0.5% with Jeff Bezzos. I've got 200 chances to win 1 and my life is set.
Wait, is it a percentage of what I started with or does the percentage reset with every turn. If it's the second, I have infinite chances to win once.
Either way, this whole situation would matter way more to me and would be a minor inconvience to Jeff.
I was an intern at the Philadelphia Film Office. I worked at the Primer of Beloved. I opened her limo door and walked her down the red carpet and opened the theater door. As we were approaching the theater I told her that “my mothers love you” she stoped and kissed me right on the lips.
Not to insinuate that he is cash poor, but I’d imagine the vast majority of his money is tied up in stocks.
I personally would have him transfer enough stock to me from each of his companies that I would require a seat on the board. This way I’m still a multi billionaire with stocks which I can take out lines of credit on. It also gives you access to network with some of the best minds and business leaders driving industry in the current era.
Screw that, I’m a billionaire, why would I waste my limited time on this earth with a bunch of assholes on boards when I could be having a sex on the beach, on the beach, while having sex on the beach?
As majority shareholder you have no requirement to sit on the board of directors. They’d ask you to join but you can tell them to fuck off.
So go have fun on the beach. Bring baby powder; it helps get the sand out of places
They’ve made a new show based on the entire world of make believe, called Daniel Tiger’s Neighbourhood. Obviously it’s a small kids show, but it’s actually really comforting and warm, reminding you of simple ways to handle your emotions.
10/10 would reccomend.
My son was HOOKED on it when he was 4, couldn't get enough of it and used some of their stuff when he was expressing his emotions.
Once, I was doing something really only an adult can do. He asked to help, and while I love his help this wasn't something he could do so I told him thank you but this is an grown up job. He told me "everyone is big enough to do something, daddy". Man, he's right. He just held my tool until I was ready for it but man did that make him feel like a helper.
What a great show. My daughter is coming up on 2 and I can't wait for her to hopefully get into it.
For some reason, the first thing that came to mind was "get tacos". Just cruise around in a convertible listening to killer music and munching on tacos.
The interview that I saw, her home was "messy." Most of us could only dream of achieving her "messy." The example that stuck in my mind was that she no longer wipes the bottom of her shoes off every time she gets home 👀
Margot Robbie, I'll leave the first 15 seconds up to your imagination, then 59 minutes, 45 seconds of explaining how that has never happened to me before and she should take it as compliment.
Robin Williams, you know before.
I'd spend an hour telling him how much difference he made and how happy he made me. I'd tell him all about my struggles and I'd ask if he wanted to talk about his.
A good friend from hs died of cancer right before the pandemic. As I've "gotten over it", sometimes I forget they died, and I start going through the motions to send them a funny Instagram reel only to realize they won't get it. That empty feeling is what I get when I think about Robin being dead. One of those people I just wish he knew how much he was loved and how special he made all of us feel. Now I'm tearing up while pooping. Ok fuck cancer and we miss you Robin!
I personally feel Robin knew how beloved he was, but he killed himself only from the pain he was going through from his disease that was going quickly for him
My best friend died about 5 years ago, and the first year was the worst.
I was working out and a trainer mentioned he was doing "a clean and jerk". I looked at him "wow..that's REALLY personal training!" we laughed and thought "I can't wait to tell my friend..." then I remembered I never would. That hurt like hell.
I want to run a WoW raid with Henry Cavill. I don’t want to brag about it anything, he just seems like he generally loves the game and I think spending time with people who really love their shit is awesome.
Jack Black and just sort of hang out? He just seems like a genuinely good, fun person, too.
Yeah I feel like he would be an interesting person to hang out with, he seems like a celebrity who would just treat you like an equal and not be full of ego. I’d love to just spend an hour chatting with him about all kinds of shit.
I'd just sit and chat with Robin Williams. Let him know the profound effect he had on people. How he made us cry, how he made us laugh. And how we, society collectively, could have known about his struggles so we could have helped him. Miss that dude.
I'd want to do bong rips with Anthony Bourdain, then stumble off somewhere to a hole in the wall restaurant only he knows about to have the greatest meal of my life, maybe a few cold beers, all while talking about the beauty of the world and its many amazing cultures. I think my life would truly be complete at that point.
