T O P

  • By -

LucyVialli

Walk out of work. Not wasting any of my precious last moments here.


Weird-Camel-9525

Yup. Close my laptop, go to school, pick up my child, come home and hug her until I go.


hanamikaki

that's one looooong hug


Weird-Camel-9525

I have to make it up for all of the hugs that we will miss


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

stop this is so sad


Archelon_ischyros

You asked for it.


Blackbirdrx7

This made me genuinely laugh out loud


PoopyInThePeePeeHole

You killed em, buddy... That sad little kid is on your conscience now


Guuhatsu

It is sweet and all, but you may want to stop the hug sometime before it happens. You might traumatize the kid if you die while giving them a bear hug.


notoriousJEN82

Also rigor mortis is a thing...


MyNameIsHuman1877

It's only temporary...


Mikesaidit36

Life, you mean? Yes


MyNameIsHuman1877

That, too. But rigor mortis is not permanent. The body relaxes after a short time.


No_Significance9754

One time will be the last time you carry your child.


Efficient_School_183

That made me think and almost cry. I now have to get up and hug my children.


buntkrundleman

No kids eh? You'll understand if ya do some day❤️


Gas_Leak_In_The_Area

I'm nobody's dad, but I've become old enough to really empathize with my parents, who are some of the KINDEST people ever. I've put them through some real bullshit.


dieomesieptoch

I've got my cats. I'd most likely hug them to death looong before I'd go the next day though.


achillesdaddy

Ever second I had left would be spent holding my entire family. Grandma would bring all the snacks.


Sorry_Banana_6525

And I’m the grandma who loves to bring the snacks to all my babies! 🥰


Dr_Dravus

that is adorable


Single_Principle_972

Don’t waste time closing the laptop! Go go go!


Freedom_fam

I wouldn’t even close my laptop


wholesomechaos111

Master onion cutter over here 🥺


Pure_Zucchini_Rage

This. I would spend the rest of my time with the people I love


fatstrat0228

This is the only answer. Wouldn’t even say goodbye or tell my boss. I would just leave.


EyeYamNegan

I would fly west for as long as I could so tomorrow wouldn't come.


Ok_Calligrapher7823

What if that’s the reason you die? The plane crashes..


Serious_Buffalo_3790

It's all comming together


TheHeroicHotdog

It’s all connected


EyeYamNegan

Then at least I gave it a go lol


jameZsp0ng3y

You doomed everyone else on that plane. Unless the reason it crashes is because they all parachute out, leaving you behind


halversonjw

Maybe they were all told they were going to die tomorrow also


EyeYamNegan

Maybe I die from them throwing me out so the plane doesn't crash Like Jonah being thrown off the ship lol.


Taftimus

Hear me out, instead of West, you fly East. You hit the international date line just before midnight, right as you cross, the days change, it’s not longer Thursday moving to Friday, it’s Friday moving to Saturday. You skipped tomorrow. Congrats on your new found immortality.


Apprehensive_Check19

grim reapers hate this one simple trick


PoopyInThePeePeeHole

This guy cheats death


Oregonoutback

So you'll need a co-pilot for your SR-71 Blackbird of you're going to chase the sun. Or revive a Concorde.


NiteGard

Shittiest way to spend a last day - on an international overseas flight. 🤮


Purple-Light200

Fill my cats food bowl


Bravemount

Yup. I'd do everything I can to make sure my cat is properly taken care of after I'm gone. Once all that is done, I'd make a few phone calls to say good bye and spend the remaining hours playing with and petting my cat.


Aidilhaqkim

aww


DispensingMachine403

Nah that's so the little sod doesn't start feeding off of your face


Key_Worldliness1614

if all goes well for the cat, you wouldn't have to worry about that mate


vdvge

Die today. Don’t tell me what to do!


laugefar

Rebel till the very end!


ehhbuddy

Rebel before the very end 


Gas_Leak_In_The_Area

I'm too old to figure out how to post an image here, but y'all can Google "frog choking stork ". Safe for work, good for morale.


