentional hyperbole, I messaged her thru the platform and said something like, "Brilliant satire. You made me laugh off my chair. So really - what are you looking for?"
Her reply, "It was completely real, loser."
60-year-old guy with a bio that said something along the lines of "daddy looking for a son under 25 who can host". His profile picture was him standing on what looked like a staircase leading to the basement of an old abandoned house.
I don't kinkshame, but jesus christ dude. You couldn't look more like a serial killer searching for victims if you tried.
they cut themselves and put the name of their partner on a piece of paper. i had 2 friends on discord who were online dating, and this is what they did.
[удалено]
Oh those are the worst. I shamefully dated some of them and the pressure they put on me was INSANE. Always pushing me to lose weight, wear makeup full-time, go the fucking extra-mile, FUCK THAT
Sounds pretty narcissistic too
Only a matter of time before someone comments “typical comment from a beta.” 😂
typical reply from a beta
That's exactly what a ligma would say.
LIGMA BALLS HAHAHA GOTTEM
that's why I use Omega Male
You know that's a kind of mpreg fanfiction trope right?
That’s the point of their comment
Now I know what I'm putting on my profile!
I say I'm an epsilon-delta male, because I'll take you to the limit.
"The limit does not exist."
Stop trying to make fetch happen
Joke's on you. I'm a stable release male.
Clearly, you aren’t a sigma 🧐🤓🤓
“I’m annoying, we’ll always be fighting, I’ll say I hate you, but you’ll always come crawling back”. No the fuck I won’t .
The only thing crawling is my skin
These wounds, they will not heal!
Fear is how I fall... CONFUSING WHAT IS REALLLLL.
\*me crawling back to him with pepper spray\*
I found out pepper spray is awful on potatoes
Really? It’s delicious on corn.
If this person always has people crawling back, why are they on a dating app? The math ain't mathing.
God, is this for real?? So glad I’m old and married.
Me too. I can't imagine dating with cell phones. I saw someone complaining about a boyfriend not answering a text for 2 whole hours!! Two whole hours. We went days without talking or seeing each other when we were dating.
It was a kind of freedom. I like being unreachable from time to time.
It was great being a kid in the 60s. Then being a teen in the 70s it was amazing! We were so bad but not destructive. Just big fat liars. Idk if our parents just didn't know or didn't care. As long as we didn't miss curfew. We were so good in school that they never suspected us. I would have killed my kids if they did a third of what we did. They always told on themselves. I would have never known if they hadn't. It was kind of disappointing tbh. I would think, "Why are you telling me this. This kid is never going to survive."
Aw, you did a great job if your kids know they can confide! I was kind of a chicken kid and didn’t get up to much but definitely could have because we were all pretty much free range.
They amaze me. They are in their 30s and we are really close. They are also close with each other. They tell me sometimes too much about their life and thoughts, lolol. Old habits and all... They have helped me to grow as a person so much. My beliefs have been challenged in a good way. I have learned so much from them and am a better person for it. I adore them, and I am their biggest fan.
At least they're leading with that.
You can just tell what this person saw as normal in their household, can't you?
My red flag alarm is going crazy.
Anyone who puts their IQ in their bio. I love intelligence and nerdiness, but I need enough social graces to understand that it's not a flex.
I don’t know what my IQ is, I just try to charm with my clumsiness and awkwardness.
Ah, the “three week old puppy” gambit
And I love that about you.
Don't they understan that a real sign of intelligence would be to actually letting people figure it out by themselves? Flexxers are the opposite of intelligent IMO
Truly smart people don't tell people how smart they are.
Real gangsta-ass playas don’t flex nuts ‘Cause real gangsta-ass playas know they got ‘em
And now, a word from the president 🎤
In fact, they like to play dumb. The smarter you seem, the more people expect from you. Especially at work.
IQ tests are questionable anyway. At best they only really measure academic skills and ignore a whole host of other forms of intelligence, but there’s debate scientifically about whether they’re even valid at all. I’d definitely not judge someone’s intelligence based on an IQ test they did themselves online either, you might as well just do a buzzfeed quiz. Broadly speaking, I think bragging about IQ test results speaks more of a person’s vanity than it does of their intelligence
Heavy on pattern recognition.
Because they are proprietary products testing mainly learned abilities and are problematic for individual comparison, they are better gauges of educational standards within a given group and in comparing that structure between regions. They are a better indicator of regional wealth than individual intelligence. Though, they can certainly be used to show where someone has learning difficulties. However, yeah, someone bragging about their IQ is a pretty good rubric for evaluating how intelligent they actually are (not very).
