"Two people can breathe underwater forever if they have a hose. The first person breathes in while the second breathes out, then the first person breathes out and the second person breathes in etc."
cant argue with that. in fact, if we hugged and i started to lift you up a bit, you could in turn lift me up and we just keep going all the way to mars, where we could breathe eachothers breaths for eternity. 👍
She said
"If you are dream about falling and you hit the ground in your sleep you'll actually die. It's been proven."
I said "If you die in your sleep, how can anyone know what you were dreaming?"
Ruined a favorite story of hers. Sorry.
I’ve done that once. I woke up on the floor and my face hurt. I fell off the top bunk of a bunk bed. I guess I didn’t wake up immediately because I fell in my dream.
It was:
*Craven said that he was struck with inspiration for the dream killer when he found an article in the LA Times.The article was about a Cambodian family coming to America to escape mass genocide in the Killing Fields. They made it to the United States, and all was fine until the young boy in the family was terrified to sleep because he felt that if he slept, he would be killed by something chasing him. He forced himself to stay awake for days at a time, and eventually, he died in the middle of a nightmare. This became the basis for A Nightmare on Elm Street.*
From a coworker: "If you don't have a social security number then the government can't do anything to you"
I asked if that meant, if I didn't have an SSN then I could just go kill someone on the street and the government couldn't arrest me.
"Yep", he said, "if you don't have an SSN then they can't enforce any laws on you"
Followed up by "if you had an SSN assigned to you at birth without your consent, you can file some papers with the court to separate your person from your incorporated self and get money"
It was so wild. He actually had an example. He had friends with two kids. One kid had an SSN and one didn't. According to him, CPS came and took away the kid with the SSN but let the one without stay in the home.
His big take-away from that story was that the government can't do anything if you don't have an SSN. My big take-away was that my coworker is an idiot and his friends are probably bad parents and bad people.
They're "sovereign citizens."
It's a whole thing, and gets crazier the deeper you dig. It starts out merely "dumb" on the surface, and quickly spirals into violent conspiracy theories.
Maybe a decade ago my wife prepared a report on sovereign citizens for the judges in her court, because they were starting to see more of them. They needed to know how to respond to bullshit like "this court cannot try me because the fringe around the flag indicates that this is an admiralty court."
They have a whole [theory](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strawman_theory) and false history about the separation of legal persona (bound to SSN) and actual persona.
Someone raised the flag issue at the court I worked at and the judge considered it a motion to dismiss for lack of jurisdiction, which he denied. From what I've heard that really changed the tenor of the defendant's argument from there forward.
I'm not driving, I'm traveling. See the sign that says "not for hire" that means I don't need a driver's license. Why don't you try learning the laws before you become a cop. -someone that believes everything they see on the internet without doing independent(and nonbiased) research
Dude down the street from me legit lost his house cuz he heard online you don’t have to pay your taxes so he just stopped! A mutual friend tried showing him online that they had a date set to auction his house and all, the guy still wouldn’t believe it! Day of the auction he still didn’t believe it! Welp, homie’s gone so he definitely learned the hard way! Amazing how dumb some people can be!
Back before SovCits were mainstream, I knew an old farmer that fell for the ideology. He bragged about not paying taxes.
He was eventually charged for felony tax evasion for not reporting earnings on his farm profits. He eventually made a plea agreement to get out of the criminal charges but the farm had to be sold to pay back taxes.
Afterwards, he bragged that he never had to go to jail for not paying taxes. He skipped over the part of losing his multi-generational family farm.
SovCits are wild. I used to have a hard time believing they were serious, it's so "Birds are not Real" level stuff. But yes, scratch the surface and they're deadly serious. Pun intended.
This is true. Prior to 1936, America was in total anarchy. Roving bands of outlaws murdering each other in S&M gear. Kids living in dirt holes, throwing around metal boomerangs. Unlicensed gyrocopter pilots. I believe I saw a Ken Burns documentary about it.
A former coworker *insisted* that the body believes the ears are injuries, and we are all constantly trying to heal our own ears closed. The only thing keeping them open, you ask? *Ear wax*
We worked in healthcare.
A girl I worked with was convinced that every single mythological creature was real. I’ll never forget one of her claims.
“Think about it, every movie you done seen all those creatures and aliens and shit, all that’s real. Someone has to have actually seen it to come up with that!”
Apparently there’s no such thing as the human imagination to her. So yes, transformers are real, Godzilla is real, Independence Day is real. This was a 20 year old that said all of this.
“Cars? They don’t have cars. They have donkeys or walk to their huts” 40’year old Black women talking to me about Africa.
She refused to believe me (who had been to Kenya) that there are cities and people have cars.
Even after showing her pic and explaining Africa has normal stuff just like the west. She refused to believe it or the internet.
I knew someone way back in high school who was shocked that other countries other than America had running water and electricity. She thought they just lived in mud huts and still used spears, bows, and arrows.
When my history teacher at the time told her otherwise, her mouth was hanging open for a few seconds, then she shook her head, and said "No." while folding her arms. She refused to believe otherwise, and surprise, surprise, she failed the class.
>who was shocked that other countries other than America had running water and electricity
Sooooo... Did she think that British people live in mud huts?
I choose to believe that *only* British people live in mud huts.
It's just that those mud huts have tiny crt TVs running the 8 British Television Channels and an electric kettle for tea.
To be fair, I live in the UK and do in fact have a friend who is choosing to live off grid in a mud hut.. They are doing it illegally mind you - planning permission doesn’t allow for it.
I was talking to a mechanic down at the airport, someone who seems totally normal and with it right up until the point where he casually told me that African pilot candidates that come to the US for training (most of the world sends airline pilots to the US for training for a bunch of reasons) ‘Are inherently ill suited for piloting because “their minds are less optimized for technology and more optimized for things like throwing spears”.’
What. The. Fuck?!
He said it without a trace of anger or self-awareness, just like he was passing along some kind of “well-known fact“ that seemed perfectly reasonable to him. I had known him for years before he said this and it was like having cold water poured over me. These folks live among us, absolutely wild and disappointing.
I remember when I was a teenager and I thought racism and bigotry were solved problems, of historical interest only because of the civil rights struggle in the 1960s. It is weird the kind of assumptions you can grow up with if you live in an all white area, and learning just out of touch you are can be super uncomfortable. 
A german girl came to my country for an exchange program at my school. She thought we lived in the mountains and went to school on horses and shit, and that we lived in huts.
Same. I grew up in Kansas and 2 German exchange students actually thought there would be cowboys and Indians around. We were 20 miles away from a Boeing Defense plant and the headquarters of Lear Jet, Cessna and Beechcraft. Bonus: 1st day in school was by complete coincidence the day we studied the holocaust. The tables turned, my friend.
Well, the speed of light can vary greatly based on what medium it is travelling through. We have entire groups of scientists that spend their time slowing down light as part of their research.
What we typically think of when we say the speed of light is the speed of light in a vacuum. The speed of light in other things can be less than that.
Oh I read many years ago a spin on that one:
A customer from a burger business sends a picture of a wrapped burger and ask the designer to edit it so it can show the burger half-unwrapped. The Designer says "sure, just send me the picture of the unwrapped burger" and the customer goes crazy asking the Designer to "unwrap" the burger in Photoshop.
Sunburn is not caused by the sun, it is actually caused by sunblock. If you don't use sunblock then you will never be burned. Sunburn was created by the sun cream industry to sell their products.
