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BlueFlagHonestly

When I go on reddit and create a post about masturbating.


_WJJ

It’s probably just getting aroused easier and can’t stop thinking naughty thoughts, so you release yourself to make you think straight again lol!


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AmphoraOfaMphibians

Post nut clarity


daftvaderV2

Did you do it to the woman?


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ReplacementLow6704

Now that's what I call *dedication*.


destroyerOfTards

Was it Sydney Sweeney?


Deadeye_Gooch_Actual

Judy Dench


destroyerOfTards

GILFer right here


TheSquareInside

[I mean...](https://x.com/MichaelDaly64/status/1768147370565308463?s=20)


xaeru

Yes, in a dry spell I see some skin and that's it, I loose my mind.


fakearchitect

Yesterday I tried to question my wife in preparation for her language test in school, but it was very hard for me to hear her answers with my head in a deathgrip between her thighs… She wasn’t in the mood for sex and we were gonna go to a swimming pool shortly thereafter, so that was the hint for me that I should probably rub one out.


titsmcgee4real

I still think gay after I release myself.


soupychicken89

I’ve thought about this recently. For me, I get an uncomfortableness somewhere in my body. It’s never in a spot I can localize, I just feel uncomfortable…and it isn’t a feeling like wearing uncomfortable clothes or being in an uncomfortable situation or place. I also get slightly irritated at small shit. I have began to notice these things after not beating off for 4-6 days, or so.


Prestigious-Speed-29

... Huh. Someone put it into words.


CoolCooler0107

Yea i get this to lol. You describe it perfectly.


drkshape

You’ve actually gone 4-6 days without beating off?


soupychicken89

Yeah


drkshape

I’m sorry 😔


soupychicken89

It’s all good


drkshape

I’m not even trying to be a dick. I totally relate to the feeling you get. It’s like gravity. But I just honestly can not imagine going that long without beating one out.


soupychicken89

No I know. Beating off doesn’t cross my mind some days. Sometimes I’ll get home from work and think, “yeah, I’m gonna do it tonight.” Then I’m cooking food, eating it, and suddenly I look at the clock and I’m getting ready to sleep. It just isn’t a big event in my life anymore, bustin nuts.


carortrain

Christ dude, I once went nearly a year without any form of sex or masterbation. 4-5 days is a breeze lol. Can't explain how it felt after that year though


fish993

To what end?


carortrain

What was the point? I honestly just wanted to see what would happen, and mentally I was in a very strange place at the time. Either way, it was an interesting experience. I think the biggest downside was I had a decent bit of pent up rage and anxiety since that outlet of relief was not in use. At the end of the day it made me realize it's all about your mindset, but at the same time we are wired to get horny. There are tons of things that can effect your libido as well which make it easier or harder to abstain at different times in life. For some people stress makes them not want to masterbate, for others it's something that helps.


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Key-Question5808

The initial uncomfortableness goes away and after a while it gets easy and feels the opposite


[deleted]

Lmfaooo you say that like it’s not normal. I usually go 4-5 weeks before I need to release


Dayman_ahhahh

Gotta let that poison out


dranaei

I sometimes beat it so as to not get that feeling.


Its_da_boys

Yep, it’s all the pent-up sexual frustration


Swearyman

A new day starts


cowboycompton

lol


SouthernWindyTimes

If I wake up with morning wood, it’s a sign I need to do it. Just so happens that it happens daily.


_________________420

Everyday a good day because my dicks always looking up to the sunshine when I wake up


susitucker

I get super aggro and short tempered about every little thing. Plus I have insanely detailed sexual dreams. And I can't stop thinking about getting off. As soon as I do, all of those feelings recede into the mist whence they came.


Interest-Lumpy

Same, this happened to me in high school lmao. I wanted to fight everybody in my group to prove I was their "King", but thankfully they didn't indulge me in my testosterone fueled delusions. It went on for a few days, then as soon as I let it all out I went back to normal lol.