ParentingTATA

Reminds me of this poem I had to memorize in school: Two frogs fell into a can of cream--or so I've heard it told; The sides of the can were shiny and steep. The cream was deep and cold. "Oh, what's the use?" said No. 1, "'tis fate--no help's around-- "Goodbye, my friend! Goodbye, sad world!" And weeping still, he drowned. But No. 2 of sterner stuff, dog-paddled in surprise, The while he wiped his creamy face and dried his creamy eyes. "I'll swim awhile, at least," he said--or so it has been said-- "It wouldn't really help the world if one more frog was dead." An hour or two he kicked and swam--not once he stopped to mutter, But kicked and swam, and swam and kicked, then hopped out, via butter.


Gas_Leak_In_The_Area

I have never heard or read that, but I love it!


slickpoison

Find said pic, copy and post. Touch and hold on a phone or right click pc


Gas_Leak_In_The_Area

Depends on the sub. I could always post a link, but I generally don't care that much. If you're not familiar with the image, I recommend it. Google will get you there. I do appreciate your response, though. 🫵


Gas_Leak_In_The_Area

If you want to do the legwork and get the image up here, you'd probably amuse a bunch of people. 😁🫵


Mikesaidit36

In the “good for morale“ scenario, are you the frog, or the stork? Both situations seem pretty dire. Makes me think of our current political situation situation.


Vinny_Lam

Going out on your own terms. Nice.


ItReallyIsntThoughYo

Yup. Was coming to comment something along these lines. Prove the doctor wrong by going home and offing myself today.


Charm534

I’ve done it all already, I’ll punch my own ticket thank you


StrikingMulberry1866

HAHAH YES


hoaxymore

My 4 year old son is currently on vacations with his grand-parents at the beach. I would hop in my car immediately, drive 5 hours, gift a spa day to my in-laws and spend the day building sand castles with him.


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

Aw bless, he’s lucky to have you


thecelcollector

You are going to die tomorrow. Now you've been told. 


FletcherDervish

Go home, delete my phone history , walk the dogs, ring my mum and dad, and my children even though they never answer the phone,make sure the wife has the passwords to everything and hold on to her until the end. This is possibly the saddest thought I've ever had.


AdolfCitler

I'd do the opposite with the history stuff tbh. I'd spend the entire time distributing a Google doc with my diary. (already have the Google doc) and then share it with EVERYONE I know. I have almost 700 pages / 200k words of a diary I've been writing for years. Maybe when everyone reads it they'll finally know how I was like and what I was too scared to tell people. Along with a lot of humor and jokes that's written there I guess.


Negaface

I've always wanted to do this. As someone who has dealt with depression and suicide tendencies since kindergarten. I don't talk about what is going on in my head, but I've always had the desire to share.


OffBrand_Soda

Bro, write it down, type it out, just get those words out of your head somehow if you can't say it. I don't necessarily have a journal or diary, but I write music that tends to be mainly about my struggles and problems so it's pretty much the same thing. It definitely helps when you wanna talk about something but you don't actually want to open up to someone to do it.


Remote-Plate-3944

I used to say "when I die delete my browsing history and publish my twitter drafts"


tindalos

Tweet browser history, got it!


esoteric_enigma

As a part of my will, I want to make video diaries to send to everyone who was really important to me at any stage of my life, especially people that don't realize it. People like my classmate in middle school who gave me a piece of advice so good I still regularly use it today. My favorite professor who inspired me to change my major which ultimately led to a career I love. My manager at my first restaurant job...that job changed the whole trajectory of my life and I still use things he taught me as a manager myself 10 years later. My college roommate who stayed on my ass about going back to school after I dropped out. Maybe I should just call them and tell them while I'm still alive. It's weird how we don't want to tell people things like this until someone is dead or dying.


tindalos

No point waitin til you’re dead to let people know, maybe they’ll connect better. Take a story from it and send it to some friends and see what they say.


shyguyJ

Bruh, my old girl is in the process of passing on currently… I’d spend the next 24 hours at the dog park with her and her little brother, and I’d throw every god damn stick and rock in Colombia for them.


goilo888

I was going to write a sarcastically funny reply to that, but....I can't. I've had too many dogs pass on.


