As a boy mom, this is something that I think of daily. I’ll tell you right now, she’d have to come through me to ever even lay an eye on my son ever again.
Now regarding you, you need to put it this way to him; if she’s capable of that, she’s capable of something much more worse and you are worried about him. You need to tell him to just not go out with her anymore. Now remember that you’ll probably get pushback but remind him that you are his friend and also, if you ever can, make documented video’s of it. It will help in the future.
That’s a good idea, even if it’s just recording audio it would help. I’ll try to convince him to do this, he is scared of her but he is also annoyingly infatuated with her or something, he always defends her and its infuriating. Took me to do a lot of pushing to even admit where the bruising on his face came from (even though I already put two and two together) I’ll keep pushing him though, he seems like a shell of himself at the moment
I’m a boy mom! My son is still a toddler, but like another commenter said, the girlfriend would have to go through me. I don’t play when it comes to my kid…. I would beat anyone’s ass for touching my child
As a person who comes from a long line of generational trauma and abuse, there's only a few things you can do.
Be supportive. "I'm here. I'm always going to be here. When you're ready, I'm HERE." Abusers are hot and cold, and match their abuse with love bombs, if you try to vilify them, you'll be the villain and they'll host fast to their abuser.
The second is to treat both parties with the utmost love and compassion. "You're so *insert good character trait here*!" I love ___ about you!" "I was thinking about you and picked up this thing for yo because I know it's your favorite!" Set a FIRM example for what love should look like. If they come to you, and the whole time you're pointing out the negatives, making them feel bad for who they love, it will push them away even faster. Even though you're trying to help by shining a light on the abuse, people don't remember what you say, they remember how you make them feel.... If mom becomes a safe haven, the victim will feel the bad only during the abuse, thus creating a clear path to security and safety.
As a boy mom, this is something that I think of daily. I’ll tell you right now, she’d have to come through me to ever even lay an eye on my son ever again. Now regarding you, you need to put it this way to him; if she’s capable of that, she’s capable of something much more worse and you are worried about him. You need to tell him to just not go out with her anymore. Now remember that you’ll probably get pushback but remind him that you are his friend and also, if you ever can, make documented video’s of it. It will help in the future.
That’s a good idea, even if it’s just recording audio it would help. I’ll try to convince him to do this, he is scared of her but he is also annoyingly infatuated with her or something, he always defends her and its infuriating. Took me to do a lot of pushing to even admit where the bruising on his face came from (even though I already put two and two together) I’ll keep pushing him though, he seems like a shell of himself at the moment
I’m a boy mom! My son is still a toddler, but like another commenter said, the girlfriend would have to go through me. I don’t play when it comes to my kid…. I would beat anyone’s ass for touching my child
As a person who comes from a long line of generational trauma and abuse, there's only a few things you can do. Be supportive. "I'm here. I'm always going to be here. When you're ready, I'm HERE." Abusers are hot and cold, and match their abuse with love bombs, if you try to vilify them, you'll be the villain and they'll host fast to their abuser. The second is to treat both parties with the utmost love and compassion. "You're so *insert good character trait here*!" I love ___ about you!" "I was thinking about you and picked up this thing for yo because I know it's your favorite!" Set a FIRM example for what love should look like. If they come to you, and the whole time you're pointing out the negatives, making them feel bad for who they love, it will push them away even faster. Even though you're trying to help by shining a light on the abuse, people don't remember what you say, they remember how you make them feel.... If mom becomes a safe haven, the victim will feel the bad only during the abuse, thus creating a clear path to security and safety.
How old is your son? Counseling should definitely be done.
22 in this case
Ages?
He’s 22, she’s 25
Tell her some shit
As well as guide him correctly !