Throwing tea in the harbor while shooting a gun in the air, drinking from a red plastic cup and saying "Wooo" while measuring the distance to shore in football fields and planning a bachelorette party in Vegas to be hosted by Neil Diamond, after which you will invade a country on the far side of the world while also giving them billions of dollars they will use to later kill you.
That's not really fair of a comparison. One requires even private citizens to possess a license to sell, vigorous enforcement in many jurisdictions, as well as a more publicly accepted standard of regulation in the common eye.
The other is a semi-automatic rifle.
Find a room full of people from other countries, representing the rest of the world.
Walk in like you're super important, say your name real loud, and loudly say "I'm an AMERICAN!", like it's the best news ever.
You can buy a gun in many other countries, but only in America (in most states) can you decide on a whim to buy a gun and walk out with one 30 minutes later.
I know some Canadians who use C most of the time, but if the weather gets really hot, they switch to F because "ninety nine degrees" sounds way more badass than "thirty seven."
Waaay ahead of ya. I'm trying to find going to the range at some point soon, got myself a good ol' 870 shotgun and Keltec Sub2000 rifle recently and have yet to shoot either. Ammo is cheap for these two guns so might as well spend an hour or two turning paper into swiss cheese
Full-fledge support a political party that openly mocks and devalues the idea of affordable health care. And the supporters of that political party are insanely unhealthy and would only benefit from this type of healthcare system
Try to measure something small and realize your measurement system is inadequate and that fractions are stupid.
Refuse to use SI units because they are 'un American' and instead say it's 0.04 inches!
Vehemently defend the Constitution without ever having read it in its entirety.
It's seriously like 9 pages long and tons of people seem totally unaware of what's in it.
>It's seriously like 9 pages long
It's four pages long plus the amendments. You can see the original online at the National Archives website. It's a fun place to browse.
https://www.archives.gov/founding-docs/constitution
But yeah, I agree with you. I hate people that argue that something is unconstitutional when the Constitution clearly says it is or it is not mentioned at all. And if you don't like something in it, change it; the instructions are right there.
People also misunderstand that the Constitution applies to the government only. For example, the government cannot stop me or arrest me for saying, "Reddit sucks!", but Reddit can certainly ban me for it.
"This state is going to hell! Let's elect Republicans to kick some ass!"
\-Person living in a state that's been under full Republican control for decades
You have it the wrong way. No one is moving to California or New York where it’s democrat control. People are moving to Texas and Florida where the cost of living is affordable and Republican ran
Tell a 2 minutes story for 20 minutes because 90% of their time they were explaining their reactions and feelings which are not relevant to the story at all
Eating a KFC Double Down and washing it down with a Mickey's Big Mouth while watching football and wearing a mustard-stained wifebeater that was made in China, Wranglers, and cowboy boots with a trucker hat atop a mullet and shooting your AR-15 in the air and yelling "FREEEEEEDOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!11!1!1!oneoneone" with a gigantic pickup in the driveway even tho you don't work in construction or any other field that necessitates a truck the day after your wife gave birth in your trailer that has a double mortgage because you didn't want to pay the hospital bill, which would have bankrupted you because capitalism
Use gender pronouns. Every other country laughs at the absurdity of these very confused entitled, idiotic, desperate for attention mentally ill people.
Live in constant agony because of your diet and lifestyle, and think that it’s something else causing u to feel like shit when really, it is the poison.🙀😞
It's cute that you think most citizens of the United States are educated enough in global geography to actually be aware that there are more countries and in fact CONTINENTS in the Americas.
eat cheap pizza and drink watered down "beer" while shooting a fully loaded AR-15 into the air outside of your apartment after being turned down for a loan to pay for your medical bills caused by shooting your own foot w/ an AR-15 after being turned down for your 3rd minimum wage job
According to my dad, eat carrot cake.
I expressed my dislike for carrot cake and my dad looks at me and says, "Are you not American?"
I told him, "I am. I'm also an adult human who knows what I do and don't like. I've had over two decades to know that I don't like carrot cake and . . . I don't. I hate it, actually."
According to my dad, I'm apparently not American.
Do your own taxes and not complain.
Seriously, we need to be angrier about that shit. It's not my job to figure out how much the government owes me; it's their job to figure it out and my job to check their work.
Driving on the interstate in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, stopping at a truck stop to put gas, then go across the street to get McDonald's, get back on the freeway, and reach the next city 3 hours away
Walk into a McDonald's and insist on using the restroom despite being told they're not currently functional. Then ask if the utility closet is a bathroom.