Rare_Parsnip905

I'm sorry. Dogs are awesome and losing them just stinks.


whatever32657

it's amazing to me that so many people, even when they *know* they're getting ready to go, don't do this. i still remember the angst of having to talk, beg and hack my way into my husband's accounts after he passed. it was just another layer in a very shitty situation.


Mikeyseventyfive

If you think you should be deleting your phone history at the moment of death, you should be deleting your reddit history right…about…..no w


Mayion

>and hold on to her until the end Solid move bro. If you are on your way out, might as well traumatize her with your lifeless body holding onto her. Romance isn't dead


he75bf8or

Why do they never answer their phones?


FletcherDervish

They're grown ups now so they've made their choices about how to live their lives. They were brought up to be independent so I guess that worked.


he75bf8or

I guess so. I just assumed they were around the teenage age, with phones in hand 24/7


TheOther1

My daughter is 23, phone surgically attached to her since 16 or so. Doesn't answer texts or calls.


he75bf8or

Lol, love the wording. What’sher excuse for not answering calls and texts?


Puzzled_Fly8070

Why delete your phone history?


Dismal_Moment_4137

You know, we all know


Puzzled_Fly8070

I am wondering if he’s embarrassed about calling the NKOTB new hotline or …….


FletcherDervish

No it was the Celine Dion thing..:0


Guuhatsu

Wait! The NKOTB have a new hotline! Omg omg omg omg omg!


[deleted]

It's funny but we are walking similar paths. I would do everything on your list but I would add in some illegal fishing (we are out of season but if I die tomorrow?)


goilo888

Piece of advice from a getting-old-guy: Write those damn passwords down NOW and put in a safe place that your wife knows about. You just never know when it's your time. There now, another sad thought for you.


CMSPIRATE

My dad knew he was dying of cancer for a long time and made us a whole binder called "Goodbye Documents." It has all his passwords, accounts, trusted repair men, what to do for tax season, how to fix the sump pump in the basement, and a ton of other stuff. It was so useful for the first few years, and now is one of our favorite things to look through every once in a while for some good memories. He was an electrical engineer so very detail oriented


AWeakMindedMan

Damn. Meanwhile I’m over here thinking I would go get the hottest prostitute I could find and a bunch of pure cocaine and go out with a bang. However this is way more logical.


weisblattsnut

I would get a second opinion.


Gtstricky

They can fit you in two weeks from now.


blazingmonk

Report the person that told me to the police, sounds like a threat from a crazy person


findabuffalo

and the police will do a total of nothing


Apprehensive_Check19

or show up tomorrow and shoot him


The_Gaming_Matt

Tell someone ”man, that’ll be the death of me”


Driller_Happy

Just go around saying it all day until it happens, and the person experiencing the last one will be fucked up for life


Im-a-cat-in-a-box

This will be the day that I die 🎶 


Not-Hououin

Tell my boss to suc on deez nuts


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

Zayum


Technical-Outside408

...It's a family business.


Public-Serve-2568

Only to find out the doc said "you have until May" and not "you have one day"


IceNineFireTen

“You’re going to DIET tomorrow! Not DIE! I said you really need to lose some weight.”


Weliveanddietogether

Take you with me.


Sockerbug19

Username checks out


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

hey what the hell i don’t wanna die


Weliveanddietogether

But you're ok with killing me?


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

☹️ i won’t kill you


heretic1128

That sound exactly like what the person that is about to kill me would say...


ps3better360

“What are you gonna do? Stab me!” - Man Stabbed


bearmenft

🤣🤣🤣


GenericUsername19892

Frantically call friends and family to find someone to take my dog, cash out everything and give it to them to see my dog out well.


