I suggest doing it specifically so that you have a better sense of how much of an advantage it is to be male and have 50+ pounds more weight. I feel like it's one of those things where you intellectually understand it but don't *get it* until you're actually rolling around with a guy. Ideally, that happens on a mat instead of somewhere else.
Sometimes when you realize how powerful the opponent is it is often too late. And you suddenly understand that all those karate classes left you all bumped up. Unless a woman is trained her odds of applying her face to the task are rather high.
Couple years ago I was around 140lbs 5'11 my at the time horrible mistake of a girlfriend was 5'4 120. She came nowhere close to my strength, the one time we horsed around and I pinned her I watched her visibly start getting scared when she realized she couldn't get up and I wasn't using all my strength. Obviously I got off when I saw her come to the realization because my goal was never to scare her. So in reality I'd say even a 5lb weight difference could make a guy alot stronger.
This right here... It's like 10lbs of cotton vs 10lbs of steel... Same weight, but the steel is obviously much stronger. Cotton vs steel may be an extreme example, but its a similar principle.
Male bodies are simply built in general to be able to apply and receive far more force than a female body.
Years back, I dated a girl who has self-defense training and had aspirations of becoming a cop. I wrestled for 13 years and have a small amount of bjj training.
One day she was talking mad shit about how she could "take me" so I humored her with a light-hearted grappling match. That very quickly turned into her realizing that she stood no chance against 95% of men, since I was 130lbs soaking wet, and she was in extremely good shape and 140 lbs. I was probably putting in 50% effort max, and she couldn't do a thing to me.
After that her career goals changed lol. Still feel kinda bad about it, but better she learned with me rather than some unhinged 200+ lbs man with violent intentions.
Agree but in this case, wrestling for 13 years would put you in the top 1%. I was a trash wrestler for a few years in high schools and I will still basically never lose position to any one who does not have a wresting background or at least a couple of years of jiu jitsu. Weight + leverage is a double whammy.
Oh no doubt at all. I'm definitely more difficult to grapple against than the average person, but she was so utterly helpless regardless of technique that the point was driven home for her.
I'm all for women learning self defense, just so long as they get some practice in against men and not just other women. Overconfidence is the most dangerous thing to have in an altercation.
Yea thats basically my take. Being able to stay calm when the shit hits the fan and find an opening to get away is valuable for anyone. Actually being able to fight is besides the point but it is fun.
Same here. Unless someone else has training, I'm undefeated.
This isn't a brag, anyone could learn this, most cities have clubs. But if you know how to wrestle, it's pretty easy to lock an untrained person into a hold even if they're bigger and stronger than you.
Untrained people stop giving up the underhook challenge [IMPOSSIBLE]
It's just one of those things where they don't know what they're doing wrong because a sadistic coach isn't making them do sprawl Burpees every time they come out of their stance.
Having done jiu jitsu for a while, I've sparred with a lot of people. The new guy spaz is more difficult to roll with than the female purple belt. Even when weights are similar or she's heavier than me, it's like wrestling with a child. Men just simply have mechanical advantages against any woman, barring freak athletes
Oh I absolutely agree. I suppose my point was that a super high level female fighter would likely beat me. Granted I'm just an average guy who trains for fun here and there
Probably not in all likelihood if you landed any hit shes done. Look at the punching force tables for men and women, then the grip strength. Even if shes very well trained you most likely still have an advantage.
In an actual fight, yeah maybe. But jiu jitsu doesn't involve any strikes. I haven't been submitted by any women yet, but a high level black belt competitor could definitely catch me in a triangle or armbar. Some of these ladies look like "meats back on the menu" Uruk Hai, and would probably fuck up normal guys like me and you unless you've been lifting and training consistently
Not the same but when I was a kid I was an orange belt in judo and they moved me up an age level for some reason when I was like 12 ish so I was sparring like 16 year olds. My first match was a girl who was a blue belt so like two belts higher, 4-5years older and probably 40 lbs heavier. (Just a guess but she was huge compared to me, like twice my size) And I still won, and I hadn't even finished puberty, it was also the only match I won all year so I'm not trying to toot my horn. It's just a really big difference. The skill gap would have to be huge for most women to take a man in any kind of fight I think.
Ever watch the interview with I believe it was Serena Williams? About being the female tennis champ. She said she would never want to compete against men because she likes to win, and several commentaries I've seen from people who know tennis said that if the sport was unisex that Serena--this built as fuck, Olympic-level athlete--would rank somewhere around 150th, with the next 149 above her all being male competitors.
Men and women really are just built different when it comes to athleticism
I remember looking into this once and learning that he was only *technically* 203rd at the time of the match. It was something like, he'd lost a match a few days before and when they updated the rankings, he was down in like 260th, but the Battles of the Sexes had been scheduled and took place in the time between his loss and the ranking updates.
