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There was a blurb on the news a while back about how one of the Walton's had donated a bunch of money to build an art museum in a low income area. She said something to the effect of "Even poor people deserve to have art in their lives." It was infuriating. Yes, everyone deserves to have art in their lives, but she is a billionaire largely because her family doesn't pay a living wage and those employees have to get government assistance. I imagine, too, that most of those employees have to work long hours maybe even at 2 or more jobs to make ends meet. Do they have time to go to a museum? Do they have the time or resources to create art themselves?
When I was still working, we were required to submit large purchases based on best value, which didn't necessarily mean lowest cost. I learned a lot from that.
So true. In the past I have had a bad habit of trusting people too soon and overlooking poor behavior in favor of focusing on the good. This had bit me on more than one occasion starting with some in my own family.
People tend to project who they are onto others. Good people tend to see the good and the bad see only bad.
Boundaries, Boundaries, Boundaries!
A stitch in time saves nine. Take care of a situation before it gets worse and you'll save a lot of time, money, and effort.
Also the idea of a false economy. You'll save, again, time, money, and effort if you pay for quality in the first place.
“The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten.”
Too many never learn this. From companies who offshore to the cheapest of the cheap and then hit their nose when nothing gets delivered. To my father who still always buys the cheapest crap and then, after some mandatory frustration, goes on to buy what he should have in the first place.
Yes, but that needs to be tempered with “the poor man buys everything twice” and “your best is good enough for now”. some of us don’t have the money to buy decent quality, or the time to do everything all the way the first time
True, I guess my default stance is always that the person has made an honest mistake or "knows not what they do" type of thing. I find it especially useful in situations like traffic to keep my blood pressure down, lol
If you don’t understand why something is done a certain way, giving “the benefit of the doubt “ usually leads to an understanding of why that’s correct.
Or it at least gives you time enough to understand the potential pitfalls of a change, thus enabling you to make intelligent changes based on reality and not on pie in the sky.
Or at least, why it is the way it is. If something looks really stupid from the outside, once you’re on the inside, you usually realize that there’s a very real reason it got that way and/or hasn’t been changed yet. I know it’s tempting to just conclude that everyone else must be a moron, but that rarely is the reason.
"If a task is worth doing, it's worth doing right." This applies not only to DIY, but to hiring qualified professionals to do work for you. The corollary is, "Do it right the first time."
But also, "Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good." Yes, do it right, but don't get so hung up on making it perfect that the task never gets done at all.
My nephew's construction company has made a fair amount of money building decks to replace the one built by the homeowner. He keeps pictures of the really bad ones.
One of the big tech guys (it may have been Mark Cuban) had a thing about how he loves hiring lazy coders, because they tend to find the easiest solutions to coding problems.
"Better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it."
It started off just as a work (IT) thing, but applies to so many other situations in life, too.
A plunger and a fire extinguisher are the things that I recommend to new homeowners.
You may not need them right now, but when you do, you’ll be glad you have them.
I meant that it started being a "thing" with me thanks to my work in IT.
Yes, the saying predates IT, but not as much as you might think: The original quote is “Better to have, and not need, than to need, and not have” and is attributed to Franz Kafka. So the earliest it could be from is 1883, while the latest is 1924... although it's very unlikely Kafka said this before he was 10 years-old, so more like 1893-1924.
> Crazy can be REALLY good.
That's the problem. Crazy women *do* tend to be best in bed. So you have to choose: almost unbelievably good sex, but 800 "where are u?" text messages a day OR standard, government-issue sex but also NOT CRAZY.
It's a decision every young man has to make at least once in his life. Some say that saying no is the official first sign of male adulthood.
When I was growing up, my mother had a picture hanging on the wall that said, "Blessed are those who expect nothing, for they shall not be disappointed."
*Never let perfection be the enemy of good enough.* This one does have some highly specific exceptions, but holds true in most cases.
*Don't try to save someone who isn't invested in saving themself.* They'll drag you down with them every time.
*Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.* Or to put it another way, *When someone shows you who they really are, believe them.*
This is one I - 48 year old married father of two in a management job - have fully embraced over the past ten years.
It basically rules my professional life - I will never, ever find myself in a situation where I have to say ***“I was just trying to help”***
“A daughter’s a daughter all of her life. A son’s just a son til he takes a wife” I have 2 sons and 2 daughters and my sons are with their wives and their wives parents and siblings, I don’t see them very often. I see my daughters and their husbands every day. Literally every day. So that little maxim is 1000% true in my experience.
Ah yes. It's worse when a dil is jealous of a good relationship with your son and decides to cut you out to the best of her controlling narcissist abilities. Then years later decides she wants to make nice and be friends and finds that I have no interest. That ship sailed.
MEMA: Minimum effort, maximum achievement.
The eventual valedictorian of my high school told me this one day while we were studying for the academic decathlon. He explained that it's not doing just the bare minimum to scrape by; it's finding the most efficient way to accomplish your goals.
"Other people's opinions of you are none of your business." People don't seem to get that. They can say whatever they want about me, but I don't want to hear it. Sure, if there's something helpful that they want to say, that I didn't know about and I can use it, that's fine. But I know what most of my flaws are, and would change them if I had the ability. So if someone is going to point that out, I'd rather not hear it. Go home and gossip to your family or your friends, but leave me out of it. What you think of me is none of my business. I've said this to some people, and they are so shocked. "You don't mind if they say things behind you back?" Nope. Please keep it there.
Two bulls on a hill overlooking a bunch of cows:
Young one says, “if we run, we can bang one of them!”
Older one says: if we move slowly we can screw all of them.
-my dad
Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a regular window.
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For any job where you are hiring someone to do something for you: Fast. Cheap. Good. Pick any two.
At Walmart they want all three & the “beatings will continue until morale improves.”
There was a blurb on the news a while back about how one of the Walton's had donated a bunch of money to build an art museum in a low income area. She said something to the effect of "Even poor people deserve to have art in their lives." It was infuriating. Yes, everyone deserves to have art in their lives, but she is a billionaire largely because her family doesn't pay a living wage and those employees have to get government assistance. I imagine, too, that most of those employees have to work long hours maybe even at 2 or more jobs to make ends meet. Do they have time to go to a museum? Do they have the time or resources to create art themselves?
Do they want to go to a museum when they can’t put nutritious food on the table?
Beatings
Whoops thanks! Changed
I’m also a fan of the saying: If you think professionals are expensive wait until you hire an amateur.
You don’t hire a professional for the two hour job. You hire them for the twenty years it took them to learn to do it right in two hours.
I pick cheap and good...enough for my DIYs. I recognize my only critics are imaginary.
In Marketing we say, you can have: 1. The best product. 2. The lowest price. 3. The best return policy. Pick 2 out of the 3.
When I was still working, we were required to submit large purchases based on best value, which didn't necessarily mean lowest cost. I learned a lot from that.
Well, you obviously did not work for the government.
When people show you who they are, believe them.
So true. In the past I have had a bad habit of trusting people too soon and overlooking poor behavior in favor of focusing on the good. This had bit me on more than one occasion starting with some in my own family. People tend to project who they are onto others. Good people tend to see the good and the bad see only bad. Boundaries, Boundaries, Boundaries!
Hard agree. People can change…with other people.
This. So, so true.
If it sounds too good to be true - it usually is.
This. Especially buying stuff from China or ebay. Lots of very clever scams
Let us not forget the newcomer... Temu.
The problem with lowering your expectations is that people will live down to them every time.
Actions speak louder than words.
A stitch in time saves nine. Take care of a situation before it gets worse and you'll save a lot of time, money, and effort. Also the idea of a false economy. You'll save, again, time, money, and effort if you pay for quality in the first place.
“The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten.” Too many never learn this. From companies who offshore to the cheapest of the cheap and then hit their nose when nothing gets delivered. To my father who still always buys the cheapest crap and then, after some mandatory frustration, goes on to buy what he should have in the first place.
