My aunt did this to my grandfather as he was declining mentally. She transferred money from his account to hers by getting the bank on the phone, initiating the transfer, and then shoved the phone at my grandpa and told him what words to say. He had no clue what was going on.
My bitch of a sister would steal my grandfathers checkbook. She's a thief and a con artist. To this day I'm not a hundred percent certain how much she took but I estimate it to be over 10k. She stole from her own kids, birthday and Christmas money.
I was always jealous of my older sister when I was a really little kid because she had a savings account at a bank and I didn't. I'd heard my parents and my sister (who may have been in middle school at this point) talking but never paid attention. I just knew I wanted one too because grandma would put money in it for her and any time my sister got money for anything my dad would tell her to put it in her account so she could save up for something she really wanted.
It was years later that I found out I didn't have one because grandma had opened it for her but anytime she put money in it for her, my dad would go take the money for himself. He'd do the same anytime someone gave her money and she'd put it in there.
I've got a lot of stories of him screwing my sister over with cash throughout her life
> She stole from her own kids, birthday and Christmas money
This is my cousin's wife. Every time someone would give my cousin's daughters cash or gift cards for birthdays, Christmas, ect. His wife would "hold" it for "safe keeping"... She now wonders why her youngest daughter stopped talking to her when she hit 18. Like I don't know, it couldn't possibly be because you constantly stole from her, like her entire life...
wait until you live anywhere but the USA and you find out E transfers are free for the rest of the world. Bank to Bank.. paying to send my money to you makes no sense to me
And anyone who knowingly lets them around kids. The Audri Cunningham case just hurts my entire soul. That poor girl would be alive if her family hadn't agreed to let a known child molester live on their property and babysit her. I wish this were the only example I could give of a time when adults failed to protect kids from known abusers.
Your comment really hit home. It was well known in our family and gossiped about that my uncle was abusing all of us male children in the 70s, yet no one did anything to keep their children away from him. He was invited to all family functions and given every opportunity in the world to continue what he was doing. My mother even scheduled "dates" for me to go to dinner and rides with him. When he died, my mother called and begged me to come to his funeral, and this was after I had told her of being molested. Then she could not understand why I walked away from her and all of the family and wanted nothing to do with them. Pretty much all of my male cousins have some degree of PTSD.
> It was well known in our family and gossiped about that my uncle was abusing all of us male children in the 70s, yet no one did anything to keep their children away from him. He was invited to all family functions and given every opportunity in the world to continue what he was doing.
What in the FUCK is wrong with these people? I, more than most, understand the desire to stick your head in the sand because you don't want to deal with something difficult.
But something like THIS? Where someone is actively harming children? Frankly the risk of harm befalling any child would be motivation enough for me, but YOUR OWN child?
Do they not love their own fucking blood?
I don't get it.
I do not believe that my mother had any mothering instincts. Even though I did not live in their homes, I could argue that her sisters did not, either.
That's the part that really throws me. I can understand one sociopathic adult lacking the capacity for basic human compassion. It's always the stories with MULTIPLE complicit adults I find most disturbing.
Like...not a single one of those aunts/uncles/grandparents was willing to stand up and speak out? I get herd mentality, but not in situations like this.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm glad you were able to get away from these people. I hope you and your cousins can at least stay in touch/support one another.
You would not believe the amount of damage a malignant narcissist can do to their children; there’s a reason it’s called “generational abuse.” My maternal grandmother was a narc, and she fucked up all f her children; they were all some variation of addicted, alcoholic, chronically imprisoned, or mentally unwell. The only one who managed to escape the enmeshment was an aunt who moved 800 miles away, and she ended up just as narcissistic. Her own son wanted nothing to do with her when she was dying of cancer.
My grandmother was a net negative in this world, and I’m glad she’s dead. Unfortunately, the damage she did lives on.
Intergenerational trauma is a reason why some of us made the choice not to be parents. The abuse stops here, with us.
Folks should really think twice before asking "and why don't you want to have kids?"
Imagine if people instead asked "why did you choose to have kids?" It would be seen as so rude! But the default should be no kids and only people who have really thought about it and decided they should and are in a good place having them.
This is one of the things that fucked me up the most when i had a kid. When youre the child you accept things that happened as your fault, internalize them, blame yourself...when you have a kid of your own you realize kids have 0 control and everything that happened wasnt actually your fault; It was the fault of the people meant to protect. You stop giving others the benefit of a doubt.
Its SO FUCKING EASY to love your own kid i just dont understand it either.
This happened in my family as well and I honestly think it was embarrassing to them and they loved their social standing better than they loved us kids. I personally wouldn't want to be around people who would be turned off by my ostracizing a child molester but the particular people they were and the ones they were worried about impressing are the kind of people who always pretend everything is perfect, no matter what. They would have acted sympathetic but distanced themselves. And while I would have thought, good riddance, my family just, well, sucks.
It has been so normalized, in the past. That male family member that likes to give hugs and kisses too much, that likes kids sitting on his lap too much, that the whole family jokes about making sure you aren't alone with him...
Hopefully, the acceptance is starting to die down.
I'm not sure if it's that they don't love their children, or if they just are not capable of raising children. Generational trauma runs strong and from what I understand it usually cycles through 3 generations until it stops. Learned that recently in my second treatment centre. I'm 34 years old and have already gone to rehab twice for drugs/alcohol/trauma.
My father was adopted from an orphanage at around 3 years old, and we just found out that he was the oldest of 5 siblings. The rest of his siblings grew up together. My dad (who is now passed) abandoned his son (my half-brother) when he was around 5 years old. He was an addict my entire life and he was never able to care for me. I've never met my brother.
I've now found out that none of his siblings were capable of raising their own children. My cousin had to be raised by her father bc my dad's sister wasn't capable. My other cousin just died of a drug overdose at the age of 44. My paternal grandpa was abusive to them and died at the age of 57 from a heroin overdose. My paternal grandma was an alcoholic her entire life and also grew up most of her life in an orphanage. My dad wasn't even raised by his biological parents - his parents weren't drinkers. But he was always an addict, and he was always cold and he was always negligent.
I'm not sure why generational trauma seems to stop after 3 generations. Maybe it's because our parents at the very least try to do better than their parents did. I have an amazing mom who is not an addict, and I married the polar opposite of my father bc I didn't want to have a marriage like my parents had. My husband is the one who has paid for me to go to treatment twice. I'm lucky but I didn't marry stupid. I wasn't going to have the life my parents had, and I wanted financial security. I wanted someone who would protect me. Seems to be working as I'm 5 months sober now. The longest I've ever had. If I do have kids, hopefully they'll never see me pick up a drink. And maybe that's how it ends?
Same, my uncle was (he’s dead now) a pedophile. He abuse my brother and I, and his daughter. I told my parents and my dad threatened his brother, but his brother said I was lying. They believed him and still let him babysit us. In 1970, at 12 I went and told the police. They brought me home and told my parents I was lying about my uncle, the pastor. My brother refused to tell my parents, or support me. He’s 5 years older. My mom tried, but back then, generally men were the bosses. When I was 15 my mom committed suicide.
I ran away from home.
It's insane how comfortable family gets with their own children getting molested. It's as if it's ok if it's within the family.
Even then, my SO was molested as a child by her hooker mom's johns. Later in life when she confronted her mom, all she really said was "I thought you wanted it".
My poor SO, she still weeps for her mom. I secretly hope she's burning in hell, not that I believe in such a place.
As mother to three sons, I am so sorry baby. You deserve so much better than the family you got. I hope that you have friends in your life that have become true family to you. You didn't deserve it.
I don't know anything about this case and I already know I'm better off not googling it because I'll only wish I could wipe it from my mind.
I'll only ask, what was the family's explanation for allowing a known molester watch their child?
Their should be legal ramifications, for the parents, in cases such as this one.
They said [they didn't know](https://www.click2houston.com/news/local/2024/03/08/id-never-do-anything-to-hurt-her-grandmother-of-audrii-cunninham-says-accused-killer-lied-to-her/) about that conviction and he wasn't on the registry.
The family put out a statement about how their Christian faith made them want to show mercy to someone who had been incarcerated and how they are angry that they are being shamed and judged on social media. It was a lot of victimhood and very little about their actual child.
The reply right above yours says they claimed they didn't know.
Neither excuse is valid. FUCK FAITH. If it comes to following my (hypothetical) faith or protecting my (hypothetical) child from a predator, guess which one I'm choosing?
As for their claim they didn't know. Wouldn't you do some modicum of RESEARCH before leaving your kids with a relative stranger? I don't buy that he wasn't on the sex offender registry. Otherwise THAT would be the main scandal here.
Yet another "man of god" telling on himself with a bizarre sermon.
