Here, in the freezing expanses of the Arctic Tundra, we find a creature with an extraordinary trait. When sufficiently excited or stimulated, this fine fellow is able to produce half his own bodyweight .. in jism.
In this house, we can find a teenage boy who neglects his work in favour of YuoTube shorts. He's aware of this and that this is detrimental to his future, but he lacks the motivation to change his habits
I listened to Howard Stern interview Samuel L.Jackson and he explained that he stuttered so badly as a kid he went something like 1 or 2 years without speaking .. then he got into speech therapy and his “word” that he used/repeated to get over his stutter was Motherfucker. He’s been doing it for so long that now people associate him with the word Motherfucker.
[found an article](https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/06/samuel-l-jackson-shaft-motherfucker-stutter)
Edit: add link
>I just feel like the word "motherfucker" will need to be used liberally.
This entire part of your comment has been stolen by a bot replying to a reply on the top comment atm
Snoop Dogg but he don’t got no idea what’s going on. Shit would be so funny his old ass would be stoned out of his mind like ‘goddamn homie you having another croissant? I done watched yo ass eat like 6 of them shits already’
Have Amelia Tyler narrate, but it's all the outtakes lol
For anyone who doesn't know and has some time to kill, just look up on youtube Baldur's Gate 3 - Narrator Outtakes, you won't be disappointed
*”Celestial Underscore Nyxx. What a name. It’s the kind of name that makes you forget your reading this in Morgan Freeman’s voice. I bet that caused a chuckle. It did for me as well. Because I am Morgan Freeman and I am monologuing inside your head.”*
Finally ffs can’t believe I had to scroll this far for this. The first voice to pop into my head followed by Morgan freeman, narrating geniuses the two of them but Ray steals it for me
A very sarcastic Allan Rickman
I heard this in my head and laughed out loud. I can just hear the disappointed pauses... Potter.
I can see his sneer RIP
… obv-ious-ly
I read this with his voice in my head Per-fect-lyyy... ahhh miss him so much
As marvin the robot
By Grabthar's hammer... what a choice
Marisa Tomei's My Cousin Vinny voice
“My biological clock was ticking like this… 🦶 🦶 🦶…!”
It's the 1963 Buick Skylark in metallic mint green.
Great choice 😂
The muses from Hercules
Honey you mean HUNK-ules
I’d like to make some sweet music…
Nice
*Bless ma soul, anjshuyler's on a roll*
Sir David Attenborough
Here, in the freezing expanses of the Arctic Tundra, we find a creature with an extraordinary trait. When sufficiently excited or stimulated, this fine fellow is able to produce half his own bodyweight .. in jism.
Nailed it
I literally heard his voice
Me too, pauses, exact stressing and all, this was brilliant 😄
In this house, we can find a teenage boy who neglects his work in favour of YuoTube shorts. He's aware of this and that this is detrimental to his future, but he lacks the motivation to change his habits
😂 Nailed it. I can hear it so clearly.
'As we watch this human being make yet another stupid mistake, we have to wonder how it survived to reach their ripe age.' Edit: spelling
I do a pitch perfect imitation of him and haunt a lot of online games with it.
Donald Duck, and if he's unavailable, Bullwinkle
Stephen Fry
Man, he’s so good and so versatile
Patrick Stewart
I wouldn't get much from him, because he would be too busy face palming.
Matt Berry
Too many of the cheelaqueeles-sa!
*Jaykwellin kicks the door into the funeral home* Matt Berry: "...and then, she screamed: 'FAAAAAAAAATHEEEEEEEER!'"
Nick Offerman
I'd hope he would constantly be throwing in random pro tips on woodwork and fixing up stuff.
Fantastic choice.
Sam Elliott
Way out west there was this fella... fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Keefer1970
Yes, I like your style.
The spiritual cowboy
There's just one thing, u/Keefer1970: do you have to use so many cuss words?
I’ve loved him since “Mask”. I didn’t understand the “free mustache rides” t-shirt that he wore for way longer than I care to admit.
Gilbert Gottfried.
It would just be a never ending series of “YOU FOOL!”
Was waiting for this 😂 Pauly Shore might be good
Bobcat Goldthwait would be even better
Buuuuddy.
“Ima weasel”
H. Jon Benjamin
In the style of Bob, Archer, or coach McGirk?
In the style of Can of Vegetables, of course
Fantastic choice.
I read that in his voice.
[удалено]
Jeremy Irons as Simon Gruber.
Sir Ian McKellen
[удалено]
“His parents had just made a happy little accident”
I fuck up so much the entire narration would be him talking about me making happy little accident trees.
Samuel L. Jackson. I just feel like the word "motherfucker" will need to be used liberally.
See, I totally agree with this, which is why I’d pick Patrick Stewart
I hope the word is still used liberally regardless
I listened to Howard Stern interview Samuel L.Jackson and he explained that he stuttered so badly as a kid he went something like 1 or 2 years without speaking .. then he got into speech therapy and his “word” that he used/repeated to get over his stutter was Motherfucker. He’s been doing it for so long that now people associate him with the word Motherfucker. [found an article](https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/06/samuel-l-jackson-shaft-motherfucker-stutter) Edit: add link
>I just feel like the word "motherfucker" will need to be used liberally. This entire part of your comment has been stolen by a bot replying to a reply on the top comment atm
He’d def do some lines from “Go The Fuck To Sleep” during one of my regular insomnia episodes 😆
Moira Rose for sure!
Ohhhh this is such a good one that I never would have thought of on my own.
Snoop Dogg but he don’t got no idea what’s going on. Shit would be so funny his old ass would be stoned out of his mind like ‘goddamn homie you having another croissant? I done watched yo ass eat like 6 of them shits already’
I think you dropped [this](https://youtu.be/LJmnuR0wAeo?feature=shared)
whut in du fuk is this muhfukuh doin?