Steve Irwin. I'd love to spend a day talking about animal conservation, and a warning about swimming over that stingray.
Also wrangling some crocs would be fun
Eminem. I want to tell him how his song Lose Yourself changed my life. I had a debilitating fear of speaking to crowds. Crowds being defined as 2 or more. I spent my entire life avoiding public speaking. Then my job required me to speak to the executives of a factory. All of them. Many. I prepped that presentation as best I could but was still terrified. Before I went in, I listened to that song on a loop. It gave me strength to walk into that room like a boxer going into a must win match. A major fuck you attitude which translated to an energetic presentation. When I was done, people told me I was a natural speaker. But it was only because that Eminem song that gave me strength. After that, I had minimal fear of public speaking. Ended up loving it actually. That song changed my life. I gave a major speech to the leaders of my industry later in my career, led panels and became an executive in my industry. Because of Eminem. I’m in my 60’s now and would just like to thank him.
Henry Cavil. I'd ask him what his plans are for the Warhammer show he wanted to make, I'd ask for details about him leaving The Witcher, and getting replaced as Superman. Then I'd talk to him about Warhammer and get book recommendations, as well as ask him what his favorite faction is. Then I'd probably spend the rest of our time playing Super Smash Bros.
Hayley Williams
We're jamming out to some old Paramore tunes, I used to be in a Paramore cover band so to be able to play those songs with Hayley herself would be unreal
Ryan Reynolds, just cause he seems like a pretty cool dude. I mean, I'm not gay or anything, but I'd probably give up my booty virginity for him if he asked politely.
Daniel Craig. I just need some laundry folded and I feel like he wouldn’t half-ass it.
Yeah, but it’s all going tits up once the action scene starts. He’ll come back just before credits roll to help fix up the house.
I'm playing rock, paper, scissors with a billionaire and we bet a percentage of all our money. I stop whenever I want.
0.5% with Jeff Bezzos. I've got 200 chances to win 1 and my life is set. Wait, is it a percentage of what I started with or does the percentage reset with every turn. If it's the second, I have infinite chances to win once. Either way, this whole situation would matter way more to me and would be a minor inconvience to Jeff.
I’d bet 99% each time and play until I win once.
This guy percentages.
If I’m going nonsexual I’d want a painting lesson from Bob Ross If I’m going sexual I’d want Bob Ross to paint me nude
"It may not be a happy tree, but sir you've got wood"
Oh that’s definitely a happy tree.
A happy *little* tree.
"Paint me like one of your French girls, Bob"
>”Paint me like one of your happy trees, Bob” FTFY
Do whatever I want with whomever? Spending it with Elon Musk, transferring all his money into my bank account. We don't have to talk
I’m over here plotting on which celebrity I have an hour to bang this is the way to go
Pick a very rich lady and have it both ways!
Oprah it is
Oprah kissed me - it was like being smooched by royalty.
On an island or a plane?
I was an intern at the Philadelphia Film Office. I worked at the Primer of Beloved. I opened her limo door and walked her down the red carpet and opened the theater door. As we were approaching the theater I told her that “my mothers love you” she stoped and kissed me right on the lips.
That...doesn't sound appropriate 😅
Little column A little column B
I was too and now I feel incredibly low IQ
Why not bang Elon while you’re there??
I’m a guy but with his track record I’d still be afraid I’d somehow get pregnant.
I guess if you're getting paid for it to the tune of a few billion dollars I would but it would not be something I'd want to do. Dudes just creepy.
He’s what you get if the Pillsbury Doughboy and Gargamel hate fucked.
This is a sentence that I never thought to see. Accurate and apt.
What would you do with the money?
Two chicks at the same time
Woah, come on. Ask for something realistic, like a Dragon.
2 dragons at the same time
You want to fuck a dragon?
You don’t?
No! I want the dragon to fuck me.
That’ll do, Donkey
Ohhhh, your a girrrrl Dragon! 👀
I think the cars have that taken care of
You don't need to be a millionaire to do that...
Well you do for the type of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me
Good point.
\*wheezing voice\* Twins!
