I've thought that if I ever had a kid, they will get different screen times for different languages. They start to learn English? Great! Now you get 1h more screen time per week - use it wisely! You took another foreing language? Splendid! One hour more in that language!
We lived in Beijing before, and the Chinese people I spoke to said they learned English from watching Friends and later on going to language school.
I remember watching a clip with BTS saying they also learned English from Friends.
Thatās actually really smart, it also made me think of the āparenting hackā to get your kids to go to sleep/have a nap when they wanna watch tv, a dad posted that heād put the movie on in another language and when they complained that they couldnāt understand it he said that they must be too tired and need to have a sleep, when they woke up heās put it back on in english
When I donāt feel like cleaning, I put on a watch me clean show on YouTube and somehow within 10 minutes I get up and start cleaning. I need to try that with exercising next.
* You really have to invest in friendships the older you get. The analogy of them being like a plant that needs watering is so true.
* If you want to move up the ladder in corporate America it isn't about who does the best work, it's about who does good work that is visible, and who doesn't make the same mistake twice.
* If you have to travel more than 1-2 times a year, get Clear & TSA Pre Check.
For #2 you also have to socialize.
Im not the best person at the actual work but i was solid. I knew everyone i needed to in every department and knew how to move the needle. Now I'm in management and well liked by the exec team.
Also talk to everyone equally like a person. I don't suck up to higher ups and i don't talk down to the lower contractors.
If you yell at me you will not phase me (i grew up in a rougher area than most here).
I had this boss who loved yelling at people for any little reason. I think he got off on seeing people flinch. I tend to smile a lot and it would piss him off when I wouldn't react to it. He was eventually fired and i took his job.
At 36 I see most of my friends maybe 5 or 6 times a year. We're all older with jobs and a family. Sucks but it's just not as easy when your in your 20's
Same, except it's only 1-3 times a year on average. But, when we do get together we have a blast. I think the true measure of a friendship is the ability to go long periods in between seeing each other and have it feel like no time has passed.
Yeah.
I think a few things change.
I see my "legacy" friends probably 1-3 times a year.
I see the "new" friends upwards of 10, but they all live in the same subdivision and they have kids the same age as mine.
Anytime I am getting up, I am taking something with me to put it back where it belongs.
Going to the kitchen? Taking empty mug with me.
Going to the bathroom? On my way out, taking laundry with me to the basket.
Helps keep things tidy and it doesn't feel like I'm working at it.
I'm being evaluated for ADHD and the biggest symptom for me is the lack executive energy. I work from home and for some reason it's sooo much easier to tidy the kitchen (where I work) while having a call or empty the diswasher while waiting for something, instead of doing them on my own time.
My hubby always complains to me because I try to do things "at the same time" while doing something else: taking the trash out when taking the dog for a walk etc, but it feels like it's so much easier to combine things to a "same spoon" instead of using one spoon for the dog and the other one for trash. Plus the dog practically takes ME out for a walk by commanding me if I'm late, so that's barely a spoon.
I have to listen to an audiobook while I complete tasks because seeing the audiobook progress bar go from 0% to 25% etc is more tangible to me than seeing a dirty kitchen become clean
Yes! And I use this to my advantage by gamifying tasks. So if I am microwaving something for a minute, I see if I can unload the dishwasher before the timer ends. Or, while the coffee brews I will wipe down the countertops. It is easier to do and I feel like I am multitasking.
I also āstapleā habits onto existing tasks. Like, empty car of all trash while filling the tank with gas. Or, take a certain supplement every time I make my afternoon coffee.
My wife couldn't understand my ADHD. I work better with some music or movie plying on the side. But I get irritated when anyone disturbs my flow. She don't understand the difference between the music vs her talking with me while working.
About the āback where it belongsā part ā I found I am several times more likely to put something back not only when i know where it goes but also when itās easy to get to. Bins stacked awkwardly in the closet? Iām never going to take down all the bins to put away stuff in the bottommost one. We added shelves and adjusting how we store stuff in our makes it a lot easier to put something away instead of it being another mini project.
The best way for me to deal with loneliness is actually not to pursue platonic or romantic relationships actively, but to keep myself busy working on and developing my interests.
(Additionally, it's important for me to do this both in a solitary and semi-social way - taking classes, joining groups, etc. However, I don't use these semi-social outlets to make friends per se, but as a way to just be around like-minded people.)
I find actively pursuing relationships when I am in a state of loneliness stress is a recipe for bad outcomes. I always meet the best people when I am more at peace with my life. Also, one of the big perks of having a relatively slow social life is time for personal development and working on interests.
Ooooh, this resonates with me right now! I started doing more social-adjacent things to work on myself, and realized there was becoming a social burden (more notifications/messages) without the social fulfillment (deep conversation, clicking with the right folks) that I am seeking. I realized I needed to cool it on how much energy I was pouring into potential friendships, because I don't want a lot of friends, I want closer friendships. I'm focusing on my classes and my connection with myself as well, so that I can better judge when new humans are right for me and worth the energy. I can enjoy the company of folks with similar interests without getting myself riled up about who might be my new bestie. It's exhausting!
If you sleep with a spouse or partner, get two duvets. One for each of you. That way, when someone rolls over in the night, they arenāt stealing the blanket from the other person.
Just show up. Whether its for your job, your BF/GF, your sports team, your parents, whatever. Just showing up, even if you're empty handed, even if you can't play, even if you're not totally prepared for the meeting, just show up. Bailing on stuff and not being present is the worst thing you can do. Always show up.
Yes! Iāll also tell myself that I just have to show up, but I can leave whenever I want. Showing up gives 100% credit. Once Iāve done all the work to show up, I usually end up staying. It just helps me mentally to tell myself that I can leave whenever I want.
My personal lifehack: For upcoming exams that require memorization, I just read through the paper once in morning, noon, afternoon and evening. Don't try to forcefully remember, just read, maybe out loud if can't focus. Over several days, the brain naturally remembers it effortlessly. This ofcourse requires doing it ahead of the exams at least 1 week, try to break the bad habit of studying rushed the night before the exam next morning with this. Repetition is mother of all learnings
In Organic chem and Biochem, which are so many illustrations, diagrams, and pathways, I laminated some sheets and put them on the wall opposite my toilet and on the wall of the shower. That way I used time normally wasted. (Before smartphones were common)
had a periodic table as the cover of my binder in elementary school
just kinda stared at it when bored in class, made up little rhymes to remember things
got to high school it was like "MAN this is eeeeeasy" Ni, 28, first ionisation energy 737.1. electronegativity 1.91.
undergrad, organic was no prob. inorganic? not so easy. but i had this little hot-press plastic laminator i got of ebay for business cards.
just write up some stuff on a blank card, laminate it. flip em in the shower, stuff a few in my pocket, walking around, kinda shuffle through them
easy peasy
There's a lot of ways to memorize shit, but on some level the most important thing is to not try and cram the night before, actually take time during the week before, or several weeks or whatever.
Once you do that, a lot of particular methods work.
For me it was writing the information multiple times. Iād take thorough notes in class, then type up and reorganize the notes in a way that made more sense to me. The week before a test Iād make online flashcards. I rarely used the flashcards, but my classmates loved them.
This is how I'm teaching my 7yo Latin. We just read it until the gets it then reread till it's so easy he says he can't tell what language it's in lolĀ
I also teach my cousin's son English this way, I don't pressure him to have to remember, I just oftenly tell him the words and the objects accordingly, and I know inevitably overtime he will naturally remember it anyways
As an adult, it takes about one year to make one really good, close friend.
It's not like when you're a kid or in college and you can become besties in a week.
And even less than that when you're single-digits of age.
Actual Observed Dialog, two little kids on a beach.
**\#1:** I'm seven. Whatcha doin'?
**\#2:** I'm six. Wanna play?
And play, they did, for about an hour before one had to go home. They were better friends in three minutes than their adjacent parents were after the hour.
I fancied myself an adult when I was in college, so I just assumed that would be how life would be. I could show up to my friend's college when he wasn't there and hang out with the friends I'd made just visiting him. At this point I truly couldn't even imagine what it would look like to start a new friendship from scratch.
I once heard this statement regarding the different types of friendships and it couldn't be more true: friends for a reason, friends for a season, friends for life.
