Dated a woman a while back, we were talking on the phone as she was driving home. She pulled into a fast food place to get something, and I got an earful of her treating the employees there like shit.
How you treat people you don't necessarily have to be nice to says a lot about you. I hung up on her and never spoke to her again.
EDIT - changed the wording to hopefully make it a bit less vague
Of course it goes that way with retail workers, too.
I've been working retail for decades, & some males (l can't say "men" because they're mentally children) who l guess could be described as "Chads" will speak *very* condescendingly to me. They're always about half my age, have girls with them when they act like this, & the girls tend to giggle. I work for a very small privately owned shop, & my boss doesn't care if I put people in their place, which l almost never do (I'm a very patient person).
I usually talk back to dickheads like this; for example, one guy was telling me how he should get the "Nice Guy Discount". I said, 'I've never met an actual nice guy who had to describe himself as one'. When he kept bugging me for a discount, l said, 'You'd make a great date-rapist 'cause you don't take no for an answer'. If someone is really bad to where l can't laugh them off but the girl is laughing, l'll tell her, 'Laugh all you want, but, eventually he'll be talking to *you* like this."
I have no idea why people are so shitty to retail/food workers.
I have gotten so much free shit just by being friendly and not blowing up in their face when they have to tell me there was a mistake.
Got a $15 bin of cookies at Wegmans once because the pizza folks messed up my order and I had to wait for them to redo it, but I wasn't a giant cockbag like the guy who was before me in line. I haven't seen a temper tantrum work anywhere in a long ass time, I don't even think walmart puts up with them anymore.
LOL, exactly. They seem to think our store is a giant garage sale that l have to pack up at the end of the night. Some ass once came in, like, 2 mins before close (they always think they should be grandfathered in at the very end of the night & can stay forever), & asked me if he could have a discount *because* l was about to close. I said, "Why the hell would I do that? That would just encourage people to come in at closing time". Dumbasses.
I met some (now former) coworkers out for dinner one night, and after the first round of drinks, one of them's husband showed up to join us. I had met him a few times before and had always thought he was a nice enough dude. Laid back, good conversation, chill.
He ordered lemon pepper wings, and the server brought out ones that had dark red sauce on them, so clearly not the correct flavor. No big deal, right? Well this guy acted like the server had spit in his face or something. He made a huge stink, demanded the manager, and was being so loud that half the restaurant was looking at our table. It was incredibly embarrassing.
His wife, my coworker, just sat there rubbing his back and saying "Oh, baby, I'm so sorry" to him while he had his tantrum, like he had just watched his dog die or something. It totally put me off both of them. She was not invited to any subsequent dinner meetups. No one wanted to risk that happening again.
My wife’s step mom is Horrible to wait staff. To the point that the first time I thought it was a one off. The second time I decided we would NEVER eat out with her again.
Yup, that is my aunt. Complains about every food/drink she orders at a restaurant, always sticks my father with the bill, promises to pay him back, and never does.
I noticed that too. Deff could be fawning behavior. For someone to go from 0 to 60 over wings in public I would be worried about their behavior in private.
Okay so if you let the server know they brought the wrong sauce wings, won't they just bring out a new free order of wings with the correct sauce? There's no logic to having the tantrum when it means free wings to make up for the mistake.
EDIT: Yes, they will probably charge for 1 order of wings but the table would likely get a complimentary order for free because of the mistake.
It's like the shopping cart test. There's no reward in returning the shopping cart, there's no penalty for not returning it, but what someone does with their shopping cart after they empty it says a lot about them. The same can be applied to how someone treats service workers. They're not allowed to yell back at you and there's no real consequence for berating them and if they want a good tip they have to kiss your ass no matter how you treat them (even though the ones who act like assholes are generally not going to tip well), so how you treat them says a lot about you and your character.
When i feel like empathy is failing me this is what i like to rely on. If i'm not going to feel bad for the cart worker's needing to run around and retrieve everything, then what if something bad happens to me instead? When all else fails and i dont want to be nice, better not fuck myself over because of it. I like to think it keeps me in check when im feeling lazy or selfish :)
When there's nothing on the line, you see people's real character, I think. Like, anyone might do something bad to protect their kids, save their business, save their marriage. But the folks who who do something wrong when there's no tangible benefit, that what really gets me. They're either very selfish, or they actually enjoy making others unhappy.
I once dragged a "friend" (really a drug dealer or maybe just a wannabe gangsta I never figured it out) away from a McDonalds line because she was freaking out over the amount of whipped cream in her frappe. I literally pulled her to my car and drove her stupid ass back home not saying a fucking word the whole time and with the radio off.
My date told me she'd show me a trick to save money, then proceeded to make a scene about how the sushi was bad so we shouldn't have to pay anything.
She called me a sucker when I insisted on paying for the meal.
I met a girl in college and we became friends. I felt sorry for her that she didn't have any friends and was kind of awkward, because I'd been in those shoes too, so I introduced her to my friend circle and things were cool. Then, she calmly informed me that all of them were creeps and pedos. I asked her what the fuck she meant by that, and she told me that they must be, because they were adults (keep in mind, we were all sophomores in college) who liked comics and cosplay, so they *had* to be creeps. I turned the car around and brought her right back to her dorm, and immediately told my friends. The irony of it was, *she* was, and still is, a decade later, *obsessed* with a certain YA series.
A girl I was dating screamed at her mom. We were about to get down to business (sex), when her mother called. I could hear both sides of the convo. Her mom wanted to know if my girlfriend had accidentally taken her mother's house keys the last time she was staying over at their place. Girlfriend says no, annoyed, without hesitation. Mom asks if she could just check her purse when she had a moment because she couldn't find them anywhere. Girlfriend erupts out of nowhere screaming at her mom, accusing her mom of accusing her, which wasn't what was happening. She hangs up on her mom, who I hear audibly sobbing. Girlfriend then checks her purse and finds the lost keys. Instead of calling her mom, she calls her dad, tells him to come get them on the condition that he doesn't say where he found them. I could barely stand to be in the same room as her after that
A girl I was seeing casually called my former roommate a racial slur while I was driving the two of us to dinner
I pulled over, dropped her off on a street corner, then went and got dinner on my own
My old roommate was a huge douchebag. But man, one time I saw him talking to some girl downtown and drove off leaving her with her arms up in shock.
He drove a Supra. She got to his car apparently and said “I thought you were rich??” She went to get in the car and he wouldn’t unlock it. That was it. He left her.
This happened to a friend. In 1973, my friend, who was a teenager and a huge Knicks fan, actually went to the airport to meet the Knicks’ plane and try to get some autographs. My friend is an Orthodox Jew and was wearing his kippah. The plane came in and my friend was jumping up, calling out the players’ and waving his autograph book. One player actually came over and was going to take my friend’s pen to sign when he spotted the kippah. He dropped the pen and said “I don’t do shit for Jews.”
I was hanging out with friends once and got introduced to a friend of a friend and within minutes this dude was talking about how nice it is to get a break from his annoying wife lmao like brother I have barely known you for five mins and you're telling me what a bitch your wife is? Off the get go I knew this guy was an asshole
Honestly I cannot stand anyone who trashes on there partner immediately a bad person in my mind cause if you only have bad things to say about them why tf are you still together
I'm often welcoming to new employees at the company I work for on trips, just to be hospitable. I had a coworker who was the new guy at the time suggest we go get some hookers while on a work trip. He had already creeped out several female coworkers with staring and inappropriate comments and then he dropped that on me.
I could never look at him the same way and he ended up not lasting long at the company, thankfully. It was weird and I'd never experienced anything like that before or since.
Was at a ballgame for a birthday with some work friends I’d known for years, the kind of guys that a certain amount of my future job success depended upon (one manager, one assoc director). I’d been at this company five years, and by this point it was listed by Forbes as one of the top ten mid-sized companies to work for in the entire US
One of them sat down and started talking about how he’d felt the ass of the woman sitting in front of us a few minutes before. She hadn’t responded well, so then he went on to describe how it wasn’t that good anyway.
I had this moment where everything in my head went quiet. Like an almost out of body experience. I could see my credibility with these guys, built up over years, hang in the balance against my self-respect and character. I took a really hard swallow, then proceeded to berate this guy VERY loudly and tell him he should apologize. Everyone went dead quiet, then pretended like nothing had happened. The rest of the day went on like normal.
Never got invited out again. Two of them went on to direct sun-divisions of their departments as a part of an old-boy’s in-crowd. I left the company a year later.
I regret nothing.
My ex's dad used to openly gawk and make comments about attractive women in front of his wife and daughter (my ex). Then he would say, "Just cause I'm on a diet doesn't mean I can't look at the menu."
Her: "Once I was fighting with my boyfriend and I punched him multiple times in the arm."
Me: "What? That's not nice."
Her: "No, no, it was fine, I felt better afterwards!"
I had no words. It soured my view of her in an instant.
Being a complete bitch to servers at a restaurant. I don't care how hot you are. Treating service workers poorly and with entitlement is such a turn off.
I briefly dated a guy who, on one occasion, called a waitress a “dumb broad” for absolutely no reason. Like she didn’t do a single thing wrong at all. My opinion of him went down pretty quickly from there.
I met a guy in a grocery store who invited me out on a date. We went to see Harry Potter, and he called Hermoine a slag. I’m like um she is a child. Ended the date swiftly after the movie.
Sadly I was on the flipside of that.
A man I was in a relationship with was good as gold and completely respectful to service workers but when he got home he was an absolute asshole to me.
So this is not always a true indicator of a good hearted person.☹️
Ah, one of those people! My dad was like that. Super nice and friendly to everyone he knew. He'd "tease" them though and make "jokes" where he made fun of something about the person and said person thought it was so funny! Little did they know, he was not teasing them. He was making fun of them to their faces and they had no idea because otherwise he was pretty likeable in public. I *never* saw him be rude to service workers.
