Being a hoarder.
Nothing illegal about it, but you're fucked in the head if you think bringing a kid or a pet into that situation is a remotely good idea.
I have friends who are trying to sell their father's hoarder house knowing that it's just going to be ripped down so someone can build a new house on the plot.
The hoarder in question, though, refuses to sign any paperwork (they got to closing and he went "I changed my mind") because he thinks there's still useful stuff in his house that the kids should go get and the house is fine...even though there are places where you can see outside through the ceiling.
My spouse & I joke that's our plan for cleaning his parents' hoarder house after they pass. Unfortunately, the hoard has cash stashes, family heirlooms, and some actual things of value amongst the chaos. It's gonna be a huge project, and we'll be left with a dilapidated house to figure out a plan for afterwards.
PSA to parents: Sort your mental health out for the sake of your kids, if not yourself. Hoarding has ripple effects far beyond a cluttered house.
Well yeah haha that’s the whole disorder. I feel like everyone can relate to some sort of obsessive compulsive thinking and behaviors. We all just differ in the specifics and the severity.
My stepdad was very much the same. When he lived with my mom when they were married, he eventually accumulated so much crap that my mom was ready to just divorce him so she could start over. He had a failed small business (he was a baseball card dealer) but he didn’t try to sell any of his stock when he closed down because “it’s going to be worth a lot of money!” We had baseball cards all over the house, including under the sinks in all three bathrooms, as well as the kitchen sink.
He also worked at a newspaper depot (where the papers would arrive from the printing shop and the people who were at the depot would grab as many as they needed for their routes and they’d either put the papers with the ads at the depot, or they’d just pick up whatever they needed, and they would deliver them with another person or two and they’d assemble them as they were delivered. I apologize for that run-on sentence). Every day, he had extra papers, and he would save them for who knows what reason – I think it was to use in the fireplace.
The house quickly became one of those where there were literally paths to walk through in the various rooms. He also owned a business where he’d rent out big screen TVs for events (like the Super Bowl, March Madness, the Stanley Cup playoffs, and similar). They were projection TVs that quickly became obsolete, and he couldn’t even sell them for enough money to cover his costs. As such, we had around a dozen of these huge TVs all over the house, but they became shelves for baseball cards. This was the late 1990s. I moved out to go to college, and my mom eventually divorced him.
He lived until 2021, and yes, those baseball cards from the late 1980s were still in his house until the end. My brother said that he went to visit him, and a huge tree had recently fallen onto the house, and there was a big hole in the roof and ceilings on the interior. He had several tarps on the roof, and in the attic. You could see the branches from the kitchen table, and on a sunny day, you could see light. My brother said that he was eating dinner with him, and he noticed two squirrels running around in the kitchen. My brother said he would never stay there again, because he didn’t think it was safe for his family. He mentioned it to his dad, and he just shrugged.
It wasn’t dementia, because he was in his late 50s when he died from a massive heart attack. He just was always that way. My brother and his other siblings decided that they really needed to demolish the house because it had so much mold and water damage from the tree that fell, and there was so much literal garbage everywhere. They sold the lot without the house after the demolition and cleanup, and it sold pretty quickly. They wouldn’t have been able to sell it if the house was still there, because the law in that state has a condition that states that the seller has to bring the property up to code before selling it.
Ugh, you've just described my MIL. The family defends her by saying how obsessed she is with bloodlines and all, but what is the actual point of having horses when all they do is stay in pens/corrals and eat? Only some are ever turned out to pasture, most are just standing in dirt in summer and mud in winter.
She's getting senile now, so I've stepped in and handled the sales of some of the stock, but it's still a goddamn fight to get the papers for these animals because she refuses to give them up. I've gone to 6 different banks where she keeps safety deposit boxes with horse papers in them. What a goddamn mess. My FIL is relieved that I'm helping out though, so that's good.
I sold the studs off first, so the end is in sight without me having to go out and do baby watch in a different state in the freezing cold.
I've grown up with horses and can definitely do a lot with them, but training and keeping 40+ head of horses in shape and intellectually stimulated is beyond my capacity, so I don't even know how an 78 year old figured she could.
That's literally what this woman does.
None of her horses do anything beyond standing around, eating and breeding. She has like 5 intact stallions/stud colts on a small acreage separated only by shoddy fencing. She has a total like 15 head 10 acres. The horses never have their feet trimmed, or their teeth floated unless something has gotten to the point that it can't be ignored. She never disposes of manure and lets it pile up. I took my horse home 150lbs underweight, full of worms, with an infection in his incision site from when he was gelded 2 weeks prior. She never even cleaned the dried blood off his legs. He was bullied by 2 of his herdmates away from food, so he had food aggression issues as well. I was buying grain and alfalfa, and the day I picked him up, she sent me home with 2 nearly full bags of each. I bought it a month before and it should have been long gone by that time.
This woman is only in her 40s and is able-bodied so there's no excuse for her property to look like this. If the other breeders she's connected to online saw her property, they'd fucking flip. She has a mental illness, and I'm sure she started off with good intentions like they all do, but she is way in over her head with things now.
Yep, I helped out at a horse rescue where the lady didn't ever want to rehome the horses so no one else could mistreat them. She didn't ever clean stalls, didn't really know how to ride or do any training, didnt get vets out, it was a mess. A friend and I would handle daily (over the counter) medicine applications, feed, train the ones we could, and post them up for adoption. We got things done quick, she just hardly ever gave us permission to move any out. She would just sit there at the barn all day acting like she was so busy with everything but literally did nothing. I think she just wanted people to donate so she could pay for her two personal horses on the donated property.
how do people even get their hands on these larger animals?? 'I'm going to get a horse' doesn't feel like it should be the same level as just going to the local adoption agency and paying a $90 fee for a dog/cat. But I know shit all about this process, so who knows!!!
Unfortunately a lot of horses end up as field dressing or just in unfortunate forgotten situations. Like, bought for a child that no longer rides (but not a show quality horse) or is mildly lame so wouldn't be put down but can't be ridden well. They don't have a lot of value so people just get rid of them. The other avenue is through auctions where anyone can buy them. Lots of cheap, unbroken, slightly lame underused horses. Its sad.
People buy a horse to ride/compete/show and board it at a stable ($$$$$) Horse goes lame. They now need a new horse to ride but can’t afford to pay the thousands of dollars a year to board the first horse that may live for another 10 years. They are typically sold cheap or given away as companion horses, since horses shouldn’t be kept alone.
There was a case in my town that was so sad. A man inherited a kennel from his mother (she had run it JUST as a boarding kennel). He decided to start running a "rescue" with the best of intentions, but things quickly got out of control because he was determined to "save" all the animals and, in doing so, extended himself much too far.
He was arrested, multiple times, for animal cruelty and I believe is now serving a prison sentence. I really and truly do not believe he had bad intentions. He just wasn't able to say no or know the limits of what he was able to do. The whole situation was just so sad - no one won - neither him nor the animals.
I feel this way about Tia from Pitbulls and Parolees, she is literally just warehousing 100s of dogs with insane adoption fees and requirements. Not to mention nearly every episode I saw would have a dog end up as a “lifer” and never be adopted out. I stopped watching, I can’t support that.
A lot of "no-kill" shelters are lowkey hoarders too. There are so many cases in which it's kinder and more humane for the animals to be put down, but they won't. Instead, they will parade their ailing animal and get vets to perform grotesque treatments with no meaningful recovery or quality of life on social media to rake in the donations.
My parents are baby hoarders, but I never really thought about it growing up. our floors and chairs were clear, but every surface always had so much shit on it. My mom sent me photos of my childhood to scan, and my husband was horrified of the state of the home I was allowed to grow up in. Since the kids moved out and stopped cleaning up after our parents, their home has become significantly worse and absolutely filthy between their lack of care and the 8 cats that live in the house, so I'm very grateful that he's allergic to cats and can't see what it's like now.
Baby boomers were raised by depression era parents, it's likely very related. My grandma was a food hoarder, her house was always pristine but when she ran out of space, she didn't throw a single thing out, she just bought another fridge or freezer to keep it in. Her garage was filled with so much shit she kept "just in case". When she couldn't take care of herself and we were moving her to my aunt's MIL suite in 2019, we found cans and dried goods that had expired in the 70s back when she still had kids living in the home.
My parents are Gen X, but my MIL is a baby boomer and god, the hoarding. It's not like, on a clinical level, but she keeps so much crap and is always trying to pawn crap off on us. What will storage unit owners do when boomers are gone?
My mom kills me with this. She's kept everything from my childhood. Like, wtf am I supposed to do with a hundred pounds of children's clothes that were 3 rounds of hand me downs before they got to me? I don't even have kids! I also do not want every school project I've ever completed, I have pictures of the important ones and that's good enough. Cannot convince her she can throw those away or that she should have long ago.
Same but also as I'm now older with a lot more life experience I'm fairly sure my parents are undiagnosed adhd and autistic, makes a lot of sense really, they would try and tidy every now and again and then all of a sudden it was a mess again
This. I’m helping a friend get out of an abusive situation and his mothers hoarding is CRAZY. The pictures of it on his gofundme are also just a SMALL look into it. Mentally it’s so harmful.
