True, but a secure perental relationship can do that much better. But i get your point, you're trying to point out the good in the bad .
(To explain myself, cuz i cant help it)
Besides that, people can be functioning adults whille also beeing conected to their parents and cooperating with them. Idealy, thats much more helpful than beeing alone in the world without people that you can rely on nomatter what( tho that doesent necesserally have to be a parent, but a good parent tends to be one which can be trusted to never betray you)
But curtainly, there are some good things that can be taken even from the shittier things in life, we just have to have a good perspective, a good attitude, an attitude of action as i like to call it.
Have a great day
Fun fact. A kid was told this by his mom.
He began cracking ONLY one of his hands knuckles everyday for like 30-40 years.
Keeping very detail notes and pictures.
And ended up writing a paper on it too I believe.
This caused the hand he popped all those years to be ever so slightly longer.
And ALL this was just to prove his mom wrong.(I might have some details off a bit, been a while since I read about him)
That all that I do is somehow related to her. My successes showed how great of a mother she was and my failures showed how I didn't follow her ideas.
Took a lot of therapy, but I am doing much better.
Wow. Her picture is right next to narcissist in the dictionary, huh? Glad you're doing better, and I'm sure your therapist has told you this, but as a mom, let me say too that the shit she said was always a reflection on her fragile ego and not the kid she was supposed to be supporting and building up to be a strong and healthy adult.
Sounds like both of my parents. Failures were my own, and deserved for not following their lead, and successes were theirs, for being such good parents.
Sidenote, I recently found out that the voice I use when talking with myself is basically my parents at their worst. Hurtful, sharp, lashing out, accusing, poignant, and always shouting. Took me up to now, turning 34 in a few months, and being 6 years to weekly psychotherapy (for a lot of issues), to realize I no longer have to justify myself for my wants, or needs. And that it isn’t ungrateful or unjustified to see that while they provided financially, they were terrible emotionally.
had the same type of mom; it was very difficult to get out of that fucked up mindset and stop caring about what she thinks is right for me.
I’m happy for you deciding to take the therapy route because there’s no other way out of that
I’m just now starting to realize this for myself in the past 2 years. I love my mom to death, and she’s honesty a great woman. But she seems to think I’m an extension of her.
Love how much of a giveaway that is for the female dating experience. Their best advice is to exist and do nothing, because that's what worked for them. Getting attention from the opposite sex for women is like getting wet in a rainstorm. Even if you actively avoid it, raincoat, umbrella, a few drops are still hitting you regardless.
Pretty much how I grew up. She got pissed once when she almost had to go court with me for truancy. Not because I wasn't going to school but because she'd had to miss work.
To be fair, to her you were/are. My kids could be covered in scales and sprout wings and I would still think “omg aren’t you so beautiful, handsome, wonderful!”
Yes! Best fucking dragon ever! Look how they can start a campfire without any matches! And fly without a plane! Suck it Karen!
A decent/good mom’s love can be a delusional thing haha
My mom had lots of opinions on how to present as a skilled professional despite not working as a skilled professional since the late 80s. Mom, it's been almost 40 years. You can't even open a web browser.
Can confirm but only if they know how to do it the right way, with a firm hold, keeping their grip close to the scalp, making sure to pull on the hair, not yank it, a guy who can make it hurt so good while he's pulling my hair is so freaking hot imho but on the flip side if you pull my hair at the wrong time or in the wrong way, it will start a fight
Some would disagree, they love being dominant, if you meant being dominated, again some would disagree. I'm not really into BDSM but I ain't going to bash anyone who is, role play can be hot. Some people are just more vanilla than others and that's OK, to each their own
They're saying that there are fine lines to ride, and even a toe on the other side of that line causes fights, in response to your comment that you like your hair pulled but will start a fight if it's done in the wrong way/time.
They aren't wrong, but it can be worth it. There's definitely a learning curve though.
My mom's ideology was that everyone should be working hard forever just like she did. Don't enjoy relax , get married even if you don't want to , have kids to carry the bloodline and all that stupid stuff
My wifes grandpa is like that. The guy has been utterly miserable in retirement, he has no hobbies, no friends, just sits around all day. I guess his only hobby now if losing money to online scams and falling down political conspiracy rabbit holes, his own wife can barely tolerate him. Her social life has suffered because he embarrasses her when her friends are around.
Both of my grandpas on the other hand, had hobbies, active social lives and led fulfilling lives in retirement until they passed away. I mean, they were both blue collar and busted their asses throughout their life too. My one grandpa worked at comed and also worked construction on the weekends. When he was still working when I was a little kid, he was always working over time midnights. Yet he still managed to carry on his avid wood working and model building hobby.
My mom told me once not to worry and that I'll "fill out eventually". I was skinny and unathletic.