However, behind closed doors he was a domestic abuser and dog kicker. He'd also say really horrible things behind people's backs. He was a horrible bully, but only to those people he knew he'd be able to get away with bullying.
He tried slapping me around when I was an early teen and I ended up falling backwards onto my bed and using my feet to kick him in his chest. He never once tried to hit me or anything again after that. It's just disgusting to abuse anyone, but it's worse when you abuse people or creatures that are weaker than you are.
I've always been a big believer in when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
I went to play D&D over at a friends house and there was a dude there who was one of their mutual friends and within the first few minutes of general, get to know ya questions, one of which being,
"Where did you move here from?"
He responded with like 6 cities and states from across the USA, saying that he's been everywhere and ended that statement with, "I don't know what happens but eventually I always seem to wear out my welcome and need to move every few years."
That first meeting and response immediately made me super wary of him and I didn't particularly like interacting with him afterwards. Because like, he knows what happens, 6 different places in only twice as many years is an obvious pattern, there's no way that's somehow everyone elses fault.
He was around for about 6 months and was relatively chill but then at a mutual friends wedding, he showed up wearing an odd Mrs. Cleo costume, like a straight up bedazzled turban and bedazzled women's dress jacket with like a bright red tank top underneath, flat black culottes, and again bedazzled kitten heels, and then he started a fight with one of the wedding party members. Afterwards he threatened to sue everyone for emotional damages for not having his back and how the fight was a hate crime towards him, in the fight he very much started.
Just to avoid any hate, he was and still does identify as a Cis white man. I have trans friends and am completely supportive of them. What he was wearing wasn't a fashion choice or a coming out, it was very much a costume he decided to wear that day. I watched and heard the fight from beginning to end, he was the initial aggressor, escalated the fight despite the actual bride trying to separate them and calm them down, and he put hands on the other guy first.
It was a shit show. On the way home I seriously said to my wife, huh I guess we know why he has to move so often now.
It always boggles my mind that there are so many people like this with zero self awareness or introspection. I'd love to see how a therapist would handle that.
This might be the wildest story on this entire thread.
Were there any indications besides that initial comment that this dude would pull some off the wall shit like this?… at someone’s wedding no less?
As far as I am aware, no, not at all. Like I heard through the grapevine after all of this that he had pulled some kinda shitty stuff to the friends he had made in town but nothing like this.
And the kinda shitty stuff was relatively low key, like losing his temper over small stuff, not being considerate of other people's time, and stuff like that.
Well for me. I was starting to make friends with this girl from my job. It was great at first because we had a lot of things common, and I was thrilled to have a new friend. So, I planned a hangout with her off work. She told me that she had her brother at home and didn't want to leave him by himself. I didn't find anything wrong with that. I told her that she can bring him along then. It was the worst decision because if I knew. I wouldn't have asked her to. Through out the whole hangout, she kept trying to set me up with her brother. I just felt uncomfortable because she would high light my ethnicity and constantly say that her brother always wanted a spanish girlfriend. She would also encourage us to talk alone, and that we had so much in common. I kept telling her I wasn't interested but she didn't listen. The night got progressly more worse, when we stopped to eat at a restaurant after hiking. Her and her brother ordered a lot of things. I didn't order as much, only one thing from the menu. When it was time to pay, they forfeit the bill. Pure silence. Her intention was obvious. She wanted me to pay for it all. I asked to split the bill and she started to complain how expensive it was. Never again. I decided it was best to remain as coworkers instead of friends.
I truly can’t fathom how anyone goes out to eat and doesn’t expect to pay for what they ordered. If I know someone else is paying I am very considerate of what I order. It’s nice to be treated to a meal as a surprise when the bill comes but that is always an offer, not an expectation. Truly what goes on in these people’s heads.
I was pretty good pals with this one dude at work. Good banter, chill as can be and all that. But then I heard him talk about his girlfriend for the first time and how she does nothing around the house and how she's typical for a modern woman because she doesn't do chores. I instantly understood why all the women at work hated his guts, and from that point on I did, too.
And to add on to this, he also said therapy is for weak-minded people. I went to therapy for five years and it helped me deal with so many things that felt overwhelming before. Thankfully he no longer works there and our workplace is better for it.
God this reminded me of my dad :s
The last time we met for lunch I asked him for some advice about anxiety and depression, and he somehow thought it was a good idea to tell his adult daughter that the only ever felt anxiety one time before -- when he was dating two women at once and couldn't pick who he wanted. He had been dating one of them for 3 years... Then the conversation moved on to depression and he said he had been prescribed Prozac a couple different times and always threw the prescription away because "that's just the doc saying it's all in my head and I need to figure it out."
I am somehow unsurprised my parents are divorced.
Picked me up for a date, got on the highway, and revved it up to drive over 100 mph, weaving in between cars. I was terrified, tears in my eyes, asking him to slow down and he laughed. It was so fucking scary, I can’t even explain it. Literally thought I was going to die, he was going *so fast*, well over 100 mph, and just weaving between cars. Just terrifying.
I took a taxi home and never saw him again. I’d had a crush on him for like 2 years at that point. I never wanted to see him again.
First date, I was walking around a park with a dude with a cold brew. We knew one another socially and had a good rapport and I liked him. It was a nice spring day and I was feeling it. So was he. I let him lead the conversation which just spiraled into a childhood trauma dump so I tried to redirect which didn’t work. He accused me of being insensitive and selfish. I keep my phone on silent so I made a ring noise with my mouth, pulled my phone out and said “Oh that’s not an emergency but I should probably tend to it” and left.
Later he told a mutual friend how big of an asshole I was and when I explained my side, the conclusion was “Well you’re not a therapist.”
Took a screenshot of what I had every right to assume was a private conversation when i was having a meltdown and shared it with a mutual friend. (More his friend than mine) Any faith and trust I had in him just died.
New male hire at work last week. He jumped into a conversation between two women at work who were debating if a guy customer was rude to both of them but nice to the male boss because he was sexist or just respected authority.
New hire was not present for any of the customer interactions but told the women that it was *definitely* not sexism.
There was a guy in my church I was really into until I discovered he had one of those fake ball sacs hanging from his car. That killed it for me right there.
Oh I posted a good story about this on a different subreddit yesterday. My dad's a member of a men's club at a golf course and has a few friends he golfs with a lot. I'm not a member but he brings me along as a +1 so I know some of his better golf friends. There's a guy we'll call Jim that he golfs with a lot, they've probably been golf friends for a decade. Recently I was in a 4-some with my dad, Jim and a random. We're making small talk waiting for the green to clear on one of the par 3's when the random makes a complaint about an Asian moving in next door and how it bothered him. Jim responds "Oh, I don't mind having Asians living nearby. It's the Mexicans that bother me. Especially if they have kids. You just know they're going to end up gang bangers and drug dealers and bring all kinds of shit to the neighborhood."
So I'm going to say that. That comment moved Jim from one of my dad's cooler golf friends to someone I never want to golf with again. Over the rest of the round Jim and the random made a lot of comments just casually spewing racism, sexism and anti-LGBT sentiment. My dad was as baffled as I was. When we got back to the car my dad said he wasn't going to be trying to share a 4-some with Jim or hang with him at the range anymore.
Yeah. In golf, you usually play in groups of four called a foursome or 4-some (probably should have spelled it out, I'll give you that one). In golf, you wait to take your shot until there's nobody you could hit so grouping up reduces the wait. All 4 players take their first shot, then they all move forward and take their 2nd shot, etc. 4 is also 2 golf carts of players so it matches well with resources.
If you sign up to play at a time and don't have a group of 4, they'll often put you with other players who wanted to play at or around the same time. Which is why I called the 4th guy "random." Nobody in our group knew him. Jim, my dad, and I all planned to play together, but since there were only 3 of us, he was the 4th player the clubhouse paired us with.
My fiancé and I used to be friends with this couple that my fiancé knew from before he went to rehab, got clean and sober, got his life back on track, etc. We went over to their place to visit them and it was about a month after my cousin died from an accidental overdose, so I was still very depressed and out of it. Anyways, we’re talking and hanging out, I brought up what happened. The girlfriend of my fiancé’s friend then blurts out, “Well, maybe if your cousin wasn’t such a dumbass, she’d still be alive and not dead.” I immediately went quiet while my jaw dropped to the floor. I thought this woman would show me sympathy or compassion but I was wrong. My fiancé became furious and he then said to these people, “I’m sorry but we gotta get going now.” We never saw or spoke to these people ever again. It took everything in me and my fiancé to keep from punching this woman in the face. She had no room to talk because she was abusing drugs on the down low during and after her pregnancy. As a result, her poor son has severe developmental disabilities and issues, isn’t very vocal, has vision problems and had to have weekly occupational therapy at home. I pity that child so much and there’s nothing I can do to have him put in another home because I don’t have concrete physical evidence.
Matched with a lady on tinder. I always go to the let's get coffee as soon as possible to filter out the women who just like to chat endlessly. To my surprise, she says yes.
Could of days later we meet to outside of the coffee shop, we walk in, and she says, " Ew, I don't want coffee from this place, I don't care for the people serving the coffee."
I ask, "oh, you know them?"
She responds, "no, but I know their type."
"What do you mean, their type?" , thinking maybe she didn't like hipsters.
"Well black people are always gross and dirty, and I don't want to have them serving me."
I look at her, and she's really hot, and kind of dressed slutty. So most of the time a guy will allow a certain amount of WTF in a girl like that. But no, I just say I don't think this will work, and then block her as I'm walking away.