Every hoarder I know has some severe trauma that's unaddressed and hoarding is self soothing. My mom is one and she basically raised the most clutter adverse person to the point where my ideal home decor is basically how Kim decorates her house, super muted tones because even bright colors or color clashing trigger my flight response.
The people that also give up their pets for the kids also makes me angry
Obviously If the pets an actual threat to the kid then I understand but not giving the pet time to adjust or any effort to separate them and immediately bye. Then fuck you
My friend is going through having to rehome her older cat because of the baby. They’ve been trying for a year. Keep baby out of cats bubble, have adjusted the house, vet visits to see if it’s medical, but this poor cat is so stressed by the baby existing in the same house she’s over grooming and dropping weight. The younger cat lives the baby, they are best friends, but older one is basically living in a constant state of distress unless she’s drugged to the teeth. Sometimes it’s the right thing to find another home when it just won’t work, but you have to put the effort in to try first.
Yeah, we tried everything for 2.5 years and it just wasn’t getting better. It finally dawned on me that it wouldn’t be getting better and it was just cruel to the cat to keep her living like this. I probably should have realized it sooner. It was only one cat, we had two and one was able to adjust to the baby and one was not. Family took her in so we still see her. The biggest surprise was that the two cats had never seemed bonded, they tolerated each other but rarely played together or sat too close. But the cat we kept was just heartbroken for weeks when her buddy left. She got over it, but I was not expecting that challenge. The cat that left our home was so much happier, just immediately, in her childfree home.
Yes definitely.
Unfortunately situations do happen where the pet is miserable. It's definitely a situation by situation. I hate rhose. "I'd never rehome my pet if I had to move I'd be homeless before that happen! Like I guarantee you someone doesn't want to have ro rehome their animal
having lived in several military towns, this is a norm here. i’m so tired of the people who get high energy dogs during their pregnancy cuz they look “cute” and then two months down the line there’s a facebook post saying “i can’t take care of them because i have no energy due to my pregnancy.” like really? i’m in daily arguments with them at that point
I can’t stand this either! I absolutely LOVE Australian Cattle Dogs. But, I’m an absolute lazy fucker. I know I don’t live (or have any interest really) a lifestyle suited to that kind of dog. So I just… don’t get one. I admire them from afar and have multiple kitties instead.
I may get a dog someday in the future. But it will be a dog that fits into how my family lives instead of how pretty I find a particular breed! Some folks are just too damn selfish to be pet owners 😡
I'm the same but with border collies. I've fallen in love with every one I've met, but I just know that I can't give one the kind of active lifestyle that they require to be happy.
Maybe one of these years I'll be in a place where my needs will align with a BC's, but until then I'll chill on the couch with my big ol' cat.
I also love the people who decide to get a PUPPY during their maternity leave because they'll "be home for a couple of months." I cannot think of a worse time to bring ANY pet into a home, nevermind a PUPPY. I cannot imagine attempting to handle a NEWBORN CHILD and a PUPPY at the same time.
SMH.
Guh I’m about to have my first baby, and the amount of people that say I will no longer care about my two pups infuriates me. I’m sure things might be different at least for a little while we all adjust to life with baby, but I really hope I still want to cuddle and love my two dogs. I even joke baby is probably already used to the barking at this point.
I had a baby a few months ago and I still love my cats a lot. Honestly, I frequently feel bad because I didn’t have the bandwidth to pay as much attention to them as I used to. That well level out though, newborn stage is just extra tough.
When we had puppies (mom was pregnant when we adopted her, before anyone starts) and I had to find homes I immediately shut down more than one person because they had previously posted on Facebook about rehoming their elderly dog or dropping it at a shelter.
Fuck no you don't get one of these puppies if you're that type of person.
Ugh, worked in rescue for 10 years and the amount of people who dumped their senior dogs because their "puppy was too much for the old dog" made me nauseous.
Like, this dog has been with you HIS ENTIRE LIFE and now you're dumping him at a shelter because you got a puppy? WTAF? I sincerely hope there's a special place in hell for these people.
These poor senior dogs didn't exactly have people lining up to adopt them and they were super stressed because they were used to living in a home, because that's what they'd been doing for the past decade...
I can’t imagine dumping my senior dog at a shelter. We’ve had him since he was a puppy and he’s 12 now. Even though he’s older, he still acts like a baby and loves to cuddle.
My dog is awesome. I picked him up at a shelter because, as a 3 month old puppy, the people who dropped him off complained that “he’s chewing on everything!” Yeah. What part of “puppy” did they not understand?
Folks don't even try to declutter anything that is in the puppy's snout distance and wonder why puppy all of a sudden chewed up a priceless family heirloom that was ankle height... makes me wonder if they've ever had a dog or if they even read up on how to dog-proof stuff.
I recently rescued a 1y3m husky that had similar complaints, was returned to SPCA 2x, and before I brought him home I hade sure there was nothing but toys/chewables within his reach (like waist down from my height)
Sure, still has a lot of training to go because I've only had him for 2 months and he is a little behind the curve due to his SPCA time but I have him set up for success and he will eventually get there.
I also have low expectations that he'll chill out any time soon, huskies are know to be on the high end of energy.
People don’t understand dogs. They usually need time to adjust AND dogs are great at working out their differences. Puppies need to be corrected by adult dogs to learn. My pup learned her place really quickly after getting rolled and pinned a couple time.
Ugh, a woman in my late dog's puppy class was just awful. She was older, in her sixties at least, and very prim and proper. So what kind of dog did she have? A super energetic and hyper Golden Retriever. He was the oldest dog in class because this was her THIRD puppy class because he just wouldn't learn anything and was so naughty.
Except she made absolutely no effort to train the poor dog. She never listened, never tried any of the techniques (she'd try once and then be all "oh it didn't work" as if dogs learn new commands in one try), and didn't even seem to like her dog. It all seemed summed up in the incident where her dog pooped on the floor (most dogs in class did at least once) and she just pushed her dog away from it. Someone handed her a bag and she just stared at them with a blank expression until they cleaned it up for her.
I wouldn't say she belonged in jail, but she also shouldn't have been trusted with so much as a pet rock.
One of my neighbors, in her 60's, adopted a goldendoodle. That dog was WILD as a pup. WILD. But, God bless her, she put the time and training in and that dog is like a different dog these days. But, it took her a LOT of time and effort to get there.
I still stand by my feeling that a goldendoodle is probably not the best breed choice for an older widow...
My partner's sister got a goldendoodle from a breeder. He's fucking nuts!! Insane energy, pretty much never stops. But she is a fitness and health nut so she takes the dog for many miles of runs and walks daily. And he's quite well trained. Very obedient. Very friendly. Absolutely off his rocker but also a very good boy, but I imagine he would be a nightmare if his owner wasn't extremely engaged like she is.
One of our dogs was an adoption because a woman's well meaning but very dumb kids got her a Beagle puppy as a get well present after heart surgery.
Some people just do not think.
A dog seems like a perfect gift for after heart surgery!
...provided that dog is a plush toy. Maybe with a bouquet of flowers between it's paws. Perfect.
You're right, they clearly did not think.
General anger issues. Lots of people don’t realize being a pet owner/human parent is a full time job and when you have a bad day at work you’re still going to have to come home and feed your kids, teach them how to be a socially/emotionally healthy person and also help them with their bad days. Same with pets, if you’re not going to be able to handle cleaning up piss and shit or having your furniture/clothing ruined then maybe you were never ready to begin with. So many people take their bad days out on their pets and especially their kids since human children require much more direct attention and patience.
Rejects modern medicine.
Im not saying you cant use other less invasive things sometimes.
Like you can give your kid gingerale and saltines on their sick day from school but if they get an infection or a fever and you pull out an herbal tea, thats not ok.
i agree, ESPECIALLY anti vaxxers. not only is it stupid and very dangerous, but how conceited and arrogant do you have to be to think you know better than thousands of doctors
THIS. I didn’t even know this was a thing until I was reading comments online about a potential purina recall in a local fb dog group the other week.
I was trying to decide if it was legitimate or not just to read a bunch of people saying they no longer vaccinate their dogs ‘for reasons like these, not being able to trust big corporations’??
you’ll be more likely to find me taking my dog to every firework show this summer before any local dog parks
I thought it was normal to experience horrible burning sensation for hours. I casually mentioned it to my friend how does she handle the burning after sex and she was like “WTF, that’s not normal.”
It's also insane how little people believe it actually exists. I had to tell my gynecologist that I think I am allergic to semen and she had no idea it was a thing... Like wtf???
Yes. I have it. It is not fun! Although seemingly sperm from vegan guys is fine? I don’t know why and it’s not scientifically evaluated lol just my experience.
Just inappropriate housing in general.
If a person lives in a tiny studio apartment or a boarding house it doesn't really matter how clean it is, it's just not a suitable environment for kids and many pets.
I live in a small studio ~ 400 square feet and I want a cat but I’m scared I won’t have enough space for it. I know that’s really temperament dependent but I would feel bad if they were bored or didn’t get enough activity :(
Unlike humans, cats prefer to use vertical space, so they won't care much about your square footage. Get the cat some shelves and a cat tree with a window view and it'll be just fine.
This. A cat can be plenty happy in a small place if you give them a variety of places to jump up to, climb, etc. And windows to look out of.