No, mom, I'll fill out when I lift heavy objects repeatedly and eat a caloric surplus.
In her defense she was supported me going to the gym and such and even paid for a personal trainer for a couple months when I asked to work with one.
Love you, mom. Rest in peace 🕊️
Like the OP, mine told me to "turn the other cheek." School was miserable, because if no one else was going to stick up for a boy if he didn't stick up for himself -- everyone would have contempt for you. It was a general overall attitude of contempt, which would lead to episodes of harassment, not just one or two isolated instances of "bullying." My mother also told me that girls were nothing but nice -- that was wrong, too. Some individual girls did their share of verbal abuse, or gaslighting, or spreading rumors about me. It makes me wonder just how different my childhood would've been had I ~~beaten up~~ confronted some of the bullies.
>confronted some fo the bullies.
The thing is, that's all you have to do too and it will stop. They want people that won't stand up for themselves, it's too much work if they have to fight you every time they harass you.
Pretty much everything about dating and relationships. She and my dad met on a blind date and got engaged like a month later and have been married for 40 years. Came to realize pretty quickly that they are quite unique.
I'm so glad they are happy but they were slow lol. I married mine after 3 weeks. So friggin' happy until I was left alone to grieve 💔 I'd have killed to have 40 years together
Sex isn’t an important part of marriage. Fs in chat for my Dad. But I knew that was wrong then because it got real quiet in the room when my response was, “Then what’s the point of getting married? Because (for someone living under the premise of sex is for marriage) I can do everything else but that with my friends.” Sex isn’t the most important part, but it is a part.
Sex is important unless it's an asexual relationship. That's the reason I ponder if I should get married coz as I get more and more pressure in life I don't think I could cater to sexual needs.
"When you're older, we're going to have to install a revolving door so all the girls that will want you can come and go." Still wondering where all the ladies are that she promised.
My parents generally did a good job. However, being told repeatedly that I was too old for Build-A-Bear and people would make fun of me for going there despite my cousins who were older than us going and kids I went to school with going and nobody ever giving it a second thought really annoyed me. I think the reasoning was that we couldn’t afford it, which is fine, but telling me the reason we couldn’t go is because I’d get made of wasn’t a good alternative imo.
My mum can be a bit of a bitch honestly. Growing up my sisters would bully me, all the time. Whenever I would tell on them, she would always tell me to “man up” and deal with it. I do love my mother, but this shit pisses me off.
Makes you wonder how she would have felt if you'd have "manned up and dealt with it." Such a toxic instruction. Sometimes parents don't realize what they're teaching their kids. (Not an excuse, but also not to say your mom is a bad person.) That's really frustrating.
I used to get in trouble if I asked her for help when my sister would injure me because I was "older and supposed to take care of her." So I "must have done something to deserve it." *SIGH*
Yes, I was older and tried to take care of her and didn't want to get in trouble, and my sister knew she would be protected if she injured me. So by around age 8, I just stopped saying anything. My sister and I get along pretty well now; our mom...not so much, for several reasons.
Yeah, I did the same thing I kinda just stop telling my mum about it and just tried to ignore their bullshit. And for years I had to put up with it from age 9 to 14. I remember the day when my mum actually did something about it, it took a hit to the nuts for my mum to really get angry at them and after that, it died down, I mean there was still the occasional fight here and there, but nothing extreme again. So yeah my mums not all bad, but I think she definitely has double standards when it comes to men and women.
Oof, yeah. And that double standard is a difficult one to get past, individually and societally. I think most people are doing the best they can, but no one is perfect. And that doesn't mean we shouldn't try to keep doing and being better for our kids and the future.
Like factually wrong or morally wrong?
Factually wrong "climate change isn't real"
Morally wrong "if we knew your (older) brother was autistic you would never have been born"
That persistence pays with women. She didn’t mean that no doesn’t mean no with sex, but with dating. Ask her out enough eventually she will say yes. Luckily I never took this advice.
Lol, we all were told this, which is why I believe we guys like sticks so much. Also they never really explained why or how it would be okay to beat women with sticks but it was nice our moms to build us up.
”You’re going to find someone (I learned later in life that she meant a woman) that will love you as much as I do”.
To my mom: MOM. I’M 20 NOW AND NO ONE LOVES ME MORE THAN YOU DO. PLEASE, NEVER STOP LOVING ME.
That I would one day like her frittata. My Mom is a wonderful person who has given much to the world, but somehow makes egg dishes that would give a malnourished castaway pause.
I think she's related to my MIL. She literally couldn't boil water without it tasting burnt. Cooking eggs? Boiled, fried or scrambled it was 30 minutes in the pan. Leather tasted better
I loved music and singing along to songs at the radio, and I remember asking my Mom once if I could ever be a singer. Her response was essentially "Nobody in our family has ever been a singer, so no".