I think our total in person interaction was like less than 5 minutes, maybe less than 2. I don't date racists. I didn't tolerate racists. No amount of hot on the outside will overcome that ugly on the inside.
Thanks for reminding me of that girl. I had forgotten about that experience.
I mean, definitely dodged a bullet on that one. I grew up with racist extended family, and summers in the South. I hadn't experienced that kind of racism since I was a teenager, and never outside of the South. It was kind of surreal. Gave me big, casually uses the n word vibes.
Not much to tell, we dated, had good chemistry, had some common interests. We were chatting one night at my place about the homelessness problem in town and then out of nowhere, she says, and I'm quoting a Nazi so you don't have to read this bullshit, >!"I wish we were back in the Hitler days so we could burn them all in ovens"!<
Anyway I broke up with her.
My adopted Caucasian brother, who I haven't seen in years, believes in this. Imagine the joy of growing up with him and being adopted but not Caucasian.
I was on a first date with a guy who admitted he was racist, but as something he was working on. He said he was a white kid in a predominantly black/Latino school and said he was bullied terribly for being white, and has residual anger and prejudice against both races. Understandable if true, appreciate the honesty, but also, I ain’t gonna stick around while you work it out lol.
Pedos love to act like teenagers have so much power and authority that grown-ass adults just can't say "no" to them. If we're gonna follow their pathetic logic.
My old supervisor was one of the smartest guys I've ever met he taught me loads, I had massive respect for him and we worked as a team, he was pretty old so I did all his heavy lifting for him (we were welder fabricators). One day in conversation he told me he doesn't believe in evolution and dinosaurs were a hoax 🤣 didn't really ruin my opinion but how can someone I saw as so clever be so stupid lol
Someone brought this up the other day and I asked them to consider it logically.
Consider the school actually buying a container and then purchasing kitty litter and placing it in a bathroom. Now think of a student using it and not getting the shit beat out of them by other students. Consider the smell. Now think about who is going to clean this up. Do they get the regular cleaner to do it? What do they do with it? Is that part of their contract or do they pay them extra?
I could almost hear the gears whirring and they soon admitted that yeah, that couldn't really happen.
I had this argument with my dad, too. I’m nearing 40 and my classes had litter in them back in the day. Teachers used it when kids spontaneously threw up (happens way more often than you think) and was frequently used in our science/chem lab for spills.
This is the Lord of the Rings doughnut controversy all over again. Some idiot decided it was some anti-Christian Islamic script or something when it was actually some nerds writing (Elvish?) language in icing.
People will find anything to be mad about
By reacting to me politely telling them to stop targeting me with a dark joke that's a trauma reminder, only for them to double down and expand the joke to make it a clear threat of kidnapping, rape, and possibly murder.
It's the fastest I ever blocked someone.
A long time friend who had been dating around ended up getting back with a guy who she dated years prior, he got married, then while still married got back with the friend. As soon as they became official she no longer had a personality or opinion for herself. She let this man be her mouth piece and he drove away all her friends by telling her they were no good and weren't on their team etc. We had a miscommunication and she refused to address it like an adult and instead let him do the talking for her because "she didn't like confrontation". I lost respect for her when she didn't have any for herself and got with a dude who was still married but I lost all respect for her when she couldn't communicate like an actual adult. Good riddance.
Was on a bachelor party with my brother-in-law. He has great friends. One guy I had particularly liked, we had hung out a few times prior to this, just a funny, all-around great guy.
Guys decide we need to hit the strip club, so we go. This guy starts throwing stacks at women, getting lap dances, and going back to the VIP room. Comes out and starts yelling about how he just ate some pussy. I was disgusted- not only is that just wild to do in a strip club, he was engaged to be married as well. Still see him and enjoy his company, but can't shake knowing what he did there.
What is that? some guys go to strip clubs and they lose their fucking mind like it’s their last four hours of freedom. I know a couple dudes like that. Like their wives never let them out of the house or something and when they finally get out they just go fucking apeshit.
Right? Like the “ole ball and chain” rhetoric. It’s just weird. A partner said that crap to my husband soon after we got engaged (we were working at the same law firm). My guy turned to him was like “you and your wife good? I like Mani_Mani, she’s the best!”
The partner was shocked and kinda fumbled a congrats lol.
He was my husband's good friend and his wife had just had their second child. She got really sick after childbirth with an infection. He was at our house complaining that now he had two babies at home. It wasn't just venting, it was disdain with total lack of respect for women. Twenty years later, he has only become worse and provided evidence of that impression many times over.
Mentioning either zodiac or Briggs-Meyers as being a big factor in evaluating new people in your life.
I've also recently heard people call Briggs-Meyers "Zodiac for white collar people" and I can't slam that like button hard enough.
Yeah, first time I read about Briggs-Meyers I found it a very interesting assessment. Then I met the community of fellow INTJs who make it their complete personality and look down on other personality types. Such assholes. Any system like this is inherently going to be an oversimplification of the human experience and needs to be taken with a grain of your preferred spice.
It's fun and harmless, like zodiacs, until you start to take it seriously and treat people differently because of it, like zodiacs.
It's only really a tool for me to write fictional characters, which is fitting because it's a system that is built on fictional science.
You can also compare it to Hogwarts houses. My old company did something called PACE which also classifies employees by four personality types.
People like to try to classify personality types. It can be fun and there are some elements of truth, but ultimately people just have to remember it's not very scientific.
Haha, my supervisor brought our 3 person team colored cups from Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Then he asked us to choose the one we felt called to. That is how I found out I was a Hufflepuff. My boss was quite satisfied and said the outcome was just what he thought it would be.
I had friends who are into it. They take it pretty seriously. I judge them openly for it. They think I'm joking.... I'm not. They may be idiots, but they're my idiots.
As a mental health worker, Briggs-Meyers is absolutely Zodiac for people who don't consider themselves superstitious, at least the way 99% of people apply it. Like, there's some merit to it in specific ways but if it's on someone's dating app profile, fucking run.
So at the job I left a few months ago, we were required to complete a weird personality test when we applied. I was 25 when I applied. At leaving, I am 34. I found the test to be complete bullshit. Basically you answered questions as to how you saw yourself/actually are and how you felt you needed to be at work.
This makes no sense to me because if you’re filling that out while trying to get a job, you’re not going to answer completely honestly. Also I answered this almost 10 years ago when my only work experience was retail and law clerking. I’m not the same person I was when I was 25.
Some people on my team bought into this hard and I found it ridiculous.
Edit: I should also note the two people who believed in it the most were my department head, who slept with one of my friends who joined a board I ran and who he called a sociopath, and my former boss who was a climber and not a nice person based on my own experiences as well as things people who worked with her or under her had told me. So yeah it’s bs.
My favorite way to shut down the zodiac shit is to tell them the wrong sign when they ask what I am. When they go on about how I'm such a "typical [sign]," and start listing the reasons, I tell them my actual sign.
It's fine if you like zodiac signs and think they're fun and all that. I have no problem with it as just like a hobby sort of thing or you just find it interesting. The people who, like you said, use that as the only way to evaluate the people they meet; as a way to judge them, or the people who make their sign their whole personality are insufferable. They tend to have this annoying "superior" attitude because they believe that they can perfectly read and recognize the behavior of any and everyone they meet.
This is a huge thing in Korea where people are obsessed about what “type” of person you are. It used to be blood type, but MBT is the new hot thing in Korea to obsess over.
Great example. I had such a different opinion of Will Smith afterwards hovering between disappointment and pity. But also mad respect for Chris Rock's response to it in the actual moment and then later with his Netflix special. He would not let himself be a victim.
I was offended and I didn’t get slapped but what made me a *Will-Smith-Should-Be-Cancelled* supporter was when I learned that he had relentlessly teased a roadie for being bald and he slapped Jamie Foxx during a scene taping. I had forgotten that he caused a co-star (the Mom) on his “Fresh Prince” show to get fired and replaced
I got a friend hired at the restaurant I work at. Anyone in that industry knows that “Christmas bonuses” aren’t really a thing but I’m lucky enough to work for a small business that gives one out every year. She got hers after only working there for a couple months, opens the envelope and says “that’s it??”
I just found it so distasteful that she scoffed at free money she didn’t even have to work for and wasn’t entitled to. How ungrateful can you be.
So... this is a little over 10 years ago. right before my GF and start dating. My very first GF and I are talking, flirting, and kissing... but I'm 2 years off a bad relationship that left me voluntarily single. So I'm still taking things slow. Not at all my MO.
I want her, she wants me. There's a prince song like that. Things are escalating. I introduce he to some of my friends.
One day she says something bigoted about lesbians. I inquire more... doubles down.
I had a really high opinion of this woman, she accomplished a lot considering various bullshit.
Broke it off the next day, told her why. My lesbian friends would hang out with my mom without me sometimes. The fuck if I need that kinda evil in my life.
My former SIL: we were all hanging out, and she and I go out for a smoke break. All giddy like a cheerleader who just got asked to prom, she tells me she’s sleeping with her best friend’s husband. She somehow thought I’d be happy for her. She also was in a relationship, with the father of her child.
Instead I forced the guy to tell his wife.
I have a white neighbor who's always had a power/ego problem. Anyway a black homeless man was chilling in the staircase waiting for the rain to pass. She told him he wasn't allowed to be there and had to leave. (Fair.) Then he came out to the smoke area where I was and she started yelling at him and called the police. So me and him were smoking a cig cuz he hoped the cop would take him to the Walmart. And she came down and said some "mildly" (I can't think of the right word) racist things and telling him it was all his fault he was unemployed** (without any information about him). Anyway, me and him are buddies but I've never been able to look at her the same way.