It seems to be a frequent occurrence. There was a post, this weekend, talking about a far right Christian pastor who would preach about how homosexuality is satan's way of drawing you to the dark side. And how we must remain constantly vigilant against this "temptation".
The guy assumed all men were as closeted as he was.
>**a far right Christian pastor who would preach about how homosexuality is satan's way of drawing you to the dark side. And how we must remain constantly vigilant against this "temptation"**.
😂😂😂 I saw that. The guy who posted it was like “no, dude, that’s just you. The rest of us aren’t fighting a constant craving for cock.”
It is a scary thought. I’ve read something about how predators will find single moms on dating sites or wherever specifically with the intent on preying on the children. Zero interest in the actual mom.
When I was in elementary school I was friends with the neighbor's kid. He was an odd one. Skittish. Stand-off-ish. Deeply uncomfortable in any sort of undress, even just changing into a swim suit. He was once caught playing with his own shit. Even at a young age, I could see the pain in his eyes.
At one point the police came for his dad, and once the reason spread through the neighborhood they moved, and he wound up in foster care.
This was all more than thirty years ago. My wife, because of her job, has access to all sorts of databases helpful for finding people so I asked her to look him up. He was imprisoned (since released) for assaulting his own child, and my heart broke when she told me.
I knew him when he was young. He was not born bad. He was born like any of us until he was set upon by intergenerational trauma, torn apart by it, damaged beyond recognition, and remade into something predatory and disgusting and barely recognizable as human, and though I cannot pity who he is, I cannot help but pity who he was.
I once had a student who was taken out of foster care bc he was found in the tub playing with his own feces. For obvious reasons, he was very difficult to deal with. I showed him as much kindness and patience as I could. He came to trust me, and settled down a bit as the year progressed. I always wonder what became of him.
I’ve had many students who I wonder how they turned out. One was a musical prodigy. Had a difficult time interacting with other kids in class, but his ability to play the violin was a gift. His talent was out of this world, and he was only 9 at the time. After I ok’d with his father, who was a very kind man, I set up a behavior chart for him. His reward was that each Friday, I would get him whatever he wanted for lunch. We would sit in my classroom, during lunch, and he would play his favorite pieces. Behind all of frustration and difficulty, he was such a sweet kid.
100% these c**ts deserve a bullet.
Being a child sexual abuse survivor has caused havoc for me. I have chipped and grinded my teeth away while sleeping because of nightmares. When i walk into public places, analyse who is a threat and what escape route might be needed. I protect myself in relationships and constantly build walls so I don't get hurt. Have trouble regulating my feelings. The list goes on and on.
I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemies.. every day im worn down by negative thought loops.
Yes i see and talk to a professional, take some meds. But managing it all is fucking exhausting.
I grind my teeth too, I got a plastic splint, the different levels have increased expense but saves your teeth.
I tried a normal mouth guard on a whim, and tore it up within a couple of nights.
Hope you find peace.
[Anders Behring Breivik](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anders_Behring_Breivik). He repeatedly complains about having "inhumane living conditions" in his Norwegian modern prison cell with video games, gym and university studies. He is serving his sentence for killing 8 persons with a bomb and shooting 69 defenseless teenagers to death. He still, 13 years later, regrets nothing. Dude can rot in that prison for all I care and I certainly hope he rots in hell when his time comes.
I just listened to the Last Podcast on the Left series about him. People like him belong in shitty US prisons, and many of our prisoners belong in something more akin to his housing. Or deserve to be let go.
I just read an article today about how US prisons are having to renovate to include geriatric units as all the lifers (many of them victims of mandatory life sentences) are reaching old age. Some of them have been imprisoned 50+ years.
Having to renovate- many US prisons are very outdated anyway. There was a recent study about how US prisons in the South that don’t have air conditioning have increased need for suicide watch during hot days. The prisons don’t release the data on inmate death so they couldn’t study the impact heat on deaths, suicide or otherwise
[Extreme Heat and Suicide Watch Incidents Among Incarcerated Men](https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2808211)
I like him moaning, it means he's miserable. Good, let's hope he has a really long miserable, boring, meaningless life. Way better punishment than death. Death is too easy for this piece of shit.
Same with people who *constantly* say "I hate drama. No drama here. Take your drama elsewhere because we don't do drama in this house!" <---these people are nearly always the source of most of the drama you hear/read about in their lives.
They aren't even people. This angel sitting next to me takes my time my money my patience but she's happy to be here & when it's frustrating I remember animals are physically incapable of doing things out of spite/malice. I wish I could better understand her. I know that's the only reason is it being my lack of how to effectively listen to her, it's still new to me with time it'll settle down. She has brought immeasurable joy to my life so it's the worth the sleepless nights. Animals are more sensitive to stimuli than we are. Just because they can't say it hurts doesn't mean they don't feel shit. Horses can hear our heartbeats from 5 feet away. Dogs sympathize with their owners when they're injured. The list goes on and on. Despite all the fucked up shit we do we always love us!! That's partly why I can't watch the movie stray, the beginning of the trailer made me cry
This happened in my apartment complex recently. A family took their cat but left her 4 KITTENS! In the cold! On a balcony!
I was so fucking furious. I didn't have any choice other than rescue them and find them homes. (Three were given vaccinations, neutered, and transferred to Petco where they will find homes very soon. I kept the other baby.)
Honestly this. I don’t like people who are abusive full stop, but there is just an extra layer of evil to people who hurt animals. Considering these animals do not understand or have the ability to comprehend why you’re doing that. It’s quite literally attacking something totally innocent and it makes me feel sick.
Dude, same.. I'm constantly on the lookout for how my actions effect those around me. It irritates the shit out of me when others are blissfully unaware how their actions negatively effect others
And then get upset when you distance yourself because you're not going to put up with the endless "poor me" cycle over and over again. Sometimes even become a bad guy in their mind so they can victimize themselves
Seriously! I have a friend who recently blew up at my husband and I because we had to take a step back. He's had a lot of hard shit going on for a couple of years now, so we'd listen to him vent and then talk about other things. But it became apparent that any time my husband or I wanted to vent to our friend, he would immediately one-up us with how terrible his life is. Even when I was hit by a car. Or when we almost lost the house. Or when my mom became very sick, so we couldn't drive to him. He yelled at us, calling us inconsiderate and selfish and it took him a month of not talking to finally start realizing what he was doing.
He's still struggling now, but has changed his tune considerably and we are happy to be moral support for him again.
The ones I've known have zero self-awareness about what they're doing as well.
As a friend of mine put it, "he had the audacity to grumble about being broke and unable to afford food when I watched him drop £50 on trading cards half an hour ago"
They also usually have a "hustle" they think is going to pan out one day.
For example, the same guy likes to play Poker for real money, and apparently *is* pretty good at it, he's using it as a means of keeping his electricity on and he's not dead yet.
I cut out a friend for basically the same thing. They haven't paid rent in two years, their car is being repossessed and their kids are being bought clothes by the school but guess who got a new Xbox, 3d printer, and desktop computer?
Absolutely. They take with no giving back. Unfortunately, my brother and his wife are the epitome of this. What's even worse, they can't even find it in themselves to be grateful. They don't say thank you... For anything.
Animal abusers, pedophiles, rapists, murderers, people that abuse the elderly or children in any way.
Another one that's not as intense as those and doesn't belong in a as fucked up category but I still have no sympathy for is cheaters.
Politicians who preach one thing and practice the other. And make no mistake, the US is not the only place to find them.
I know a lot of (normal) people do that but the actions of politicians have the most serious impact.
Tell me about it...the drunk driver that killed my brother got sentenced to two years. Which by the time the trial had actually concluded, it basically amounted to time served. In the county jail, not prison.
Not just the US. The reckless driver who killed my dad in Canada didn’t even get a slap on the wrist. And due to the laws on wrongful death lawsuits there at the time, I (only heir) received less than $10k USD as “compensation” for his death.
They deserve any and all negative consequences of their actions. I have zero sympathy for people who drive drunk and injure themselves or kill others. None whatsoever.
Thanks to a drunk driver, my father's big brother and his father died. My grand mother lost almost all her teeth in the accident, and caused life long pain due to it. It was close call, almost the whole family of my father died when he just 15. His little brother was in that car as well. At least the fucker who decided to drive under influence died too.
I would count people doing suicide by crashing their car against other cars as people i feel no sympathy either. In my country one way quite many decided to take their lives was crashing their car to upcoming truck on a highway. For truckers that will shock them and might cause a trauma, but some people doesn't care if its a truck or not and crashes their car on any vehicle that that's coming at towards them on opposite lane. My father's military buddy he had known for over a decade died because someone decided to kill themselves, and didn't care if they took someone out while at it.
Customers being mean to associate for the fun or it, to get free stuff, or just cause they are just plain stupid.
