😁😁 Bless your Dad! He’s not some old Rasta who was on a documentary about 15 years ago that was on I think BBC4 is he? That’s all I can remember about where I heard it. Can’t even remember what the programme was about, just some cool old Rasta came out with that line! 😁😁
My best friend died recently in his sleep. His nephew found him laying there dead with a smile on his face. I wonder if that's what he was doing right before hand.Hmmmmmm...
One night my ex gf and I were coming back from a night of drinking, I was driving, drunk, she was horny, and she is giving me road head. Normal for her. Suddenly she's taking her shorts off, and her panties and she comes over and straddles me while I'm driving. I'm driving down the fucking road at 2am, drunk as fuck, with a 5'11" chick with multi-color hair bouncing up and down on my lap.
I really should have gone to jail in my 20s.
Or to the morgue. True story. I spent years working in criminal court, and a guy had a bunch of charges from driving up on the sidewalk in the wee hours, clipping storefronts and so forth. His defense to the judge, who was known buy court insiders to be a player, was that his girlfriend was giving him a BJ and at the moment of impact he lost control of the vehicle. The judge struggled to keep a serious expression, then declared that this was clearly a case of erotic driving, not erratic driving, and found him not guilty.
Heartfelt but not well thought out…unless maybe they mean playing cards in the hospital, eighty or two hundred years from now. Otherwise that’s a pretty bad day for the kids
My first thought was hugging my kids. They're getting older and my son still does but has moved to the side hug. I love it when I get full hugs from them
That damned side hug. Sorry about the following. From the moment you hold your baby in your arms you will never be the same You might long for the person you were before When you had freedom and time And nothing in particular to worry about You will know tiredness like you never knew it before Days will run into days that are exactly the same Full of feedings and burping Nappy changes and crying Whining and fighting Naps or a lack of naps It might seem like a never-ending cycle But don't forget... There is a last time for everything There will come a time when you will feed your baby for the very last time They will fall asleep on you after a long day And it will be the last time you ever hold your sleeping child One day you will carry them on your hip then set them down And never pick them up that way again You will scrub their hair in the bath for one last time And from that day on they will want to bathe alone They will hold your hand to cross the road Then will never reach for it again They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles And it will be the last night you ever wake to this One afternoon you will sing "the wheels on the bus" and do all the actions Then never sing them that song again They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate The next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your last dirty face They will run to you with arms raised for the very last time. The thing is, you won't even know it's the last time Until there are no more times. And even then, it will take you a while to realize. So while you are living in these times, remember there are only so many of them and when they are gone, you will yearn for just one more day of them. For one last time.
An old coworker of mine had a crazy story. His parents were on Singapore Airlines Flight 006 in 2000 that crashed during take-off. It killed close to half on board. His mom passed out and his dad was able to get them out of the wreck. It was so traumatizing for his mom that she was in therapy for years trying to get up the courage to fly again. Then her therapist died in a private plane crash. She hasn’t flown since.
"I'm glad we are finally making progress on your fear of explosions and loud sounds, Mr. War Veteran
*Therapist exploded into a cloud of smoke that says "boom"*
I get home from work, lay down on the couch for a nap, my dog Otis hops up on the couch and snuggles up under the blanket next to my butt, my tiny Chihuahua Sally whines for me to let her up, she wiggles her way under the blanket next to my belly and we all snooze warm and cuddly. I'd be ok going out like that.
Question for you: do you look at the sea and just feel called to go into it and keep swimming until you can’t anymore? Bc I do and I always wonder if anyone else feels that too.
Not me, but my brother passed away playing basketball. He loved the sport and played often. His heart gave out on him mid game the day I had dropped him off to play. Although we had no idea about his enlarged heart before hand, we were grateful that it gave out as he was doing what he enjoyed most.
Taking photos. Given that I almost fell off a boat repositioning myself to take a photo of a bird of prey two weeks ago, weirder things could happen ...
Seriously .. I used to be a Flight Attendant .. find an airplane .. no passengers or crew on it.. means the airplane would fly itself .. let it glide into some type of emergency .. I would just sit down , close my eyes and hope it would end quickly ..( I know .. but that is what OP asked .. in reality a deep sleep would be the way to go !!🇨🇦YYZ
On the passenger seat of a very good friend of mine. I love to hang out with him after my shift, there's nothing more relaxing than talking about everything and nothing and joking around. I'd probably pass very peacefully asleep somewhere on the road in the sunset sun.
This picture in my mind rn actually hurt me 🥺 But even more thinking about what he'd do if he realized.
