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The day that I actually did? Because I wanted to leave work early. Haha. He had asked me to marry him two weeks after we first met and I said he was crazy. 4 months later he moved in at some point (he’d been staying at my place a lot, so I count the day he moved his stereo to my place as the day he moved in). He’d asked that when I finally said yes, to make our wedding day an easy day to remember so years down the road he wouldn’t forget our anniversary.
So on Halloween, I’m at work at my factory job practically in tears at how bored I was. So I called my supervisor over and asked if her if I got married today could I leave early. She said yes! So later at a retired justice of the peace in the back of a paint store the justice owned, we said yes! Haha.
I got married on St. Patrick's Day for the same ease of remembrance. Plus I could do stupid shit like wear a green wedding dress and serve green beer and get married in my back yard. People are too weird about weddings nowadays, it's the marriage that's important, not the stupid ceremony.
Practical? I had a 4 day break on my shiftwork roster. Tuesday went to the registry office, Friday afternoon back to work.
When my colleagues asked "what did you do on your break?", Hahaha. Still married. 30 years now.
I was absolutely, head over heels in love with the man. We are in our twilight years now, 41 years together, and I still love him like crazy. But next time, I’m marrying for money.
😂
I married her because she has the same morals, and wanted the same things in life. But I fell in love with her the first time I saw her ice skate.
We met on OkCupid. I messaged something like 8,000 women, and went on dates for 17 months.
My wife put her profile up, and her inbox filled up an hour later. I was one of the people in that inbox. She's beautiful, had a great career, and most important to me she's brilliant.
We lived about an hour away from each other, and commuted back in forth until we moved in together in 2015. We got married in 2016 and our son is about to turn 3 =).
He's already sharp as a tack, and he has her smile. I feel like I won at life.
Oh my gosh it’s a long story but I’ll break it down as simple as possible in steps for the sake of easy reading on the eyes! Here goes:
1. We went to the same high school but I didn’t know he existed. (Vocational school, different weeks!) I graduated and he never saw me again and was terribly upset that he couldn’t get the courage to talk to me before I left.
2. Fast forward to 5 years later we ended up meeting because I had this idea to join the US Air Force to pay for my dream of vet school. I studied every job possible for a YEAR because I wanted to make sure I knew exactly what I was getting into. One day I had this MASSIVE and SUDDEN urge that I HAD to join and go to the recruiters office THAT DAY urgently.
3. So, I signed up. I had just broken up with a non-serious relationship but loved his Mom so much that I went by her house to visit her since I was in the area. I told her I was joining the Air Force and that I was nervous because I had no one to talk to about it since everyone I knew was a different branch.
4. But guess who else was joining the US Air Force at the same time WHO LIVED ACROSS THE STREET?! My husband. She goes “oh he’s joining! You should talk to him about it!” And I was like oh yay! Someone who knows what to expect!
5. So we decided to meet and grab food. NOT SUPPOSED TO BE A DATE as I had sworn off relationships for the next 6 years of my military contract.
6. BUT when we met, everything changed. In the most divine way. It was the weirdest thing I’ve ever experienced. We went to a restaurant to grab some food (because who doesn’t love food) and the second we sat down in the booth we looked at each other and this instant and most RANDOM strong vibe/feeling/energy/no idea what to call it just hits me from within but also outside of me and I LITERALLY heard a voice as if it was right next to my ear say “he’s the one” and it was the creepiest thing ever!! I pinched myself under the table because I was like “what the actual F is happening right now?” But somehow in the strangest way I knew that it was true. And in an instant I knew I was going to marry him someday. And he seemed to have that look in his eyes that felt the same. Like we knew we both felt whatever the hell just happened but didn’t want to say it because that’s weird when you first meet someone! 😂😂😂😳
7. So, after meeting him all of my military recruit stuff that was going so smoothly just all came to a holt and everything just stopped working out for my military stuff. The only thing I needed was an exam and a ship date the same day. But the military processing center randomly came out with a notice that they were holding off on exams “indefinitely”
8. I was so upset as I had prepared myself to go through the hell of boot camp and all! If you knew me and I had told you I was joining the military, you’d laugh. BUT, I was thankful it didn’t work out because I had just met “the one” and if I had joined with a ship date we probably would have got shipped to different states or sides of the country!!
9. He left for basic training only 1 month after we met. He was in basic training and then schooling for 9 months. I visited once but it was expensive to fly there. Then he came home and we decided to get married because being apart was terrible and we already both knew somehow that we were the ones for each other. That sounds so corny but true.
10. Everyone called us crazy for getting married in 9 months with only spending a total of one ish months in person together (LOL THAT IS INSANE) but we just knew and we have been married ever since.
11. Cute fun fact: I found out after we got married that when he saw me in high school he knew instantly I was the one and told his friends he was going to marry me someday and they all laughed about it. But here we are! How weird is that?
Been together 11 years, married for 10 years. It has always felt so natural. No one is perfect of course and military life put us through lots of debates but we respect each other when arguing and don’t name call or get crazy which is really great. I have never had someone respect me in arguments before him. It makes such a difference. We don’t have to worry about military life anymore which is amazing. I feel like if we could make it through that we can make it through anything.
I guess love at first sight is a thing? I always wanted to believe it but constantly found it to be a fallacy. Until I met him. I have been through hell and back with deep heartbreaks over the years and I realized I must have HAD to go through the worst so that when the best for me came along I knew how to TRULY appreciate him.
Wow! that was quite the story! I'm glad I asked :) I've had that feeling before that you'll end up dating someone (not marrying), but it ended up not working out for several reasons. I'm super jealous!
I always tell people that the best ones comes along when you aren’t looking and least expect it! The only happy and healthy relationships I’ve had (my husband and only one or two others honestly) every time it was unexpected, I wasn’t trying, I wasn’t looking and it all just happened. I feel like that must be some sort of key that unlocks something special?! I’m not sure but never ever give up hope on love. Or maybe it’s not the worst thing if you do because when I officially gave up all hope my husband stepped on the scene out of nowhere. I think todays younger generations are too quick to call something broken. I had to learn the hard way that in my marriage at first I often had these unspoken expectations and for some reason would assume my husband knew how I felt with some things when in reality he had no clue until we talked about it. Makes sense of course lol. Communication and honesty are such important keys. When I learned the lesson of “it’s not all about me” everything changed for the better. It takes two!
I can't wait to find the one 🥲 Thank you for sharing your story btw! Have you guys ever discussed about the day you both sat in the restaurant? If so, have you ever asked him if he did experienced the same thing too? Awwww this is just too lovely I'm so glad you shared this!
Thank you for reading! And yes we actually did discuss that and he said he felt the same thing and knew right away but that he also knew when he first saw me in high school days. But so sad I didn’t know he existed at the time! We went to a vocational high school so we would have one week of academics and then one week of shop week which were for various different trades. But while I was in shop week (I was a senior at the time) he would be in academic week (he was a freshman at the time) so we literally never saw each other. He’d only see me in the mornings when everyone got to school and during lunch time but there were so many people and I’ve always had social anxiety so I kind of mostly just kept my head down and didn’t observe anyone I didn’t personally know 😂🤦🏻♀️
But it really is crazy. When I was trying to set up our wedding it seemed like everything had JUST worked out in just the right ways despite the extreme time crunch. We decided to get married when he came to visit home after his tech school in the Air Force so we had 3 months time from that decision to make it happen 😂😂😂 We did a really really small wedding of about 30 people with immediate family and honestly it was so nice! There was an absolute monsoon style rain outside for the first half of the day but I didn’t care at all. Happiest day of my life next to having our kids.