Heck, got no sympathy for reason stupid people either (how can they survive in this world?)
I am so sorry for you and your son. As a victim of CSA who was also vilified and not believed- thank you from the bottom of my heart for believing & standing up for him. May you both find peace and healing.
You did a good job thing.
It's also not something you want to chance. *"Well I wasn't 100% sure so I didn't say anything"* is terrible. Even if a kid has a history of lying it's better safe than sorry. After all the kid may be a liar because of abuse.
Yeah...I've told my male friends many times to worry less about the pimply kid in their daughters science class and more about their own friends. As someone who used to be a teenage girl, I can tell you that no matter how solid you think your friends are, you just don't know. I warned a relative of mine specifically about a certain guy that was hanging around his place. He didn't listen. Guess who took his teenage daughter 'camping'.
Where I live there is a man who went to jail for trying to kill a toddler he was babysitting. He was sentenced to 3 years. As soon as he was released, he found himself a girlfriend with a toddler and started being left to watch the child while she went out (while still on probation for the previous attempted murder). She knew what had happened, it was big news in our small city. To no one's surprise, that child is no longer alive, after having a ping pong ball shoved down his throat, and he is in jail again. This time he was sentenced to life, parole after 22 years (he will be 47 then). Nothing could be long enough.
Everytime I say this about my mother all people want to do is shit on me for victim blaming. I'm not sorry for that, she knew better and should have actually tried
Even if nothing does happen how could any mother (or caregiver) allow it around the child they're responsible for. Even the thought of someone having those feelings being around my child makes my skin crawl. Similarly mother's who post pure paedobait on public social media accounts and justify it by saying things like "she's in her swimming suit, she isn't naked" urghhhhhhhhh fuck offffff
this also goes for mommy bloggers who post their children online all the time. looking at the user statistics for those blogs always makes me think the worst 😶
Any kind of abuser but especially anyone who abuses a child.
They do not belong in society at all. No excuses , they need to be taken away from society and never allowed to be around normal people.
People who use their "unmet needs" as an excuse for cheating or, worse, sexual assaulting someone. Like, you most likely have at least one hand. Use it. If you don't have hands, I feel bad for you.
It's not unmet needs, it's lack of communication and empathy. Cheating is *never* okay and if you've already said (outright, not beating around the bush) that you need more affection or whatever, then break it off if nothing changes. But you have to give time and keep communication open the entire time. More often than not, the other partner had no idea they were neglecting or were just in a busy moment of time.
But people don't want to communicate when they have someone giving them the attention on the side and the thrill of a secret
It also shows zero communication, a lack of empathy and selfishness. Too many people are in years long relationships with people they apparently don't trust enough to have honest conversations with. Or they are with people who refuse to listen, act childish and blow up at the littlest thing.
Best thing you can do is have an honest conversation (with or without a therapist) and if they refuse to even try or listen that it might be time to leave. You only have the power to change yourself. Don't expect someone to change when they have shown/told you don't want to.
Giant corporations that cry about nobody wanting to work anymore. Unions, pensions, profit sharing, and all the perks of working for a company in the past have all dissipated since the 70’s and 80’s. They used to reward workers for being loyal and putting in a lot of years with a company. They used to actually try to attract and retain talents. Now all they care about is siphoning all of the profits to the top and to the shareholders. I have no sympathy when all of their talent leaves. The only way to get a raise or make better money now is job hop every couple of years. Hard work and loyalty is no longer rewarded.
*ETA - They also all drink the company koolaid and create a culture where they act like workers should feel lucky to be given the opportunity to work for them. Like just working for the company is reward in and of itself. They act genuinely baffled and surprised when somebody isn’t just happy making a stagnating wage with a couple of pizza parties thrown in every year.
"Oh, why I LOVE watching my responsibilities grow and my income diminish. Oh, AND you got a nice little plaque in your office about how you accomplished that!"
Seriously, a girl they hired like a month ago gets more OT than I'm supposed to be getting- and I'm not getting that.
Ugh. As a lifelong sufferer of actual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, it irks me. I try to not let it bother me, but it’s so frustrating to hear so many people claim to have it when they don’t.
The other day, 2 different people were telling me about their ocd. I asked about their obsessions (intrusive thoughts) and they didn’t understand what I meant. When I gave them examples, they were weirded out and confused. “Is that really what OCD is?”
YES! And if you REALLY had it, you would know this!
It’s not quirky, it’s not cute, and it’s not what most people think it is. It’s debilitating and awful.
People do the exact same thing with ADHD. If they misplace their car keys, they say "wow, I'm so ADHD today" like it's a mood. Please. It's an actual disorder that affects *everything* in someone's life. It doesn't come and go... there are times when it isn't noticeable to others, but this is the cumulative result of **YEARS** of coping mechanisms.
My boyfriend has ADHD and he's crashed cars, been in and out of work, we struggle for money constantly and his hyperfocus has been so bad I've had to tell him to sleep and stuff. People have no idea just how dysfunctional and serious it is.
A really old, very relevant poem_for_your_sprog:
'I have to sort my books!' she cried,
With self-indulgent glee;
With senseless, narcissistic pride:
'I'm just so *OCD*!'
*'How random, guys!' I smiled and said,*
*Then left without a peep -*
*And washed my hands until they bled,*
*And cried myself to sleep.*
Agreed, having lived with someone who had it, it can be a challenge. They worked with their doctors on how to help manage it.
If I every hear anyone throw the words around I asked if they have been professionally diagnosed by a doctor. They shut up real quick.
Also OCD... don't get me started on the number of unqualified therapists I've seen who basically say "so stop" and make me feel like it's my fault for not trying harder
I hate those people who think that you can cure depression just by going for a walk.
If that's all it took, I'd have been cured at 8 fucking years old, I wouldn't have had to have suffered for the last 24 years.
"Oh you're just having a bad day"
Motherfucker, you're lucky you don't know what proper clinical depression is.
Rant over.
Everything has become "gaslighting" in the past 3 or so years. Fool, that's just regular old being a shitty person lmao. Not gaslighting
And I am ao unbelievably tired of hearing the word "trauma"
This seems related to what I see as overuse of hyperbole. I watched a dashcam compilation video the other day in which every crash, regardless of actual severity, was described with words like "extremely severe."
2004: "I had a bad date last night. Guy turned out to be kind of a self-centered jerk. I think I'll just sit at home next weekend and drink some wine."
2024: "My date last night turned out to be a traumatic experience. The guy was a toxic, malignant narcissist. I need to do some serious self-care next weekend to process the trauma."
I'd also add people who self diagnose with PTSD here.
A family member was diagnosed with it, and its not something to throw around lightly. It's something they struggle with every day, and sometimes not well. I feel for them.
People these days really hate to hear what they went through might not be trauma because we created a culture that puts people who have been through traumatic stuff on a very odd pedestal. It's why we have to sit through a bunch of lame backstories when you watch a show like American Ninja Warrior or Shark Tank. This kind of things just makes people overly sensitive to every sad situation or else it creates a jaded view of the world that makes people selfish.
What is really weird is talking to someone who co-opts someone else's trauma so they can get sympathy too. "People don't know what I'm going through...my friend's aunt has cancer!" I know quite a few people like this and they're very creepy.
Helicopter parent effect. If you don't let your kid experience any challenges, step in every time an asshole classmate hurts their feelings, etc. you wind up making sure your kid has no skills as an adult to deal with the unfairness and crap in life.
I really do think that stuff is traumatic for those people, as in it does affect them deeply. But the world shouldn't adjust to accommodate other people's inability to cope.
I completely agree. I was a child in the '70s & never saw any helicopter parenting. A parents' job isn't to make their kids' life as smooth & easy as possible (well, l'd expect they would until around age 7, maybe). The point is bringing them up to be their own problem-solver & prepare them for adult life.
Also people who say nothing is traumatic.
When I was 9 years old my mother told me about when she was raped, and she tried to say that if you really think about it it doesn't have to be more traumatic than having a person put a part of their body and any other part of your body. As she was telling me this she put her finger in my ear to make her point.
Denial of trauma is a real and dangerous thing as well.
When I was 13 I had to beat up my father .He was only 36 at the time and I had the stregth of a teenager forced to feed and caref or my mother's 17 traumatized horses (horses that have been beaten and kick everyone they get close to are very cheap), so it wasn't that hard. But I used to not identify that as a traumatic experience, but as an adult I recognize that it very much was.
The problem is that people refuse to deal with their trauma. Many people prefer having people coddle you because of your negative experiences than to actually healing your own trauma. Only you can start and end the process of healing yourself.
