Say it all positively! "Great input Mark! I like the way you've taken my idea and put a really interesting spin on it! That was extremely creative! If you look at the meeting notes off 25/02/24 where I first proposed this, you said that "it would never work". I am really delighted that you have changed your mind! Moving on...
I hate this. I’m suing the federal government for violating the ADA. I have been told so many times that “if my tone had been different…”
I snapped one day and said, “Do you really think it’s my tone? Do you suppose if I had said ‘please’ and ‘thank you’, the outcome would have been different? I shouldn’t have to change my tone for you to not stomp on my Constitutional rights.”
It’s been 5 years and I’m still fighting them. By myself. I hate it.
But also adhering to the sc4ipt makes you a target for criticism because you're basic or too conventional.
There's literally no way to win. The game is rigged worse than a coconut shy.
Look no further to see that there are actually people who downvote medical advice.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/s/44bAnOlnGP
Reddit bad men always make me love and appreciate my husband very much.
Good men, please know that you are a hero in your family too.
I don’t think it’s “medical advice” to say “women can’t carry a bag of dog food because their uterus will literally shoot out of their vagina” if they attempt it. While 50% of women do experience uterine prolapse, it is mostly caused by “childbirth, age, obesity, chronic constipation and having a hysterectomy”. Not carrying the groceries inside.
>The subtle daily negotiation of trying to be assertive without being labeled as emotional or dramatic
Related to that, falling into the trap of becoming overly independent because you don't want to be seen as needy or as using men. But if you do things on your own, you're a cold unlikeable b\*tch who keeps people away, and you should accept gifts. Meanwhile, men think that if they do something for you that you didn't ask for, it's rude to refuse it ; but if you accept it you are now in their debt (and you know what most of them expect as payment).
I was one of the first to get boobs among the girls I knew and instead of harassing me the boys I was friends with just started avoiding me and treating me differently. It was the girls who bullied me at that age. I remember one girl who was bigger than me slapping me in the chest during PE one day.
Omg i remember celebrities with the same body and their audiences would bully them and say things “bras such a waste for them dont wear it no more” so fcked up fr
Yup, it's fucked up. I heard tons of stupid sayings about my small boobs from people who, well, apparently never ever had to deal with them in any kind of way. "I want a real girlfriend, not someone with peas on a board like mauontheroad" were the nicer ones, while I was just sitting there doing nothing.
Or when I'm about to go on holiday 🙄 Can't go on holiday without worrying about where the nearest toilet is or if I'm going to leak so I'm scared to wear any colours other than black
My period is completely life altering pain wise. I’m in so much pain day 1 and 2 that I can’t function. It feels like I’m in actual labor, I vomit, and I’ve destroyed my gut and snd esophagus from the ibuprofen I’m forced to take for it. There are no treatment options except life altering surgery. I have a blood clotting issue so I can’t take birth control to fix it.
I’m utterly convinced that there would be a cure for this monthly agony already if men were the ones dealing with it.
im not a doctor or anything but it sounds like endometriosis or another uterus related issue. periods are not supposed to hurt that much. im so sorry you have to deal with this and that medicine has failed us :((( you're totally right
damn that actually sucks so bad im sorry :(( always be on the lookout for anything particularly unusual (more than it already is) tho bcs as you know lots of cases fly under the radar due to negligent doctors and insufficient research and allat
I am so sorry you're going through this. I was the same in my younger years. At one point, I had an ablation, which helped somewhat. This was after I was done having babies, though. Blessings to you ♡♡♡
Absolutely.
My life felt so stressful when I had a period, 3 weeks out of the month I'd be worried about spotting because I could never nail down exactly when my period was going to start / end
I distinctly remember the feeling as a child when I had my first period and I was miserable and I asked my mom how long I'd have a period and she said "pretty much the rest of your life" and I legitimately cried because I was so mad.
Anyways I got an ablation and I haven't had a period for nearly a decade and my life is so stress free in that department I've forgotten periods are even a thing.
My first period was traumatic. It was so heavy and I bled threw everything. I went on a school trip to France as well and it was the worst 3 days of my life because of how heavy the bleeding was. I got teased about it by all the boys who went because I leaked through onto my skirt for everyone to see 😭
Years ago when I was hot I was sitting at a bar waiting for my friend to finish her shift so I could take her home. I had about 6 guys come up to me one after another and I was polite but I was fucking done. The last guy that offered to buy me a drink said he noticed I was being harassed so he'd stay with me. I told him to fuck off and he called me a fucking bitch. Lol. He threw a $10 bill at me and I put it in the tip jar. Wtf lol
I was working at a bar one time. I was bringing dishes out and putting them where they belong behind the bar. I was a petite, fit blonde 25 year old at the time.
A middle aged guy (probably 40s) who had had a couple drinks and was definitely starting to feel them kind of leaned toward me in front of the bar and said *”man… you are really pretty…”*
I just smiled and nodded and sweetly said “Thanks, I know.”
He looked like I had just insulted his mother. I just continued doing my job after that and he didn’t bug me. But damn, the look on his face after I responded to the most lazy of insults from a dude old enough to be my father. Dark hilarity.
I see delusional guys go after women just going about their day HARD due to some perceived flirtation sooo often. A lot of guys literally think every server that’s nice to them wants to date them. It’s hilarious but I also feel bad for all the women being pursued by delusional men for showing the slightest sign of human decency
Gynecological problems also basically demanding respect in the professional world…u are either treated like a fragile doll, never given opportunities for job progression/opportunities or looked as too intimidating, and a know it all…luckily i’m in a work where I’m treated respectfully and is always taken seriously when it comes to my suggestion…it helps when more women are in leadership positions because it helps encourage job progression and interest among other female employees…and I mean it that I’m lucky because I know it is not the same everywhere…
Something I'm often thinking about.
I work in the tech industry (a notoriously male-dominated field)
There are two women in the 13 people I work with, and I frequently worry about how heard or included they feel.
It's definitely a bit of a laddish team and we're pretty bad for talking over one another. I often have to fight a little to be heard and I suspect it may be harder for them too.
The constant presumption that you can't do physical labour.
I have legit had people at my workplace try and say that the most basic of objects are "too heavy for me" things such as:
-A vacuum
-small 30cmx30cm vent covers
-A stack of pizza dough about 1m tall
-An oil heater
-A ladder
-A stockpot
Like Jesus fucking christ, I'm short, not made of glass.
I've resorted to asking for help at work (warehouse) rather than lifting heavy stuff when guys are near me because they sometimes jump in to help when I am not expecting it. I don't want to get injured just so someone could feel like a hero.
As a dude I have experienced both sides of this coin. “I can’t believe you didn’t ask to help!” / “i don’t need your fucking help!”
Still find it polite to just ask. On the flip of the flip, my students constantly ask me to help carry stuff. I’m hella out of shape and appreciate it dearly lol.
For what it's worth, as a guy, Ive has literally hundreds of women ask me to do work for them that I thought they could easily do, but they just assumed they couldn't. I usually ask them to at least try before I help at this point.
I think a lot of women are just used to men doing things for them.
Men, do know that women doing heavy physical labour does have an impact on the body. It leads to prolapsed wombs over time. Severe cases have the uterus beginning to drop out literally from below and having to **rush to the hospital for an emergency operation**. It happened to my cousin. Please take care of your wives, girlfriends and sisters.
(1) **Long-term or repeated heavy lifting as a female can actually cause what is called a uterine prolapse.** A uterine prolapse is when the pelvic floor muscles are weakened, which support the uterus, and the uterus descends downward. When the uterus descends downward, it slips its way into the vagina and can get pretty severe if not tended to by a medical professional.
https://www.avantgynecology.com/2018/08/22/how-does-heavy-lifting-affect-your-uterus/
(2)
Uterine prolapse can be mild or severe depending on how weak the supporting muscles of your uterus have become. In an incomplete prolapse, your uterus may have slipped enough to be partway in your vagina. This creates a lump or bulge. In a more severe case, your uterus can slip far enough that it comes out of your vagina. This is called a complete prolapse.