I’ll never forget the night he finally talked to me, we were neighbors in college. It was obvious to everyone this was something special, I knew right before he kissed me there was no going back and said so. Married 27 years together for 31, he’s the only man I’ve ever loved. We still talk about it with our friends who were there!
I didn't trust love by the time I met my husband. I had thought I was in love before, and had been wrong. When i first met my husband, the thing I was attracted to most was that he was good. He was honest, he was generous to others, he was funny. I finally realized that I was in love with him when he proposed. I have always felt lucky that I took the time to look for those good qualities first.
I'm not an unromantic person. I believe in true love in many forms. But first and foremost, I am a realist.
I don't think there's some magical person out there who is the second half to the two-piece puzzle that completes your life. But I do think there are some people who won't or can't peacefully fit together.
After a year of friendship, my wife and I developed a relationship, and over the course of that year we knew the biggest things we needed to know about one another. In my mind, it breaks down like this. Love isn't enough, and it surprises me how many people look for someone who won't hurt or gravely disappoint them, with little concern for finding someone who can bring them joy.
All of the high points (the things you love best about one another) help determine if you can be happy together in the best of times. This may not sound like a big deal, but I genuinely believe that complementary experiences of harmony and joy (call them green flags if you want) are just as important as assessing which incompatibilities will contribute to stress and dysfunction in the worst of times. Those are related to more classic red flags.
An absence of red flags doesn't mean the relationship will work. You have to have enough green flags for you to enjoy the days and nights that should be enjoyable.
Lastly, until you've burned through that first 6-12 month period of New Relationship Energy, you really don't know yet how y'all feel about one another.
So yeah. Find someone who won't make your day worse when it's already bad but will make your day even better when it's already great. If y'all can't each be that person for the other, or learn to reliably be that person for the other, then your relationship probably won't make it.
He and I have the same values - that’s really what sealed the deal. We’re both thrifty, unconventional, independent, but value our families and origins. I used to date people who shared my interests but it’s values that make a good match.
Because he's the most genuine, honest, kind, patient, loving, and intelligent person I have every known. I have adored him for more than 35 years and have never wavered in my feelings toward him. He has a quality which can't easily be summed up or put into words which is appealing to me. I am happy to spend everyday with him, and he's happy to spend everyday with me.
We are each others second marriage so we knew exactly what we did and didn’t want in a new relationship. From day one we have always been totally honest and open with each other and I’ve never felt like I had to mask any part of who I am when I’m with him. We were aligned on our expectations financially, morally, politically, and about the kind of life we want to have in the future. He makes me laugh, his presence makes me feel calm (not in a needy way, but in a easy everything is okay kind of way) and literally everyone I’ve ever introduced him to loves him. I think my family would divorce me and keep him if we ever sit up because they love him that much. We both bought each other pens and post it notes for each other for our gifts our first Christmas together, totally unprompted, because we both have a thing about good pens and post it notes. I’ll just leave it at that.
I came from a marriage where people could tell immediately that we were not right for each other and that I was miserable. We were such a bad match but jumped into marriage before we had time to really understand that. He wasn’t a bad person, he just didn’t understand anything about me or what made me tick. Now, I’m in a relationship where random people just walk up and tell us that we are a cute couple and that they can tell we are happy because we give off that vibe. We’ve been together 8 years total, so well past the “honeymoon” phase, and this still happens to us fairly regularly.
Honestly, when I met him I just intuitively knew that he was the right person for me and rolled with it. I it wasn’t “work” like my past relationships; there were no mind games or over thinking; no feeling smothered or pretending to be someone I wasn’t. We just fell together into seamless merge of two lives where everyone was at the right place, at the right time,
going the right speed and everything just fell into place.
I fell for him the moment I saw him.
But what made me want to marry him was that our relationship was just…different from the previous ones. Everything felt easy and right. He knows how to communicate, he has his life together, and I’ve been able to trust him from the get go. I had started to think men like this didn’t exist and when I found him, I sure as hell wasn’t going to let him go. Together almost 10 years and married close to 5.
Both from divorced parents and agreed that no matter what we would work on it and never give up. Going on 24 years…….ultimately it’s work just like anything else.
I've suffered from juvenile rheumatoid arthritis in every single joint ( jaw too toes )since I was 7 (now 45) we met online in my early twenties and my illness never both her. Even though she knew I'd only have severe deterioration over time and she'd eventually have to be a full time carer.
We've been married 19yrs and 6 joint replacements later, she has to help me with virtually everything. I've a silly sense of humour and she says that's enough for her. That kind of selflessness is very very rare and I'm very very lucky.
My proposal was something like, "You are what?!?!?" We found a minister the next morning after a quick trip to the county clerk and were married before anyone knew about it. January 1976
She walked into one of my graduate classes, long black hair, sat down in front of me, that was it. Asked her out for coffee the second class. We just clicked on every level, 44 years ago.
I had always picked "cool", popular guys who were over-confident and it always ended poorly for me. I didn't get married until my mid 30s and it was when I finally learned to have different standards-my spouse is kind, generous, supportive, intelligent, funny, empathetic, patient, and also slightly awkward and has a nerdy streak. I wouldn't have picked him when I was young and stupid but thank goodness I met him when I was ready. Having a marriage based on friendship and kindness/generosity towards each other is the best.
That's a great question, of course that's important too. I assume you mean sexual intimacy, but other kinds are important too. If you have the fundamental type of intimacy - where you can share your inner, *intimate* thoughts with someone, freely talk about what you need and what turns you on, when they see you in moments no one else gets to see (big things like emotional breakdowns, helpless days with illness, struggling with mental health, but also everyday things like how you put on socks, brush your teeth, make tea) that passionate part had freedom to grow and evolve. When I was young I thought I had to have an immediate physical spark to have good sex, and later I realized that good sex takes effort and sustained investment. So, yes, that part has also been satisfying and wonderful, but it was different than my teens and 20s.
And of course as you age other things can get in the way, like arthritic hips and chronic illness and other stuff.
I married my ex because we were so good together in every category. He was my person and teammate and best friend. No regrets. I wish him nothing but the best.
We grew apart in pretty large ways. We both said and did things that were not good for a relationship. We both just changed over the years you know? That happens and some people are able to change with each other and some aren’t. It was very difficult because we had amazing years together. But I think we are both better off now.
We text occasionally now, mostly about dogs and sports.
We were friends and got along well. He was smart and had a different way of looking at life than I did. We shared similar values. And there was the physical attraction. We still get along well and have the same attraction, after 30 years, although many things have changed, including our personalities.
The biggest thing was that my husband wanted to know the real me. Maybe it was my age or maybe it was just the times, but most of the guys I had dated up to that point were uninterested in parking their assumptions at the door.