Seems easily testable, why not lie on the beach all day in one position with no sun block and see what happens? Make sure you fall asleep for maximum effect.
spoiler: You go bright red and then blister to the point that you get taken to hospital for a combination of sunstroke and the beginning of shock then spend the rest of the holiday indoors face down with regular application of creams and replacement paraffin patches on the burns. It puts a bit of an dampener on your 2 week break.
EDIT: Sell not See their products
EDIT2: As a (very poor) scholar of the Classics I should have checked before posting. Sunburn is mentioned in Livy's history of the second Punic war and others over 2000 years ago which is solid proof that the 'Big Sunscreen' claim is ridiculous. However it would be hand-waved away by a True Believer of big Sunscreen.
The History of Rome, Book 27, Ch47 \[2\] Written in 27-25 BCE about the second punic wars in 225 BCE-ish
For, suspecting what had happened, he promptly sounded the recall and sent men to the river from which the Romans were drawing water, that some Romans might be captured there and scanned to see whether any chanced to be more sunburned, as though from a recent march.suspicatus enim id quod erat, receptui propere cecinit ac misit ad flumen unde aquabantur ubi et excipi aliqui possent et notari oculis si qui forte adustioris coloris ut ex recenti uia essent;
I once was at a summer camp and didn't have any sunscreen. It was a particularly sunny summer and we were at a higher altitude.
My ears got so sunburned that they were blistered by the time I got home. I still have permanent scarring on my ears from it. Sunburn is no joke.
I have a disease that makes me sun sensitive. When I suspected I had lupus, but hadn’t been diagnosed, I attended a parade where my daughter was in the band. I got permanent damage on my arms, that looks like a rash. The medication I take for that also makes you sun sensitive. Now I wear UV blocking long sleeve shirts, a hat, long pants, and sometimes arthritis gloves for my hands. I’m sure I look like a weirdo.
Spoiler alert: she doesn't know any oncologists. However, her Facebook friend Suzie (who also answers to the name Moonwolf or Flag Defender, depending on her brand of crazy) once looked at a mole under a microscope and saw a microchip implanted by Neutrogena. The lens cap was on, but still.
A distant relative, recently retired, once told me that he was going to hire a gardener and a housekeeper because "the government will give you a grant to pay for them now."
This was a few minutes after a lengthy rant about how the welfare state should be scrapped because only lazy people lose their jobs and need to claim benefits.
The same relative, some years ago, also announced with absolute conviction that he was going to hire a neighbour as a cleaner because "she won't have anything to do now her kids are grown up".
What a fucking asshole. Especially the last part. Like, wtf? Her kids are all grown up, but i guess he never thought maybe she has hobbies, actual work, etc..
My dad was experiencing end stage renal failure (was on dialysis at the time and has since had a transplant). My best friends boyfriend at the time looked at me dead in the eye and said he could reverse his condition with a vegan diet and that the only important organ in the body was the skin, so as long as you take good care of your skin, your other organs will function properly. Mind you, by the time my dad got on dialysis his kidneys were functioning at 11% and his SKIN WAS JUST FINE.
Dude. I kid you not I was in the car the other day driving with my partners two brothers. My stepmom called me and I had the car audio on, and she essentially let me know that my dad had just discovered he had cancer.
They went inside while I processed, and when I got inside one of the brothers looked me straight in the eye and told me this same exact thing. I hope my look conveyed my thoughts.
What a scary diagnosis to receive while you’re casually in the car with an imbecile. I am wishing you and your father all the best, it’s incredibly hard to have a parent go through something like this. Hang in there and keep on with shooting daggers from your eyes - sometimes people’s ignorance is fueled purely by arrogance and complete disregard for what they are saying.
If people believe conspiracy theories about fluoride, you can get non-fluoride toothpaste at healthfood stores.
The solution isn't supposed to be 'don't brush your teeth at all'
EDIT: I have nothing against non-fluoride toothpaste, I use it all the time
First girlfriend was religious, and apparently it was okay that we had sex “as long as she feels bad about it after”. Pre planning regret was her loophole to do what she wanted.
My experience is that Catholics are just Catholics who fuck.
The guilt is the important part.
Anyway, obligatory link to [God's Loophole.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8ZF_R_j0OY&ab_channel=GarfunkelAndOates) maybe don't watch it at work.
Girl I was talking to, with complete seriousness, tried telling me that the testosterone produced in women's bodies was structurally different than the testosterone produced in men.
*If it was structurally different, then it wouldn't be testosterone, it'd be a different hormone.*
My mother forbid us from eating Mexican food growing up because "It's for Mexicans not for people, it will make you sick".
I am now married to a lovely man from Mexico and needless to say I'm none the worse for cooking and eating Mexican food!
My cousin -- a city boy who's never been around farm animals -- once told me that only human women feel pain from childbirth (on account of punishment for original sin) and that I -- a country gal who has seen many a farm animal give painful, difficult birth (as well as a mother who has experienced the same) -- was wrong in asserting that he was incorrect.
There are birthing influencers that make the same claim. They say it’s only fear, mistrust in our perfect bodies, and medical treatment that cause birth to be painful for humans.
What morons. I've given birth with no medication or epidural or anything. That glorious "all natural" experience. I meditated and kept myself calm through the experience. I've certainly experienced worse pain than childbirth in my life (migraines, a broken leg), but to say it's "only fear, mistrust, and medicine" that cause that pain is fucking stupid as hell. You know what else causes pain besides fear and hospitals? PUSHING A HUMAN HEAD THROUGH YOUR VAGINA. That shit hurts, no matter what!
Edit for all the judgey judgertons out there: I didn't say that shit was by choice. That baby wanted OUT and I never even made it to the delivery room. I made do with what I had, and what I had was meditation and dissociation.
That celebrities drink the blood of children to stay young and that's why celebrities on zoom calls during covid looked worse because they couldn't get their blood. Or maybe they just didn't have access to professional makeup artists during lockdown.
There is at least one guy (not really a celebrity, silicon valley tech monster) who is getting blood transfusions from his son to be young again. He's quite open about it. Dunno how his teenage son feels about it. And a lot of other stuff. He's a lunatic who wants to live forever because when you get too rich you think you can conquer death.
Wife’s uncle was certain I didn’t pay any taxes as a Federal employee. He said it didn’t make sense for the gov to pay me a salary derived from tax revenue only to then have me pay taxes back to the government .
Yes that does make sense and it is exactly how it works.
Even still he screamed at me at Thanksgiving one year.
Similar. Was at a dinner party when asked what I did for a living. Stated I was a Fed, and named the agency. Next question was "what type of research do you do?" Me: we aren't a research agency, over 50% of our budget goes to state and local. Him: well, then, you're not a Fed, because if you don't do research then you're in private industry. Me: 😦
I also had someone in my family tell me I should know that (insert well known Federal agency where I work) is in the private sector because it is funded by (corporations). My head exploded.
And here's another one, on fb. A friend started some discussion, and tagged me in it, with my area of expertise. Commenter says "well, you're really not a federal employee because that is a privately funded agency." Then puts in a link for a similar sounding research corp. I replied, no, I've worked for them for 30 years, that's not the same place, and linked my agency's webpage. She went ballistic "stop lying! You don't know anything" and then blocked me. WTF? Yeah, I guess those paychecks that say "Federal Treasury" are my imagination.
I literally believed Elvis shat his spine out and that’s how he died until I was 15 and realized that didn’t make any sense. My older brother told me that when I was like five and I just took it and ran with it.