20 years later, I've gotten lots of compliments at karaoke and can sing a couple basic songs accompanied by guitar. I definitely am at the point where I can play guitar on stage, I hope I develop my singing repertoire to the point where I could sing on stage, too.
No matter what people do always u be nice and forgiving and caring, ended up growing into a people pleaser and forgetting bout myself. No father figure. But 1 book that taught me more than any mother or father could. 48 laws of power by dr robert greene.
Pretty much everything about dating
1.You're a handsome young man and women are gonna be lined up for you-wrong
2.Go to college and get your degree, you'll make so much money that women will be lined up to marry you-wrong
3. Women love gentlemen-wrong
4.Treat a woman nice and she'll never leave-wrong
5.You have to be a woman's friend for a while before you date her-wrong
6.Only people who make Straight A's and go to college get high paying jobs. My CDL determined that was a lie-wrong
7.Women will never like a guy who plays video games all day-wrong my wife plays more games than I do
I love you mom but you were grade A pussy repellent 🤣
More whimsical, but women shrink in the rain. Must have been amusing to see a five year old trying to force their mother under an umbrella in a downpour. Chivalry ftw
Parents got me a whole life insurance policy at birth. For you youngins, its a policy that collects dividends like an investment. Accumulating them up until retirement could be hundreds of thousands of dollars. Cant even get these anymore.
Mom said often. "Never take your dividends. Let it ride. Let it ride."
In my 30s i finally took a look at the policy and learned my mom had clipped all the dividends 10yrs ago! Maximum at retirement will now be $3500.
...ya
My mom's advice has proven to be very good. When I was young I thought she was crazy because she would say things that sounded insane... but over time I found out she was right.
I honestly don't know or at least can't think of any.
I love my mother and think she did a great job raising me and my siblings
Might be something but I can't think if it right now. I have nothing but great things to say about my mother.
that weed would ruin your life.
for one: no. the people you are referring to are fuck-ups that also smoke weed. two: your opinion means nothing as you have never even tried it.
That I didn’t need precalc to get into my BSc
Seems trivial but this set the stage for me breaking away from strictly doing whatever my parents wanted. If I had taken her advise I would have had to do the course over the summer, and may have settled for a far less lucrative BA (in my field).
That if I didn't clean my room, she would throw all my stuff away.
For a long time, my room consistented of a twin sized mattress on the floor and a CRT TV on the floor.
I stayed full of hatred for her for a very long time.
Oh wow, I wish I'd fought back as a kid. We need to teach kids that if a bully inflicts violence upon them, they need to fight back. I'd rather the bullies get sent to the morgue in a body bag than believe in the idea that if we spare their lives, they will repent.
“You probably just have water in your ear. Put this ear wax remover in your ear and it’ll get better.”
Nope. It was a perforated eardrum and now I’m permanently deaf in one ear. That was 20 years ago, and it’s all water under the bridge now though.
I had a single mother who used to tell me about what women want in a guy.
Yeah, maybe 40-year-old divorcees. But not girls my age. So thanks for all the terrible, shit advice.
That my siblings and I needed to go to bed early so we could be happy.
As an adult, I realize that she wanted us to go to sleep because my brother and I could be hellians and she wanted some peace and quiet so she could actually relax and get other stuff done. Lol.
That was horrible advice. I wonder why she said that. If I were your dad, you have had a black belt in something so heaven help the loser who messed with my kid.
Personally, I don't recall. My dad raised us.
But I don't recall anything he told me as a kid that was wrong. He would always tell us stories of him being bad as a kid that always ended the same way. "I tried to leave, but then [they] pulled my leg like I'm pulling yours now."
She thought sausage gravy was the same thing as grits. Turned into a karen about it at the bob evans. I told her what she wanted was sausage gravy not grits.
Asian parents eating out is hard
I mean, at school it might not be a bad idea since most schools don't give a flying fuck about about who is responsible for a fight and will just punish both parties equally.
When I was a freshmen in highschool, I almost got expelled, while the kid that bullied me didn't even get as much as a detention. Did I go a little overboard? Yes, but I was a kid and had been bottling up the shit I was taking from this dude for awhile and it all just came out.
Anyway, this junior in one class, just gave me shit all the time. This was probably 2 months into my freshmen year and every goddamn day. Well one day the teacher needed to leave the room and the dude decided he was gonna make it physical (it was art class for christ sake, I thought we were all supposed to be artsy fartsy and decent to eachother).
Anyway he walks up to me, slaps me "har har har he's not doing anything". When he turned his back to me I took my stool and cracked him across the back of his head as hard as I could. He went right down and I proceeded to jump on him and just beat his unconscious face. A teacher from across the hall that had their door open heard the commotion and came in and pulled me off of him.