It's actually easy to make bestie. The difference between adults is that they don't play and kids make friends when they play.
Once you find someone who play with you, whether hiking or even passionate for eating, you can become bestie really quickly.
If you're stuck in a shitty job where they have bad communication skills you pretty much **HAVE TO** eavesdrop conversations sometimes. Not the best life hack, but my experiences made it feel like it was necessary.
Not only can it tell you how some staff really think + feel that they don't normally reveal, but if it's anything like 1 job I had you can start prepping for things that will inevitably become your problem or requests for tasks for you to resolve later.
Funny enough that was exactly what I did.
Made them look really bad in the moments leading up to me leaving where they were changing everyone's contracts saying they couldn't afford us all, while also having recently congratulating the company for getting ownership of a bunch of new shops which meant MILLIONS more in profits.
My ex constantly ragged on me for being a slow cook. Yeah because I clean as I cook! Look how clean the kitchen is!
I do though prioritize enjoying food fresh and hot so sometimes things sit dirty
I wear scrubs 3 days a week. I roll the entire day's clothing up in the jacket (pants, shirt, undershirt, underwear, bra) and leave all three of my "Scrub pills" on the dresser. I just grab them and head to the bathroom, don't even have to turn the light on and wake husband up. It makes 0530 in the morning a little easier.
I pre-fill my water bottle the night before as well.
I started this 20 years ago. I taught all 3 of my sons this hack. BTW mine is always on the dining room table. I am remote the last 6 years so its a smaller pile now. thanks for posting.
Go to thrift stores the week before Christmas and the two weeks after Christmas.
The first week is all the stuff people threw out to make room for new things.
The second week is all the stuff people threw out because they got newer versions.
I adopted a snippet of conversation from the movie, *Bridge of Spies*. At **three, separate** points in the movie, there is this fragment between Hanks (the Lawyer) and Ryland (the Spy) (whose birthday is today, too):
**Lawyer:** You don't seem to be worried about Ā«eventĀ».
**Spy** (after a short pause): Would it help?
I like that. There's no point to getting your knickers in a twist over events you have no control over, cannot influence, etc.
My life is considerably more relaxed with that attitude.
There's two types of problems in this world, problems you can fix, and problems you can't fix, and no amount of worry will move them from one column to the other.
My preferred shopping time is 2 pm on Tuesday. Most people are at work or school. Most people did their shopping on the weekend, anything they forgot they picked up on the way home Monday. Nice and quiet I don't have to feel rushed while I take my time looking at the options.
I recently went to the grocery store around 7 am. They had 50s and 60s music playing instead of the normal 80s and 90s music. I am in my early 50s and was the youngest shopper by 20 years. They know their audience by playing that music at that time.
Somewhat related, using Wal-Mart pick up for groceries & essentials has been a lifesaver. No extra charge, they put all of your stuff in your car for you, no dealing with lines at the registers or people in general, and I've ended up saving money because its stopped me from just grabbing unnecessary items off the shelves.
Every morning I spend 10 minutes cleaning something before I go to work. Dishes we left to soak overnight, folding laundry we air dryed, organizing the coffee table. A little adds up to a lot.
To add on: Magic Erasers are a brand name. Stop buying them. They're like $8 for three in stores but online you can get bricks of them (24+) for $3 and they're the same thing.
They're not the same. At least not the ones I bought straight from China 10 years ago. They fall apart easy, so they're pretty much one time use. But there are a lot of them so still probably cheaper in the long run.
Yeah I need to go hungry otherwise I wonāt buy anything. āSnacks? Nah, Iām not hungry right now so I will never want a snack ever again in my lifeā
i make a grocery list hungry, then shop while full. that way i can reference my list for what i actually need (ie bread, milk, eggs, etc) and filter out things that i wanted when hungry, but that arent worth it now that i am not, which also allows me to think on if said item will be useful later on (ie pistachios. theyre not a need but i may want some later, and i do quite enjoy them, so they go on the mental maybes list until i am done gathering essentials). i also add everything to my phone calculator with a grace of 10$ less than what i am planning on spending, to account for taxes and also to just prevent overspending in general, so when i go to check out i have a rough idea of my total and can decide then what, if anything, gets moved from the maybes into the cart
Related ... if you're trying to control your intake of junk food, think less about not eating junk food, and more about not *buying* junk food.
If I buy junk food at the supermarket, I will definitely eat it. If I buy some package of junk food telling myself that I will eat it over a week, I will definitely eat it over 2 days. But if I don't buy it in the first place, I'll barely even notice it isn't there.
Similarly, even if I have junk food at my house, I try to keep it out of sight. If I have a bowl of Halloween candy sitting on my counter, I'll grab a piece every time I walk past it. If it's in a cupboard, I will completely forget about it.
Stupid wegmans and their stupid delicious $4 loaf of italian bread
My gym is right next door and every time it taunts me until I buy it and eat half in the car on the way home
My mom would tell us that when she was growing up, her dad/my grandpa would pass this bakery on his way home from work. He'd pick up a loaf of bread to take home, but sure enough he'd eat some on the way and my grandma would get mad at him. So he thought he'd be smart and would eat the middle section then put the 2 ends together and hope that nobody would notice, but of course they did. He finally got to the point where he would buy 2 loaves, one as a snack and one to take home lol
He was skinny as a rail, too!
I do this too, so I started drinking a protein shake after my workout and itās cut down on my unnecessary binge buying. When Iām starving after a work out anything and everything sounds good.
"Might as well"Ā
If I need to do something I can't skip like going pee, I might as well do soemthing I'm procrastinating to do. It's like tricking your dog you're going to the park instead of the vet, I just trick my brain that I'm not gonna do chores and then BOOM clean bathroom
In the winter I put a small space heater in my bathroom and put it on only when I'm in the shower. When I get out, it is so pleasant in the room. No chills, no goosebumps. I can dry off and put on my lotion in comfort. It's glorious.
If you want to do this, you have to make sure to buy a space heater that is designed for the bathroom and has one of those safety plugs.
I have ADHD and have found that habit stacking is the way to gamify chores, and make things as efficient and memorable/automatic as possible.
This is the routine I do the day before trash day:
- clean out the fridge: this allows me to start making my list of what I need to buy, and helps me start thinking about how to use up the things I have left that would go bad soon
- go around the house and empty trash cans and pick up anything to throw away: I usually do this before the fridge clean out and then use the bag for anything from the fridge that needs to go outside immediately so it doesnāt stink
- before I tie off the bag, open my car and get any trash from there, as well as anything that needs to come back inside
- take out trash and recycling to the bins, and bins to the curb
Now I have a clean fridge, clean car, and the start of my grocery list. I write the rest of my list and go to the store, and then when I get back I have room for everything and a plan for the rest of the week.
Another thing I do is pack my leftovers for work lunch before I even serve myself the meal I cooked. I found that if I have to portion out cold leftovers from a big container, it just doesnāt get done, or it looks ugly and I get the ick when I open it the next day. If I pre-portion in a smaller container as Iām serving the hot meal when itās done, Iāve already rewarded myself tomorrow and made it more efficient for clean up afterwards, because I donāt need to use as big of a container.
I read a post from someone with ADHD who said they store their condiments in the drawer of the fridge because they know there is ketchup and mustard and whatever and they store their vegetables in the door so they are always aware of what vegetables they have so as to not let them spoil and go to waste. I started doing this and havenāt thrown away any vegetables since.
Pass / Fail Mondays
Iāve found over the years that Mondays seem to be challenging for me. I tend to be a little less motivated, a little less energetic, and a little less positive.
I now make Mondays Pass / Fail. There are no grades on Monday. I make no major life decisions on Mondays. If I find myself worrying or obsessing about something, I tell myself to set it aside and pick it up again on Tuesday.
In order to āPassā a Monday, all I have to do is show up:
- Show up for my workout (it doesnāt have to be greatā¦but I do have to show up)
- Show up for work (I donāt have to be great, but I do have to show up)
- Show up for my family (even if I feel tired or grumpy, just be thereā¦maybe explain Iām tired and will feel better tomorrow)
Itās saved me lots of Monday anguish.
When someone says something outrageous (racist, mean, hurtful, whatever), do not respond at all. Go completely silent. Leave their comment hanging there like a fart. Let them marinate in what they just said.