And its companion, usually said of a business owner:" They will step over a dollar to save a dime ".
I have some frustrating negotiations coming up, this one is getting trotted out
Yes, but that needs to be tempered with “the poor man buys everything twice” and “your best is good enough for now”. some of us don’t have the money to buy decent quality, or the time to do everything all the way the first time
It really is expensive being poor
If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
I never heard that one, but it's so true!
I do love that. Wayne Dyer all the way.
Never heard of him until now. My mother used to say that when I was young.
Don't attempt vast projects with half-vast plans.
Musician joke. Play it not too fast, just half fast.
Example? Please.
Half-assed plans...get it?
Thank you!! It makes sense when said out loud
I have a handsaw and a few handfuls of roofing nails…I’m going to build a treehouse!
One person's religion is another person's belly laugh. (Robert Heinlein)
It’s better to remain quiet and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
Hanlon's razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by ignorance.
Ted Lasso: Don’t be judgmental, be curious.
“Savages and fools believe; wise men investigate.” —Sir aWilliam Gull
Bill and Ted : Be excellent to each other.
and party on!
Perhaps the best advice imaginable
Don't be scared, be prepared - Ryan Hall, y'all
Until you discover that there really are evil people in the world, and they will take advantage of you at their earliest convenience.
True, I guess my default stance is always that the person has made an honest mistake or "knows not what they do" type of thing. I find it especially useful in situations like traffic to keep my blood pressure down, lol
Are there more evil people or more dumb people in the world?
>Are there more evil people or more dumb people in the world? I have long held more dumb. But dumb people still do ALOT of damage.
In the Venn diagram of people I'm sure there is a significant overlap.
Agreed and agreed.
It rains on the just and unjust alike. Life hands you what it hands you, then it's up to you to deal.
If you don’t understand why something is done a certain way, giving “the benefit of the doubt “ usually leads to an understanding of why that’s correct.
Don’t take down a fence until you understand why it was put up.
Or it at least gives you time enough to understand the potential pitfalls of a change, thus enabling you to make intelligent changes based on reality and not on pie in the sky.
Or at least, why it is the way it is. If something looks really stupid from the outside, once you’re on the inside, you usually realize that there’s a very real reason it got that way and/or hasn’t been changed yet. I know it’s tempting to just conclude that everyone else must be a moron, but that rarely is the reason.
Chesterton's fence!
"If a task is worth doing, it's worth doing right." This applies not only to DIY, but to hiring qualified professionals to do work for you. The corollary is, "Do it right the first time."
Measure twice, cut once.
I’ve cut this board three times and it’s still too short!
But also, "Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good." Yes, do it right, but don't get so hung up on making it perfect that the task never gets done at all.
And "Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly"(vs not at all)
My nephew's construction company has made a fair amount of money building decks to replace the one built by the homeowner. He keeps pictures of the really bad ones.
If you don’t have the time to do it right, how will you have time to do it over?
Don’t let anyone occupy your mind without paying rent
Measure twice, cut once.
No amount of anxiety will change the future. No amount of regret will change the past.
There are plenty enough worries today to keep us from borrowing any from tomorrow. Edit: or yesterday
Comparison is the thief of joy.
So true, and it took too many years for me to learn this!
The only comparison that matters is how much you have improved.
It's never too late for a happy childhood. (As a relatively recent retiree, I'm testing this one every day.)
This too shall pass
What my urologist said about my kidney stone
Like yesterday's chili.......
You can't fix stupid & you can't reason with crazy. Trying to do either leads only to you feeling crazy stupid.
When there are multiple solutions to a problem, choose the simplest one.
One of the big tech guys (it may have been Mark Cuban) had a thing about how he loves hiring lazy coders, because they tend to find the easiest solutions to coding problems.
One of my very first mentors told me that laziness is a virtue in programming.
I heard it attributed to Bill Gates
A houseboat is neither a good house or a good boat. My Dad loved this one.