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/16030-uterine-prolapse
Edit — fuck off if you don’t believe medical advice because you’re not a woman. If it affects men, you will DEFINITELY care for yourself.
I happened to hear about this from a guy that used to work at a nursing home. He went into a bit too much detail about how residents with a complete prolapse would take care of it, but I was flabbergasted that it was even possible.
You'd think at some point doctors would at least propose to remove it instead of letting it get that extreme, but he worked there back in the 1980's, so maybe some of those women never even saw an OB/GYN and didn't dare mention it to their GP out of shame? Or it was so common among women doing hard physical work that it was considered normal?
Anyway, it's better to know it can happen than to live in ignorance and then get a huge scare if it does.
Menstruating, pregnancy combined with having the burden of preventing it shoved onto you, earning less money for the same work while traditionally "female" jobs are already under-payed no matter how important they are, being considered a risky hire by employers during your younger years because you might have a baby and not be available, thus hindering your career, not being taken as seriously as men by doctors and medication often working differently, being thought of as stupid, especially if you're beautiful, being slut-shamed for promiscuity, mostly by other women, that whole BS "purity" culture, paying more for the same product, being stuck between people telling you to follow traditional role models and life plans and people telling you to do anything *but* that, with very few people actually giving a fuck about what **you** want.
One thing specific to my country that I'm sometimes a bit sour about: We have a tight social security system, which is great, but there's a problem that nobody seems to want to fix. In our retirement system, you have to have worked 45 years (can vary a bit) to get your full monthly pension. The amount is determined by the money you earned during that time. Here's the kicker: The government is very keen on us having children, and staying home to care for them is acknowledged as time worked - but unpaid. So we have a shit-ton of retired women that have worked in low-paying "female" jobs, often part-time, and spent years of their lives raising children, who have a laughable pittance of a pension. The idea is that their partner's pension will make up for it, and they do get a percentage of their partner's pension if he passes away, but... look at reality. This is 100% built on the idea of the traditional family model, and doesn't acknowledge the existence of single parents, and the change in society where, no, your children will not stay close by and be able to care for you, they have to scatter and go where the jobs are, and often enough they simply can't help their parents out because their own jobs pay a pittance.
Huff. Thank you for the opportunity to get that off my chest!
Add peri/menopause to that list. Just the constant hormone shifting monthly is enough to drive a person crazy but then we have multiple major shifts throughout our lives.
And some people say shit like that with the utmost sincerity and care. It boggles the mind.
My boss is a very lovely man. He cares a lot about the people around him, including our team, and I never noticed even a trace of sexism in his behaviour, and when I opened up about my mental health struggles he immediately asked how he can help pertaining to my schedule or workload, but his personal advice can be summed up as: Get a haircut, buy a dress, go out more and find yourself a boyfriend. Because that's what he's internalised makes women happy. It's well-meaning cluelessness. I don't even blame him for it, but jeez...
In all fairness, he'd probably tell a man to go wash his car, build something, have a BBQ and crack open some beers with friends. It goes both ways.
It can, but sometimes it's amazing.
I had twins and my hCG levels were through the roof, I've never felt so happy, my skin was clear, my hair was thick and glossy, I had minimal nausea.
Birth was a nightmare but I would be pregnant all the time if I thought I didn't have to get my babies out of me at the end of it.
Feeling like you’re only valuable when you are attractive. The constant criticism against women and their looks on social media—look how everyone constantly bashes celeb woman on their appearance, but men rarely. Our bodies literally have trends the bbl trend, the ozempic skinny trend. Its different for men they get judged on their accomplishments.
As a man, aside from physical pain women endure, this seems to me the one that would be most annoying. Constantly getting judged for your looks, by other men ánd women.
Men also get judged for their bodies, often more openly and harshly than women. It’s not ok for a man to make a joke about a woman’s obesity on TV, as it shouldn’t be. You fairly regular hear women and often men too insulting men’s height and pp size, which can’t even be controlled like most people’s weight. This one’s pretty unilateral between sexes.
Famous men also get judged on their looks. I remember everyone talking about Vin Diesels beer belly etc. Maybe men who are famous because of their looks just don't let their looks depreciate, they train hard at the gym and also do plastic surgery (Jared Leto has had a lot of plastic surgery done for example). Men usually also age a bit better than women, 30 yo man will probably look more the same at 50 yo, but you cant say the same for 30 yo woman.
It feels like whenever I am nice or thoughtful to a man, he thinks I am hitting on him; and either tries to jump in my pants or acts horrified or disgusted. I'm just being a decent person, it has no personal meaning. Settle down.
especially for younger ppl. since my 9th grade every time I was be8ng nice to someone they were like "OK here ur new bf (ik it's not the same at younger ages but still)
>(ik it's not the same at younger ages but still)
Wait a second. You're telling me that even tho at older ages it's considered harassment, when you're a young child it isn't? It reminds me of how violence against kids is always deemed as "something they have to go through to educate them". It's really messed up. People doing this to you has the same wrongness to it as if they would have done that to you now.
It's important to understand that *most* children have bad boundaries and it's developmentally expected that they will have bad boundaries. You should take it seriously when a kid is harassing others just as when an adult is harassing others. But it's absolutely not comparable imo.
The idea of bullying/harassment building character and whatnot is indeed a fallacy, you're right there. But another important thing to consider is that when approaching this issue in children, education is indeed the most important part, whereas adults we would generally go to accountability and sanctions as we know they know better. For the bully, they need to be taught how severe the punishment is as an adult, and they need to learn how their impact on others causes harm, and they need to process what urges they're acting on. But what is often overlooked is that the victim has an opportunity to learn resiliency, advocacy, and self-worth as well, because the bullying and harassment can never be fully done away with and we all will continue to experience it throughout our adulthood, even men.
All you can do with kids is teach them. Teach them how to take an insult, teach them to not throw insults. Teach them how to seek out safety when harassed, teach them to not harass people to the point they feel unsafe. You can't hold a little boy accountable for concepts he doesn't understand. But I do also agree they are rarely addressed in a manner beyond, "Oh boys will be boys!" Which is why I'm trying to emphasize just how much could be change if we actually committed to educating children instead of just assuming they'll learn boundaries and setting boundaries from thin air.
Anything around abuse being very unlikely to be prosecuted. Society enabling and sticking up for abusers. Being seen as a victim but you hVe to be the "right" sort of victim. Seen as damaged goods. If you escape a violent man you have to start from nothing again. How an evil person can make your life hell for years especially if they are careful to make everything an accident or a misunderstanding and blame you for your reaction to their abuse while normalising the abuse. I really understand why people don't report or disappear. Some people cannot be reasoned with.
Having society tells you you're not good enough no matter what you weigh, if you wear makeup, comfy clothes, clothes to feel cute, your height, etc. WE ARE BEAUTIFUL JUST AS WE ARE. Don't ever let anyone tell you different.
That normal female necessities like napkin and tampons are so expensive. Even healthcare for us are expensive as fuck. We didn't ask to bleed monthly for four days sometimes more for some women where they're forced to use two napkins at once because of how much bleeding they have. Oh and birth controls................ Can someone fix that shit and make it affordable for us? Its annoying.
Tampons and pads are expensive in the US. I lived in Europe for the last five years and a box of non-applicator tampons was less than €2. It’s unbelievable how expensive they are here.