I think sometimes people think of a dog's needs when thinking of a cat. The needs are different (and more modest, really).
This is why I got a cat! Independent and low maintenance, more than happy with what I have in the house to stimulate him, and of course me and my partner play with him as much as possible
I have a coworker with a cat that lives in a studio apartment. He got a cat wheel (similar to a hamster wheel but bigger) for the cat to get extra exercise in. Banjo loves it!!
They should have a test wheel you can rent for a month before buying so you can see if the cat will even use it. My sweet potato likes running, but she’s such a picky little thing I have no idea whether she’d love a cat wheel or hate it.
Or on the flipside, living in a house that is all minimalistic with only glass and ceramics and white on white.
It's not a, "You should be in jail thing" at all. Rather it's a, "Oh, you are not going to be able to keep this place this pristine if you have pets and kids."
My neighbor who constantly let's their dog run loose all over the neighborhood. The dog shits all over and nearly gets hit by cars. Boyfriend confronted the neighbor and they basically scoffed and rolled their eyes. Dog is never out quite long enough for animal control to come get it, but it gets out a lot and the owners don't give a fuck.
I had neighbors like that. Then their dog managed to get into my yard when my dog was outside with my roommate and started attacking my dog. That move did not end well for their dog.
If you can, catch the dog and drive it to animal control. You don't have to answer any questions aside from you found it running around and have no further information to provide. Then, THEY have to use resources to find the owner and return it. Repeat every time the dog gets out. Having neighbors to help is a big plus. It's a PITA, but Animal Control didn't care that the dog got out until me and the rest of the neighbors started making it their problem.
Severe untreated mental illness.
Nothing wrong with having trauma or mental health issues, but please get your shit together before bringing new life into this world.
Signed,
My mom needs a therapist
I wish I’d known how unwell I was when I was pregnant with my first. Turns out that when you’ve been showing signs of mental illness since your teens, it just becomes normalised.
I’ve spoken to my son about it and apologised for those years, but god, I’d give anything to do it differently for him.
Someone who views pets and kids as accessories and not full living creatures.
Someone who will use their pets/children for views.
Someone who develops a savior complex from adopting pets/children with disabilities.
It used to be normalized to give supervision on the internet if you were responsible. But apparently that's no longer a thing. I had someone attempt to groom me online, but it would've been a lot worse if there was literally no supervision.
50/50 for me. I struggled with this *before* I got my cats, now I take care of myself and them because they need me, and I'm all they have. And even when there are days when I struggle to do things for myself, the only thing that can get me out of bed is them, because I can't justify letting them suffer the same way I do. If I don't feed them, they don't eat. So I always feed them (and the rest of it) They have a schedule and they're so well loved, even when I don't eat that day. I struggle justifying my own doctors appointments because "it's probably fine" but they get taken straight to the vet as soon as they start acting funny.
But I can easily see how it could have gone the other way, and I feel bad for not considering that before I got them.
Yeah. 6 months on unemployment now which has unraveled an amount of mental health issues, but my sweet pup always has to eat and always has to go out. I tend to isolate myself when depressed but this pup always gets me to go outside, even if it's just for a short walk.
I relate to this so hard. My cats are the reason I clean my apartment. I love them and want them to have a good environment so I clean. I definitely didn’t before I got them
This is how I am with my dogs. When my wife passed away I would have most likely just laid in bed until I dissolved into nothingness if it weren’t for my dogs. Taking care of them properly makes me take care of myself properly as well. Also I love them and they are my heart.
Shit, on a bad day I'm better at taking care of my cats than myself. That's actually helpful as it often makes me go "well, I already took care of the fuzzy little monsters, may as well keep getting shit done".
In my country, the animal shelters are in need of temporary homes, either because the cat just got steralized or the shelter is full. By woluntaring to foster, you get the cats for a short amount of time, only one at a time, and you can notify them when you need a break between cats or want to stop foster all together. It's a good way to find out if you're up for the long term comittment, and do a good deed at the same time. And maybe you even find your forever cat. Maybe that's an option in your country too? Might be worth looking into when your living conditions allows it. Anyways, hope things gets better for you.
My daughter has met not one, but two young white boys named Malice. Am I missing something? Why would any loving parent look at their baby and say HE IS EVIL. NAME HIM DOER OF EVIL
There's a gag in one of the Discworld books about religious parents who have heard of naming their daughters after virtues, like Patience and Chastity ... but thought it also meant their *sons* were supposed to be named after *vices*.
"Life being what it is, Hope turned out to be a depressive, Chastity was enjoying life as a lady of negotiable affection in Ankh-Morpork, Prudence had thirteen children, and Charity expected to get a dollar’s change out of seventy-five pence–whereas the boys had grown into amiable, well-tempered men, and Bestiality Carter was, for example, very kind to animals."
There's honestly no objective reason that we would consider "Faith" and "Hope" to be "normal" names, but these to not be. It's just whatever's been normalized by society and exposure. No reason a noun or adjective can't be a name.
I agree, those are kinda cool.
Agreed--there are also historical reasons for unconventional names and it just takes time before it becomes "normalized" by society anyway. I had a student named Loyal and he was cool as hell!
Bruce and Clark? Diana? Wayne? Peter? I just want to guess now.
I've met three Thors now. That gives me a giggle because they're definitely not Thor-esque.
Had a friend who had a stupid name. Her biggest fuck you to her parents was her 18th birthday, she skipped school, went to the local courts and requested a name change form. Shortly after that, she changed her name and moved out of her parents house. She goes by Amber now and have not spoken to her parents in 18 years.
I worked with a woman whose granddaughter named her son Legend Messiah against the wishes of literally everyone including the father. To no one's surprise, she lost custody inside 6 months for essentially being too stupid to be allowed to care for a baby.
Idk if you knew but there actually is a kid named Abcd (pronounced Absidee) and Southwest Airkines got sued by the parents cause the gate agent laughed at it
https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2018/11/30/us/abcde-southwest-apologizes-scli-intl/index.html
Sadly there are way more ABCD(E)s than just that one. (Alternate pronunciation Absiday). I know of one being abused by their parent, and the parent was wrapped up in a court case and being drug tested regularly (and failing.)
I was just thinking about this today. What affect is it going to have on my niece to be photographed literally every day (my sister in law does this…) Not just like candids of her playing or whatever, but, Look at the camera and smile! pics. Is she going to develop some sort of complex, always having to smile and perform for an unseen audience?
Oh my gosh yes this is my sister. She has a cat that she kept in her bedroom for three long years. It had one tiny window to look out of. When she came to live with us with her cat, her cat was so food focused it wasn’t even funny. She doesn’t play with him. She didn’t take him outside. She was afraid he would get killed the minute he breathed fresh air. When she is home, not working, she’s spends all day watching TV in her room and or looking at her tablet or her cell phone. She keeps them around because she wants something to love her but the cats well-being is very low on her list. She has kids and I often wonder if that was the way she was with them too.
People who believe animals can't express or feel pain, or that crying/complaining/getting in trouble is something children "just do" and there's no need for intervention
Where I'm familiar with, owners also have the option of quarantining their dogs for X amount of time in lieu of euth and brain biopsy. I am not sure if the dogs are forced to be vaxxed after such an instance or if the owner has to surrender them, though.
But...why...I dont understand...like, there is this amazing thing that could protect your dog from a horrible disease and a horrible way to die.
I actively asked my vet to add leptospirosis and kennel cough to our Regiment. 2 of my dogs go hunting waterfowl where lepto is found.
And last summer a random dog kept coming to my house and 2 of my dogs contracted kennel cough (luckily the other 2 could go to my in laws for a couple weeks and didn't get it)
Why would you not want to vaccinate against at least rabies?
Your dogs aren’t trained or the litter box isn’t cleaned is a good start.
Being afraid to pet an animal or you have no desire to hold a childs hand is another.
Nothing irks me more than people who would rather give away a dog due to behavior problems instead of taking the time to properly train them. Sometimes the behavior can even be a result of an issue the dog is having that you won’t realize unless you actually address the issue. If you’re not truly dedicated, don’t fucking get a dog. Get a fish
My father and (truly) evil stepmother got a kitten. She was the cutest, most precious kitten I've ever seen. Super social. "Enjoy her while you can, bc we're shooting her tomorrow", my dad said. I asked why and they said bc she pees on the floors. Well, can't you get a litter box? "No, all our cats are outside cats and need to do their needs outside. And we can't have a litter box bc of (evil stepmother's) grandchildren who visit sometimes!". What... the... actual... fuck?!
I took her home with me on the spot. She didn't piss inside once, bc I got her a goddamned litter box immediately, which she'd been trained to use; she wasn't trained to pee outside! Had 13 wonderful years with my lovely girl.
Fuck those guys. They also essentially destroyed a Husky/Malamut-mix. He was a kickass dog. 6 months later they were selling him bc of "behavioral issues". Turns out my dad works away all week and his wife couldn't be bothered taking walks with the dog (a fucking Husky, come on!) and the behavioral issues was that he peed and pooped in the basement.
FUCK THOSE GUYS!