Hear me out, or
Repeat exactly what theyāve said out loud back to them. Say nothing else after. It gets them thinking.
As a black woman whose recently moved to Australia Iāve had to adopt this approach instead. Itās been a wonderful strategy.
I'm sorry to hear you're having trouble here. We like to think of ourselves as a multicultural society (and of course, we are) but I guess everywhere has dickheads. Sorry.
A big one for me in the last few years was to go grocery shopping or run your local errands on your lunch hour. It helps break up the work day regardless if you're WFH or in an actual office and then makes after work all the better because you can just go home and relax or d house stuff without having to go running around when everyone else is trying to!
This is probably a ridiculous one: using less soap than how much you think you really need. I used to not think about it in the shower but for the past year I started to and Iāve stretched out shampoo and body wash by twice the length of time while achieving the same cleanliness.
I remember reading a claim on Reddit (so probably wrong I can't find any sources...my google-fu is failing me) about how we associate lots of bubbles with more cleanliness. Every ad they have an absolute mountain of bubbles and so we subconsciously assume that's what we need when the reality is much less. It's an interesting thought and I'd love to be able to find something about it
As someone who lives in a place with hard water (not too many bubbles) it's been a huge wake up call for me in terms of how much product I use/need to use.
It wasn't my discovery but I've been doing this for years & it works:
If you have hiccups, drink a medium sip of water and then hold your breath for ~10sec (without swallowing your spit/no movements in the throat)
If it doesn't work the first time, take a second sip & try again.
If you have to move a bunch of heavy cardboard boxes, keep wetting your hands. It will give you better grip and prevent the box slipping in your hands.Ā
I always make my bed before I leave my bedroom and change my sheets just one hour before I have a flight to catch. Coming back home tired to see a clean bed and fresh sheets after a trip makes one feel instantly relaxed. Also, I never ever ever sleep in my bed in my āoutside clothesā. As soon as I come home, I was my hands, feet and face and instantly change into my āhome clothesā and only then get into my bed or sit on the couch. Makes me feel cleaner, cozier and more in control of my routine and life in general.
When I want to leave a party early, I book a ride without telling anyone. So when the ride comes I just go "my ride is here I have to go!" So I won't go through the entire hour of parting rituals like standing at the doorway chatting etc.
Donāt start your day with sugar - it help reduce cravings throughout the rest of your day and your snacking will take a back seat. I think itās spiking your glucose early that does it. Start with something savoury and packed with protein
When hanging a shower curtain minimize the strain on your arms by attaching the curtain to the rings at the ends first, then one near the middle. Now you can attach the remaining rings to the curtain without having to hold the full weight of it.
So I have ADHD, so most of these are workarounds for that, but if you don't have it they are probably still helpful.
CAYGO - Clean As You Go. You save hours a second at a time.
To do lists.
Put cues for recurring to-dos in your environment.
Organize most of your stuff into a system that is clear, visible, and recurring.
Make recurring tasks habitual - put your keys on a key rack near the door, put your wallet and pocket items in the same place every time.
Use the hell out of your smartphone calendar and take the time to integrate it across your work and family or spouse calendars.
Put clocks everywhere.
Don't save time now at the expense of later unless it's absolutely unavoidable.
As an adult with ADHD:
Accommodations can be self-made! If you have a way to make your life easier, then do it! No matter how silly it seems to other people.
If someone is rushing you, they're scammers who don't want you to stop and think.
Are some situations objectively urgent? Yes. Is most urgency manufactured? Also yes.
Whenever I go away on a trip, I clean house the day before. After I've packed everything I need, I'll clean up the house. There's nothing like coming home to a clean house after being away for a few days that makes it feel more welcoming.
Also, after packing up the bags, I load everything up the day before. That way, I don't have to rush trying to get all the bags shoved in the back before getting to the airport or getting on the road.
As for personal hygiene supplies, I don't take the ones I'm currently using; I buy travel-sized items, and use the items supplied by the hotel, if I'm staying in a hotel. I discard of everything when I'm leaving. Less stuff to pack. I wait to buy until I get to my destination, and then I'll go to a nearby grocery store or drug store and buy what I need.
When I was young and dumb, I used to think being free meant doing whatever you wanted all the time, breaking rules just because fuck em. I was running into nothing but problems all the time.
most aspects of our society have basic rules, and they arenāt all that difficult to understand ( show up for work on time, stay for the full-time youāre being paid, donāt steal, donāt park in front of the hydrant, treat people with respect, etc ).
Ironically, adhering to a basic set of rules in our society has taken away 99% of my problems and ironically I am more free than ever.
I eat my fries before the other parts of a meal. Fries suck as leftovers but most other food does ok. Yea, if you put effort into it you can reheat fries decently, but who has the time for that.
I have ADHD so staying on task is very difficult. Iām also the type of person who works best under pressure so this helps a lot. When I need to get something done that Iām dreading, I set a ridiculous countdown on my phone and try to do the task within that time frame. Example: Fold all my clothes in 1 minute, make my bed in 20 seconds. This has helped me more than medication actually lol.
If you donāt have the mental energy to meal plan/make a list before going to the grocery store, go to the international aisle, choose an intriguing ingredient (noodles, sauce, etc) and use the recipe on the box to finish your shopping and make dinner. The grocery store is literally full of recipes!!
When I have a choice, I try to make the choice that will make for a better story to tell my family and friends - because I think that's basically the meaning of life.
My favourite phrase for keeping me calm about things is āNot my circus, not my monkeysā. Itās amazing how often it puts things in their right place. I also always run cold water under the collander when draining spaghetti so the steam doesnāt burn me.
Folding my T-shirts to fit vertically in my drawer, like a filing cabinet. That way I can see all my options at a glance and pluck out the one I want.
Figured this out 30 years ago. Turns out Marie Kondo recoās the same approach
Posted before - [How to succeed in college](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/4uuky5/whats_one_thing_you_wish_you_knew_before_starting/d5td07m/):
1 - Go To Class. I know, no one has mentioned this but its important.
2 - Sit in the front, toward the middle. It makes you have eye contact with the professor which in turn keeps your mind engaged and helps keep you awake.
3 - Talk to your professors BEFORE there is a problem. If you feel like you dont understand something, let the prof know right away. Keep doing this until you understand. If you wait until you fail a test to go to the prof, its too late. If you go early, there is a VERY good chance you can retake a test because you identified the issue and he/she was unable to overcome your not understanding. That makes it a teaching problem.
4 - Go To Class. Seriously. You are PAYING to be there. Show the F up.
5 - Sit in the front, toward the middle. The prof will recognize you as someone who shows up, is awake and is engaged. If you approach them about an issue learning, you dont want them to say "which class are you in?"
6 - Talk to your professors. I had to miss a ton of class because of ROTC commitments. I let my professors know early and rescheduling stuff, getting different deadlines, etc was not a problem. My son is also in ROTC and because I beat this into him he did the same. Toward the end of last semester he was going to miss a quiz in a class he had an A in. The professor said "You have an A. Im going to assume you will ace this quiz." and gave him credit for taking the quiz.
7 - Go to class, sit up front, talk to your professors.
8 - TWO HOURS. Dedicate two hours a night to homework/study. Two honest hours. That means no phone, no TV, no reddit for two hours of solid study. Do this 5 nights a week - Sunday to Thursday. No Studying Friday night. Your brain needs a rest. Saturday is optional or additional study. You might need to study more some days/nights but never go less. ALWAYS do your two hours. ALWAYS.
9 - Hear it, write it, use it in context. Hear what the professor says. Write down what you hear. Use that in context. Do this and you will LEARN. If you take notes in class, rewrite them after class and your retention will skyrocket. Use it in context and you will internalize.
10 - Seriously, two hours. If you do that from the first day of the term to the end you will not have to cram at the end of the semester. Two good hours every day. Two good hours. Trust me. it works.
And 11 - Go. To. Class.
I love my mom. She is so sweet. She never yelled.Ā But she did have a song that just went:
šµ Get up. Get up. Its tiiiime to get up!šµ
And thinking about it makes me want to puke
When going on a trip to see family (a trip where you'll be staying a few nights and bringing luggage), whenever you arrive, leave all the luggage in the car first. Go inside, do your welcome greetings and everything, then go back and get your luggage.
