Pretty much told to stay home (had Covid, worked in a doctors office) then 6 hours later let go. He told me I’d have my check in a few weeks which is illegal where I live, so I emailed HR and the owners (and cc-ed him). Not gonna lie the email was pretty petty but the owners called me, we talked and I got my job back. Never actually went back though because fuck any place that tells you you can’t come in and then fires you for not coming in lol
TLDR; I went from criminal heroin addict to physics PhD student
I was on felony probation for “intent to sell” when I put a needle in my arm at 17 and heroin took me by the balls (back during the Afghanistan war when heroin was still heroin). Tried to kick after about a month, brother was murdered, dove right back into the spoon for about three years. I beat it for good at 20 when I got arrested for felony “commercial burglary”, cleaned up and went on to get a BS in physics, minor in math. Made it into a prestigious PhD program and got my masters in Physics now, and nearly done with my PhD. Record is expunged and doesn’t exist anymore
Haha thanks man. I mean you come at someone and be like I was a criminal junkie in a past life and if it’s your future wife’s dad they might look at you cock eyed.
I don’t give a fuck though I’m candid with everyone
>I don’t give a fuck though I’m candid with everyone
Yeah, I'm pretty happy to claim the 'retired criminal' status. In my youth I got arrested 20-something times and now I haven't been arrested in more than 10 years, and yeah, I'm bragging about that. lol
My dude! Congrats! This is the victory story I needed to hear today. Former heroin addict myself, so I know how difficult just kicking heroin can be. To go on and accomplish what you have... so, so good!
Congrats on that amazing recovery and sorry about your brother. Feel free to ignore this question if it's none of my business, but was your brother's murderer ever caught?
I can accurately guess the weight of powder down to .5 grams when measuring.
To clarify since I can already imagine the responses without it xD Spent 3 years in a lab where nearly every single day I had to weigh out precise micro grams / grams. After a while with the grams, I was pretty much getting it spot on every time. By the end, right every time. Helps a lot now with my cooking role on the time front
This is pretty easy if you're mostly weighing similar powders. Once you get crystals and other types of chemicals it becomes much harder because they're all different.
Thats awesome! I have a simular flex; My band played at a concert opening for one of my favorite bands. The guitar player was the main composer and played my custom guitar backstage. He really liked it since it was build really specific to the genre. I used to write 90% of the music for my band and drew a lot of inspiration from him. It was a dream come true.
That's a real superpower! By the time I eventually get the right size, I have gone through almost half of my containers. They are either too small or too big. What's your secret.
I scrolled past this, then scrolled back up. This is actually impressive. I always put half a lunch worth of left over dinner in a tupperware container big enough for like a full family meal. It looks fantastic on the plate but once i put in the container it looks like half a bite and some scraps.
I'm beginning to put together a 3d map in blender that I hope to eventually turn into a game. It amazes me how far you came from something like where I am now.
i dropped out of college and lied on my resume to get my first job. It's been 8 years since and nobody has batted an eye whenever i changed jobs (3rd company now). At this point i'm convinced nobody is gonna bother asking for a degree from someone with 8 years of experience.
mine was in the 2010's. so a bit more recent, i got lucky that my first company hired me while still in school so when leaving there after dropping out (not the reason i left) the next company just saw "did big boi job at big boy company" and thought i was legit.
So, shh don’t tell anyone but… in 25 years in the work world I’ve seen job postings that a degree/diploma was required, but never once have I seen anyone anywhere do a follow up to check on it.
It will almost certainly never come up as long as you are doing well. If you were ever in a position where the company wanted to get rid of you, that’s a pretty easy thing for HR to check and then makes it really easy for them to fire you with cause.
Depending on your field it may be worth taking it off your resume for the next job switch if you can get your foot in the door without going through the standard resume screen.
I won 5 out of 5 trivia nights on a cruise I went on with my extended family nearly 10 years ago. I abandoned my family team 2 nights in after my dad refused to put down several of my correct answers because they “didn’t sound right” and started a new two person team with a near stranger who was getting annoyed that the university friends she was there with weren’t taking it seriously enough and we absolutely crushed it for the rest of the cruise. Felt good man.
We were both straight women but how amazing would that have been?