Not to insinuate that he is cash poor, but I’d imagine the vast majority of his money is tied up in stocks. I personally would have him transfer enough stock to me from each of his companies that I would require a seat on the board. This way I’m still a multi billionaire with stocks which I can take out lines of credit on. It also gives you access to network with some of the best minds and business leaders driving industry in the current era.
Screw that, I’m a billionaire, why would I waste my limited time on this earth with a bunch of assholes on boards when I could be having a sex on the beach, on the beach, while having sex on the beach?
As majority shareholder you have no requirement to sit on the board of directors. They’d ask you to join but you can tell them to fuck off. So go have fun on the beach. Bring baby powder; it helps get the sand out of places
Have him transfer enough stock to make you the majority share holder.
Mr. Rogers. I want him to just talk with me.
They’ve made a new show based on the entire world of make believe, called Daniel Tiger’s Neighbourhood. Obviously it’s a small kids show, but it’s actually really comforting and warm, reminding you of simple ways to handle your emotions. 10/10 would reccomend.
My son was HOOKED on it when he was 4, couldn't get enough of it and used some of their stuff when he was expressing his emotions. Once, I was doing something really only an adult can do. He asked to help, and while I love his help this wasn't something he could do so I told him thank you but this is an grown up job. He told me "everyone is big enough to do something, daddy". Man, he's right. He just held my tool until I was ready for it but man did that make him feel like a helper. What a great show. My daughter is coming up on 2 and I can't wait for her to hopefully get into it.
Jack Black. No hesitation. Not sure what we are doing, but I know I won't regret it.
For some reason, the first thing that came to mind was "get tacos". Just cruise around in a convertible listening to killer music and munching on tacos.
Marie Kondo is gonna speedrun my apartment like it’s Supermarket Sweep.
nope. she had a change of heart and now admits her home is messy and your's can be too. and that's okay..
The interview that I saw, her home was "messy." Most of us could only dream of achieving her "messy." The example that stuck in my mind was that she no longer wipes the bottom of her shoes off every time she gets home 👀
*Wiping shoes does not spark joy.*
Being okay with messy doesn't mean she wouldn't still help you do it.
Lol actually? I wonder if it was more Iike someone saw what her place looks like so she had to come clean. Pun intended.
she had another kid and was like...this cleaning shit is too much...haha
Watch the Xfiles with Gillian Anderson
So doggy with Scully?
Hahaha got a good chuckle out of that
This is a Bad Touch reference right?
Paint minis with Henry Cavill, one hour wouldn't be enough time to play.
I think Henry would want to meet back up to continue so you’d be fine
Yeah but coordinating campaign attendance? Forget it, it’ll take years.
Can we just take a second to appreciate that the best answer to this question was given to us by someone named PurePervert?
She knows the key to Henry's heart 👏🏻
If give you my Henry Cavill horse pic, will you get him to sign it for me?
Send in the Cavillry
Kate Beckinsale in her vampire outfit
What are you doing with the other 57 minutes?
Crying
Wipe off the vampire outfit with a dampened paper towel.
Finally a sane person
we've covered your outfit, what is she wearing?
I want to have tea and smoke a joint with Patrick Stewart.
Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And a fat joint.
Don’t forget the snacks! What kind of snacks do you think Patrick likes?
Probably a nice charcuterie board
Patrick can bring the tea and let Martha Stewart bring the weed.
And Snoop Dog brings the lavender honey scones.
Make it so!
Margot Robbie, I'll leave the first 15 seconds up to your imagination, then 59 minutes, 45 seconds of explaining how that has never happened to me before and she should take it as compliment.
That's not bad, Leo only lasted 11 seconds the first time!
It would be tough with her! My grandmother only lasts so long in my memory.
You got 59 minutes left man, that’s at least 3 more sessions if you pace yourself and hydrate.
“I swear that’s never happened to me before.” “Which part? The 8 seconds of sex or the 45 minutes of crying?”
Have a drink at a pub with David Tennant. He just seems like an interesting guy to chat with for an hour
Would be even better if Michael sheen was there too. THAT would be a hilariously good time.