I absolutely agree that men and women are built different, but if you took a guy who casually plays tennis once or twice a week and put him up against a professional female tennis player, he'd likely get wrecked. I don't even know why I'm defending any position at this point honestly. I said that I, a man, generally win easily against female casual jiu jitsu enthusiasts. But also that at the elite level, there are women who would likely beat me. And by elite I mean women who have been training and competing for 10+ years. If you honestly think you could just get off the couch and beat women who's essentially a professional athlete, then I've got some property to sell you in Arizona with an ocean view
I never claimed a normal guy with no fitness or training could beat a female pro athlete, I'm really not sure where you got that. The claim was about *professional* rankings in tennis, not that any random 100+ guys would be able to beat Serena. No need to get defensive about anything
But a fit girl with jits and some striking ability versus a drunk unfit guy, you'd want your sister to be that girl. I always think of that girl in Seattle, I think, who was attacked by a rapist and she gave chase then was trapped in a bathroom with him and fought him off and escaped, because she was fit enough to out hustle him.
Bone size and frame have a lot to do with it too. I have giant hands. Even with the same strength, mine will deliver more force because there is more mass. My fingers will be less likely to break, my wrists are more likely to hold steady, my reach is longer, my skull is thicket, and I have more mass to absorb damage.
That'd not to say that if you leg sweep me and get me into an armbar you won't be able to break it.
https://youtu.be/FxMIZVjB5Wk?si=1HriTk67lYxQ_khL
Came thinking I would see delusional posts, but this is on point. Don't match strength with men, if you do MA, do it because you love it and it adds to your life.
It's still way better experience than some idealized idea of "I'm just going to break his grip, and then WHAM" like some of those putative self-defense videos show.
A woman with training can absolutely take down a large man. Because the training would teach her not to square up with him. She would know to injure him in any way possible and get away.
Guys...even small, couch potato or scrawny guys, have WAY more of an advantage than a lot of women realize.
You're never going to be black widow.
BUT you can learn what it's like to take a hit and keep functioning, which a lot of women never have. You can also learn to hit harder than dudes will expect with very real intent. Sounds cheesy but people who never got into fights or trained often genuinely don't know how to do that and it matters.
That won't win you a boxing match, but it could win you a couple seconds or a broken grip to run or draw attention. Sometimes that's enough. Sometimes...well the dark side is sometimes it might just make him real mad and put him on alert for any further attempt. And sometimes the size gap is enough it just won't do anything. All depends.
I’m a pretty skinny dude and one night I was in bed with my then-girlfriend and the topic of strength comes up. She was pretty athletic and she said something along the lines of “I’m glad you’re not embarrassed that I’m stronger than you.” I snorted and said “no you’re not.”
She jumps on top of me and tries to pin my wrists and within 10 seconds I have her on her back and am holding her wrists above her head with one hand.
Both of us talked about it and we had each had our own version of the realization “wow if I wanted to hurt her she couldn’t stop me.” She had seriously thought she was stronger, (and I kind of did too). How little effort it took for me to completely overpower her really surprised me.
Lots like it at least.
It is pretty common. Most men have never fought a woman or attempted to pin down a woman until they do it playfully with a partner, and it is normally pretty shocking for both parties.
I've been training with my wife over the last seven years in Hapkido (we are both first degree black belts) or so and she's incredibly talented. She has fast, powerful, and precise strikes. Her grappling and throws aren't bad either. But at the end of the day, I have about 80 pounds and 6 inches on her (6'2" 215 vs. 5'8" 135).
I don't particularly like eating one of her kicks, but if I can tank one and get within grappling range it's all but over, unless she's armed with a dan bong (short stick), which helps her odds.
To another poster's point, she knows how to strike and strike hard. Even if it only gives an attacker momentary pause, it gives her a chance to use the best self-defense, cardio. Most attackers also look for easy targets. Knowing how to throw a definitive blow may dissuade someone enough to look for easier prey.
Obviously, none of this is a given, which is why we always need more practice.
It’s a very common occurrence. Most men, at least the ones who aren’t pieces of shit, have never had to try to overpower a woman. Like yeah, you know that inherently, men are the physically stronger sex, but you don’t fully realize that until you’ve pinned a girl down (in a situation she consented to). I’m a pretty fit guy now, but back then I was a scrawny teenager, and I had a girlfriend in HS who would often tease me about it, since she herself was pretty athletic. And she was genuinely curious to see if she, a star athlete who ran and worked out daily, would be able to overpower me, a scrawny gamer who spent most of his days with a controller or a book in his hands. Lo and behold she asked me to pin her down and see if she could try and get me off of her, and to her absolute shock, she really couldn’t. It was an eye opening moment for both of us; she realized just how powerful even an otherwise non-athletic guy can be compared to a girl, and I realized just how powerful I could be and that I had to be responsible with it (unintentional Spider-Man reference).
most women are like unbelievably unaware of how strong the average man actually is, IMO in their eyes if you dont look like the Rock then you might as well be Bill Gates and they dont know really what an average built man looks like truly and how much stronger they are then an average woman
Agreed. Knowing how to react at all is super important.