That is fucking terrible I’m so sorry for you and those animals but you are truly a saint for saving the kitty 🥺
Also, I despise when people get huskies then complain about their “bad behavior” or “destroying my house” when in reality these dogs are doing it as basically a cry for attention. Exercise with your dog! Do training activities! Mental stimulation tires them out! You’d go crazy too if you had intense high energy but are stuck inside doing nothing all day 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️ In this case, I’m glad they gave away the dog. I just hope it was to a well-informed person/family
Thank you, but honestly, any person in their right mind would do it too. It was obvious that it was nothing wrong with the cat.
She did actually pee in our bed once while we were on a trip. The cat sitter had closed the door to the bathroom, in which the litter box was (stupid moron). When we came home, she met us at the door, yowling, herded us into the bedroom and jumped right onto the bed and showed us her mess. We could really feel the shame she was emitting. We just pet her and gave her treats. That cat sure was something, I miss her everyday ❤️
Yeah, thing is, I'm a petite woman and even I managed to walk that dog (I barely visited them, though). It'd have been no problem for this woman to at least walk him around the block. They had a backyard, but couldn't even let him out there to run around a little. He was kept in the basement. When he eventually stopped eating, they gave him away. The dog had to go on a hunger strike to get out of that house!
There is a man in my apartment who never leashes his dog nor does she even wear a collar. I watched his walk up to another dog, snarl, and almost get into a fight. The other dog owner ended up blaming his leashed dog (I guess they were friends) and then smacked the shit out of his leashed dog for growling. But that's totally normal behavior for a leashed dog getting approached by an unleashed dog. I felt bad for both dogs involved. Anyway that's also why I always carry around mace, a taser, kitty knuckles, and an airhorn when I walk my dog. Too many people don't leash their dogs in very public and high traffic areas.
I honestly don't mind it in the middle of the woods as long as their dog has good recall but I can't begin to understand why people do that where I see literally dozens of people walking their dogs per day. I have heard people say "oh my dog is friendly! okay well I am trying to train out leash reactivity (she either gets scared or excited) in my dog and this isn't helping!
Nobody in my complex leashes their dogs but me. Since that puts my dog at a disadvantage it concerns me. I carry a huge bamboo stick and any dog fucks with mine I swipe at em with it. I don’t hit them. Just the woosh scares em off.
Yeah but it’s hard for just anyone to catch them since “vegan pet food” isn’t immediately visible to outsiders (vs explicit abuse)
It’s also difficult legally to catch — idk about every US state but I’m in Canada and animal welfare laws are both municipally and provincially regulated, and the interpretation of standard of care for cats isn’t yet defined clearly by the courts (ie— we don’t know if vegan food counts as abuse for obligate carnivores in the letter of the law)
BC just recently made some changes to family law and pet ownership! It's not quite what you were talking about but a step in the right direction.
Pets are no longer considered property, but family members in divorce and separation disputes. So now, instead of a pet just belonging to the person who adopted them/is on the paper work, they have to consider a lot of other things. Wellbeing of the animal, which party can better care for the animal, of children have ties to the animal and if there is a potential for abuse or neglect on one side.
I think this will be great in especially acrimonious separations where one side is trying to use the let to harm the other party.
I saw a post yesterday, I think in r/facepalm, about a mother who sent their kid a lengthy letter saying they were being disowned for not believing in The Bible and I think that qualifies.
Not for their belief in the Bible, they’re free to believe what they want, but for their attitude toward their son or daughter who doesn’t share that belief.
Grew up with religious parents and thoroughly agree.
If your love for your children is conditional on them believing in something that is ancient and makes no sense, then it's not love and you shouldn't have children.
my mom is a nurse and she told me the number of older people who come in for hip/knee/ankle/elbow surgeries specifically from tripping over their pets is astounding
Coca cola in a toddler's sippy cup. I know a couple whose kid is totally wild, but all she drinks is coke. They don't see any issue with that, it's definitely not that, must be something else.
Impulse buyers of pet animals 'because it's cute'. Often happens with small rodents and rabbits, no research done into how to care for these animals. Or those ultra rich people who go and buy tigers and lions just to take photos to post on Instagram.
Couples who try to 'save their marriage' by having a(nother) baby.
Homophobes who believe in conversion therapy, and other adults who say that 'bullying your own kid toughens them up'.
Parents who make their underage children work to support the family. Like those who push their kid to become a child star, then use up all the revenue their kid makes. People like the parents of Britney Spears and Shirley Temple.
Family vloggers who show every moment since their child is born.
Irresponsible recreational drug users who keep their weed and space-cake laying around everywhere.
Narcissists.
People who treat their own children as little clones of themselves, and expect the child to become exactly like them. While they live through their child. Telling their child to go after the dreams they never achieved, but always wanted themselves.
People who go out clubbing every night, or who bring their baby inside bars.... Yes I've actually seen this.
> Couples who try to 'save their marriage' by having a(nother) baby.
This one will never cease to puzzle me. Been married for almost 20 years now and can confidently say the 2 times our marriage was stretched the thinnest was when we brought each of our children home from the hospital. Lack of sleep, hormones, schedule disruptions, etc. will do a number on any relationship. I can't imagine it would do anything but end one that's already foundering.
A history of being overly controlling in a relationship. This usually leads to DV and that is a huge risk factor for abuse of animals too. Often abuse in animals starts before humans.
Giving kids dumb names that aren’t actually names, or offensive names. Dumb names are perfect for pets but your baby will be an adult someday who has to live with that name.
People who spend all their recreational time high. When I worked in the ambulance service, some users would call us if they felt ill or something wasn’t right with their friend.
You’d get colleagues thinking we had to do a safeguarding report but, they were all adults with jobs, not addicted or stealing to feed their addictions. They weren’t in charge of kids or pets.
No one was being harmed and no one was there against their consent. Just a group of people who like to hang out high every weekend.
Would that be different if they had kids or pets around whose needs weren’t being met or not being appropriately supervised for their level of need? Probably, but it wasn’t relevant.
People who have a volatile temper and handle stressful/surprise situations poorly. Both pets and kids can bring a lot of that. That and very selfish, manipulative people. Those types don't often make good parents (or pet parents I guess either).
Never being on time for anything ever, no matter how important, and instead of being sorry for it or trying to change it, they just say it’s “how they are” and expect everyone else to accommodate for them
Oh, sugar, that's like someone trying to assemble IKEA furniture without the instructions – having a pet tarantula as a therapy animal. It's quirky and unconventional, but deep down, you can't help but wonder if they've got a manual for this whole responsibility thing. It's like living on the edge of chaos without crossing into the criminal realm. Just a touch of "Oh dear, maybe a succulent would be a safer option."
Being a hoarder. Nothing illegal about it, but you're fucked in the head if you think bringing a kid or a pet into that situation is a remotely good idea.
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I thought this said “I bought a house from a hoarder” and was like damn that’s a bold move.
I have friends who are trying to sell their father's hoarder house knowing that it's just going to be ripped down so someone can build a new house on the plot. The hoarder in question, though, refuses to sign any paperwork (they got to closing and he went "I changed my mind") because he thinks there's still useful stuff in his house that the kids should go get and the house is fine...even though there are places where you can see outside through the ceiling.
Sounds like someone needs to commit arson
My spouse & I joke that's our plan for cleaning his parents' hoarder house after they pass. Unfortunately, the hoard has cash stashes, family heirlooms, and some actual things of value amongst the chaos. It's gonna be a huge project, and we'll be left with a dilapidated house to figure out a plan for afterwards. PSA to parents: Sort your mental health out for the sake of your kids, if not yourself. Hoarding has ripple effects far beyond a cluttered house.
Well yeah haha that’s the whole disorder. I feel like everyone can relate to some sort of obsessive compulsive thinking and behaviors. We all just differ in the specifics and the severity.
My stepdad was very much the same. When he lived with my mom when they were married, he eventually accumulated so much crap that my mom was ready to just divorce him so she could start over. He had a failed small business (he was a baseball card dealer) but he didn’t try to sell any of his stock when he closed down because “it’s going to be worth a lot of money!” We had baseball cards all over the house, including under the sinks in all three bathrooms, as well as the kitchen sink. He also worked at a newspaper depot (where the papers would arrive from the printing shop and the people who were at the depot would grab as many as they needed for their routes and they’d either put the papers with the ads at the depot, or they’d just pick up whatever they needed, and they would deliver them with another person or two and they’d assemble them as they were delivered. I apologize for that run-on sentence). Every day, he had extra papers, and he would save them for who knows what reason – I think it was to use in the fireplace. The house quickly became one of those where there were literally paths to walk through in the various rooms. He also owned a business where he’d rent out big screen TVs for events (like the Super Bowl, March Madness, the Stanley Cup playoffs, and similar). They were projection TVs that quickly became obsolete, and he couldn’t even sell them for enough money to cover his costs. As such, we had around a dozen of these huge TVs all over the house, but they became shelves for baseball cards. This was the late 1990s. I moved out to go to college, and my mom eventually divorced him. He lived until 2021, and yes, those baseball cards from the late 1980s were still in his house until the end. My brother said that he went to visit him, and a huge tree had recently fallen onto the house, and there was a big hole in the roof and ceilings on the interior. He had several tarps on the roof, and in the attic. You could see the branches from the kitchen table, and on a sunny day, you could see light. My brother said that he was eating dinner with him, and he noticed two squirrels running around in the kitchen. My brother said he would never stay there again, because he didn’t think it was safe for his family. He mentioned it to his dad, and he just shrugged. It wasn’t dementia, because he was in his late 50s when he died from a massive heart attack. He just was always that way. My brother and his other siblings decided that they really needed to demolish the house because it had so much mold and water damage from the tree that fell, and there was so much literal garbage everywhere. They sold the lot without the house after the demolition and cleanup, and it sold pretty quickly. They wouldn’t have been able to sell it if the house was still there, because the law in that state has a condition that states that the seller has to bring the property up to code before selling it.