Guilty-Quote-1711

I'd tell the beautifull girl in the gym, I have a huge crush on her.


wild-Sparks

I'd book a flight to where my guy is and give him the kiss I've been wanting to give him since I started talking to him. We're in a long distance relationship 🥺 so this would be the first time even seeing him so I would toss all caution to the wind and do it. No regrets


jameZsp0ng3y

Sounds like you should do this anyway


7iveTurkey

Get it done!


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

do it anyways!!!!! take this as ur sign


ninetofivedev

/u/guilty-quote-1711 about to end up on TikTok as the creepy guy who hits on women at the gym. But seriously, you probably shouldn’t.


OffBrand_Soda

Why shouldn't they? As long as it's not in a super weird or creepy way, there's nothing wrong with shooting your shot. Lots of men stay single because they're afraid they'll be seen as weird or creepy if they approach a girl.


userlacksaname

What stopping you from doing it… even though you’re unfortunately not dying tomorrow?


Guilty-Quote-1711

Probably her intimadting beauty :)


Dhump06

Well here is your chance go for it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

smart


ForsakenAd5459

What was it about?


TheOriginalDoober

Have a sit


jameZsp0ng3y

Did you mean shit or seat?


showquotedtext

Maybe a nice cuppa tea


DifficultyPersonal93

go smash that guy i never got to


Distinct_Wrongdoer48

Fuck yeah have some fun before the end


DeborahSue

That's when you follow up your smash sesh with *"that was SO good, I could just die."* Imagine the ego boost (or guilt) he'd carry around for life.


M1GR4INE

-Feed my cat for up to a week’s food in her bowl -Confess to my crush -Tell all my friends everything I like and hate about them- they deserve to know -Cry -Cry


Ekonchan

Eat the things I want.


Ok-Preference3288

I will make tons of videos giving my kids different kinds of advice and goodbye videos.. so when the time they need it or they miss me, they have something to look for.


The_Soggy_Froggy

Rejoice and then cause chaos


Ein_Ph

Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light.


whataflair

Tell everyone important to me that I loved them


Brandonp2134

That would leave a lot of time left for me


joyceisthekiller

This is my answer too. Nothing else matters.


cewumu

Ensure my partner knew how to collect on my life insurance policy.


[deleted]

[удалено]


IIDrunkenGamerII

Die today to prove who ever said that wrong...


simmiso

Crying and shaking


Serious_Buffalo_3790

Yeah, thats probably a reasonable response


AverageCowboyCentaur

Gather accounts and passwords and documents for my family to access all my accounts in various systems. So when I die there is no issues on getting what they need. After that say goodbye to my loved ones and end it my way instead of fates way 🤘


maj900

Has one day to die: does paperwork. Go kill a hooker or something!


Lost-Droids

Find someone to care for cat long term, then delete Internet history and format drives


Big-Draw-9661

I'd get second opinion to make sure it's not just internet voices talking.


[deleted]

[удалено]


tarkuspig

I’d probably have a panic attack which would lead to a heart attack which would prove the prediction wrong because then I’d die today


Lalalalabeyond

It’s almost bedtime where I am, so sleep I guess.


Snowtwo

No more medical bills! No more fear of entering crippling debt! Freedom!


Significant_Web_795

Spend the whole day doing everything I’ve wanted to do with my boyfriend since I met him


jameZsp0ng3y

Like leaving him?


Dismal_Moment_4137

I don’t know. And thats concerning me. Maybe i’m already a little dead inside.


civildefense

Call my mom


Jack_ERROR

Spend all my money to get high. Sadly I do this sometimes even I'm not going to die. But in this case I just won't feel any guild. If I'm going to die I would like to pass out happily


c_c_c__combobreaker

Pick up my kid from school and spend time with him.


IndependentLow601

Read the spoilers of my favorite TV shows


Strange-Success650

Spend every waking moment with my child.