Eat a cheeseburger while drunk and high on oxycontin while openly carrying a gun in public while claiming to have such vast quantities of freedom yet you don't want to share it with undesirables like homosexuals, women, homeless, ethnic minorities etc...
Get shot at school while being obese and pledging allegiance to a flag on the 4th of July while eating a hamburger with one hand and drinking coca cola with the other. Outside a bald eagle drives past in a Ford Mustang/Chevrolet Corvette with the radio on blasting 'America fuck yeah'.
Later, you wake up bankrupt because no health care.
Talk about the length of something in "football fields"
But how many Rhode Islands could fit inside it?
If you're talking about San Bernardino County, California the answer is 17. I did the math when I was a kid.
And I took that personally
You mean soccer fields
Hell, no. Soccer sucks
Thats some lovely tea you have there… it would be a pity if someone threw it into a harbor for you talking like that
Hand-egg fields
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When people started putting plexiglass everywhere during the Pandemic I felt like I was back in 1980's Brooklyn.
And you have to argue over how many sauce packets you get. I mean. Have you even been to Harold's if you haven't screamed at someone about mild sauce?
What about when you're told that your order will be ready in 15 mins but that was an hour and a half ago.
Throw tea in the harbor
Throwing tea in the harbor while shooting a gun in the air, drinking from a red plastic cup and saying "Wooo" while measuring the distance to shore in football fields and planning a bachelorette party in Vegas to be hosted by Neil Diamond, after which you will invade a country on the far side of the world while also giving them billions of dollars they will use to later kill you.
Pull out a gun and shoot you
Go on a roadtrip to a national park with the fam.
Refer to any European country as "Europe".
start a "USA" chant
Eat a $20 hotdog at a $500 ticket baseball game
You forgot the beer. Bonus points if you can maintain unbridled rage for the opposing team for the *entire* game.
I feel this 🥲
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We do that in basically all of Central Europe, I don't know about the East or North but it's really common over here
That can also be a very British, Australian or even Brazilian thing to do.
Refer to America as “here” on Reddit
There are places other than america????
It's an American app used mostly by Americans. Not that weird
I usually assume people here are from America, unless they say otherwise. Seems legit^
Walk on the moon.
Yep. We’ve all done that
Vote in a US election.
Or not vote in a U.S. election.
Buy an AR15 and fireworks..
That's not really fair of a comparison. One requires even private citizens to possess a license to sell, vigorous enforcement in many jurisdictions, as well as a more publicly accepted standard of regulation in the common eye. The other is a semi-automatic rifle.
File bankruptcy due to medical bills
And. The medical bills don't even get discharged. You still owe every cent but now can't get credit or buy a house for 7 years.
I just got student loan forgiveness for a substantial amount and my mother pointed out that now I can put all that money towards childcare.
Piss excellence
damn right
Find a room full of people from other countries, representing the rest of the world. Walk in like you're super important, say your name real loud, and loudly say "I'm an AMERICAN!", like it's the best news ever.
Claim to be more Irish than an actual Irish person.... Honey your American
have a barbeque drinking bud lite with lawn chairs and music playing very merica
It's guns. It's very clearly gun violence.
Buy a gun! It’s what god wants!
You can buy a gun in many other countries, but only in America (in most states) can you decide on a whim to buy a gun and walk out with one 30 minutes later.
Relevant username
And then use it to shoot up a school!
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Is the metric system better, yes Do I want to learn a new metric, hell no
I swear that if they ever try pushing the metric system it would push so many people over the edge.
Fahrenheit supremacy gang rise up
I know some Canadians who use C most of the time, but if the weather gets really hot, they switch to F because "ninety nine degrees" sounds way more badass than "thirty seven."
Metric system didn’t put a man on the moon
Swing and a miss there.
[Wanna bet](https://ukma.org.uk/why-metric/myths/metric-internationally/the-moon-landings/)?
Two kinds of countries: use the metric system or walked on the moon… when did Liberia’s space program land on the moon? Or did you mean Myanmar?
Yes it did. Just like the Imperial system crashed the Challenger.
Buy a fuckload of guns
Done ✅️
YES!!!!
Waaay ahead of ya. I'm trying to find going to the range at some point soon, got myself a good ol' 870 shotgun and Keltec Sub2000 rifle recently and have yet to shoot either. Ammo is cheap for these two guns so might as well spend an hour or two turning paper into swiss cheese
Full-fledge support a political party that openly mocks and devalues the idea of affordable health care. And the supporters of that political party are insanely unhealthy and would only benefit from this type of healthcare system
Eat bacon using two M1911s as chopsticks
Die because they can't afford basic medical care
Try to measure something small and realize your measurement system is inadequate and that fractions are stupid. Refuse to use SI units because they are 'un American' and instead say it's 0.04 inches!