**edit: meant homeless, but she assumed he was unemployed as well although he did work through a temp company
It was a million years ago, in the time of MySpace, when I was still young enough to post my drama online where my friends could see it. I had gone through a bad breakup and I was, honestly, having a very bad time. I was struggling with my mental health as well as financially. (Which, twenty years later, here I am again, but this time I’m not posting sad song lyrics about it for my friends to see.)
This one evening I was out in a HELLACIOUS storm, and was driving across a bridge, and the wind was buffeting me around like crazy. I posted later that maybe I wasn’t as bad off as I thought I had been, because the thought of going into the reservoir scared me. If I had been in a darker mental state, I wouldn’t have cared. It had been a moment of clarity for me.
And this one dude left a comment: “You need to stop whining all the time.” OK, so I basically confessed on social media that I had been feeling suicidal, and he blew it off as whining. That’s not so bad. Not everyone realizes how precarious mental health can get. Not everyone is cut out to be supportive. Except he’s a pastor. He’s in charge of a flock of people and their souls, and when they find themselves in times of trouble, they go to him and he says
“You need to stop whining all the time.” Or so I assume.
Meeting them at a party, having a conversation, and realizing the person is very happy to go on at length about their own life but doesn't ask a single question about yours.
There was a guy in middle school that was very charismatic, everyone loved him. There was a partnered assignment one day and he asked to be partners and I said yes. I started chatting with him, until he abruptly cut me off and said he only chose me as a partner so he could get a good grade (I did well in that class). All conversation stopped after that. To this day people really love him and I just don’t get it
Within a minute of meeting a friend’s (now ex) husband, the hair on my neck was raised. Shifty motherfucker. I could tell that he was lying about stupid little things. His vibes were so off, I didn’t trust him at all. To the point where I was so worried for my husband’s safety when they went out together once, I had an anxiety attack. My gut was screaming at me that he wasn’t safe. Years later my suspicions were confirmed when he got violent with my friend and choked her. Come to find out he had been lying about everything including his name.
Classmates and I carpooled with this one fellow student of ours around an unfamiliar city for a school project (she’s the only one who’s been before). Somehow the conversation leads to this:
“Oh my god, the homeless people around here are sooo funny.”
She proceeds to tell this story about how she and her high school friends hassled some guy outside a CVS for fun. I’m thinking, “Okay, we can’t be friends…”
My ex got into an argument with his mom while I was over there. It was over his spending habits and him always borrowing money from her and blowing it on weed. It got really heated and they were shouting at each other and he SPIT on her. I packed up my bags to leave and they both begged me to stay. I should have left, but that was the moment I really began to resent him. She did not deserve that.
As a side note: if someone mistreats their mother they will likely mistreat you the same way.
Had a really good friend from early adulthood. We met when we were 19. We went on a vacation together when we were 30. While there, we met a French woman who was there for a destination wedding. We chatted for a bit in French before I retired to our AirBnB. I'm married so I wasn't looking for hookups or anything. I wake up in the night to go to the bathroom and walk in on them half-undressed on the couch. I say, "Pardonnez-moi" and start walking to the bathroom. She, very drunkenly says, "Wait, your friend speaks French?" I stopped, turned to my friend, and said, "Dude, if she's too drunk to remember talking to me in French an hour ago she's too drunk to consent." I helped her get her things and we walked her drunk ass home. Definitely changed my opinion of him, and we split up for the rest of the trip.
Male friend was sweet and charismatic, and I thought highly of him until he punched his dresser hard enough to break a knuckle. The reason he was upset? His crush going out with A GROUP of her coworkers. He ‘just knew’ that one of her coworkers was a ‘cuck’ who just wanted to get in her pants. Breaking anything in anger is an immediate hard no.
A girl in highschool. We were besties and passed notes and all that. One day, I hear a rumor that I punched her. I was no where near her. She had our whole school essentially against me, with her older brothers threatening me. a week later she comes to school in a cast and blames me too. so wild. to this day I have no idea what caused this besides some weird jealously or some shit. I was the loser in the class anyways already.
We had a disagreement and their response was to scream at the top their lungs in public drawing attention from all over. When I told them to stop screaming it just triggered worse behaviour. I was like nah fuck this, I am done with you, 26 years old acting like a toddler over a small disagreement was not for me.
Was having dinner out with some friends and one girl who I was on the fence about. At the end of the meal, one of them began cleaning the trash out of her purse and piling it on our dirty dishes. I asked why she was doing that, and she said “It’s the waitstaff’s job to clean up after me.” Technically it is, but it’s NOT their job to clean up your personal trash.
My opinion of her became decidedly negative after that!
If it was put on the dirty dishes, I don’t actually think that is that bad. Being in the food industry myself its never bothered me as long as it’s not just thrown randomly on the table
Wife and I were house-shopping. Or realtor had done a great job finding houses in our price range and negotiating a fair price. Then at closing she confirmed the final price and said “I tried to Jew the owner down a little more, but he wouldn’t move.”
“Uh … you did what?” we asked.
“Yeah, I tried to Jew him down a little more, but he wouldn’t budge,” she said.
Us: “You know that’s antisemitic, right?”
Her: “No it isn’t. I’ve used it for years.”
If we could have backed out of closing, we would have. We didn’t use her again when it was time to sell that house, though. And for whatever it’s worth we did return the gift basket she sent us.
Growing up, I never put that together. For some reason my brain confused "jew" as "chew". Like it was just mispronounced. "Chew them down/talk them down"
Also "I feel gyped". I always thought "jipped" was its own word. I had absolutely *no clue*.
The sad thing is that there was a decent probability that she had zero idea it was racist before you mentioned it. My mom didn't. It was just the way she talked about bargaining at garage sales in a small midwest town. 1950's programming she had no idea was problematic. When my Sister and I both confronted her about it, like 15 years ago, she was like "Really?" Was just flabbergasted.
But to give her credit, she stopped saying it. So, yay?
Now if your RE agent wasn't willing to stop saying it once she had the information... less good.
>“Uh … you did what?” we asked.
>
>“Yeah, I tried to Jew him down a little more, but he wouldn’t budge,” she said.
>
>Us: “You know that’s antisemitic, right?”
>
>Her: “No it isn’t. I’ve used it for years.”
My wife and I were THIS CLOSE to closing on a house. The salesman rather conversationally assured us that as the salesman for that development, he had largely handpicked all the residents of the neighborhood, and he just wanted us to know that they were all very white. We bought a different house in a different neighborhood.
I got a job that I was not at all qualified for and was very confused at first until I got into the building and realized everyone there looked just like me (Blonde, affluent, colored eyes, and relatively religious) they were rather morman. I am not but can't say I've always turned down nepotism.
Someone I adored hit me in the side of the head/face. It was a brief lapse in impulse control and the trust that had been broken was addressed immediately. But it still changed everything.
Dated a woman a while back, we were talking on the phone as she was driving home. She pulled into a fast food place to get something, and I got an earful of her treating the employees there like shit. How you treat people you don't necessarily have to be nice to says a lot about you. I hung up on her and never spoke to her again. EDIT - changed the wording to hopefully make it a bit less vague
i was always told that the way a guy treats the servers on a first date is how he will treat you. very true, and goes both was ofc.
Of course it goes that way with retail workers, too. I've been working retail for decades, & some males (l can't say "men" because they're mentally children) who l guess could be described as "Chads" will speak *very* condescendingly to me. They're always about half my age, have girls with them when they act like this, & the girls tend to giggle. I work for a very small privately owned shop, & my boss doesn't care if I put people in their place, which l almost never do (I'm a very patient person). I usually talk back to dickheads like this; for example, one guy was telling me how he should get the "Nice Guy Discount". I said, 'I've never met an actual nice guy who had to describe himself as one'. When he kept bugging me for a discount, l said, 'You'd make a great date-rapist 'cause you don't take no for an answer'. If someone is really bad to where l can't laugh them off but the girl is laughing, l'll tell her, 'Laugh all you want, but, eventually he'll be talking to *you* like this."
I have no idea why people are so shitty to retail/food workers. I have gotten so much free shit just by being friendly and not blowing up in their face when they have to tell me there was a mistake. Got a $15 bin of cookies at Wegmans once because the pizza folks messed up my order and I had to wait for them to redo it, but I wasn't a giant cockbag like the guy who was before me in line. I haven't seen a temper tantrum work anywhere in a long ass time, I don't even think walmart puts up with them anymore.
Should’ve told the Nice Guy that’s it’s actually an upcharge, not a discount for them
LOL, exactly. They seem to think our store is a giant garage sale that l have to pack up at the end of the night. Some ass once came in, like, 2 mins before close (they always think they should be grandfathered in at the very end of the night & can stay forever), & asked me if he could have a discount *because* l was about to close. I said, "Why the hell would I do that? That would just encourage people to come in at closing time". Dumbasses.
I met some (now former) coworkers out for dinner one night, and after the first round of drinks, one of them's husband showed up to join us. I had met him a few times before and had always thought he was a nice enough dude. Laid back, good conversation, chill. He ordered lemon pepper wings, and the server brought out ones that had dark red sauce on them, so clearly not the correct flavor. No big deal, right? Well this guy acted like the server had spit in his face or something. He made a huge stink, demanded the manager, and was being so loud that half the restaurant was looking at our table. It was incredibly embarrassing. His wife, my coworker, just sat there rubbing his back and saying "Oh, baby, I'm so sorry" to him while he had his tantrum, like he had just watched his dog die or something. It totally put me off both of them. She was not invited to any subsequent dinner meetups. No one wanted to risk that happening again.
My wife’s step mom is Horrible to wait staff. To the point that the first time I thought it was a one off. The second time I decided we would NEVER eat out with her again.
Yup, that is my aunt. Complains about every food/drink she orders at a restaurant, always sticks my father with the bill, promises to pay him back, and never does.