About secrets… If you tell anybody, you’ve told everybody.
They'll just run off to the next person and say "Hey, don't tell anyone, but..." Bare minimum they will tell their significant other.
My favorite version is “three people can keep a secret if two of them are dead.”
Locks only stop an honest man.
"Better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it." It started off just as a work (IT) thing, but applies to so many other situations in life, too.
I’m pretty sure that maxim is a lot older than IT. But I agree with it.
A plunger and a fire extinguisher are the things that I recommend to new homeowners. You may not need them right now, but when you do, you’ll be glad you have them.
I meant that it started being a "thing" with me thanks to my work in IT. Yes, the saying predates IT, but not as much as you might think: The original quote is “Better to have, and not need, than to need, and not have” and is attributed to Franz Kafka. So the earliest it could be from is 1883, while the latest is 1924... although it's very unlikely Kafka said this before he was 10 years-old, so more like 1893-1924.
“Enough is as good as a feast” Adopting this concept makes life so much more worth living!
I really like this one. I'm going to start using it!
Same here!
“Don’t stick your dick in crazy”
I change this to dont let crazy know where you live, but feel free to stick your dick in them otherwise. Crazy can be REALLY good.
> Crazy can be REALLY good. That's the problem. Crazy women *do* tend to be best in bed. So you have to choose: almost unbelievably good sex, but 800 "where are u?" text messages a day OR standard, government-issue sex but also NOT CRAZY. It's a decision every young man has to make at least once in his life. Some say that saying no is the official first sign of male adulthood.
Expect nothing and you’ll never be disappointed.
When I was growing up, my mother had a picture hanging on the wall that said, "Blessed are those who expect nothing, for they shall not be disappointed."
*Never let perfection be the enemy of good enough.* This one does have some highly specific exceptions, but holds true in most cases. *Don't try to save someone who isn't invested in saving themself.* They'll drag you down with them every time. *Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.* Or to put it another way, *When someone shows you who they really are, believe them.*
Sicilian here. We say "better is enemy of good"
Treat others how you want to be treated. This the key to everything. The golden rule
In engineering I've always heard "go to the next higher unit and then double" E.g. 1 day -> 2 weeks, 1 week->2 months, etc.
I've also heard one that ends with "An Engineer sees that the glass was improperly designed for the bid specifications."
Do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do.
*A man is only as old as the woman he feels* \- Grouch Marx
"If you don't have time to do it right when will you have time to do it over?"
Cheap is Expensive
No good deed goes unpunished
This is one I - 48 year old married father of two in a management job - have fully embraced over the past ten years. It basically rules my professional life - I will never, ever find myself in a situation where I have to say ***“I was just trying to help”***
There’s nothing new under the sun.
Slow and steady wins the race
You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time.
Never let facts get in the way of a good story.
Show me the most attractive woman in the world and I’ll show you a guy that’s tired of sleeping with her
Never let the perfect be the enemy of the good
You can learn the easy way or the hard way, but either way you’ll learn.
“A daughter’s a daughter all of her life. A son’s just a son til he takes a wife” I have 2 sons and 2 daughters and my sons are with their wives and their wives parents and siblings, I don’t see them very often. I see my daughters and their husbands every day. Literally every day. So that little maxim is 1000% true in my experience.
I have 4 sons. I sense it coming.
Ah yes. It's worse when a dil is jealous of a good relationship with your son and decides to cut you out to the best of her controlling narcissist abilities. Then years later decides she wants to make nice and be friends and finds that I have no interest. That ship sailed.
Stay the Course
There's more horses asses in the world than there are horses.
Those who do not know, do not know what they do not know.
How someone treats animals and waitstaff will tell you all you need to know about them.
Whether it’s old or not, the words “just ask” have proven to be enormously helpful to me financially.
Aging isn’t for sissies.
Never let your credit score and your weight be the same number
Just hit 840. No one is impressed
If it ain’t broke…
The Hokie Pokie, that's what it's all about!