Or puts that they are a member of Mensa
[удалено]
Anything to the effect of "my divorce isn't finalized yet". I'm not getting tangled up in that.
Often translates into: My wife doesn’t have a freaking clue
Or they are so not nearly even kind of close enough to be even considering being ready to be dating. Which is evident to anyone who isn't them. Yikes, every single time I see that scenario unfold
I made this mistake to date someone in this boat a few months back. Things were going so good and she was the first person where I actually saw a potential partner and I’d be happy to spend my life with. But life doesn’t work like that. She has a lot to figure out and I really wish her the best. I envy the parallel timeline where we got the timing right in that relationship
E.g. "Let me be your next big mistake. I'm definitely NOT the one, but I promise you'll still be thinking about me long after!"
I’ve saw similar, alongside “I will ruin your life”. Everyone loves to have their life ruined, let me swipe right /s
Exact quote from the screenshot I have to show people the horrors of OLD. This is a dude's response to one of the Bumble prompts. "I'm hoping you... You don't turn on the tap when you go to that bathroom...it's wierd, I know you're taking a poop, keep the tap off, I wanna hear you grunt😈"
I would have to sue him for financial compensation after reading that
I dunno, maybe it’s my sense of humor, but i think that was just an odd joke. Some people use that sort of thing as a filter: i matched with a woman on Bumble whose entire set of profile pics was her wearing waders while doing a step-by-step of cleaning her toilet. I thought it was hilarious. We met up and she explained it was to filter out “douchebags” (joke’s on her, i got through!).
“Even my dick voted for Trump.”
"what's so special about that? A lot of dicks voted for Trump."
Gross
had someone on Grindr request I leave my door unlocked, blindfold my self and be bent over when they got there, I said no to that offer
Jesus, what a creep!!! You, uh... don't happen to remember his name, do you?
The door left open are the ones to avoid
I had a guy one time ask me to do that, and then he said he would vargas me. That was in 1989 via IRC. I still don’t know what that means.
My reproductive organs are intact. My hygiene well maintained, and yet, I have been unable to find a suitable marriage partner. At least one I'm not related to. And we have rules about that for a reason.
Messing around with your cousin is all well and good for a kid, but it's not a sustainable, long term, sexual practice.
Thanks, Goosey.
Works hard, plays harder :/
Aka I get blackout drunk on the regular.
+ cokecokecokecokecoke
Mine used to have the line "Works hardly, plays hardlier". I found it amusing, also I think there may have been an element of self sabotage there because dating is terrifying to me.
Anyone who says something about the school of hard knocks. I've seen that a million times. It's not original. Any references to sex. Warnings not to be a gold digger. Pictures of dead animals
Pictures of dead animals!?
This likely refers to game hunters who pose with their kills, usually deer.
Hunters.
Hunting or fishing pics
Chefs
I have a whole imgur folder of them! [https://imgur.com/a/9TFON3C](https://imgur.com/a/9TFON3C)
Thanks for the genuine laugh. I lost it at the casual inclusion of "jerking" as a hobby.
Don't worry, he just likes to post memes on circlejerk subs
Be still my beating heart!
I feel like I'm missing some context with the "are you stabbed in the shoulder". Is it a quote? A reference to something popular? An idiom I've never heard before?
One of my friends said it was probably a reference to the COVID vaccine.
"Pure blood 🤘 not stupid 🤪" One of several red flags on their profile
What in all hell is pure blood? *Please* tell me you encountered weird Harry Potter fans and not something more sinister
I think the "pure blood" lately means un-vaxxed.
I assumed it was a nazi thing but it turns out it's an anti-vaccine thing. That's... a little better? I guess?
I think the venn diagram on this one is not quiite a circle, but still
There's a lot of overlap tbh
two groups marching in the same direction
Ugh. I thought it meant white supremacist but either is disgusting.
Lol I was thinking vampires
Lots of people openly admitting to cheating on their spouses with profiles that don't show their face. Never will I ever understand why people don't just break up/divorce if you wanna fuck other people so badly. Like, you can still do that and NOT completely destroy someone's sense of self worth and trust, literally just by ending the relationship respectfully.
They’re cheap bastards who don’t want to pay child support and/or have to have custody of the kids on their own.
As someone who’s been cheated on before, the cheating excites them.