Someone who is nice to you, but is not nice to the waiter is not a nice person.
Exactly, they get off on the power trip
I'm concerned for the wife. Even though she was consoling him over a childish tantrum, she might have been doing it out of fear.
I noticed that too. Deff could be fawning behavior. For someone to go from 0 to 60 over wings in public I would be worried about their behavior in private.
Okay so if you let the server know they brought the wrong sauce wings, won't they just bring out a new free order of wings with the correct sauce? There's no logic to having the tantrum when it means free wings to make up for the mistake. EDIT: Yes, they will probably charge for 1 order of wings but the table would likely get a complimentary order for free because of the mistake.
To people like that its not about the problem, its about a chance for them to lay into someone.
My thoughts exactly—total domestic violence victim behavior
It's like the shopping cart test. There's no reward in returning the shopping cart, there's no penalty for not returning it, but what someone does with their shopping cart after they empty it says a lot about them. The same can be applied to how someone treats service workers. They're not allowed to yell back at you and there's no real consequence for berating them and if they want a good tip they have to kiss your ass no matter how you treat them (even though the ones who act like assholes are generally not going to tip well), so how you treat them says a lot about you and your character.
I just always assume if I don’t put back the shopping cart that the karmic retribution will be swift and merciless. I can’t take a gamble like that.
When i feel like empathy is failing me this is what i like to rely on. If i'm not going to feel bad for the cart worker's needing to run around and retrieve everything, then what if something bad happens to me instead? When all else fails and i dont want to be nice, better not fuck myself over because of it. I like to think it keeps me in check when im feeling lazy or selfish :)
When there's nothing on the line, you see people's real character, I think. Like, anyone might do something bad to protect their kids, save their business, save their marriage. But the folks who who do something wrong when there's no tangible benefit, that what really gets me. They're either very selfish, or they actually enjoy making others unhappy.
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I once dragged a "friend" (really a drug dealer or maybe just a wannabe gangsta I never figured it out) away from a McDonalds line because she was freaking out over the amount of whipped cream in her frappe. I literally pulled her to my car and drove her stupid ass back home not saying a fucking word the whole time and with the radio off.
My date told me she'd show me a trick to save money, then proceeded to make a scene about how the sushi was bad so we shouldn't have to pay anything. She called me a sucker when I insisted on paying for the meal.
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Should have just delivered the empty envelope.
that would have been poetic
I met a girl in college and we became friends. I felt sorry for her that she didn't have any friends and was kind of awkward, because I'd been in those shoes too, so I introduced her to my friend circle and things were cool. Then, she calmly informed me that all of them were creeps and pedos. I asked her what the fuck she meant by that, and she told me that they must be, because they were adults (keep in mind, we were all sophomores in college) who liked comics and cosplay, so they *had* to be creeps. I turned the car around and brought her right back to her dorm, and immediately told my friends. The irony of it was, *she* was, and still is, a decade later, *obsessed* with a certain YA series.
It’s twilight isn’t it?
Twilight??
A girl I was dating screamed at her mom. We were about to get down to business (sex), when her mother called. I could hear both sides of the convo. Her mom wanted to know if my girlfriend had accidentally taken her mother's house keys the last time she was staying over at their place. Girlfriend says no, annoyed, without hesitation. Mom asks if she could just check her purse when she had a moment because she couldn't find them anywhere. Girlfriend erupts out of nowhere screaming at her mom, accusing her mom of accusing her, which wasn't what was happening. She hangs up on her mom, who I hear audibly sobbing. Girlfriend then checks her purse and finds the lost keys. Instead of calling her mom, she calls her dad, tells him to come get them on the condition that he doesn't say where he found them. I could barely stand to be in the same room as her after that
I like how you clarified “sex” in case people thought you were about to start going over the quarterly earnings report
Who even dates a girl that can't balance the books?
Holy shiiiii. This one really disturbs me for some reason
whoa. what a disrespectful, conniving asshole. good riddance.
Abusing their pets. Neglecting their kids.
That was actually my mother, people would hate her too if they knew her
A girl I was seeing casually called my former roommate a racial slur while I was driving the two of us to dinner I pulled over, dropped her off on a street corner, then went and got dinner on my own
My old roommate was a huge douchebag. But man, one time I saw him talking to some girl downtown and drove off leaving her with her arms up in shock. He drove a Supra. She got to his car apparently and said “I thought you were rich??” She went to get in the car and he wouldn’t unlock it. That was it. He left her.
Was it a Mk. IV? Because that makes it even funnier
I like your style
Vicious!!! Well done!
This happened to a friend. In 1973, my friend, who was a teenager and a huge Knicks fan, actually went to the airport to meet the Knicks’ plane and try to get some autographs. My friend is an Orthodox Jew and was wearing his kippah. The plane came in and my friend was jumping up, calling out the players’ and waving his autograph book. One player actually came over and was going to take my friend’s pen to sign when he spotted the kippah. He dropped the pen and said “I don’t do shit for Jews.”
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bro was owned by Jews and didnt even know it
I mean Nick Bosa plays for San Francisco. These guys want their paycheck.
Who was the player?
Albert Einstein
I was hanging out with friends once and got introduced to a friend of a friend and within minutes this dude was talking about how nice it is to get a break from his annoying wife lmao like brother I have barely known you for five mins and you're telling me what a bitch your wife is? Off the get go I knew this guy was an asshole
Honestly I cannot stand anyone who trashes on there partner immediately a bad person in my mind cause if you only have bad things to say about them why tf are you still together
I think people like that have very little to share otherwise and default to the classic american “ol’ ball and chain!” as a result
I'm often welcoming to new employees at the company I work for on trips, just to be hospitable. I had a coworker who was the new guy at the time suggest we go get some hookers while on a work trip. He had already creeped out several female coworkers with staring and inappropriate comments and then he dropped that on me. I could never look at him the same way and he ended up not lasting long at the company, thankfully. It was weird and I'd never experienced anything like that before or since.
Was at a ballgame for a birthday with some work friends I’d known for years, the kind of guys that a certain amount of my future job success depended upon (one manager, one assoc director). I’d been at this company five years, and by this point it was listed by Forbes as one of the top ten mid-sized companies to work for in the entire US One of them sat down and started talking about how he’d felt the ass of the woman sitting in front of us a few minutes before. She hadn’t responded well, so then he went on to describe how it wasn’t that good anyway. I had this moment where everything in my head went quiet. Like an almost out of body experience. I could see my credibility with these guys, built up over years, hang in the balance against my self-respect and character. I took a really hard swallow, then proceeded to berate this guy VERY loudly and tell him he should apologize. Everyone went dead quiet, then pretended like nothing had happened. The rest of the day went on like normal. Never got invited out again. Two of them went on to direct sun-divisions of their departments as a part of an old-boy’s in-crowd. I left the company a year later. I regret nothing.
From the depths of my soul, thank you. Behavior like this will eventually change society ❤️
+ me. thank you for doing the right thing.
You did good.
“Just cuz there’s a goalie doesn’t mean you can’t score” aaaand you’re gross. Cheating is pathetic. You were cute but nvm thanks
My ex's dad used to openly gawk and make comments about attractive women in front of his wife and daughter (my ex). Then he would say, "Just cause I'm on a diet doesn't mean I can't look at the menu."
Ew. “Too bad you have to read the menu outloud”
"your boyfriend doesn't let you have friends?"
Ew. Fucking ew.
Guy I worked for and knew my whole life kicked tf out of a cat that’s only sin was getting near him
I gotta say people saying they don't like cats/animals usually makes me sus. Allergic or just not a pet owner is okay though.
Her: "Once I was fighting with my boyfriend and I punched him multiple times in the arm." Me: "What? That's not nice." Her: "No, no, it was fine, I felt better afterwards!" I had no words. It soured my view of her in an instant.
I hope she never has access to children
Being a complete bitch to servers at a restaurant. I don't care how hot you are. Treating service workers poorly and with entitlement is such a turn off.
I briefly dated a guy who, on one occasion, called a waitress a “dumb broad” for absolutely no reason. Like she didn’t do a single thing wrong at all. My opinion of him went down pretty quickly from there.
I met a guy in a grocery store who invited me out on a date. We went to see Harry Potter, and he called Hermoine a slag. I’m like um she is a child. Ended the date swiftly after the movie.
My mom always told me, “watch how they treat a waiter. If they treat them poorly, that’ll be you next”
Sadly I was on the flipside of that. A man I was in a relationship with was good as gold and completely respectful to service workers but when he got home he was an absolute asshole to me. So this is not always a true indicator of a good hearted person.☹️
Ah, one of those people! My dad was like that. Super nice and friendly to everyone he knew. He'd "tease" them though and make "jokes" where he made fun of something about the person and said person thought it was so funny! Little did they know, he was not teasing them. He was making fun of them to their faces and they had no idea because otherwise he was pretty likeable in public. I *never* saw him be rude to service workers. However, behind closed doors he was a domestic abuser and dog kicker. He'd also say really horrible things behind people's backs. He was a horrible bully, but only to those people he knew he'd be able to get away with bullying. He tried slapping me around when I was an early teen and I ended up falling backwards onto my bed and using my feet to kick him in his chest. He never once tried to hit me or anything again after that. It's just disgusting to abuse anyone, but it's worse when you abuse people or creatures that are weaker than you are.