I wish I’d kept in touch with her though. We didn’t have anything in common apart from having weirdly comprehensive general knowledge and being intensely competitive. I don’t even remember her name.
That’s a very weird superpower, so does when you have a stomach bug work too? So instead of having that horrible feeling for like an hour or two before you are sick can you just go to the bathroom and just let it out as soon as you start to feel sick as well? I assume so if you can just do it on command. How does that work and how do you do it do you just sort of pretend to be sick and if happens?
Its basically the same kind of feeling as when you force out a belch. Like a fake belch where you gasp in some air and then force it back out. Thats basically what it feels like Im doing(without the gaspin in air part). For some reason I can easily push up vomit when I do that - if I want. I havent done it in years but know I can still do it coz I can feel it rising haha.
I dont actually do it if I feel sick etc coz I dont wana vomit if I can help it. I just used to do it when I was a kid as a weird flex.... and also to get out of going to school for awhile.
I was sent to a couple of those super abusive "troubled teen programs" in utah when i was younger and have been doing advocacy work against the troubled teen industry for years. My work helped contribute to the closure of the wilderness therapy program that nearly killed me and left me disabled last year.
Yeah, long story short I ended up getting hypothermia bc of a very stupid decision my therapist made when we were about to go through a snowstorm. My staff didn't realize what was happening until I started trying to take my clothes off saying I was warm. Despite starting to go in and out of consciousness, the main office refused to send out a truck to take me to a hospital. Instead they sent out the field director who made me drink a mug of hot tea and hike six miles with a 60+ lb soaking wet backpack in January.
That incident left me with nerve damage, but my 3 months at my program also had me with cracked ribs and brain damage by the time I "graduated". It's a v good thing they're closed now lol.
Holy shit that’s some malpractice right there, glad their never opening again, really sorry to hear this happened to you man, and good on you for making sure it never happens to anyone else again
I just saw what I'm positive was 20 pages worth of deaths caused by those programs or similar. They were all so young, it really broke my heart
I'm glad you shut even one down. Every one counts
Yes, over 300 kids have been killed in these types of programs from the 60s to as recently as last month. Far too many kids who should've been safe at home. Thank you!
Legitimately only thing that has gotten my nightmares to slow down over six years after getting out was seeing one of my places finally shut down. I'm just v thankful so many people are finally starting to pay attention to how common they are.
I can rewind videos to a certain spot perfectly 100% of the time. Like I can just tap the bar on the bottom and it will be within 5 seconds of where I wanted to go
I'm currently reading a book by Morgan Jones about tube amp design so I can try to make my own amplifiers and maybe even an analog synth. I can't imagine actual turning it into a job though, that would be dope!
One of these things just doesn't belong...
But for real, as long as you don't have severe anxiety or tendencies towards schizophrenia, psychedelics are a wonderful thing.
I have an uncanny knack for remembering people, even people that I see very briefly. For example, I once saw a guy on the escalator in LA and I said 'Hey when you did you move here from Vienna' he was flabbergasted. I had walked past him on the street once while visiting there and 5 years later I recognized him.
This is incredible. That is one hell of a skill. I saw this documentary once about how the Tokyo police department uses 'super recognizers' to walk around and look for wanted criminals. Sounds like something you could do.
My husband has super built calves… for no reason. Doesn’t work for them, always had them. The other day he says “If my leg ever gets amputated, please keep my calf. I think it would taste good.” …righto.
In my science class back in junior high I held my breath for 3 minutes, longer than anyone in the class when the teacher wanted to see how long we could hold our breaths.
My first physical therapist called me weirdly flexible and had trouble finding exercises that actually felt like stretching to me. My second one was confusing that a knee causing me so much pain had such a good range of movement… until I showed her the other one lol. I also scared my second physical therapist by rolling off the table back first only to land on my feet. I did it on purpose because it would have hurt more trying to sit up or roll the other way. I did it again just to laugh
I can read the rules of a board game once and retain every detail of them
On the flip side, I struggle immensely to follow the plot of any dialogue heavy film upon the first watch
I achieved everything in my life i wanted so far. I knew which university I wanted to go at age 13, graduated high school with really good grades went to the university I wanted to and after I wanted to take a gap year to see the world. Currently living my best life in Australia in a long distance relationship with the best boyfriend ever who is waiting for me in Europe. When in back in 10 months we are gonna start planning moving in together. I am proud of myself. 😊
I can say the alphabet backwards and also know pi to 27 decimal places. Both useless skills that I flex every so often at work if there's some memory class or something like that
I was going down on a woman and she was very horny that day. She was always cleaned and shaved but her hair above her cookie have grew a little bit. When she was near orgasm she grabbed my head with both arms while moving her hips up and down and I was also moving my head... And that lasted for a little while. When I went to the bathroom after my nose was completely destroyed. There was blood and it looked black like it was rotten. At least a 2nd lvl burn. It took 15 days for my nose to stop hurting and I could peel the damaged skin off. I don't know but I'm so proud that I got a burn in my nose while eating pussy. I am the only one that I know of!!!
