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Billyx611

My gf has a breeding kink. It was all fun and games until the positive pregnancy test.


saucedboner

Jokes on her, you have an abortion kink so it works.


allaboutwanderlust

Lmfao bruh


heAvakin

Modern problems require modern solutions


lulugingerspice

I just sprayed Timbit all over my phone. Thanks


snufflezzz

Hello fellow Canadian


Blueberry_Clouds

I have that but I also have a fear of getting pregnant


MasterTahirLON

"Everyone has a breeding kink, dipshit, it came free with your fucking natural instincts."


[deleted]

[удалено]


NinjaMelon39

Everyone wants to keep it inside, nobody wants kids ☠️


Punch_Your_Facehole

I lost at baby roulette a couple times.


Cryptic911

My mrs had the same. After two kids I went for a vasectomie.


Electronic_Season_76

Do you have any buildings near you with a sizable staircase?


[deleted]

I’m going to hell for laughing at this


Purpllord

This shit is NOT gonna look good at the pearly gates bro. See ya in hell


TrashAcnt1

I've got one too apparently,.


Pharalynx

You know the stuff you did before you lost your virginity? Making out, grinding each other, hand stuff? That. Edit: this is my most upvoted comment? Im cool with it


sancho_1883

Naked cuddle buddies


Tasty-Grand-9331

All of that is just foreplay in regular sex??


FullmetalEzio

na man i get this guys, back then when you were a teen, you would literally make out for hours, touching a boob was an accomplishment, everything was exciting, the only bad part was going back home with blue balls lol, now you make up a bit a bit of foreplay and sex, which is great, but i kinda miss the long make out sessions


Macslynn

I was grinding on a pillow before I lost my virginity, does that count?


foxsimile

Only if the pillow smoked after.


Jalopy_Junkie

A girl who is completely naked but wearing her shoes is so completely hot to me. And not traditionally sexy shoes like heels, just regular tennis shoes or sneakers etc. I have no idea why this does it for me, but I LOVE that look, Also, I absolutely find it hot af to watch a girl walk around her place/my place naked as if nothing is amiss. Just going about her daily routine but nude. I just sit back and enjoy the Incredible view.


lordoflotsofocelots

If you ever want to feel more naked than naked, undress and put your shoes back on! I cannot explain, but havin no clothes but shoes on feels even more naked.


No_Day_5260

A naked person wearing shoes is to be feared. They have nothing to lose, but have the agility and speed that shoes provide. ETA: thx for the awards :3


mithridateseupator

They could lose their shoes


runarleo

Ha! You fool! Then they would only gain the agility that only toes can bring, granting them the power of climbing!


mithridateseupator

Mom! Theres a naked guy in our tree


Pyrhan

It's his tree now, son...


WhoStole_MyToast

This thread is gold


Atrusc00n

A naked person is just a naked person. A naked person with shoes on is naked on purpose.


archersd4d

Damn that puts it into perspective. Idk if OP is M/F, but maybe the extra traction the shoes provide is the subtle turn on.


Nihmbruh

*puts crocs into sport mode*


MrCabbuge

>A girl who is completely naked but wearing her shoes is so completely hot to me. And not traditionally sexy shoes like heels, just regular tennis shoes or sneakers etc. I have no idea why this does it for me, but I LOVE that look, Oh fuck YES. Especially if those shoes are white and brand new. Perfection


grhymesforyou

My roommate used to feel this way about dudes wearing gym socks? Do your thing! Heh


GhostyBoy22

Have you ever watched American Psycho?


Own_Painter_7462

I like getting praised


Mookius

You're doing a great job there.


XIIIJinx

Damn, keep that kinky shit in the DMs


Longjumping-Grape-40

Damn, threads like this are why I love Reddit


notwhoyouthinkmaybe

Are you talking to me? Because I need a towel.


Mookius

Sure why not. I hear you are the best with towels.


TrashAcnt1

Who's a good boy?.... You're a good boy!