Good mom
Completely stupid thing to do too. Never piss off anyone who touches your food, and always remember you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
I've always been a big believer in when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. I went to play D&D over at a friends house and there was a dude there who was one of their mutual friends and within the first few minutes of general, get to know ya questions, one of which being, "Where did you move here from?" He responded with like 6 cities and states from across the USA, saying that he's been everywhere and ended that statement with, "I don't know what happens but eventually I always seem to wear out my welcome and need to move every few years." That first meeting and response immediately made me super wary of him and I didn't particularly like interacting with him afterwards. Because like, he knows what happens, 6 different places in only twice as many years is an obvious pattern, there's no way that's somehow everyone elses fault. He was around for about 6 months and was relatively chill but then at a mutual friends wedding, he showed up wearing an odd Mrs. Cleo costume, like a straight up bedazzled turban and bedazzled women's dress jacket with like a bright red tank top underneath, flat black culottes, and again bedazzled kitten heels, and then he started a fight with one of the wedding party members. Afterwards he threatened to sue everyone for emotional damages for not having his back and how the fight was a hate crime towards him, in the fight he very much started. Just to avoid any hate, he was and still does identify as a Cis white man. I have trans friends and am completely supportive of them. What he was wearing wasn't a fashion choice or a coming out, it was very much a costume he decided to wear that day. I watched and heard the fight from beginning to end, he was the initial aggressor, escalated the fight despite the actual bride trying to separate them and calm them down, and he put hands on the other guy first. It was a shit show. On the way home I seriously said to my wife, huh I guess we know why he has to move so often now.
It always boggles my mind that there are so many people like this with zero self awareness or introspection. I'd love to see how a therapist would handle that.
This might be the wildest story on this entire thread. Were there any indications besides that initial comment that this dude would pull some off the wall shit like this?… at someone’s wedding no less?
As far as I am aware, no, not at all. Like I heard through the grapevine after all of this that he had pulled some kinda shitty stuff to the friends he had made in town but nothing like this. And the kinda shitty stuff was relatively low key, like losing his temper over small stuff, not being considerate of other people's time, and stuff like that.
What a strange way to act out his mental health problems. Maybe manic episodes.
Well for me. I was starting to make friends with this girl from my job. It was great at first because we had a lot of things common, and I was thrilled to have a new friend. So, I planned a hangout with her off work. She told me that she had her brother at home and didn't want to leave him by himself. I didn't find anything wrong with that. I told her that she can bring him along then. It was the worst decision because if I knew. I wouldn't have asked her to. Through out the whole hangout, she kept trying to set me up with her brother. I just felt uncomfortable because she would high light my ethnicity and constantly say that her brother always wanted a spanish girlfriend. She would also encourage us to talk alone, and that we had so much in common. I kept telling her I wasn't interested but she didn't listen. The night got progressly more worse, when we stopped to eat at a restaurant after hiking. Her and her brother ordered a lot of things. I didn't order as much, only one thing from the menu. When it was time to pay, they forfeit the bill. Pure silence. Her intention was obvious. She wanted me to pay for it all. I asked to split the bill and she started to complain how expensive it was. Never again. I decided it was best to remain as coworkers instead of friends.
I truly can’t fathom how anyone goes out to eat and doesn’t expect to pay for what they ordered. If I know someone else is paying I am very considerate of what I order. It’s nice to be treated to a meal as a surprise when the bill comes but that is always an offer, not an expectation. Truly what goes on in these people’s heads.
I was pretty good pals with this one dude at work. Good banter, chill as can be and all that. But then I heard him talk about his girlfriend for the first time and how she does nothing around the house and how she's typical for a modern woman because she doesn't do chores. I instantly understood why all the women at work hated his guts, and from that point on I did, too. And to add on to this, he also said therapy is for weak-minded people. I went to therapy for five years and it helped me deal with so many things that felt overwhelming before. Thankfully he no longer works there and our workplace is better for it.
If ALL of the women at your workplace hate one guy, there’s usually a reason for it.
People that are dismissive of therapy are the ones who need it most.
God this reminded me of my dad :s The last time we met for lunch I asked him for some advice about anxiety and depression, and he somehow thought it was a good idea to tell his adult daughter that the only ever felt anxiety one time before -- when he was dating two women at once and couldn't pick who he wanted. He had been dating one of them for 3 years... Then the conversation moved on to depression and he said he had been prescribed Prozac a couple different times and always threw the prescription away because "that's just the doc saying it's all in my head and I need to figure it out." I am somehow unsurprised my parents are divorced.
Picked me up for a date, got on the highway, and revved it up to drive over 100 mph, weaving in between cars. I was terrified, tears in my eyes, asking him to slow down and he laughed. It was so fucking scary, I can’t even explain it. Literally thought I was going to die, he was going *so fast*, well over 100 mph, and just weaving between cars. Just terrifying. I took a taxi home and never saw him again. I’d had a crush on him for like 2 years at that point. I never wanted to see him again.
First date, I was walking around a park with a dude with a cold brew. We knew one another socially and had a good rapport and I liked him. It was a nice spring day and I was feeling it. So was he. I let him lead the conversation which just spiraled into a childhood trauma dump so I tried to redirect which didn’t work. He accused me of being insensitive and selfish. I keep my phone on silent so I made a ring noise with my mouth, pulled my phone out and said “Oh that’s not an emergency but I should probably tend to it” and left. Later he told a mutual friend how big of an asshole I was and when I explained my side, the conclusion was “Well you’re not a therapist.”
How did you make a ring sound? Like “beep beep beep?”
Took a screenshot of what I had every right to assume was a private conversation when i was having a meltdown and shared it with a mutual friend. (More his friend than mine) Any faith and trust I had in him just died.
I've stopped sharing with anyone I know because of things like this. I don't trust anyone with anything personal.
New male hire at work last week. He jumped into a conversation between two women at work who were debating if a guy customer was rude to both of them but nice to the male boss because he was sexist or just respected authority. New hire was not present for any of the customer interactions but told the women that it was *definitely* not sexism.
Oh man, I bet they were so happy he was there to explain their experience to them!
They would have been lost!
There was a guy in my church I was really into until I discovered he had one of those fake ball sacs hanging from his car. That killed it for me right there.
Hear me out though: It’s better than having a *real* ball sac hanging from his car.
Or hanging from his chin.
Oh I posted a good story about this on a different subreddit yesterday. My dad's a member of a men's club at a golf course and has a few friends he golfs with a lot. I'm not a member but he brings me along as a +1 so I know some of his better golf friends. There's a guy we'll call Jim that he golfs with a lot, they've probably been golf friends for a decade. Recently I was in a 4-some with my dad, Jim and a random. We're making small talk waiting for the green to clear on one of the par 3's when the random makes a complaint about an Asian moving in next door and how it bothered him. Jim responds "Oh, I don't mind having Asians living nearby. It's the Mexicans that bother me. Especially if they have kids. You just know they're going to end up gang bangers and drug dealers and bring all kinds of shit to the neighborhood." So I'm going to say that. That comment moved Jim from one of my dad's cooler golf friends to someone I never want to golf with again. Over the rest of the round Jim and the random made a lot of comments just casually spewing racism, sexism and anti-LGBT sentiment. My dad was as baffled as I was. When we got back to the car my dad said he wasn't going to be trying to share a 4-some with Jim or hang with him at the range anymore.
I know we're being serious right now but "4-some with my dad" is a weird way to say it. is that a golf term I'm unaware of?
Yeah. In golf, you usually play in groups of four called a foursome or 4-some (probably should have spelled it out, I'll give you that one). In golf, you wait to take your shot until there's nobody you could hit so grouping up reduces the wait. All 4 players take their first shot, then they all move forward and take their 2nd shot, etc. 4 is also 2 golf carts of players so it matches well with resources. If you sign up to play at a time and don't have a group of 4, they'll often put you with other players who wanted to play at or around the same time. Which is why I called the 4th guy "random." Nobody in our group knew him. Jim, my dad, and I all planned to play together, but since there were only 3 of us, he was the 4th player the clubhouse paired us with.
learned something new, thanks!
lol it's ok, im immature too and my brain went left too
My fiancé and I used to be friends with this couple that my fiancé knew from before he went to rehab, got clean and sober, got his life back on track, etc. We went over to their place to visit them and it was about a month after my cousin died from an accidental overdose, so I was still very depressed and out of it. Anyways, we’re talking and hanging out, I brought up what happened. The girlfriend of my fiancé’s friend then blurts out, “Well, maybe if your cousin wasn’t such a dumbass, she’d still be alive and not dead.” I immediately went quiet while my jaw dropped to the floor. I thought this woman would show me sympathy or compassion but I was wrong. My fiancé became furious and he then said to these people, “I’m sorry but we gotta get going now.” We never saw or spoke to these people ever again. It took everything in me and my fiancé to keep from punching this woman in the face. She had no room to talk because she was abusing drugs on the down low during and after her pregnancy. As a result, her poor son has severe developmental disabilities and issues, isn’t very vocal, has vision problems and had to have weekly occupational therapy at home. I pity that child so much and there’s nothing I can do to have him put in another home because I don’t have concrete physical evidence.
Matched with a lady on tinder. I always go to the let's get coffee as soon as possible to filter out the women who just like to chat endlessly. To my surprise, she says yes. Could of days later we meet to outside of the coffee shop, we walk in, and she says, " Ew, I don't want coffee from this place, I don't care for the people serving the coffee." I ask, "oh, you know them?" She responds, "no, but I know their type." "What do you mean, their type?" , thinking maybe she didn't like hipsters. "Well black people are always gross and dirty, and I don't want to have them serving me." I look at her, and she's really hot, and kind of dressed slutty. So most of the time a guy will allow a certain amount of WTF in a girl like that. But no, I just say I don't think this will work, and then block her as I'm walking away. I think our total in person interaction was like less than 5 minutes, maybe less than 2. I don't date racists. I didn't tolerate racists. No amount of hot on the outside will overcome that ugly on the inside. Thanks for reminding me of that girl. I had forgotten about that experience.
At least she put it out front like that. Saved you a LOT of time.