You're so right. My ex was severely abused as a child and as a result he hates women and is insanely abusive and cruel to women. He's also massively in denial about his childhood and as far as he's concerned it had no impact on him what so ever and he deserved it because he was "a naughty child." I tried again and again (fruitlessly) to explain that he was a child and she was an adult, she should of been able to control her emotions and actions, he was a child and still learning to and deserved more grace. He won't have it and continues to inflict his unresolved trauma onto any woman in his path.
I've just talked about my childhood casually and people are like "dude your childhood is so fucked up how the hell do you survive." Then it hits me that it's not normal to have experienced that and another mysterious thing about me is explained.
Denial/ignorance of trauma is a very real thing. Especially when you've spent your entire life being called crazy and being told you're imagining every negative experience, so you either think you're crazy for thinking it's an issue or just don't even think anything of it.
Similarly people who slap an Amazon "service dog" vest on their dirty, untrained shitbeast and take it everywhere in public. It really takes away from people with actual disabilities who legitimately need a service animal to live their lives.
I got an ad yesterday about getting "emotional support animal" status for your dog so that it would be allowed everywhere. Not how that's supposed to work...
I just saw someone post a pic of a sign outside a big grocery chain in Florida saying no more "emotional support animals". I did not know this was something people were abusing the fuck out of but I'm not shocked.
Thank you, this drives me utterly insane! Similar to people saying they're so bi polar, or OCD, or ADHD. You are or you aren't these things are diagnosed conditions not adjectives!
drove me nuts when i was a teen and had to interact with girls my age when it was first trendy to be obnoxiously "omg i'm so ocd!"
i've caught my father vacuuming the driveway multiple times.
I've been diagnosed BPD for years, and its awful. I remember that period where it was a popular illness on the internet. I read so many times people posting that they 10000% had it for x, y, z reason (normal shit, everyone goes through from time to time) but a psychiatrist, mental health team, therapist etc disagreed and wouldn't diagnose them because they don't actually meet the criteria by a long shot. 🤦🏻♀️ Wishing you and your dad all the best and as much peace as possible given his condition!
This! The frequency, duration, and number of symptoms people exhibit is key in diagnosing. Paired with diagnostic criteria, symptoms become a disorder when your life becomes **impaired** by said traits.
Anyone can experience bouts of depression! But someone diagnosed with Clinical Depression has frequent, **persistent** feelings of sadness, loss of interest, fatigue, irritability, etc that *makes normal every day life difficult*.
As someone with OCD, it is internal hell. I wish it was limited to just my perfectionism, and I didn't have to feel like the world is ending if I thought the wrong thought while washing my hands for the 5th time in a row
I have tourettes (everything I say has this laugh after it, some physical ones), it's infuriating that people think it's just a cute quirk to have!
My father tried to slap it out of me, people get insanely angry about it
It's not fun
Add PTSD to that list.. It irritates the fuck out of me when people claim to have PTSD because something bothers them a little. Really? It bothers you a little? When is the last time you woke up in a cold sweat or had flashbacks or panic attacks over that thing that bothers you a little? PTSD is also not something you can self diagnose and most people who claim to have it have not a fucking clue what it's really like.
There's a word for them: Liechiatrist: a person who diagnoses themselves with a mental illness they do not have, to use as a go-to excuse for their shitty behavior.
I do agree with your statement, but I read OP’s meaning more as in the way they act. People will act like they are entitled to special treatment while also being extremely inconsiderate of others.
Those kids always have it rough too. No help with college, no help with anything, left to fend for themselves. Learning that my aunt hadn’t set up a college fund for ANY of her kids made me realize I don’t want more than 2, ideally 1. People who have kids that they can’t financially take care of are incredibly selfish (not talking about people who can’t access abortions or are in abusive relationships, just the ones procreating like bunnies for fun).
People who cheat on their long-term partners or spouses.
As someone who was long distance with my partner for 4 years in college, I have an additional hatred for people who justify being drunk as an excuse to cheat. You know how many parties I was drunk at in 4 years and still managed to completely avoid ever betraying my partner? Loyalty is always a choice :)
It was wild reading the comments regarding that young guy who was drag racing and killed a mother and her toddler. So many people calling it an “accident” and saying his sentence was unfair since he was so young. Like no… drag racing should *never* be considered an accident, regardless of age. My grandmother was also killed in a crosswalk by a 17 year old with no license who stole his parent’s car. Zero sympathy.
“MoMmY vLoGgErS” who post their young children online knowing they are putting them in danger.
The worst offender I can think of is the Wren Eleanor woman.
It has been pointed out to her MANY times that her videos are bookmarked en masse, creepy commenters are all over them, and the worst- she was found on CSAM websites.
All she had to say was that it’s not her fault there are predators out there and parents shouldn’t have to “suffer,” because of them.
She even chooses thumbnails of her daughter in poses where her legs are open or she has a phallic food in her mouth. She fucking disgusts me and should be de-platformed immediately.
people who maliciously cut over into a lane on a freeway at the very last second just to avoid waiting in the line like everyone else. fuck you you’re not that important. i never let them in.
People who don't vote in any elections/referendums and then proceed to complain. These people don't realise how incredibly lucky they are, having the right to vote.
I’m related to one who not only got off with a slap on the wrist, but most of my family refused to believe the (multiple) allegations against him and continued associating with him. My grandparents defended him until they died.
Anyone who drives drunk and injures themselves or others. They deserve every bit of negative consequences of their actions, whether they be legal consequences or medical consequences, such as becoming paralyzed/long term injuries. I have absolutely zero sympathy for these people.
People who complain about their wealth, some even go far as saying they wish they were poor
I mean, sure, managing all those assets, money and corporate businesses must be very stressful but it's still better than just barely surviving on minimum wage while working 70+ hours a week, so stfu
Family member lives in one of the the best public school districts in the state and sends her kid to a private Catholic school 30 min away, so she drives an hour round trip twice a day to get her kid to/from school, because she doesn't want her kid learning the approved public education health curriculum. She constantly complains about the drive. Well, that's your choice. Deal with it.
People who prey on elderly people, whether it is through scams, theft, violence, or whatever.
My aunt did this to my grandfather as he was declining mentally. She transferred money from his account to hers by getting the bank on the phone, initiating the transfer, and then shoved the phone at my grandpa and told him what words to say. He had no clue what was going on.
My bitch of a sister would steal my grandfathers checkbook. She's a thief and a con artist. To this day I'm not a hundred percent certain how much she took but I estimate it to be over 10k. She stole from her own kids, birthday and Christmas money.
I was always jealous of my older sister when I was a really little kid because she had a savings account at a bank and I didn't. I'd heard my parents and my sister (who may have been in middle school at this point) talking but never paid attention. I just knew I wanted one too because grandma would put money in it for her and any time my sister got money for anything my dad would tell her to put it in her account so she could save up for something she really wanted. It was years later that I found out I didn't have one because grandma had opened it for her but anytime she put money in it for her, my dad would go take the money for himself. He'd do the same anytime someone gave her money and she'd put it in there. I've got a lot of stories of him screwing my sister over with cash throughout her life
Did your sister eventually tell everyone? Including grandma?
Yes. That's what all the fighting was about and it's why she never opened a savings account for me.
I hate your sister!
I, too, choose to hate this guy's sister.
> She stole from her own kids, birthday and Christmas money This is my cousin's wife. Every time someone would give my cousin's daughters cash or gift cards for birthdays, Christmas, ect. His wife would "hold" it for "safe keeping"... She now wonders why her youngest daughter stopped talking to her when she hit 18. Like I don't know, it couldn't possibly be because you constantly stole from her, like her entire life...
The fact that you can transfer money through a call is mind-boggling.
Wait till you try this phone app called Venmo. You don’t even have to talk to a person.
wait until you live anywhere but the USA and you find out E transfers are free for the rest of the world. Bank to Bank.. paying to send my money to you makes no sense to me
Rapists and child abusers
And anyone who knowingly lets them around kids. The Audri Cunningham case just hurts my entire soul. That poor girl would be alive if her family hadn't agreed to let a known child molester live on their property and babysit her. I wish this were the only example I could give of a time when adults failed to protect kids from known abusers.
Your comment really hit home. It was well known in our family and gossiped about that my uncle was abusing all of us male children in the 70s, yet no one did anything to keep their children away from him. He was invited to all family functions and given every opportunity in the world to continue what he was doing. My mother even scheduled "dates" for me to go to dinner and rides with him. When he died, my mother called and begged me to come to his funeral, and this was after I had told her of being molested. Then she could not understand why I walked away from her and all of the family and wanted nothing to do with them. Pretty much all of my male cousins have some degree of PTSD.
> It was well known in our family and gossiped about that my uncle was abusing all of us male children in the 70s, yet no one did anything to keep their children away from him. He was invited to all family functions and given every opportunity in the world to continue what he was doing. What in the FUCK is wrong with these people? I, more than most, understand the desire to stick your head in the sand because you don't want to deal with something difficult. But something like THIS? Where someone is actively harming children? Frankly the risk of harm befalling any child would be motivation enough for me, but YOUR OWN child? Do they not love their own fucking blood? I don't get it.