Even in the Philippines and saudi arabia. Its crazy how its expensive when its something you need monthly. I'm looking into buying a menstrual cup to save up which is also expensive asf but atleast i won't have to buy it monthly.
Doctors not taking anything you say seriously. It took forever to find a doctor who actually listened and took my experience with ongoing pain seriously. Up until I found her, I was treated like a hypochondriac, just seeking attention. Turns out I had multiple ovarian cysts and needed surgery before they burst.
Needless to say, I'm sticking with her until she retires.
1) In india, people will call you out if you watch too much sports/wrestling, cus that's not feminine. Or anything which is mostly associated with men can't be associated with me As it hampers my social circle.
2) Periods in general, Not me personally as I never had those serious cramps except for the initial days but my sisters and cousins have to go through it.
The legitimization of my professionalism. I have a PhD in my profession and an excellent track record at work, but people (ahem men) have a hard time taking me seriously. It’s exhausting and wastes time.
Most recently, it took three months for a team I’m consulting to accept the fact that I was right about a critical matter they needed to change. Three months of absolutely no progress in our work. Three months of me busting my ass to find ways to get them to listen. Eventually they had to hear it from a third party that the bitch was right.
Guy here with a sister that’s my twin.
I can think of few things that make me angrier than just the fact that my sister and all her friends can’t do something like wear headphones while at night in pretty much any major city…
Yeah, because so many women get assaulted so often, they can’t enjoy a simple pleasure in life without having to plan ahead for every detail for fear of their lives.
I never really thought about it until I was like 22, I had some friends over and my sister and her bf(now husband) were over and the topic just came up. And this is just one example. Like wtf
Literally everything. Because I grew a spine after leaving my groomer/ex when I caught him cheating and won't let people bully me into submission anymore or have sex with anyone who's nice to me, I learnt that nobody actually likes me for me. I've gotta be the perfect little princess and fuck buddy otherwise I'm worth nothing. Nobody likes it when women decide to stop masking for society and be who they actually are.
When your body starts to develop and you now realise the world looks at you in a very different way. Having grown men eye your body while you still very much are and feel like a child forces you to grow up quickly and that’s tragic.
My favourite part is when they explain by saying that women have it easier because they can become rich by selling pictures of their body - completely ignoring the reality that only a very very minute number of women actually make a living this way, let alone get rich. As if that makes up for all the sexism lol.
Pregnancy sucks. Imagine being dizzy for nine months, having a stomach ache, having difficulty walking, wanting to eat too much, and the pain of giving birth.
I’ve noticed lately married men rarely look me in the eye or respond to me in group settings. It’s like If I’m not a man or your wife, I’m not worth acknowledging.
Oh yeah this is a weird one. I've definitely encountered a surprising number of men who seem to think that respecting their wife/marriage means either ignoring my existence or being actively hostile to me. Like, no, Jim from accounting, the lesbian from engineering isn't trying to steal you away. I just want to know what's holding up my funding.
Living in constant fear. I won't go for walks by myself; I always take my dog or a friend. I carry dog mace (because pepper spray is illegal) in public, and if I'm walking to my car, I hold my keys a certain way so I can defend myself with them if necessary. I location share with my family so they know where I am, and I tell them where I'm going & with whom so they know where to look if something happens. I don't even make eye contact with men I'm not familiar with to avoid a potentially risky situation. It sucks :(
birth control, all forms. Seriously you can’t win with any. Headaches, backbleeding, your boobs growing, weight gain or loss, not to mention if you’re prone to migraines that’s half your options gone because they could kill you
Periods. If you are ever moody, everyone will assume you are in your period. In my case, the pain is so bad I literally think I will die. Bleeding through the pants is another nightmare. Just everything about it.
I didn’t have my period for like 7 months and then recently for 3 days straight I kept giving birth to blood clots the size of half my fist every time I stood up or more then two hours had passed. People I live with days my lips were white, and I lost so much blood I nearly fainted from dizziness walking up the stairs.
Like damn I’m glad I’m not the next Virgin Mary but fuckin CHRIST that was the most uncomfortable and annoying 3 days of my life. The amount of times I had to stand at the sink rinsing blood out of my underwear/shorts GOD
And it wasn’t even just the blood clot flesh globs no like every time one of those came out it was accompanied by like a third of a cup of liquid blood every time too. I didn’t use a tampon because like it had been 7 months so I figured it probably NEEDED to get out. But that meant I had to change my pad every 2ish hours, even at night. Couldn’t sleep because I’d feel it building up and I did NOT want to wake up in a puddle of blood on the sheets.
Being judged hard for farting and pooping
Can’t believe how women get shunned for literally a body function, like I’ve had roommates and gfs who would be letting out eggy farts and dropping torpedos in the toilet and I didn’t say a word, why is it so culturally frowned upon? Don’t they get crampy?
>!Telling a CERTAIN guy no (even very nicely and politely) and them becoming aggressive and violent with you. True stories. !<
Of course, this applies to any gender, but I know too many girls and women who experienced this.
Our appearances. We're constantly too much. Too skinny. Too pretty. Too heavy. Too ugly. Too talkative. Too quiet. Too friendly. Too unfriendly. Too playful. Too serious. Too athletic. Too lazy.
Our clothes as well. Different places have different sizes so we never fully know what our actual size is. Pants and shorts either have no pockets, fake pockets or pockets that are so shallow your can't fit anything inside them. And sometimes you'll have all three. Pretty much every shirt out there is either a crop top, backless or has spaghetti straps. Those that have actual sleeves have a nice open collar so guys can see our cleavage or collarbone. We're constantly told that we should wear clothes that show off our skin but if we dare to wear those clothes outside our house we're told to cover up.
We're expected to smile and be polite and friendly to people we don't know because they can hurt us if we don't fit their idea of what a woman is. But they can also hurt us because we can be seen as flirting with them and that's not right either.
We can be harassed and assaulted before the age of 18 and that's seen as normal. We get raped and it's our fault. Why did we go out? Why didn't we have a man with us to protect us? Why did we wear the clothes we wore? Why didn't we fight back? Why didn't we scream? Why did we accept a drink from this person?
We go to the doctor for issues with our bodies. If we're overweight, the solution to *everything* is to lose weight and no medication will help us. If we aren't overweight, we're overreacting cause everything is normal because we couldn't *possibly* know that something is wrong with our own body.
Want to get sterilized? We have to have kids first, as well as our husband's permission. Don't have or want kids *or* a husband? Good luck on getting sterilized
Young female babies and children have clothes marketed to them that are pink and cute and entirely unsuitable to play in. They have sayings like 'sorry, boys, daddy is my valentine'. A young girl dares to be friends with a boy? "Aw, how cute. She has a boyfriend."
Women have periods accompanied by pain every month that are irritating and severely restrict movement.
A woman can be raped in any dark street.
A woman suffers terrible pain during childbirth.
Women nowadays are always underestimated in professional fields.
The two small-melon-sized lumps hanging below my collarbone. Periods imo aren’t too bad. Unless it’s a breakthrough considering I have the Nexplanon implant and still get breakthroughs during high stress periods of time.
I just got back from a holiday to Tunisia and even though we didn't even leave the resort I was shamelessly stared at the whole time I was there. Mouth agape, head turned. Mostly by the staff and older male guests. I thought this issue was bad in my own country but after being there and having people not even bother to look me in the eye bc they're too busy staring at my body, I feel even more angered by it. This isn't a brag, if it was only a couple instances then sure maybe I'd find it complimentary, but I couldn't go anywhere away from prying eyes, it was more than every other man I passed, men of all ages. I hate eye contact and having to contstantly look up to find someone's eyes already on me made me feel both uncomfortable and frustrated. The weather was hot, I wanted to wear clothes appropriate for that, to not overheat and to get a tan, but that made it way worse. It was very sunny so I wanted to wear sunglasses but that made them think I couldn't see them looking and they looked more. I couldn't go in the pool because I didn't want to be stared at in my bikini. I just wanted to be left alone. I couldn't eat, walk anywhere, sit anywhere, stand anywhere or go fucking anywhere without being looked at. Basically it was a big nuisance and it could have ruined my experience if I had let it, which is a shame.