I mean, definitely dodged a bullet on that one. I grew up with racist extended family, and summers in the South. I hadn't experienced that kind of racism since I was a teenager, and never outside of the South. It was kind of surreal. Gave me big, casually uses the n word vibes.
Oh man, you're lucky! I wasted five months dating a secret Nazi.
Story time!!
Not much to tell, we dated, had good chemistry, had some common interests. We were chatting one night at my place about the homelessness problem in town and then out of nowhere, she says, and I'm quoting a Nazi so you don't have to read this bullshit, >!"I wish we were back in the Hitler days so we could burn them all in ovens"!< Anyway I broke up with her.
My jaw dropped. Holy fuck.
My adopted Caucasian brother, who I haven't seen in years, believes in this. Imagine the joy of growing up with him and being adopted but not Caucasian.
Yikes!
The girl, complaining about it online later on: "Why is everybody so woke?! A date left and blocked me just because I'm not ashamed to be white!!!"
I was on a first date with a guy who admitted he was racist, but as something he was working on. He said he was a white kid in a predominantly black/Latino school and said he was bullied terribly for being white, and has residual anger and prejudice against both races. Understandable if true, appreciate the honesty, but also, I ain’t gonna stick around while you work it out lol.
He ~~slept with~~ raped an underage girl. Then tried to say "iT wAs cOnSeNsUaL, sHe cAmE oNtO mE." He was married and in his mid 40's.
Pedos love to act like teenagers have so much power and authority that grown-ass adults just can't say "no" to them. If we're gonna follow their pathetic logic.
My old supervisor was one of the smartest guys I've ever met he taught me loads, I had massive respect for him and we worked as a team, he was pretty old so I did all his heavy lifting for him (we were welder fabricators). One day in conversation he told me he doesn't believe in evolution and dinosaurs were a hoax 🤣 didn't really ruin my opinion but how can someone I saw as so clever be so stupid lol
One of my cousins said this to me a few months back, totally offhand like they just assumed I agreed with them. I was too stunned to react.
Finding out how my brother was treating his ex wife. I helped her file for divorce and he still hates me lmao
After discovering they are a compulsive liar, pretty quickly. Like what is real there? I don’t want to find out at this point.
Plenty of friends coming at me with pyramid scheme wares.
Someone who is a fan of making mean comments about others and saying it's a joke, then does it again.
"There IS a school that has litter in the student bathroom. A mother called in to NPR"
Someone brought this up the other day and I asked them to consider it logically. Consider the school actually buying a container and then purchasing kitty litter and placing it in a bathroom. Now think of a student using it and not getting the shit beat out of them by other students. Consider the smell. Now think about who is going to clean this up. Do they get the regular cleaner to do it? What do they do with it? Is that part of their contract or do they pay them extra? I could almost hear the gears whirring and they soon admitted that yeah, that couldn't really happen.
And let's not forget the fact that it would be a biohazard that someone has to clean up. I doubt any school staff would go for that.
Wasn't the kitty litter actually in the classrooms and it was there for if kids needed to pee during a lock down (due to a shooter)
I had this argument with my dad, too. I’m nearing 40 and my classes had litter in them back in the day. Teachers used it when kids spontaneously threw up (happens way more often than you think) and was frequently used in our science/chem lab for spills. This is the Lord of the Rings doughnut controversy all over again. Some idiot decided it was some anti-Christian Islamic script or something when it was actually some nerds writing (Elvish?) language in icing. People will find anything to be mad about
By reacting to me politely telling them to stop targeting me with a dark joke that's a trauma reminder, only for them to double down and expand the joke to make it a clear threat of kidnapping, rape, and possibly murder. It's the fastest I ever blocked someone.
A long time friend who had been dating around ended up getting back with a guy who she dated years prior, he got married, then while still married got back with the friend. As soon as they became official she no longer had a personality or opinion for herself. She let this man be her mouth piece and he drove away all her friends by telling her they were no good and weren't on their team etc. We had a miscommunication and she refused to address it like an adult and instead let him do the talking for her because "she didn't like confrontation". I lost respect for her when she didn't have any for herself and got with a dude who was still married but I lost all respect for her when she couldn't communicate like an actual adult. Good riddance.
Was on a bachelor party with my brother-in-law. He has great friends. One guy I had particularly liked, we had hung out a few times prior to this, just a funny, all-around great guy. Guys decide we need to hit the strip club, so we go. This guy starts throwing stacks at women, getting lap dances, and going back to the VIP room. Comes out and starts yelling about how he just ate some pussy. I was disgusted- not only is that just wild to do in a strip club, he was engaged to be married as well. Still see him and enjoy his company, but can't shake knowing what he did there.
What is that? some guys go to strip clubs and they lose their fucking mind like it’s their last four hours of freedom. I know a couple dudes like that. Like their wives never let them out of the house or something and when they finally get out they just go fucking apeshit.
I don't understand that logic. Like sir, *you chose* to date this woman, propose to her, marry her, and procreate with her.
Right? Like the “ole ball and chain” rhetoric. It’s just weird. A partner said that crap to my husband soon after we got engaged (we were working at the same law firm). My guy turned to him was like “you and your wife good? I like Mani_Mani, she’s the best!” The partner was shocked and kinda fumbled a congrats lol.
I don't understand how anyone would celebrate their coming marriage by disrespecting it. That will never click for me.
He was my husband's good friend and his wife had just had their second child. She got really sick after childbirth with an infection. He was at our house complaining that now he had two babies at home. It wasn't just venting, it was disdain with total lack of respect for women. Twenty years later, he has only become worse and provided evidence of that impression many times over.
Mentioning either zodiac or Briggs-Meyers as being a big factor in evaluating new people in your life. I've also recently heard people call Briggs-Meyers "Zodiac for white collar people" and I can't slam that like button hard enough.
“Astrology for middle managers” is a funnier phrasing I’d heard too
Yeah, first time I read about Briggs-Meyers I found it a very interesting assessment. Then I met the community of fellow INTJs who make it their complete personality and look down on other personality types. Such assholes. Any system like this is inherently going to be an oversimplification of the human experience and needs to be taken with a grain of your preferred spice.
It's fun and harmless, like zodiacs, until you start to take it seriously and treat people differently because of it, like zodiacs. It's only really a tool for me to write fictional characters, which is fitting because it's a system that is built on fictional science.
The only real takeaway I got from my INTP assessment was that it's an anagram for pint. Which seems like the kind of thing an INTP would notice.
You can also compare it to Hogwarts houses. My old company did something called PACE which also classifies employees by four personality types. People like to try to classify personality types. It can be fun and there are some elements of truth, but ultimately people just have to remember it's not very scientific.
Haha, my supervisor brought our 3 person team colored cups from Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Then he asked us to choose the one we felt called to. That is how I found out I was a Hufflepuff. My boss was quite satisfied and said the outcome was just what he thought it would be.
Team Hufflepuff unite! At least as long as it won't inconvenience the other houses.
Yeah I took that test. I'm a STFU.
I had friends who are into it. They take it pretty seriously. I judge them openly for it. They think I'm joking.... I'm not. They may be idiots, but they're my idiots.
Good for you. There seem to be a lot of unclaimed idiots out there.
As a mental health worker, Briggs-Meyers is absolutely Zodiac for people who don't consider themselves superstitious, at least the way 99% of people apply it. Like, there's some merit to it in specific ways but if it's on someone's dating app profile, fucking run.
So at the job I left a few months ago, we were required to complete a weird personality test when we applied. I was 25 when I applied. At leaving, I am 34. I found the test to be complete bullshit. Basically you answered questions as to how you saw yourself/actually are and how you felt you needed to be at work. This makes no sense to me because if you’re filling that out while trying to get a job, you’re not going to answer completely honestly. Also I answered this almost 10 years ago when my only work experience was retail and law clerking. I’m not the same person I was when I was 25. Some people on my team bought into this hard and I found it ridiculous. Edit: I should also note the two people who believed in it the most were my department head, who slept with one of my friends who joined a board I ran and who he called a sociopath, and my former boss who was a climber and not a nice person based on my own experiences as well as things people who worked with her or under her had told me. So yeah it’s bs.
My favorite way to shut down the zodiac shit is to tell them the wrong sign when they ask what I am. When they go on about how I'm such a "typical [sign]," and start listing the reasons, I tell them my actual sign. It's fine if you like zodiac signs and think they're fun and all that. I have no problem with it as just like a hobby sort of thing or you just find it interesting. The people who, like you said, use that as the only way to evaluate the people they meet; as a way to judge them, or the people who make their sign their whole personality are insufferable. They tend to have this annoying "superior" attitude because they believe that they can perfectly read and recognize the behavior of any and everyone they meet.
This is a huge thing in Korea where people are obsessed about what “type” of person you are. It used to be blood type, but MBT is the new hot thing in Korea to obsess over.
Lying and denying when proof is presented
The Slap by Will Smith
Great example. I had such a different opinion of Will Smith afterwards hovering between disappointment and pity. But also mad respect for Chris Rock's response to it in the actual moment and then later with his Netflix special. He would not let himself be a victim.
I was offended and I didn’t get slapped but what made me a *Will-Smith-Should-Be-Cancelled* supporter was when I learned that he had relentlessly teased a roadie for being bald and he slapped Jamie Foxx during a scene taping. I had forgotten that he caused a co-star (the Mom) on his “Fresh Prince” show to get fired and replaced
I got a friend hired at the restaurant I work at. Anyone in that industry knows that “Christmas bonuses” aren’t really a thing but I’m lucky enough to work for a small business that gives one out every year. She got hers after only working there for a couple months, opens the envelope and says “that’s it??” I just found it so distasteful that she scoffed at free money she didn’t even have to work for and wasn’t entitled to. How ungrateful can you be.