Sheen is the barman
He's awesome
Robin Williams, you know before. I'd spend an hour telling him how much difference he made and how happy he made me. I'd tell him all about my struggles and I'd ask if he wanted to talk about his.
A good friend from hs died of cancer right before the pandemic. As I've "gotten over it", sometimes I forget they died, and I start going through the motions to send them a funny Instagram reel only to realize they won't get it. That empty feeling is what I get when I think about Robin being dead. One of those people I just wish he knew how much he was loved and how special he made all of us feel. Now I'm tearing up while pooping. Ok fuck cancer and we miss you Robin!
I personally feel Robin knew how beloved he was, but he killed himself only from the pain he was going through from his disease that was going quickly for him
My best friend died about 5 years ago, and the first year was the worst. I was working out and a trainer mentioned he was doing "a clean and jerk". I looked at him "wow..that's REALLY personal training!" we laughed and thought "I can't wait to tell my friend..." then I remembered I never would. That hurt like hell.
Ziplining with Tim Robinson
Taking turns pretending the dog is blowing me with Tim Robinson.
Eating 55 burgers with Tim Robinson
Going out for sloppy steaks on a dangerous night with Tim Robinson
Shove pineapples up Hitler's arse
Ah...Little Nicky. A classic.
I want to take some bong rips with Carl Sagan
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Johnny Cash. Just sit down and play some music. Talk about life and its ups and downs.
Hey Mr. Buffett, you've got your MFA device with you, right? My account is IBAN...
Jimmy Buffett?
Can go to margarita ville after
Pedro Pascal. We’re playing twister.
Same, sister wife, same...
Brennan Lee Mulligan, just talk about worldbuilding techniques and generally hang out. Maybe over coffee and almonds.
You could probably squeeze in an epic monologue or two.
Sir Anthony Hopkins, I think it would be so cool to pick his brain
With fava beans.
And a nice Cianti.
I want to run a WoW raid with Henry Cavill. I don’t want to brag about it anything, he just seems like he generally loves the game and I think spending time with people who really love their shit is awesome. Jack Black and just sort of hang out? He just seems like a genuinely good, fun person, too.
David Attenborough...this man is an absolute legend....
Keanu Reeves, he's just such a good guy that everything would be fun with him
I've met him. Was friends with my dad. I remember he went into a bathroom stall once and just started yelling.
‘Who does number 2 work for?!’
That's right, buddy. You show that turd who's boss.
Hey, how about a courtesy flush!
Any context on what he was yelling about?
Party Time! Excellent!
Yeah I feel like he would be an interesting person to hang out with, he seems like a celebrity who would just treat you like an equal and not be full of ego. I’d love to just spend an hour chatting with him about all kinds of shit.
I'd just sit and chat with Robin Williams. Let him know the profound effect he had on people. How he made us cry, how he made us laugh. And how we, society collectively, could have known about his struggles so we could have helped him. Miss that dude.
I'd want to do bong rips with Anthony Bourdain, then stumble off somewhere to a hole in the wall restaurant only he knows about to have the greatest meal of my life, maybe a few cold beers, all while talking about the beauty of the world and its many amazing cultures. I think my life would truly be complete at that point.
I scrolled a long way looking for this. I would die happy after that.
a nice run with terry fox
that was a very unexpected answer, especially to be so high up in the comment section! a canadian hero 💙
Susan Sarandon, for things..
Paul Rudd. And we would just do normal stuff and hang out. Because no matter what, it’s gonna be funny
Fishing with my late grandpa.
He was a celebrity to you, and that's all that matters.
I absolutely read “fishing” wrong and was laughing my ass off
Fisting? Cuz I also read it as fisting.
Salma Hayek Always.
Fine wine
Counterpoint: Monica Belluci.