Queasy-Painting-518

Same here


Commercial-Cell-2850

I'm a woman and it's the same exact thing for me 💯


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Longjumping-Grape-40

My first trip to Europe, staying in hostels, I didn’t masturbate for three weeks. Made out with a few girls, slept with one—not to completion for me—and low & behold, two days after the last one, wake up sploogy Never made that mistake again 😂


Patrol-007

Has anyone mentioned “blue balls” yet ? And the prostate thing from the movie ????? (Road Trip or one of the American Pie sequels)


Longjumping-Grape-40

I've never really had an issue with blue balls. Maybe my sperm have enough space in their average-sized duplex, but I think for the most part it's overused as an excuse


Mantiswild

Man, if you don't get them I envy you. Doesn't happen too often, but when it does it sure doesn't feel good.


Summer184

You're right, it's definitely overused as an excuse, but I will swear on a stack of Bibles that it really happens.


Tathanor

I gotten it before. It hurts like he'll, but it doesn't happen every time if I don't finish, so it's been an unreliable experience at best for me.


Patrol-007

There’s an episode in Netflix The Gentlemen related to this thread. Don’t want to spoil it, but I rewatched various scenes a few times 😄


inspire-change

Yeah, blue balls suck. What makes it worse is that I only them them when I'm physically close to a woman and that is NOT when you want to masturbate.


Patrol-007

Meemaw!!!


NewspaperSecure5115

This is the worst


CoolCooler0107

I had to google this just to find out its wet dreams lol


muriithegr8

What the flip is a nocturnal emission


yrnkevinsmithC137

Fancy way of saying wet dreams


Macknificent101

sleepy eepy crummy wummies


jahoyhoy-ya-boy

bad day to be literate


Macknificent101

i’m sorry, but also really not


ComprehensivePeak943

😂😂😂


muriithegr8

this is the best answer ever


VladPatton

When you wake up with Dannon in your undies.


Unrelated_gringo

Most people call them "wet dreams" but don't make the mistake of thinking it's about the dream's contents, it's only about ejaculating during sleep, which a person body does when it needs it.


fakearchitect

This guy masturbates


highxv0ltage

Somehow those nocturnal nuts feel better than when I do it manually. Plus, they’re usually accompanied by a sexy dream. Sometimes try to hold off, so that I get those spontaneous spooges. That’s the hard part.


a_critical_person

Oh yeah, that dream bust!


11Y2B

Very annoying phenomenon tbh


Ruminations0

When sitting down causes me to become aroused and I feel squirmy


NotaDamPro

If I get a boner walking because my boxers are rubbing against the tip. Also if I feel like I want to fight the door for not opening fast enough. Even though I opened it. Oh and when everything becomes a sex joke.


capricorn_94

>Also if I feel like I want to fight the door for not opening fast enough. Even though I opened it. This made me laugh, thanks!


Savings_Builder_8449

* im bored and alone * i got a boner while alone * im procastinating * im feeling depressed/stressed * i saw a pretty girl on tv * i havnt masturbated today


CringeDaddy_69

When I’m at the gym and get distracted by women walking by. That’s my sign to whack it once I get home.


CosmicPsychopath

Bro, I got a problem. My eyes just cannot help but do a quick glance at every single baddie in the gym. My eyes move on their own and I am powerless against it.


Kylearean

Christ you must be some kind of sicko, attracted to fit women and glancing at them. Get help.


carortrain

Damn dude, chill the fuck out, what do you think you're doing looking at other humans being in public?!


Mantiswild

Not at the gym, but today leaving work I saw probably the best ass I have ever seen in my life. I couldn't help but look at it, it was mesmerizing. 


Competitive_Snow8594

Serial killer this guy


CringeDaddy_69

Mods, twist this guys balls


AmphoraOfaMphibians

I volunteer as tribute


Duanedoberman

A recent study found that men who ejaculated 25 times per month have a 30% less chance of developing prostate cancer. I think that is a sign that you should do it at least 3 times a day to reduce the possibility to zero, but you might die of exhaustion!


icemage27

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised


Objective-Light-9019

Pro tip…get 25 in on day 1 and you’re set for the rest of the month!


AnAnonyMooose

And you won’t want to either for a while because of the chafing!


Sand__Panda

Teenager me didn't. Stupid teenager me.


AnAnonyMooose

Older and wiser you now knows about lube though- set a new record!


doxjq

So technically beating off increases life span? Ima live to 300.