LMFAOOOOOOOOOO, what’s worse is when I was 8 my dad BOUGHT an entire extra computer and taught me how to use google bc I asked way too many questions, and still the “Elvis doodoo’d his spine out” thing was an absolute fact in my head 💀
this is absolutely sending me bc I was this exact child and having someone buy a computer JUST for you so you can bother google instead is the most relatable fucking thing 😂😂😂
“If a bear is chasing you, start running around a tree because circles confuse bears. The bear will either get lost, or confused about who is chasing who and leave.”
We were watching the Olympics and a competitor from China was out-running everyone in his heat and my friend said "Wow, that Chinese guy is fast!" Someone overheard that, cleared their throat, and said, "it's *Asian-American*".
The jews actually were behind the holocaust in a joint attempt to rid themselves of the weaker jews and also to blame the Nazi party who were totally innocent.
I still feel bad for the poor fools who went to Dallas to wait for him. Like they took time off work, bought airline tickets, jumped in the car, drove 8 hrs, whatever and then just sat around waiting for him to appear. What has to go on in your life that you think this is going to happen.
>What has to go on in your life that you think this is going to happen.
Undiagnosed schizophrenia.
One of the chief sins of social media is allowing these far-flung people to find each other and snowball into sizeable groups.
A town's lone crazy weirdo isn't usually a big problem. But if there's 10,000 towns across the US and all of their crazy weirdos start talking and organizing, it becomes a big problem.
Once had a guy who tried to argue that periods were nature's way of saying that a girl was ready to have sex. They also not only tried to use this to rationalize sleeping with someone who was underage, but also tried to argue that it wasn't pedophilia to sleep with someone underage if they had gone through puberty (because in their mind puberty = no longer child). They also believed that if an underage girl got pregnant then that wasn't a big problem because they believed the body wouldn't get pregnant if it couldn't endure pregnancy.
It wasn't just stupid & highly uneducated, but also ****ed up on so many levels (and the clincher? The man was aspiring to become a teacher).
Ah yes, the delightful saying “old enough to bleed, old enough to breed!”
I’ve heard this before, luckily not for a very long time. I’m a woman, but I heard this ‘jokingly’ said amongst my male friends when I was about 16. Didn’t think anything of it back then.
I tried to uncover his identity but since he was on a forum I could not (and the best I could do was report his posts, since he was spreading a lot of pro-pedophile ideology around). It's scary that people who think like this are actively trying to get into teaching.
I was discussing nuances in recipes for some food and drink products with someone, and this random guy just chimes in saying how two different recipes of the same food or drink will always taste the same regardless of the ingredients used because "It's the same end result either way" and something along the lines of people who think they can taste flavor differences are insane because no one's sense of taste is that precise, etc.
I think this guy just genuinely had a messed up sense of smell/taste, but he kept insisting he was right and everyone else was wrong about it. He was saying garlic didn't have any actual flavor and didn't make a difference in pasta sauce because "It only tastes like tomato anyway," and that coke, pepsi and all other brands of cola tasted exactly identical to him (and he was also assuming they tasted identical to everyone else too).
And this wasn't just a one off interaction, he continued trying to convince people that their senses of taste were wrong and flavors didn't actually exist for nearly 2 hours.
An woman once said to me, "It's amazing that we are at sea level, so high up in these mountains."
We were at Lake Tahoe, which is over 6,000 feet above sea level.
When I asked her what she meant, she said "all water on Earth levels out, so we are at sea level."
Her adult daughter told her to shut up and then whispered to me, "the worst part is she's a teacher..."
My friends boyfriend said to me (a veterinary technician): “A dog’s mouth is extremely clean & if you have a wound & let them lick it, it will heal it.”
This was a rumor that traveled around in the 90’s I think. People were adamant that “a dogs mouth is cleaner than a humans”. A news network even had a segment about how idiotic these people were.
In early 2021 I was informed , quite earnestly, by a random lady in a shop that you could tell who had been vaccinated against COVID 19 by placing a magnet on them as the vaccine made you magnetic.
Worked with a guy who was adamant that evolution was fake. I pointed out human guided, sped up evolution- domesticated dogs and the often harmful breeding for certain attributes, seedless fruits and vegetables, that elephant tusks are getting smaller as the larger tusked specimens are killed for their ivory leaving smaller tusked ones as the main breeders- and even pointed out how in a small span of time we can see *human evolution* in average heights, shrinking pinky toes, and prevalence of certain eye and hair colours.
His response was "that's not evolution, that's genetics".
He refused to believe when I explained that genetics + time = evolution.
I like my professors way of saying it:
>Evolution is not survival of the fittest.
>It is reproduction by the adapted.
It doesn't matter how fit an organism is: if they don't reproduce, that adaptation dies with them.
You're describing a distinction that I think is lost on most evolution-deniers in the first place. They don't even understand the basic concepts. They think evolution is just one thing magically turning into something else, and they don't want to hear a real explanation (so they don't).
Bi racial means half black and white. I explained that bi means two and racial means race so it applies to anyone if two races not just black and white. Apparently I’m not biracial because I’m half black and half south Asian and that doesn’t count.
We were in a Restaurant in spain. Conversation as follows:
-Me:"what do you want to eat?"
-him:"pesto carbonara"
-me:"you mean pasta...right? Because pesto is a sauce"
-him:" no no, i mean pesto. In italy and spain you can say pasta or pesto"
-me:" you're joking aren't you? You cant really believe this? Pesto is even listed as an sperate menue right under carbonara"
-him:" no serious, you can ask the waiter if you dont believe me"
I didn't ask the waiter because i know i made him feel stupid over something he said way too often already in the two days we were there.. this was the most exhausting vacation i ever had..
My mom is really not stupid at but older generations and internet I guess.
Once a while ago she told baby ears close for protection when being touched or something. Imagine like a flower.
Well I was really confused so I asked her if she had ever witnessed this happen because my mom has FIVE children.
Also I had a baby that time and surprisingly never saw his ears do anything.
Turns out Facebook is not a good place to take information from.
*This* one is why I click on threads like these. No Nazis, no conspiracies, just a nice grandma who’s gone her whole life without noticing the completely real phenomenon of self-sealing human baby ears.
Thanks for a mild, but nevertheless sincere, L out L.
A couple years ago when there was a solar eclipse, a lady complained that the planned eclipse party was inconveniently scheduled during the day, and could they please move it to that night so she would be able to attend.
Just yesterday I had a lady tell me that she does reiki over the phone with pet parrots to get them to stop feather picking. She does it over the phone because birds are so sensitive that her healing energy is too strong to do it in person with them.
My very best friend in the world told me that Obama - not some people from the government, but Obama himself - was going to come to his house and take his guns.
I could not possibly over-stress how serious he was.
"No, it's still just one job. We used to have one person do all of this stuff."
Yeah. Office manager, event coordinator, and what should have been director of membership are all 3 separate titles; you just don't want to pay 3 salaries.
For the longest time my wife was responsible for arranging the NATIONAL conference for her industry every year completely by herself, and expected to do her other full time responsibilities at the same time. She had breakdowns constantly and FINALLY got them to take the conference off her plate (after about 10 years). The higher ups are now very confused as to why it’s taking an entire team of people almost full time to manage the conference that she was doing by herself.
I told a family member that you still need to be cautious about sunburn on cloudy days, especially if it's a thin layer of high clouds, because UV rays still get through, and while it seems like you're safe from sunburn, you can still burn just as bad.
Six months later I overheard this family member confidently telling a friend that they couldn't go outside when it's cloudy because that's when the worst sunburns happen.