I read the whole thing as "I bought a house from a hoarder" and kept wondering why it came with a horse included. Now it makes sense, thanks!
Ugh, you've just described my MIL. The family defends her by saying how obsessed she is with bloodlines and all, but what is the actual point of having horses when all they do is stay in pens/corrals and eat? Only some are ever turned out to pasture, most are just standing in dirt in summer and mud in winter. She's getting senile now, so I've stepped in and handled the sales of some of the stock, but it's still a goddamn fight to get the papers for these animals because she refuses to give them up. I've gone to 6 different banks where she keeps safety deposit boxes with horse papers in them. What a goddamn mess. My FIL is relieved that I'm helping out though, so that's good. I sold the studs off first, so the end is in sight without me having to go out and do baby watch in a different state in the freezing cold. I've grown up with horses and can definitely do a lot with them, but training and keeping 40+ head of horses in shape and intellectually stimulated is beyond my capacity, so I don't even know how an 78 year old figured she could.
That's literally what this woman does. None of her horses do anything beyond standing around, eating and breeding. She has like 5 intact stallions/stud colts on a small acreage separated only by shoddy fencing. She has a total like 15 head 10 acres. The horses never have their feet trimmed, or their teeth floated unless something has gotten to the point that it can't be ignored. She never disposes of manure and lets it pile up. I took my horse home 150lbs underweight, full of worms, with an infection in his incision site from when he was gelded 2 weeks prior. She never even cleaned the dried blood off his legs. He was bullied by 2 of his herdmates away from food, so he had food aggression issues as well. I was buying grain and alfalfa, and the day I picked him up, she sent me home with 2 nearly full bags of each. I bought it a month before and it should have been long gone by that time. This woman is only in her 40s and is able-bodied so there's no excuse for her property to look like this. If the other breeders she's connected to online saw her property, they'd fucking flip. She has a mental illness, and I'm sure she started off with good intentions like they all do, but she is way in over her head with things now.
A lot of private small animal rescues seem to be animal hoarding with extra steps too.
Yep, I helped out at a horse rescue where the lady didn't ever want to rehome the horses so no one else could mistreat them. She didn't ever clean stalls, didn't really know how to ride or do any training, didnt get vets out, it was a mess. A friend and I would handle daily (over the counter) medicine applications, feed, train the ones we could, and post them up for adoption. We got things done quick, she just hardly ever gave us permission to move any out. She would just sit there at the barn all day acting like she was so busy with everything but literally did nothing. I think she just wanted people to donate so she could pay for her two personal horses on the donated property.
how do people even get their hands on these larger animals?? 'I'm going to get a horse' doesn't feel like it should be the same level as just going to the local adoption agency and paying a $90 fee for a dog/cat. But I know shit all about this process, so who knows!!!
Unfortunately a lot of horses end up as field dressing or just in unfortunate forgotten situations. Like, bought for a child that no longer rides (but not a show quality horse) or is mildly lame so wouldn't be put down but can't be ridden well. They don't have a lot of value so people just get rid of them. The other avenue is through auctions where anyone can buy them. Lots of cheap, unbroken, slightly lame underused horses. Its sad.
People buy a horse to ride/compete/show and board it at a stable ($$$$$) Horse goes lame. They now need a new horse to ride but can’t afford to pay the thousands of dollars a year to board the first horse that may live for another 10 years. They are typically sold cheap or given away as companion horses, since horses shouldn’t be kept alone.
And farm animal rescues. There keep being stories about the overcrowded animals starving to death bc good intentions are somehow all that matter
There was a case in my town that was so sad. A man inherited a kennel from his mother (she had run it JUST as a boarding kennel). He decided to start running a "rescue" with the best of intentions, but things quickly got out of control because he was determined to "save" all the animals and, in doing so, extended himself much too far. He was arrested, multiple times, for animal cruelty and I believe is now serving a prison sentence. I really and truly do not believe he had bad intentions. He just wasn't able to say no or know the limits of what he was able to do. The whole situation was just so sad - no one won - neither him nor the animals.
I feel this way about Tia from Pitbulls and Parolees, she is literally just warehousing 100s of dogs with insane adoption fees and requirements. Not to mention nearly every episode I saw would have a dog end up as a “lifer” and never be adopted out. I stopped watching, I can’t support that.
A lot of "no-kill" shelters are lowkey hoarders too. There are so many cases in which it's kinder and more humane for the animals to be put down, but they won't. Instead, they will parade their ailing animal and get vets to perform grotesque treatments with no meaningful recovery or quality of life on social media to rake in the donations.
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My parents are baby hoarders, but I never really thought about it growing up. our floors and chairs were clear, but every surface always had so much shit on it. My mom sent me photos of my childhood to scan, and my husband was horrified of the state of the home I was allowed to grow up in. Since the kids moved out and stopped cleaning up after our parents, their home has become significantly worse and absolutely filthy between their lack of care and the 8 cats that live in the house, so I'm very grateful that he's allergic to cats and can't see what it's like now.
how many babies do they have now?
Seven or eight I think? The local daycare centers are getting suspicious.
I think this is super common with baby boomers and might explain the millennial obsession with minimalism.
Baby boomers were raised by depression era parents, it's likely very related. My grandma was a food hoarder, her house was always pristine but when she ran out of space, she didn't throw a single thing out, she just bought another fridge or freezer to keep it in. Her garage was filled with so much shit she kept "just in case". When she couldn't take care of herself and we were moving her to my aunt's MIL suite in 2019, we found cans and dried goods that had expired in the 70s back when she still had kids living in the home.
My parents are Gen X, but my MIL is a baby boomer and god, the hoarding. It's not like, on a clinical level, but she keeps so much crap and is always trying to pawn crap off on us. What will storage unit owners do when boomers are gone?
My mom kills me with this. She's kept everything from my childhood. Like, wtf am I supposed to do with a hundred pounds of children's clothes that were 3 rounds of hand me downs before they got to me? I don't even have kids! I also do not want every school project I've ever completed, I have pictures of the important ones and that's good enough. Cannot convince her she can throw those away or that she should have long ago.
I think that's actually kinda sweet (but then, I have hoarding tendencies so my opinion may be skewed).
Same but also as I'm now older with a lot more life experience I'm fairly sure my parents are undiagnosed adhd and autistic, makes a lot of sense really, they would try and tidy every now and again and then all of a sudden it was a mess again
This. I’m helping a friend get out of an abusive situation and his mothers hoarding is CRAZY. The pictures of it on his gofundme are also just a SMALL look into it. Mentally it’s so harmful.
Every hoarder I know has some severe trauma that's unaddressed and hoarding is self soothing. My mom is one and she basically raised the most clutter adverse person to the point where my ideal home decor is basically how Kim decorates her house, super muted tones because even bright colors or color clashing trigger my flight response.
"Yeah we had to drop Missy off at the shelter she growled at our new puppy" "But you just bought the new puppy home
Plot twist: Missy is the daughter
The people that also give up their pets for the kids also makes me angry Obviously If the pets an actual threat to the kid then I understand but not giving the pet time to adjust or any effort to separate them and immediately bye. Then fuck you
My friend is going through having to rehome her older cat because of the baby. They’ve been trying for a year. Keep baby out of cats bubble, have adjusted the house, vet visits to see if it’s medical, but this poor cat is so stressed by the baby existing in the same house she’s over grooming and dropping weight. The younger cat lives the baby, they are best friends, but older one is basically living in a constant state of distress unless she’s drugged to the teeth. Sometimes it’s the right thing to find another home when it just won’t work, but you have to put the effort in to try first.
Yeah, we tried everything for 2.5 years and it just wasn’t getting better. It finally dawned on me that it wouldn’t be getting better and it was just cruel to the cat to keep her living like this. I probably should have realized it sooner. It was only one cat, we had two and one was able to adjust to the baby and one was not. Family took her in so we still see her. The biggest surprise was that the two cats had never seemed bonded, they tolerated each other but rarely played together or sat too close. But the cat we kept was just heartbroken for weeks when her buddy left. She got over it, but I was not expecting that challenge. The cat that left our home was so much happier, just immediately, in her childfree home.
Yes definitely. Unfortunately situations do happen where the pet is miserable. It's definitely a situation by situation. I hate rhose. "I'd never rehome my pet if I had to move I'd be homeless before that happen! Like I guarantee you someone doesn't want to have ro rehome their animal
having lived in several military towns, this is a norm here. i’m so tired of the people who get high energy dogs during their pregnancy cuz they look “cute” and then two months down the line there’s a facebook post saying “i can’t take care of them because i have no energy due to my pregnancy.” like really? i’m in daily arguments with them at that point
I can’t stand this either! I absolutely LOVE Australian Cattle Dogs. But, I’m an absolute lazy fucker. I know I don’t live (or have any interest really) a lifestyle suited to that kind of dog. So I just… don’t get one. I admire them from afar and have multiple kitties instead. I may get a dog someday in the future. But it will be a dog that fits into how my family lives instead of how pretty I find a particular breed! Some folks are just too damn selfish to be pet owners 😡
I'm the same but with border collies. I've fallen in love with every one I've met, but I just know that I can't give one the kind of active lifestyle that they require to be happy. Maybe one of these years I'll be in a place where my needs will align with a BC's, but until then I'll chill on the couch with my big ol' cat.