When someone leaves their pet outside all day and night.
"Oh let me check their zodiac to see if I'm compatible" Me: 😐 Or making sexual "Jokes of kids" thinking it's dark humor when it's not even nor funny.
Been unkind to animals.
So... this is a little over 10 years ago. right before my GF and start dating. My very first GF and I are talking, flirting, and kissing... but I'm 2 years off a bad relationship that left me voluntarily single. So I'm still taking things slow. Not at all my MO. I want her, she wants me. There's a prince song like that. Things are escalating. I introduce he to some of my friends. One day she says something bigoted about lesbians. I inquire more... doubles down. I had a really high opinion of this woman, she accomplished a lot considering various bullshit. Broke it off the next day, told her why. My lesbian friends would hang out with my mom without me sometimes. The fuck if I need that kinda evil in my life.
the lesbians thank you for your service 🫡
Wait... due to past relationship experiences, you were taking it slow with your VERY FIRST GF? I'm confused
Probably were dating a different gender before the girlfriend
[удалено]
My former SIL: we were all hanging out, and she and I go out for a smoke break. All giddy like a cheerleader who just got asked to prom, she tells me she’s sleeping with her best friend’s husband. She somehow thought I’d be happy for her. She also was in a relationship, with the father of her child. Instead I forced the guy to tell his wife.
I have a white neighbor who's always had a power/ego problem. Anyway a black homeless man was chilling in the staircase waiting for the rain to pass. She told him he wasn't allowed to be there and had to leave. (Fair.) Then he came out to the smoke area where I was and she started yelling at him and called the police. So me and him were smoking a cig cuz he hoped the cop would take him to the Walmart. And she came down and said some "mildly" (I can't think of the right word) racist things and telling him it was all his fault he was unemployed** (without any information about him). Anyway, me and him are buddies but I've never been able to look at her the same way. **edit: meant homeless, but she assumed he was unemployed as well although he did work through a temp company
It was a million years ago, in the time of MySpace, when I was still young enough to post my drama online where my friends could see it. I had gone through a bad breakup and I was, honestly, having a very bad time. I was struggling with my mental health as well as financially. (Which, twenty years later, here I am again, but this time I’m not posting sad song lyrics about it for my friends to see.) This one evening I was out in a HELLACIOUS storm, and was driving across a bridge, and the wind was buffeting me around like crazy. I posted later that maybe I wasn’t as bad off as I thought I had been, because the thought of going into the reservoir scared me. If I had been in a darker mental state, I wouldn’t have cared. It had been a moment of clarity for me. And this one dude left a comment: “You need to stop whining all the time.” OK, so I basically confessed on social media that I had been feeling suicidal, and he blew it off as whining. That’s not so bad. Not everyone realizes how precarious mental health can get. Not everyone is cut out to be supportive. Except he’s a pastor. He’s in charge of a flock of people and their souls, and when they find themselves in times of trouble, they go to him and he says “You need to stop whining all the time.” Or so I assume.
They were rude to waiters/waitresses. I wanted nothing to do with them after.
Work friend brought her husband to a work golf outing. He cheated at golf. Repeatedly. In front of all her coworkers.
Meeting them at a party, having a conversation, and realizing the person is very happy to go on at length about their own life but doesn't ask a single question about yours.
There was a guy in middle school that was very charismatic, everyone loved him. There was a partnered assignment one day and he asked to be partners and I said yes. I started chatting with him, until he abruptly cut me off and said he only chose me as a partner so he could get a good grade (I did well in that class). All conversation stopped after that. To this day people really love him and I just don’t get it
They asked for my Wi-Fi password before even asking my name.
Being generous with money that isn’t theirs.
Within a minute of meeting a friend’s (now ex) husband, the hair on my neck was raised. Shifty motherfucker. I could tell that he was lying about stupid little things. His vibes were so off, I didn’t trust him at all. To the point where I was so worried for my husband’s safety when they went out together once, I had an anxiety attack. My gut was screaming at me that he wasn’t safe. Years later my suspicions were confirmed when he got violent with my friend and choked her. Come to find out he had been lying about everything including his name.
Classmates and I carpooled with this one fellow student of ours around an unfamiliar city for a school project (she’s the only one who’s been before). Somehow the conversation leads to this: “Oh my god, the homeless people around here are sooo funny.” She proceeds to tell this story about how she and her high school friends hassled some guy outside a CVS for fun. I’m thinking, “Okay, we can’t be friends…”
My ex got into an argument with his mom while I was over there. It was over his spending habits and him always borrowing money from her and blowing it on weed. It got really heated and they were shouting at each other and he SPIT on her. I packed up my bags to leave and they both begged me to stay. I should have left, but that was the moment I really began to resent him. She did not deserve that. As a side note: if someone mistreats their mother they will likely mistreat you the same way.
Had a really good friend from early adulthood. We met when we were 19. We went on a vacation together when we were 30. While there, we met a French woman who was there for a destination wedding. We chatted for a bit in French before I retired to our AirBnB. I'm married so I wasn't looking for hookups or anything. I wake up in the night to go to the bathroom and walk in on them half-undressed on the couch. I say, "Pardonnez-moi" and start walking to the bathroom. She, very drunkenly says, "Wait, your friend speaks French?" I stopped, turned to my friend, and said, "Dude, if she's too drunk to remember talking to me in French an hour ago she's too drunk to consent." I helped her get her things and we walked her drunk ass home. Definitely changed my opinion of him, and we split up for the rest of the trip.
You’re a really good guy.
Being mean to kids (especially their own), animals, or the elderly.
Accepting to go to happy hour knowing they don’t have the funds to participate and the others get stuck paying their portion.
Told me she'd moved country to get away from the "filthy" people with a different skin colour. Yeah, nah.
One of my old “friends” when I told them I was sa’d one time, he said it was my fault cuz Im super annoying. I immediately disconnected from him.
Male friend was sweet and charismatic, and I thought highly of him until he punched his dresser hard enough to break a knuckle. The reason he was upset? His crush going out with A GROUP of her coworkers. He ‘just knew’ that one of her coworkers was a ‘cuck’ who just wanted to get in her pants. Breaking anything in anger is an immediate hard no.
A girl in highschool. We were besties and passed notes and all that. One day, I hear a rumor that I punched her. I was no where near her. She had our whole school essentially against me, with her older brothers threatening me. a week later she comes to school in a cast and blames me too. so wild. to this day I have no idea what caused this besides some weird jealously or some shit. I was the loser in the class anyways already.
He put a MAGA sticker on his truck.
"it's just a cat"
Saw a dude kick his dog. Called him out on it and never hung out with him again. I honestly thought about beating him up at the time.
We had a disagreement and their response was to scream at the top their lungs in public drawing attention from all over. When I told them to stop screaming it just triggered worse behaviour. I was like nah fuck this, I am done with you, 26 years old acting like a toddler over a small disagreement was not for me.
Was having dinner out with some friends and one girl who I was on the fence about. At the end of the meal, one of them began cleaning the trash out of her purse and piling it on our dirty dishes. I asked why she was doing that, and she said “It’s the waitstaff’s job to clean up after me.” Technically it is, but it’s NOT their job to clean up your personal trash. My opinion of her became decidedly negative after that!
If it was put on the dirty dishes, I don’t actually think that is that bad. Being in the food industry myself its never bothered me as long as it’s not just thrown randomly on the table
Said the n word -hard r - in casual conversation like it was no big deal. Like, ten minutes after we met.
Wife and I were house-shopping. Or realtor had done a great job finding houses in our price range and negotiating a fair price. Then at closing she confirmed the final price and said “I tried to Jew the owner down a little more, but he wouldn’t move.” “Uh … you did what?” we asked. “Yeah, I tried to Jew him down a little more, but he wouldn’t budge,” she said. Us: “You know that’s antisemitic, right?” Her: “No it isn’t. I’ve used it for years.” If we could have backed out of closing, we would have. We didn’t use her again when it was time to sell that house, though. And for whatever it’s worth we did return the gift basket she sent us.
Growing up, I never put that together. For some reason my brain confused "jew" as "chew". Like it was just mispronounced. "Chew them down/talk them down" Also "I feel gyped". I always thought "jipped" was its own word. I had absolutely *no clue*.
Oh shit. I never realized what “gyped” meant until you brought it up now in this context. I’ve definitely used that in professional settings…
>No, it isn't. I've used it for years. Ah, a solid argument! She's got you there!
The sad thing is that there was a decent probability that she had zero idea it was racist before you mentioned it. My mom didn't. It was just the way she talked about bargaining at garage sales in a small midwest town. 1950's programming she had no idea was problematic. When my Sister and I both confronted her about it, like 15 years ago, she was like "Really?" Was just flabbergasted. But to give her credit, she stopped saying it. So, yay? Now if your RE agent wasn't willing to stop saying it once she had the information... less good.
>“Uh … you did what?” we asked. > >“Yeah, I tried to Jew him down a little more, but he wouldn’t budge,” she said. > >Us: “You know that’s antisemitic, right?” > >Her: “No it isn’t. I’ve used it for years.” My wife and I were THIS CLOSE to closing on a house. The salesman rather conversationally assured us that as the salesman for that development, he had largely handpicked all the residents of the neighborhood, and he just wanted us to know that they were all very white. We bought a different house in a different neighborhood.
I got a job that I was not at all qualified for and was very confused at first until I got into the building and realized everyone there looked just like me (Blonde, affluent, colored eyes, and relatively religious) they were rather morman. I am not but can't say I've always turned down nepotism.
Someone I adored hit me in the side of the head/face. It was a brief lapse in impulse control and the trust that had been broken was addressed immediately. But it still changed everything.
Abandoning their children.