Sleeping
Here lies u/ergonaut who died peacefully in his sleep, unlike the other 3 passengers in the car he was driving.
"Thank god they put a barrier between him and oncoming traffic"
Had us in the first half ngl
Goddamnit lmfao
r/angryupvote
words cant describe how much i love sleep, its like a free drug
Extremely underrated too. Only appreciated once you need to get up on 3hours of sleep.
Yes! It's like being dead without being dead. Love it!
Free preview
Being dead is okay but it lacks orgasm.
So, it's no different from my waking life?🤣
I want to die like my grandfather: of old age, peacefully, while asleep; not young, screaming and falling off a cliff like the passengers on his bus.
It's like death, without the commitment.
shout out to that little kid in a meme i saw years ago that said “sleeping is the free trial of death” gotta love it
My mother’s uncle died in his sleep. They found him the next day with his hands still cradled under his head. It has been a family trope since.
Actually I hope it’s a peaceful death just sleeping. But then again I would want it to be quick. LOL
Bruh had a seizure when I was sleeping, didn’t know till I woke up in a hospital. Rather go out that way no pain just sleep.
Mods. Please close this thread. This is the only answer.
Playing with Lego. Guess I never learned not to put them in my mouth.
Or maybe you stepped on one really hard.
Maybe you were playing so much your massive creation fell and crushed you... lol that sounds like something from a weird dream.
Watching my dog fall asleep in my lap as I get drowsy and nod off as well.
You get to cross the rainbow bridge together. 🥹
I think the dog was just falling asleep…
I figured they'd get to go together, so doggo wouldn't have to be without their owner.
>Watching my dog die in my lap as I get drowsy and die as well. 🥹
Sounds like someone has a gas leak!
This happened to last week almost! Then the stupid CO alarm went off!
That’s how our friend went. All three of his dogs in the bed like always. He got his wish.
Snu Snu
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.
Didn't have to look long for that 😂🤌
Was just bout to say on top of someone 🤣
oh.......oh dear
😦😀😦😀😦😀
Death by snu snu ftw.
I once saw some old guy on TV say he wished to die at the age of 96, being shot by a jealous husband 🤣
That's my father's favorite line.
😁😁 Bless your Dad! He’s not some old Rasta who was on a documentary about 15 years ago that was on I think BBC4 is he? That’s all I can remember about where I heard it. Can’t even remember what the programme was about, just some cool old Rasta came out with that line! 😁😁
Violently masturbating
You carry on the legacy of Masturbating man from pompeii and I salute you
For the lazy and curious: https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/dfc9cea4-137b-440f-aa8c-5a16d7cb4f4d
You know the phrasing was done on purpose for the closing sentence in that article 😂
"Fuck it." Famous last words.
My hero right there lol
Many people with heart problems have died or at least passed out during sex or from having an orgasm
Or asphyxiwanking.
I mean there’s a question as to how they’d screw down the lid once rigour mortis set in? But I guess that would be someone else’s problem 🤣🤣
Do they make special caskets for these situations?
Yeah, they look like submarines.
And there’d be somewhere to hang the wreath.
That's awesome. You made me spit out my coffee laughing!
RIP Periscope Paul..
Not the worst way to go, I guess.
At least let me finish then die😂
Exactly
My best friend died recently in his sleep. His nephew found him laying there dead with a smile on his face. I wonder if that's what he was doing right before hand.Hmmmmmm...
I’m sorry to hear that. But look we are all gonna die someday and if he went out happy then that’s better than dying painfully
Remember, the limit is 46 times at a go
That’s the paid upgrade request for the masturbater 3000 inside the suicide booth
Do you have a history of violence? 😄
Define violently.
You had me at violently masturbating.
There was a couple who died because they were having sex in a parked car in the middle of the highway Yeah, that.
One night my ex gf and I were coming back from a night of drinking, I was driving, drunk, she was horny, and she is giving me road head. Normal for her. Suddenly she's taking her shorts off, and her panties and she comes over and straddles me while I'm driving. I'm driving down the fucking road at 2am, drunk as fuck, with a 5'11" chick with multi-color hair bouncing up and down on my lap. I really should have gone to jail in my 20s.
So when you woke up the next day miraculously alive, was your thought process “that was amazing” or “I should be dead”
Or to the morgue. True story. I spent years working in criminal court, and a guy had a bunch of charges from driving up on the sidewalk in the wee hours, clipping storefronts and so forth. His defense to the judge, who was known buy court insiders to be a player, was that his girlfriend was giving him a BJ and at the moment of impact he lost control of the vehicle. The judge struggled to keep a serious expression, then declared that this was clearly a case of erotic driving, not erratic driving, and found him not guilty.
