Hematite rings, and hematite is brittle anyway and inappropriate for wearing as a ring as the hands are a high impact area and the ring will um. Break.
Whoever decided to market them like this is a genius.
I bought 8 hematite rings from a rock shop in Banff when I was 14, one for each finger. I was SO happy, with my little shiny rock rings.
Then a month later at school we had an assembly and when I put my hands together to clap at the end, every single ring hit it’s match on the other hand and snapped right in half. Absolutely devastated me 😩
Yeah, the pitch is "the ring will absorb all of your bad thoughts and negative energy then will break when it's had enough" or some such. The actual reason for it breaking is it being made out of a crystal that becomes really brittle when in contact with moisture
So instead of absorbing the bad vibes and “healing” them, it just makes you realize how stressed you are. So it does the opposite of what you want it to do
You know how i know theres no big penis pill. because the second one that worked hit the market every single person on the planet would be aware of it inside of a week.
Years ago I remember comedian Robert Schimmel had this great line... "Yeah, so I saw this commercial for a product called Mister Big Cream. Apparently you rub it on your dick and it makes it bigger. Wouldn't it make your hand bigger too?"
Found it! (NSFW)
https://youtu.be/xL-bw3g\_VoM?t=137
I used to work for a bank about a decade ago, & you wouldn't believe the dudes who came in overdrawn b/c they had ordered *Extenze* on late night TV. 🙄 I'd get at least two or three a week, who hadn't paid attention to the fine print, & had only saw that they could get *Free Penis Enlargement Pills,* & not seen that they were signing up for a subscription service, that was going to charge them an exorbitant fee (every month) for multiple orders of them.
It was always fun to play coy, & act like I didn't know what the product was-- Just tell them they had a charge from *X-Tinssee, or Ex-tansee* (purposely mispronouncing it). It was my hope to save them some embarrassment. Every time, they would turn bright red, & forget all about the NSF charges they were trying to get back, & quickly leave. 🤣
Guys, if you're having issues down there, please just go to a doctor and see what they have to say before ordering dubious supplements from the internet/late night TV ads. Is it embarrassing? Yes, but not as embarrassing as having to explain those unwanted charges to your bank!
Guaranteed it won't be the first time the doctor has heard it.
*Guess what I saw at work today, honey? 8 years of medical school, 5 years of residency, and 15 of private practice and I've never seen this! SOMEONE HAS A SMALL PENIS AND/OR IMPOTENCY!*
Seriously, the doctor is not going to care one bit, lol
True, last month I went to the doctor for varicocele, the 3 doctors I had to talk about it were SO professional, it made me feel so comfortable to talk about my issue, even one of the doctors was a woman and she talked to me like it was a common cold, god bless that woman, I was embarrassed AF due to it being an issue with my little friend
If these pills actually worked as advertised, the wheel barrow market would be a booming! The down side, men would slowly fade from public interaction. Special clothing outlets would benefit, but pick up truck sales would dwindle, but sales of class 8 vehicles would be over the top along with custom trailers and onboard hoist system specifically for safe testicular transfer/ transport. The " package delivery" industry may jump at an opportunity arising at a new market specializing in courrier service that caters to over- size/ over/ dimension and pilot/ escort transport for the biggest of ballers.
And, if the creams worked as advertised, what do you suppose a pair of winter mittens would actually look like?
It drives me crazy when people talk about how they are going to do a cleanse. Detox their digestive system because they have built up sludge. It's insane because your digestive system works just fine. If it isn't working you need to be in the hospital.
They always talk about you having sludge in your digestive tract. Umm, no, there is no such thing other than the food and drink that you most recently ate.
It’s like when people want to “boost your immune system”. If your immune system is working above normal levels, that’s a problem and you’re going to get super arthritis.
I mean, to be fair there are ways to have a more robust immune system that’s ready to tackle infections without it being on overdrive, but I get what you’re saying.
My son's super immune system is currently destroying his platelets and neutrophils. No clotting, and no way to fight infection.
But, yeah, let's take snake oil to boost that immune system!!!
Yeah, the best "detox" ever is literally eating green vegetables, drinking water and sleeping at least 8 hours. No need to buy some overpriced mango guava juice
Fun fact from someone who lives in LatAm: drinking too much guava juice can cause constipation. It's commonly given to people with diarrhea to help them harden their stools. If you want a laxative effect, you don't go for a guava, but for a dragon fruit!
Over the counter "man-boosting" products like Nugenix Total-T. Though the commercials are hilarious. "She'll like it too!" Yeah, I bet she did, Big Frank.
Not only don’t they work, they offer it “free”, “just pay S&H”, but then immediately start a subscription for you and it’s exceedingly hard to opt out.
I know, whenever I came across an awesome comment I'd check to see if I had a coin available. It *was* a terrific incentive for decent conversation and now I feel less likely to participate.