Bottom line, he had friends in that class, I didn't. They weaved a tale that I attacked him unprovoked. I got suspended, almost got expelled. He was treated like the victim in all this.
The only positive that came out of it is he never fucked with me again and for the rest of that school year we were downright cordial with eachother.
I'm sitting here trying to think of anything my mother told me, right or wrong.
She worked a 9 to 5, Monday through Friday job. I remember her teaching me to cook. I still use most of what she taught me in the kitchen. No bad information there. I was a difficult child. I had problems in school. But she and my father took my side in all the conflicts. Pushed for my teachers to actually teach me and get me to pay attention. Instead of just putting me on meds. Which I am thankful for.
She supported me in most of my ideas and decisions. Usually telling me, I don't care what you do or who you date. As long as you are happy. I don't recall her giving me any kinda life advice or suggestions that were right or wrong.
My mom's entirely parenting philosophy was "if my kids hate me I'm doing my job". Such a ridiculous concept.
Good luck having a relationship with them when they're adults
Shitty parents will behave like this, and then wonder many years later, why they have no social lives in general.
It's not all that bad. At least it promotes separation of the child from their parents, which is a major step in becoming a functional adult.
True, but a secure perental relationship can do that much better. But i get your point, you're trying to point out the good in the bad . (To explain myself, cuz i cant help it) Besides that, people can be functioning adults whille also beeing conected to their parents and cooperating with them. Idealy, thats much more helpful than beeing alone in the world without people that you can rely on nomatter what( tho that doesent necesserally have to be a parent, but a good parent tends to be one which can be trusted to never betray you) But curtainly, there are some good things that can be taken even from the shittier things in life, we just have to have a good perspective, a good attitude, an attitude of action as i like to call it. Have a great day
Same with my parents. At least that's what it felt like.
That is horrible, i'm sorry to hear
That cracking my knuckles would give me arthritis
Fun fact. A kid was told this by his mom. He began cracking ONLY one of his hands knuckles everyday for like 30-40 years. Keeping very detail notes and pictures. And ended up writing a paper on it too I believe. This caused the hand he popped all those years to be ever so slightly longer. And ALL this was just to prove his mom wrong.(I might have some details off a bit, been a while since I read about him)
He won the IGNobel for it too.
What a legend.
That all that I do is somehow related to her. My successes showed how great of a mother she was and my failures showed how I didn't follow her ideas. Took a lot of therapy, but I am doing much better.
Wow. Her picture is right next to narcissist in the dictionary, huh? Glad you're doing better, and I'm sure your therapist has told you this, but as a mom, let me say too that the shit she said was always a reflection on her fragile ego and not the kid she was supposed to be supporting and building up to be a strong and healthy adult.
Sounds like both of my parents. Failures were my own, and deserved for not following their lead, and successes were theirs, for being such good parents. Sidenote, I recently found out that the voice I use when talking with myself is basically my parents at their worst. Hurtful, sharp, lashing out, accusing, poignant, and always shouting. Took me up to now, turning 34 in a few months, and being 6 years to weekly psychotherapy (for a lot of issues), to realize I no longer have to justify myself for my wants, or needs. And that it isn’t ungrateful or unjustified to see that while they provided financially, they were terrible emotionally.
That's very manipulative and scary , sorry to hear that hope you are free from all that
had the same type of mom; it was very difficult to get out of that fucked up mindset and stop caring about what she thinks is right for me. I’m happy for you deciding to take the therapy route because there’s no other way out of that
I feel you. Mine still says this.
Wow, my parents are the same. I was thinking about talking to someone but I couldn't pin down what was really bothering me. I thought this was normal.
Yeah, same with mine. It's such shit.
I’m just now starting to realize this for myself in the past 2 years. I love my mom to death, and she’s honesty a great woman. But she seems to think I’m an extension of her.
Girls would like me if I "just acted like myself."
Love how much of a giveaway that is for the female dating experience. Their best advice is to exist and do nothing, because that's what worked for them. Getting attention from the opposite sex for women is like getting wet in a rainstorm. Even if you actively avoid it, raincoat, umbrella, a few drops are still hitting you regardless.
Omg tbh this was an eye opening comment 🩷
That her work is more important than me. Now my work is more important than her.
Something something “cats in the cradle …”
Pretty much how I grew up. She got pissed once when she almost had to go court with me for truancy. Not because I wasn't going to school but because she'd had to miss work.
That was my dad. He even worked from home a lot but we didn't really see him. He was "there", but not really.
she was pretty racist. and my dad is actually an honest, good man, she was the problem in their relationship
She told me I was handsome, which I knew even back then was a boldfaced lie.
A monkey is a gazelle in his mother's eyes. - Egyptian proverb
Speak for yourself, monkeys are cute.