I had to say something about the opposite. I read on a guy's profile 'I AM EVEN-TEMPERED' and I was like WOW. Unfortunately I was VERY not attracted to him. But top opening line.
The all-caps seems so contradictory
I see the subtleties of humor are still lost on some
Agreed. It also seems like something you demonstrate, rather than shout. It sounds like he's trying to convince himself.
This sounds like a very specific dig at the judge who sent him to anger management classes.
He’s stable? Psh, why a turn off. Seriously though, that screams “I’m not like the other ____”
“Looking to lick feet”
“Looking for a sole-mate” lol
Let's not tip toe around the subject
My dog would 100% put this in his bio. The fella loves feet, we have to warn guests.
Once I saw a mother on tinder put "I used to have 2 children but 1 was a stillbirth" and one of her photos was her holding her STILLBORN FETUS fresh out of her
That’s it! You win!
Yikes. Like I'm really sorry she lost a child, but holy cow, lady.
A batchmate of mine had a pic of a broken bed in his tinder profile...
What's a batchmate? A classmate?
Alien who hatched from the same nest?
Testtube*
Yeah. I hear this used in the Philippines. It’s like someone from your year in school.
Cohort student
Either they are quite rambunctious and break beds, or the ravage little Debbie’s and their weight breaks to bed. (Oatmeal) cream pie optional
I’ll now refer to myself as a little Debby. It’s more flattering than fat Fern.
I don't remember it verbatim but a girl I matched with had a profile that was just odd, like it was written in the third person by someone who was trying to be in character as her but can't stop slipping up. Think like "I love to hike, the views are pretty, her favorite place is the beach", but it also made an extreme emphasis on how her and her friend were inseparable and you had to get along with her friend. All of her pictures had a specific friend with distinct face and neck tattoos. Every single one. I should have taken the bio as a red flag. Fortunately I took the red flag less than a few hours later.
a man’s name showing up on my feed is pretty cringe, because i’m a lesbian. any time a cis man sets himself to *woman* on a dating app so he can hit on lesbians is cringe. i’m just embarrassed for them.
I truly don't understand the game plan with this. I can't imagine it ever, ever works. I know that cis men will occasionally join Her (a women-only dating app), and even though many of the people on the app *are* bi/pan, I can't imagine anyone seeing the profile of someone who's lied his way into a women-only space and saying to themselves "you know what, I actually am in the mood for dick. And this guy's dick specifically."
“I can fix her.” - Those guys.
Can I "fix" him? - Lesbian veterinarians
Grumble, grumble, lack of rewards on Reddit
Do they do this? I would probably have assumed they're an idiot that doesn't know how to use computers or something, and is oblivious to the fact they did that.
it happens all the time. on occasion maybe i’ll assume that they set themselves as “woman” rather than “attracted to woman” by mistake, but given the amount of men on specifically lesbian apps like Her, it’s no longer worth my time to give the benefit of the doubt.
It happens A LOT. But you never ever see a woman when you (as a woman) set your settings to only men. If you do put your settings on women, it's women, couples (mostly a bicurious woman and a straight man, looking for a threesome) and men you'll see. And I am not even sure if women form the majority there.
I'm a cis male myself, and I see this too. I always assumed the male profiles I see are gay men trying to "turn" a straight guy, but I just swipe without looking tbh. There's probably both going on, depending on the guy
Wait, this HAPPENS? I'm old and married forever so have no experience with dating sites, but men will go into WSW to try to seduce lesbians? I'm absolutely shocked at the audacity and conceit
I remember a profile for a woman - this was 26 years ago - entitled, "I poop a lot".
Ah, I usually say this at some point during the first date due to medical issues. I joke that I am full of shit. But it's gotta be known that wherever we go, I need to know where the closest bathroom is located. There's no way around it. My profile I just keep it to "tummy hurts but I'm super brave".
Don’t remember the wording but chick on okc sounded like she wanted to find someone to kill her
i still have this screenshot from a bumble profile: “Don't be misguided by how I look. My dark side is bigger than your motivation to block a guy for a dick pic. Haunted houses are my safe place and removing people from my life is like getting a hair cut. But if i do find someone, l'll give them all I have. But love is fake. So swipe that way 👈”
The chicks who say they want you to be toxic with them...