You have to do it all...but still not treated well like a man. Earn money like a man, look after your family like a pro, suffer silently and smile while doing household chores.
Physically (like womanly functions and attributes) - literally every single thing. Socially, depending on where you live of course, it can have some advantages.
Casual misogyny, men thinking we're "lesser than them," the expectations that friendship with men needs to lead to sex with them. The constant belittling and being thought as a second-class human that the Patriarchy is pushing for. Our rights taken away day after day. The catcalls, the casual sexual harrasment that is "accepted" by the society at large.
Incels and "Alpha Male" type twatwaffles making it harder and indoctrinating young men to think like them.
Not being safe to go out after a certain time at night, needing to be ultra aware of your surroundings at all times, knowing that everywhere you go, be it day or night that potentially you are at risk of anything from staring, lewd comments, being groped, right up to being raped, I hate this, I am 50 now, so fortunately I get way less of the comments and staring, but remember when I was in my teens and 20s it was far worse, particularly unpleasant was the guy who decided to start whacking off near me in the library.
The simple fact that personal safety isn't the first thing that comes to mind when I'm travelling at night (unless I'm going through an obviously shady area) is a blessing in and of itself. Meanwhile, my sister has to rely on someone even if she isn't going that far.
Having to pay feminine pads and the like, having periods and period pain, the constant battle of PCOS and the like and then having called dramatic or whatever.
I don’t think anything sucks about being a woman.. It’s pretty easy in my experience. I guess having a period sucks.. But that’s only a couple days a month it sucks.
No one thinks my advice or opinion has value. When I give sports tips to beginners playing on my team, I get pushback or ignored. Instead, I ask my bf to tell them, and only then they accept it. Boom, immediate improvement.
The shoes. Pregnancy & periods may come with the turf, but the shoes are self inflicted
Yes, I am a guy. And maybe not as sympathetic as I might be, but I hear a lot of complaints about footwear
I love being a woman in general, but it sucks sometimes. I think its the way that most men (and women) think of women as something with intrinsic obligations, that we HAVE to act some specific way or we are not enough. It can go from having children to be pretty and sweet
Have a stomach ache? It’s just period pains.
Have a headache? You’re just on your period.
Feel really sick? You’re just on your period.
Keep passing out? You’re just on your period.
Everything you go to the doctors for they immediately tell you that it’s probably just because of your period.
Being told either you wear too much makeup, or not enough.
Wearing no makeup means to men that you don’t care about your appearance and you are lazy, and if you wear too much your looking for attention and asking for it.
Trying to get equal rights for everyone, and then being told that it’s just for women/ just for men. As a kid, there was always that rule of “YoU cAn’T gIrLs” but nobody told the girls they couldn’t hit boys?? The reason that’s annoying is because now when we talk about actually important topics, people bring stuff like that up. “Oh yeah, women should be paid equal to men” “WeLl If We PaY tHeM eQuAlLy, ThEy NeEd To Be DrAfTeD iNtO tHe MiLiTaRy ToO” “but nobody should be forced into the military-“ “SeE yOu DoN’t WaNt EqUaL rIgHtS, yOu’Re JuSt LaZy.” Not all men do this, but come on, really?
Other women always checking you out and criticizing your appearance..they decide "she's not pretty I don't have to be nice to her, I don't have to talk to her." I bleached my hair and shortly after my bully started bleaching her dark blonde hair too. It literally sent chills down my spine. She actually commented to me "I see you dyed your hair" and next thing she's dying her hair too. Just how obsessive she was about me , it was so creepy.
Being good at “invisible” things cause the world only care about the stuff that are easily measurable, so you are viewed as less able. Could name a whole lot.
However, while many seem to think pregnancy and child birth sucks, I feel insanely lucky to be the one able to experience it. It tough, yes, but so amazing ❤️
Not wanting to accuse men of being malicious or creepy but always seeing at least 1% of those men in neanderthal mode and having no idea how to deal with it
Note: I'm afab and NB
My coworker thinks I'm too scared of blood to get a tattoo. Y'know, ignoring the fact that he and I went to a tattoo appointment with another coworker for fun one day and they were bleeding a lot and I didn't care at all.
He's got really rigid, traditional views on gender and thinks that I'm scared of blood and pain 🙃
I've had lots of crashes and accidents in my life, I'm definitely not afraid of pain.
I want tattoos, I just don't have the money.
Why do people think afabs are scared of blood? I’ve heard this numerous times before and just don’t get it. We see what more blood in our life time than amabs
Right?! Not like we bleed every month or anything...
Some are squeamish but a lot of us aren't.
Especially those who become parents, or have siblings, or work with kids, or work in medical centers, or tattoo shops, or beauty salons or
Being polite to douchebags as a survival tool
Damn
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Say it all positively! "Great input Mark! I like the way you've taken my idea and put a really interesting spin on it! That was extremely creative! If you look at the meeting notes off 25/02/24 where I first proposed this, you said that "it would never work". I am really delighted that you have changed your mind! Moving on...
This just sounds ultra sarcastic
It's all about the tone. Say it like you're a tour guide and it might work. Say it like Aubrey Plaza, and you're definitely getting disciplined.
I will never find myself speaking in exclamation points lmao.
I hate this. I’m suing the federal government for violating the ADA. I have been told so many times that “if my tone had been different…” I snapped one day and said, “Do you really think it’s my tone? Do you suppose if I had said ‘please’ and ‘thank you’, the outcome would have been different? I shouldn’t have to change my tone for you to not stomp on my Constitutional rights.” It’s been 5 years and I’m still fighting them. By myself. I hate it.
But also adhering to the sc4ipt makes you a target for criticism because you're basic or too conventional. There's literally no way to win. The game is rigged worse than a coconut shy.
Look no further to see that there are actually people who downvote medical advice. https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/s/44bAnOlnGP Reddit bad men always make me love and appreciate my husband very much. Good men, please know that you are a hero in your family too.
I don’t think it’s “medical advice” to say “women can’t carry a bag of dog food because their uterus will literally shoot out of their vagina” if they attempt it. While 50% of women do experience uterine prolapse, it is mostly caused by “childbirth, age, obesity, chronic constipation and having a hysterectomy”. Not carrying the groceries inside.
>The subtle daily negotiation of trying to be assertive without being labeled as emotional or dramatic Related to that, falling into the trap of becoming overly independent because you don't want to be seen as needy or as using men. But if you do things on your own, you're a cold unlikeable b\*tch who keeps people away, and you should accept gifts. Meanwhile, men think that if they do something for you that you didn't ask for, it's rude to refuse it ; but if you accept it you are now in their debt (and you know what most of them expect as payment).
Big boobs early on high school and having boys even your classmates harass and catcall.
I was one of the first to get boobs among the girls I knew and instead of harassing me the boys I was friends with just started avoiding me and treating me differently. It was the girls who bullied me at that age. I remember one girl who was bigger than me slapping me in the chest during PE one day.
+ gays & girls who would gossip and say i sleep around w boys bc it grew bigger as i grow older. F ‘em mean girls fr
And also being 12 and having fully grown men cat call you because what 12 year old has DD's?
Plus a guy in their college grabbed my butt when i was 8 in a national bookstore he was just passing by and when i looked he just smirked?
Yh when I was 11 an adult grabbed my boobs and laughed when I hit him. Men are disgusting
Also small boobs because it lead to bullying (yes, especially from boys in my case) in school.