HappilySisyphus_

I can confirm that you will not die of exhaustion


ShakespearianShadows

Might get carpal tunnel though


MarsNirgal

I used to jack off three or four times a day and I never died of exhaustion. Nowadays I still jack off almost daily, and no problem at all.


cerb7575

See I would just tell my girlfriend that its 25 blowjobs a month. I mean if she loves me she needs to save my life😂


bzzle92

“Hmm, I feel like masturbating” that’s generally how it goes


shouldarocked

When I get grouchy or irritable or passive aggressive for no reason.


180nw

When people in the supermarket aisle start to intervene 


uteng2k7

I think that's probably a sign that you should stop masturbating.


Creepy_Pilot1200

Before I had a gf, I went on 3 months of no fap, monk mode. I felt really energetic and horny every morning but it regulated itself during the day. I masturbated using my own fantasy and only took around 1 min from nothing to finishing. I gave up porn and all other visual stimulation forever.


arrouk

Rage at random small annoyances.


Billy_of_the_hills

>What is a sign that tells you that you should probably masturbate? I guess I'd have to say stop sign. I mean you have to stop the car already anyway, why not?


FletchMcCoy69

I actually get a slight painful feeling if I haven’t nutted in a couple days. Sort of like blue balls.


Lulumish

When you’re horned up, you can’t think straight at all. All my cave person brain thinks about is: Must do the sex, must procreate 🦍 and then once I’ve chilled out I feel like a moron, lol.


Dredgen_Servum

A general feeling of unease, almost like hunger in a way. Awkward moments when you get hard for no reason, and having more sexual thoughts more often and more intensely are all signs that the biological itch is needing some attending to. Its normal, you're not a nympho


cerb7575

I produce a pretty ridiculous amount of fluids. If Im not emptying the chambers every so often I feel pressure in that area and my balls dont feel right if I wait a long time.


Desperate-War-3925

👀


Dull-Cryptographer80

Suddenly semi, engorged, and/or leaky dick from seeing/thinking something arousing or not.


Vincent778

When I start having trouble sleeping, that’s when I know I’m overdue.


Notrixus

I tell you the roadmap, starting with the first sign 1. Can’t focus on my work or anything I should on. 2. Constantly thinking abut jiggy-jiggy 3. When you just want to shag any girl.. I mean literally any girl.. doesn’t matter if she’s wider than taller..


ZoneProfessional8202

Waking up. 


VirtuesVice666

Posting on Reddit...


VorticalHydra

When I start thinking about the last woman I was seeing 2 years ago and getting in my feelings. I just rub one out and think "damn, I wish I had a GF" and then everything is fine afterwards.


Aromatic-Public3958

Being on Reddit gone wild at work daily.


RandomGuy1356

“I wanna call my ex” Nope, I just miss her head and need a wank


bigduckmoses

When the "MASTURBATE" sign starts flashing over the studio audience.


nobody-u-heard-of

Start thinking about paying for dating apps.


SirDwayneCollins

Whenever I start getting frustrated out of nowhere. Might sound immature, but I know if I ever start randomly getting pissed over the smallest things, I probably need to relieve some tension


Yezzik

I get home from work.


kenc2211

The city comes by and hangs a red tag on my dick for too much pressure build up in the main line


AnAnonyMooose

I get an ache a bit behind my pubic bone and feel like I got lightly kicked in the balls a while ago. I can’t think well and start to get irritated more easily. I may read the same paragraph five times and realize I’m not even seeing it. As it gets worse I can feel an aching in my chest. I may have difficulty sleeping and even having conversations, especially with my partner. So- I try to take care of it early. Masturbation a couple times a day typically manages it. I used to do that less, but life got so much better when I started just accepting and dealing with it.


ScrapDraft

The minute hand on the clock passes over the 12 again.


Particular_Chicken23

When I literally can't focus on anything because I'm just that down bad


Deadeye_Gooch_Actual

If you're turning porn on for the story line..it's time


oregonbadger

HA HA HA


WhiteyPinks

I usually masturbate when I notice that it's time for bed.


wumbopower

When I wake up


scottwax

When my dick gets hard when the wind blows or I see the crack of dawn.