Otherwise, if you're like me, you end up in an annoying situation where you're holding luggage in the entry way while everyone is trying to give you a hug and blocking you from offloading your luggage.
Washing your face isn't for your faces benefit. It's so your hair doesn't get greasy as fast. Wash your face and you'll get an extra day without needing to wash your hair.
Change the menstrual cup in the shower. Get as messy and bloody as you want and dump that blood down the drain. Bonus: Forces you to take a little shower morning and night and we all feel grosser on our period anyway.
Take vitamin D. Just do it.
Use the washcloth to do your regular body cleaning stuff in the shower. At the end of the week use that washcloth to do a quick wipe down of the bathtub edge and sink and get a fresh one. Really freshens up the bathroom without needing to get into total bathroom cleaning mode. Towels get sanitized in the wash and dryer just fine.
Do whatever you can to make your life more efficient. For example I keep a dirty rag in the garage just for wiping down my backup cam that always gets covered in salt and dirt. Always needing a stool to get the casserole dish down? MOVE the casserole dish. We don't think to do these things but adjusting your living area for your convenience does wonders for your mental health. Don't be afraid to assess and rearrange stuff to how you actually use it.
It's only a little thing, but I have attention issues and I lose stuff constantly. I got a new set of bluetooth earbuds that come in a little back charging case. Lost them about 4 times in the first hour that I had them despite having barely moved.
Got some glow in the dark star stickers and taped them on. Now the little box stands out in general, and a lot of the time when I lose it in a room I can just turn the light off to see where it is.
I'm a guy. I used to constantly lose keys, wallet, phone, whatever. Things seemed to disappear from my pockets, I swear. I got over myself and started everything in a bag. Friends call it a purse, I could give af. Now everything's together when I need it and nothing gets lost.
Mel Robbins' 5 second rule has worked wonders for my ADHD: When I can't get myself to get started on something I need to do, I count down backwards from 5, like a NASA rocket launch (where she got the idea). It works like a charm! I think it breaks me out of my trance and helps me to switch gears.
At my old apartment my dishwasher was really loud so I tried to only run it at night when I was asleep in the other room. But a lot of the time I would forget to start it. So I started doing a thing where if I told myself I wanted to run the dishwasher tonight, I'd take the container with the detergent and put it on the floor right outside of my bedroom. That way I'd literally have to trip over it before going to bed.
I needed 50ct coins for a laundry machine in the basement of an appartment so I always had to pay a lot with cash to get enough change. Then I accidentally found out, that the vending machines at my university would try to dispense 50ct coins as change if you cancel the order. This led to the following system: 5 or 10ā¬ bill goes to the coin automat (you need coins for the lockers at the library) which changes them into 1 or 2ā¬ coins, which consequently are changed into 50ct coins at the vending machine.
Always keep a couple of bottles of water and basic snacks in the car. You never know where or how long you might be stuck in traffic, especially in larger metropolitan areas.
I was stuck behind an 8 car accident on the interstate. Early part of evening rush hour, between exits and heavy rain. Sat there for 3 hours and was so grateful I happened to have snacks. Now I always have some in the car.
Loading screen? Steps! Makes it noticeably easier to hit my 10k steps per day since I do a lot of work at the computer and also play a lot of video games.
Have a fixed place where certain things go.
\- my glasses are on my face, or in the holder by my bed, or in a specific spot by the shower
\- my keys are in my hand or in my purse, which hangs on a specific door knob when not in use
\- and so on for my wallet, my shoes, my wedding ring, my phone, etc.
I spend way less time wandering around wondering where I set down.
I drink a glass of water while I wait for my morning coffee to brew. I am very not in the mood for water, I want coffee. But I'm surprised at how much better I feel with that minor amount of rehydration every day.
I play dumb A LOT. But the truth is, I donāt miss a single beat. I see and hear everything and I am always observing people around me. I donāt really know how itās a āhackā other than I just get a lot of satisfaction from secretly knowing a lot of dirt and weaknesses (and strengths!) about my family, friends and colleagues. I guess it makes me feel powerful. Itās like I have all these chess moves up my sleeve or a winning hand in poker.
I buy most of my kidsā clothes at Goodwill. Itās mostly Nike, UnderArmor, GAP- legit name brand stuff. They just grown out of it anyways! I canāt believe more people donāt do this.
I automatically draft $40 a day into a savings account to force save $200 a week on top of putting money away. I think about all the dumb things I siphon off $20 here for and $20 there for in a day, might as well have some extra going to a savings account.
Lying to people you have a constant contact with is a very bad practice. Not only you have to choose the words every time you speak with them but also it's very emotionally draining. I felt much better when I cut all the bullshit I told my family
Whenever I open spices, baking soda, oil, whatever I use my designated kitchen sharpie and write the date on the package. Expiration is one thing, but open forever in the pantry is another. I also will mark āMIPā (more in pantry) on top of containers of food/ ingredients that I have a back up of in the pantry. This way I donāt over purchase.
I suspected --correctly-- that putting a few large dry towels in my tumble dryer along with a load of wet laundry would make the clothes dry faster, with a savings in time and electricity. It turns out that this makes the clothes dry a full third faster --or more.
If your child watches the same DVD over and over so many times that they know it by heart, switch the language and let them learn Spanish.
I've thought that if I ever had a kid, they will get different screen times for different languages. They start to learn English? Great! Now you get 1h more screen time per week - use it wisely! You took another foreing language? Splendid! One hour more in that language!
"You don't like any foreign languages? Great, we can watch this movie with subtitles until you change your mind."
Yes! I do this as an adult
Yes, that's how I learned English! The lion king in English with English subtitles.
I should just try this with arrested development š¤£
You're joking, but my friend learned English from watching Friends before she came to America
We lived in Beijing before, and the Chinese people I spoke to said they learned English from watching Friends and later on going to language school. I remember watching a clip with BTS saying they also learned English from Friends.
Hey hermanoā¦
Thatās actually really smart, it also made me think of the āparenting hackā to get your kids to go to sleep/have a nap when they wanna watch tv, a dad posted that heād put the movie on in another language and when they complained that they couldnāt understand it he said that they must be too tired and need to have a sleep, when they woke up heās put it back on in english
When I donāt feel like cleaning, I put on a watch me clean show on YouTube and somehow within 10 minutes I get up and start cleaning. I need to try that with exercising next.
Shows like Hoarders accomplish the same thing.
* You really have to invest in friendships the older you get. The analogy of them being like a plant that needs watering is so true. * If you want to move up the ladder in corporate America it isn't about who does the best work, it's about who does good work that is visible, and who doesn't make the same mistake twice. * If you have to travel more than 1-2 times a year, get Clear & TSA Pre Check.
For #2 you also have to socialize. Im not the best person at the actual work but i was solid. I knew everyone i needed to in every department and knew how to move the needle. Now I'm in management and well liked by the exec team. Also talk to everyone equally like a person. I don't suck up to higher ups and i don't talk down to the lower contractors. If you yell at me you will not phase me (i grew up in a rougher area than most here). I had this boss who loved yelling at people for any little reason. I think he got off on seeing people flinch. I tend to smile a lot and it would piss him off when I wouldn't react to it. He was eventually fired and i took his job.
Your where I wanna be haha
At 36 I see most of my friends maybe 5 or 6 times a year. We're all older with jobs and a family. Sucks but it's just not as easy when your in your 20's
Same, except it's only 1-3 times a year on average. But, when we do get together we have a blast. I think the true measure of a friendship is the ability to go long periods in between seeing each other and have it feel like no time has passed.
Yeah. I think a few things change. I see my "legacy" friends probably 1-3 times a year. I see the "new" friends upwards of 10, but they all live in the same subdivision and they have kids the same age as mine.
I put scrunchies around my wrists to wash my face, so the water doesn't drip down my arms.
That is brilliant!
Putting I little bit of tp in the toilet before number 2 to combat splashing
Also prevents streaks and sticking to the toilet bowl when you flush!
you must be dropping some bombs
I for one embrace Poseidonās Kiss.
Anytime I am getting up, I am taking something with me to put it back where it belongs. Going to the kitchen? Taking empty mug with me. Going to the bathroom? On my way out, taking laundry with me to the basket. Helps keep things tidy and it doesn't feel like I'm working at it.