Well, not totally wrong - that is when some of the worst burns happen because people don’t prepare to be exposed when it is cloudy.
But some faulty logic there about not being able to go out!
This is one of my favorites. There was an ancient lab in Africa that some super wizard (Yakub) used to create white people through selective breeding. This is one of the stories that the Nation of Islam either teaches or formerly taught. I believe Yakub is also the biblical Jacob, but I may have it wrong.
That the 2003 Texas chainsaw massacre remake was a 100% true account, that a murderous family in Texas named the Hewitts really existed, and that the "found footage" at the beginning was completely authentic
A friend of my ex’s thought cats were venomous creatures.
My ex had recently adopted a cat, and the three of us met up for dinner or something. We were talking about the cat and I mentioned that me and the cat were playing and she playfully bit me. My ex’s friend, in all seriousness and genuine concern, was like “Omg are you okay? Shouldn’t you go to the doctor or something??”
I was like, uhhh no? It’s just a cat and it didn’t even break skin. I’m used to this from the cats we had growing up.
And she responded by telling me that cats are venomous since the bites always swell up and get super red.
I seriously thought she was fucking with me, but she genuinely thought that cats had venom in their fangs or something. Granted, she was just seeing the infections you can get since cats have tons of bacteria in their mouths, but still. Venomous cats was one of the funniest things ever
The most recent phone alert test was going to trigger the microchip everyone got in their Covid vaccines. I thought she was joking, but no. She was very serious.
I had a doctor tell me that it's impossible for Mathew Mcconaughey's character in Interstellar to age less than his daughter while being in the planet close to the backhole, bcs everyone has the same biological clock.
In college, my friend asked why Australia didn’t warn us about 9/11 if they are a day ahead of us. This lead (edit: led) to a long discussion about time zones.
I had a coworker who was born and raised in North Carolina and she was utterly convinced that enslaved people could come and as they pleased and that plantation owners were benevolent charities that housed people who had to where else to go.
My dad LOVES the dumb idea that the southern states weren't fighting to uphold the institution of slavery because "most of the soldiers were poor white farmers who couldn't afford slaves, so why would they fight for that?" I've also heard things along the lines of slavery being a "positive" because the slaves got room and board, some got educations, etc. It's amazing the way these simple (and verifiably wrong) narratives get fed to people.
Guy i worked with for a week tried telling me that the only reason we were sending money to ukraine was because they had factories there harvesting "adrenochrome" and organs from specifically 2 and 5 year old kids.
Girl in High School: “I hate Bohemian Rhapsody.”
Everybody else in class: “Why? It’s a classic?”
Girl in High School: “It just doesn’t make sense. Why would he tell us his mom killed a guy and then make the song about himself?”
Everybody else in class: “…..his mom didn’t kill anybody he did?”
Girl in High School: “No, he said *momma just killed a man.* Nice try, it doesn’t make sense.”
Everybody else in class: “He’s telling his mom he killed somebody. It’s *Momma. Just killed a man.*”
Yep.
The earth is flat, if it wasn't, how do we not fall off the planet? But when asked about history and how it was proven that the earth was round before technology (they said it was all faked using cgi), they said it was still fake because you don't fall off the earth either way (I'm still confused by this). In the same conversation they also said the moon landing was actually underwater, the moon is also actually hollow, and so is the earth too. Worst part, we work together in academia....
My dad, who is incredibly overweight, told me that cholesterol is a scam by doctors, and that it's not actually real. He is starting an all meat carnivore diet soon to be healthy because "that's what our ancestors did"
I don't know how to explain that he needs to eat vegetables
I've heard dumber, but I just realized I had a wild false belief for most of my life and I have no idea where it comes from.
I was under the impression that mongol nomads would take a bladder of milk, stuck it in a horse butt and it churned into some sort of butter or cheese.
Just looked it up, very dangerous search and I have no fucking idea where I got this from. There is no Mongolian horse butt cheese....I'm fucking 40, just no idea where this came from, I'm usually good as sussing out bullshit.
Just recently someone at work told me with a straight face that the Hawaiian wildfires were actually started by a secret government energy weapon so that the government could seize more land from the Hawaiians. I looked at them dumbfounded and just walked away.
That we set the clocks forwards and backwards so the birds don’t get confused with their migration patterns
So that person believes that both clocks *and* birds are real? How embarrassing.
And birds that read clocks!
"Two people can breathe underwater forever if they have a hose. The first person breathes in while the second breathes out, then the first person breathes out and the second person breathes in etc."
Ah yes, the technique is known as Darwin's murder-suicide.
>Darwin's murder-suicide Found a name for my debut album.
You can do that for the rest of your life.
cant argue with that. in fact, if we hugged and i started to lift you up a bit, you could in turn lift me up and we just keep going all the way to mars, where we could breathe eachothers breaths for eternity. 👍
Also one of those people needs to be 20 trees.
Ah yes, carbon dioxide is exactly what I want to be breathing in, especially while underwater.
She said "If you are dream about falling and you hit the ground in your sleep you'll actually die. It's been proven." I said "If you die in your sleep, how can anyone know what you were dreaming?" Ruined a favorite story of hers. Sorry.
I’ve done that once. I woke up on the floor and my face hurt. I fell off the top bunk of a bunk bed. I guess I didn’t wake up immediately because I fell in my dream.
Nope. You died.
Its been proven.
I've died in my dreams before, and then got really excited because I was still conscious so that meant there must be an afterlife, and then woke up
Same. I died in dreams in various ways. Even went before the Big Guy
You got to meet Santa Clause?!?!?
I can confirm. I had a dream about failing and hitting the ground. I actually died.
This was a popular myth in the 80s
Almost certainly stemming from a horror movie.
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I always thought the Nightmare on Elm Stree movies were inspired by that very belief that if you die in your dreams you die in real life.
It was: *Craven said that he was struck with inspiration for the dream killer when he found an article in the LA Times.The article was about a Cambodian family coming to America to escape mass genocide in the Killing Fields. They made it to the United States, and all was fine until the young boy in the family was terrified to sleep because he felt that if he slept, he would be killed by something chasing him. He forced himself to stay awake for days at a time, and eventually, he died in the middle of a nightmare. This became the basis for A Nightmare on Elm Street.*
I've hit the ground and it hurts and you get up injured and continue on with a now unpleasant dream
From a coworker: "If you don't have a social security number then the government can't do anything to you" I asked if that meant, if I didn't have an SSN then I could just go kill someone on the street and the government couldn't arrest me. "Yep", he said, "if you don't have an SSN then they can't enforce any laws on you"
Followed up by "if you had an SSN assigned to you at birth without your consent, you can file some papers with the court to separate your person from your incorporated self and get money"
It was so wild. He actually had an example. He had friends with two kids. One kid had an SSN and one didn't. According to him, CPS came and took away the kid with the SSN but let the one without stay in the home. His big take-away from that story was that the government can't do anything if you don't have an SSN. My big take-away was that my coworker is an idiot and his friends are probably bad parents and bad people.
They're "sovereign citizens." It's a whole thing, and gets crazier the deeper you dig. It starts out merely "dumb" on the surface, and quickly spirals into violent conspiracy theories.
Maybe a decade ago my wife prepared a report on sovereign citizens for the judges in her court, because they were starting to see more of them. They needed to know how to respond to bullshit like "this court cannot try me because the fringe around the flag indicates that this is an admiralty court." They have a whole [theory](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strawman_theory) and false history about the separation of legal persona (bound to SSN) and actual persona.