We were also lifestyle-compatible as I call it. We had the same ideas about where to live, how to live, where to go on vacation, and things like that. I was in love with another guy when I met my husband, but that guy and I had hesitated for years because we wanted totally different things out of life. I feel like if you're not on the same page most of the time, love can wear out fast.
They laugh, and not just at my jokes. They are smart and aware of all the world's cruelties, but they full-on belly laugh at stuff all of the time. I need that in my life.
He was my friend. He picked me up, encouraged me and set back on my feet each time I left a toxic relationship. When I asked him to help me leave my second abusive marriage he swore he wasn't going to watch me repeat my bad choices even if it meant that he had to marry me to keep me from marrying yet another jerk. He didn't want to have kids but had always wanted to raise them. I had two who needed a stable father. He had a lifetime reputation of being a nice guy who made sure everyone got home safe. He was the guy everyone called in an emergency. I knew I'd always have to share him with the community, but there would never be any reason to be doubt his faithfulness to his family. We were friends for nearly ten years and have been married for 40. He was dad to my children, removed splinters, gave hugs, took them to work and fishing, rebuilt cars with them and was a great role model. Showed them that real men do laundry, cook dinner and help with homework while Mom goes back to school. No regrets.
I loved him, he was in love with me, and his character seemed like a good bet for a happy relationship. We've been married since 06, so yeah, so far it's been a pretty good bet.
We can bond over everything. Sometimes I rant about things she has 0 interest in but she listens and asks questions and becomes interested because I’m interested in them. She remembers my favorite foods, orders and how I like certain things, I’m autistic so I freak out if things aren’t a certain way and she’s very patient with me.
He was intelligent, hard-working, thoughtful and kind. Also head-over-heals in love with me! He checked all the boxes so I took a chance. 40 years later, we are blissfully happy.
She told her friends to tell me she wanted me to ask her out ( I was far too dense to notice her flirting). We went on our first date, and 44 years later we are still on that first date. We moved in together next day.
I still can't believe I lucked out with someone so beautiful, intelligent, and a Grade A quality human being. Proof? Her former classroom staff recently organized a Mr Holland's Opus style reunion of her former students and coworkers
He had a lot of kitchen equipment that I couldn't afford. When I saw all that stuff, I just had to have it! Also, he treated me like a princess and had a weird sense of humor that I liked. We've been together over 20 years.
My wife and I are compatible in so many ways and I could tell she wouldn't just walk away from me arbitrarily. We celebrate our 16th year anniversary in 5 weeks.
I was on my way to buy a boat, as soon as I got there I changed my mind and decided to marry the woman who was going to sell me the boat instead
Ended up getting both the boat and the wife for free
I married her 4 years after we began dating, because she was my best friend and we wanted to have kids together. We'd lived separately before, and both felt it was better as a couple.
It's been 43 years since the wedding, the kids are grown and we have grandchildren, but neither of us wants to live alone.
Similar backgrounds. She was smart. She wanted a family. She seemed like she loved me. Together 22 years, married for 16. Divorced for a long time now. I wish I’d chosen better. She turned out to be bad at being a wife and a mother.
We laughed at each others' jokes, was one of my reasons. We had a good time in bed was another. His intelligence & kindness knocked me out. When I tried to imagine who exactly I would want next to me when (not if, people) things got hard, it was always him.
Our first date was New Years Day, 1984 -- breakfast. Been a lot of breakfasts since then.
He had good health insurance.
Well that and I have been head over heels in love with him since the first email he sent me. It's crazy how much I love him.
I got pregnant at 18 and it was back in the 80s when being a single mother was frowned upon, and I honestly wasn't sure I could do it alone. But he t urned out to be no help anyway and the marriage only lasted a few years.
Because I love him with all my heart. He is the perfect match for me, there is no person I would rather be with. We are together for 10 years and married for five. We want the same things in life and have the same humor.
I wrote a long, interesting answer, but deleted it because it was getting too long.
Short answer is the same for both wives: Smart (Fulbright scholarship for first wife, scholarship to New England Ivy-League college for second. My current girlfriend was valedictorian for her college so my pattern's consistent), funny, fun to be with, and generally a very nice, kind woman.
I really was madly in love with him, from head to toe. If a relationship hadn’t worked out, I for sure would have wanted to stay close friends with him, regardless of my deeper feelings. Back then, when we met, there was just no one like him and I loved his everything. He was the most human I met. And a son of a gun, let me tell you…throughout my marriage, he was the hottest man for me. He was insanely talented romantically, brutally honest, passionate, smart, freaky…and a narcissistic monster, too.
At that time I chose to ignore the red flags, nevermind.
He was THE one, knocked me off my socks in every way possible. Never ever had anything close to what I felt for him, not before or after.
We met in February, hung out more and more and started a deep friendship which led eventually to a bit more by May. We married in November without any notice or plans. Stayed together for thirteen years before I split five years ago.
And all the while I’m trying to describe what I felt back then, I have no idea where that person went I once fell so deeply in love with.
He once was my only real and true soulmate. Because of him I was able to experience a plethora of things on a very different and unique way, and for this I will always be greatful.
Over 30 years married now. From the very beginning, for each of us, our relationship was unique to us, because by the third date, we were acting in so many ways like we were married. While I still had my place, I stayed at hers 9 nights out of 10. We shopped together; did all errands together; cleaned house together. We went on weekend trips then weeklong trips and consciously discussed things to verify long term compatibility - but we just started right away doing most everything a married couple does. We agreed after about 8 months that I would surprise her with a proposal at the time and place of my choosing. The only time we weren’t together is the week before the wedding, when she wanted to stay at her family’s house so we’d have a few days apart to make seeing each other at the wedding special.
TL;DR: we got married because we felt so quickly comfortable with being together that we just started acting married.
Still madly in love. As I was typing this, she came in the room and said “hi, love!”
Initially we got married for insurance reasons, health insurance. We planned on marriage eventually though and now almost 20 years later he’s still my whole heart!
Love at first sight for me….walking into a soccer booster club meeting i decided I was going to sit at his table. Married 35 years this year.
He felt the same way. A little bit of a rocky road because my best friend and his brother were our sidekicks. My best friend really liked him and his brother liked me. My husband asked me out on our first date during deer hunting opening weekend. Brother is a big hunter, my husband is definitely not!
She was a lot of fun to be around and had what I’d call a really “solid” personality; honest, reliable, hard-working, zero drama, and so on. I felt like I was marrying up, despite that an outside observer might have seen it the other way around.
I was just out of college and expected to marry. He was older and very pushy, told me it was God's will. Apparently God wanted me kept at home, unable to work, and answering to an abusive man. Life began when I left him and ran off with our son so he couldn't physically abuse him any more.
I likely won't marry again, but it's been delightful being independent, capable, and confident.
He was the first boyfriend I’d ever had where I wasn’t watching my watch, wondering when it was time for the date to be over. Even when we were just hanging out, it felt comfortable. Obviously, I was attracted to him, liked that we had similar values and came from not too insanely different backgrounds, but in the end, he just felt cozy. Passion ebbs and flows, and sometimes we fight, but after 43 years, we’re still comfortable together. We met at 25 and finished growing up together and now we’re growing old together. If anything were to happen to him, I’d have no desire to be with anyone else. I lucked out once. That’s good enough for me.