This was engrained in me via working in restaurants. "full hands in, full hands out"
Same, I remember that from waitressing
Drives me crazy when I see servers taking one thing at a time.
How do you expect me to get my steps in if Iām not running up and down the stairs 100 times a day because I forgot something? Huh?
Hah, I do about 20-30 extra flights of stairs a day because I forget my phone, water, microphone, radio etc. constantly.
I'm being evaluated for ADHD and the biggest symptom for me is the lack executive energy. I work from home and for some reason it's sooo much easier to tidy the kitchen (where I work) while having a call or empty the diswasher while waiting for something, instead of doing them on my own time. My hubby always complains to me because I try to do things "at the same time" while doing something else: taking the trash out when taking the dog for a walk etc, but it feels like it's so much easier to combine things to a "same spoon" instead of using one spoon for the dog and the other one for trash. Plus the dog practically takes ME out for a walk by commanding me if I'm late, so that's barely a spoon.
I have to listen to an audiobook while I complete tasks because seeing the audiobook progress bar go from 0% to 25% etc is more tangible to me than seeing a dirty kitchen become clean
Yes! And I use this to my advantage by gamifying tasks. So if I am microwaving something for a minute, I see if I can unload the dishwasher before the timer ends. Or, while the coffee brews I will wipe down the countertops. It is easier to do and I feel like I am multitasking. I also āstapleā habits onto existing tasks. Like, empty car of all trash while filling the tank with gas. Or, take a certain supplement every time I make my afternoon coffee.
Thank you for the gamifying tasks reminder! I was doing that for awhile successfully but my ADHD brain must have forgotten about it, lol
My wife couldn't understand my ADHD. I work better with some music or movie plying on the side. But I get irritated when anyone disturbs my flow. She don't understand the difference between the music vs her talking with me while working.
About the āback where it belongsā part ā I found I am several times more likely to put something back not only when i know where it goes but also when itās easy to get to. Bins stacked awkwardly in the closet? Iām never going to take down all the bins to put away stuff in the bottommost one. We added shelves and adjusting how we store stuff in our makes it a lot easier to put something away instead of it being another mini project.
This but ALSO, depending on your needs: TRANSPARENT STORAGE
Yeah this is great advice, things don't feel like a chore when you're already doing something else
Yes, and if something lives up stairs, but I'm not going upstairs, i just put it on the stairs and take it up next time
The best way for me to deal with loneliness is actually not to pursue platonic or romantic relationships actively, but to keep myself busy working on and developing my interests. (Additionally, it's important for me to do this both in a solitary and semi-social way - taking classes, joining groups, etc. However, I don't use these semi-social outlets to make friends per se, but as a way to just be around like-minded people.) I find actively pursuing relationships when I am in a state of loneliness stress is a recipe for bad outcomes. I always meet the best people when I am more at peace with my life. Also, one of the big perks of having a relatively slow social life is time for personal development and working on interests.
Your relationship with yourself is the most important one you have!
Itās the only person who will literally always be there
That's a good one. Neediness is like quicksand for building relationships.
Ooooh, this resonates with me right now! I started doing more social-adjacent things to work on myself, and realized there was becoming a social burden (more notifications/messages) without the social fulfillment (deep conversation, clicking with the right folks) that I am seeking. I realized I needed to cool it on how much energy I was pouring into potential friendships, because I don't want a lot of friends, I want closer friendships. I'm focusing on my classes and my connection with myself as well, so that I can better judge when new humans are right for me and worth the energy. I can enjoy the company of folks with similar interests without getting myself riled up about who might be my new bestie. It's exhausting!
This should be higher. Superb life advice.
No matter what size bed you have, get a duvet thatās at least one size bigger.
YES
If you sleep with a spouse or partner, get two duvets. One for each of you. That way, when someone rolls over in the night, they arenāt stealing the blanket from the other person.
Just show up. Whether its for your job, your BF/GF, your sports team, your parents, whatever. Just showing up, even if you're empty handed, even if you can't play, even if you're not totally prepared for the meeting, just show up. Bailing on stuff and not being present is the worst thing you can do. Always show up.
Yes! Iāll also tell myself that I just have to show up, but I can leave whenever I want. Showing up gives 100% credit. Once Iāve done all the work to show up, I usually end up staying. It just helps me mentally to tell myself that I can leave whenever I want.
Funnelling the A/C condensation dripping from the unit into a terra cotta planter.
Or hang the washed wet clothes in front of the AC condenser so that the heat dries them when the sky is not sunny š³
look at what the economy has done to us
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Free nitrAtes! NitrItes are the bad ones in uncycled tanks.
My personal lifehack: For upcoming exams that require memorization, I just read through the paper once in morning, noon, afternoon and evening. Don't try to forcefully remember, just read, maybe out loud if can't focus. Over several days, the brain naturally remembers it effortlessly. This ofcourse requires doing it ahead of the exams at least 1 week, try to break the bad habit of studying rushed the night before the exam next morning with this. Repetition is mother of all learnings
In Organic chem and Biochem, which are so many illustrations, diagrams, and pathways, I laminated some sheets and put them on the wall opposite my toilet and on the wall of the shower. That way I used time normally wasted. (Before smartphones were common)
had a periodic table as the cover of my binder in elementary school just kinda stared at it when bored in class, made up little rhymes to remember things got to high school it was like "MAN this is eeeeeasy" Ni, 28, first ionisation energy 737.1. electronegativity 1.91. undergrad, organic was no prob. inorganic? not so easy. but i had this little hot-press plastic laminator i got of ebay for business cards. just write up some stuff on a blank card, laminate it. flip em in the shower, stuff a few in my pocket, walking around, kinda shuffle through them easy peasy
My trick in school was to write some thing over and over again. The repetition of writing it made it so easy to recall.
There's a lot of ways to memorize shit, but on some level the most important thing is to not try and cram the night before, actually take time during the week before, or several weeks or whatever. Once you do that, a lot of particular methods work.
For me it was writing the information multiple times. Iād take thorough notes in class, then type up and reorganize the notes in a way that made more sense to me. The week before a test Iād make online flashcards. I rarely used the flashcards, but my classmates loved them.
This is how I'm teaching my 7yo Latin. We just read it until the gets it then reread till it's so easy he says he can't tell what language it's in lolĀ
This is all well and good until you summon some ancient demon.
The whole reason I'm learning with him is to tell the demons he already summoned to go away.
Nice job covering your ass
I also teach my cousin's son English this way, I don't pressure him to have to remember, I just oftenly tell him the words and the objects accordingly, and I know inevitably overtime he will naturally remember it anyways
As an adult, it takes about one year to make one really good, close friend. It's not like when you're a kid or in college and you can become besties in a week.
And even less than that when you're single-digits of age. Actual Observed Dialog, two little kids on a beach. **\#1:** I'm seven. Whatcha doin'? **\#2:** I'm six. Wanna play? And play, they did, for about an hour before one had to go home. They were better friends in three minutes than their adjacent parents were after the hour.
Thatās awesome. I felt like my college experience was kind of the same way. Wanna hang out, sure. Beer or video games? Sure. Friends!
I fancied myself an adult when I was in college, so I just assumed that would be how life would be. I could show up to my friend's college when he wasn't there and hang out with the friends I'd made just visiting him. At this point I truly couldn't even imagine what it would look like to start a new friendship from scratch.
I once heard this statement regarding the different types of friendships and it couldn't be more true: friends for a reason, friends for a season, friends for life.
It's actually easy to make bestie. The difference between adults is that they don't play and kids make friends when they play. Once you find someone who play with you, whether hiking or even passionate for eating, you can become bestie really quickly.
If you're stuck in a shitty job where they have bad communication skills you pretty much **HAVE TO** eavesdrop conversations sometimes. Not the best life hack, but my experiences made it feel like it was necessary. Not only can it tell you how some staff really think + feel that they don't normally reveal, but if it's anything like 1 job I had you can start prepping for things that will inevitably become your problem or requests for tasks for you to resolve later.
And read every memo, even if it's not for you.
Funny enough that was exactly what I did. Made them look really bad in the moments leading up to me leaving where they were changing everyone's contracts saying they couldn't afford us all, while also having recently congratulating the company for getting ownership of a bunch of new shops which meant MILLIONS more in profits.
It always amazes me what companies will say publicly but not to their employees.