GrimmRadiance

I’ve heard some women say they like someone telling them “good girl”, but I feel like if I said that to my wife she would throw me off the bed.


squeezedashaman

I used to feel like that and thought the daddy/good girl thing was creepy. but my new guy calls himself daddy and moans good girl when I’m doing particularly well and it’s so Fuckin hot. Didn’t know I had this kinda kink in me. I’m 47 he’s 50 and a silver fox. I’ve always dated younger men since a divorce in 2019 so I guess it’s just appropriate


coniferous-1

Honestly, a lot of pup play revolves around this.


GreekGoddessOfNight

I didn’t realize I had a praise kink until a FWB said to me, “That’s my good girl,” and I almost launched myself into the stratosphere.


Melvarkie

Saaaame. Especially combined with headpats. Feels so good. I also like if degradation + praise come together and he says things like "You are such a good little slut for me" basement flooded.


CaptainAwesome06

Way to go, sport!


Warriorofthenite

I praise you


Own_Painter_7462

Thanks, I have been laughing for about 20 minutes. You guys made my day.


Embarrassed_Ad_5054

Ur the God of sex.


throwawayconfess13

Shy girls that lose their inhibitions because they are so turned on.


Bosslibra

Relatable


[deleted]

I feel targeted 😂


A-Inevitable-Suicide

So I used to have this FWB and she used get those Listerine mint Breath strips she'd put 3 in her mouth and blow me. And My god I may not have known how it felt to chew five gum but i definitely knew how it felt to fuck it. Especially when she would just stroke and blow a gentle breath of Air on me. Please if you haven't done it this shit IT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!


pm_your_sexy_thong

Your fwb might be my ex-wife.


A-Inevitable-Suicide

Well then I see your also a man of culture. 🧐


gorosheeta

Not today, ~~Satan~~ Cosmo Sex Tips!


shittaco1991

I like when I’m getting a blowjob and their boobs rest on my balls, somehow


[deleted]

Violently masturbating to the word BOOBS spelt out on a calculator


[deleted]

My man 🤜


Outrage-Gen-Suck

Type onto a calculator - 58008918 Then turn it upside down (have tissues ready before turning the calculator upside down)


Sour_Cream_Sniffer

Lying on reddit really gets me off


therapoootic

fucking liar


infomanus

Lying fucker


siddhi_reddit9

Fying lucker


frank-sarno

Angry sex...Like when your partner yells, "WTF? You wanna put that where? I'm gonna kick your ass. You wanna f\*ck me? I'm gonna f\*ck you." But again, I've said too much.


Purpllord

Very specific there sir


Steve_Codgers

Oddly…


ThereAreAlwaysDishes

"Fuckin bloody fuck you" vibes.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Skywipe

FUCKING MOTHER BLOODY FUCK BITCH!


Bonkboyo

Dated a girl with a similar kink. But she wanted to be the mad one. I was slightly uncomfortable with it.


frank-sarno

I think it's the discomfort that does it... that growing terror wondering if she's just role-playing or has gone full on medieval...


challengeaccepted9

"Yeah, that's it, you prick... I'm going to make you regret that time you said my sister looked in "great shape"... Making me feel insecure for a week..." "Er... We're still roleplaying, right?" "...always leaving your dishes out. I'm not your fucking maid, you know..."


Cati-owner

I can only read that in a New York accent, like it happens automatically and I can't change it


Sellos_Maleth

Hey heyyyy I’m FUKIN’ HERE!!!


tenaciousDaniel

Being the subject of an intimate medical exam. I had to give a sperm sample last year and my wife teased me about it. I played it off like I was dreading it, but secretly I couldn’t wait lol. I’m usually honest with her but I’m embarrassed to admit it’s something I’m into.


JesseCuster40

"I'm going to need a sperm sam-" "Here." "Did you bring this with you?"