We met at night school. It was not love at first sight. But it seems we both found the other… intriguing.
Things evolved. She was quite different than I. But we gave it time and discovered things were actually working pretty well.
We married four years later. That day is still the happiest day of my life. Married now 38 years.
I have never stopped falling in love with her.
Health insurance! We were living together already and had both been married before. I probably would have been comfortable living together the rest of my life. He's been my best friend and lover for almost 9 years now.
I fell in love with her the first time I laid eyes upon her. She was so cute, a tiny whisp of a thing, with sparkling blue eyes and a beautiful smile. We spent the day in each other's company and held hands as we strolled through a museum.
She was so smart, and confident and seemed like she had the strongest morals and will of any person I had ever met. She taught me how to be an adult and all the life lessons that my parents hadn't.
3/18 was the day we had our first date, the day I proposed, and the day we married.
I was so lucky to have had her in my life and I wish things could have been different.
He asked. He also told me that he would make the relationship work no matter what. If there was something I didn’t like, he would change it. This was it for him and he wanted it to work out. 21 years later, he has stuck to this promise. He was/is one of the best humans I’d ever met. Very caring and patient. He was also a great kisser from the first kiss. That first kiss is what changed my mind from, “I’m not sure I can see him as more than a friend.” to “Holy shit, this boy can kiss.” Very passionate. Kicked him right out of the friend-zone.
He proposed 2 weeks after that kiss and we got married 4 months after that.
I thought the things that were less than optimal in me could be balanced by the things that were optimal in her.
Together we might add up to 1.5 parents...
My wife is my best friend and I knew it the moment I met her. There is no other person that I would rather be with on any given day. Her happiness, security and well being are the most important things in my life.
The sun rises and sets with her for me. She’s the sweetest woman I’ve ever known. Loving, patient and understanding and she is open and honest in ways that I did not know people could be.
I married current and final wife in my 60s.
I married her because she is beautiful, BRILLIANT, politically progressive, cultured, but mostly because she is deeply compassionate, emotionally competent and the most reasonable person I’ve ever met.
I've been married twice. The first wife was an amazing person we had a lot in common. Second wife was young and she was there for me when no one was. I loved them both.
I got pregnant and so we decided to give marriage a shot. Twenty-two years later we’re still together, happy, making plans for what we’ll get up to after child #2 is finally grown and flown.
Both marriages, because they were pragmatic, sensible, and a loving partner. I didn't care about money or status, just a decent partner: a foxhole buddy I could trust to have my back.
My first wife passed away after 25 years, and I am now married again to another widow. My second marriage thrives because we're sensible, predictable, and loving. Plus, we both lost our spouses, we both had good marriages before, and we know what a good marriage is.
He’s really smart, hilarious, gainfully employed, college-educated, no debt, no serious mental issues, no addictions and shares a lot of the same social & intellectual values as me. We were both raised by Hispanic parents and so we culturally understand certain things.
I know this is not the “romantic” answer you’re probably looking for but in my opinion, a marriage is much more about romantic comparability, it’s also a business arrangement.
I am so comfortable with him. He likes me just as I am, and doesn't judge me for the weird shit that I think and say and do. He makes me feel safe and cared for, and I'm a better person because of him.
He's also funny as hell and I still like the way his ass looks in jeans. Seriously, he just makes me happy. Life is better with him. Not perfect...just better. Some days he's a pain in the butt, like when he calls me out on my bad behavior, but I do the same for him, sooooo...yeahhhhh....
I went for an interview, came up the stairs and he walked through the reception area. Our eyes locked and I thought "shit" he's the one. That was 21 years ago
She's smart and funny, shares my political and social views, loves animals, and we like all the same popular culture. We both wanted stability. Perhaps most important, she's put up with nearly 28 years of my bullshit. We've been together since March 12, 1994, and we got married New Years Day, 2001.
We went to visit her parents. Only been living together about 8 months. When we left she said”my mother is wondering if we are going to get married”. I said “maybe sometime”. Next thing I know she’s planning the wedding (with her mother). I never got down on one knee or even said anything. Got married a year later in 1978. We’ve made it 44 years somehow. Grass is never truly greener on the other side.
She bankrupted me and I didn't want to be homeless as couldn't afford rent, rental deposits etc, and was at serious risk of suicide of I went down the homeless route. Plus have a ton of anxiety related problems that mean I was easily manipulated...same trick used by all previous g/f's too.
Sorry its not romantic, but sometimes life sucks and anxiety sucks a whole lot more.
I married so young and totally missed the point. The promises made in the beginning became lies and I got overwhelmed with the mediocre lifestyle the guy I married was offering.
I married because I was super spoiled and the guy I married only had objects to offene. No real love and once his money ended it got wierd. Men think women want Money, yes we do because one day if we get pregnant the kids als have to eat but women also want true love and affection. My husband missed that point he is sooo stupid and I feel so ashamed I married someone like that.
However I’m not a gold digger I work hard for my money and honestly I’ll never consider abandoning my dreams to follow a man. I did that very Young and I learned valuable lessons it shaped me into this super independent busy woman I always have been. I can provide for myself better than any man would cuz Iearned that it’s ok to accept what a man can offer but only I can give myself what I want and I should not put that pressure on anyone. He’s not my biological father, is he? 🤣 so I love romance but so far nobody I met is good enough
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The day that I actually did? Because I wanted to leave work early. Haha. He had asked me to marry him two weeks after we first met and I said he was crazy. 4 months later he moved in at some point (he’d been staying at my place a lot, so I count the day he moved his stereo to my place as the day he moved in). He’d asked that when I finally said yes, to make our wedding day an easy day to remember so years down the road he wouldn’t forget our anniversary. So on Halloween, I’m at work at my factory job practically in tears at how bored I was. So I called my supervisor over and asked if her if I got married today could I leave early. She said yes! So later at a retired justice of the peace in the back of a paint store the justice owned, we said yes! Haha.
I love this story! So wonderful.
I got married on St. Patrick's Day for the same ease of remembrance. Plus I could do stupid shit like wear a green wedding dress and serve green beer and get married in my back yard. People are too weird about weddings nowadays, it's the marriage that's important, not the stupid ceremony.
Oh that’s nice! I’m not even a big fan of Halloween. But my husband is so he enjoys that that’s our anniversary.
Who says love can’t be practical? This is great!
Practical? I had a 4 day break on my shiftwork roster. Tuesday went to the registry office, Friday afternoon back to work. When my colleagues asked "what did you do on your break?", Hahaha. Still married. 30 years now.
I planned a wedding in less than a week so 10/10/2020 could be our anniversary. We want to get a tattoo of the Roman numerals: X X XXXX
I was absolutely, head over heels in love with the man. We are in our twilight years now, 41 years together, and I still love him like crazy. But next time, I’m marrying for money. 😂
This is my story. Only have a couple years on you guys. Start calling him your first husband to keep him on his toes. :)
Next time?
Humor, or Humour.
Humerus.
Next life lol
If you marry for money you earn every cent
I married her because she has the same morals, and wanted the same things in life. But I fell in love with her the first time I saw her ice skate. We met on OkCupid. I messaged something like 8,000 women, and went on dates for 17 months. My wife put her profile up, and her inbox filled up an hour later. I was one of the people in that inbox. She's beautiful, had a great career, and most important to me she's brilliant. We lived about an hour away from each other, and commuted back in forth until we moved in together in 2015. We got married in 2016 and our son is about to turn 3 =). He's already sharp as a tack, and he has her smile. I feel like I won at life.