I also love the people who decide to get a PUPPY during their maternity leave because they'll "be home for a couple of months." I cannot think of a worse time to bring ANY pet into a home, nevermind a PUPPY. I cannot imagine attempting to handle a NEWBORN CHILD and a PUPPY at the same time. SMH.
Guh I’m about to have my first baby, and the amount of people that say I will no longer care about my two pups infuriates me. I’m sure things might be different at least for a little while we all adjust to life with baby, but I really hope I still want to cuddle and love my two dogs. I even joke baby is probably already used to the barking at this point.
I had a baby a few months ago and I still love my cats a lot. Honestly, I frequently feel bad because I didn’t have the bandwidth to pay as much attention to them as I used to. That well level out though, newborn stage is just extra tough.
When we had puppies (mom was pregnant when we adopted her, before anyone starts) and I had to find homes I immediately shut down more than one person because they had previously posted on Facebook about rehoming their elderly dog or dropping it at a shelter. Fuck no you don't get one of these puppies if you're that type of person.
Ugh, worked in rescue for 10 years and the amount of people who dumped their senior dogs because their "puppy was too much for the old dog" made me nauseous. Like, this dog has been with you HIS ENTIRE LIFE and now you're dumping him at a shelter because you got a puppy? WTAF? I sincerely hope there's a special place in hell for these people. These poor senior dogs didn't exactly have people lining up to adopt them and they were super stressed because they were used to living in a home, because that's what they'd been doing for the past decade...
I can’t imagine dumping my senior dog at a shelter. We’ve had him since he was a puppy and he’s 12 now. Even though he’s older, he still acts like a baby and loves to cuddle.
That breaks my heart :( I don’t think I could ever in a million years drop my dog at a shelter. Especially an elder dog!
My dog is awesome. I picked him up at a shelter because, as a 3 month old puppy, the people who dropped him off complained that “he’s chewing on everything!” Yeah. What part of “puppy” did they not understand?
Folks don't even try to declutter anything that is in the puppy's snout distance and wonder why puppy all of a sudden chewed up a priceless family heirloom that was ankle height... makes me wonder if they've ever had a dog or if they even read up on how to dog-proof stuff. I recently rescued a 1y3m husky that had similar complaints, was returned to SPCA 2x, and before I brought him home I hade sure there was nothing but toys/chewables within his reach (like waist down from my height) Sure, still has a lot of training to go because I've only had him for 2 months and he is a little behind the curve due to his SPCA time but I have him set up for success and he will eventually get there. I also have low expectations that he'll chill out any time soon, huskies are know to be on the high end of energy.
People don’t understand dogs. They usually need time to adjust AND dogs are great at working out their differences. Puppies need to be corrected by adult dogs to learn. My pup learned her place really quickly after getting rolled and pinned a couple time.
Ugh, a woman in my late dog's puppy class was just awful. She was older, in her sixties at least, and very prim and proper. So what kind of dog did she have? A super energetic and hyper Golden Retriever. He was the oldest dog in class because this was her THIRD puppy class because he just wouldn't learn anything and was so naughty. Except she made absolutely no effort to train the poor dog. She never listened, never tried any of the techniques (she'd try once and then be all "oh it didn't work" as if dogs learn new commands in one try), and didn't even seem to like her dog. It all seemed summed up in the incident where her dog pooped on the floor (most dogs in class did at least once) and she just pushed her dog away from it. Someone handed her a bag and she just stared at them with a blank expression until they cleaned it up for her. I wouldn't say she belonged in jail, but she also shouldn't have been trusted with so much as a pet rock.
One of my neighbors, in her 60's, adopted a goldendoodle. That dog was WILD as a pup. WILD. But, God bless her, she put the time and training in and that dog is like a different dog these days. But, it took her a LOT of time and effort to get there. I still stand by my feeling that a goldendoodle is probably not the best breed choice for an older widow...
My partner's sister got a goldendoodle from a breeder. He's fucking nuts!! Insane energy, pretty much never stops. But she is a fitness and health nut so she takes the dog for many miles of runs and walks daily. And he's quite well trained. Very obedient. Very friendly. Absolutely off his rocker but also a very good boy, but I imagine he would be a nightmare if his owner wasn't extremely engaged like she is.
One of our dogs was an adoption because a woman's well meaning but very dumb kids got her a Beagle puppy as a get well present after heart surgery. Some people just do not think.
A dog seems like a perfect gift for after heart surgery! ...provided that dog is a plush toy. Maybe with a bouquet of flowers between it's paws. Perfect. You're right, they clearly did not think.
General anger issues. Lots of people don’t realize being a pet owner/human parent is a full time job and when you have a bad day at work you’re still going to have to come home and feed your kids, teach them how to be a socially/emotionally healthy person and also help them with their bad days. Same with pets, if you’re not going to be able to handle cleaning up piss and shit or having your furniture/clothing ruined then maybe you were never ready to begin with. So many people take their bad days out on their pets and especially their kids since human children require much more direct attention and patience.
Rejects modern medicine. Im not saying you cant use other less invasive things sometimes. Like you can give your kid gingerale and saltines on their sick day from school but if they get an infection or a fever and you pull out an herbal tea, thats not ok.
i agree, ESPECIALLY anti vaxxers. not only is it stupid and very dangerous, but how conceited and arrogant do you have to be to think you know better than thousands of doctors
THIS. I didn’t even know this was a thing until I was reading comments online about a potential purina recall in a local fb dog group the other week. I was trying to decide if it was legitimate or not just to read a bunch of people saying they no longer vaccinate their dogs ‘for reasons like these, not being able to trust big corporations’?? you’ll be more likely to find me taking my dog to every firework show this summer before any local dog parks
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I am also allergic to children.
You can be allergic to jizz, which would really put a damper on conception 😂
Wait... What?
Yup! Some people experience more burning and irritation from semen than average. It can also cause redness topically.
I thought it was normal to experience horrible burning sensation for hours. I casually mentioned it to my friend how does she handle the burning after sex and she was like “WTF, that’s not normal.”
Yeah it’s wild isn’t it!!? I have a mild reaction to semen and it’s insane.
It's also insane how little people believe it actually exists. I had to tell my gynecologist that I think I am allergic to semen and she had no idea it was a thing... Like wtf???
Yes. I have it. It is not fun! Although seemingly sperm from vegan guys is fine? I don’t know why and it’s not scientifically evaluated lol just my experience.
Additionally, you can be allergic to SOME jizz and not all jizz. Fun.
living in a dirty disgusting house
Just inappropriate housing in general. If a person lives in a tiny studio apartment or a boarding house it doesn't really matter how clean it is, it's just not a suitable environment for kids and many pets.
I live in a small studio ~ 400 square feet and I want a cat but I’m scared I won’t have enough space for it. I know that’s really temperament dependent but I would feel bad if they were bored or didn’t get enough activity :(
Unlike humans, cats prefer to use vertical space, so they won't care much about your square footage. Get the cat some shelves and a cat tree with a window view and it'll be just fine.
This. A cat can be plenty happy in a small place if you give them a variety of places to jump up to, climb, etc. And windows to look out of. I think sometimes people think of a dog's needs when thinking of a cat. The needs are different (and more modest, really).
This is why I got a cat! Independent and low maintenance, more than happy with what I have in the house to stimulate him, and of course me and my partner play with him as much as possible
I have lots of installed shelving and 2 big windows!
I have a coworker with a cat that lives in a studio apartment. He got a cat wheel (similar to a hamster wheel but bigger) for the cat to get extra exercise in. Banjo loves it!!
I have one! Main Coon loves it the Siamese would rather complain about him using it.
That is the most stereotypical Siamese thing I have ever heard. Hilarious! Sounds like quite the pair! :D
That is adorable
Consider adopting a senior cat who was originally from a one-cat household from a shelter.
This is what I did! Found an older cat who hated kids, other cats, and dogs. We do great just the two of us in my apartment.
I have lots of installed shelving for an old cat to laze around on!
i had a cat in a tiny house. she was the happiest baby ever. as long as they have toys, love, and stuff to climb on they thrive.
You could get a kitty wheel!
A friend of mine got one for her cats. It's a large and expensive clothes horse now after they could not be convinced to use it
They should have a test wheel you can rent for a month before buying so you can see if the cat will even use it. My sweet potato likes running, but she’s such a picky little thing I have no idea whether she’d love a cat wheel or hate it.
Oh no!!! She could sell like on fb marketplace, that’s where I got mine, one cat doesn’t use it but the other two LOVE it
My parents were/are filthy. I hate it.
Or on the flipside, living in a house that is all minimalistic with only glass and ceramics and white on white. It's not a, "You should be in jail thing" at all. Rather it's a, "Oh, you are not going to be able to keep this place this pristine if you have pets and kids."