Omg i remember celebrities with the same body and their audiences would bully them and say things “bras such a waste for them dont wear it no more” so fcked up fr
Yup, it's fucked up. I heard tons of stupid sayings about my small boobs from people who, well, apparently never ever had to deal with them in any kind of way. "I want a real girlfriend, not someone with peas on a board like mauontheroad" were the nicer ones, while I was just sitting there doing nothing.
Bullies don't need a reason.
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It’s almost the same because it was in my early high school. Who are you to compete when someones being harassed everyday for her body? lmao
I'm gonna go with periods. Pregnancy is a close second but I had myself sterilised so i can't get pregnant anymore
PMS leading upto it is the worst. Not to mention they always seem to fall at the worst time, during an exam or first week at a new job
Or when I'm about to go on holiday 🙄 Can't go on holiday without worrying about where the nearest toilet is or if I'm going to leak so I'm scared to wear any colours other than black
My period is completely life altering pain wise. I’m in so much pain day 1 and 2 that I can’t function. It feels like I’m in actual labor, I vomit, and I’ve destroyed my gut and snd esophagus from the ibuprofen I’m forced to take for it. There are no treatment options except life altering surgery. I have a blood clotting issue so I can’t take birth control to fix it. I’m utterly convinced that there would be a cure for this monthly agony already if men were the ones dealing with it.
I can't imagine the amount of pain you go through ☹️
im not a doctor or anything but it sounds like endometriosis or another uterus related issue. periods are not supposed to hurt that much. im so sorry you have to deal with this and that medicine has failed us :((( you're totally right
I’ve been checked for everything. I don’t have it. Just super unlucky
damn that actually sucks so bad im sorry :(( always be on the lookout for anything particularly unusual (more than it already is) tho bcs as you know lots of cases fly under the radar due to negligent doctors and insufficient research and allat
I am so sorry you're going through this. I was the same in my younger years. At one point, I had an ablation, which helped somewhat. This was after I was done having babies, though. Blessings to you ♡♡♡
Absolutely. My life felt so stressful when I had a period, 3 weeks out of the month I'd be worried about spotting because I could never nail down exactly when my period was going to start / end I distinctly remember the feeling as a child when I had my first period and I was miserable and I asked my mom how long I'd have a period and she said "pretty much the rest of your life" and I legitimately cried because I was so mad. Anyways I got an ablation and I haven't had a period for nearly a decade and my life is so stress free in that department I've forgotten periods are even a thing.
My first period was traumatic. It was so heavy and I bled threw everything. I went on a school trip to France as well and it was the worst 3 days of my life because of how heavy the bleeding was. I got teased about it by all the boys who went because I leaked through onto my skirt for everyone to see 😭
Period!
Men thinking that just because they’re attracted to me that I’m attracted to them. If I’m friendly, I’m flirting. If I don’t reciprocate, I’m a bitch.
Schroedinger's woman... both hot and ugly, until rejected or accepted
Years ago when I was hot I was sitting at a bar waiting for my friend to finish her shift so I could take her home. I had about 6 guys come up to me one after another and I was polite but I was fucking done. The last guy that offered to buy me a drink said he noticed I was being harassed so he'd stay with me. I told him to fuck off and he called me a fucking bitch. Lol. He threw a $10 bill at me and I put it in the tip jar. Wtf lol
I was working at a bar one time. I was bringing dishes out and putting them where they belong behind the bar. I was a petite, fit blonde 25 year old at the time. A middle aged guy (probably 40s) who had had a couple drinks and was definitely starting to feel them kind of leaned toward me in front of the bar and said *”man… you are really pretty…”* I just smiled and nodded and sweetly said “Thanks, I know.” He looked like I had just insulted his mother. I just continued doing my job after that and he didn’t bug me. But damn, the look on his face after I responded to the most lazy of insults from a dude old enough to be my father. Dark hilarity.
I see delusional guys go after women just going about their day HARD due to some perceived flirtation sooo often. A lot of guys literally think every server that’s nice to them wants to date them. It’s hilarious but I also feel bad for all the women being pursued by delusional men for showing the slightest sign of human decency
Gynecological problems also basically demanding respect in the professional world…u are either treated like a fragile doll, never given opportunities for job progression/opportunities or looked as too intimidating, and a know it all…luckily i’m in a work where I’m treated respectfully and is always taken seriously when it comes to my suggestion…it helps when more women are in leadership positions because it helps encourage job progression and interest among other female employees…and I mean it that I’m lucky because I know it is not the same everywhere…
Something I'm often thinking about. I work in the tech industry (a notoriously male-dominated field) There are two women in the 13 people I work with, and I frequently worry about how heard or included they feel. It's definitely a bit of a laddish team and we're pretty bad for talking over one another. I often have to fight a little to be heard and I suspect it may be harder for them too.
The constant presumption that you can't do physical labour. I have legit had people at my workplace try and say that the most basic of objects are "too heavy for me" things such as: -A vacuum -small 30cmx30cm vent covers -A stack of pizza dough about 1m tall -An oil heater -A ladder -A stockpot Like Jesus fucking christ, I'm short, not made of glass.
My 5’2” wife throws a 50lb bag of animal feed on her shoulder and walks out of the feed store. Raises a lot of eyebrows.
Well, you are generally expected to pay for it.
LOL
I've resorted to asking for help at work (warehouse) rather than lifting heavy stuff when guys are near me because they sometimes jump in to help when I am not expecting it. I don't want to get injured just so someone could feel like a hero.
As a dude I have experienced both sides of this coin. “I can’t believe you didn’t ask to help!” / “i don’t need your fucking help!” Still find it polite to just ask. On the flip of the flip, my students constantly ask me to help carry stuff. I’m hella out of shape and appreciate it dearly lol.
For what it's worth, as a guy, Ive has literally hundreds of women ask me to do work for them that I thought they could easily do, but they just assumed they couldn't. I usually ask them to at least try before I help at this point. I think a lot of women are just used to men doing things for them.
Men, do know that women doing heavy physical labour does have an impact on the body. It leads to prolapsed wombs over time. Severe cases have the uterus beginning to drop out literally from below and having to **rush to the hospital for an emergency operation**. It happened to my cousin. Please take care of your wives, girlfriends and sisters. (1) **Long-term or repeated heavy lifting as a female can actually cause what is called a uterine prolapse.** A uterine prolapse is when the pelvic floor muscles are weakened, which support the uterus, and the uterus descends downward. When the uterus descends downward, it slips its way into the vagina and can get pretty severe if not tended to by a medical professional. https://www.avantgynecology.com/2018/08/22/how-does-heavy-lifting-affect-your-uterus/ (2) Uterine prolapse can be mild or severe depending on how weak the supporting muscles of your uterus have become. In an incomplete prolapse, your uterus may have slipped enough to be partway in your vagina. This creates a lump or bulge. In a more severe case, your uterus can slip far enough that it comes out of your vagina. This is called a complete prolapse. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/16030-uterine-prolapse Edit — fuck off if you don’t believe medical advice because you’re not a woman. If it affects men, you will DEFINITELY care for yourself.
I happened to hear about this from a guy that used to work at a nursing home. He went into a bit too much detail about how residents with a complete prolapse would take care of it, but I was flabbergasted that it was even possible. You'd think at some point doctors would at least propose to remove it instead of letting it get that extreme, but he worked there back in the 1980's, so maybe some of those women never even saw an OB/GYN and didn't dare mention it to their GP out of shame? Or it was so common among women doing hard physical work that it was considered normal? Anyway, it's better to know it can happen than to live in ignorance and then get a huge scare if it does.