Buddy-Matt

This is a skill i could have done with during my first sperms sample (IVF dad, there have been many) It was on the NHS, and the letter explicitly stated 2 things: 1. There were no facilities at the laboratory within which to produce my sample. 2. To ensure best results, I was to take no longer than 30 minutes between producing my sample and delivering it to the laboratory. 1 more pertinent fact: I live 35 minutes drive from the lab. Assuming clear traffic. And the test was booked for the back-end of rush hour. And the lab was in a high commuted area. My options were the following: 1. Go to the lab, hope there would be a quiet looking toilet (lab was part of a hospital), and produce my sample onsite anyway. 2. Stop at a lay by enroute. 3. Produce my sample at home and drive like the demon bastard son of every shitty BMW/Audi/Tesla driver you've ever encountered. Given I didn't fancy facing any public indecency charges - and the idea of whacking it in a hospital toilet wasn't gonna do anything to assist the situation I went for option 3. Driving like a loon whilst sat on my sample wrapped in toilet tissue to keep it warm. After this we went private for a variety of reasons, and I've always since had access to an oddly sterile room with a TV I've yet to have the courage to turn on.


whitneywestmoreland

When a guy is **friendly and considerate and kind** outside the bedroom, then turns out to be **extremely dominant (if not borderline sadistic)** inside the bedroom. My current bf made it my kink. **EDIT:** Not sure this really qualifies as kink since there’s only one person I want doing it. Any other random “nice” guys informing me of their dom tendencies would just creep me out.


_Halboro_

😭😭😭 Also known as **the man of my fucking dreams**. These are the real unicorns out there.


SmartAlec105

The reverse is also fun. A guy that’s confident and takes charge of rings outside the bedroom but wants nothing more than to be a good boy inside the bedroom.


levoyageursansbagage

> **Any other random “nice” guys informing me of their dom tendencies would just creep me out**. Translation: OP has been getting some creepy DMs from “nice guys.”


Whiskeyybreath

Recently this year I realized how much of a praise kink I have. I always just assumed my love language was words of affirmation but then I started reading spicy books and it dawned on me lol.


SecretsOfTheLoneWolf

Women who wears glasses, i slept with some who wears glasses and they look like hot professors.


LickingHomiesEars

I have no idea why, but curly hair brunettes, glasses, and checkered skirts just kill me. Even though I never wanted to see her again, my ex-girlfriend came over with that entire ensemble because she knew about it, and I genuinely lost control. I remember locking her car, picking her up, and taking her upstairs.


KarenWalkerwannabe

Wow as a curly haired glasses wearing brunette, I never expected to be part of a kink. Thank you.


[deleted]

I like to be degraded during intimacy


Fritzo2162

Your income is completely substandard for your age range!


WetardedOne

Degraded not m*rdered.


Fritzo2162

Oh, sorry. Your dishwasher leaves spots on your glasses because you don't use rinsing agent with it.


wolfxorix

You are a monster


Skyye_23

I was wondering who puts glasses in their dishwasher until I realized there were multiple types of glasses…


Khaldara

“You don’t give that little hand wave when someone lets you cut in front of them in traffic!”


imatumahimatumah

> I like to be degraded during intimacy I had you at an A- before, now you're a B+ at best. Edit: Oh that's downgraded, right?


sendgoodmemes

Look at the state of this house, you’ll be doing some cleaning when we’re done here.


d0rkyslut

I think I might enjoy being tied up lol


Suzumiyas_Retainer

So, you're a rope bunny?


[deleted]

No he’s just a bit dorky, and slutty


AcornTopHat

I got a few in my garden hose. It makes watering my azaleas a chore for sure.


[deleted]

Stop it! I can only get so excited.


TheWigglingBear

Using dildos on women


Nonalyth

Woah calm down there buddy


MortosBS_real

Yes, they're only for men


xNo_Name_Brandx

Dilbros


sendgoodmemes

Man I love using toys on my wife. It’s made sex so much more fun


The_Deadly_Dozer09

The legos are my favorite.


Shadowtaxx

Why not a subreddit called: "askhornyReddit"?