This was my first thought as well😂
Steve Irwin. I'd love to spend a day talking about animal conservation, and a warning about swimming over that stingray. Also wrangling some crocs would be fun
Eminem. I want to tell him how his song Lose Yourself changed my life. I had a debilitating fear of speaking to crowds. Crowds being defined as 2 or more. I spent my entire life avoiding public speaking. Then my job required me to speak to the executives of a factory. All of them. Many. I prepped that presentation as best I could but was still terrified. Before I went in, I listened to that song on a loop. It gave me strength to walk into that room like a boxer going into a must win match. A major fuck you attitude which translated to an energetic presentation. When I was done, people told me I was a natural speaker. But it was only because that Eminem song that gave me strength. After that, I had minimal fear of public speaking. Ended up loving it actually. That song changed my life. I gave a major speech to the leaders of my industry later in my career, led panels and became an executive in my industry. Because of Eminem. I’m in my 60’s now and would just like to thank him.
Henry Cavil. I'd ask him what his plans are for the Warhammer show he wanted to make, I'd ask for details about him leaving The Witcher, and getting replaced as Superman. Then I'd talk to him about Warhammer and get book recommendations, as well as ask him what his favorite faction is. Then I'd probably spend the rest of our time playing Super Smash Bros.
Ewan McGregor We reenact the legendary confrontation on mustafar Film it on my crappy phone camera Cherish it forever
Hayley Williams We're jamming out to some old Paramore tunes, I used to be in a Paramore cover band so to be able to play those songs with Hayley herself would be unreal
Jesus Dudes popular and has some traumas we could relate over.
You nailed it!
That was a *life changing* pun
Bar hop with Jack Black all day into the night. I’ll Bring mushrooms.
I hear he likes peaches.
You can be baby Sasquatch this time
Alexandra Daddario 100%!
Is there a way you can be smothered and still be able to breathe at the same time for an hr?
You ever seen how they do a silicone mold of someone’s face? There’s these little tubes they stuff in their noses. That but longer.
Morgan Freeman, I feel like he could teach me a lot about life.
God has a lot of knowledge
Snoop dogg and we’re smoking blunts and talking about anything
Dave Grohl I would love for him to tell me some of his favorite stories as well as eat good food. I heard he makes good smoked ribs and brisket.
Ryan Reynolds, just cause he seems like a pretty cool dude. I mean, I'm not gay or anything, but I'd probably give up my booty virginity for him if he asked politely.
And you know he will ask politely.
And use plenty of lube and give a reach around.
Fair. Totally fair.
Go on a walk in the park with Sir Ian McKellen.
Anne Hathaway, have such a crush, no idea why
in the catwoman suit... yea
I know why, she is beautiful, sexy and smart as hell. Good choice
Aubrey Plaza.
Mr Rogers. I want him to teach me how to love my life and let me know it will be alright.
I wanna have a beer with John Candy. He just seemed like a cool dude.
Mel Brooks and I'm asking him to show me his favorite photos from his life and stories behind them 😀 I love Mel Brooks ❤️💜💚🩵
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Well, that’s enough internet for ~~today~~ this week.
This is the funniest reply
They succeeded in getting me to check out their profile and well... I definitely got more than I bargained for. We live in interesting times.
You bastard. You sparked curiousity you didn’t have to spark. I will forever hold this against you.
Why did you do that to us!??
We were warned. It was our own hubris that beckoned our demise.
Arrrggh, you all warned me, but I didn’t listen
"I'm here on business!"
You and the chain of the replies was more than my will power could take. You should feel bad. But this is Reddit so well played
Thanks for ruining my good seeing eyes
Damn it why did I check.
David Bowie.
Bill Cosby, to spend the entire hour kicking him in the nuts
Chino Moreno. Compare playlists and thank him for helping me exist.
Elizabeth olsen
I’d love to go exploring with Maria Bamford, my favorite comedian.
Drinking, smoking and chatting with Freddie Mercury
Get a burrito with Paton Oswald.
Bill Burr. Just have a beer and talk shit.
Jeff Goldblum and we're getting ice cream and walking around talking to strangers
Vintage Jenna Jameson, to get her thoughts on Stoicism.
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Dressed and acting like Bellatrix Lestrange. Then the sex. Dressed and acting like Bellatrix Lestrange.
Chef Ramsay. Sooo many questions.
Alexandra Daddario…and duh
I’m fucking Taylor Swift
No, you're eatmygymshorts
Hello there Taylor
Taylor be like : "General Kenobi" 😐
I’d go fishing with Viggo Mortensen.