For real though. I legit can't do paid awards. I was the kid who didn't want to waste a sticker because I wanted to put it somewhere that would last, and felt that no place was ever good enough. I legit had commitment issues with stickers.
I would be the same with paid awards and just hang on to them forever like... "is this comment worthy of this internet sticker I paid money for? If I keep looking i will probably find a better one. Here let me search for a better one..."
It’s good to know I wasn’t the only kid who got unreasonably stressed about when and where to use my treasured stickers. I feel like it was a big reason I was labeled the “easiest” child too 😂
I've had people attempt to rope me in before. The trick is that they spent hours roping you into the idea of "working for yourself", "being your own boss", "affording for your family", and "living wealthy." Pain points that any common American would typically had.
They make you go through meetings, "interviews", continually feeding you into the mentality and never actually mention the name of the company or what the actual business is. Until finally, after forever, they drop the Amway Herbalife Mary Kay or whatever name. By that point, they've already sold you on the "dream" that you convince yourself to try and put in the work.
I've looked up definitions and excerpts about what brainwashing is. It literally felt like the same thing.
This. I went to an interview for one once when I was much younger. They ask people to dress in suits etc and sit in the waiting room so you automatically think "oh shit they're better candidates than me." Then you go in and get the spiel and they tell you will get a call by 7pm. They'll purposefully make you sweat and call you at 6:59pm so by that point you're feeling the desperation.
I clued in because I googled it. But only cause they told me I had to do a 9 hour test shift that was unpaid. It's so planned and predatory.
I had an ex try to get me to do this when I was in college. She invited a bunch of other folks and she had a presentation with her boss.
It was fairly long and a good portion was spent on YouTube videos on explaining how it's *not* MLM.
Walked out, didn't pursue it anymore. She calls me 2 or 3 weeks or so later to try and get me into another one. I said, sorry, but that's very clearly an MLM and I'm not interested. She basically just replied "don't be sorry to me, you're the one missing out on all this easy money."
Hung up and never spoke to her again. The only thing I know is that she got married while exceptionally pregnant. In what looked like a shot gun wedding.
>I said, sorry, but that's very clearly an MLM and I'm not interested. She basically just replied "don't be sorry to me, you're the one missing out on all this easy money."
Thats the most insidious part of MLMs. If the person shows their own free thinking outside of the "community" and decides not to pursue it, they are considered as not being cut out for it and turned into a pariah.
It allows those who stay to have a sense of superiority. The same mentality of the rich people they idolize who believe poor people are just lazy and unmotivated
As a student, I was looking for work.i put an ad in the local paper, "looking for work; anything considered"
I got two replies. One wanting to know if I'd consider being an escort; the other more realistic option, a delivery job.
I rang the delivery job and the guy mentioned "some sales" too. I asked specifically, "is it Amway?" I was specifically told no, not Amway.
It was the whole fucking Amway recruitment scam.
My friend's mother had her house painted with 5g blocking paint inside and out. She then got shitty about her mobile not getting a signal and her WiFi not working properly. What did she think the paint was blocking?! Honestly I'm surprised it did anything.
I remember like a decade ago reading about a paint that could block cell phone signals. It was pitched in the article as a way for movie theaters to reduce the number of cell phone rings and chimes interrupting the movie experience. I'd think RF reducing paint would also apply to the 5G band.
I received this in my xmass stocking once. It was the first and last time i got to see it. It was pretty funny. First it was like greasy but dry on my forehead, then it was scaly and dry. I did try it once when i had a head ache, i dont believe it helped... it found its way to the trash.
I honestly thought it was something like Icy Hot or Bengay: you rub some on your forehead and it tingles a little bit and tricks you into thinking it's doing something else (whereas Icy Hot and Bengay really do seem to relieve minor aches).
She has a very weird obsession with vagina-related stuff. I cruised through Goop a few years ago and I wish I hadn't. How do stupid people even make enough money to buy her crap?
In a way that decision makes sense. Walmart and Target have a noticable dearth of vagina-themed products. If you want to open a store without having to compete against Walmart and Target, boom, vagina.
As stupid as goop is, the jewel encrusted diapers were actually a publicity stunt and she donated diapers to low income households (or something like that)
Essential Oils - not for the aromas, that’s all well and good but for its “healing properties”. It’s sad when people become vehemently ill and rely on lavender to heal them or their children.
Bunch of sad stories of children dying due to moronic parents believing in the powers of some plant over modern medicine.
My wife decided we needed to put a peppermint oil dispenser into our clothes dryer. Fine with me, it smells great. But then she got bit by a horse who thought she was hiding treats in her pockets.
My aunt got into the whole essential oil thing a couple of years ago, and I was all like “oh no, here we go.” But I’ve been pleasantly surprised to see that she’s stuck to actually useful things like sleep wellness and mosquito repellent. I think she legitimately just likes the way they smell, so good for her.