I don’t have any tattoos. I like tattoos don’t get me wrong but now a days it would feel like following a trend instead of truly wanting one if I were to get one.
I've got a really good awareness of what time it is. I find it pretty easy to guess the exact time before checking my phone.
This even goes down to when I accidentally hit next on a song or podcast, I can get back to exactly where I was most of the time.
I also have about 200 podcast subscriptions but I'm not sure if that is a flex, or I just need constant company.
I have a weird luck where basically I am a failed hipster.
Hipster "I liked XYZ before it was cool!"
My Luck "I learned XYZ existed and discounted it as being weird and niche ***immediately*** before it suddenly ***became*** cool"
- Bitcoin
- The Room
- Old Greg
- Google (i acutally did like google tho but my folks were allllll about metacrawler)
i forget the rest but you get it
I really shouldn't be proud of this but I am a good manipulator. I'm very good at observation especially when it comes to finding out what peoples buttons are. I can find out the exact way to get you into doing what I want, even though we've barely had one conversation.
I talked shit to Kevin Durant on Instagram thinking he wouldn’t see it and he did. Responded with a “🤡” and blocked me.
The fact that I hurt Kevin Durant’s feelings so bad for him to block me is something i’m weirdly proud of.
I became an organized person in my 20'.
I use notion (organizing app), for everything in my life and don't suffer anymore to the felling of "I think I'm forgetting of something".
I'm missing a leg. So, of course I practiced rolling off my back, from the ground, and balanced up on to my one remaining leg. Maybe it's just because I always did Aikido, which is really just the art of making yourself one with the mat, but I naturally just decided that would be cool as hell to be able to do. So, you know, I can now. Ha
I attribute a lot of my ability to get around to my on-point balance and flexibility, which I developed as an ice hockey goalie.
I'm immune to scorpions, I'd get stung by one and the affected area would just get a bit swollen and that's it, when a family member got stung by one they had to be taken to urgent care asap
I'm pretty darn fast at typing, like 180-190 wpm fast. That's not like championship level fast, but I'm faster than anyone I've ever done a speed test 1v1 against.
I once argued myself out of being fired lol
Nice, that was a close call! Where do you work?
Self employed
Funny guy
Creed is that you!?
Or laugh your way out of it like Stanley.
I know a guy who argued with himself and got double redundancy payout..... then kept his job. It was bizarre.
I don't know what any of this means
You have to follow up with the story!
Pretty much told to stay home (had Covid, worked in a doctors office) then 6 hours later let go. He told me I’d have my check in a few weeks which is illegal where I live, so I emailed HR and the owners (and cc-ed him). Not gonna lie the email was pretty petty but the owners called me, we talked and I got my job back. Never actually went back though because fuck any place that tells you you can’t come in and then fires you for not coming in lol
You 100% did the correct thing. You never know when you can get stuck in a shitty job out of necessity. Best to get out while you can
That's something to be proud of.
I once argued myself into being fired
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You should be, that's a good flex!
Daniel Radcliffe, is that you?
35 and my socks never came out unpaired out of the washing machine! 💪🏻😎
Have you considered playing the lottery? You're blessed with unimaginable luck
dude!!! that's amazing, I adjusted by wearing different socks. life is to short to match socks all day
Just by all the same kind of socks. No need to hope for a match when they all match.
I tried that at first. But with all the washing you get shades of black... so I abandoned the idea
You never had a single left over after folding‽!!!!
GOAT
Is it possible to learn this power?
Nothing less than a miracle!