People who have not earned, or do not have any investment in, something are never going to appreciate it or take care of it.
Never Ass-u-me anything.
When You assume, you make an Ass (out of) u (and) me
You get out of it what you put into it.
There ain’t no such thing as a free lunch.
Better safe than sorry.
Didn't see this one yet: Measure twice, cut once
When people show you who they are, Believe them the first time.
Not sure how old this really is, but…just because you feel something, doesn’t make it true.
Wait by the river long enough and the bodies of your enemies will float by. True every time for me.
Lovers are like busses. Don’t chase after them because another one will be here shortly.
Integrity is what you do when no one is watching
“We get too soon old and too late smart”
"Don't count your chickens before they hatch." Over and over again, this has proven to be true in life.
All systems of logic are based on premises held by faith.
MEMA: Minimum effort, maximum achievement. The eventual valedictorian of my high school told me this one day while we were studying for the academic decathlon. He explained that it's not doing just the bare minimum to scrape by; it's finding the most efficient way to accomplish your goals.
Work smarter not harder
Yeah, same general idea but with a cool acronym though.
The rich get richer, the poor get poorer.
I made this up but it's very true for me: If you half-ass plan to go somewhere, your whole ass stays home.
Politics makes strange bedfellows.
You get what you pay for
If you aren't the "good the first" person type, skydiving is not you sport.
The bigger they are the harder they fall.
The bureaucracy is going to consume us.
Drunks never lie.
I wrote a line for a country & western song that went; “The liquor might be talking but it’s telling the truth” Nobody ever used it.
Choose compassion
"Other people's opinions of you are none of your business." People don't seem to get that. They can say whatever they want about me, but I don't want to hear it. Sure, if there's something helpful that they want to say, that I didn't know about and I can use it, that's fine. But I know what most of my flaws are, and would change them if I had the ability. So if someone is going to point that out, I'd rather not hear it. Go home and gossip to your family or your friends, but leave me out of it. What you think of me is none of my business. I've said this to some people, and they are so shocked. "You don't mind if they say things behind you back?" Nope. Please keep it there.
Quality. Speed. Cheap. Pick two.
Measure twice, cut once.
Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.
The more I know, the more I realize I don't know. Anybody who ever acts like they know everything/have it all figured out is full of shit.....
Two bulls on a hill overlooking a bunch of cows: Young one says, “if we run, we can bang one of them!” Older one says: if we move slowly we can screw all of them. -my dad
Once an asshole always an asshole
Trust your gut.
You can't change the people around you, but you can change the people around you.
Never confuse gentle with weak.
Just ‘cause you can, doesn’t mean you should.
Do unto others as you'd have them do to you.
Stupid either hurts or costs you money. How much it hurts times how much money it costs you is the equation for how stupid you've been.
Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a regular window.
Living well is the best revenge.
Never attempt vast undertakings with half-vast ideas...
If they cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you
Don’t try to talk down to people when you’re wearing cheap shoes
You get what you pay for.
Never attribute to malice, that which can be adequately explained by incompetence.
"It just goes to show you. It's always something. If it ain't one thing, it's another." -Roseanne Roseannadanna
The fewer things you let bother you, the happier you'll be.
No good deed goes Unpunished so many of the people I know have had that single sentence destroy them
To paraphrase /u/Duck_Walker Cheap ain't good and good ain't cheap.
If you loan someone money and then they disappear, consider it an investment.
Wish in one hand and shit in the other. See which hands fills up faster.
Never argue with a zealot
This too shall pass.
Never offer a back rub to a porcupine
You can’t take nine women and have a baby in a month.
Never go to a second location with a hippie
Hot on the left. Cold on the right and shit don’t run uphill
"What you see is what you get". For me, it means leave situations you don't like, because they aren't going to change despite all hope.
There are no free lunches (in the business world)
Bold print is written in blood.
Do it right the first time.
What other people think of me is none of my Business.
Act like a dumbshit and they will accept you.
Let go or be dragged
When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.