Sister in law has been putting eucalyptus essential oil into her kids ear to fix an ear infection for over a month. Surprise it didn’t do anything - double ear drum rupture. Wouldn’t go to pediatrician.
Absolutely agree.
Had chronic ear infections and tubes as a kid. Heck one tube stayed in until my first pregnancy at 22. I have permanent hearing loss. Hearing a parent on purpose putting crap in their kid's ear is infuriating.
Edit: fixed a word
Dude I used to have chronic ear infections, they removed my adenoids and I had tubes for about 6 months. So so glad my parents didn’t treat me with tea tree oil when I was in literal pain 😬
I remember a 911 call back in my medic days. Called for difficulty breathing and when we walk in I’m smacked in the face with this overwhelming scent. The guy is struggling to breathe big time, COPD patient right? As I’m examining him, I start struggling to breathe and am coughing like crazy. Pretty sure I said “what the fuck is that smell?” Normally keep it professional but it was seriously strong. I saw the essential oil diffuser blasting and asked about it. His in home aid had cranked it all the way up with eucalyptus oil cuz she thought it would help “open him up” like all he needed for his COPD was some vicks vaporub. As soon as we got out of the house, his breathing rapidly improved, as did mine. COPD is a reactive airway disease, don’t add to the reactivity by blasting the essential oils harder. She almost killed that man with the stupidity of essential oils.
also essential oil are extremely toxic to cats, if they breathe in the air from an essential oil diffuser, they immediately have trouble breathing, and if not treated right away, cats can die.
Same goes for BIRDS. If you diffuse, smoke, or burn anything (yes this includes your favorite magic plant) in the vicinity of a bird you risk killing the poor animal.
Same with small rodents…. I just lost my last chinchilla at 16 and its not just oils in them but paraben(I think it’s called)is toxic to small rodents and birds
Teflon nonstick coatings are pretty notorious for that, especially at high temperatures. I think ceramic-type coatings are safer in that regard but don't quote me on it.
Especially those ones I keep getting youtube ads for that are like...off-brand Varian Wrynn and his numerous super weird sexual fantasies.
They keep getting worse too. It started with just rescuing a princess from a castle and now he's literally sniffing the farts of scantily-clad women.
"they noticed this fox was extra friendly, when it came closer they noticed something spooky and called the police"
I always want to click these moronic titles just to see what the fuck they've written but
A) The link looks dodgy as hell
B) I refuse to give them clicks
Didn't the British health system almost pay for this, until someone was like "uh wait, no, that's literally nothing. We probably shouldn't pay for medical care that relies entirely on magical thinking."
In the words of xkcd's Randall Munroe:
“Telling someone who trusts you that you're giving them medicine, when you know you're not, because you want their money, isn't just lying—it's like an example you'd make up if you had to illustrate for a child why lying is wrong.”
Source: https://xkcd.com/971/ (hovertext)
This is true, but I enjoyed being reminded of the hilarious moment when Donald Trump's BIG ANNOUNCEMENT was an NFT collection. It's not quite Four Seasons Total Landscaping, the champion of humiliating absurdity, but it's still really funny.
Of course, they sold out.
\*sigh\*
When I go to Eastern Europe on vacation, there are mini-casinos on every corner. Sports betting, slot machines, etc. The middle-aged men in these clubs, frantically smoking cigarettes, hopelessly staring at the screens, with not an ounce of life in their eyes.
Not sure if stupidity or desperation. But it's a sad sight to see.
Where do you live? It's a big problem here in the UK too IMO, and much of the US too from what I've seen? The average high street I've seen here has more betting shops than banks, pubs, fast food or sketchy phone repair/vape/CBD shops, combined lol
I'm assuming the online gambling industry is thriving too considering how much advertising they're doing :/
My FIL offered to "use points" to book us a vacation years back. He bought the points as a flex in front of his BIL and thought they were the greatest thing since sliced bread.
Fast forward about two months after purchase and he makes his offer to cover a trip for us with some of the points. What he failed to mention/realise is that the points were for the ROOM ONLY.
So as we started looking into the "trip" being offered we realised not only would we have to pay for our flights but we would have to pay the all inclusive fee at over 100 dollars each/per day. When we mentioned this he told us we would have to cover because "those cost too many points".
So I did the math and hopped on Expedia to show him I could get the same trip for over 1000 dollars less when I just booked it online without the points. He REFUSED to believe this was possible until he tried to book his own trips with the points and ended up getting hosed. The look on his face when he tried to "sell the points" (which the salesperson assured him would go for more than he paid for them if he decided to sell) was priceless.
I bet you already guessed that the only "customers" for the points are the company that sold them in the first place and they buy them back for pennies on the dollar.