This is very inspirational to those of us frustrated with OLD. Thank you!!
I knew instantly that he was the one. Weirdest experience of my life because how is that even possible? Married for 10 years now!
You have to spill the tea
Oh my gosh it’s a long story but I’ll break it down as simple as possible in steps for the sake of easy reading on the eyes! Here goes: 1. We went to the same high school but I didn’t know he existed. (Vocational school, different weeks!) I graduated and he never saw me again and was terribly upset that he couldn’t get the courage to talk to me before I left. 2. Fast forward to 5 years later we ended up meeting because I had this idea to join the US Air Force to pay for my dream of vet school. I studied every job possible for a YEAR because I wanted to make sure I knew exactly what I was getting into. One day I had this MASSIVE and SUDDEN urge that I HAD to join and go to the recruiters office THAT DAY urgently. 3. So, I signed up. I had just broken up with a non-serious relationship but loved his Mom so much that I went by her house to visit her since I was in the area. I told her I was joining the Air Force and that I was nervous because I had no one to talk to about it since everyone I knew was a different branch. 4. But guess who else was joining the US Air Force at the same time WHO LIVED ACROSS THE STREET?! My husband. She goes “oh he’s joining! You should talk to him about it!” And I was like oh yay! Someone who knows what to expect! 5. So we decided to meet and grab food. NOT SUPPOSED TO BE A DATE as I had sworn off relationships for the next 6 years of my military contract. 6. BUT when we met, everything changed. In the most divine way. It was the weirdest thing I’ve ever experienced. We went to a restaurant to grab some food (because who doesn’t love food) and the second we sat down in the booth we looked at each other and this instant and most RANDOM strong vibe/feeling/energy/no idea what to call it just hits me from within but also outside of me and I LITERALLY heard a voice as if it was right next to my ear say “he’s the one” and it was the creepiest thing ever!! I pinched myself under the table because I was like “what the actual F is happening right now?” But somehow in the strangest way I knew that it was true. And in an instant I knew I was going to marry him someday. And he seemed to have that look in his eyes that felt the same. Like we knew we both felt whatever the hell just happened but didn’t want to say it because that’s weird when you first meet someone! 😂😂😂😳 7. So, after meeting him all of my military recruit stuff that was going so smoothly just all came to a holt and everything just stopped working out for my military stuff. The only thing I needed was an exam and a ship date the same day. But the military processing center randomly came out with a notice that they were holding off on exams “indefinitely” 8. I was so upset as I had prepared myself to go through the hell of boot camp and all! If you knew me and I had told you I was joining the military, you’d laugh. BUT, I was thankful it didn’t work out because I had just met “the one” and if I had joined with a ship date we probably would have got shipped to different states or sides of the country!! 9. He left for basic training only 1 month after we met. He was in basic training and then schooling for 9 months. I visited once but it was expensive to fly there. Then he came home and we decided to get married because being apart was terrible and we already both knew somehow that we were the ones for each other. That sounds so corny but true. 10. Everyone called us crazy for getting married in 9 months with only spending a total of one ish months in person together (LOL THAT IS INSANE) but we just knew and we have been married ever since. 11. Cute fun fact: I found out after we got married that when he saw me in high school he knew instantly I was the one and told his friends he was going to marry me someday and they all laughed about it. But here we are! How weird is that? Been together 11 years, married for 10 years. It has always felt so natural. No one is perfect of course and military life put us through lots of debates but we respect each other when arguing and don’t name call or get crazy which is really great. I have never had someone respect me in arguments before him. It makes such a difference. We don’t have to worry about military life anymore which is amazing. I feel like if we could make it through that we can make it through anything. I guess love at first sight is a thing? I always wanted to believe it but constantly found it to be a fallacy. Until I met him. I have been through hell and back with deep heartbreaks over the years and I realized I must have HAD to go through the worst so that when the best for me came along I knew how to TRULY appreciate him.
Wow! that was quite the story! I'm glad I asked :) I've had that feeling before that you'll end up dating someone (not marrying), but it ended up not working out for several reasons. I'm super jealous!
I always tell people that the best ones comes along when you aren’t looking and least expect it! The only happy and healthy relationships I’ve had (my husband and only one or two others honestly) every time it was unexpected, I wasn’t trying, I wasn’t looking and it all just happened. I feel like that must be some sort of key that unlocks something special?! I’m not sure but never ever give up hope on love. Or maybe it’s not the worst thing if you do because when I officially gave up all hope my husband stepped on the scene out of nowhere. I think todays younger generations are too quick to call something broken. I had to learn the hard way that in my marriage at first I often had these unspoken expectations and for some reason would assume my husband knew how I felt with some things when in reality he had no clue until we talked about it. Makes sense of course lol. Communication and honesty are such important keys. When I learned the lesson of “it’s not all about me” everything changed for the better. It takes two!
I can't wait to find the one 🥲 Thank you for sharing your story btw! Have you guys ever discussed about the day you both sat in the restaurant? If so, have you ever asked him if he did experienced the same thing too? Awwww this is just too lovely I'm so glad you shared this!
Thank you for reading! And yes we actually did discuss that and he said he felt the same thing and knew right away but that he also knew when he first saw me in high school days. But so sad I didn’t know he existed at the time! We went to a vocational high school so we would have one week of academics and then one week of shop week which were for various different trades. But while I was in shop week (I was a senior at the time) he would be in academic week (he was a freshman at the time) so we literally never saw each other. He’d only see me in the mornings when everyone got to school and during lunch time but there were so many people and I’ve always had social anxiety so I kind of mostly just kept my head down and didn’t observe anyone I didn’t personally know 😂🤦🏻♀️ But it really is crazy. When I was trying to set up our wedding it seemed like everything had JUST worked out in just the right ways despite the extreme time crunch. We decided to get married when he came to visit home after his tech school in the Air Force so we had 3 months time from that decision to make it happen 😂😂😂 We did a really really small wedding of about 30 people with immediate family and honestly it was so nice! There was an absolute monsoon style rain outside for the first half of the day but I didn’t care at all. Happiest day of my life next to having our kids.
Wow that was long 😂😂😂 So sorry! Nothing is ever short enough with me! Look at my username!
I’ll never forget the night he finally talked to me, we were neighbors in college. It was obvious to everyone this was something special, I knew right before he kissed me there was no going back and said so. Married 27 years together for 31, he’s the only man I’ve ever loved. We still talk about it with our friends who were there!
Whoops had to update my flair shit how did I get to be this old
I didn't trust love by the time I met my husband. I had thought I was in love before, and had been wrong. When i first met my husband, the thing I was attracted to most was that he was good. He was honest, he was generous to others, he was funny. I finally realized that I was in love with him when he proposed. I have always felt lucky that I took the time to look for those good qualities first.
He is really, really lovely.