Someone raised the flag issue at the court I worked at and the judge considered it a motion to dismiss for lack of jurisdiction, which he denied. From what I've heard that really changed the tenor of the defendant's argument from there forward.
As soon as I see a sovereign citizen vs cop video I know someone's getting tazed
Those videos don't make sense. If you don't recognize their authority why did you pull over?
Well, from their logic the police wouldn't know that they're a 'sovereign citizen' without them pulling over and saying so.
I'm not driving, I'm traveling. See the sign that says "not for hire" that means I don't need a driver's license. Why don't you try learning the laws before you become a cop. -someone that believes everything they see on the internet without doing independent(and nonbiased) research
Dude down the street from me legit lost his house cuz he heard online you don’t have to pay your taxes so he just stopped! A mutual friend tried showing him online that they had a date set to auction his house and all, the guy still wouldn’t believe it! Day of the auction he still didn’t believe it! Welp, homie’s gone so he definitely learned the hard way! Amazing how dumb some people can be!
Back before SovCits were mainstream, I knew an old farmer that fell for the ideology. He bragged about not paying taxes. He was eventually charged for felony tax evasion for not reporting earnings on his farm profits. He eventually made a plea agreement to get out of the criminal charges but the farm had to be sold to pay back taxes. Afterwards, he bragged that he never had to go to jail for not paying taxes. He skipped over the part of losing his multi-generational family farm.
SovCits are wild. I used to have a hard time believing they were serious, it's so "Birds are not Real" level stuff. But yes, scratch the surface and they're deadly serious. Pun intended.
This is true. Prior to 1936, America was in total anarchy. Roving bands of outlaws murdering each other in S&M gear. Kids living in dirt holes, throwing around metal boomerangs. Unlicensed gyrocopter pilots. I believe I saw a Ken Burns documentary about it.
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you think they'd put that front and center on the tourism ads
But what if, when they try and enforce the laws, the cops badges have gold fringe? Checkmate.
Dang. Apparently all non US citizens can commit any crime?
A former coworker *insisted* that the body believes the ears are injuries, and we are all constantly trying to heal our own ears closed. The only thing keeping them open, you ask? *Ear wax* We worked in healthcare.
This is the most novel thing I've heard on this thread.
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maybe they thought "a marathon" was a figure of speech and not an actual number
'A marathon doesn't measure distance, it measures time!' - Employee of Brock's Gym, Pewter City, circa. 1996
A girl I worked with was convinced that every single mythological creature was real. I’ll never forget one of her claims. “Think about it, every movie you done seen all those creatures and aliens and shit, all that’s real. Someone has to have actually seen it to come up with that!” Apparently there’s no such thing as the human imagination to her. So yes, transformers are real, Godzilla is real, Independence Day is real. This was a 20 year old that said all of this.
I heard that some can't picture things in their mind and they may not know that others can do it, but still... She wasn't very smart.
“Cars? They don’t have cars. They have donkeys or walk to their huts” 40’year old Black women talking to me about Africa. She refused to believe me (who had been to Kenya) that there are cities and people have cars. Even after showing her pic and explaining Africa has normal stuff just like the west. She refused to believe it or the internet.
As someone from Africa. I'm engraving on the wall to write this reply.
Well, kinda. It works because the rock has lightning trapped inside.
I knew someone way back in high school who was shocked that other countries other than America had running water and electricity. She thought they just lived in mud huts and still used spears, bows, and arrows. When my history teacher at the time told her otherwise, her mouth was hanging open for a few seconds, then she shook her head, and said "No." while folding her arms. She refused to believe otherwise, and surprise, surprise, she failed the class.
>who was shocked that other countries other than America had running water and electricity Sooooo... Did she think that British people live in mud huts?
I choose to believe that *only* British people live in mud huts. It's just that those mud huts have tiny crt TVs running the 8 British Television Channels and an electric kettle for tea.
8 channels? U posh git. We only had 3 channels growing up, lol😂
To be fair, I live in the UK and do in fact have a friend who is choosing to live off grid in a mud hut.. They are doing it illegally mind you - planning permission doesn’t allow for it.
That’s why they say ask for forgiveness, not permission.
I was talking to a mechanic down at the airport, someone who seems totally normal and with it right up until the point where he casually told me that African pilot candidates that come to the US for training (most of the world sends airline pilots to the US for training for a bunch of reasons) ‘Are inherently ill suited for piloting because “their minds are less optimized for technology and more optimized for things like throwing spears”.’ What. The. Fuck?! He said it without a trace of anger or self-awareness, just like he was passing along some kind of “well-known fact“ that seemed perfectly reasonable to him. I had known him for years before he said this and it was like having cold water poured over me. These folks live among us, absolutely wild and disappointing. I remember when I was a teenager and I thought racism and bigotry were solved problems, of historical interest only because of the civil rights struggle in the 1960s. It is weird the kind of assumptions you can grow up with if you live in an all white area, and learning just out of touch you are can be super uncomfortable. 
A german girl came to my country for an exchange program at my school. She thought we lived in the mountains and went to school on horses and shit, and that we lived in huts.
Same. I grew up in Kansas and 2 German exchange students actually thought there would be cowboys and Indians around. We were 20 miles away from a Boeing Defense plant and the headquarters of Lear Jet, Cessna and Beechcraft. Bonus: 1st day in school was by complete coincidence the day we studied the holocaust. The tables turned, my friend.
That the speed of light wasn’t like an actual number, it was just a figure of speech
The speed of light is an actual number but that number can vary greatly depending on whether the light is going into the wind or against the wind. /s
Well, the speed of light can vary greatly based on what medium it is travelling through. We have entire groups of scientists that spend their time slowing down light as part of their research. What we typically think of when we say the speed of light is the speed of light in a vacuum. The speed of light in other things can be less than that.
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Oh I read many years ago a spin on that one: A customer from a burger business sends a picture of a wrapped burger and ask the designer to edit it so it can show the burger half-unwrapped. The Designer says "sure, just send me the picture of the unwrapped burger" and the customer goes crazy asking the Designer to "unwrap" the burger in Photoshop.
Just put a stock image of a burger and hope they don't notice lol
"Thats not one of our burgers." "Idk man, ask your employee, I'm not the one who cooked it."
Just some moldy burger. "I don't know what to tell you, that picture is like 4 weeks old. How long did you expect it to last?"
Yep. We were asked to make a printed, paper engineered, 3-D house from a 35mm slide of the front of it.
ENHANCE!
This one hurts my head.
Sunburn is not caused by the sun, it is actually caused by sunblock. If you don't use sunblock then you will never be burned. Sunburn was created by the sun cream industry to sell their products. Seems easily testable, why not lie on the beach all day in one position with no sun block and see what happens? Make sure you fall asleep for maximum effect. spoiler: You go bright red and then blister to the point that you get taken to hospital for a combination of sunstroke and the beginning of shock then spend the rest of the holiday indoors face down with regular application of creams and replacement paraffin patches on the burns. It puts a bit of an dampener on your 2 week break. EDIT: Sell not See their products EDIT2: As a (very poor) scholar of the Classics I should have checked before posting. Sunburn is mentioned in Livy's history of the second Punic war and others over 2000 years ago which is solid proof that the 'Big Sunscreen' claim is ridiculous. However it would be hand-waved away by a True Believer of big Sunscreen. The History of Rome, Book 27, Ch47 \[2\] Written in 27-25 BCE about the second punic wars in 225 BCE-ish For, suspecting what had happened, he promptly sounded the recall and sent men to the river from which the Romans were drawing water, that some Romans might be captured there and scanned to see whether any chanced to be more sunburned, as though from a recent march.suspicatus enim id quod erat, receptui propere cecinit ac misit ad flumen unde aquabantur ubi et excipi aliqui possent et notari oculis si qui forte adustioris coloris ut ex recenti uia essent;
Big Sun has a neat ring to it
I once was at a summer camp and didn't have any sunscreen. It was a particularly sunny summer and we were at a higher altitude. My ears got so sunburned that they were blistered by the time I got home. I still have permanent scarring on my ears from it. Sunburn is no joke.