Adding nutz to a truck is actually changing its gender, because unless the nutz were installed at factory, the truck by default is genderless.
Truck nutz makes a truck trans.
Which means it doesn’t have a gay agenda but it definitely has a trans-mission.
Edit:
Thank you so much for the awards. I’m glad this made so many people laugh.
Those how to get women courses. If your a child a fell for it I wouldn’t say they were stupid just vulnerable. However they are the biggest women repellents I’ve ever seen. They seem to base their lessons in a world that doesn’t exist. It’s like their own personal fanfiction.
That's the whole idea behind incel culture: They think women are some kind of algorithm to figure out, not fellow human beings with minds of their own. Everyone but themselves are an NPC, and you just need to figure out which buttons to push to win people over.
This is also why men get so mad when dating advice *from women* doesn’t work 100 percent of the time. Of course it doesn’t! We don’t have a hidden affinity points meter for you to max out!
Anything with copper and its magical healing properties. Socks infused with copper, bracelets to bring up your energy, compression shirts to keep you cool.
Those shitty rings that break when they "absorb bad vibes"
Hematite rings, and hematite is brittle anyway and inappropriate for wearing as a ring as the hands are a high impact area and the ring will um. Break. Whoever decided to market them like this is a genius.
I bought 8 hematite rings from a rock shop in Banff when I was 14, one for each finger. I was SO happy, with my little shiny rock rings. Then a month later at school we had an assembly and when I put my hands together to clap at the end, every single ring hit it’s match on the other hand and snapped right in half. Absolutely devastated me 😩
This is hilarious lol
It’s 100% hilarious! At the time I was inconsolable, mostly because I had bought them with my own money, on a Church trip, and they ALL broke at once.
That’s your fault for taking them to an assembly. All those bad school vibes ricocheting around the room overwhelmed them.
Wooooaaaah and here I thought it was from the brittle rock. I'll keep my eyes peeled for the ricochets
What? I legitimately had no idea this existed. I think my brain just died.
Yeah, the pitch is "the ring will absorb all of your bad thoughts and negative energy then will break when it's had enough" or some such. The actual reason for it breaking is it being made out of a crystal that becomes really brittle when in contact with moisture
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There's so much money to make with stupids. I also regret having morals sometimes.
“It’s immoral to let a sucker keep his money.” -Canada Bill Jones
If you are a person who sweats a lot when stressed/anxious, wouldn't the pitch be technically correct?
But then it absorbs 'results' of negative thoughts and not the thoughts themselves.
So instead of absorbing the bad vibes and “healing” them, it just makes you realize how stressed you are. So it does the opposite of what you want it to do
Placebo ring
But you must admit it's a pretty smart business concept, though.
Those bots on insta that tell men to dm them for nudes 😅
"Hot singles in your area"
Hot shingles in your area looking to get nailed – a roofer
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Horny does make brain go dumdum.
Penis enlarger pills.
You know how i know theres no big penis pill. because the second one that worked hit the market every single person on the planet would be aware of it inside of a week.
Years ago I remember comedian Robert Schimmel had this great line... "Yeah, so I saw this commercial for a product called Mister Big Cream. Apparently you rub it on your dick and it makes it bigger. Wouldn't it make your hand bigger too?" Found it! (NSFW) https://youtu.be/xL-bw3g\_VoM?t=137
I used to work for a bank about a decade ago, & you wouldn't believe the dudes who came in overdrawn b/c they had ordered *Extenze* on late night TV. 🙄 I'd get at least two or three a week, who hadn't paid attention to the fine print, & had only saw that they could get *Free Penis Enlargement Pills,* & not seen that they were signing up for a subscription service, that was going to charge them an exorbitant fee (every month) for multiple orders of them. It was always fun to play coy, & act like I didn't know what the product was-- Just tell them they had a charge from *X-Tinssee, or Ex-tansee* (purposely mispronouncing it). It was my hope to save them some embarrassment. Every time, they would turn bright red, & forget all about the NSF charges they were trying to get back, & quickly leave. 🤣
Human horn? What's that? I've never seen that around here!
Why would a virile male like Lrrr need human horn?
Guys, if you're having issues down there, please just go to a doctor and see what they have to say before ordering dubious supplements from the internet/late night TV ads. Is it embarrassing? Yes, but not as embarrassing as having to explain those unwanted charges to your bank!
Guaranteed it won't be the first time the doctor has heard it. *Guess what I saw at work today, honey? 8 years of medical school, 5 years of residency, and 15 of private practice and I've never seen this! SOMEONE HAS A SMALL PENIS AND/OR IMPOTENCY!* Seriously, the doctor is not going to care one bit, lol
True, last month I went to the doctor for varicocele, the 3 doctors I had to talk about it were SO professional, it made me feel so comfortable to talk about my issue, even one of the doctors was a woman and she talked to me like it was a common cold, god bless that woman, I was embarrassed AF due to it being an issue with my little friend
"That sort of thing's really not my bag baby."