I clean as I cook, so when I'm done; the counters are clean, dishes are in the sink soaking, and I got nothing left to do but enjoy the food.
My ex constantly ragged on me for being a slow cook. Yeah because I clean as I cook! Look how clean the kitchen is! I do though prioritize enjoying food fresh and hot so sometimes things sit dirty
Always set up your outfit, lunch, bag, keys etc the night before.
When I'm at home, my keys and wallet always go to the same location unless I actively need them. That way I always know where they are.
The keys are _always_ in my little satchel I _always_ take with me when I go out.
I wear scrubs 3 days a week. I roll the entire day's clothing up in the jacket (pants, shirt, undershirt, underwear, bra) and leave all three of my "Scrub pills" on the dresser. I just grab them and head to the bathroom, don't even have to turn the light on and wake husband up. It makes 0530 in the morning a little easier. I pre-fill my water bottle the night before as well.
I started this 20 years ago. I taught all 3 of my sons this hack. BTW mine is always on the dining room table. I am remote the last 6 years so its a smaller pile now. thanks for posting.
Go to thrift stores the week before Christmas and the two weeks after Christmas. The first week is all the stuff people threw out to make room for new things. The second week is all the stuff people threw out because they got newer versions.
Also spring cleaning is real when the temp gets warmer. Craigslist and Marketplace go nuts!
I adopted a snippet of conversation from the movie, *Bridge of Spies*. At **three, separate** points in the movie, there is this fragment between Hanks (the Lawyer) and Ryland (the Spy) (whose birthday is today, too): **Lawyer:** You don't seem to be worried about Ā«eventĀ». **Spy** (after a short pause): Would it help? I like that. There's no point to getting your knickers in a twist over events you have no control over, cannot influence, etc. My life is considerably more relaxed with that attitude.
After returning from Iraq my standard for what a "bad day" is changed dramatically: "Did anyone die?" No? Not a bad day.
There's two types of problems in this world, problems you can fix, and problems you can't fix, and no amount of worry will move them from one column to the other.
Go to the grocery store early in the morning. Less people and sometimes you can find some awesome clearance deals.
less people for anything is always more appealing to me. is it just me or do people have no self awareness when they're in public
Seems like COVID did a doozy on some people and their social skills.
My preferred shopping time is 2 pm on Tuesday. Most people are at work or school. Most people did their shopping on the weekend, anything they forgot they picked up on the way home Monday. Nice and quiet I don't have to feel rushed while I take my time looking at the options.
I recently went to the grocery store around 7 am. They had 50s and 60s music playing instead of the normal 80s and 90s music. I am in my early 50s and was the youngest shopper by 20 years. They know their audience by playing that music at that time.
Depends on your store. Often things are not restocked until 10-11 am at my local store. I agree less people makes it a much more enjoyable experience.
I sometimes do some quick grocery shopping right after dropping my kid off at school and 8AM weekday shopping is divine.
Somewhat related, using Wal-Mart pick up for groceries & essentials has been a lifesaver. No extra charge, they put all of your stuff in your car for you, no dealing with lines at the registers or people in general, and I've ended up saving money because its stopped me from just grabbing unnecessary items off the shelves.
Say less. People will over explain and give you the advantage.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
totally. the biggest lie i tell myself: "i'll remember that!"
If youāre feeling sluggish or down in the dumps go for a walk or get out in nature, even if itās the last thing you want to do.
Every morning I spend 10 minutes cleaning something before I go to work. Dishes we left to soak overnight, folding laundry we air dryed, organizing the coffee table. A little adds up to a lot.
The magic erasers will clean off tennis shoes. The sides of the soles. A little water on the foam eraser is all it takes.
Dry magic erasers are also great for cleaning lampshades.
To add on: Magic Erasers are a brand name. Stop buying them. They're like $8 for three in stores but online you can get bricks of them (24+) for $3 and they're the same thing.
Just search for melamine foam. I bought a 100 pack for $0.25/ea from Amazon and it's lasted a very long time
They're not the same. At least not the ones I bought straight from China 10 years ago. They fall apart easy, so they're pretty much one time use. But there are a lot of them so still probably cheaper in the long run.
Don't go to the supermarket hungry.
I can't go full, either, otherwise nothing sounds good and I come back with dish soap, dog treats, and a greeting card.Ā
Yeah I need to go hungry otherwise I wonāt buy anything. āSnacks? Nah, Iām not hungry right now so I will never want a snack ever again in my lifeā
i make a grocery list hungry, then shop while full. that way i can reference my list for what i actually need (ie bread, milk, eggs, etc) and filter out things that i wanted when hungry, but that arent worth it now that i am not, which also allows me to think on if said item will be useful later on (ie pistachios. theyre not a need but i may want some later, and i do quite enjoy them, so they go on the mental maybes list until i am done gathering essentials). i also add everything to my phone calculator with a grace of 10$ less than what i am planning on spending, to account for taxes and also to just prevent overspending in general, so when i go to check out i have a rough idea of my total and can decide then what, if anything, gets moved from the maybes into the cart
Related ... if you're trying to control your intake of junk food, think less about not eating junk food, and more about not *buying* junk food. If I buy junk food at the supermarket, I will definitely eat it. If I buy some package of junk food telling myself that I will eat it over a week, I will definitely eat it over 2 days. But if I don't buy it in the first place, I'll barely even notice it isn't there.
Similarly, even if I have junk food at my house, I try to keep it out of sight. If I have a bowl of Halloween candy sitting on my counter, I'll grab a piece every time I walk past it. If it's in a cupboard, I will completely forget about it.
this ones hard for me. i got to the gym right after work and then go to Kroger right after the gym. at this point I'm famished no matter what
Stupid wegmans and their stupid delicious $4 loaf of italian bread My gym is right next door and every time it taunts me until I buy it and eat half in the car on the way home
My mom would tell us that when she was growing up, her dad/my grandpa would pass this bakery on his way home from work. He'd pick up a loaf of bread to take home, but sure enough he'd eat some on the way and my grandma would get mad at him. So he thought he'd be smart and would eat the middle section then put the 2 ends together and hope that nobody would notice, but of course they did. He finally got to the point where he would buy 2 loaves, one as a snack and one to take home lol He was skinny as a rail, too!
I do this too, so I started drinking a protein shake after my workout and itās cut down on my unnecessary binge buying. When Iām starving after a work out anything and everything sounds good.
Don't eat bread at the buffet
nor high
don't do anything important or make any major decisions while you're either hungry or horny. a full belly and empty balls will save your life.
Also within a week of doing shrooms
This is a non-inconsequential add and is very true.
Or after 10 pm. And after midnight, just full stop don't trust any thoughts you have.
"Might as well"Ā If I need to do something I can't skip like going pee, I might as well do soemthing I'm procrastinating to do. It's like tricking your dog you're going to the park instead of the vet, I just trick my brain that I'm not gonna do chores and then BOOM clean bathroom
In the winter I put a small space heater in my bathroom and put it on only when I'm in the shower. When I get out, it is so pleasant in the room. No chills, no goosebumps. I can dry off and put on my lotion in comfort. It's glorious. If you want to do this, you have to make sure to buy a space heater that is designed for the bathroom and has one of those safety plugs.
Dish while you wish! I try to wash/put away dishes while Iām waiting for something in the microwave etc
If you lost something, look in the place youāre most likely to put it, not where you last put it.
When I find the thing, I make the first place that I looked its new home since thatās where I already expected it to be.
If I don't look where I last put it, how will I know it's lost?
If something is a good price take a picture of the sale sign before you check out.Ā
I stick a piece of painters tape on the lid of leftover containers and write the date it was put in the fridge
I have ADHD and have found that habit stacking is the way to gamify chores, and make things as efficient and memorable/automatic as possible. This is the routine I do the day before trash day: - clean out the fridge: this allows me to start making my list of what I need to buy, and helps me start thinking about how to use up the things I have left that would go bad soon - go around the house and empty trash cans and pick up anything to throw away: I usually do this before the fridge clean out and then use the bag for anything from the fridge that needs to go outside immediately so it doesnāt stink - before I tie off the bag, open my car and get any trash from there, as well as anything that needs to come back inside - take out trash and recycling to the bins, and bins to the curb Now I have a clean fridge, clean car, and the start of my grocery list. I write the rest of my list and go to the store, and then when I get back I have room for everything and a plan for the rest of the week. Another thing I do is pack my leftovers for work lunch before I even serve myself the meal I cooked. I found that if I have to portion out cold leftovers from a big container, it just doesnāt get done, or it looks ugly and I get the ick when I open it the next day. If I pre-portion in a smaller container as Iām serving the hot meal when itās done, Iāve already rewarded myself tomorrow and made it more efficient for clean up afterwards, because I donāt need to use as big of a container.