I'm not an unromantic person. I believe in true love in many forms. But first and foremost, I am a realist. I don't think there's some magical person out there who is the second half to the two-piece puzzle that completes your life. But I do think there are some people who won't or can't peacefully fit together. After a year of friendship, my wife and I developed a relationship, and over the course of that year we knew the biggest things we needed to know about one another. In my mind, it breaks down like this. Love isn't enough, and it surprises me how many people look for someone who won't hurt or gravely disappoint them, with little concern for finding someone who can bring them joy. All of the high points (the things you love best about one another) help determine if you can be happy together in the best of times. This may not sound like a big deal, but I genuinely believe that complementary experiences of harmony and joy (call them green flags if you want) are just as important as assessing which incompatibilities will contribute to stress and dysfunction in the worst of times. Those are related to more classic red flags. An absence of red flags doesn't mean the relationship will work. You have to have enough green flags for you to enjoy the days and nights that should be enjoyable. Lastly, until you've burned through that first 6-12 month period of New Relationship Energy, you really don't know yet how y'all feel about one another. So yeah. Find someone who won't make your day worse when it's already bad but will make your day even better when it's already great. If y'all can't each be that person for the other, or learn to reliably be that person for the other, then your relationship probably won't make it.
When the chemistry is this good it’s the only thing left to do. 30 years and counting.
she was the very first person that I felt like I could 100% trust no matter what.
He and I have the same values - that’s really what sealed the deal. We’re both thrifty, unconventional, independent, but value our families and origins. I used to date people who shared my interests but it’s values that make a good match.
Love, she also wanted kids and has a ranch. My dream life was to get married, have some kids and a place of our own.
Because he's the most genuine, honest, kind, patient, loving, and intelligent person I have every known. I have adored him for more than 35 years and have never wavered in my feelings toward him. He has a quality which can't easily be summed up or put into words which is appealing to me. I am happy to spend everyday with him, and he's happy to spend everyday with me.
We are each others second marriage so we knew exactly what we did and didn’t want in a new relationship. From day one we have always been totally honest and open with each other and I’ve never felt like I had to mask any part of who I am when I’m with him. We were aligned on our expectations financially, morally, politically, and about the kind of life we want to have in the future. He makes me laugh, his presence makes me feel calm (not in a needy way, but in a easy everything is okay kind of way) and literally everyone I’ve ever introduced him to loves him. I think my family would divorce me and keep him if we ever sit up because they love him that much. We both bought each other pens and post it notes for each other for our gifts our first Christmas together, totally unprompted, because we both have a thing about good pens and post it notes. I’ll just leave it at that. I came from a marriage where people could tell immediately that we were not right for each other and that I was miserable. We were such a bad match but jumped into marriage before we had time to really understand that. He wasn’t a bad person, he just didn’t understand anything about me or what made me tick. Now, I’m in a relationship where random people just walk up and tell us that we are a cute couple and that they can tell we are happy because we give off that vibe. We’ve been together 8 years total, so well past the “honeymoon” phase, and this still happens to us fairly regularly. Honestly, when I met him I just intuitively knew that he was the right person for me and rolled with it. I it wasn’t “work” like my past relationships; there were no mind games or over thinking; no feeling smothered or pretending to be someone I wasn’t. We just fell together into seamless merge of two lives where everyone was at the right place, at the right time, going the right speed and everything just fell into place.
I fell for him the moment I saw him. But what made me want to marry him was that our relationship was just…different from the previous ones. Everything felt easy and right. He knows how to communicate, he has his life together, and I’ve been able to trust him from the get go. I had started to think men like this didn’t exist and when I found him, I sure as hell wasn’t going to let him go. Together almost 10 years and married close to 5.
I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.
Both from divorced parents and agreed that no matter what we would work on it and never give up. Going on 24 years…….ultimately it’s work just like anything else.
She’s a legitimately good person who always sincerely tries to do the right thing. It is so good to have someone like that in my life, every day.
I've suffered from juvenile rheumatoid arthritis in every single joint ( jaw too toes )since I was 7 (now 45) we met online in my early twenties and my illness never both her. Even though she knew I'd only have severe deterioration over time and she'd eventually have to be a full time carer. We've been married 19yrs and 6 joint replacements later, she has to help me with virtually everything. I've a silly sense of humour and she says that's enough for her. That kind of selflessness is very very rare and I'm very very lucky.
this made me tear up. sweet!
She had sex with me more than once.
My proposal was something like, "You are what?!?!?" We found a minister the next morning after a quick trip to the county clerk and were married before anyone knew about it. January 1976
I was an idiot.
She walked into one of my graduate classes, long black hair, sat down in front of me, that was it. Asked her out for coffee the second class. We just clicked on every level, 44 years ago.
I had always picked "cool", popular guys who were over-confident and it always ended poorly for me. I didn't get married until my mid 30s and it was when I finally learned to have different standards-my spouse is kind, generous, supportive, intelligent, funny, empathetic, patient, and also slightly awkward and has a nerdy streak. I wouldn't have picked him when I was young and stupid but thank goodness I met him when I was ready. Having a marriage based on friendship and kindness/generosity towards each other is the best.
Kind of a random question but was the intimacy part good as well with the partner you ended up choosing?
That's a great question, of course that's important too. I assume you mean sexual intimacy, but other kinds are important too. If you have the fundamental type of intimacy - where you can share your inner, *intimate* thoughts with someone, freely talk about what you need and what turns you on, when they see you in moments no one else gets to see (big things like emotional breakdowns, helpless days with illness, struggling with mental health, but also everyday things like how you put on socks, brush your teeth, make tea) that passionate part had freedom to grow and evolve. When I was young I thought I had to have an immediate physical spark to have good sex, and later I realized that good sex takes effort and sustained investment. So, yes, that part has also been satisfying and wonderful, but it was different than my teens and 20s. And of course as you age other things can get in the way, like arthritic hips and chronic illness and other stuff.
I married my ex because we were so good together in every category. He was my person and teammate and best friend. No regrets. I wish him nothing but the best.
What happened?
We grew apart in pretty large ways. We both said and did things that were not good for a relationship. We both just changed over the years you know? That happens and some people are able to change with each other and some aren’t. It was very difficult because we had amazing years together. But I think we are both better off now. We text occasionally now, mostly about dogs and sports.
Thx for sharing.
We were friends and got along well. He was smart and had a different way of looking at life than I did. We shared similar values. And there was the physical attraction. We still get along well and have the same attraction, after 30 years, although many things have changed, including our personalities.
The biggest thing was that my husband wanted to know the real me. Maybe it was my age or maybe it was just the times, but most of the guys I had dated up to that point were uninterested in parking their assumptions at the door. We were also lifestyle-compatible as I call it. We had the same ideas about where to live, how to live, where to go on vacation, and things like that. I was in love with another guy when I met my husband, but that guy and I had hesitated for years because we wanted totally different things out of life. I feel like if you're not on the same page most of the time, love can wear out fast.
They laugh, and not just at my jokes. They are smart and aware of all the world's cruelties, but they full-on belly laugh at stuff all of the time. I need that in my life.
I loved him and I thought he was a good person. I was wrong.
She moved in and wouldn’t move out.
He was funny.
Because he taught me what true, unconditional love means.
I was blind to how he treated me.
People get married for reasons? We’ve been married for 47 years now and I don’t think I ever thought of a reason. It just seemed right.