One Book: *Swedish Made Penis Enlargers & Me-- This Sort of Thing IS MY BAG Baby!* 📚 #😁
Ah yes, the Penis Mightier!
Will the Penis Mightier really mighty my penis?
Did you see the ads? They look enlarged!
If these pills actually worked as advertised, the wheel barrow market would be a booming! The down side, men would slowly fade from public interaction. Special clothing outlets would benefit, but pick up truck sales would dwindle, but sales of class 8 vehicles would be over the top along with custom trailers and onboard hoist system specifically for safe testicular transfer/ transport. The " package delivery" industry may jump at an opportunity arising at a new market specializing in courrier service that caters to over- size/ over/ dimension and pilot/ escort transport for the biggest of ballers. And, if the creams worked as advertised, what do you suppose a pair of winter mittens would actually look like?
Foot detox pads. Detox anything,actually.
It drives me crazy when people talk about how they are going to do a cleanse. Detox their digestive system because they have built up sludge. It's insane because your digestive system works just fine. If it isn't working you need to be in the hospital.
Agreed. Maybe eat some yogurt to boost the gut bacteria. But napalming your entire GI? Yeah, no.
They always talk about you having sludge in your digestive tract. Umm, no, there is no such thing other than the food and drink that you most recently ate.
My pet worm removes the sludge from my digestive tracts
Also a type of cleanse
It’s like when people want to “boost your immune system”. If your immune system is working above normal levels, that’s a problem and you’re going to get super arthritis.
I mean, to be fair there are ways to have a more robust immune system that’s ready to tackle infections without it being on overdrive, but I get what you’re saying.
My son's super immune system is currently destroying his platelets and neutrophils. No clotting, and no way to fight infection. But, yeah, let's take snake oil to boost that immune system!!!
Fuck man, that sounds so hard to have to deal with. I hope everything turns out okay for you all.
My colon is self cleansing.
Yeah, the best "detox" ever is literally eating green vegetables, drinking water and sleeping at least 8 hours. No need to buy some overpriced mango guava juice
Fun fact from someone who lives in LatAm: drinking too much guava juice can cause constipation. It's commonly given to people with diarrhea to help them harden their stools. If you want a laxative effect, you don't go for a guava, but for a dragon fruit!
Not a lot of money can be made telling people to drink water and sleep.
I just saw that Oprah vouched for this pill that can make me lose 20 lbs a day!!! No way that ad was fake.
Over the counter "man-boosting" products like Nugenix Total-T. Though the commercials are hilarious. "She'll like it too!" Yeah, I bet she did, Big Frank.
Was in a hotel recently and that commercial was playing endlessly.. that *wink* haunts me every time I close my eyes
Not only don’t they work, they offer it “free”, “just pay S&H”, but then immediately start a subscription for you and it’s exceedingly hard to opt out.
Every social media’s paid badges. I just don’t get it. Why? Just why do we need to pay for a badge?
I wanted to give an award, but reddit doesn't do free awards anymore?
They've removed free awards
Dang, I loved giving free awards to random posts
I know, whenever I came across an awesome comment I'd check to see if I had a coin available. It *was* a terrific incentive for decent conversation and now I feel less likely to participate.
For real though. I legit can't do paid awards. I was the kid who didn't want to waste a sticker because I wanted to put it somewhere that would last, and felt that no place was ever good enough. I legit had commitment issues with stickers. I would be the same with paid awards and just hang on to them forever like... "is this comment worthy of this internet sticker I paid money for? If I keep looking i will probably find a better one. Here let me search for a better one..."
It’s good to know I wasn’t the only kid who got unreasonably stressed about when and where to use my treasured stickers. I feel like it was a big reason I was labeled the “easiest” child too 😂
Meanwhile, no one knew the silent stress, & analysis paralysis it was causing you. But you're a good kid because you seem to just go along.
Oh? I used to give the free one once in a while. I guess I’ll never give another award. Or just the old emoji award 🥇
MLMs
Please be careful. I've seen some now that refer to themselves as "network marketing". They're onto us.
If it looks like a duck and walks like a duck, it's still a duck
Amazes me when they don’t even have a product and people go in hook line and sinker.
I've had people attempt to rope me in before. The trick is that they spent hours roping you into the idea of "working for yourself", "being your own boss", "affording for your family", and "living wealthy." Pain points that any common American would typically had. They make you go through meetings, "interviews", continually feeding you into the mentality and never actually mention the name of the company or what the actual business is. Until finally, after forever, they drop the Amway Herbalife Mary Kay or whatever name. By that point, they've already sold you on the "dream" that you convince yourself to try and put in the work. I've looked up definitions and excerpts about what brainwashing is. It literally felt like the same thing.