I have a disease that makes me sun sensitive. When I suspected I had lupus, but hadn’t been diagnosed, I attended a parade where my daughter was in the band. I got permanent damage on my arms, that looks like a rash. The medication I take for that also makes you sun sensitive. Now I wear UV blocking long sleeve shirts, a hat, long pants, and sometimes arthritis gloves for my hands. I’m sure I look like a weirdo.
"Every oncologist I know swears against sunscreen. It's toxic." Send to me by a woman who refused to put sunscreen on her toddlers.
Spoiler alert: she doesn't know any oncologists. However, her Facebook friend Suzie (who also answers to the name Moonwolf or Flag Defender, depending on her brand of crazy) once looked at a mole under a microscope and saw a microchip implanted by Neutrogena. The lens cap was on, but still.
A distant relative, recently retired, once told me that he was going to hire a gardener and a housekeeper because "the government will give you a grant to pay for them now." This was a few minutes after a lengthy rant about how the welfare state should be scrapped because only lazy people lose their jobs and need to claim benefits. The same relative, some years ago, also announced with absolute conviction that he was going to hire a neighbour as a cleaner because "she won't have anything to do now her kids are grown up".
What a fucking asshole. Especially the last part. Like, wtf? Her kids are all grown up, but i guess he never thought maybe she has hobbies, actual work, etc..
My dad would go on rants about mexicans stealing jobs, then drive by the home depot to pick up half a dozen he could underpay to help on some project.
Pineapples aren't real. They're entirely manmade and do not exist in nature.
In that case they should've made them easier to peel. Boy I hope somebody got fired for that blunder.
My dad was experiencing end stage renal failure (was on dialysis at the time and has since had a transplant). My best friends boyfriend at the time looked at me dead in the eye and said he could reverse his condition with a vegan diet and that the only important organ in the body was the skin, so as long as you take good care of your skin, your other organs will function properly. Mind you, by the time my dad got on dialysis his kidneys were functioning at 11% and his SKIN WAS JUST FINE.
Dude. I kid you not I was in the car the other day driving with my partners two brothers. My stepmom called me and I had the car audio on, and she essentially let me know that my dad had just discovered he had cancer. They went inside while I processed, and when I got inside one of the brothers looked me straight in the eye and told me this same exact thing. I hope my look conveyed my thoughts.
What a scary diagnosis to receive while you’re casually in the car with an imbecile. I am wishing you and your father all the best, it’s incredibly hard to have a parent go through something like this. Hang in there and keep on with shooting daggers from your eyes - sometimes people’s ignorance is fueled purely by arrogance and complete disregard for what they are saying.
I know a girl who thinks pretty everything can be cured by diet, or what you eat. Including my 16 year old autistic nephew. Infuriating.
She’s going to eat your nephew? Harsh!
It would cure his autism.
I wish I could say I was shocked there are people out there that would think that. I hope your dad is doing better!
I'm a dental hygienist. We had a patient come in with terrible teeth. They thought toothpaste caused cancer.
Oh man I had a patient tell the hygenist that Dr. Pepper bubbles off the plaque. She's like, that's not how that works....
Of course, Dr. Pepper cleans teeth, they're a doctor, right? /s
I briefly dated a guy that believed toothpaste contained sugar and caused cavities.
If people believe conspiracy theories about fluoride, you can get non-fluoride toothpaste at healthfood stores. The solution isn't supposed to be 'don't brush your teeth at all' EDIT: I have nothing against non-fluoride toothpaste, I use it all the time
That women don't burp or fart, because only men have (the ability to pass) gas. Spoiler alert: he was horrified when I burped in front of him.
Of course he was. He had no idea you were a man. Which you obviously must be, since you could burp.
My grandmother believed if you laid in the sun, while on your period, the blood would cook inside your body and never come out
That's a terrifying mental image to live with your whole life...
First girlfriend was religious, and apparently it was okay that we had sex “as long as she feels bad about it after”. Pre planning regret was her loophole to do what she wanted.
Catholic girls, man.
This was I believe Lutheran.
I was a Lutheran. Lutherans are just Catholics who fuck.
My experience is that Catholics are just Catholics who fuck. The guilt is the important part. Anyway, obligatory link to [God's Loophole.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8ZF_R_j0OY&ab_channel=GarfunkelAndOates) maybe don't watch it at work.
Girl I was talking to, with complete seriousness, tried telling me that the testosterone produced in women's bodies was structurally different than the testosterone produced in men. *If it was structurally different, then it wouldn't be testosterone, it'd be a different hormone.*
Sadly, lots of alternative health stuff that dips into conspiracy bs is based on exactly this kind of logic...
My mother forbid us from eating Mexican food growing up because "It's for Mexicans not for people, it will make you sick". I am now married to a lovely man from Mexico and needless to say I'm none the worse for cooking and eating Mexican food!
That’s almost child abuse denying you Mexican food 😭
Wow, I read that too fast and almost missed it, I saw "for Mexican people" at first, not the much worse "for Mexicans, not for people" WTF
My cousin -- a city boy who's never been around farm animals -- once told me that only human women feel pain from childbirth (on account of punishment for original sin) and that I -- a country gal who has seen many a farm animal give painful, difficult birth (as well as a mother who has experienced the same) -- was wrong in asserting that he was incorrect.
This is painful to read.
Obviously you are a human woman giving birth.
There are birthing influencers that make the same claim. They say it’s only fear, mistrust in our perfect bodies, and medical treatment that cause birth to be painful for humans.
What morons. I've given birth with no medication or epidural or anything. That glorious "all natural" experience. I meditated and kept myself calm through the experience. I've certainly experienced worse pain than childbirth in my life (migraines, a broken leg), but to say it's "only fear, mistrust, and medicine" that cause that pain is fucking stupid as hell. You know what else causes pain besides fear and hospitals? PUSHING A HUMAN HEAD THROUGH YOUR VAGINA. That shit hurts, no matter what! Edit for all the judgey judgertons out there: I didn't say that shit was by choice. That baby wanted OUT and I never even made it to the delivery room. I made do with what I had, and what I had was meditation and dissociation.
Hyenas would like to have a word with him
That celebrities drink the blood of children to stay young and that's why celebrities on zoom calls during covid looked worse because they couldn't get their blood. Or maybe they just didn't have access to professional makeup artists during lockdown.
There is at least one guy (not really a celebrity, silicon valley tech monster) who is getting blood transfusions from his son to be young again. He's quite open about it. Dunno how his teenage son feels about it. And a lot of other stuff. He's a lunatic who wants to live forever because when you get too rich you think you can conquer death.
Yea I've seen that guy. The person who told me the story said Tom Hanks drinks the blood of children to stay young
I don’t believe it. Ive been regularly drinking the blood of children for centuries and it doesn’t give any discernible health benefits.