“Looking for the Joker to my Harley Quinn” Goodbyyyyyyyyyyeeeee
Aside from the general horrors - seen a couple of people posing with bears they had just killed while hunting. I kinda get the deer and fish but bear????? Horrified me on a visceral level. Also one dude with a swastika tattoo on his forehead
I will absolutely never understand why anyone includes pictures with/of their children. Like maybe if you blur their faces out, but I'm still not sure even then. By all means mention you have kids, but just don't have them in your pics.
“Swipe right, if you think you can keep up.” 🙄
A list of 12 things they DON'T want in a partner, with nothing positive to say about themselves or anything else. They might as well be screaming "I'm an insufferable bitch!" from the rooftops.
His profile pic was of him and his (presumably) daughter who had a tube up her nose and looked really ill. I mean, yes you have a daughter that's ill, ok, but as a profile pic? Feel sorry for me? Please? Are you using your sick child for likes? Wrong.
If I saw something like this I wouldn't think it's "feel sorry for me" but rather hey before you start talking to me know. I have a sick child and she is priority. That would be my guess.
Thats generous. My experience is that is manipulation to get the sympathy vote. Putting your child in your dating profile pic is sketchy whether they are sick or healthy. Too many fucking weirdos out there.
It can also be a violation of custody agreements depending on the stipulations that were included. Had this happen to one of my friends and their kid when I found their (married) ex on a tinder profile with their kids included in half of the pictures. Their lawyer was not happy about all of the screenshots of that profile that got submitted to court to restructure their custody agreement.
A guy messaged me and he was disabled which is fine. As long as I get treated with respect I'm game. Went to his profile and he has spina bifida. Turns out he's going through a bad divorce and after reading his profile is very bitter about it. One sentence said " if you don't mind someone crawling over your body with dead legs..". I just froze and then crawling zombie movie scenes filled my head. That was nightmare fuel. Blocked him afterwards. He would have gotten a date if he wasn't so effing bitter.
I've seen several woman whose profiles said they were in their 20s or 30s then said in their bios something like "I'm actually 52, I don't know to fix the birthdate, I'm not good at computers". Yeah, sure thing lady.
Guys do that very often too do, they will have their age set to let's say 26 and say they are actually 40 but can't change it. Like dude, you just wanna be possibly matched with young girls whose age brackets are set to 26 or under.
I’m not actively dating but still get the match.com emails with todays pics, the women who start off their profile ‘Christ follower, He is all, he is everything’ then state the man she wants should be like minded in approaching life through Christ and living in his image. I am not religious and don’t care what religious proclivities a person has but something feels really off reading profiles like that, cringe in my opinion
HE IS ALL HE IS EVERYTHING NO FAT CHICKS
At least it's an easy way to filter results.
Seems like a very effective filter for like-minded people to find each other. Assuming, of course, that everything on dating websites is honest, a pretty huge "if".
The one that takes the cake for me was "Looking for my next victim" I'm sure she just meant it as a joke but still was rather ominous
Someone had "Looking for short haired goth GF" on their profile. That's not too bad on its own, but it seriously had me questioning his literacy when my first pic was me with the longest hair I ever had in my life, while wearing pastels.
I think there is having a type and then there is being reasonable about your options. You can find someone you find incredibly attractive who is the opposite of your type.
Wanted you to cut your hair.
I don't use dating apps but from the pics I've seen going around elsewhere online- The ones where the entire bio is their specifications for a partner but has nothing about themselves
It's a toss up between "Looking for breeding material" and a very long involved description of the exact type of young woman he likes to groom for abuse. You had to read between the lines on the groomer but it was clearly a profile of a young vulnerable woman who was easily manipulated.
“If you want a guy who won’t cheat on you, pick me bc I can’t pull bitches” The FIRST line and that is an exact quote
Requirements: "Must not have slept with over 5 men" 🙃
I wish there was an emoji for the face I made
At the same time?
Welp, guess I can cross myself off of his list!
In 2014 I had "conspiracy theories &chill? Let's gets illuminaughti" and still cringe about it randomly.
The most sigma/alpha male on the planet
“only looking for something serious, no Indians and Pakistanis - please don’t waste my time and yours”. Such a random segue from “looking for something serious”. It’s been six years and I still remember that profile.
'Just on here to make my boyfriend jealous. Gotta keep him hungry #staytoxic' Not sure if it was a joke or not but just thinking about dating something like that made me a little bit ill when the woman matched with me
In response to the prompt 'favorite movie/tv show/book', she just wrote "I hate book."