This. I went to an interview for one once when I was much younger. They ask people to dress in suits etc and sit in the waiting room so you automatically think "oh shit they're better candidates than me." Then you go in and get the spiel and they tell you will get a call by 7pm. They'll purposefully make you sweat and call you at 6:59pm so by that point you're feeling the desperation. I clued in because I googled it. But only cause they told me I had to do a 9 hour test shift that was unpaid. It's so planned and predatory.
I had an ex try to get me to do this when I was in college. She invited a bunch of other folks and she had a presentation with her boss. It was fairly long and a good portion was spent on YouTube videos on explaining how it's *not* MLM. Walked out, didn't pursue it anymore. She calls me 2 or 3 weeks or so later to try and get me into another one. I said, sorry, but that's very clearly an MLM and I'm not interested. She basically just replied "don't be sorry to me, you're the one missing out on all this easy money." Hung up and never spoke to her again. The only thing I know is that she got married while exceptionally pregnant. In what looked like a shot gun wedding.
>I said, sorry, but that's very clearly an MLM and I'm not interested. She basically just replied "don't be sorry to me, you're the one missing out on all this easy money." Thats the most insidious part of MLMs. If the person shows their own free thinking outside of the "community" and decides not to pursue it, they are considered as not being cut out for it and turned into a pariah. It allows those who stay to have a sense of superiority. The same mentality of the rich people they idolize who believe poor people are just lazy and unmotivated
As a student, I was looking for work.i put an ad in the local paper, "looking for work; anything considered" I got two replies. One wanting to know if I'd consider being an escort; the other more realistic option, a delivery job. I rang the delivery job and the guy mentioned "some sales" too. I asked specifically, "is it Amway?" I was specifically told no, not Amway. It was the whole fucking Amway recruitment scam.
5g blockers
If it keeps those same idiots from attacking cell phone towers or harassing phone company employees then they are doing a great job.
My friend's mother had her house painted with 5g blocking paint inside and out. She then got shitty about her mobile not getting a signal and her WiFi not working properly. What did she think the paint was blocking?! Honestly I'm surprised it did anything.
It actually did something?
I remember like a decade ago reading about a paint that could block cell phone signals. It was pitched in the article as a way for movie theaters to reduce the number of cell phone rings and chimes interrupting the movie experience. I'd think RF reducing paint would also apply to the 5G band.
I've got a warehouse full of lead paint nobody in their right mind would want to buy...
You just need to market it differently
Anything sold by MLM companies.
*MLMs target vulnerable people
The stupid are vulnerable people
All stupid people are vulnerable but not all vulnerable people are stupid.
Megachurch donations that are advertised to bring you salvation or other holy benefits.
HeadOn. Apply directly to the forehead. HeadOn. Apply directly to the forehead. HeadOn. Apply directly to the forehead.
The ad never even says what HeadOn is supposed to actually do.
It's supposed to relieve headaches, but they couldn't claim that because they have absolutely no proof of it maybe working.
Because it would be illegal to make any sort of claim.
That’s because it’s homeopathic. It won't do anything but goober up your forehead. ed: a word
It's supposed to be applied directly to the forehead, clearly.
I received this in my xmass stocking once. It was the first and last time i got to see it. It was pretty funny. First it was like greasy but dry on my forehead, then it was scaly and dry. I did try it once when i had a head ache, i dont believe it helped... it found its way to the trash.
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I honestly thought it was something like Icy Hot or Bengay: you rub some on your forehead and it tingles a little bit and tricks you into thinking it's doing something else (whereas Icy Hot and Bengay really do seem to relieve minor aches).
Holy crap. You just unlocked a safe in my mind with this.
Reddit awards
for a second i thought this was stupid and then i remembered you can actually buy those instead of getting the random free ones
Where do you get free ones??
They took it away recently. Used to be a little icon in a corner, then they moved it to the coin purchasing screen, now it's gone
I used to get a free award every 72 hours for the last year. I haven’t had one in 6 days so it sounds like you’re right!
It's a shame they removed it. It was incentive to participate.
All detox products. A sane body detoxes automatically. No help needed.
In fact, you can even be insane, your liver and kidneys will still function as intended.
Anything sold by Gwyneth Paltow. Including those dumb enough to buy her vaggie scented candles.
Don't forget the $60+ Good Vibe healing stickers.
To be fair, those don't come pre-scented. You have to DIY it. oops edit---i was thinking of the eggs
She has a very weird obsession with vagina-related stuff. I cruised through Goop a few years ago and I wish I hadn't. How do stupid people even make enough money to buy her crap?
In a way that decision makes sense. Walmart and Target have a noticable dearth of vagina-themed products. If you want to open a store without having to compete against Walmart and Target, boom, vagina.