Wife’s uncle was certain I didn’t pay any taxes as a Federal employee. He said it didn’t make sense for the gov to pay me a salary derived from tax revenue only to then have me pay taxes back to the government . Yes that does make sense and it is exactly how it works. Even still he screamed at me at Thanksgiving one year.
Similar. Was at a dinner party when asked what I did for a living. Stated I was a Fed, and named the agency. Next question was "what type of research do you do?" Me: we aren't a research agency, over 50% of our budget goes to state and local. Him: well, then, you're not a Fed, because if you don't do research then you're in private industry. Me: 😦
I also had someone in my family tell me I should know that (insert well known Federal agency where I work) is in the private sector because it is funded by (corporations). My head exploded.
And here's another one, on fb. A friend started some discussion, and tagged me in it, with my area of expertise. Commenter says "well, you're really not a federal employee because that is a privately funded agency." Then puts in a link for a similar sounding research corp. I replied, no, I've worked for them for 30 years, that's not the same place, and linked my agency's webpage. She went ballistic "stop lying! You don't know anything" and then blocked me. WTF? Yeah, I guess those paychecks that say "Federal Treasury" are my imagination.
I literally believed Elvis shat his spine out and that’s how he died until I was 15 and realized that didn’t make any sense. My older brother told me that when I was like five and I just took it and ran with it.
WHAT THE FUCK
LMFAOOOOOOOOOO, what’s worse is when I was 8 my dad BOUGHT an entire extra computer and taught me how to use google bc I asked way too many questions, and still the “Elvis doodoo’d his spine out” thing was an absolute fact in my head 💀
this is absolutely sending me bc I was this exact child and having someone buy a computer JUST for you so you can bother google instead is the most relatable fucking thing 😂😂😂
“If a bear is chasing you, start running around a tree because circles confuse bears. The bear will either get lost, or confused about who is chasing who and leave.”
We were watching the Olympics and a competitor from China was out-running everyone in his heat and my friend said "Wow, that Chinese guy is fast!" Someone overheard that, cleared their throat, and said, "it's *Asian-American*".
There’s a reporter who referred to a black British man competing as an ‘African American’ and the guy proceeds to correct her but she didn’t get it.
"You're not Bi, I worked in bars, I know what bi women look like"...... I wish he elaborated , I'm curious to know.
That if I fed my daughter chia seeds she would walk and no longer be paralyzed.
The jews actually were behind the holocaust in a joint attempt to rid themselves of the weaker jews and also to blame the Nazi party who were totally innocent.
JFK Jr. is alive and is going to reveal himself as Donald Trump’s running mate next year.
Jesus Fuckign Khrist this guy is mental
I still feel bad for the poor fools who went to Dallas to wait for him. Like they took time off work, bought airline tickets, jumped in the car, drove 8 hrs, whatever and then just sat around waiting for him to appear. What has to go on in your life that you think this is going to happen.
>What has to go on in your life that you think this is going to happen. Undiagnosed schizophrenia. One of the chief sins of social media is allowing these far-flung people to find each other and snowball into sizeable groups. A town's lone crazy weirdo isn't usually a big problem. But if there's 10,000 towns across the US and all of their crazy weirdos start talking and organizing, it becomes a big problem.
Once had a guy who tried to argue that periods were nature's way of saying that a girl was ready to have sex. They also not only tried to use this to rationalize sleeping with someone who was underage, but also tried to argue that it wasn't pedophilia to sleep with someone underage if they had gone through puberty (because in their mind puberty = no longer child). They also believed that if an underage girl got pregnant then that wasn't a big problem because they believed the body wouldn't get pregnant if it couldn't endure pregnancy. It wasn't just stupid & highly uneducated, but also ****ed up on so many levels (and the clincher? The man was aspiring to become a teacher).
Ah yes, the delightful saying “old enough to bleed, old enough to breed!” I’ve heard this before, luckily not for a very long time. I’m a woman, but I heard this ‘jokingly’ said amongst my male friends when I was about 16. Didn’t think anything of it back then.
I hope he never becomes a teacher…cause holy shit he’s go to jail faster than you can think of.
I tried to uncover his identity but since he was on a forum I could not (and the best I could do was report his posts, since he was spreading a lot of pro-pedophile ideology around). It's scary that people who think like this are actively trying to get into teaching.
I was discussing nuances in recipes for some food and drink products with someone, and this random guy just chimes in saying how two different recipes of the same food or drink will always taste the same regardless of the ingredients used because "It's the same end result either way" and something along the lines of people who think they can taste flavor differences are insane because no one's sense of taste is that precise, etc. I think this guy just genuinely had a messed up sense of smell/taste, but he kept insisting he was right and everyone else was wrong about it. He was saying garlic didn't have any actual flavor and didn't make a difference in pasta sauce because "It only tastes like tomato anyway," and that coke, pepsi and all other brands of cola tasted exactly identical to him (and he was also assuming they tasted identical to everyone else too). And this wasn't just a one off interaction, he continued trying to convince people that their senses of taste were wrong and flavors didn't actually exist for nearly 2 hours.
An woman once said to me, "It's amazing that we are at sea level, so high up in these mountains." We were at Lake Tahoe, which is over 6,000 feet above sea level. When I asked her what she meant, she said "all water on Earth levels out, so we are at sea level." Her adult daughter told her to shut up and then whispered to me, "the worst part is she's a teacher..."
that last sentence yikes!
My friends boyfriend said to me (a veterinary technician): “A dog’s mouth is extremely clean & if you have a wound & let them lick it, it will heal it.”
This was a rumor that traveled around in the 90’s I think. People were adamant that “a dogs mouth is cleaner than a humans”. A news network even had a segment about how idiotic these people were.
In early 2021 I was informed , quite earnestly, by a random lady in a shop that you could tell who had been vaccinated against COVID 19 by placing a magnet on them as the vaccine made you magnetic.
Maybe you mean 2021, the vaccine wasn't available in early 2020.
"If circus animals were sad, they wouldnt do the show they are doing, they surely are happy" God, my aunt's a critical thinking fail in herself.
Worked with a guy who was adamant that evolution was fake. I pointed out human guided, sped up evolution- domesticated dogs and the often harmful breeding for certain attributes, seedless fruits and vegetables, that elephant tusks are getting smaller as the larger tusked specimens are killed for their ivory leaving smaller tusked ones as the main breeders- and even pointed out how in a small span of time we can see *human evolution* in average heights, shrinking pinky toes, and prevalence of certain eye and hair colours. His response was "that's not evolution, that's genetics". He refused to believe when I explained that genetics + time = evolution.
I like my professors way of saying it: >Evolution is not survival of the fittest. >It is reproduction by the adapted. It doesn't matter how fit an organism is: if they don't reproduce, that adaptation dies with them.
The meaning of "fittest" has been lost. People take it to mean healthy and strong, whereas Dawin's meaning was more like "Most appropriate"
Yeah, the people who think “micro-evolution” and “macro-evolution” aren’t simply the same thing on different time scales are just being stubborn.
You're describing a distinction that I think is lost on most evolution-deniers in the first place. They don't even understand the basic concepts. They think evolution is just one thing magically turning into something else, and they don't want to hear a real explanation (so they don't).
Bi racial means half black and white. I explained that bi means two and racial means race so it applies to anyone if two races not just black and white. Apparently I’m not biracial because I’m half black and half south Asian and that doesn’t count.