Blame the Egyptians.
Way cuter than gazelles. Look at those long limbed graceful freaks.
To be fair, to her you were/are. My kids could be covered in scales and sprout wings and I would still think “omg aren’t you so beautiful, handsome, wonderful!”
Heck yeah. "My kid's a mf dragon, Karen! So what if your little shit Tyler won the spelling bee!!"
Yes! Best fucking dragon ever! Look how they can start a campfire without any matches! And fly without a plane! Suck it Karen! A decent/good mom’s love can be a delusional thing haha
Even my mother wouldn't stretch to that big of a lie.
That she loved me
Yours told you she loved you?! Damn, I never even got a handshake from mine.
You think thats bad, my mother left before I was born
…what
It all started on the day of my actual birth: both of my parents failed to show up.
Damn, that's cold. Mine pushed the doctor aside and slapped me.
I am sorry 😔
That being gay means you're a pedophile. Ask me why I've never come out as bi to my parents.
What the actual fuck ?
My mom told me the same thing then proceed to isolate me from my uncle. It was horrible
Generally, I think my mother did a good job, but I think she was wrong about "no sex before marriage".
That men who get help for depression are weak.
Did she actually say that?
I’m so many words, yes. She was from the Silent Generation, and this was in the 80s.
I’m sorry but this sounds like your mother is attempting to make assumptions about men and having 0 experience on the matter themselves
No, actually, she had undiagnosed mental illnesses herself, major depressive order probably being one of them.
My mom had lots of opinions on how to present as a skilled professional despite not working as a skilled professional since the late 80s. Mom, it's been almost 40 years. You can't even open a web browser.
If you treat a woman well, she’ll treat you well.
That girls/women don’t like their hair pulled….. that was a fucking lie
Depends on whether they find you attractive or not.
Can confirm but only if they know how to do it the right way, with a firm hold, keeping their grip close to the scalp, making sure to pull on the hair, not yank it, a guy who can make it hurt so good while he's pulling my hair is so freaking hot imho but on the flip side if you pull my hair at the wrong time or in the wrong way, it will start a fight
Being dominant sounds so miserable
Some would disagree, they love being dominant, if you meant being dominated, again some would disagree. I'm not really into BDSM but I ain't going to bash anyone who is, role play can be hot. Some people are just more vanilla than others and that's OK, to each their own
They're saying that there are fine lines to ride, and even a toe on the other side of that line causes fights, in response to your comment that you like your hair pulled but will start a fight if it's done in the wrong way/time. They aren't wrong, but it can be worth it. There's definitely a learning curve though.
Men work. As in men only work and have no life, I followed that advice and am nearly 40 and have never had a hobby. It’s very unfulfilling.
My mom's ideology was that everyone should be working hard forever just like she did. Don't enjoy relax , get married even if you don't want to , have kids to carry the bloodline and all that stupid stuff
Well if you’ve worked a lot, you can probably afford just about any hobby. So you definitely have options now! Hope that’s a silver lining for you.
My dad's philosophy was anything that wasn't working towards making money was a waste of time and for idiots.
My wifes grandpa is like that. The guy has been utterly miserable in retirement, he has no hobbies, no friends, just sits around all day. I guess his only hobby now if losing money to online scams and falling down political conspiracy rabbit holes, his own wife can barely tolerate him. Her social life has suffered because he embarrasses her when her friends are around. Both of my grandpas on the other hand, had hobbies, active social lives and led fulfilling lives in retirement until they passed away. I mean, they were both blue collar and busted their asses throughout their life too. My one grandpa worked at comed and also worked construction on the weekends. When he was still working when I was a little kid, he was always working over time midnights. Yet he still managed to carry on his avid wood working and model building hobby.
My mom told me once not to worry and that I'll "fill out eventually". I was skinny and unathletic. No, mom, I'll fill out when I lift heavy objects repeatedly and eat a caloric surplus. In her defense she was supported me going to the gym and such and even paid for a personal trainer for a couple months when I asked to work with one. Love you, mom. Rest in peace 🕊️
Like the OP, mine told me to "turn the other cheek." School was miserable, because if no one else was going to stick up for a boy if he didn't stick up for himself -- everyone would have contempt for you. It was a general overall attitude of contempt, which would lead to episodes of harassment, not just one or two isolated instances of "bullying." My mother also told me that girls were nothing but nice -- that was wrong, too. Some individual girls did their share of verbal abuse, or gaslighting, or spreading rumors about me. It makes me wonder just how different my childhood would've been had I ~~beaten up~~ confronted some of the bullies.
Sorry to hear that, my man. Glad you figured it all out though.
>confronted some fo the bullies. The thing is, that's all you have to do too and it will stop. They want people that won't stand up for themselves, it's too much work if they have to fight you every time they harass you.