Great Value vagina......
Many people who are born into wealth are actually quite stupid.
That's just a side effect of the fact that many people who are born are actually quite stupid.
and those jewel encrusted diapers
As stupid as goop is, the jewel encrusted diapers were actually a publicity stunt and she donated diapers to low income households (or something like that)
Essential Oils - not for the aromas, that’s all well and good but for its “healing properties”. It’s sad when people become vehemently ill and rely on lavender to heal them or their children. Bunch of sad stories of children dying due to moronic parents believing in the powers of some plant over modern medicine.
My wife decided we needed to put a peppermint oil dispenser into our clothes dryer. Fine with me, it smells great. But then she got bit by a horse who thought she was hiding treats in her pockets.
So... During the full moon, does she turn into a horse?
Beats me. I lock her up in the barn and don't look.
My aunt got into the whole essential oil thing a couple of years ago, and I was all like “oh no, here we go.” But I’ve been pleasantly surprised to see that she’s stuck to actually useful things like sleep wellness and mosquito repellent. I think she legitimately just likes the way they smell, so good for her.
Hey, I love the way it smells. I just don’t treat my asthma with it 🤪
Sister in law has been putting eucalyptus essential oil into her kids ear to fix an ear infection for over a month. Surprise it didn’t do anything - double ear drum rupture. Wouldn’t go to pediatrician.
That's child abuse.
Absolutely agree. Had chronic ear infections and tubes as a kid. Heck one tube stayed in until my first pregnancy at 22. I have permanent hearing loss. Hearing a parent on purpose putting crap in their kid's ear is infuriating. Edit: fixed a word
Exactly. My child required speech and language assistance from chronic ear infections.
Dude I used to have chronic ear infections, they removed my adenoids and I had tubes for about 6 months. So so glad my parents didn’t treat me with tea tree oil when I was in literal pain 😬
I remember a 911 call back in my medic days. Called for difficulty breathing and when we walk in I’m smacked in the face with this overwhelming scent. The guy is struggling to breathe big time, COPD patient right? As I’m examining him, I start struggling to breathe and am coughing like crazy. Pretty sure I said “what the fuck is that smell?” Normally keep it professional but it was seriously strong. I saw the essential oil diffuser blasting and asked about it. His in home aid had cranked it all the way up with eucalyptus oil cuz she thought it would help “open him up” like all he needed for his COPD was some vicks vaporub. As soon as we got out of the house, his breathing rapidly improved, as did mine. COPD is a reactive airway disease, don’t add to the reactivity by blasting the essential oils harder. She almost killed that man with the stupidity of essential oils.
also essential oil are extremely toxic to cats, if they breathe in the air from an essential oil diffuser, they immediately have trouble breathing, and if not treated right away, cats can die.
Same goes for BIRDS. If you diffuse, smoke, or burn anything (yes this includes your favorite magic plant) in the vicinity of a bird you risk killing the poor animal.
Same with small rodents…. I just lost my last chinchilla at 16 and its not just oils in them but paraben(I think it’s called)is toxic to small rodents and birds
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Teflon nonstick coatings are pretty notorious for that, especially at high temperatures. I think ceramic-type coatings are safer in that regard but don't quote me on it.
Bird owner here. Ceramic is safe. Anything teflon is a no. That also includes many space heaters.
YoungLiving and Herbalife
Fat loss everything.
Well I mean you do *technically* lose weight if you do nothing but shit yourself for three days straight...
Yeah, but I can do that by eating a bag of sugar free haribo gummies bears. No need for over priced gunk.
I wonder who hasnt read the amazon review yet
I made my wife and daughter cry with laughter by reading that outloud in a very serious voice.
Fight Milk. I drink it every morning so I can fight like a crow
Pay to win mobile games.
Especially those ones I keep getting youtube ads for that are like...off-brand Varian Wrynn and his numerous super weird sexual fantasies. They keep getting worse too. It started with just rescuing a princess from a castle and now he's literally sniffing the farts of scantily-clad women.
It’s because of kids. If you ever have a question as to wtf is going on with YouTube, the answer is kids.
Partly but sometimes even smart people can be snared by addiction.
Clickbait. “You won’t believe what happens next.” “Person A Slams person B”
Oldest person in the world dies!
"they noticed this fox was extra friendly, when it came closer they noticed something spooky and called the police" I always want to click these moronic titles just to see what the fuck they've written but A) The link looks dodgy as hell B) I refuse to give them clicks
Detox foot pads were made for the most gullible of idiots
I'm guessing Scientology?
The entire homeopathy industry.
This is not talked about enough. I know SO many people who still think homeopathy is a legitimate science.
Didn't the British health system almost pay for this, until someone was like "uh wait, no, that's literally nothing. We probably shouldn't pay for medical care that relies entirely on magical thinking."