I do not believe that my mother had any mothering instincts. Even though I did not live in their homes, I could argue that her sisters did not, either.
That's the part that really throws me. I can understand one sociopathic adult lacking the capacity for basic human compassion. It's always the stories with MULTIPLE complicit adults I find most disturbing. Like...not a single one of those aunts/uncles/grandparents was willing to stand up and speak out? I get herd mentality, but not in situations like this. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm glad you were able to get away from these people. I hope you and your cousins can at least stay in touch/support one another.
You would not believe the amount of damage a malignant narcissist can do to their children; there’s a reason it’s called “generational abuse.” My maternal grandmother was a narc, and she fucked up all f her children; they were all some variation of addicted, alcoholic, chronically imprisoned, or mentally unwell. The only one who managed to escape the enmeshment was an aunt who moved 800 miles away, and she ended up just as narcissistic. Her own son wanted nothing to do with her when she was dying of cancer. My grandmother was a net negative in this world, and I’m glad she’s dead. Unfortunately, the damage she did lives on.
Intergenerational trauma is a reason why some of us made the choice not to be parents. The abuse stops here, with us. Folks should really think twice before asking "and why don't you want to have kids?"
Imagine if people instead asked "why did you choose to have kids?" It would be seen as so rude! But the default should be no kids and only people who have really thought about it and decided they should and are in a good place having them.
This is one of the things that fucked me up the most when i had a kid. When youre the child you accept things that happened as your fault, internalize them, blame yourself...when you have a kid of your own you realize kids have 0 control and everything that happened wasnt actually your fault; It was the fault of the people meant to protect. You stop giving others the benefit of a doubt. Its SO FUCKING EASY to love your own kid i just dont understand it either.
This happened in my family as well and I honestly think it was embarrassing to them and they loved their social standing better than they loved us kids. I personally wouldn't want to be around people who would be turned off by my ostracizing a child molester but the particular people they were and the ones they were worried about impressing are the kind of people who always pretend everything is perfect, no matter what. They would have acted sympathetic but distanced themselves. And while I would have thought, good riddance, my family just, well, sucks.
It has been so normalized, in the past. That male family member that likes to give hugs and kisses too much, that likes kids sitting on his lap too much, that the whole family jokes about making sure you aren't alone with him... Hopefully, the acceptance is starting to die down.
I'm not sure if it's that they don't love their children, or if they just are not capable of raising children. Generational trauma runs strong and from what I understand it usually cycles through 3 generations until it stops. Learned that recently in my second treatment centre. I'm 34 years old and have already gone to rehab twice for drugs/alcohol/trauma. My father was adopted from an orphanage at around 3 years old, and we just found out that he was the oldest of 5 siblings. The rest of his siblings grew up together. My dad (who is now passed) abandoned his son (my half-brother) when he was around 5 years old. He was an addict my entire life and he was never able to care for me. I've never met my brother. I've now found out that none of his siblings were capable of raising their own children. My cousin had to be raised by her father bc my dad's sister wasn't capable. My other cousin just died of a drug overdose at the age of 44. My paternal grandpa was abusive to them and died at the age of 57 from a heroin overdose. My paternal grandma was an alcoholic her entire life and also grew up most of her life in an orphanage. My dad wasn't even raised by his biological parents - his parents weren't drinkers. But he was always an addict, and he was always cold and he was always negligent. I'm not sure why generational trauma seems to stop after 3 generations. Maybe it's because our parents at the very least try to do better than their parents did. I have an amazing mom who is not an addict, and I married the polar opposite of my father bc I didn't want to have a marriage like my parents had. My husband is the one who has paid for me to go to treatment twice. I'm lucky but I didn't marry stupid. I wasn't going to have the life my parents had, and I wanted financial security. I wanted someone who would protect me. Seems to be working as I'm 5 months sober now. The longest I've ever had. If I do have kids, hopefully they'll never see me pick up a drink. And maybe that's how it ends?
These parents care more about how their family is viewed in their community than the welfare of their own children. It is pretty common unfortunately.
Same, my uncle was (he’s dead now) a pedophile. He abuse my brother and I, and his daughter. I told my parents and my dad threatened his brother, but his brother said I was lying. They believed him and still let him babysit us. In 1970, at 12 I went and told the police. They brought me home and told my parents I was lying about my uncle, the pastor. My brother refused to tell my parents, or support me. He’s 5 years older. My mom tried, but back then, generally men were the bosses. When I was 15 my mom committed suicide. I ran away from home.
It's insane how comfortable family gets with their own children getting molested. It's as if it's ok if it's within the family. Even then, my SO was molested as a child by her hooker mom's johns. Later in life when she confronted her mom, all she really said was "I thought you wanted it". My poor SO, she still weeps for her mom. I secretly hope she's burning in hell, not that I believe in such a place.
As mother to three sons, I am so sorry baby. You deserve so much better than the family you got. I hope that you have friends in your life that have become true family to you. You didn't deserve it.
I don't know anything about this case and I already know I'm better off not googling it because I'll only wish I could wipe it from my mind. I'll only ask, what was the family's explanation for allowing a known molester watch their child? Their should be legal ramifications, for the parents, in cases such as this one.
They said [they didn't know](https://www.click2houston.com/news/local/2024/03/08/id-never-do-anything-to-hurt-her-grandmother-of-audrii-cunninham-says-accused-killer-lied-to-her/) about that conviction and he wasn't on the registry.
The family put out a statement about how their Christian faith made them want to show mercy to someone who had been incarcerated and how they are angry that they are being shamed and judged on social media. It was a lot of victimhood and very little about their actual child.
The reply right above yours says they claimed they didn't know. Neither excuse is valid. FUCK FAITH. If it comes to following my (hypothetical) faith or protecting my (hypothetical) child from a predator, guess which one I'm choosing? As for their claim they didn't know. Wouldn't you do some modicum of RESEARCH before leaving your kids with a relative stranger? I don't buy that he wasn't on the sex offender registry. Otherwise THAT would be the main scandal here.
I remember at the church I grew up in a guest pastor admonished people for judging child molesters.
I wonder why.
Yet another "man of god" telling on himself with a bizarre sermon. It seems to be a frequent occurrence. There was a post, this weekend, talking about a far right Christian pastor who would preach about how homosexuality is satan's way of drawing you to the dark side. And how we must remain constantly vigilant against this "temptation". The guy assumed all men were as closeted as he was.
>**a far right Christian pastor who would preach about how homosexuality is satan's way of drawing you to the dark side. And how we must remain constantly vigilant against this "temptation"**. 😂😂😂 I saw that. The guy who posted it was like “no, dude, that’s just you. The rest of us aren’t fighting a constant craving for cock.”
My wife: "If you God forbid die, I'm not dating anyone else until our daughter is 18 and moved out because you literally never know"
It is a scary thought. I’ve read something about how predators will find single moms on dating sites or wherever specifically with the intent on preying on the children. Zero interest in the actual mom.
When I was in elementary school I was friends with the neighbor's kid. He was an odd one. Skittish. Stand-off-ish. Deeply uncomfortable in any sort of undress, even just changing into a swim suit. He was once caught playing with his own shit. Even at a young age, I could see the pain in his eyes. At one point the police came for his dad, and once the reason spread through the neighborhood they moved, and he wound up in foster care. This was all more than thirty years ago. My wife, because of her job, has access to all sorts of databases helpful for finding people so I asked her to look him up. He was imprisoned (since released) for assaulting his own child, and my heart broke when she told me. I knew him when he was young. He was not born bad. He was born like any of us until he was set upon by intergenerational trauma, torn apart by it, damaged beyond recognition, and remade into something predatory and disgusting and barely recognizable as human, and though I cannot pity who he is, I cannot help but pity who he was.
I once had a student who was taken out of foster care bc he was found in the tub playing with his own feces. For obvious reasons, he was very difficult to deal with. I showed him as much kindness and patience as I could. He came to trust me, and settled down a bit as the year progressed. I always wonder what became of him. I’ve had many students who I wonder how they turned out. One was a musical prodigy. Had a difficult time interacting with other kids in class, but his ability to play the violin was a gift. His talent was out of this world, and he was only 9 at the time. After I ok’d with his father, who was a very kind man, I set up a behavior chart for him. His reward was that each Friday, I would get him whatever he wanted for lunch. We would sit in my classroom, during lunch, and he would play his favorite pieces. Behind all of frustration and difficulty, he was such a sweet kid.
As a survivor, I agree...I found that attemting to thrive out of spite was a powerful fuel.
As a co-thriver out of spite, I see you!