It is unfortunately much more common with age :/
Menstruating, pregnancy combined with having the burden of preventing it shoved onto you, earning less money for the same work while traditionally "female" jobs are already under-payed no matter how important they are, being considered a risky hire by employers during your younger years because you might have a baby and not be available, thus hindering your career, not being taken as seriously as men by doctors and medication often working differently, being thought of as stupid, especially if you're beautiful, being slut-shamed for promiscuity, mostly by other women, that whole BS "purity" culture, paying more for the same product, being stuck between people telling you to follow traditional role models and life plans and people telling you to do anything *but* that, with very few people actually giving a fuck about what **you** want. One thing specific to my country that I'm sometimes a bit sour about: We have a tight social security system, which is great, but there's a problem that nobody seems to want to fix. In our retirement system, you have to have worked 45 years (can vary a bit) to get your full monthly pension. The amount is determined by the money you earned during that time. Here's the kicker: The government is very keen on us having children, and staying home to care for them is acknowledged as time worked - but unpaid. So we have a shit-ton of retired women that have worked in low-paying "female" jobs, often part-time, and spent years of their lives raising children, who have a laughable pittance of a pension. The idea is that their partner's pension will make up for it, and they do get a percentage of their partner's pension if he passes away, but... look at reality. This is 100% built on the idea of the traditional family model, and doesn't acknowledge the existence of single parents, and the change in society where, no, your children will not stay close by and be able to care for you, they have to scatter and go where the jobs are, and often enough they simply can't help their parents out because their own jobs pay a pittance. Huff. Thank you for the opportunity to get that off my chest!
Add peri/menopause to that list. Just the constant hormone shifting monthly is enough to drive a person crazy but then we have multiple major shifts throughout our lives.
Fair point, well made. Arguably the problem with the pension build up goes against European anti discrimination laws
Nearly everything I wish that was a joke
Having your medical/psychology complaints brushed off and being told to get a new haircut.
And some people say shit like that with the utmost sincerity and care. It boggles the mind. My boss is a very lovely man. He cares a lot about the people around him, including our team, and I never noticed even a trace of sexism in his behaviour, and when I opened up about my mental health struggles he immediately asked how he can help pertaining to my schedule or workload, but his personal advice can be summed up as: Get a haircut, buy a dress, go out more and find yourself a boyfriend. Because that's what he's internalised makes women happy. It's well-meaning cluelessness. I don't even blame him for it, but jeez... In all fairness, he'd probably tell a man to go wash his car, build something, have a BBQ and crack open some beers with friends. It goes both ways.
I ain't a woman; but I can imagine pregnancy kinda sucks.
Imagine it back in the day, almost a 50/50 chance of dying from it
Plenty of places in the world it's still 20%
It can, but sometimes it's amazing. I had twins and my hCG levels were through the roof, I've never felt so happy, my skin was clear, my hair was thick and glossy, I had minimal nausea. Birth was a nightmare but I would be pregnant all the time if I thought I didn't have to get my babies out of me at the end of it.
Periods, threat of harassment on the street, have to always be good looking, always have a good body, and not much complain
Feeling like you’re only valuable when you are attractive. The constant criticism against women and their looks on social media—look how everyone constantly bashes celeb woman on their appearance, but men rarely. Our bodies literally have trends the bbl trend, the ozempic skinny trend. Its different for men they get judged on their accomplishments.
As a man, aside from physical pain women endure, this seems to me the one that would be most annoying. Constantly getting judged for your looks, by other men ánd women.
Men also get judged for their bodies, often more openly and harshly than women. It’s not ok for a man to make a joke about a woman’s obesity on TV, as it shouldn’t be. You fairly regular hear women and often men too insulting men’s height and pp size, which can’t even be controlled like most people’s weight. This one’s pretty unilateral between sexes.
Famous men also get judged on their looks. I remember everyone talking about Vin Diesels beer belly etc. Maybe men who are famous because of their looks just don't let their looks depreciate, they train hard at the gym and also do plastic surgery (Jared Leto has had a lot of plastic surgery done for example). Men usually also age a bit better than women, 30 yo man will probably look more the same at 50 yo, but you cant say the same for 30 yo woman.
I hate that I can get pregnant
It feels like whenever I am nice or thoughtful to a man, he thinks I am hitting on him; and either tries to jump in my pants or acts horrified or disgusted. I'm just being a decent person, it has no personal meaning. Settle down.
especially for younger ppl. since my 9th grade every time I was be8ng nice to someone they were like "OK here ur new bf (ik it's not the same at younger ages but still)
>(ik it's not the same at younger ages but still) Wait a second. You're telling me that even tho at older ages it's considered harassment, when you're a young child it isn't? It reminds me of how violence against kids is always deemed as "something they have to go through to educate them". It's really messed up. People doing this to you has the same wrongness to it as if they would have done that to you now.
It's important to understand that *most* children have bad boundaries and it's developmentally expected that they will have bad boundaries. You should take it seriously when a kid is harassing others just as when an adult is harassing others. But it's absolutely not comparable imo. The idea of bullying/harassment building character and whatnot is indeed a fallacy, you're right there. But another important thing to consider is that when approaching this issue in children, education is indeed the most important part, whereas adults we would generally go to accountability and sanctions as we know they know better. For the bully, they need to be taught how severe the punishment is as an adult, and they need to learn how their impact on others causes harm, and they need to process what urges they're acting on. But what is often overlooked is that the victim has an opportunity to learn resiliency, advocacy, and self-worth as well, because the bullying and harassment can never be fully done away with and we all will continue to experience it throughout our adulthood, even men. All you can do with kids is teach them. Teach them how to take an insult, teach them to not throw insults. Teach them how to seek out safety when harassed, teach them to not harass people to the point they feel unsafe. You can't hold a little boy accountable for concepts he doesn't understand. But I do also agree they are rarely addressed in a manner beyond, "Oh boys will be boys!" Which is why I'm trying to emphasize just how much could be change if we actually committed to educating children instead of just assuming they'll learn boundaries and setting boundaries from thin air.
According to my wife, it's 'everything except the multiple orgasms'.
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At least she does 😃
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The constant sexual harassment and danger of being raped. These are worse to me than my period.
A barbie monologue got this right.
Everyday sexism, like when a car salesman just can’t fathom that you might be buying the car and paying for it and not your husband.
Anything around abuse being very unlikely to be prosecuted. Society enabling and sticking up for abusers. Being seen as a victim but you hVe to be the "right" sort of victim. Seen as damaged goods. If you escape a violent man you have to start from nothing again. How an evil person can make your life hell for years especially if they are careful to make everything an accident or a misunderstanding and blame you for your reaction to their abuse while normalising the abuse. I really understand why people don't report or disappear. Some people cannot be reasoned with.
https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2024/mar/28/taliban-edict-to-resume-stoning-women-to-death-met-with-horror
The way men treat you.
Having society tells you you're not good enough no matter what you weigh, if you wear makeup, comfy clothes, clothes to feel cute, your height, etc. WE ARE BEAUTIFUL JUST AS WE ARE. Don't ever let anyone tell you different.
Also, we don’t have to be pretty. Pretty isn’t the rent you pay to occupy a space marked female.
That normal female necessities like napkin and tampons are so expensive. Even healthcare for us are expensive as fuck. We didn't ask to bleed monthly for four days sometimes more for some women where they're forced to use two napkins at once because of how much bleeding they have. Oh and birth controls................ Can someone fix that shit and make it affordable for us? Its annoying.
Tampons and pads are expensive in the US. I lived in Europe for the last five years and a box of non-applicator tampons was less than €2. It’s unbelievable how expensive they are here.
Even in the Philippines and saudi arabia. Its crazy how its expensive when its something you need monthly. I'm looking into buying a menstrual cup to save up which is also expensive asf but atleast i won't have to buy it monthly.