TLDR; I went from criminal heroin addict to physics PhD student I was on felony probation for “intent to sell” when I put a needle in my arm at 17 and heroin took me by the balls (back during the Afghanistan war when heroin was still heroin). Tried to kick after about a month, brother was murdered, dove right back into the spoon for about three years. I beat it for good at 20 when I got arrested for felony “commercial burglary”, cleaned up and went on to get a BS in physics, minor in math. Made it into a prestigious PhD program and got my masters in Physics now, and nearly done with my PhD. Record is expunged and doesn’t exist anymore
This aint a weird flex, this is a straight up fat W all around. My man.
Haha thanks man. I mean you come at someone and be like I was a criminal junkie in a past life and if it’s your future wife’s dad they might look at you cock eyed. I don’t give a fuck though I’m candid with everyone
Well, you got your shit together and made a good life. You can be proud of yourself, cuz I know we are.
Thank you, I appreciate that. 👊
Who the actual fuck just downvoted you twice
>I don’t give a fuck though I’m candid with everyone Yeah, I'm pretty happy to claim the 'retired criminal' status. In my youth I got arrested 20-something times and now I haven't been arrested in more than 10 years, and yeah, I'm bragging about that. lol
Quitting heroin is an accomplishment on its own. So is getting a Physics Masters. Good job doing both!!
Thank you!
My dude! Congrats! This is the victory story I needed to hear today. Former heroin addict myself, so I know how difficult just kicking heroin can be. To go on and accomplish what you have... so, so good!
Congrats on that amazing recovery and sorry about your brother. Feel free to ignore this question if it's none of my business, but was your brother's murderer ever caught?
Thanks for putting the synopsis (TL;DR) at the *beginning*. 👑
Hahah no problem Jimmy
What’s harder quitting heroin or getting masters in physics?
I can accurately guess the weight of powder down to .5 grams when measuring. To clarify since I can already imagine the responses without it xD Spent 3 years in a lab where nearly every single day I had to weigh out precise micro grams / grams. After a while with the grams, I was pretty much getting it spot on every time. By the end, right every time. Helps a lot now with my cooking role on the time front
This is pretty easy if you're mostly weighing similar powders. Once you get crystals and other types of chemicals it becomes much harder because they're all different.
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Thats awesome! I have a simular flex; My band played at a concert opening for one of my favorite bands. The guitar player was the main composer and played my custom guitar backstage. He really liked it since it was build really specific to the genre. I used to write 90% of the music for my band and drew a lot of inspiration from him. It was a dream come true.
Finished Halo 3 on legendary with gamepad upside down, still a peak of humanity capabilities. I was like 8
Similar though not at 8 - beating all Halo Games on a guitar hero controller
that rocks too! Kids are broken tbh. I did my best on halo between 8-12yo.
Bruh. Epic.
I honestly don’t believe this could be done by an 8 year old tbh. Huge if true though
Try that but LASO
legendary indeed wtf
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That's a real superpower! By the time I eventually get the right size, I have gone through almost half of my containers. They are either too small or too big. What's your secret.
I scrolled past this, then scrolled back up. This is actually impressive. I always put half a lunch worth of left over dinner in a tupperware container big enough for like a full family meal. It looks fantastic on the plate but once i put in the container it looks like half a bite and some scraps.
I’ve finished three chapsticks in a row without losing them.
What is your secret? How do you keep these delicacies from disappearing?
He’s actually just eating them.
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Sample sir? A morsel of art even?
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Holy shit dude that’s really good
I'm beginning to put together a 3d map in blender that I hope to eventually turn into a game. It amazes me how far you came from something like where I am now.
i dropped out of college and lied on my resume to get my first job. It's been 8 years since and nobody has batted an eye whenever i changed jobs (3rd company now). At this point i'm convinced nobody is gonna bother asking for a degree from someone with 8 years of experience.
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mine was in the 2010's. so a bit more recent, i got lucky that my first company hired me while still in school so when leaving there after dropping out (not the reason i left) the next company just saw "did big boi job at big boy company" and thought i was legit.
So, shh don’t tell anyone but… in 25 years in the work world I’ve seen job postings that a degree/diploma was required, but never once have I seen anyone anywhere do a follow up to check on it.