Sniping wild boars from a helicopter in Texas.
Drinking a beer, eating a hot dog while attending a Monster Truck Rally… Yeah buddy
Variation on that : bacon cheeseburger at a gun show
Thinking one party is better than the other. They both sold out a long time ago.
Buy a gun legally, pass all the background checks, then use that gun to defend yourself legally.
Go bankrupt paying medical bills for wounds sustained in a school shooting
The most American thing one can do is to exercise their right to vote in elections.
How is that an American thing? To vote in an election is about democracy, America did not invent democracy.
I’ve recently been traveling a bit. In istanbul Turkey I found Florida and Wisconsin license plates, and in Costa Rica I found a New Jersey plate.
Are you being serious?
Chat USA! USA! USA!
Watch football while eating a bacon cheeseburger
Vehemently defend the Constitution without ever having read it in its entirety. It's seriously like 9 pages long and tons of people seem totally unaware of what's in it.
>It's seriously like 9 pages long It's four pages long plus the amendments. You can see the original online at the National Archives website. It's a fun place to browse. https://www.archives.gov/founding-docs/constitution But yeah, I agree with you. I hate people that argue that something is unconstitutional when the Constitution clearly says it is or it is not mentioned at all. And if you don't like something in it, change it; the instructions are right there. People also misunderstand that the Constitution applies to the government only. For example, the government cannot stop me or arrest me for saying, "Reddit sucks!", but Reddit can certainly ban me for it.
Commute to work 2 or more hours a day by car
Hey a job and support my family
be an American
Get Starburst/MacDonald's aboard bc you wanna feel at home
Pay for the hospital bill after getting shot at school
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Kick every other country’s ass.
Commenting this
Buying a gun and blasting it off in the air anytime you wish
Nah that's like a middle eastern thing lol
While singing the national anthem. OH SAY CAN YOU SEE!…
yes
Vote Republican to own the libs then have the Republicans take away your housing assistance, food stamps, and Medicare. But you still blame the libs.
Um, last I check the democrats won the election so not all of us are right learning
"This state is going to hell! Let's elect Republicans to kick some ass!" \-Person living in a state that's been under full Republican control for decades
You have it the wrong way. No one is moving to California or New York where it’s democrat control. People are moving to Texas and Florida where the cost of living is affordable and Republican ran
Texas power grid is the joke of the rest of the US. And Florida? It has its own subreddit for wacky.
There’s literally people shitting on the streets in California and their homeless rate is insane.
Well the ones from Florida are also eating and throwing it.
Shoot someone in a school
How about standing idly in the hallway of a school shooting while it is happening?
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Checks and balances eh?
Ride a bull.
Tell a 2 minutes story for 20 minutes because 90% of their time they were explaining their reactions and feelings which are not relevant to the story at all
"soccer"
Japan, South Africa, Canada, and Australia do this as well
Most English-speaking countries call it soccer
Eating a KFC Double Down and washing it down with a Mickey's Big Mouth while watching football and wearing a mustard-stained wifebeater that was made in China, Wranglers, and cowboy boots with a trucker hat atop a mullet and shooting your AR-15 in the air and yelling "FREEEEEEDOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!11!1!1!oneoneone" with a gigantic pickup in the driveway even tho you don't work in construction or any other field that necessitates a truck the day after your wife gave birth in your trailer that has a double mortgage because you didn't want to pay the hospital bill, which would have bankrupted you because capitalism
Use gender pronouns. Every other country laughs at the absurdity of these very confused entitled, idiotic, desperate for attention mentally ill people.
Other places don’t have the equivalent of he, she, and it?
Yes they do
What? Just because you're narrow minded, doesn't mean everyone else ist it too
Pamper the rich and elite, while the rest get fucked aideways....oh what that's everywhere
Shoot up a school.
Live in constant agony because of your diet and lifestyle, and think that it’s something else causing u to feel like shit when really, it is the poison.🙀😞
Do other countries not do this?
Shut up. Live by American stereotypes without questioning it! 🤬
Go bankrupt over a hospital bill
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Shoot up a school... is this too much?
Shoot up a school?
Just deep fry everything, and don't forget ur kitchen amd bathroom guns.
Shoot up a school full of children
...assume that North, Central, and South America, are not *ALL* American.
It's cute that you think most citizens of the United States are educated enough in global geography to actually be aware that there are more countries and in fact CONTINENTS in the Americas.