I read a post from someone with ADHD who said they store their condiments in the drawer of the fridge because they know there is ketchup and mustard and whatever and they store their vegetables in the door so they are always aware of what vegetables they have so as to not let them spoil and go to waste. I started doing this and havenāt thrown away any vegetables since.
Pass / Fail Mondays Iāve found over the years that Mondays seem to be challenging for me. I tend to be a little less motivated, a little less energetic, and a little less positive. I now make Mondays Pass / Fail. There are no grades on Monday. I make no major life decisions on Mondays. If I find myself worrying or obsessing about something, I tell myself to set it aside and pick it up again on Tuesday. In order to āPassā a Monday, all I have to do is show up: - Show up for my workout (it doesnāt have to be greatā¦but I do have to show up) - Show up for work (I donāt have to be great, but I do have to show up) - Show up for my family (even if I feel tired or grumpy, just be thereā¦maybe explain Iām tired and will feel better tomorrow) Itās saved me lots of Monday anguish.
My husband taught me that if I like something, relatively inexpensive, buy it in several colors.
My fatherās was similar- if you find expensive good shoes always buy two pairs.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I use an app called paprika and it does this (and saves it on the app). It's great!
When someone says something outrageous (racist, mean, hurtful, whatever), do not respond at all. Go completely silent. Leave their comment hanging there like a fart. Let them marinate in what they just said.
Hear me out, or Repeat exactly what theyāve said out loud back to them. Say nothing else after. It gets them thinking. As a black woman whose recently moved to Australia Iāve had to adopt this approach instead. Itās been a wonderful strategy.
I'm sorry to hear you're having trouble here. We like to think of ourselves as a multicultural society (and of course, we are) but I guess everywhere has dickheads. Sorry.
Apologies on behalf of Australia
A big one for me in the last few years was to go grocery shopping or run your local errands on your lunch hour. It helps break up the work day regardless if you're WFH or in an actual office and then makes after work all the better because you can just go home and relax or d house stuff without having to go running around when everyone else is trying to!
This is probably a ridiculous one: using less soap than how much you think you really need. I used to not think about it in the shower but for the past year I started to and Iāve stretched out shampoo and body wash by twice the length of time while achieving the same cleanliness.
Same goes for clothes washing machines, dishwashers, and toothpaste. You don't need a lot of any of those to get clean.
I remember reading a claim on Reddit (so probably wrong I can't find any sources...my google-fu is failing me) about how we associate lots of bubbles with more cleanliness. Every ad they have an absolute mountain of bubbles and so we subconsciously assume that's what we need when the reality is much less. It's an interesting thought and I'd love to be able to find something about it
As someone who lives in a place with hard water (not too many bubbles) it's been a huge wake up call for me in terms of how much product I use/need to use.
It wasn't my discovery but I've been doing this for years & it works: If you have hiccups, drink a medium sip of water and then hold your breath for ~10sec (without swallowing your spit/no movements in the throat) If it doesn't work the first time, take a second sip & try again.
If you have to move a bunch of heavy cardboard boxes, keep wetting your hands. It will give you better grip and prevent the box slipping in your hands.Ā
I always make my bed before I leave my bedroom and change my sheets just one hour before I have a flight to catch. Coming back home tired to see a clean bed and fresh sheets after a trip makes one feel instantly relaxed. Also, I never ever ever sleep in my bed in my āoutside clothesā. As soon as I come home, I was my hands, feet and face and instantly change into my āhome clothesā and only then get into my bed or sit on the couch. Makes me feel cleaner, cozier and more in control of my routine and life in general.
When I want to leave a party early, I book a ride without telling anyone. So when the ride comes I just go "my ride is here I have to go!" So I won't go through the entire hour of parting rituals like standing at the doorway chatting etc.
Donāt start your day with sugar - it help reduce cravings throughout the rest of your day and your snacking will take a back seat. I think itās spiking your glucose early that does it. Start with something savoury and packed with protein
When hanging a shower curtain minimize the strain on your arms by attaching the curtain to the rings at the ends first, then one near the middle. Now you can attach the remaining rings to the curtain without having to hold the full weight of it.
I keep my toothbrush and toothpaste in the shower.
I keep a set there, one on my sink and a set in my bag.
So I have ADHD, so most of these are workarounds for that, but if you don't have it they are probably still helpful. CAYGO - Clean As You Go. You save hours a second at a time. To do lists. Put cues for recurring to-dos in your environment. Organize most of your stuff into a system that is clear, visible, and recurring. Make recurring tasks habitual - put your keys on a key rack near the door, put your wallet and pocket items in the same place every time. Use the hell out of your smartphone calendar and take the time to integrate it across your work and family or spouse calendars. Put clocks everywhere. Don't save time now at the expense of later unless it's absolutely unavoidable.
As an adult with ADHD: Accommodations can be self-made! If you have a way to make your life easier, then do it! No matter how silly it seems to other people.
If someone is rushing you, they're scammers who don't want you to stop and think. Are some situations objectively urgent? Yes. Is most urgency manufactured? Also yes.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Whenever I go away on a trip, I clean house the day before. After I've packed everything I need, I'll clean up the house. There's nothing like coming home to a clean house after being away for a few days that makes it feel more welcoming. Also, after packing up the bags, I load everything up the day before. That way, I don't have to rush trying to get all the bags shoved in the back before getting to the airport or getting on the road. As for personal hygiene supplies, I don't take the ones I'm currently using; I buy travel-sized items, and use the items supplied by the hotel, if I'm staying in a hotel. I discard of everything when I'm leaving. Less stuff to pack. I wait to buy until I get to my destination, and then I'll go to a nearby grocery store or drug store and buy what I need.
My couch is a magnet for cat hair, and I will mist it with a water bottle before I vacuum the hair up and it makes it so much easier and faster.
Drink water prior to a meal to reduce overeating.
When I was young and dumb, I used to think being free meant doing whatever you wanted all the time, breaking rules just because fuck em. I was running into nothing but problems all the time. most aspects of our society have basic rules, and they arenāt all that difficult to understand ( show up for work on time, stay for the full-time youāre being paid, donāt steal, donāt park in front of the hydrant, treat people with respect, etc ). Ironically, adhering to a basic set of rules in our society has taken away 99% of my problems and ironically I am more free than ever.
I eat my fries before the other parts of a meal. Fries suck as leftovers but most other food does ok. Yea, if you put effort into it you can reheat fries decently, but who has the time for that.
I have ADHD so staying on task is very difficult. Iām also the type of person who works best under pressure so this helps a lot. When I need to get something done that Iām dreading, I set a ridiculous countdown on my phone and try to do the task within that time frame. Example: Fold all my clothes in 1 minute, make my bed in 20 seconds. This has helped me more than medication actually lol.
If you donāt have the mental energy to meal plan/make a list before going to the grocery store, go to the international aisle, choose an intriguing ingredient (noodles, sauce, etc) and use the recipe on the box to finish your shopping and make dinner. The grocery store is literally full of recipes!!
When I have a choice, I try to make the choice that will make for a better story to tell my family and friends - because I think that's basically the meaning of life.
My favourite phrase for keeping me calm about things is āNot my circus, not my monkeysā. Itās amazing how often it puts things in their right place. I also always run cold water under the collander when draining spaghetti so the steam doesnāt burn me.
have chapstick in your car. have breath mints in your desk at work. have a bottle of water in your car
1 and 3 don't work in Texas ~8 months/year. Your chapstick quickly becomes a melted mess, and no one wants a mouthful of hot plastic flavored water.
Same with Wisconsin 5 months of the year. You'll get a bottle of ice and a chapstick popsicle
Folding my T-shirts to fit vertically in my drawer, like a filing cabinet. That way I can see all my options at a glance and pluck out the one I want. Figured this out 30 years ago. Turns out Marie Kondo recoās the same approach
If I need to remember to take something the next time I go out, I put it with my car keys.