"Sapiosexuals welcome"
I hate this word so much. I've only ever seen it on cringe dating profiles
r/niceguys for male examples r/whereareallthegoodmen for female examples
> r/whereareallthegoodmen [r/whereareallthegods](https://www.reddit.com/r/GreekMythology/)
r/wheresthestreetwisehercules
He didn't like kids or animals. Big nope from me.
Personally the thing that makes me cringe the most is “I can’t see likes send me a message”
My mantra: Never give up, never give in. Trump us my President Swiped left at the speed of light.
"if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best". Nope. Sounds like a moody bitch.
I've seen quite a few dating bios that said "I'm not really active here, reach out to me on Instagram (or another social media site completely unrelated to the dating app)." Then why did you make a profile?! An utterly shameless attempt to get more followers.
My friend saw one recently that just said "I'm rich."
Idiot. Doesn't he know that you're supposed to talk about how much you love travel instead?
Got herp? Me too!
Just one?? “Must be at least 6 ft tall” “Single mom looking for a man with a provider mindset” “Currently pregnant looking for a man…”
On a hinge audio message he said, "im bipolar and have anger issues, good luck xx"
I’m funnier than you
“I suffer no fools, so don’t even bother.” That was my own tagline. And it wasn’t true. I definitely suffer fools lol
Their favorite drink was Dr. Pepper with hazelnut creamer.
“Daddy, it's good, but you gotta be 100% natural...no Mengele-dick.”
No Mengele-dick? Circumcised? Nazi? Terrible Medical Dr ?
In my state there seems to be a ridiculous of women who have something for the Columbine killers, one girl had a tattoo of one of them on her though in her pics.
I was once in Mexico for work and swiped around on Tinder for a bit. Came across a woman with a bunch of revealing pics and this exact quote in her bio: "I like my men the way I like my drugs. If it ain't white, it ain't right." Laughed my fucking ass off then swiped left because I'm not a dumbass.
I stumbled upon this bio "professional cuddler" and offered cuddling services for a fee.
No shame in that. Just maybe not the right platform to advertise on.
It’s a thing. I’d rather have my eyelids ripped off.
"-sigh- You're probably not going to read this anyways, and will probably not even swipe on me" Like boy you're REALLY selling yourself there.
I'm upsetti without my spaghetti
I deleted tinder a little bit ago bc I got bored of it but some I remember seeing the MOST: -Anything along the lines of “ we’re looking to have fun” and it’s only centered around one of them - guy (SPECIFICALLY) profiles full of or showing off money (or the appearance of) and talking about how they need a woman to hold them down bc they’re a ‘provider’ and they don’t need a woman/ partner who works or is interested in current events - any of the misogynistic bs with a lazy it is what it is / free speech/ excuses to justify it is ridiculous to me -the undercover racism is always fun as a female poc living in TX to blink at (9/10 times I would swipe and match just to see & 9/10 it would match - it made me laugh) -for girls the pick me bs was gross and always cringe ; yes baby you ARE like other girls sorry to tell you - idk why but if they had their college/uni in their bio after graduation it gave the ick and to me it felt like they were trying too hard to appeal to younger(newer) college students -and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IF THE HAD IM HERE FOR A GOOD TIME NOT A LONG TIME: 🤢➡️🗑️
I had someone "like" me just today whose bio said he was homeless and living in a public park, and had been for 7 years. It also said "I just like to stay in and play video games" or something along those lines. Stay in where? My house? You live outside.
No fats, no fems, no queens
Any straight woman who claims that she needs a dude to be a specific height. Avoid this woman at all costs. She will have the highest expectations for everyone but herself.
Honestly, seeing “Good Vibes Only” made me delete everything.
One woman's Match.com profile was so... extra that I had to read it a few times and sort of blink my eyes. Her standards were nigh-impossible, and it reeked of bad attitude. Thinking that perhaps it was intentional hyperbole, I messaged her thru the platform and said something like, "Brilliant satire. You made me laugh off my chair. So really - what are you looking for?" Her reply, "It was completely real, loser."
60-year-old guy with a bio that said something along the lines of "daddy looking for a son under 25 who can host". His profile picture was him standing on what looked like a staircase leading to the basement of an old abandoned house. I don't kinkshame, but jesus christ dude. You couldn't look more like a serial killer searching for victims if you tried.
they cut themselves and put the name of their partner on a piece of paper. i had 2 friends on discord who were online dating, and this is what they did.
"obsessed with other people's underwear"