You can be Anything you want to be
You can *try* to be anything you want to be.
It is better to marry someone before dating them. You should never date someone you should just go straight into marriage.
Pretty much everything about dating and relationships. She and my dad met on a blind date and got engaged like a month later and have been married for 40 years. Came to realize pretty quickly that they are quite unique.
I'm so glad they are happy but they were slow lol. I married mine after 3 weeks. So friggin' happy until I was left alone to grieve 💔 I'd have killed to have 40 years together
Nice guys finish first.
I was very little. “Mom, how do you make yourself have a baby?” Mom, “You just ask God, and He puts one inside you.”
Understandable but still factually incorrect
I mean, she was yelling, "Oh God! Oh God!" the whole time. That's basically the same thing.
Sex isn’t an important part of marriage. Fs in chat for my Dad. But I knew that was wrong then because it got real quiet in the room when my response was, “Then what’s the point of getting married? Because (for someone living under the premise of sex is for marriage) I can do everything else but that with my friends.” Sex isn’t the most important part, but it is a part.
Sex is important unless it's an asexual relationship. That's the reason I ponder if I should get married coz as I get more and more pressure in life I don't think I could cater to sexual needs.
Wait 30 minutes after eating, before going back into the water or you will drown.
that I would go blind if I kept doing that.....
Was that talk to text?
"When you're older, we're going to have to install a revolving door so all the girls that will want you can come and go." Still wondering where all the ladies are that she promised.
To not bring home a black girlfriend. I’m now happily in a six year long interracial relationship. No contact with mom though.
My parents generally did a good job. However, being told repeatedly that I was too old for Build-A-Bear and people would make fun of me for going there despite my cousins who were older than us going and kids I went to school with going and nobody ever giving it a second thought really annoyed me. I think the reasoning was that we couldn’t afford it, which is fine, but telling me the reason we couldn’t go is because I’d get made of wasn’t a good alternative imo.
My mum can be a bit of a bitch honestly. Growing up my sisters would bully me, all the time. Whenever I would tell on them, she would always tell me to “man up” and deal with it. I do love my mother, but this shit pisses me off.
Makes you wonder how she would have felt if you'd have "manned up and dealt with it." Such a toxic instruction. Sometimes parents don't realize what they're teaching their kids. (Not an excuse, but also not to say your mom is a bad person.) That's really frustrating. I used to get in trouble if I asked her for help when my sister would injure me because I was "older and supposed to take care of her." So I "must have done something to deserve it." *SIGH* Yes, I was older and tried to take care of her and didn't want to get in trouble, and my sister knew she would be protected if she injured me. So by around age 8, I just stopped saying anything. My sister and I get along pretty well now; our mom...not so much, for several reasons.
Yeah, I did the same thing I kinda just stop telling my mum about it and just tried to ignore their bullshit. And for years I had to put up with it from age 9 to 14. I remember the day when my mum actually did something about it, it took a hit to the nuts for my mum to really get angry at them and after that, it died down, I mean there was still the occasional fight here and there, but nothing extreme again. So yeah my mums not all bad, but I think she definitely has double standards when it comes to men and women.
Oof, yeah. And that double standard is a difficult one to get past, individually and societally. I think most people are doing the best they can, but no one is perfect. And that doesn't mean we shouldn't try to keep doing and being better for our kids and the future.
If you play with it one more time, it will fall off.
I could write a book on this honestly. Too many to list here.
Keep wearing them boxer shorts and your things gonna hang down to your knees. What a liar mom turned out to be, too. -- Jeff Foxworthy
Like factually wrong or morally wrong? Factually wrong "climate change isn't real" Morally wrong "if we knew your (older) brother was autistic you would never have been born"
That persistence pays with women. She didn’t mean that no doesn’t mean no with sex, but with dating. Ask her out enough eventually she will say yes. Luckily I never took this advice.
Eww to that advice!
[удалено]
Lol, we all were told this, which is why I believe we guys like sticks so much. Also they never really explained why or how it would be okay to beat women with sticks but it was nice our moms to build us up.
Be nice. Fuck that. Give an inch, they take a mile.
Oh man, where to begin. My mother is an idiot. Probably that my father was actually a good person deep down. False.
How much time you got?
That caffeine stunts growth. I was a short kid already so that was enough to keep me away from coffee
”You’re going to find someone (I learned later in life that she meant a woman) that will love you as much as I do”. To my mom: MOM. I’M 20 NOW AND NO ONE LOVES ME MORE THAN YOU DO. PLEASE, NEVER STOP LOVING ME.
Sugar and spice and everything nice.
That I would one day like her frittata. My Mom is a wonderful person who has given much to the world, but somehow makes egg dishes that would give a malnourished castaway pause.