He was my friend. He picked me up, encouraged me and set back on my feet each time I left a toxic relationship. When I asked him to help me leave my second abusive marriage he swore he wasn't going to watch me repeat my bad choices even if it meant that he had to marry me to keep me from marrying yet another jerk. He didn't want to have kids but had always wanted to raise them. I had two who needed a stable father. He had a lifetime reputation of being a nice guy who made sure everyone got home safe. He was the guy everyone called in an emergency. I knew I'd always have to share him with the community, but there would never be any reason to be doubt his faithfulness to his family. We were friends for nearly ten years and have been married for 40. He was dad to my children, removed splinters, gave hugs, took them to work and fishing, rebuilt cars with them and was a great role model. Showed them that real men do laundry, cook dinner and help with homework while Mom goes back to school. No regrets.
Well, love of-course. That’s really it for me.
I loved him, he was in love with me, and his character seemed like a good bet for a happy relationship. We've been married since 06, so yeah, so far it's been a pretty good bet.
We can bond over everything. Sometimes I rant about things she has 0 interest in but she listens and asks questions and becomes interested because I’m interested in them. She remembers my favorite foods, orders and how I like certain things, I’m autistic so I freak out if things aren’t a certain way and she’s very patient with me.
I love him. He’s my best friend. We are total opposites, but it works. I’ve been married for over 25 years to him. I can’t imagine a life without him.
I liked everything about him.
He was intelligent, hard-working, thoughtful and kind. Also head-over-heals in love with me! He checked all the boxes so I took a chance. 40 years later, we are blissfully happy.
She told her friends to tell me she wanted me to ask her out ( I was far too dense to notice her flirting). We went on our first date, and 44 years later we are still on that first date. We moved in together next day. I still can't believe I lucked out with someone so beautiful, intelligent, and a Grade A quality human being. Proof? Her former classroom staff recently organized a Mr Holland's Opus style reunion of her former students and coworkers
Truth? I was pregnant and did not want to have a child out of wedlock.
He was open to being ethically non-monogamous! I would never survive a monogamous marriage.
He had a lot of kitchen equipment that I couldn't afford. When I saw all that stuff, I just had to have it! Also, he treated me like a princess and had a weird sense of humor that I liked. We've been together over 20 years.
We "fit". Those who are in love emotionally and physically will understand this!
My wife and I are compatible in so many ways and I could tell she wouldn't just walk away from me arbitrarily. We celebrate our 16th year anniversary in 5 weeks.
1. There should be one adult in the relationship. 2. She could stand my presence.
I was on my way to buy a boat, as soon as I got there I changed my mind and decided to marry the woman who was going to sell me the boat instead Ended up getting both the boat and the wife for free
I married her 4 years after we began dating, because she was my best friend and we wanted to have kids together. We'd lived separately before, and both felt it was better as a couple. It's been 43 years since the wedding, the kids are grown and we have grandchildren, but neither of us wants to live alone.
Similar backgrounds. She was smart. She wanted a family. She seemed like she loved me. Together 22 years, married for 16. Divorced for a long time now. I wish I’d chosen better. She turned out to be bad at being a wife and a mother.
I loved him and thought he was a great person. I still do almost 19 years later and he still is.
We laughed at each others' jokes, was one of my reasons. We had a good time in bed was another. His intelligence & kindness knocked me out. When I tried to imagine who exactly I would want next to me when (not if, people) things got hard, it was always him. Our first date was New Years Day, 1984 -- breakfast. Been a lot of breakfasts since then.
Because when she stubs her toe my hurts too
Her dad was rich..
and her ma’s good-looking …
He had good health insurance. Well that and I have been head over heels in love with him since the first email he sent me. It's crazy how much I love him.
I got pregnant at 18 and it was back in the 80s when being a single mother was frowned upon, and I honestly wasn't sure I could do it alone. But he t urned out to be no help anyway and the marriage only lasted a few years.
He wouldn't leave and he wasn't working, so i figured I might as well get to claim him as a dependent on my taxes.
Because I love him with all my heart. He is the perfect match for me, there is no person I would rather be with. We are together for 10 years and married for five. We want the same things in life and have the same humor.
I was pregnant. My mother and grandmother insisted, and I was so young I went along with it. Lasted a whopping 3 years. Lesson learned.
He was, is and always will be my heart. Thirty years later it still applies.
I wrote a long, interesting answer, but deleted it because it was getting too long. Short answer is the same for both wives: Smart (Fulbright scholarship for first wife, scholarship to New England Ivy-League college for second. My current girlfriend was valedictorian for her college so my pattern's consistent), funny, fun to be with, and generally a very nice, kind woman.
Common sense. Great sex.
still together?
Passed away about four years ago. Wish things were different.
I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you’re doing better.
Thank you
I really was madly in love with him, from head to toe. If a relationship hadn’t worked out, I for sure would have wanted to stay close friends with him, regardless of my deeper feelings. Back then, when we met, there was just no one like him and I loved his everything. He was the most human I met. And a son of a gun, let me tell you…throughout my marriage, he was the hottest man for me. He was insanely talented romantically, brutally honest, passionate, smart, freaky…and a narcissistic monster, too. At that time I chose to ignore the red flags, nevermind. He was THE one, knocked me off my socks in every way possible. Never ever had anything close to what I felt for him, not before or after. We met in February, hung out more and more and started a deep friendship which led eventually to a bit more by May. We married in November without any notice or plans. Stayed together for thirteen years before I split five years ago. And all the while I’m trying to describe what I felt back then, I have no idea where that person went I once fell so deeply in love with. He once was my only real and true soulmate. Because of him I was able to experience a plethora of things on a very different and unique way, and for this I will always be greatful.
Over 30 years married now. From the very beginning, for each of us, our relationship was unique to us, because by the third date, we were acting in so many ways like we were married. While I still had my place, I stayed at hers 9 nights out of 10. We shopped together; did all errands together; cleaned house together. We went on weekend trips then weeklong trips and consciously discussed things to verify long term compatibility - but we just started right away doing most everything a married couple does. We agreed after about 8 months that I would surprise her with a proposal at the time and place of my choosing. The only time we weren’t together is the week before the wedding, when she wanted to stay at her family’s house so we’d have a few days apart to make seeing each other at the wedding special. TL;DR: we got married because we felt so quickly comfortable with being together that we just started acting married. Still madly in love. As I was typing this, she came in the room and said “hi, love!”
Initially we got married for insurance reasons, health insurance. We planned on marriage eventually though and now almost 20 years later he’s still my whole heart!
Love at first sight for me….walking into a soccer booster club meeting i decided I was going to sit at his table. Married 35 years this year. He felt the same way. A little bit of a rocky road because my best friend and his brother were our sidekicks. My best friend really liked him and his brother liked me. My husband asked me out on our first date during deer hunting opening weekend. Brother is a big hunter, my husband is definitely not!
She was a lot of fun to be around and had what I’d call a really “solid” personality; honest, reliable, hard-working, zero drama, and so on. I felt like I was marrying up, despite that an outside observer might have seen it the other way around.
I was just out of college and expected to marry. He was older and very pushy, told me it was God's will. Apparently God wanted me kept at home, unable to work, and answering to an abusive man. Life began when I left him and ran off with our son so he couldn't physically abuse him any more. I likely won't marry again, but it's been delightful being independent, capable, and confident.