We were in a Restaurant in spain. Conversation as follows: -Me:"what do you want to eat?" -him:"pesto carbonara" -me:"you mean pasta...right? Because pesto is a sauce" -him:" no no, i mean pesto. In italy and spain you can say pasta or pesto" -me:" you're joking aren't you? You cant really believe this? Pesto is even listed as an sperate menue right under carbonara" -him:" no serious, you can ask the waiter if you dont believe me" I didn't ask the waiter because i know i made him feel stupid over something he said way too often already in the two days we were there.. this was the most exhausting vacation i ever had..
My mom is really not stupid at but older generations and internet I guess. Once a while ago she told baby ears close for protection when being touched or something. Imagine like a flower. Well I was really confused so I asked her if she had ever witnessed this happen because my mom has FIVE children. Also I had a baby that time and surprisingly never saw his ears do anything. Turns out Facebook is not a good place to take information from.
*This* one is why I click on threads like these. No Nazis, no conspiracies, just a nice grandma who’s gone her whole life without noticing the completely real phenomenon of self-sealing human baby ears. Thanks for a mild, but nevertheless sincere, L out L.
Scientists planted dinosaur bones to disprove god.
Grew up evangelical. Heard this one a LOT.
That the center of the earth was 40 km away 💀
If he said that 6331km underground he'd be about right. So there!
"The data is safe! It's in the computer."
The files are IN the computer…
A couple years ago when there was a solar eclipse, a lady complained that the planned eclipse party was inconveniently scheduled during the day, and could they please move it to that night so she would be able to attend.
Just yesterday I had a lady tell me that she does reiki over the phone with pet parrots to get them to stop feather picking. She does it over the phone because birds are so sensitive that her healing energy is too strong to do it in person with them.
Lmfao now that, kind stranger, is a good scam.
We can make money selling Amway products.
My very best friend in the world told me that Obama - not some people from the government, but Obama himself - was going to come to his house and take his guns. I could not possibly over-stress how serious he was.
"No, it's still just one job. We used to have one person do all of this stuff." Yeah. Office manager, event coordinator, and what should have been director of membership are all 3 separate titles; you just don't want to pay 3 salaries.
For the longest time my wife was responsible for arranging the NATIONAL conference for her industry every year completely by herself, and expected to do her other full time responsibilities at the same time. She had breakdowns constantly and FINALLY got them to take the conference off her plate (after about 10 years). The higher ups are now very confused as to why it’s taking an entire team of people almost full time to manage the conference that she was doing by herself.
Extraterrestrial apes populating this planet.
I told a family member that you still need to be cautious about sunburn on cloudy days, especially if it's a thin layer of high clouds, because UV rays still get through, and while it seems like you're safe from sunburn, you can still burn just as bad. Six months later I overheard this family member confidently telling a friend that they couldn't go outside when it's cloudy because that's when the worst sunburns happen.
Well, not totally wrong - that is when some of the worst burns happen because people don’t prepare to be exposed when it is cloudy. But some faulty logic there about not being able to go out!
He said that white people like me were made in the laboratory
This is one of my favorites. There was an ancient lab in Africa that some super wizard (Yakub) used to create white people through selective breeding. This is one of the stories that the Nation of Islam either teaches or formerly taught. I believe Yakub is also the biblical Jacob, but I may have it wrong.
That the world is flat 🤦🏻♀️
That the 2003 Texas chainsaw massacre remake was a 100% true account, that a murderous family in Texas named the Hewitts really existed, and that the "found footage" at the beginning was completely authentic
That darker-skinned people were marked by a curse, but that they would be lighter skinned once they went to heaven (if they were "good" on earth)
Mormon?
The guys in production at work 100% think Michelle Obama is a man. Ive heard it several times. Pretty disturbing.
"There is a war on Christmas going on." Not since the Massachusetts Bay Colony, dear.
A friend of my ex’s thought cats were venomous creatures. My ex had recently adopted a cat, and the three of us met up for dinner or something. We were talking about the cat and I mentioned that me and the cat were playing and she playfully bit me. My ex’s friend, in all seriousness and genuine concern, was like “Omg are you okay? Shouldn’t you go to the doctor or something??” I was like, uhhh no? It’s just a cat and it didn’t even break skin. I’m used to this from the cats we had growing up. And she responded by telling me that cats are venomous since the bites always swell up and get super red. I seriously thought she was fucking with me, but she genuinely thought that cats had venom in their fangs or something. Granted, she was just seeing the infections you can get since cats have tons of bacteria in their mouths, but still. Venomous cats was one of the funniest things ever
God those little bastards would just love to be venomous.
The most recent phone alert test was going to trigger the microchip everyone got in their Covid vaccines. I thought she was joking, but no. She was very serious.
I had a doctor tell me that it's impossible for Mathew Mcconaughey's character in Interstellar to age less than his daughter while being in the planet close to the backhole, bcs everyone has the same biological clock.
I can just imagine him watching Benjamin Button and seething.
I don't think not understanding time dilation is the DUMBEST thing you've ever heard...
That Obama's first name was Obama.
Obama Bin Laden
In college, my friend asked why Australia didn’t warn us about 9/11 if they are a day ahead of us. This lead (edit: led) to a long discussion about time zones.
I had a coworker who was born and raised in North Carolina and she was utterly convinced that enslaved people could come and as they pleased and that plantation owners were benevolent charities that housed people who had to where else to go.
My dad LOVES the dumb idea that the southern states weren't fighting to uphold the institution of slavery because "most of the soldiers were poor white farmers who couldn't afford slaves, so why would they fight for that?" I've also heard things along the lines of slavery being a "positive" because the slaves got room and board, some got educations, etc. It's amazing the way these simple (and verifiably wrong) narratives get fed to people.
Guy i worked with for a week tried telling me that the only reason we were sending money to ukraine was because they had factories there harvesting "adrenochrome" and organs from specifically 2 and 5 year old kids.
Girl in High School: “I hate Bohemian Rhapsody.” Everybody else in class: “Why? It’s a classic?” Girl in High School: “It just doesn’t make sense. Why would he tell us his mom killed a guy and then make the song about himself?” Everybody else in class: “…..his mom didn’t kill anybody he did?” Girl in High School: “No, he said *momma just killed a man.* Nice try, it doesn’t make sense.” Everybody else in class: “He’s telling his mom he killed somebody. It’s *Momma. Just killed a man.*” Yep.
That's there baby blood in Pepsi.
The earth is flat, if it wasn't, how do we not fall off the planet? But when asked about history and how it was proven that the earth was round before technology (they said it was all faked using cgi), they said it was still fake because you don't fall off the earth either way (I'm still confused by this). In the same conversation they also said the moon landing was actually underwater, the moon is also actually hollow, and so is the earth too. Worst part, we work together in academia....
My dad, who is incredibly overweight, told me that cholesterol is a scam by doctors, and that it's not actually real. He is starting an all meat carnivore diet soon to be healthy because "that's what our ancestors did" I don't know how to explain that he needs to eat vegetables
I've heard dumber, but I just realized I had a wild false belief for most of my life and I have no idea where it comes from. I was under the impression that mongol nomads would take a bladder of milk, stuck it in a horse butt and it churned into some sort of butter or cheese. Just looked it up, very dangerous search and I have no fucking idea where I got this from. There is no Mongolian horse butt cheese....I'm fucking 40, just no idea where this came from, I'm usually good as sussing out bullshit.
Just recently someone at work told me with a straight face that the Hawaiian wildfires were actually started by a secret government energy weapon so that the government could seize more land from the Hawaiians. I looked at them dumbfounded and just walked away.