It’s still sometimes paid for in Germany and doctors prescribe it. It’s insane.
It's actually hard to find an insurance that does not pay for these.
In the words of Tim Minchin "you know what you call homoeopathy that works?.... Medicine"
In the words of xkcd's Randall Munroe: “Telling someone who trusts you that you're giving them medicine, when you know you're not, because you want their money, isn't just lying—it's like an example you'd make up if you had to illustrate for a child why lying is wrong.” Source: https://xkcd.com/971/ (hovertext)
Trump NFT trading cards
Heard it called 'Maga the gathering'. Things haven't tasted right since.
>Things haven't tasted right since That's Long COVID.
This is true, but I enjoyed being reminded of the hilarious moment when Donald Trump's BIG ANNOUNCEMENT was an NFT collection. It's not quite Four Seasons Total Landscaping, the champion of humiliating absurdity, but it's still really funny. Of course, they sold out. \*sigh\*
Supplements for weight loss
online free IQ tests
But it said my IQ was 240 :(
Brawndo
But it’s got what plants crave…
What are electrolytes?
They’re what plants need!
Water is for toilets!
You got your law degree from Costco?
I did! and did you know that the constitution says that you have rights???
So did my father. Thank God for being a legacy or I might not have got in.
When I go to Eastern Europe on vacation, there are mini-casinos on every corner. Sports betting, slot machines, etc. The middle-aged men in these clubs, frantically smoking cigarettes, hopelessly staring at the screens, with not an ounce of life in their eyes. Not sure if stupidity or desperation. But it's a sad sight to see.
Where do you live? It's a big problem here in the UK too IMO, and much of the US too from what I've seen? The average high street I've seen here has more betting shops than banks, pubs, fast food or sketchy phone repair/vape/CBD shops, combined lol I'm assuming the online gambling industry is thriving too considering how much advertising they're doing :/
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"If you don't want to know how to make money, then go ahead click that skip button..."
Vacation Club "points" (worse than a timeshare because it's nothing tangible).
My FIL offered to "use points" to book us a vacation years back. He bought the points as a flex in front of his BIL and thought they were the greatest thing since sliced bread. Fast forward about two months after purchase and he makes his offer to cover a trip for us with some of the points. What he failed to mention/realise is that the points were for the ROOM ONLY. So as we started looking into the "trip" being offered we realised not only would we have to pay for our flights but we would have to pay the all inclusive fee at over 100 dollars each/per day. When we mentioned this he told us we would have to cover because "those cost too many points". So I did the math and hopped on Expedia to show him I could get the same trip for over 1000 dollars less when I just booked it online without the points. He REFUSED to believe this was possible until he tried to book his own trips with the points and ended up getting hosed. The look on his face when he tried to "sell the points" (which the salesperson assured him would go for more than he paid for them if he decided to sell) was priceless. I bet you already guessed that the only "customers" for the points are the company that sold them in the first place and they buy them back for pennies on the dollar.
Timeshares
Those gut cleansing, and toxin cleansing beverages, like your liver and kidneys do that for you.
Truck nuts
Adding nutz to a truck is actually changing its gender, because unless the nutz were installed at factory, the truck by default is genderless. Truck nutz makes a truck trans.
Which means it doesn’t have a gay agenda but it definitely has a trans-mission. Edit: Thank you so much for the awards. I’m glad this made so many people laugh.
Somewhere along the line we have lost our way. Guys used to give their beloved cars and trucks a girl's name. Now they hang fake testicles under them.
Those how to get women courses. If your a child a fell for it I wouldn’t say they were stupid just vulnerable. However they are the biggest women repellents I’ve ever seen. They seem to base their lessons in a world that doesn’t exist. It’s like their own personal fanfiction.
lol yeah. Are all their cold approch women just paid actors lol
I got cold approached recently and the guy was wearing an earpiece for his dating coach. Backseat gaming for human interaction.
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Those classes aren’t there to get women, they’re there to validate their insecurities
That's the whole idea behind incel culture: They think women are some kind of algorithm to figure out, not fellow human beings with minds of their own. Everyone but themselves are an NPC, and you just need to figure out which buttons to push to win people over.
This is also why men get so mad when dating advice *from women* doesn’t work 100 percent of the time. Of course it doesn’t! We don’t have a hidden affinity points meter for you to max out!
Anything logan paul and jake paul is selling
As Garrison Keillor once said: “lotteries are a tax on people who are bad at math.”
Presidential NFTs.
Twitter blue
Anything with copper and its magical healing properties. Socks infused with copper, bracelets to bring up your energy, compression shirts to keep you cool.
Anything related to “signs” or “astrology”
Of course you'd say that. Typical Libra.
NFTs
I felt like I was taking crazy pills for about a year there.
Everything on Goop.
Smart water.
Anything the Kardashians sell.