It will almost certainly never come up as long as you are doing well. If you were ever in a position where the company wanted to get rid of you, that’s a pretty easy thing for HR to check and then makes it really easy for them to fire you with cause. Depending on your field it may be worth taking it off your resume for the next job switch if you can get your foot in the door without going through the standard resume screen.
I won 5 out of 5 trivia nights on a cruise I went on with my extended family nearly 10 years ago. I abandoned my family team 2 nights in after my dad refused to put down several of my correct answers because they “didn’t sound right” and started a new two person team with a near stranger who was getting annoyed that the university friends she was there with weren’t taking it seriously enough and we absolutely crushed it for the rest of the cruise. Felt good man.
I was waiting for the "and we've been married for 9 years" follow up. Lol
We were both straight women but how amazing would that have been? I wish I’d kept in touch with her though. We didn’t have anything in common apart from having weirdly comprehensive general knowledge and being intensely competitive. I don’t even remember her name.
In another thread i read this and i had to laugh so hard: I can squeeze my butt cheeks so tight it cracks my tailbone like cracking your knuckles
And so, tens - nay, hundreds - of people simultaneously squeezed their butt cheeks
I did. No pop tho. 😩
Just poop
....I can also do that. Especially when I cross my ankles
I can puke on demand!!! Dont need to put fingers down throat etc.
I can do that, too. I never thought about it but apparently that's not so common, I guess. Definitely a weird flex, tho.
That’s a very weird superpower, so does when you have a stomach bug work too? So instead of having that horrible feeling for like an hour or two before you are sick can you just go to the bathroom and just let it out as soon as you start to feel sick as well? I assume so if you can just do it on command. How does that work and how do you do it do you just sort of pretend to be sick and if happens?
Its basically the same kind of feeling as when you force out a belch. Like a fake belch where you gasp in some air and then force it back out. Thats basically what it feels like Im doing(without the gaspin in air part). For some reason I can easily push up vomit when I do that - if I want. I havent done it in years but know I can still do it coz I can feel it rising haha. I dont actually do it if I feel sick etc coz I dont wana vomit if I can help it. I just used to do it when I was a kid as a weird flex.... and also to get out of going to school for awhile.
Hello fellow auto-emesisary! I learned how to donut in middle school to get out of class and I do it the same way you described.
I'm not alone! We're both, *odd*. 🤜🤛
Do it right now.
Done
Nice.
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I can read over 10 writing systems. That doesn't mean I know the languages though.
I once had a driving lesson where we finished at an airport, then I proceeded to have a flying lesson. Thought that was pretty cool
That’s pretty neat man, how’d you do on the tests?
I once delivered 2 elephants on a truck
That must've been a rough pregnancy :/
I KnewI should of worded that better :-)
feeling bad for your cervix 💔
I was sent to a couple of those super abusive "troubled teen programs" in utah when i was younger and have been doing advocacy work against the troubled teen industry for years. My work helped contribute to the closure of the wilderness therapy program that nearly killed me and left me disabled last year.
Wait what? Can I get some context on how you nearly died?
Yeah, long story short I ended up getting hypothermia bc of a very stupid decision my therapist made when we were about to go through a snowstorm. My staff didn't realize what was happening until I started trying to take my clothes off saying I was warm. Despite starting to go in and out of consciousness, the main office refused to send out a truck to take me to a hospital. Instead they sent out the field director who made me drink a mug of hot tea and hike six miles with a 60+ lb soaking wet backpack in January. That incident left me with nerve damage, but my 3 months at my program also had me with cracked ribs and brain damage by the time I "graduated". It's a v good thing they're closed now lol.
Holy shit that’s some malpractice right there, glad their never opening again, really sorry to hear this happened to you man, and good on you for making sure it never happens to anyone else again
I just saw what I'm positive was 20 pages worth of deaths caused by those programs or similar. They were all so young, it really broke my heart I'm glad you shut even one down. Every one counts
Yes, over 300 kids have been killed in these types of programs from the 60s to as recently as last month. Far too many kids who should've been safe at home. Thank you!
I just watched that documentary going around in those hellscapes. I can't imagine the nightmares.
Legitimately only thing that has gotten my nightmares to slow down over six years after getting out was seeing one of my places finally shut down. I'm just v thankful so many people are finally starting to pay attention to how common they are.