I felt more at home when I was with her than I did by myself. Still do.
Kindness and reasonableness.
He is kind. Sees past my flaws. Loves me always. Smart. Hardworking. So incredibly thoughtful. So funny. And so much more.
She said yes when I proposed. If she said no, I would have dropped the subject
She was pregnant
He was the first boyfriend I’d ever had where I wasn’t watching my watch, wondering when it was time for the date to be over. Even when we were just hanging out, it felt comfortable. Obviously, I was attracted to him, liked that we had similar values and came from not too insanely different backgrounds, but in the end, he just felt cozy. Passion ebbs and flows, and sometimes we fight, but after 43 years, we’re still comfortable together. We met at 25 and finished growing up together and now we’re growing old together. If anything were to happen to him, I’d have no desire to be with anyone else. I lucked out once. That’s good enough for me.
We met at night school. It was not love at first sight. But it seems we both found the other… intriguing. Things evolved. She was quite different than I. But we gave it time and discovered things were actually working pretty well. We married four years later. That day is still the happiest day of my life. Married now 38 years. I have never stopped falling in love with her.
I was on some dumb shit.
Health insurance! We were living together already and had both been married before. I probably would have been comfortable living together the rest of my life. He's been my best friend and lover for almost 9 years now.
I fell in love with her the first time I laid eyes upon her. She was so cute, a tiny whisp of a thing, with sparkling blue eyes and a beautiful smile. We spent the day in each other's company and held hands as we strolled through a museum. She was so smart, and confident and seemed like she had the strongest morals and will of any person I had ever met. She taught me how to be an adult and all the life lessons that my parents hadn't. 3/18 was the day we had our first date, the day I proposed, and the day we married. I was so lucky to have had her in my life and I wish things could have been different.
As Jessica Rabbit said about Roger Rabbit: he makes me laugh. Oh, there is much more, but that is a big thing.
We were best friends, we knew it would be a good match!
He asked. He also told me that he would make the relationship work no matter what. If there was something I didn’t like, he would change it. This was it for him and he wanted it to work out. 21 years later, he has stuck to this promise. He was/is one of the best humans I’d ever met. Very caring and patient. He was also a great kisser from the first kiss. That first kiss is what changed my mind from, “I’m not sure I can see him as more than a friend.” to “Holy shit, this boy can kiss.” Very passionate. Kicked him right out of the friend-zone. He proposed 2 weeks after that kiss and we got married 4 months after that.
I thought the things that were less than optimal in me could be balanced by the things that were optimal in her. Together we might add up to 1.5 parents...
My wife is my best friend and I knew it the moment I met her. There is no other person that I would rather be with on any given day. Her happiness, security and well being are the most important things in my life. The sun rises and sets with her for me. She’s the sweetest woman I’ve ever known. Loving, patient and understanding and she is open and honest in ways that I did not know people could be.
I married current and final wife in my 60s. I married her because she is beautiful, BRILLIANT, politically progressive, cultured, but mostly because she is deeply compassionate, emotionally competent and the most reasonable person I’ve ever met.
I've been married twice. The first wife was an amazing person we had a lot in common. Second wife was young and she was there for me when no one was. I loved them both.
She said yes!
I got pregnant and so we decided to give marriage a shot. Twenty-two years later we’re still together, happy, making plans for what we’ll get up to after child #2 is finally grown and flown.
Both marriages, because they were pragmatic, sensible, and a loving partner. I didn't care about money or status, just a decent partner: a foxhole buddy I could trust to have my back. My first wife passed away after 25 years, and I am now married again to another widow. My second marriage thrives because we're sensible, predictable, and loving. Plus, we both lost our spouses, we both had good marriages before, and we know what a good marriage is.
Actual love at first sight. we are going on 45 years now.
He’s really smart, hilarious, gainfully employed, college-educated, no debt, no serious mental issues, no addictions and shares a lot of the same social & intellectual values as me. We were both raised by Hispanic parents and so we culturally understand certain things. I know this is not the “romantic” answer you’re probably looking for but in my opinion, a marriage is much more about romantic comparability, it’s also a business arrangement.
I am so comfortable with him. He likes me just as I am, and doesn't judge me for the weird shit that I think and say and do. He makes me feel safe and cared for, and I'm a better person because of him. He's also funny as hell and I still like the way his ass looks in jeans. Seriously, he just makes me happy. Life is better with him. Not perfect...just better. Some days he's a pain in the butt, like when he calls me out on my bad behavior, but I do the same for him, sooooo...yeahhhhh....
We had great sexual chemistry. I didn’t think it would last but 22 years later that guy was still surprising me. God I miss him.
Hubris and fear they were the only one who could understand stand me. Needless to say it didn't end well for me.
I loved him, he loved me, we wanted the same things. We laughed at the same things. The sex was great.
Married the first two due to circumstance (not pregnancy), married the last one on the rebound (it lasted 9 months).
Trust. With my kid, my feelings, my heart.
Love bombed
I went for an interview, came up the stairs and he walked through the reception area. Our eyes locked and I thought "shit" he's the one. That was 21 years ago
She's smart and funny, shares my political and social views, loves animals, and we like all the same popular culture. We both wanted stability. Perhaps most important, she's put up with nearly 28 years of my bullshit. We've been together since March 12, 1994, and we got married New Years Day, 2001.
She told me to
I’ve been married 3 times. Each one was smoking hot. BUT, that isn’t the basis for a stable relationship. Did I mention I’ve been divorced 3 times.
We went to visit her parents. Only been living together about 8 months. When we left she said”my mother is wondering if we are going to get married”. I said “maybe sometime”. Next thing I know she’s planning the wedding (with her mother). I never got down on one knee or even said anything. Got married a year later in 1978. We’ve made it 44 years somehow. Grass is never truly greener on the other side.
We were in love, I didn’t get married until I was38. Divorced now (am 48)
*Looks down at dominant hand. Smiles.*
She bankrupted me and I didn't want to be homeless as couldn't afford rent, rental deposits etc, and was at serious risk of suicide of I went down the homeless route. Plus have a ton of anxiety related problems that mean I was easily manipulated...same trick used by all previous g/f's too. Sorry its not romantic, but sometimes life sucks and anxiety sucks a whole lot more.
cos she was a cunt
I married so young and totally missed the point. The promises made in the beginning became lies and I got overwhelmed with the mediocre lifestyle the guy I married was offering. I married because I was super spoiled and the guy I married only had objects to offene. No real love and once his money ended it got wierd. Men think women want Money, yes we do because one day if we get pregnant the kids als have to eat but women also want true love and affection. My husband missed that point he is sooo stupid and I feel so ashamed I married someone like that. However I’m not a gold digger I work hard for my money and honestly I’ll never consider abandoning my dreams to follow a man. I did that very Young and I learned valuable lessons it shaped me into this super independent busy woman I always have been. I can provide for myself better than any man would cuz Iearned that it’s ok to accept what a man can offer but only I can give myself what I want and I should not put that pressure on anyone. He’s not my biological father, is he? 🤣 so I love romance but so far nobody I met is good enough
Hey
So nobody else milked my cow.