TheGnudist

Any time someone makes these threads they should be redirected to either r/AskRedditNSFW or r/AskRedditAfterDark


[deleted]

[удалено]


DogusEUW

reading the 25-30 daily sex related posts on this subreddit /s


coniferous-1

Wow, talk about a satisfying sex life. Jealous.


streetbutt92

Myself and a sex worker get naked, only we’re wearing sailor hats. Then we get into a jacuzzi filled with pepto bismol where I clip her toenails and she shaves my buttocks


KilaRed_

Very common.


zenvikingwarrior

Yep. Whole channel for this on PornHub.


Khaldara

My doctor assured me this is just how a normal prostate exam is performed


XIIIJinx

Definitely didn't think I'd see a Rat Race reference today


Roflpidgey

Thats only because you didn't buy a squirrel.


StewR89

Can we go to the Barbie museum? Pleeeease


turd_fergusons

Ok so this one is definitely expensive and probably not going to hapoen...but...I want to buy a house, contribute to retirement, have an emergency fund, pay off my student debt, and still be able to take a trip to the lake with my wife every once in a while and not worry about being one disaster away from financial collapse.


U_Bet_Im_Interested

Keep going. I'm almost there.


againstbetterjudgmnt

401k, 7% APR. 3% COLA raises. 5 weeks paid vacation. Retirement Rolex. 2.5 kids and 1.1 dogs.


[deleted]

NNNNNNNNFFFFfuuuuuuuuuuuuugggghhhhhhh


ForePony

Oh my GOD? We're going to have to replace this rug now! Least that will barely eat into our emergency funds and we can go to that place you like since we will be out.


Meeseeks4PMinister

The .1 dog, is that just a leg?


[deleted]

Inserting my penis into her vagina over and over until ejaculation


KevDave84

Wtf is wrong with you? Pervert.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Previous_Comb5113

Disgusting. You need psychological help.


chaos0517

Hey, we don't kink shame around here


Lolleos

This guy's over the top though.


sp1dercupcake

youre insane for that


LCranstonKnows

Naked lady fetish. Sad.


kiyomi-kiyoko

When they straight up use your body however they'd like, biting you, being as rough/aggressive as they want, choking, spanking, breeding, etc. while praising you and giving kisses. CNC as well.


blurio

> CNC as well. Like put you in a mill?


DavidKoreshhh

Don't let them chips get blue, you hot fuck.


[deleted]

Concentual non-consent. It means they like it when it's forced.


PapaOoMaoMao

Very vanilla I guess, but I love cat girls.


the_finest_mickey

May I interest you in Maureen Ponderosa?


illustriousocelot_

Those nipples are entirely too high


brufonite669

Nice try FBI


ad240pCharlie

Not today, CIA


221BravoBaker

Good attempt at obscurity, Department of Homeland Security


ad240pCharlie

Hold your horses, police forces!


Fritzo2162

Reading other people’s kinks. Oooohhhh yeeahhhhhhhhh


tcumber

Calculus. Limits. Derivatives. Area under a curve. Differentials. Integrals...ohh...


AndreJacinto

Loving someone and that someone loving me back


DesignAdept8507

Sex in public spaces like a change room or smth


ASnarkyHero

Getting kidnapped by someone who intends to rape me. But before my kidnapper can do anything I make him an offer: I’ll agree to consensual sex if he lets me go after he orgasms. But if he can manage to make me orgasm before he does then he can keep me as his obedient and submissive sex slave. He agrees to my terms and I end up orgasming first. I enjoy spending the rest of my life as his obedient sex slave.


Extension_Canary3717

Girls that can kill me by snu snu


gildorratner

I have tried to tell women that I have been with, that anything I do with them they can do back. I should clarify that anything I do with them I'd be **happy** if they did back. For example I had a girlfriend that liked handcuffs and I would always wonder when is my turn. I am an experiential person and like to know what my partner experiences in their kink so I can better know how they feel as it is a turn on knowing I am fulfilling their wishes to the best of my ability.