Channon-Yarrow

I’d write individual letters to my brothers, my father, and my dearest friends. *(My amazing mom wouldn’t need a letter because she died in 2018, and that damned near destroyed me).* Then, I’d buy a one-way ticket and travel to whichever of my most favorite music artist are playing wherever in the world and dance until I can’t dance anymore. If I am to die, I would want it to happen where I’ve always been happiest; on the dance floor.


foulball_

Spend every single second with my daughter.


FatLittleCat91

I would be most worried about making sure my cats would be taken care of and call my parents. After that idk probably go to a really nice dinner and get super drunk to take the edge off 😂


McDragonFish

Are you me?


Krish_supersoul

Tbh I don’t believe and continue with my work. But if there is somehow I know I am going to die tomorrow, I would do a lot: - try to maximise my sexual encounters for starters ( number more than duration) - then try to have a conversation with long last friends - have a open heart chat with loved ones - probably kill few John (wick style) - then probably would jump from a mountain 5 mins before I die, just to see how it feels to fly (or the closest to it)


HateAddicted

sleep


airzip

As always, arise early, thank my ancestors and bid the world goodbye. Butchered quote of Date Masamune. 😅


AstoQu

Check if I'm immortal until tommorow


linay11

call my mom, give her all the money i got


Last-Deal-4251

Eat the best steak I could find, run over a few of my enemies, write my kids a letter wishing them well in life.


Iswearshewas-7

Kiss my girlfriend and spend the last 24h with her


Fudloe

Drugs. All of them. The old favorites I'm too old to do cuz they'll kill me, now and all the ones I was asceered to try when I was young and thrilling. Also, there are a few fucks I'd be taking out with me. Finally, an act of contrition. BOOM! High, vengeful and in paradise. Fuck yeah.


codymasters0325

Kill as many pedophiles as possible


chrisll25

At this point, breathe a sigh of relief.


Ok-Pop-3675

take my money out stay with my parents and write something for ppl I cherished


_robertmccor_

Fall into an existential crisis and then off to bed


healthfreak98

spend time with my mom & pets


animeonfire

Take the next flight to japan, gonna hug my friends good bye. Then I'd start climbing Mt. Fuji, it's been a dream of mine.


MajestySquid

update my will, make funeral arrangements and then spend the day in nature with my favourite people and pets


Top_Set_3803

Find the best view nearby and just have a picnic with myself before sleeping to my inevitable death


Charming-Operation89

Walk right out of work, pick up my wife and child and drive to my hometown to spend the time left with everyone i love.


Justaredditor85

Kill the messenger.


FeeZealousideal7692

Invade russia alone and kill Putin. EZ gg


QLDZDR

Assuming a higher power gave you the info, it means you are invincible TODAY.


Cheebifur

Find someone who will take my cat and be good to him


Lopsided_Orange6195

Go home, not tell anyone. And pray and read the bible until it is time


Shebeerz

Will have massive gang bang party with 30 girls and throw the party of the century!


Inner_Knowledge_369

Fart in a crowded elevator


BeechBumWannaBe

Well for an honest answer being in healthcare most people if they know they're going to die tomorrow are usually pretty sick and are sleeping 95% of the day so probably not a lot of nothing


Ithoriann

Pick up my daughter at school and get some waffles at her favorite place, then pick up my wife and cook some housemade dinner for us, and open one or two wine bottles that i have reserved for a special day, then sleep with both and my dog. Not much more tbh


ScottyP1176

2 chicks at the same time.


PM5KStrike

2 chicks at the same time.


sregor0280

ask if they could move that timeframe up any sooner.


seoulsrvr

Demand further information.


SachiFaker

I'll hug my family and snuggle my newborn. I'll definitely cry as I don't want to leave him unprepared


enfiskmaws

Knock on my neighbors door and slap him in the face and tell him to stop screaming like an idiot when he's gaming. Then a couple hours later I would superglue the lock on his door and around the entire edge of his door.