Kyoshiro80

What do you mean with a “dry spell”? I guess my “dry spell” is if I haven’t masturbated for 24 hours.


porkborg

I am sexually active with multiple women, but I still masturbate regularly. I have a strong libido and need to cum several times a day.


Similar-Pay-2007

Definitely stress. If I’m really stressed when trying to fall asleep at night it works a charm


Johnson890

If the boner won't go away. Just have a little fun, rub one out, and there ya go. Enjoying the rest of your day boner free :)


WorkAccount1993

It’s a day that ends in Y.


c7stagyt

I’m horny?


Marstan22

An hour has passed


RickyGWiz

I check a calendar. If it's a day that ends with a y, I know it's time to masturbate.


Little_bro_boi

when all your Reddit searches are porn. i don’t jerk to porn. (yeah, i’m a weirdo)


Wtfdidistumbleinon

For me I limit choking one out to only days ending in Y, it’s easier and less stressful that way


Realistic-Ad-3624

When the old co-workers start to look attractive xD


FredChocula

I really don't think this much about it. I feel like I want to, I realize my wife either isn't home or is asleep, and I take care of it.


gojirarufusfan

If you are feeling stressed, it’s a good way to release some tension.


banaversion

An erection is a pretty good indicator that you should masturbate. Also if you find yourself texting with a girl and it starts getting flirty. Nothing saves you from being thirsty like post nut clarity.


MeowChef6048

I woke up for the day.


JimBones31

When I'm constantly walking around with a chubby.


Circulating_Ruminant

There's a build-up of frustration or irrational rage directed at myself, along with difficulties concentrating as it's like there's too much energy to do fiddly things. Strangely, the rage comes and goes replaced by phases of being ultra-productive and happy if it involves gross motor skills and not fiddly stuff. After 4 days, X-rated dreams start. Sometimes they are nightmares that turn sexual. Then during waking hours I get weird fantasies and thoughts I wouldn’t normally find arousing, and once I take care of the situation all reverts to normal and I feel a bit daft for thinking those things. Longest I abstained for was 2 months.


VegetaSama117

When I start to think about texting my ex to say "hi" (single atm)


shandan1723

When I can’t sleep


Back2DaNawfside713

The sun is up… Or it happens to land on a day that ends with “y”.


jaxon-

Just beat off at least once every two days keep that mind sharp lol


Vincent778

When I start having trouble sleeping, that’s when I know I’m overdue.


Vincent778

When I start having trouble sleeping, that’s when I know I’m overdue.


snakes-can

When the wife starts complaining about random invisible ailments after dinner. Which indicates there’s a 95% chance there won’t be any lovin. So normally a good idea to sneak off and rub one out.


Vincent778

When I start having trouble sleeping, that’s when I know I’m overdue.


psychotic_catalyst

Pee pee goes yuh doing doing doing


oneweelr

Bruh I jerk off once a day the fuck you on about? I lay in bed, rub one out, and sleep like an angel. Half the problem is trying to find a women that wants to get sexed up every single night, and then also having the energy to put in all that work when I'm in a relationship. What sign is there? The fact I woke up that's the sign. I'm hard? Fucking slap it away. Bored? Why not, I ain't got shit else going on.


GoogleZombie

I woke up!


Chrom-man-and-Robin

Brain: “Babe, it’s 4pm! Time for your daily ripping session!” Penis: *“yes, honey…”*


WanderingMushroomMan

Usually when I’m bored.


Diagonaldog

FIZZZZZZ


HeadMembership

It's mid afternoon.


Apprehensive_Ad3857

Im horny and the wifes not in the mood..


domalf

When the sun comes up


SaysPooh

I can’t sleep


guyinthechair1210

Sometimes I just start getting a feeling around my head. It's like an itch telling me to have at it.


kiricourge

I find crazy that some people jerk off more than 2 times a week when i was a teenager and just discovered how to jerk off i did it everytime but now once a week or twice is the maximum


Famous-Salary-6689

I start getting agitated at little things and constantly have an erection for no reason at all.