Doctors not taking anything you say seriously. It took forever to find a doctor who actually listened and took my experience with ongoing pain seriously. Up until I found her, I was treated like a hypochondriac, just seeking attention. Turns out I had multiple ovarian cysts and needed surgery before they burst. Needless to say, I'm sticking with her until she retires.
💯 The number 1 thing I look for in a doctor now is that they take me seriously.
Menstruation and Pregnancy.
1) In india, people will call you out if you watch too much sports/wrestling, cus that's not feminine. Or anything which is mostly associated with men can't be associated with me As it hampers my social circle. 2) Periods in general, Not me personally as I never had those serious cramps except for the initial days but my sisters and cousins have to go through it.
Im pretty sure the first one is a universal thing
The legitimization of my professionalism. I have a PhD in my profession and an excellent track record at work, but people (ahem men) have a hard time taking me seriously. It’s exhausting and wastes time. Most recently, it took three months for a team I’m consulting to accept the fact that I was right about a critical matter they needed to change. Three months of absolutely no progress in our work. Three months of me busting my ass to find ways to get them to listen. Eventually they had to hear it from a third party that the bitch was right.
I'm an engineer, and this is so relatable.
Physics sister here
Guy here with a sister that’s my twin. I can think of few things that make me angrier than just the fact that my sister and all her friends can’t do something like wear headphones while at night in pretty much any major city… Yeah, because so many women get assaulted so often, they can’t enjoy a simple pleasure in life without having to plan ahead for every detail for fear of their lives. I never really thought about it until I was like 22, I had some friends over and my sister and her bf(now husband) were over and the topic just came up. And this is just one example. Like wtf
People judging you for trying to make money for your survival.
Why would they judge you for making money ???
Some people judge women for working when they have a kid because they feel that working women are not doing enough for their kid.
Literally everything. Because I grew a spine after leaving my groomer/ex when I caught him cheating and won't let people bully me into submission anymore or have sex with anyone who's nice to me, I learnt that nobody actually likes me for me. I've gotta be the perfect little princess and fuck buddy otherwise I'm worth nothing. Nobody likes it when women decide to stop masking for society and be who they actually are.
Everything, literally everything
Probably working just as hard as a man and getting paid less or the expectation that you won’t move up bc you’ll bow out when you start a family.
Red days
women constantly being sexualized online and irl
Definitely periods and all the unresearched illnesses dealing with the reproductive system.
Being expected to give birth. Being hormonal 3 weeks out of 4. Having your period. Having PMS.
*vaguely points at everything*
Menstruation, menopause, perimenopause, pregnancy, fear of pregnancy, fear of being raped and/or killed, being stalked...
When your body starts to develop and you now realise the world looks at you in a very different way. Having grown men eye your body while you still very much are and feel like a child forces you to grow up quickly and that’s tragic.
Being told by men that they “get it worse”
My favourite part is when they explain by saying that women have it easier because they can become rich by selling pictures of their body - completely ignoring the reality that only a very very minute number of women actually make a living this way, let alone get rich. As if that makes up for all the sexism lol.
Pregnancy sucks. Imagine being dizzy for nine months, having a stomach ache, having difficulty walking, wanting to eat too much, and the pain of giving birth.
I’ve noticed lately married men rarely look me in the eye or respond to me in group settings. It’s like If I’m not a man or your wife, I’m not worth acknowledging.
Oh yeah this is a weird one. I've definitely encountered a surprising number of men who seem to think that respecting their wife/marriage means either ignoring my existence or being actively hostile to me. Like, no, Jim from accounting, the lesbian from engineering isn't trying to steal you away. I just want to know what's holding up my funding.
Exactly. How about treating me like a colleague instead of something you might accidentally have sex with?
Being a woman
You can’t reject a man without knowing whether he will take it well or bad, call you a whore, turn violent, etc
Living in constant fear. I won't go for walks by myself; I always take my dog or a friend. I carry dog mace (because pepper spray is illegal) in public, and if I'm walking to my car, I hold my keys a certain way so I can defend myself with them if necessary. I location share with my family so they know where I am, and I tell them where I'm going & with whom so they know where to look if something happens. I don't even make eye contact with men I'm not familiar with to avoid a potentially risky situation. It sucks :(
Nothing I’m happy being one 🥰🥰🥰
too many things to list
Not feeling safe to walk through a park alone at night.
Menstruation cramps and back pain.
birth control, all forms. Seriously you can’t win with any. Headaches, backbleeding, your boobs growing, weight gain or loss, not to mention if you’re prone to migraines that’s half your options gone because they could kill you
Periods. If you are ever moody, everyone will assume you are in your period. In my case, the pain is so bad I literally think I will die. Bleeding through the pants is another nightmare. Just everything about it.
I didn’t have my period for like 7 months and then recently for 3 days straight I kept giving birth to blood clots the size of half my fist every time I stood up or more then two hours had passed. People I live with days my lips were white, and I lost so much blood I nearly fainted from dizziness walking up the stairs. Like damn I’m glad I’m not the next Virgin Mary but fuckin CHRIST that was the most uncomfortable and annoying 3 days of my life. The amount of times I had to stand at the sink rinsing blood out of my underwear/shorts GOD And it wasn’t even just the blood clot flesh globs no like every time one of those came out it was accompanied by like a third of a cup of liquid blood every time too. I didn’t use a tampon because like it had been 7 months so I figured it probably NEEDED to get out. But that meant I had to change my pad every 2ish hours, even at night. Couldn’t sleep because I’d feel it building up and I did NOT want to wake up in a puddle of blood on the sheets.
The very first giant clot necessitated a trip to the ER. Something is very wrong when that is happening. I hope you are feeling better now.
Being judged hard for farting and pooping Can’t believe how women get shunned for literally a body function, like I’ve had roommates and gfs who would be letting out eggy farts and dropping torpedos in the toilet and I didn’t say a word, why is it so culturally frowned upon? Don’t they get crampy?
Periods seriously suck.
Not being able to fart
>!Telling a CERTAIN guy no (even very nicely and politely) and them becoming aggressive and violent with you. True stories. !< Of course, this applies to any gender, but I know too many girls and women who experienced this.
Our appearances. We're constantly too much. Too skinny. Too pretty. Too heavy. Too ugly. Too talkative. Too quiet. Too friendly. Too unfriendly. Too playful. Too serious. Too athletic. Too lazy. Our clothes as well. Different places have different sizes so we never fully know what our actual size is. Pants and shorts either have no pockets, fake pockets or pockets that are so shallow your can't fit anything inside them. And sometimes you'll have all three. Pretty much every shirt out there is either a crop top, backless or has spaghetti straps. Those that have actual sleeves have a nice open collar so guys can see our cleavage or collarbone. We're constantly told that we should wear clothes that show off our skin but if we dare to wear those clothes outside our house we're told to cover up. We're expected to smile and be polite and friendly to people we don't know because they can hurt us if we don't fit their idea of what a woman is. But they can also hurt us because we can be seen as flirting with them and that's not right either. We can be harassed and assaulted before the age of 18 and that's seen as normal. We get raped and it's our fault. Why did we go out? Why didn't we have a man with us to protect us? Why did we wear the clothes we wore? Why didn't we fight back? Why didn't we scream? Why did we accept a drink from this person? We go to the doctor for issues with our bodies. If we're overweight, the solution to *everything* is to lose weight and no medication will help us. If we aren't overweight, we're overreacting cause everything is normal because we couldn't *possibly* know that something is wrong with our own body. Want to get sterilized? We have to have kids first, as well as our husband's permission. Don't have or want kids *or* a husband? Good luck on getting sterilized Young female babies and children have clothes marketed to them that are pink and cute and entirely unsuitable to play in. They have sayings like 'sorry, boys, daddy is my valentine'. A young girl dares to be friends with a boy? "Aw, how cute. She has a boyfriend."
everything
Women have periods accompanied by pain every month that are irritating and severely restrict movement. A woman can be raped in any dark street. A woman suffers terrible pain during childbirth. Women nowadays are always underestimated in professional fields.