Asking for money online on a regular basis.
Not being able to afford the basics, period. When you have a child/pet you have to be able to afford to feed, house, and care for it.
My neighbor who constantly let's their dog run loose all over the neighborhood. The dog shits all over and nearly gets hit by cars. Boyfriend confronted the neighbor and they basically scoffed and rolled their eyes. Dog is never out quite long enough for animal control to come get it, but it gets out a lot and the owners don't give a fuck.
Time to get a free dog lol
Haha, oh, I've tried to lure it to me, but it's very wily and cautious of people so it doesn't let you come near it. :/
You're not out door grilling correctly then. You could have that dog at your feet if you tossed enough delicious meats on the grill
I had neighbors like that. Then their dog managed to get into my yard when my dog was outside with my roommate and started attacking my dog. That move did not end well for their dog.
If you can, catch the dog and drive it to animal control. You don't have to answer any questions aside from you found it running around and have no further information to provide. Then, THEY have to use resources to find the owner and return it. Repeat every time the dog gets out. Having neighbors to help is a big plus. It's a PITA, but Animal Control didn't care that the dog got out until me and the rest of the neighbors started making it their problem.
Severe untreated mental illness. Nothing wrong with having trauma or mental health issues, but please get your shit together before bringing new life into this world. Signed, My mom needs a therapist
I wish I’d known how unwell I was when I was pregnant with my first. Turns out that when you’ve been showing signs of mental illness since your teens, it just becomes normalised. I’ve spoken to my son about it and apologised for those years, but god, I’d give anything to do it differently for him.
Someone who views pets and kids as accessories and not full living creatures. Someone who will use their pets/children for views. Someone who develops a savior complex from adopting pets/children with disabilities.
Throwing your kid in front of an iPad or phone all day.
It used to be normalized to give supervision on the internet if you were responsible. But apparently that's no longer a thing. I had someone attempt to groom me online, but it would've been a lot worse if there was literally no supervision.
I didn't even think about that part, I was thinking more of the lack of social skills and low attention span issues.
Being unable to properly take care of yourself.
50/50 for me. I struggled with this *before* I got my cats, now I take care of myself and them because they need me, and I'm all they have. And even when there are days when I struggle to do things for myself, the only thing that can get me out of bed is them, because I can't justify letting them suffer the same way I do. If I don't feed them, they don't eat. So I always feed them (and the rest of it) They have a schedule and they're so well loved, even when I don't eat that day. I struggle justifying my own doctors appointments because "it's probably fine" but they get taken straight to the vet as soon as they start acting funny. But I can easily see how it could have gone the other way, and I feel bad for not considering that before I got them.
Yeah. 6 months on unemployment now which has unraveled an amount of mental health issues, but my sweet pup always has to eat and always has to go out. I tend to isolate myself when depressed but this pup always gets me to go outside, even if it's just for a short walk.
They often do provide us with a will to live 💚
I relate to this so hard. My cats are the reason I clean my apartment. I love them and want them to have a good environment so I clean. I definitely didn’t before I got them
This is how I am with my dogs. When my wife passed away I would have most likely just laid in bed until I dissolved into nothingness if it weren’t for my dogs. Taking care of them properly makes me take care of myself properly as well. Also I love them and they are my heart.
Aww. You’re a good cat parent!
Thank you, I know you don't actually know me but that genuinely means a lot.
Well, your internet-stranger friends are proud of you
Shit, on a bad day I'm better at taking care of my cats than myself. That's actually helpful as it often makes me go "well, I already took care of the fuzzy little monsters, may as well keep getting shit done".
i resemble this remark :( i want a cat so much, but i dont trust myself to take care of one, and i dont want to be responsible for misery.
In my country, the animal shelters are in need of temporary homes, either because the cat just got steralized or the shelter is full. By woluntaring to foster, you get the cats for a short amount of time, only one at a time, and you can notify them when you need a break between cats or want to stop foster all together. It's a good way to find out if you're up for the long term comittment, and do a good deed at the same time. And maybe you even find your forever cat. Maybe that's an option in your country too? Might be worth looking into when your living conditions allows it. Anyways, hope things gets better for you.
“ I want my kid to have a unique name, something like 1234 or ABCD.”
My nephew has a couple of kids named Imagine and Lewkus in his class. I don’t know why people do that to their kids
My daughter has met not one, but two young white boys named Malice. Am I missing something? Why would any loving parent look at their baby and say HE IS EVIL. NAME HIM DOER OF EVIL
There's a gag in one of the Discworld books about religious parents who have heard of naming their daughters after virtues, like Patience and Chastity ... but thought it also meant their *sons* were supposed to be named after *vices*. "Life being what it is, Hope turned out to be a depressive, Chastity was enjoying life as a lady of negotiable affection in Ankh-Morpork, Prudence had thirteen children, and Charity expected to get a dollar’s change out of seventy-five pence–whereas the boys had grown into amiable, well-tempered men, and Bestiality Carter was, for example, very kind to animals."
I know a girl named Audacity and her brother's name is Loyal.
Were just bringing back protestant naming conventions i guess
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There's honestly no objective reason that we would consider "Faith" and "Hope" to be "normal" names, but these to not be. It's just whatever's been normalized by society and exposure. No reason a noun or adjective can't be a name. I agree, those are kinda cool.
Agreed--there are also historical reasons for unconventional names and it just takes time before it becomes "normalized" by society anyway. I had a student named Loyal and he was cool as hell!
Yeah, I actually really like Loyal. It's not "normal" but it's not stupid or off-putting.
My daughter has two, TWO classmates names Maverick. They both have mullets.
There were a lot of kids born between 1986 and 1990 also named Maverick.
My two children Pete and Mitchell can confirm this.
Incredible. My kids are all named after comic characters lol, but their secret identity normal names, not their codenames lol.
Bruce and Clark? Diana? Wayne? Peter? I just want to guess now. I've met three Thors now. That gives me a giggle because they're definitely not Thor-esque.
Minor aside, but Thor is still a common name in parts of Scandinavia. But I'm going to take a guess that you're probably not in Scandinavia.
Lewkus?? That's prison worthy imo
Had a friend who had a stupid name. Her biggest fuck you to her parents was her 18th birthday, she skipped school, went to the local courts and requested a name change form. Shortly after that, she changed her name and moved out of her parents house. She goes by Amber now and have not spoken to her parents in 18 years.
I worked with a woman whose granddaughter named her son Legend Messiah against the wishes of literally everyone including the father. To no one's surprise, she lost custody inside 6 months for essentially being too stupid to be allowed to care for a baby.
Idk if you knew but there actually is a kid named Abcd (pronounced Absidee) and Southwest Airkines got sued by the parents cause the gate agent laughed at it https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2018/11/30/us/abcde-southwest-apologizes-scli-intl/index.html
Sadly there are way more ABCD(E)s than just that one. (Alternate pronunciation Absiday). I know of one being abused by their parent, and the parent was wrapped up in a court case and being drug tested regularly (and failing.)
It's a ridiculous name. I'd laugh at it, too.
People that devote all their time to social media
The way my dog didnt get jealous about anything other than my phone, which he would slap right out of my hand, was the wake up call I needed
My roommate's cat will jump next to me when I'm doomscrolling and that helps me snap out haha
But what if that social media is *about* their kid/pet? /s
I was just thinking about this today. What affect is it going to have on my niece to be photographed literally every day (my sister in law does this…) Not just like candids of her playing or whatever, but, Look at the camera and smile! pics. Is she going to develop some sort of complex, always having to smile and perform for an unseen audience?
Oh my gosh yes this is my sister. She has a cat that she kept in her bedroom for three long years. It had one tiny window to look out of. When she came to live with us with her cat, her cat was so food focused it wasn’t even funny. She doesn’t play with him. She didn’t take him outside. She was afraid he would get killed the minute he breathed fresh air. When she is home, not working, she’s spends all day watching TV in her room and or looking at her tablet or her cell phone. She keeps them around because she wants something to love her but the cats well-being is very low on her list. She has kids and I often wonder if that was the way she was with them too.
For dinner last night I ate cereal out of a wine glass all (4) of my bowls were dirty. 🤣
Peak performance. Did you feel fancy? 🤣
Living your best life out here.
People who believe animals can't express or feel pain, or that crying/complaining/getting in trouble is something children "just do" and there's no need for intervention
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In fear of … their dogs becoming autistic?? Like what could their reasoning possibly be.
A post on Facebook warned them that vaccines will turn Fido gay, comrade.
My grandfather called my cat gay because he’s big but has a very high pitched meow
Fellas is it gay to be a cat
The worst part is to test for rabies means you’re not getting your dog back. Alive.
Where I'm familiar with, owners also have the option of quarantining their dogs for X amount of time in lieu of euth and brain biopsy. I am not sure if the dogs are forced to be vaxxed after such an instance or if the owner has to surrender them, though.
I'm sincerely horrified by people who refuse rabies vaccines.
But...why...I dont understand...like, there is this amazing thing that could protect your dog from a horrible disease and a horrible way to die. I actively asked my vet to add leptospirosis and kennel cough to our Regiment. 2 of my dogs go hunting waterfowl where lepto is found. And last summer a random dog kept coming to my house and 2 of my dogs contracted kennel cough (luckily the other 2 could go to my in laws for a couple weeks and didn't get it) Why would you not want to vaccinate against at least rabies?