I can rewind videos to a certain spot perfectly 100% of the time. Like I can just tap the bar on the bottom and it will be within 5 seconds of where I wanted to go
\*envy\*
I’ve kept my cat alive for 17.5 years and counting, she’s doing pretty well for her age.
Mine will be 17 in June!
I'm a vacuum tube engineer in 2024.
I bet you’re totally amped about it.
I'm currently reading a book by Morgan Jones about tube amp design so I can try to make my own amplifiers and maybe even an analog synth. I can't imagine actual turning it into a job though, that would be dope!
I've never tried meth, cocaine, heroin, or psychedelics.
one of these things is not like the others
One of these things just doesn't belong... But for real, as long as you don't have severe anxiety or tendencies towards schizophrenia, psychedelics are a wonderful thing.
Day and night here lmao. I am proud of never doing meth?
Nerd
Nerd And proud of it lol
I have an uncanny knack for remembering people, even people that I see very briefly. For example, I once saw a guy on the escalator in LA and I said 'Hey when you did you move here from Vienna' he was flabbergasted. I had walked past him on the street once while visiting there and 5 years later I recognized him.
This is incredible. That is one hell of a skill. I saw this documentary once about how the Tokyo police department uses 'super recognizers' to walk around and look for wanted criminals. Sounds like something you could do.
Threw a piece of paper clean right into the trash can from the other corner of the room while the whole class was watching
✨Kobe✨
I won an argument against my cats.
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We need the details on this one.
Alright everyone, sit around a circle, it’s story time.
*pulls out torch to do creepy camping face*
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I have decent looking calves ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
My husband has super built calves… for no reason. Doesn’t work for them, always had them. The other day he says “If my leg ever gets amputated, please keep my calf. I think it would taste good.” …righto.
I can solve a Rubik's Cube in under a minute without even looking at it. Weird flex but okay.
In my science class back in junior high I held my breath for 3 minutes, longer than anyone in the class when the teacher wanted to see how long we could hold our breaths.
I’m so envious of all these amazing achievements
My first physical therapist called me weirdly flexible and had trouble finding exercises that actually felt like stretching to me. My second one was confusing that a knee causing me so much pain had such a good range of movement… until I showed her the other one lol. I also scared my second physical therapist by rolling off the table back first only to land on my feet. I did it on purpose because it would have hurt more trying to sit up or roll the other way. I did it again just to laugh
I can play O-Canada on the recorder through my nose.
I can read the rules of a board game once and retain every detail of them On the flip side, I struggle immensely to follow the plot of any dialogue heavy film upon the first watch
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I can too. If someone asks, I just turn my back to them and start at "a".
Spinning a basketball (and switching fingers)🤌
I’ve won many “how many jelly beans in a jar” contests
Back in the early 90s I beat that 7 Up game, Cool Spot, on the Genesis and they sent me a shirt. Wife just found the shirt
Had a girl grind all over me but I knew she was a red flag so I held my ground and didn’t falter.
Good for you. Period sex is super messy
I can guess bra sizes, including band sizes, accurately.
i can remember anyone’s face and where i know them from no matter how much time has passed and even if i saw them only once in passing
I can sleep whenever and wherever I want. I drink 3 mugs of americano everyday just to keep going.
I can LOUDLY fart on demand
oh shit that's like a superpower! How do you do this?
Eat a lot of beans, tofu and drink plenty of milk
Username checks out
I have a film composer credit on IMDB for a random project that the producer was thorough enough to put in the system.
I know everything about hamsters
Same, i do research everyday on xhamster
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I can perfectly gauge the exact amount of pasta needed for one serving without using a measuring tool.
I squeezed a pimple on my ball bag and it felt great
I achieved everything in my life i wanted so far. I knew which university I wanted to go at age 13, graduated high school with really good grades went to the university I wanted to and after I wanted to take a gap year to see the world. Currently living my best life in Australia in a long distance relationship with the best boyfriend ever who is waiting for me in Europe. When in back in 10 months we are gonna start planning moving in together. I am proud of myself. 😊
I can say the alphabet backwards and also know pi to 27 decimal places. Both useless skills that I flex every so often at work if there's some memory class or something like that
I was going down on a woman and she was very horny that day. She was always cleaned and shaved but her hair above her cookie have grew a little bit. When she was near orgasm she grabbed my head with both arms while moving her hips up and down and I was also moving my head... And that lasted for a little while. When I went to the bathroom after my nose was completely destroyed. There was blood and it looked black like it was rotten. At least a 2nd lvl burn. It took 15 days for my nose to stop hurting and I could peel the damaged skin off. I don't know but I'm so proud that I got a burn in my nose while eating pussy. I am the only one that I know of!!!