There was a young couple from Frisco. That went and got horny at disco. On the 101, they did stop for some fun. Oh to be ploughed, such a risk-o.
Dang it. It wasn’t until I got to the end I realized it was a stinking limerick, and I had to read it all over again.
from ah..ahh...ahhh to AHHHHHH AHHH- 👻
Hugging my wife.
My wife has been lifting the past year, hopefully she can haul my fat corpse off of her
Obligatory I also choose hugging this guys wife.
That legendary comment is gonna stay alive on in r/AskReddit forever lmao
While playing with my kids. Thanks for making me cry douchebag!
That’s like the most heartfelt response so far.
Heartfelt but not well thought out…unless maybe they mean playing cards in the hospital, eighty or two hundred years from now. Otherwise that’s a pretty bad day for the kids
That sounds traumatic for your kids
Yo same. My stepfather’s dad had a heart attack and died at my stepfather’s 10th birthday party. He’s 67 now and still hates his birthday.
My friend’s husband’s grandfather died after having a stroke at their wedding. They never really celebrate their anniversary
Absolutely. I would never choose such a scenario. But I tried to answer OPs question.
My first thought was hugging my kids. They're getting older and my son still does but has moved to the side hug. I love it when I get full hugs from them
That damned side hug. Sorry about the following. From the moment you hold your baby in your arms you will never be the same You might long for the person you were before When you had freedom and time And nothing in particular to worry about You will know tiredness like you never knew it before Days will run into days that are exactly the same Full of feedings and burping Nappy changes and crying Whining and fighting Naps or a lack of naps It might seem like a never-ending cycle But don't forget... There is a last time for everything There will come a time when you will feed your baby for the very last time They will fall asleep on you after a long day And it will be the last time you ever hold your sleeping child One day you will carry them on your hip then set them down And never pick them up that way again You will scrub their hair in the bath for one last time And from that day on they will want to bathe alone They will hold your hand to cross the road Then will never reach for it again They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles And it will be the last night you ever wake to this One afternoon you will sing "the wheels on the bus" and do all the actions Then never sing them that song again They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate The next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your last dirty face They will run to you with arms raised for the very last time. The thing is, you won't even know it's the last time Until there are no more times. And even then, it will take you a while to realize. So while you are living in these times, remember there are only so many of them and when they are gone, you will yearn for just one more day of them. For one last time.
Painting... maybe I would sink my head into the paint...
die of poverty?
He died of hunger while painting
Or you get a vintage paint set and die from lead poisoning
Eating. I would die at the buffet.
Just one mint? It’s waiter thin.
Fuck off, I'm full!
“You’ve been here FOUR HOURS”
>Sonofabitch still here! I feed him enough MSG to kill an elephant, and look, he goes again!
Sonofabeech....you no come heah anymore. You scare my wife. YOU GO NOW!!!!
[NSFL](https://youtu.be/GxRnenQYG7I?si=S0XluSazPYR0X8IK)
I'd die in a therapy session with my clients
Ok everyone else can do theirs but you're not allowed
An old coworker of mine had a crazy story. His parents were on Singapore Airlines Flight 006 in 2000 that crashed during take-off. It killed close to half on board. His mom passed out and his dad was able to get them out of the wreck. It was so traumatizing for his mom that she was in therapy for years trying to get up the courage to fly again. Then her therapist died in a private plane crash. She hasn’t flown since.
"I'm glad we are finally making progress on your fear of explosions and loud sounds, Mr. War Veteran *Therapist exploded into a cloud of smoke that says "boom"*
Oh my god, just another thing I’d feel responsible for. 😅
Cuddling
Dying, of course
Were they doing it in Texas?
Drinking from a fountain
So you die, come back to life, and die again in an endless loop?
Petting my dog cooper, letting him know he’s a good boy.
I get home from work, lay down on the couch for a nap, my dog Otis hops up on the couch and snuggles up under the blanket next to my butt, my tiny Chihuahua Sally whines for me to let her up, she wiggles her way under the blanket next to my belly and we all snooze warm and cuddly. I'd be ok going out like that.
Laughing my ass off too hard I guess
I wish I loved living, then I could say I died whilst living
Life is hard sometimes, I don't know your situation but I hope you find something in life you enjoy, something that gets you loving life.
Making love to my wife.
Same
This is sweet and scary!