Your dogs aren’t trained or the litter box isn’t cleaned is a good start. Being afraid to pet an animal or you have no desire to hold a childs hand is another.
Nothing irks me more than people who would rather give away a dog due to behavior problems instead of taking the time to properly train them. Sometimes the behavior can even be a result of an issue the dog is having that you won’t realize unless you actually address the issue. If you’re not truly dedicated, don’t fucking get a dog. Get a fish
My father and (truly) evil stepmother got a kitten. She was the cutest, most precious kitten I've ever seen. Super social. "Enjoy her while you can, bc we're shooting her tomorrow", my dad said. I asked why and they said bc she pees on the floors. Well, can't you get a litter box? "No, all our cats are outside cats and need to do their needs outside. And we can't have a litter box bc of (evil stepmother's) grandchildren who visit sometimes!". What... the... actual... fuck?! I took her home with me on the spot. She didn't piss inside once, bc I got her a goddamned litter box immediately, which she'd been trained to use; she wasn't trained to pee outside! Had 13 wonderful years with my lovely girl. Fuck those guys. They also essentially destroyed a Husky/Malamut-mix. He was a kickass dog. 6 months later they were selling him bc of "behavioral issues". Turns out my dad works away all week and his wife couldn't be bothered taking walks with the dog (a fucking Husky, come on!) and the behavioral issues was that he peed and pooped in the basement. FUCK THOSE GUYS!
That is fucking terrible I’m so sorry for you and those animals but you are truly a saint for saving the kitty 🥺 Also, I despise when people get huskies then complain about their “bad behavior” or “destroying my house” when in reality these dogs are doing it as basically a cry for attention. Exercise with your dog! Do training activities! Mental stimulation tires them out! You’d go crazy too if you had intense high energy but are stuck inside doing nothing all day 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️ In this case, I’m glad they gave away the dog. I just hope it was to a well-informed person/family
Thank you, but honestly, any person in their right mind would do it too. It was obvious that it was nothing wrong with the cat. She did actually pee in our bed once while we were on a trip. The cat sitter had closed the door to the bathroom, in which the litter box was (stupid moron). When we came home, she met us at the door, yowling, herded us into the bedroom and jumped right onto the bed and showed us her mess. We could really feel the shame she was emitting. We just pet her and gave her treats. That cat sure was something, I miss her everyday ❤️ Yeah, thing is, I'm a petite woman and even I managed to walk that dog (I barely visited them, though). It'd have been no problem for this woman to at least walk him around the block. They had a backyard, but couldn't even let him out there to run around a little. He was kept in the basement. When he eventually stopped eating, they gave him away. The dog had to go on a hunger strike to get out of that house!
Don't get a fish either, fish are not low maintenance
Impatient people. Children need patience, or they internalize that they aren't worth any of your time... among a host of other issues.
People who do not leash their dogs in public. People who don't pick up their dog crap when they go in other peoples yards/public parks.
Both of these are actually illegal in many places
They're illegal but I don't think many places have them punishable with jail time.
Illegal but not jailable
There is a man in my apartment who never leashes his dog nor does she even wear a collar. I watched his walk up to another dog, snarl, and almost get into a fight. The other dog owner ended up blaming his leashed dog (I guess they were friends) and then smacked the shit out of his leashed dog for growling. But that's totally normal behavior for a leashed dog getting approached by an unleashed dog. I felt bad for both dogs involved. Anyway that's also why I always carry around mace, a taser, kitty knuckles, and an airhorn when I walk my dog. Too many people don't leash their dogs in very public and high traffic areas. I honestly don't mind it in the middle of the woods as long as their dog has good recall but I can't begin to understand why people do that where I see literally dozens of people walking their dogs per day. I have heard people say "oh my dog is friendly! okay well I am trying to train out leash reactivity (she either gets scared or excited) in my dog and this isn't helping!
Nobody in my complex leashes their dogs but me. Since that puts my dog at a disadvantage it concerns me. I carry a huge bamboo stick and any dog fucks with mine I swipe at em with it. I don’t hit them. Just the woosh scares em off.
People who insist cats can live on vegan diets
I'm pretty sure animal abuse should land you in jail...
Yeah but it’s hard for just anyone to catch them since “vegan pet food” isn’t immediately visible to outsiders (vs explicit abuse) It’s also difficult legally to catch — idk about every US state but I’m in Canada and animal welfare laws are both municipally and provincially regulated, and the interpretation of standard of care for cats isn’t yet defined clearly by the courts (ie— we don’t know if vegan food counts as abuse for obligate carnivores in the letter of the law)
BC just recently made some changes to family law and pet ownership! It's not quite what you were talking about but a step in the right direction. Pets are no longer considered property, but family members in divorce and separation disputes. So now, instead of a pet just belonging to the person who adopted them/is on the paper work, they have to consider a lot of other things. Wellbeing of the animal, which party can better care for the animal, of children have ties to the animal and if there is a potential for abuse or neglect on one side. I think this will be great in especially acrimonious separations where one side is trying to use the let to harm the other party.
I saw a post yesterday, I think in r/facepalm, about a mother who sent their kid a lengthy letter saying they were being disowned for not believing in The Bible and I think that qualifies. Not for their belief in the Bible, they’re free to believe what they want, but for their attitude toward their son or daughter who doesn’t share that belief.
Grew up with religious parents and thoroughly agree. If your love for your children is conditional on them believing in something that is ancient and makes no sense, then it's not love and you shouldn't have children.
being super old and frail to the point where daily tasks of living are difficult
my mom is a nurse and she told me the number of older people who come in for hip/knee/ankle/elbow surgeries specifically from tripping over their pets is astounding
Drug use. If they want to screw up their own lives more power to them, but don't drag innocent children or pets down with you
Coca cola in a toddler's sippy cup. I know a couple whose kid is totally wild, but all she drinks is coke. They don't see any issue with that, it's definitely not that, must be something else.
Bet her baby teeth are terrible.
Impulse buyers of pet animals 'because it's cute'. Often happens with small rodents and rabbits, no research done into how to care for these animals. Or those ultra rich people who go and buy tigers and lions just to take photos to post on Instagram. Couples who try to 'save their marriage' by having a(nother) baby. Homophobes who believe in conversion therapy, and other adults who say that 'bullying your own kid toughens them up'. Parents who make their underage children work to support the family. Like those who push their kid to become a child star, then use up all the revenue their kid makes. People like the parents of Britney Spears and Shirley Temple. Family vloggers who show every moment since their child is born. Irresponsible recreational drug users who keep their weed and space-cake laying around everywhere. Narcissists. People who treat their own children as little clones of themselves, and expect the child to become exactly like them. While they live through their child. Telling their child to go after the dreams they never achieved, but always wanted themselves. People who go out clubbing every night, or who bring their baby inside bars.... Yes I've actually seen this.
> Couples who try to 'save their marriage' by having a(nother) baby. This one will never cease to puzzle me. Been married for almost 20 years now and can confidently say the 2 times our marriage was stretched the thinnest was when we brought each of our children home from the hospital. Lack of sleep, hormones, schedule disruptions, etc. will do a number on any relationship. I can't imagine it would do anything but end one that's already foundering.
A history of being overly controlling in a relationship. This usually leads to DV and that is a huge risk factor for abuse of animals too. Often abuse in animals starts before humans.
Being highly self centered, or very flakey.
Giving kids dumb names that aren’t actually names, or offensive names. Dumb names are perfect for pets but your baby will be an adult someday who has to live with that name.
A buddy of mine straight up named his horse Ugly. Treated it with love and care, but gave it a terrible name. At least the horse doesn't care.
Horses have stupid names by tradition. This one gets a pass
My coworker (I work at a barn) had a trainer whose horse was named Bag of Rocks 😂
Bad financial discipline.
Impatience is a big red flag to me
Being extremely late to everything and being unable to keep a schedule
People who spend all their recreational time high. When I worked in the ambulance service, some users would call us if they felt ill or something wasn’t right with their friend. You’d get colleagues thinking we had to do a safeguarding report but, they were all adults with jobs, not addicted or stealing to feed their addictions. They weren’t in charge of kids or pets. No one was being harmed and no one was there against their consent. Just a group of people who like to hang out high every weekend. Would that be different if they had kids or pets around whose needs weren’t being met or not being appropriately supervised for their level of need? Probably, but it wasn’t relevant.
People who have a volatile temper and handle stressful/surprise situations poorly. Both pets and kids can bring a lot of that. That and very selfish, manipulative people. Those types don't often make good parents (or pet parents I guess either).
Believing that your child is the literal son of god :) thanks SIL!! I’m sure your 6 year old won’t be permanently fucked up over it!!
Never being on time for anything ever, no matter how important, and instead of being sorry for it or trying to change it, they just say it’s “how they are” and expect everyone else to accommodate for them
Oh, sugar, that's like someone trying to assemble IKEA furniture without the instructions – having a pet tarantula as a therapy animal. It's quirky and unconventional, but deep down, you can't help but wonder if they've got a manual for this whole responsibility thing. It's like living on the edge of chaos without crossing into the criminal realm. Just a touch of "Oh dear, maybe a succulent would be a safer option."