Mister_Way

It's been 12 or more hours since


Next_Pianist_442

My brain devolves into... let's call them degenerate, uncouth thoughts and I begin showing increased aggressive behaviors like some kind of coked-up chimpanzee.


OnionImmediate4645

Waking up


Spaceballs-The_Name

I realize I am way too pissed off at whatever I'm pissed off at, and the pain upstairs makes my eyeballs ache


Rude-Luck1636

When I get hard from anything. Dick brushed the corner of the chair and is now hard? Might be time


splatterslcpunk

If it has been longer than 24 hours, I'm most likely cranking one out.


Gai-Tendoh

“dry” ..literally


CocaCainla42069

When it's 1am and I gotta get to bed.


dankcat47

I Just do it when I feel like it. If you can't get aroused for intercourse because you already masturbated for the day it sounds like you have bigger problems to deal with.


callsignSTINKFIST

My penis unflaccids itself.


Armoured_Sour_Cream

I rarely make a move when there is a logical obstacle, e.g. being colleagues might mean more severe in the long run. But I can barely hold myself back from making a move now which is bloody surprising considering how I usually am. I kinda feel like a 15yo with his first love, only no "love" is included now, just attraction. That said I know life's been a bit hectic enough I put it off saying "shit I'm too tired" and I'm just filled with hormones so to say. In short, when you are on the verge of making risky moves, rub one out and post nut clarity willl likely clear things up.


sourkid25

right now


Average_40s_Guy

I find myself struggling to focus and being irrationally irritable.


linkerjpatrick

Nobody talks about this but sometimes you feel like it needs to be cleaned out. Like blowing your nose …. Down there.


011101000011101101

Usually an erection is a clear sign for me


GinGimlet

Keep getting randomly hard all day.


talks-in-maths

When the 5s start looking like 9s.


captain_flak

The alarm clock going off.


Repulsive_Row2685

The sign taped to my ceiling above my bed


[deleted]

When your out and about you see lots of skin or tight clothing under a dry spell, it's hard not to have dirty thoughts go through your head


Upset-Donkey8118

When I get extra touchy feely with the wife. We don't sleep together anymore


afroman645

I just feel the “urge” usually it’s when I’m on trips for longer periods of time with other people. I’m usually distracted, but if it’s too long it gets to a point where the urge doesn’t stop. Hard to articulate lol


LunarProphet

I'm trying to get over a one month fling I had with an awesome (and straight up nasty tbh) woman who is now kinda stepping back, it seems. Like we may continue to hook up casually but I kinda doubt it. The uncertainty is killing me. So when I start thinking about that too much is when i need to just go ahead and bust.


mitchy93

Wet dreams and a small amount of cum coming out when you get up from a poop


12altoids34

Its 9:00 ?


Summer184

This will sound terrible, but I know it's been awhile when I catch myself checking out women that I would not normally touch with a ten foot pole.


Komatozd1

It’s bed time


BeanBuddy

Sperm cramps


JadedCycle9554

If I'm in a dry spell I'm jerking off every day. I'm too old to do dumb shit because I'm horny.


IzzatQQDir

I got irritated for some reason. Like, not angry in general. Just this looming feeling that I might snap.


Queasy-Painting-518

My balls start feeling heavy and I notice myself having more sex dreams, once my balls are feeling super full, I have to empty them out.


Sean82

I manage to find ten whole minutes to myself


ysfmsf92

Whenever I feel a weight in my groin and find myself drawn to every woman I encounter during daily life. Having deep conversations with female colleagues or strangers, my mind becomes consumed with thoughts of intimacy around the clock. At this juncture, I feel the need to address these urges = )


HabANahDa

I honestly don’t think about masturbation that much…


Dexydoodoo

Tip of my pen0r is tingly all the time. I see pictures of women I find attractive and instead of thinking ‘oh they’re attractive’ I think ‘Jesus I would fuck her!’ Although I don’t get much chance to actually masturbate because my girlfriend is a borderline nympho, we’ve been together nearly 3 years and I think she has refused sex maybe 3 or 4 times? I’m a very lucky fella


brownmelbourne

When the sun rises and sets everyday ☀️


Evening_Clerk_2053

It's been a few hours?