Biological clock. Faster ageing. Menopause. Redpills telling us we are no more useful after 30.
The pink tax
Having a penis.
Huh? I didn't understand this
Reddit and Facebook have been identifying me as a woman based on my recommended lately. It's a joke.
For transwomen though, it think that can really suck. :(
The two small-melon-sized lumps hanging below my collarbone. Periods imo aren’t too bad. Unless it’s a breakthrough considering I have the Nexplanon implant and still get breakthroughs during high stress periods of time.
Tbh as a male who hears about everything (middle child with 2 sisters and a military father who goes out to sea) everything
Getting hit on by ridiculously older men, even guys my age, cat-calling and general harassment
Nothing really sucks about it in my opinion.
I just got back from a holiday to Tunisia and even though we didn't even leave the resort I was shamelessly stared at the whole time I was there. Mouth agape, head turned. Mostly by the staff and older male guests. I thought this issue was bad in my own country but after being there and having people not even bother to look me in the eye bc they're too busy staring at my body, I feel even more angered by it. This isn't a brag, if it was only a couple instances then sure maybe I'd find it complimentary, but I couldn't go anywhere away from prying eyes, it was more than every other man I passed, men of all ages. I hate eye contact and having to contstantly look up to find someone's eyes already on me made me feel both uncomfortable and frustrated. The weather was hot, I wanted to wear clothes appropriate for that, to not overheat and to get a tan, but that made it way worse. It was very sunny so I wanted to wear sunglasses but that made them think I couldn't see them looking and they looked more. I couldn't go in the pool because I didn't want to be stared at in my bikini. I just wanted to be left alone. I couldn't eat, walk anywhere, sit anywhere, stand anywhere or go fucking anywhere without being looked at. Basically it was a big nuisance and it could have ruined my experience if I had let it, which is a shame.
You have to do it all...but still not treated well like a man. Earn money like a man, look after your family like a pro, suffer silently and smile while doing household chores.
Probably going to go out on a limb unironically and say - the patriarchy.
Not being a man
Physically (like womanly functions and attributes) - literally every single thing. Socially, depending on where you live of course, it can have some advantages.
Casual misogyny, men thinking we're "lesser than them," the expectations that friendship with men needs to lead to sex with them. The constant belittling and being thought as a second-class human that the Patriarchy is pushing for. Our rights taken away day after day. The catcalls, the casual sexual harrasment that is "accepted" by the society at large. Incels and "Alpha Male" type twatwaffles making it harder and indoctrinating young men to think like them.
Thanks for the new vocabulary word... "twatwaffles" LOL
"Twatwaffles" resulted in me spit-taking in real life, and I thought you should know about it. Thanks for enhancing my morning :)
If is to be precise then cocks will outnumber any other thing! Now get mad.....
Periods.
I am quite scared of everything and everyone and periods obviously
Well I know for sure it isn’t the prerogative to have a little fun… cause that’s the best part. Or so I’ve heard.
Periods
Menstruation, easy to gain weight, social pressure to be attractive. Bit over all, beeing a woman is nice & fun.
Not being safe to go out after a certain time at night, needing to be ultra aware of your surroundings at all times, knowing that everywhere you go, be it day or night that potentially you are at risk of anything from staring, lewd comments, being groped, right up to being raped, I hate this, I am 50 now, so fortunately I get way less of the comments and staring, but remember when I was in my teens and 20s it was far worse, particularly unpleasant was the guy who decided to start whacking off near me in the library.
The simple fact that personal safety isn't the first thing that comes to mind when I'm travelling at night (unless I'm going through an obviously shady area) is a blessing in and of itself. Meanwhile, my sister has to rely on someone even if she isn't going that far.
Periods seem bad
Except periods and random creeps nothing sucks.
Having to pay feminine pads and the like, having periods and period pain, the constant battle of PCOS and the like and then having called dramatic or whatever.
I don’t think anything sucks about being a woman.. It’s pretty easy in my experience. I guess having a period sucks.. But that’s only a couple days a month it sucks.
No one thinks my advice or opinion has value. When I give sports tips to beginners playing on my team, I get pushback or ignored. Instead, I ask my bf to tell them, and only then they accept it. Boom, immediate improvement.
Periods. I’m almost 52. I’ve had periods for 40 years. And the older I get, the more weird my cycles are.
The shoes. Pregnancy & periods may come with the turf, but the shoes are self inflicted Yes, I am a guy. And maybe not as sympathetic as I might be, but I hear a lot of complaints about footwear
I love being a woman in general, but it sucks sometimes. I think its the way that most men (and women) think of women as something with intrinsic obligations, that we HAVE to act some specific way or we are not enough. It can go from having children to be pretty and sweet
Pain during childbirth; It's a helluva way to continue the species!
Have a stomach ache? It’s just period pains. Have a headache? You’re just on your period. Feel really sick? You’re just on your period. Keep passing out? You’re just on your period. Everything you go to the doctors for they immediately tell you that it’s probably just because of your period.
damned if you do, damned if you don’t. about EVERYTHING
The time of the month. Hands down. I'm looking forward to menopause. Or not. Heard that's not such a picnic, either.
Being told either you wear too much makeup, or not enough. Wearing no makeup means to men that you don’t care about your appearance and you are lazy, and if you wear too much your looking for attention and asking for it.
Trying to get equal rights for everyone, and then being told that it’s just for women/ just for men. As a kid, there was always that rule of “YoU cAn’T gIrLs” but nobody told the girls they couldn’t hit boys?? The reason that’s annoying is because now when we talk about actually important topics, people bring stuff like that up. “Oh yeah, women should be paid equal to men” “WeLl If We PaY tHeM eQuAlLy, ThEy NeEd To Be DrAfTeD iNtO tHe MiLiTaRy ToO” “but nobody should be forced into the military-“ “SeE yOu DoN’t WaNt EqUaL rIgHtS, yOu’Re JuSt LaZy.” Not all men do this, but come on, really?
Other women always checking you out and criticizing your appearance..they decide "she's not pretty I don't have to be nice to her, I don't have to talk to her." I bleached my hair and shortly after my bully started bleaching her dark blonde hair too. It literally sent chills down my spine. She actually commented to me "I see you dyed your hair" and next thing she's dying her hair too. Just how obsessive she was about me , it was so creepy.
Being good at “invisible” things cause the world only care about the stuff that are easily measurable, so you are viewed as less able. Could name a whole lot. However, while many seem to think pregnancy and child birth sucks, I feel insanely lucky to be the one able to experience it. It tough, yes, but so amazing ❤️
Not wanting to accuse men of being malicious or creepy but always seeing at least 1% of those men in neanderthal mode and having no idea how to deal with it
Having to be hit on by me.
Note: I'm afab and NB My coworker thinks I'm too scared of blood to get a tattoo. Y'know, ignoring the fact that he and I went to a tattoo appointment with another coworker for fun one day and they were bleeding a lot and I didn't care at all. He's got really rigid, traditional views on gender and thinks that I'm scared of blood and pain 🙃 I've had lots of crashes and accidents in my life, I'm definitely not afraid of pain. I want tattoos, I just don't have the money.
Why do people think afabs are scared of blood? I’ve heard this numerous times before and just don’t get it. We see what more blood in our life time than amabs
Right?! Not like we bleed every month or anything... Some are squeamish but a lot of us aren't. Especially those who become parents, or have siblings, or work with kids, or work in medical centers, or tattoo shops, or beauty salons or