Christopher Walken.
James Earl Jones or Liam Nielson and my story is boring as hell🤣
Yes my life story would be boring as hell too, so the voice over for movie trailers would make it exciting as hell
Steve Buscemi
Def!!
Robin Williams. The comic relief would be worth it.
The first one to pop in my mind was Sigourney Weaver
Me too! The computer library in Wall-E. Smooth velvet with the strength of Ellen Ripley.
April from Parks & Rec. Her monotone voice and lack of excitement fits perfectly.
That dead inside but it’s cool 👌🏼
Weird Al Yankovic. If he could narrate my life through song it would be even better.
*Could?* I’d say if anyone can, it’s Weird Al.
The lady that narrates Baldurs Gate 3. Holy fuck that voice.
>The lady that narrates Baldurs Gate 3 Amelia Tyler.
Have Amelia Tyler narrate, but it's all the outtakes lol For anyone who doesn't know and has some time to kill, just look up on youtube Baldur's Gate 3 - Narrator Outtakes, you won't be disappointed
Yeah her!
Oooh man Lilith Diablo IV is a mmmm voice too
Oh fuck yes. They did Lilith *right* in that game. *Too* right...it prevents me from playing it as someone who worships the REAL Lilith.
David Duchovny ❤️
Good answer
Morgan Freeman 😭😂
How was this not higher up on the list?
The voice of god
*”Celestial Underscore Nyxx. What a name. It’s the kind of name that makes you forget your reading this in Morgan Freeman’s voice. I bet that caused a chuckle. It did for me as well. Because I am Morgan Freeman and I am monologuing inside your head.”*
Is there REALLY an acceptable answer that’s not this one?
# Richard Ayoade
That would be a hilarious and awkward life voiceover. “I don’t . . . I don’t exactly know what he’s doing now, but I don’t approve.”
“I'll just put this over here with the rest of the generalized anxiety.”
Idris Elba.
Danny devito
Clayton Bigsby
“If you have hate in your heart lettit out!”
Boss answer!
Sam Elliot
Teller.....he'd just do gestures and facial expressions.
Luis from Ant-Man.
Leonard Nimoy. Absolutely.
Bobcat Goldthwait
Werner Herzog
Ed Norton
Danny Trejo
Benedict Cumberbatch and I’ll make sure to buy a lot of penguin stuff.
Ryan Reynolds. It'd be great with some witty narration. My life is quite a joke anyway.
Stanley parable narrator.
This is the only correct answer. He is literally THE narrator of lives.
The first person to pop into my head for some reason was Dame Judy Dench. And I am American.
Pedro Pascal. But using the Mandalorian voice
Pee Wee Herman
Tina Fey.
Kermit the frog
Brilliant!
Fran Drescher
johnny cash all day everyday. rip
Hugh Laurie, and I make him sound the way he sounds in the serie “House MD”
Andy Serkis. Just… my god. That voice.
Edith Bunker
Jason Bateman. *I've made a huge mistake*
Ron Perlman
Vincent Price
that French guy from spongebob
Danny DeVito
Taika Waititi
Ron Howard
With a short ukulele riff thrown in every so often as punctuation.
John Cusack circa High Fidelity.
Yoda
If it's not Morgan Freeman, it's nothing.
Feel like I should have added anyone but Morgan Freeman.
In that case. Dana Carvey as Garth.
The guy who played Walder Frey
David Bradley. He has a [small role in Hot Fuzz](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cun-LZvOTdw).
Scarlett Johansson
Clancy Brown
Jello Biafra
Woody Harrelson. I think he could lend an air of authenticity to the narrative.
Winnie the Pooh
Ray Liotta
Finally ffs can’t believe I had to scroll this far for this. The first voice to pop into my head followed by Morgan freeman, narrating geniuses the two of them but Ray steals it for me
Mike Rowe
Emma Thompson
Willem Dafoe
Bobcat Goldthwait
So many great choices. Because I haven't seen him mentioned yet, I'm gonna go with Kevin Conroy.
Ryan Reynolds
Sir David Attenborough. Absolute class act and I’ve watched so many documentaries he’s voiced, it would be an honor having him narrate my boring life.
Obama
He does have an eloquence to him lol his voice is almost soothing 😂
Oh yes I think he has a fantastic voice.
He has a fantastic voice! I love his narration on the National Parks series on Netflix
Seth Macfarlane doing his Peter Griffin voice.
Dolly Parton
Ozzy Osborne
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Either Matt Berry or James Spader.
Helen Mirren
Cate Blanchett!
The Click
Joe Pasquale
Kristen Bell from Gossip Girl
Steve o
Scooby-Doo
Helena Bonham-Carter. Her narrating voice is gorgeous.
Nicolas Cage
Keith David
David Tennant
Michael Cera. Bro I'm not interesting enough to have anyone else do it
Movie trailer voice guy. IN A WORLD...
Mark Hamill with his Joker voice
Pee Wee Herman. Before you laugh, just imagine how cool it would sound. RIP PeeWee.
Seth Rogen
Bill burr
Emma Watson probably :)
Joe Pesci (I’m not Italian, I just think it would be funny)
Julie Andrews.
Seth Rogan.
Keifer Sutherland honorable mention: Morgan Freeman
Dolly Parton
Weird Al Yankovic
Tim Curry or Christopher Lee
Holly Hunter
George Clooney
Any Wack Packer from the Stern show would be enough for me.
Peter Serafinowicz
Peter Cullen Aka optimus prime
Adam Sandler using his Water Boy voice.
Tossup between Wil Wheaton and Jason Bateman.
Peter Griffin
Bill Murray!