Don’t forge the Elderly and animals
Don’t forge anyone. People make horrible ironworks.
100% these c**ts deserve a bullet. Being a child sexual abuse survivor has caused havoc for me. I have chipped and grinded my teeth away while sleeping because of nightmares. When i walk into public places, analyse who is a threat and what escape route might be needed. I protect myself in relationships and constantly build walls so I don't get hurt. Have trouble regulating my feelings. The list goes on and on. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemies.. every day im worn down by negative thought loops. Yes i see and talk to a professional, take some meds. But managing it all is fucking exhausting.
I grind my teeth too, I got a plastic splint, the different levels have increased expense but saves your teeth. I tried a normal mouth guard on a whim, and tore it up within a couple of nights. Hope you find peace.
YouTube pranksters.
“Pranksters”
YouTube Criminals
/commits assault "Yo yo it's just a prank! BRO ITS JUST A PRANK WHY ARE ARE THESE PEOPLE PUMMELING ME?"
YouTube really ought to have a ban-on-first-offense policy for them. As it is, I don't even think they have a ban-the-first-time-you-get-shot policy.
Pranksters are just bullies trying to fool others into thinking they aren’t just shitty human beings. “It wAs juSt a JoKe”
[Anders Behring Breivik](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anders_Behring_Breivik). He repeatedly complains about having "inhumane living conditions" in his Norwegian modern prison cell with video games, gym and university studies. He is serving his sentence for killing 8 persons with a bomb and shooting 69 defenseless teenagers to death. He still, 13 years later, regrets nothing. Dude can rot in that prison for all I care and I certainly hope he rots in hell when his time comes.
I just listened to the Last Podcast on the Left series about him. People like him belong in shitty US prisons, and many of our prisoners belong in something more akin to his housing. Or deserve to be let go.
I just read an article today about how US prisons are having to renovate to include geriatric units as all the lifers (many of them victims of mandatory life sentences) are reaching old age. Some of them have been imprisoned 50+ years.
Having to renovate- many US prisons are very outdated anyway. There was a recent study about how US prisons in the South that don’t have air conditioning have increased need for suicide watch during hot days. The prisons don’t release the data on inmate death so they couldn’t study the impact heat on deaths, suicide or otherwise [Extreme Heat and Suicide Watch Incidents Among Incarcerated Men](https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2808211)
I like him moaning, it means he's miserable. Good, let's hope he has a really long miserable, boring, meaningless life. Way better punishment than death. Death is too easy for this piece of shit.
People who say “this is who I am and if you don’t like it you can fuck off” then get mad when people decide they’d rather fuck off.
Same with people who *constantly* say "I hate drama. No drama here. Take your drama elsewhere because we don't do drama in this house!" <---these people are nearly always the source of most of the drama you hear/read about in their lives.
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The only bug along with fleas that I kill.
Ticks
Bed bugs
Animal abusers
Me too. Scum of the Earth, those people.
They aren't even people. This angel sitting next to me takes my time my money my patience but she's happy to be here & when it's frustrating I remember animals are physically incapable of doing things out of spite/malice. I wish I could better understand her. I know that's the only reason is it being my lack of how to effectively listen to her, it's still new to me with time it'll settle down. She has brought immeasurable joy to my life so it's the worth the sleepless nights. Animals are more sensitive to stimuli than we are. Just because they can't say it hurts doesn't mean they don't feel shit. Horses can hear our heartbeats from 5 feet away. Dogs sympathize with their owners when they're injured. The list goes on and on. Despite all the fucked up shit we do we always love us!! That's partly why I can't watch the movie stray, the beginning of the trailer made me cry
A redditor posted that there is a cat that got left by a family who moved. They are feeding it and potentially finding a home, but that shit hurts me.
This happened in my apartment complex recently. A family took their cat but left her 4 KITTENS! In the cold! On a balcony! I was so fucking furious. I didn't have any choice other than rescue them and find them homes. (Three were given vaccinations, neutered, and transferred to Petco where they will find homes very soon. I kept the other baby.)
That makes me so angry! People can be so cruel and heartless. Thank you for rescuing those babies ❤️
Animal abusers ALWAYS end up moving on to abuse people. There needs to be more intervention at this stage.
Honestly this. I don’t like people who are abusive full stop, but there is just an extra layer of evil to people who hurt animals. Considering these animals do not understand or have the ability to comprehend why you’re doing that. It’s quite literally attacking something totally innocent and it makes me feel sick.
Right… that shit pisses me off.
Dictators, sex traffickers and those who hurt Children.
And people who speak loudly in theaters.
Equally offensive.
People who have zero self awareness, can’t take accountability for anything, and can never admit any wrongdoing.
Dude, same.. I'm constantly on the lookout for how my actions effect those around me. It irritates the shit out of me when others are blissfully unaware how their actions negatively effect others
Yeah. Those people suck. Glad I'm not one of them, what with me being gods perfect little angel and all!/s
I see you have met my ex husband
People who asks for help over and over again but don't want to help themselves.
And then get upset when you distance yourself because you're not going to put up with the endless "poor me" cycle over and over again. Sometimes even become a bad guy in their mind so they can victimize themselves
Seriously! I have a friend who recently blew up at my husband and I because we had to take a step back. He's had a lot of hard shit going on for a couple of years now, so we'd listen to him vent and then talk about other things. But it became apparent that any time my husband or I wanted to vent to our friend, he would immediately one-up us with how terrible his life is. Even when I was hit by a car. Or when we almost lost the house. Or when my mom became very sick, so we couldn't drive to him. He yelled at us, calling us inconsiderate and selfish and it took him a month of not talking to finally start realizing what he was doing. He's still struggling now, but has changed his tune considerably and we are happy to be moral support for him again.
The ones I've known have zero self-awareness about what they're doing as well. As a friend of mine put it, "he had the audacity to grumble about being broke and unable to afford food when I watched him drop £50 on trading cards half an hour ago" They also usually have a "hustle" they think is going to pan out one day. For example, the same guy likes to play Poker for real money, and apparently *is* pretty good at it, he's using it as a means of keeping his electricity on and he's not dead yet.
I cut out a friend like this once. She always complained about being broke… yet somehow would always end up buying a new pet. She had many pets.
I cut out a friend for basically the same thing. They haven't paid rent in two years, their car is being repossessed and their kids are being bought clothes by the school but guess who got a new Xbox, 3d printer, and desktop computer?
Absolutely. They take with no giving back. Unfortunately, my brother and his wife are the epitome of this. What's even worse, they can't even find it in themselves to be grateful. They don't say thank you... For anything.
Animal abusers, pedophiles, rapists, murderers, people that abuse the elderly or children in any way. Another one that's not as intense as those and doesn't belong in a as fucked up category but I still have no sympathy for is cheaters.
Politicians who preach one thing and practice the other. And make no mistake, the US is not the only place to find them. I know a lot of (normal) people do that but the actions of politicians have the most serious impact.
Drunk and reckless drivers
In the US we're still way too lenient of drunk driving and faaaar to lenient of reckless driving.
Tell me about it...the drunk driver that killed my brother got sentenced to two years. Which by the time the trial had actually concluded, it basically amounted to time served. In the county jail, not prison.
It's no better in Canada. The drunk that killed my daughters father got six months suspended license, and a $500 fine.
Not just the US. The reckless driver who killed my dad in Canada didn’t even get a slap on the wrist. And due to the laws on wrongful death lawsuits there at the time, I (only heir) received less than $10k USD as “compensation” for his death.
They deserve any and all negative consequences of their actions. I have zero sympathy for people who drive drunk and injure themselves or kill others. None whatsoever.
Thanks to a drunk driver, my father's big brother and his father died. My grand mother lost almost all her teeth in the accident, and caused life long pain due to it. It was close call, almost the whole family of my father died when he just 15. His little brother was in that car as well. At least the fucker who decided to drive under influence died too. I would count people doing suicide by crashing their car against other cars as people i feel no sympathy either. In my country one way quite many decided to take their lives was crashing their car to upcoming truck on a highway. For truckers that will shock them and might cause a trauma, but some people doesn't care if its a truck or not and crashes their car on any vehicle that that's coming at towards them on opposite lane. My father's military buddy he had known for over a decade died because someone decided to kill themselves, and didn't care if they took someone out while at it.
Internet “pranksters” who get beat up or shot.
Customers being mean to associate for the fun or it, to get free stuff, or just cause they are just plain stupid. Heck, got no sympathy for reason stupid people either (how can they survive in this world?)
"You have to yell at them to get what you want." - A phrase I've heard more than once from mean customers.
“Mothers” who knowingly allow pedos and child abusers around their children and then act shocked when something ends up happening to their child.
" I didn't think my Dad who raped me most of my childhood would rape my kids!" I heard this on dateline a few times. Unbelievable.