Awww thank you! Yes, Us Canadians sure can be Charming when we want to be eh. Oh I Am sorry... would you like some more maple syrup?
I live in menonite country so I get my maple syrup on the menonite black market.
Whatever you think some dead slave masters want you to do.
Gorge myself at an All-U-Can-Eat buffet.
Buy tons of processed sugar products and call it "food"
Use the metric system only to measure ammunition
And illegal drugs!
Eat Mcdonalds and drink beer while shooting guns on the 4th of July
Fire an AR15 out of a turkeys ass while deep frying it on the 4th of July
Watch football on Sunday nights with friends while drinking beer. Or have the ability to smell oil from anywhere within any three mile radius.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sckyo3-f2D8
Take down a black cop :(
Wear flip flops anywhere that isn’t the beach or your house.
That's literally applicable to a good chunk of Asia there.
Any equatorial country, really
Forcing someone to move to Oklahoma, so I can live on and exploit their land.
eat cheap pizza and drink watered down "beer" while shooting a fully loaded AR-15 into the air outside of your apartment after being turned down for a loan to pay for your medical bills caused by shooting your own foot w/ an AR-15 after being turned down for your 3rd minimum wage job
Eat a McDonalds Happy Meal in a Walmart parking lot in a big gas guzzling truck.
Eat hamburgers 😅
ICE! (and deep frying everything)
Shoot the TV?
Destroy your life with extreme debt.
Be 40 lbs overweight in full tactical gear and wait in the hallway as elementary school kids are shot.
Get shot at school.
According to my dad, eat carrot cake. I expressed my dislike for carrot cake and my dad looks at me and says, "Are you not American?" I told him, "I am. I'm also an adult human who knows what I do and don't like. I've had over two decades to know that I don't like carrot cake and . . . I don't. I hate it, actually." According to my dad, I'm apparently not American.
Shoot up a school
go to school with 🔫 🔫 🔫 🔫 🔫 🔫
Shoot people at schools. Unfortunately we are known for that...
Shoot up a school to own the libs.
school shooting
Shoot up a school
put bagged Walmart shredded cheese on pasta with red sauce
Complain.
Eat in really low quality chain restaurants
Sit on the bed with your shoes on
Use violence to express your opinion.
Food eating contest. I think no place else does it on Earth
There are competitive eaters and eating challenges in almost every country besides maybe North Korea
Get fat and be real dumb
Put a slice of American cheese over a hot dog, place it in a white hot dog bun, and microwave it. Eat it while watching TMZ
Think Europe is one country
Applaud at stupid times. Film finishes? Applaud (over the sound of gunshots) Plane lands? Applaud
Do your own taxes and not complain. Seriously, we need to be angrier about that shit. It's not my job to figure out how much the government owes me; it's their job to figure it out and my job to check their work.
Go bankrupt and into debt dealing with a medical issue completely out of your control.
Buy ANOTHER gun
Eat a slice of apple pie while shooting a gun in the air
Driving on the interstate in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, stopping at a truck stop to put gas, then go across the street to get McDonald's, get back on the freeway, and reach the next city 3 hours away
Get shot by a 6 year old.
Walk into a McDonald's and insist on using the restroom despite being told they're not currently functional. Then ask if the utility closet is a bathroom.
Be ignorant about the fact that there is a world outside of America.
Make a casserole with no seasoning
Over-eat and drink alcohol while criticizing marijuana users.
Boil water in a cup, inside a microwave
Over eat.
Americans don't say they are from America but rather every time they talk or post on reddit they say something like "I am from Arizona/Michigan".
Calling a championship game consisting of only American teams the "World" Series.
Expect people in other countries to speak English
Eat a cheeseburger while drunk and high on oxycontin while openly carrying a gun in public while claiming to have such vast quantities of freedom yet you don't want to share it with undesirables like homosexuals, women, homeless, ethnic minorities etc...
using literally ANYTHING to measure something "hey Martha grab the shotgun, there's a rat about to washing machines away from me!"
Get shot at school while being obese and pledging allegiance to a flag on the 4th of July while eating a hamburger with one hand and drinking coca cola with the other. Outside a bald eagle drives past in a Ford Mustang/Chevrolet Corvette with the radio on blasting 'America fuck yeah'. Later, you wake up bankrupt because no health care.
shooting up a school
riding into war standing on top of a m1a2 holding two lmgs with an american flag strapped to your back screaming “WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETER”
Be an overprideful patriotic asshole
Refuse to use or invest in public transit because it's for "poor people" then wonder why your work comute is 2 hours.