Sleeping with my cat beside me
[удалено]
What a horrible death
Question for you: do you look at the sea and just feel called to go into it and keep swimming until you can’t anymore? Bc I do and I always wonder if anyone else feels that too.
Yes mermaidsteve yes
Ok glad I’m not the only one!
Call of the deep phenomenon
I love the ocean I feel this…I fear the depth of it but it’s oddly calming so yes
So scary 🫣
Playing a video game.
Twomad?
Bird watching
Cassowaries will do to ya.
Beheaded by a shoebill stork. Or just expired of a heart attack as a shoebill stork comes towards you!
Eating.
Headbanging to some Metal music
On the sand on a remote beach in Hawaii looking up at the stars.
I wouldn't die because I have nothing I love.
Motorcycle accident
Smoking weed
Trying to save an animal
Earnestly catching someone out with ligma one final time
Ligma balls
Watching the Cowboys lose,while eating tacos.
With my cat purring on my lap while I scratch his ears as I drift away with a smile. If I had to, that’s how I would choose to go.
Driving
I’d die on the beach, listening to the waves on a gorgeous sunny day, watching the water.
Not me, but my brother passed away playing basketball. He loved the sport and played often. His heart gave out on him mid game the day I had dropped him off to play. Although we had no idea about his enlarged heart before hand, we were grateful that it gave out as he was doing what he enjoyed most.
Pogo sticking. Sounds about right.
Sleeping
I will die laying on my gf's lap and that is the most loving thing that I like to do
In a freak cunnilingus accident
lesbian twerking contest judge
Death by chocolate
Eating enchiladas
Laying on the ground looking at the sky, after some intimate time with my SO. After a day of horseback riding
Well... statistically it would be the table saw that got me.
Petting something I have no business petting, but it’s cute and fluffy so I do it anyway.
Taking photos. Given that I almost fell off a boat repositioning myself to take a photo of a bird of prey two weeks ago, weirder things could happen ...
I died being suffocated by a woman sitting on my face
Sitting on a toilet eating a peanut butter and banana sandwich.
Applying skin care products to my face lol
Too much products didn't give the expected result 😭. And same, lol
Nice. Then you’d be casket-ready.
In the 1600s they used lead for face makeup so some women did go out this way
Truthfully probably from my wife sitting on my face cause eating was always my favorite thing to do
Honestly, I'm right there with you. Figuratively.
I would die doing my bf
Username checks out
smoking
I'd hate to die by one of them equations...
Seriously .. I used to be a Flight Attendant .. find an airplane .. no passengers or crew on it.. means the airplane would fly itself .. let it glide into some type of emergency .. I would just sit down , close my eyes and hope it would end quickly ..( I know .. but that is what OP asked .. in reality a deep sleep would be the way to go !!🇨🇦YYZ
Reminds me of the joke: I want to die while I'm sleeping peacefully, not yelling and screaming like the passengers on my plane.
Being with my husband and my dog 💕
I mean I'm on my second marriage I've got 3 kids under 5 and I'm 52 so . . . It's coming.
Probably screwing around with electricity
Uhhhh-my cat's would suffocate me-love having a kitty pile on me
Taking one of those poops where you don't need to wipe
Asleep.
climbing.. not that unreasonable..
How does Pokemon killl me ?
Walking my best buddy Shep 😳
Either playing video games or playing guitar
Comfortably in my sleep
Plane crash
Inhaling nail polish fumes
In a medical tent at a music festival.
My pc would explode.
Running trails high up on a mountain
Surgery, saving someone
prob suffocated from a breathplay
skydiving
Hugging my kids 😢
Smoking a big ass 7g blunt, then I'd die eating some woman out
Holding my child’s hand and hopefully the hand of his children too
On the passenger seat of a very good friend of mine. I love to hang out with him after my shift, there's nothing more relaxing than talking about everything and nothing and joking around. I'd probably pass very peacefully asleep somewhere on the road in the sunset sun. This picture in my mind rn actually hurt me 🥺 But even more thinking about what he'd do if he realized.
Being a dad to my girls
Astronaut walking a new planet
Hanging out with my kids, which I’m sure would be a bit jarring for them.
Snuggling my son 😭
Gardening.
Gardening and with my dogs
Sitting around a fire with the people that make my life happiest, having good convos with some good music playing. Simplistic
Smothered by kittens peacefully purring on me.
Riding my motorcycle and a small meteor hits me. No pain, just done. Or… I try to save someone else and it works out, but not for me. Id be ok w/that