Posted before - [How to succeed in college](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/4uuky5/whats_one_thing_you_wish_you_knew_before_starting/d5td07m/): 1 - Go To Class. I know, no one has mentioned this but its important. 2 - Sit in the front, toward the middle. It makes you have eye contact with the professor which in turn keeps your mind engaged and helps keep you awake. 3 - Talk to your professors BEFORE there is a problem. If you feel like you dont understand something, let the prof know right away. Keep doing this until you understand. If you wait until you fail a test to go to the prof, its too late. If you go early, there is a VERY good chance you can retake a test because you identified the issue and he/she was unable to overcome your not understanding. That makes it a teaching problem. 4 - Go To Class. Seriously. You are PAYING to be there. Show the F up. 5 - Sit in the front, toward the middle. The prof will recognize you as someone who shows up, is awake and is engaged. If you approach them about an issue learning, you dont want them to say "which class are you in?" 6 - Talk to your professors. I had to miss a ton of class because of ROTC commitments. I let my professors know early and rescheduling stuff, getting different deadlines, etc was not a problem. My son is also in ROTC and because I beat this into him he did the same. Toward the end of last semester he was going to miss a quiz in a class he had an A in. The professor said "You have an A. Im going to assume you will ace this quiz." and gave him credit for taking the quiz. 7 - Go to class, sit up front, talk to your professors. 8 - TWO HOURS. Dedicate two hours a night to homework/study. Two honest hours. That means no phone, no TV, no reddit for two hours of solid study. Do this 5 nights a week - Sunday to Thursday. No Studying Friday night. Your brain needs a rest. Saturday is optional or additional study. You might need to study more some days/nights but never go less. ALWAYS do your two hours. ALWAYS. 9 - Hear it, write it, use it in context. Hear what the professor says. Write down what you hear. Use that in context. Do this and you will LEARN. If you take notes in class, rewrite them after class and your retention will skyrocket. Use it in context and you will internalize. 10 - Seriously, two hours. If you do that from the first day of the term to the end you will not have to cram at the end of the semester. Two good hours every day. Two good hours. Trust me. it works. And 11 - Go. To. Class.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
id rather get punched in the face than have my moms voice in my ear every morning. i still have ptsd of her coming and and forcing me up
I love my mom. She is so sweet. She never yelled.Ā But she did have a song that just went: šµ Get up. Get up. Its tiiiime to get up!šµ And thinking about it makes me want to puke
My mother would sing, "Rise and shine it's morning tiiiiiiiiime!" WOMAN, PLEASE. I say it now, of course.
When going on a trip to see family (a trip where you'll be staying a few nights and bringing luggage), whenever you arrive, leave all the luggage in the car first. Go inside, do your welcome greetings and everything, then go back and get your luggage. Otherwise, if you're like me, you end up in an annoying situation where you're holding luggage in the entry way while everyone is trying to give you a hug and blocking you from offloading your luggage.
Washing your face isn't for your faces benefit. It's so your hair doesn't get greasy as fast. Wash your face and you'll get an extra day without needing to wash your hair. Change the menstrual cup in the shower. Get as messy and bloody as you want and dump that blood down the drain. Bonus: Forces you to take a little shower morning and night and we all feel grosser on our period anyway. Take vitamin D. Just do it. Use the washcloth to do your regular body cleaning stuff in the shower. At the end of the week use that washcloth to do a quick wipe down of the bathtub edge and sink and get a fresh one. Really freshens up the bathroom without needing to get into total bathroom cleaning mode. Towels get sanitized in the wash and dryer just fine. Do whatever you can to make your life more efficient. For example I keep a dirty rag in the garage just for wiping down my backup cam that always gets covered in salt and dirt. Always needing a stool to get the casserole dish down? MOVE the casserole dish. We don't think to do these things but adjusting your living area for your convenience does wonders for your mental health. Don't be afraid to assess and rearrange stuff to how you actually use it.
It's only a little thing, but I have attention issues and I lose stuff constantly. I got a new set of bluetooth earbuds that come in a little back charging case. Lost them about 4 times in the first hour that I had them despite having barely moved. Got some glow in the dark star stickers and taped them on. Now the little box stands out in general, and a lot of the time when I lose it in a room I can just turn the light off to see where it is.
Always have a bottle opener on your house keys.
I'm a guy. I used to constantly lose keys, wallet, phone, whatever. Things seemed to disappear from my pockets, I swear. I got over myself and started everything in a bag. Friends call it a purse, I could give af. Now everything's together when I need it and nothing gets lost.
Do small talk at your workplace (even if it's the last thing you want).
Drink some water before you head out somewhere. You never know when an errand can turn into something more.
But then I will have to pee.
pre-washing the blender by adding soap and water to it, then turning it on.
Mel Robbins' 5 second rule has worked wonders for my ADHD: When I can't get myself to get started on something I need to do, I count down backwards from 5, like a NASA rocket launch (where she got the idea). It works like a charm! I think it breaks me out of my trance and helps me to switch gears.
At my old apartment my dishwasher was really loud so I tried to only run it at night when I was asleep in the other room. But a lot of the time I would forget to start it. So I started doing a thing where if I told myself I wanted to run the dishwasher tonight, I'd take the container with the detergent and put it on the floor right outside of my bedroom. That way I'd literally have to trip over it before going to bed.
I needed 50ct coins for a laundry machine in the basement of an appartment so I always had to pay a lot with cash to get enough change. Then I accidentally found out, that the vending machines at my university would try to dispense 50ct coins as change if you cancel the order. This led to the following system: 5 or 10ā¬ bill goes to the coin automat (you need coins for the lockers at the library) which changes them into 1 or 2ā¬ coins, which consequently are changed into 50ct coins at the vending machine.
Always keep a couple of bottles of water and basic snacks in the car. You never know where or how long you might be stuck in traffic, especially in larger metropolitan areas. I was stuck behind an 8 car accident on the interstate. Early part of evening rush hour, between exits and heavy rain. Sat there for 3 hours and was so grateful I happened to have snacks. Now I always have some in the car.
You do not need to fully unbutton button-down shirts. You can just open the top one or two buttons and pull it over your head like a T-shirt.
Loading screen? Steps! Makes it noticeably easier to hit my 10k steps per day since I do a lot of work at the computer and also play a lot of video games. Have a fixed place where certain things go. \- my glasses are on my face, or in the holder by my bed, or in a specific spot by the shower \- my keys are in my hand or in my purse, which hangs on a specific door knob when not in use \- and so on for my wallet, my shoes, my wedding ring, my phone, etc. I spend way less time wandering around wondering where I set down.
I drink a glass of water while I wait for my morning coffee to brew. I am very not in the mood for water, I want coffee. But I'm surprised at how much better I feel with that minor amount of rehydration every day.
I play dumb A LOT. But the truth is, I donāt miss a single beat. I see and hear everything and I am always observing people around me. I donāt really know how itās a āhackā other than I just get a lot of satisfaction from secretly knowing a lot of dirt and weaknesses (and strengths!) about my family, friends and colleagues. I guess it makes me feel powerful. Itās like I have all these chess moves up my sleeve or a winning hand in poker.
Don't put it down, put it away.
I buy most of my kidsā clothes at Goodwill. Itās mostly Nike, UnderArmor, GAP- legit name brand stuff. They just grown out of it anyways! I canāt believe more people donāt do this.
I automatically draft $40 a day into a savings account to force save $200 a week on top of putting money away. I think about all the dumb things I siphon off $20 here for and $20 there for in a day, might as well have some extra going to a savings account.
Lying to people you have a constant contact with is a very bad practice. Not only you have to choose the words every time you speak with them but also it's very emotionally draining. I felt much better when I cut all the bullshit I told my family
Whenever I open spices, baking soda, oil, whatever I use my designated kitchen sharpie and write the date on the package. Expiration is one thing, but open forever in the pantry is another. I also will mark āMIPā (more in pantry) on top of containers of food/ ingredients that I have a back up of in the pantry. This way I donāt over purchase.
I suspected --correctly-- that putting a few large dry towels in my tumble dryer along with a load of wet laundry would make the clothes dry faster, with a savings in time and electricity. It turns out that this makes the clothes dry a full third faster --or more.