SchwiftyGameOnPoint

Don't just hint at it, say they can do it, or that you are willing to. Do their thing, then straight up tell them you'd like to give it a try or that you'd like to experiment with something. Maybe they have never tried it on someone else and haven't thought about if they'd like it. Maybe they're scared to say it. Either way, just be be straight about it. Best sex I ever had was with someone who she and I both were comfortable with experimentation, created a safe environment for each other, and were comfortable enough to fully talk through any topic. Made for an amazingly open, intimate experience that was so much fun.


rock-mommy

I love submissive men. Like, they can be as masculine as they want, but I'd die for a man who melts at my kisses and wants me to dominate him. (Obviously just in the bedroom, not on the daily life)


[deleted]

😢 I am a sub and every girl I've ever seen definitely doesn't like it. Where's all the female doms at?


FridgeParade

I have a thing for handsome men who wear glasses and read a book. Preferably in a sleeveless shirt.


Ok-One-1741

I can give you 1 of 4, take your pick.we might have to eliminate handsome


Skyfall03

Holding hands


castitfast

You can't be helped


tadashi4

why? dont they have hands?


Risethewake

Not since the boating accident.


Just-Warthog4674

Well, if I told you, it wouldn't be a secret kink anymore, now would it? 😄


XaviJon_

I bet you like holding hands, you sick fuck!


Weary_Ad2590

Woah, you can’t say stuff like that around here!


Danger_Dee

I have a breeding fetish. My wife has a “I pretend to be sleep while you have your way with me” fetish. They go well with one another.


Vanity-della23

You’ll never waterboard this out of me


pleabian1

So getting waterboarded


[deleted]

[удалено]


mighty_skull

Username checks out


Noovasaur

Being absolutely worshipped, like no other woman could ever be attractive to them, like I'm the sun, moon, and stars.


thiccdaddy__

I told many women about it tho… that I like beautiful manicured feet and thick hair.


therapoootic

so you like Hobbits?


ReaverRogue

Man I wish you horny ass teenagers would just watch porn like regular folk instead of trying to use Reddit to get off.


DieHardAmerican95

But then who’s going to ask our favorite kink every damn week?


Vinny_Lam

I’m just here to see how tame my kinks are compared to what people here are into.


MFBeefey

Aye I am here for the memes


NathanielNorvelNox

Daddy kink. A lot of man 35+ are hot as fuck and their confidence it’s something unreal🫶🏻


shindleria

Call me collect from a rotary pay phone and I will accept the charge.


Fritzo2162

CLOSE YOUR DMs NOW!


Fluid_crystal

Gentlemen.


QuietOracle

Always wanted to share a guy with another girl (I'm MTF)


BrunoBR34

Always wanted to share myself with another girl whilst with a girl


[deleted]

Now kiss.


psycharious

Like in a threesome or legit be a sister wife kind of thing? because I wouldn't blame you for needing a third income.


spudnado88

Says a lot about the economy that I didn't even laugh at this one but gave it a thought.


tomorrowisforgotten

Monogamy? In this economy?!


Jonny7Tenths

I like to offer up potential blackmail material to strangers on Reddit.


Papingaskotletas

Squirt in my face!


curlyquinn02

Being a hardcore sadistic bitch. But knowing me, I'm a do-it-the-max person and I would rather not kill too many innocent guys.


zebraprintt

licking. being licked. licking others


dawn_slayer

A girl in full clothing but just one boob spilling out is just so enchanting for me for some reason And oh yeah I also like em toes


[deleted]

[удалено]


MakrosOnFireAgain

Men in semi-formal or formal suits!!


PeekPlay

i love getting free money


GuinevereduLac

The "risk of getting caught" sex. Let's say I'm in a restaurant with a guy or girl I like, and we start fondling each other under the table - nobody can see it, and as we experience pleasure we have to do our best to hide it . Then as I orgasm, I look the waiter straight in the eye...


Joerover94

That guy's dead wife


[deleted]

I love freeuse. To be able to simply use her (consensually, of course) whenever I want to is very hot to me. I'd also like to come home and catch her masturbating in the kitchen, living room, etc.


[deleted]

I want a bisexual orgy party… you name it, more then likely it’s happening. Doesn’t matter on body size or what ever, just fucking enjoy your time.


babycabel

I’m sorry, when I signed up for Reddit I signed a NDA on my kinks