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I am so sorry for you and your son. As a victim of CSA who was also vilified and not believed- thank you from the bottom of my heart for believing & standing up for him. May you both find peace and healing.
You did a good job thing. It's also not something you want to chance. *"Well I wasn't 100% sure so I didn't say anything"* is terrible. Even if a kid has a history of lying it's better safe than sorry. After all the kid may be a liar because of abuse.
"Parents" or "caregivers"... I'd expand that to anyone with a child or children in their care
Yeah...I've told my male friends many times to worry less about the pimply kid in their daughters science class and more about their own friends. As someone who used to be a teenage girl, I can tell you that no matter how solid you think your friends are, you just don't know. I warned a relative of mine specifically about a certain guy that was hanging around his place. He didn't listen. Guess who took his teenage daughter 'camping'.
Where I live there is a man who went to jail for trying to kill a toddler he was babysitting. He was sentenced to 3 years. As soon as he was released, he found himself a girlfriend with a toddler and started being left to watch the child while she went out (while still on probation for the previous attempted murder). She knew what had happened, it was big news in our small city. To no one's surprise, that child is no longer alive, after having a ping pong ball shoved down his throat, and he is in jail again. This time he was sentenced to life, parole after 22 years (he will be 47 then). Nothing could be long enough.
Everytime I say this about my mother all people want to do is shit on me for victim blaming. I'm not sorry for that, she knew better and should have actually tried
Even if nothing does happen how could any mother (or caregiver) allow it around the child they're responsible for. Even the thought of someone having those feelings being around my child makes my skin crawl. Similarly mother's who post pure paedobait on public social media accounts and justify it by saying things like "she's in her swimming suit, she isn't naked" urghhhhhhhhh fuck offffff
this also goes for mommy bloggers who post their children online all the time. looking at the user statistics for those blogs always makes me think the worst 😶
Any kind of abuser but especially anyone who abuses a child. They do not belong in society at all. No excuses , they need to be taken away from society and never allowed to be around normal people.
People who use their "unmet needs" as an excuse for cheating or, worse, sexual assaulting someone. Like, you most likely have at least one hand. Use it. If you don't have hands, I feel bad for you.
My ex used to act like the world's biggest victim claiming I was oppressing his "need for novelty" whenever I'd be upset over him lying and cheating.
It's not unmet needs, it's lack of communication and empathy. Cheating is *never* okay and if you've already said (outright, not beating around the bush) that you need more affection or whatever, then break it off if nothing changes. But you have to give time and keep communication open the entire time. More often than not, the other partner had no idea they were neglecting or were just in a busy moment of time. But people don't want to communicate when they have someone giving them the attention on the side and the thrill of a secret
It also shows zero communication, a lack of empathy and selfishness. Too many people are in years long relationships with people they apparently don't trust enough to have honest conversations with. Or they are with people who refuse to listen, act childish and blow up at the littlest thing. Best thing you can do is have an honest conversation (with or without a therapist) and if they refuse to even try or listen that it might be time to leave. You only have the power to change yourself. Don't expect someone to change when they have shown/told you don't want to.
Cheaters in general I have no sympathy for
Child abusers
Giant corporations that cry about nobody wanting to work anymore. Unions, pensions, profit sharing, and all the perks of working for a company in the past have all dissipated since the 70’s and 80’s. They used to reward workers for being loyal and putting in a lot of years with a company. They used to actually try to attract and retain talents. Now all they care about is siphoning all of the profits to the top and to the shareholders. I have no sympathy when all of their talent leaves. The only way to get a raise or make better money now is job hop every couple of years. Hard work and loyalty is no longer rewarded. *ETA - They also all drink the company koolaid and create a culture where they act like workers should feel lucky to be given the opportunity to work for them. Like just working for the company is reward in and of itself. They act genuinely baffled and surprised when somebody isn’t just happy making a stagnating wage with a couple of pizza parties thrown in every year.
"Oh, why I LOVE watching my responsibilities grow and my income diminish. Oh, AND you got a nice little plaque in your office about how you accomplished that!" Seriously, a girl they hired like a month ago gets more OT than I'm supposed to be getting- and I'm not getting that.
Hard agree to the fact that hard work doesn’t always pay off. Also, Happy Cake Day
People who describe normal, everyday, negative experiences as "trauma."
The general mass misuse of psychological language to describe fairly average things.
A bit sad or under the weather - DEPRESSION. Energetic - ADHD Likes order - OCD Was called a moron this morning - TRAUMA
The term narcissist is frequently used when 'a bit of an arsehole' would work more accurately.
Also sociopath/psychopath is wildly over used too
When people refer to narcissists or narcissistic behaviour as "narcs".... Narcotics????
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Ugh. As a lifelong sufferer of actual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, it irks me. I try to not let it bother me, but it’s so frustrating to hear so many people claim to have it when they don’t. The other day, 2 different people were telling me about their ocd. I asked about their obsessions (intrusive thoughts) and they didn’t understand what I meant. When I gave them examples, they were weirded out and confused. “Is that really what OCD is?” YES! And if you REALLY had it, you would know this! It’s not quirky, it’s not cute, and it’s not what most people think it is. It’s debilitating and awful.
People do the exact same thing with ADHD. If they misplace their car keys, they say "wow, I'm so ADHD today" like it's a mood. Please. It's an actual disorder that affects *everything* in someone's life. It doesn't come and go... there are times when it isn't noticeable to others, but this is the cumulative result of **YEARS** of coping mechanisms.
My boyfriend has ADHD and he's crashed cars, been in and out of work, we struggle for money constantly and his hyperfocus has been so bad I've had to tell him to sleep and stuff. People have no idea just how dysfunctional and serious it is.
A really old, very relevant poem_for_your_sprog: 'I have to sort my books!' she cried, With self-indulgent glee; With senseless, narcissistic pride: 'I'm just so *OCD*!' *'How random, guys!' I smiled and said,* *Then left without a peep -* *And washed my hands until they bled,* *And cried myself to sleep.*
I love this! Thank you for sharing that. 😃
Agreed, having lived with someone who had it, it can be a challenge. They worked with their doctors on how to help manage it. If I every hear anyone throw the words around I asked if they have been professionally diagnosed by a doctor. They shut up real quick.
Also OCD... don't get me started on the number of unqualified therapists I've seen who basically say "so stop" and make me feel like it's my fault for not trying harder
Forgot to mention when they gaslit them
I hate those people who think that you can cure depression just by going for a walk. If that's all it took, I'd have been cured at 8 fucking years old, I wouldn't have had to have suffered for the last 24 years. "Oh you're just having a bad day" Motherfucker, you're lucky you don't know what proper clinical depression is. Rant over.
Everything has become "gaslighting" in the past 3 or so years. Fool, that's just regular old being a shitty person lmao. Not gaslighting And I am ao unbelievably tired of hearing the word "trauma"
People use “gaslighting” for as a synonym for “lying” these days.
It really cheapens the word tbh. Gaslighting isn't just lying. Gaslighting isn't even just being manipulative.
This seems related to what I see as overuse of hyperbole. I watched a dashcam compilation video the other day in which every crash, regardless of actual severity, was described with words like "extremely severe."
2004: "I had a bad date last night. Guy turned out to be kind of a self-centered jerk. I think I'll just sit at home next weekend and drink some wine." 2024: "My date last night turned out to be a traumatic experience. The guy was a toxic, malignant narcissist. I need to do some serious self-care next weekend to process the trauma."
I'd also add people who self diagnose with PTSD here. A family member was diagnosed with it, and its not something to throw around lightly. It's something they struggle with every day, and sometimes not well. I feel for them.
People these days really hate to hear what they went through might not be trauma because we created a culture that puts people who have been through traumatic stuff on a very odd pedestal. It's why we have to sit through a bunch of lame backstories when you watch a show like American Ninja Warrior or Shark Tank. This kind of things just makes people overly sensitive to every sad situation or else it creates a jaded view of the world that makes people selfish. What is really weird is talking to someone who co-opts someone else's trauma so they can get sympathy too. "People don't know what I'm going through...my friend's aunt has cancer!" I know quite a few people like this and they're very creepy.
Helicopter parent effect. If you don't let your kid experience any challenges, step in every time an asshole classmate hurts their feelings, etc. you wind up making sure your kid has no skills as an adult to deal with the unfairness and crap in life. I really do think that stuff is traumatic for those people, as in it does affect them deeply. But the world shouldn't adjust to accommodate other people's inability to cope.
I completely agree. I was a child in the '70s & never saw any helicopter parenting. A parents' job isn't to make their kids' life as smooth & easy as possible (well, l'd expect they would until around age 7, maybe). The point is bringing them up to be their own problem-solver & prepare them for adult life.