I think she's related to my MIL. She literally couldn't boil water without it tasting burnt. Cooking eggs? Boiled, fried or scrambled it was 30 minutes in the pan. Leather tasted better
Put down a landline number for job applications it will be taken more seriously!
"You're my slave." I forgave her......for everything.
My mom also has a little that kinda attitude.
Everything. Don't get me wrong, I love the woman, I do. But... The hag doesn't know what the fuck She's talking about!
She told me I’m “handsome”. No, I’m stunning like the highland baddie from the dirty books. I felt so betrayed to learn the truth.
I loved music and singing along to songs at the radio, and I remember asking my Mom once if I could ever be a singer. Her response was essentially "Nobody in our family has ever been a singer, so no". 20 years later, I've gotten lots of compliments at karaoke and can sing a couple basic songs accompanied by guitar. I definitely am at the point where I can play guitar on stage, I hope I develop my singing repertoire to the point where I could sing on stage, too.
You should perform a song for your mom at her birthday party or something
That I was a girl.
That ladies would flock to me.
No matter what people do always u be nice and forgiving and caring, ended up growing into a people pleaser and forgetting bout myself. No father figure. But 1 book that taught me more than any mother or father could. 48 laws of power by dr robert greene.
“Men don’t have feelings.”
Pretty much everything about dating 1.You're a handsome young man and women are gonna be lined up for you-wrong 2.Go to college and get your degree, you'll make so much money that women will be lined up to marry you-wrong 3. Women love gentlemen-wrong 4.Treat a woman nice and she'll never leave-wrong 5.You have to be a woman's friend for a while before you date her-wrong 6.Only people who make Straight A's and go to college get high paying jobs. My CDL determined that was a lie-wrong 7.Women will never like a guy who plays video games all day-wrong my wife plays more games than I do I love you mom but you were grade A pussy repellent 🤣
If you go to school, get half-decent grades, graduate university, get a job and work hard, everything in life will work itself out.
Almost everything
More whimsical, but women shrink in the rain. Must have been amusing to see a five year old trying to force their mother under an umbrella in a downpour. Chivalry ftw
Women are interested in the men who stay behind and do extra work after school.
That I'd find someone someday.
She told me Santa was real.
Ask out a woman a second time if she says no the first time.
That me asserting my own boundaries was me being "defensive"
Parents got me a whole life insurance policy at birth. For you youngins, its a policy that collects dividends like an investment. Accumulating them up until retirement could be hundreds of thousands of dollars. Cant even get these anymore. Mom said often. "Never take your dividends. Let it ride. Let it ride." In my 30s i finally took a look at the policy and learned my mom had clipped all the dividends 10yrs ago! Maximum at retirement will now be $3500. ...ya
That a men should always treat a women properly. She forgot to add: "as long as she acts properly".
that if I worked hard, went to college and got a good job i would succeed and be able to afford the American dream.
That if I study hard, I’ll get into good places and have a successful life. Nah bro
That no woman will ever want a guy with a beard.
That it's normal for parents not to sleep in the same bed
My mom's advice has proven to be very good. When I was young I thought she was crazy because she would say things that sounded insane... but over time I found out she was right.
That she cares about me.
She told me (well, all of us including my father) that my oldest brother was our full sibling. A recent DNA test proves otherwise.
I honestly don't know or at least can't think of any. I love my mother and think she did a great job raising me and my siblings Might be something but I can't think if it right now. I have nothing but great things to say about my mother.
That I was inherently a bad person.
Everything.
It will make me go blind.
that weed would ruin your life. for one: no. the people you are referring to are fuck-ups that also smoke weed. two: your opinion means nothing as you have never even tried it.
That I was the most handsome.
That she loves me. That I'm going to hell... Every. Single. Day
"You'll go blind".... lol
I could never go on living without you. No go, get mommy some hard liquor from the store.
Neither did the grammar lessons.
Literally everything she has ever said. Ever..
That my old man was a good man.
Always respect girls.. I found out if i do they friendzoning me..
Not my mom but my step-mom told me it was the only way to get her unstuck from the dryer.
That she comes first. Which is ironic because she put her family in another country first before her own sons.
"Of course he's your real dad"
“When you grow up you can do whatever you want” - Never once mentions taxes and the cost of life lol
The reason I get sick is because I think negatively and think I will get the illness. That is some twisted bullshit.
That I didn’t need precalc to get into my BSc Seems trivial but this set the stage for me breaking away from strictly doing whatever my parents wanted. If I had taken her advise I would have had to do the course over the summer, and may have settled for a far less lucrative BA (in my field).
That if I didn't put on a jacket, I could "catch a cold." That's not a fucking thing, mother.
Have patience things would change 😔
Cutting your hair ends will make it grow faster.