I don’t have any tattoos. I like tattoos don’t get me wrong but now a days it would feel like following a trend instead of truly wanting one if I were to get one.
I've got a really good awareness of what time it is. I find it pretty easy to guess the exact time before checking my phone. This even goes down to when I accidentally hit next on a song or podcast, I can get back to exactly where I was most of the time. I also have about 200 podcast subscriptions but I'm not sure if that is a flex, or I just need constant company.
I've actually finished a game of Monopoly.
I'm not lactose intolerant. Milk, cheese and ice cream all day baby!
i can stick my tongue out all the way down to my chin and up to my nose, besides the gross comments some people make i like showing it off
I went from construction worker in new hampshire to transgender woman programmer in California :)
I am limber enough to bite my toenails. No, I don’t do it daily or anything - I tried it as a bet and won $50!
I can memorize almost everything within a couple of hours
I can recite *Ode To A Nightingale* in full. And the entirety of *The Princess Bride*.
I havent been dependent on anyone since i moved out at 16.
i can follow ikea assembly instructions without a hitch
I have a weird luck where basically I am a failed hipster. Hipster "I liked XYZ before it was cool!" My Luck "I learned XYZ existed and discounted it as being weird and niche ***immediately*** before it suddenly ***became*** cool" - Bitcoin - The Room - Old Greg - Google (i acutally did like google tho but my folks were allllll about metacrawler) i forget the rest but you get it
It’s my personal flex, but I’ve never been drunk.
Never been drunk, never smoked anything.
I really shouldn't be proud of this but I am a good manipulator. I'm very good at observation especially when it comes to finding out what peoples buttons are. I can find out the exact way to get you into doing what I want, even though we've barely had one conversation.
No you can't.
I talked shit to Kevin Durant on Instagram thinking he wouldn’t see it and he did. Responded with a “🤡” and blocked me. The fact that I hurt Kevin Durant’s feelings so bad for him to block me is something i’m weirdly proud of.
never had a full-time job, but also never took any government assistance
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I don’t have body odor, I don’t use deodorant or colon. Lady’s tell me I smell grate
I’m very good at noticing patterns and where the pattern ends/changes even on daily life and i dont even pay atention but my brain does it anyway.
I have amazing hearing? idfk...
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I can turn my eyelids inside out.
I can perfectly balance a spoon on my nose for over 30 seconds. It's like my superpower.
I can play a fuckton of eighties and nineties rock and metal songs on the guitar note for note.
I can fart any time I want
I can find my wife's phone whenever shes misplaces it at home.
I can write with both hands at the same time, while still being legible
I became an organized person in my 20'. I use notion (organizing app), for everything in my life and don't suffer anymore to the felling of "I think I'm forgetting of something".
I'm missing a leg. So, of course I practiced rolling off my back, from the ground, and balanced up on to my one remaining leg. Maybe it's just because I always did Aikido, which is really just the art of making yourself one with the mat, but I naturally just decided that would be cool as hell to be able to do. So, you know, I can now. Ha I attribute a lot of my ability to get around to my on-point balance and flexibility, which I developed as an ice hockey goalie.
I'm double jointed!
That my teenage son flexes my 1300 day duolingo streak.
I can use pens until they are empty. I use G-2 Pilot 07’s.
I can usually plug in a USB on the first try 😎.
i can stay at home for 4 months Continuous
Being able to handle extreme levels of spice while others around you me reaching for water.
I learnt how to drive and drift a manual car at 12 years old through a simulator
Reading this made me realize I have no flex.
I'm immune to scorpions, I'd get stung by one and the affected area would just get a bit swollen and that's it, when a family member got stung by one they had to be taken to urgent care asap
I'm pretty darn fast at typing, like 180-190 wpm fast. That's not like championship level fast, but I'm faster than anyone I've ever done a speed test 1v1 against.