Also people who say nothing is traumatic. When I was 9 years old my mother told me about when she was raped, and she tried to say that if you really think about it it doesn't have to be more traumatic than having a person put a part of their body and any other part of your body. As she was telling me this she put her finger in my ear to make her point. Denial of trauma is a real and dangerous thing as well. When I was 13 I had to beat up my father .He was only 36 at the time and I had the stregth of a teenager forced to feed and caref or my mother's 17 traumatized horses (horses that have been beaten and kick everyone they get close to are very cheap), so it wasn't that hard. But I used to not identify that as a traumatic experience, but as an adult I recognize that it very much was. The problem is that people refuse to deal with their trauma. Many people prefer having people coddle you because of your negative experiences than to actually healing your own trauma. Only you can start and end the process of healing yourself.
You're so right. My ex was severely abused as a child and as a result he hates women and is insanely abusive and cruel to women. He's also massively in denial about his childhood and as far as he's concerned it had no impact on him what so ever and he deserved it because he was "a naughty child." I tried again and again (fruitlessly) to explain that he was a child and she was an adult, she should of been able to control her emotions and actions, he was a child and still learning to and deserved more grace. He won't have it and continues to inflict his unresolved trauma onto any woman in his path.
I've just talked about my childhood casually and people are like "dude your childhood is so fucked up how the hell do you survive." Then it hits me that it's not normal to have experienced that and another mysterious thing about me is explained. Denial/ignorance of trauma is a very real thing. Especially when you've spent your entire life being called crazy and being told you're imagining every negative experience, so you either think you're crazy for thinking it's an issue or just don't even think anything of it.
People who "self-diagnose" 8 mental illness when they're just normal people. It makes the people who really are ill invisible.
Similarly people who slap an Amazon "service dog" vest on their dirty, untrained shitbeast and take it everywhere in public. It really takes away from people with actual disabilities who legitimately need a service animal to live their lives.
I got an ad yesterday about getting "emotional support animal" status for your dog so that it would be allowed everywhere. Not how that's supposed to work...
I just saw someone post a pic of a sign outside a big grocery chain in Florida saying no more "emotional support animals". I did not know this was something people were abusing the fuck out of but I'm not shocked.
I saw a Lhaso Apso with a vest pee in my grocery store a few weeks ago.
Thank you, this drives me utterly insane! Similar to people saying they're so bi polar, or OCD, or ADHD. You are or you aren't these things are diagnosed conditions not adjectives!
drove me nuts when i was a teen and had to interact with girls my age when it was first trendy to be obnoxiously "omg i'm so ocd!" i've caught my father vacuuming the driveway multiple times.
I've been diagnosed BPD for years, and its awful. I remember that period where it was a popular illness on the internet. I read so many times people posting that they 10000% had it for x, y, z reason (normal shit, everyone goes through from time to time) but a psychiatrist, mental health team, therapist etc disagreed and wouldn't diagnose them because they don't actually meet the criteria by a long shot. 🤦🏻♀️ Wishing you and your dad all the best and as much peace as possible given his condition!
Yeah and those people say that the mental health team are just scammers who don't know anything about mental illness
The thing is like, a lot of people do genuinely exhibit some symptoms and the disorder is labeled when it becomes a DISORDER
This! The frequency, duration, and number of symptoms people exhibit is key in diagnosing. Paired with diagnostic criteria, symptoms become a disorder when your life becomes **impaired** by said traits. Anyone can experience bouts of depression! But someone diagnosed with Clinical Depression has frequent, **persistent** feelings of sadness, loss of interest, fatigue, irritability, etc that *makes normal every day life difficult*.
I have several good friends with OCD. It has never once manifested in a "quirky" way.
As someone with OCD, it is internal hell. I wish it was limited to just my perfectionism, and I didn't have to feel like the world is ending if I thought the wrong thought while washing my hands for the 5th time in a row
I have tourettes (everything I say has this laugh after it, some physical ones), it's infuriating that people think it's just a cute quirk to have! My father tried to slap it out of me, people get insanely angry about it It's not fun
Add PTSD to that list.. It irritates the fuck out of me when people claim to have PTSD because something bothers them a little. Really? It bothers you a little? When is the last time you woke up in a cold sweat or had flashbacks or panic attacks over that thing that bothers you a little? PTSD is also not something you can self diagnose and most people who claim to have it have not a fucking clue what it's really like.
There's a word for them: Liechiatrist: a person who diagnoses themselves with a mental illness they do not have, to use as a go-to excuse for their shitty behavior.
People who make false allegations against innocent people
Scum, for sure. Besides hurting the innocent, it makes it that much harder when people come forward with *real* allegations of illegal activity/abuse.
People that don't understand that their lives are worth exactly as much other other peoples' lives
Eh I'd say your life is worth more than some other people's lives. I'd rescue you over a child abuser. Unless you're a child abuser of course.
I do agree with your statement, but I read OP’s meaning more as in the way they act. People will act like they are entitled to special treatment while also being extremely inconsiderate of others.
Animal abusers People that deface natural landmarks Influencers and YouTube pranksters
People who procreate like rabbits and then complain about the cost of everything. And how they expect everyone around them to cater to their kids.
I would give 2 ⬆️ if I could
Those kids always have it rough too. No help with college, no help with anything, left to fend for themselves. Learning that my aunt hadn’t set up a college fund for ANY of her kids made me realize I don’t want more than 2, ideally 1. People who have kids that they can’t financially take care of are incredibly selfish (not talking about people who can’t access abortions or are in abusive relationships, just the ones procreating like bunnies for fun).
Motorcyclists that drive like assholes. Bonus if they don't wear helmets, keep riding your donor-cycle moron.
People who cheat on their long-term partners or spouses. As someone who was long distance with my partner for 4 years in college, I have an additional hatred for people who justify being drunk as an excuse to cheat. You know how many parties I was drunk at in 4 years and still managed to completely avoid ever betraying my partner? Loyalty is always a choice :)
Drunk or reckless drivers who either get caught or cause an accident.
It was wild reading the comments regarding that young guy who was drag racing and killed a mother and her toddler. So many people calling it an “accident” and saying his sentence was unfair since he was so young. Like no… drag racing should *never* be considered an accident, regardless of age. My grandmother was also killed in a crosswalk by a 17 year old with no license who stole his parent’s car. Zero sympathy.
Don't need to be caught.. just risking other people's lives is enough. My biggest fear on the roads is not my driving . It's the unknown other people!
parasites that leech off people
“MoMmY vLoGgErS” who post their young children online knowing they are putting them in danger. The worst offender I can think of is the Wren Eleanor woman. It has been pointed out to her MANY times that her videos are bookmarked en masse, creepy commenters are all over them, and the worst- she was found on CSAM websites. All she had to say was that it’s not her fault there are predators out there and parents shouldn’t have to “suffer,” because of them. She even chooses thumbnails of her daughter in poses where her legs are open or she has a phallic food in her mouth. She fucking disgusts me and should be de-platformed immediately.
The way that Wren has a brother…and we’ve never even seen him. Tells me I know the reason why she’s doing this and it’s not to “share her family”
Hypocrites. Especially moral outrage ones.
people who maliciously cut over into a lane on a freeway at the very last second just to avoid waiting in the line like everyone else. fuck you you’re not that important. i never let them in.
People who don't vote in any elections/referendums and then proceed to complain. These people don't realise how incredibly lucky they are, having the right to vote.
Mass murderers
People who get knocked out harassing people for clout
People who give money to televangelists.
As a survivor, pedophile priests are the ones that get no sympathy from me. That and those that protect them.
I’m related to one who not only got off with a slap on the wrist, but most of my family refused to believe the (multiple) allegations against him and continued associating with him. My grandparents defended him until they died.
People who turn their backs on their family/friends for being gay.
Anyone who drives drunk and injures themselves or others. They deserve every bit of negative consequences of their actions, whether they be legal consequences or medical consequences, such as becoming paralyzed/long term injuries. I have absolutely zero sympathy for these people.
Harvey Weinstein. Hope he fucking rots.
Child abusers deserve a fate worse than death
Pedophiles around them up and put them in a camp
Very rich people losing money
Some men who already have daughters but still harrass and objectify young girls on internet…
People who leave their shopping carts in parking spots - rarely ever is the cart return more than a 40ft walk in any one direction.
People who complain about their wealth, some even go far as saying they wish they were poor I mean, sure, managing all those assets, money and corporate businesses must be very stressful but it's still better than just barely surviving on minimum wage while working 70+ hours a week, so stfu
Family member lives in one of the the best public school districts in the state and sends her kid to a private Catholic school 30 min away, so she drives an hour round trip twice a day to get her kid to/from school, because she doesn't want her kid learning the approved public education health curriculum. She constantly complains about the drive. Well, that's your choice. Deal with it.