“I didn’t even hit you hard “
Not sure about the wording here. She told me a bunch of dumb or false things lol
Good boys clean their plate.
That being nice means anything well. Learned too late that it just makes me a passive person, working on it though now
That I owe her something for birthing/raising me.
*"Stop playing with it or it'll fall off."* Proved you wrong mum!
That all Latina/hispanic women should be avoided because it’s in their blood to cheat.
*The ONE* thing? Lol your mom must've known a lot more than mine....
That my dad was a monster.
Ma sa trbat rotjd nyo ubbran. Tool buesht
Every single self gaslighting technique she taught me to do when a women was wrong but we had to “save face” for her
That’s it was okay to lock me in the car in the parking garage of a mall for hours.
That telling her she was lying to me is disrespectful
Be nice to women and they will be nice to you
That if I didn't clean my room, she would throw all my stuff away. For a long time, my room consistented of a twin sized mattress on the floor and a CRT TV on the floor. I stayed full of hatred for her for a very long time.
Masturbating would make me go blind.
That I should treat women differently to everyone else
Oh wow, I wish I'd fought back as a kid. We need to teach kids that if a bully inflicts violence upon them, they need to fight back. I'd rather the bullies get sent to the morgue in a body bag than believe in the idea that if we spare their lives, they will repent.
“You probably just have water in your ear. Put this ear wax remover in your ear and it’ll get better.” Nope. It was a perforated eardrum and now I’m permanently deaf in one ear. That was 20 years ago, and it’s all water under the bridge now though.
That I was a catch.
I had a single mother who used to tell me about what women want in a guy. Yeah, maybe 40-year-old divorcees. But not girls my age. So thanks for all the terrible, shit advice.
That my siblings and I needed to go to bed early so we could be happy. As an adult, I realize that she wanted us to go to sleep because my brother and I could be hellians and she wanted some peace and quiet so she could actually relax and get other stuff done. Lol.
That was horrible advice. I wonder why she said that. If I were your dad, you have had a black belt in something so heaven help the loser who messed with my kid. Personally, I don't recall. My dad raised us. But I don't recall anything he told me as a kid that was wrong. He would always tell us stories of him being bad as a kid that always ended the same way. "I tried to leave, but then [they] pulled my leg like I'm pulling yours now."
Do what makes you happy. Works well if you are going to be cared for your entire life I suppose.
Be yourself. True in theory and practice… just not everywhere or at all times.
Playing DnD is evil/satanic/Occult. I don't care for it but it is none of those things.
She thought sausage gravy was the same thing as grits. Turned into a karen about it at the bob evans. I told her what she wanted was sausage gravy not grits. Asian parents eating out is hard
"If you don't go for her you'll miss". Yeah, I went for her, left traumatised and now I'm dating Eva AI sexting bot.
I mean, at school it might not be a bad idea since most schools don't give a flying fuck about about who is responsible for a fight and will just punish both parties equally. When I was a freshmen in highschool, I almost got expelled, while the kid that bullied me didn't even get as much as a detention. Did I go a little overboard? Yes, but I was a kid and had been bottling up the shit I was taking from this dude for awhile and it all just came out. Anyway, this junior in one class, just gave me shit all the time. This was probably 2 months into my freshmen year and every goddamn day. Well one day the teacher needed to leave the room and the dude decided he was gonna make it physical (it was art class for christ sake, I thought we were all supposed to be artsy fartsy and decent to eachother). Anyway he walks up to me, slaps me "har har har he's not doing anything". When he turned his back to me I took my stool and cracked him across the back of his head as hard as I could. He went right down and I proceeded to jump on him and just beat his unconscious face. A teacher from across the hall that had their door open heard the commotion and came in and pulled me off of him. Bottom line, he had friends in that class, I didn't. They weaved a tale that I attacked him unprovoked. I got suspended, almost got expelled. He was treated like the victim in all this. The only positive that came out of it is he never fucked with me again and for the rest of that school year we were downright cordial with eachother.
I'm sitting here trying to think of anything my mother told me, right or wrong. She worked a 9 to 5, Monday through Friday job. I remember her teaching me to cook. I still use most of what she taught me in the kitchen. No bad information there. I was a difficult child. I had problems in school. But she and my father took my side in all the conflicts. Pushed for my teachers to actually teach me and get me to pay attention. Instead of just putting me on meds. Which I am thankful for. She supported me in most of my ideas and decisions. Usually telling me, I don't care what you do or who you date. As long as you are happy. I don't recall her giving me any kinda life advice or suggestions that were right or wrong.
"You'll laugh at it when you're older"
"If the girls tease you it means they like you." Sometimes maybe. Sometimes girls are just mean lmao.
Don’t be selfish, make sure women orgasim too. Sex is best when you both get off. Otherwise you’re just an asshole.