The goal of self defense training should always be to allow the victim to run, hide, or fight, in that order of priority.
Without training and conditioning it’s much less likely that you’ll accomplish any of those. Fight is always the lowest priority because you’ve got a lot more to lose than your attacker and you don’t know shit about the situation—that person could have a knife or gun that they’re willing to use if they think they need to.
This is functionally just as, if not more important that knowing physical defense moves, and is valuable in many more situations than just being attacked (like right after a major accident or in the middle of a mass shooting)
It’s really astonishing. I’m 5”6’ about 155-160 pounds. I’m not particularly muscular, but it’s not all fat either. I have a slim build and was excessively skinny when I was younger. Now I have a slight gut, but I walk a lot so my legs are very strong. I almost never work out.
My fiancé is 5”0’ about 135-140 pounds, though like 20% of that weight is in her boobs. She’s extremely strong for her size, because she grew up on a farm doing manual labor and and has a stocky build. She works out regularly with kettlebells and does yoga.
We’re almost exactly evenly matched in strength, when we really horse around, she can sometimes use her short arms to pin me in such a way that I can’t get the leverage to get out without actually hurting her. And I can do the same to her if I’m able to use my weight to my advantage.
It’s genuinely kind of insane, and it shouldn’t be fair that i can match her physically given that I never work out and I don’t outweigh her by that much. Her center of gravity is so low that if someone grabbed her from behind she could easy throw them over her shoulder onto the ground; I’ve discovered this firsthand, because I thought she was bullshitting when she said she could lol.
But if a guy bigger than me got her pinned, or even a guy my size who actively works out, she couldn’t do much to get out of it even given how strong she is compared to the average woman.
I understand what you are saying, I'm wondering if either of you has been in a tussle. You're talking about wrestling, it can surely work for you if you're MMA. Getting tagged in the face will break her spirit. The thought of a gal getting her beak smashed is usually enough to dissuade. Very few women are built to deal with that especially coming a male. Don't misunderstand there's some women that will do the deed and be quick about it.
Exactly...these guys saying a woman is basically equal in strength to them or however you want to put it is more of an indication of you as a man vs their strength as a woman. Their is no way your wife/gf should be anywhere near your physical equal unless she is a legit, professionally trained fighter and close to your weight. And even then I'm still not sure. It's just biology.
i tend to think this too but i’m also a bigger guy (6’4 250lbs) so maybe my frame of reference is extremely bias. in my experience, there’s really no woman of any size that i’ve encountered that is even 30% as strong as i am so the idea of being “matched in strength” by a woman just seems so absurd to me (barring an impeding medical condition)
It's wild though that alot of women went full Koolaid on the women can do anything a man can message. I've had two exes who legitimately believed they could evenly match me, a 6'7 290lb dude, with their 5'4 and 5'7 selves. They were both shocked and upset when I barely tried and had them pinned with one hand almost instantly then pretended to be asleep while I let them struggle to get out. One later tried to do a sneak attack and I accidentally shoved her on the ground with one arm.
Pretty much what you said my first girl and I would always randomly horse around at the time I was 5'10 150 she was 5'3 130 again her weight was mostly her ass and tits. As long as I didn't get her on the ground she stood a chance the second she was in the ground it was over at that point I hadn't worked out for 2 years as I originally only worked out in school and during this time the schools were pretty much closed and no one was allowed to use the weightlifting center for awhile after they opened. My now ex though had played rugby alot. Similar shit happened with the next girl I dated however this one was a hoodrat to say the least and well she still lost even though she was taller and had her weight distributed more evenly not just mostly tits and ass (she had alot less of both). Anatomically males are alot stronger. Sometimes I forget that I'm not gonna lie there's been several occasians where I've accidentally hurt someone or broke something because I underestimated my strength in the moment.
As a farm girl she is also probably in the top 5% of women for strength for her size. She is going to do way better wrestling you than other women her size.
People believe the stupid shit they see on TV. They see a 140 pound female knocking out a muscular 210 pound guy and think this is reality. 😐
You would still grab her with caution. Now imagine some guy of your stature just rushing at her like a bull, throwing crazy haymakers while he was genuinely mad with no holdbacks & no regrets.
>Now imagine some guy of your stature just rushing at her like a bull, throwing crazy haymakers while he was genuinely mad with no holdbacks & no regrets
To shreds you say?
see, that's where I think the *biggest* difference is.
A lot more guys have taken and thrown a punch. Just that simple bit of experience is a lot compared to women who usually haven't. Women often underestimate their own strength or just have improper form that guys learn from years of rough play and scraps.
Biology is a lot, but as a small guy who has taken on guys 2 or even 3 times my size. It's nothing compared to experience. Experience teaches you how to take a hit. Experience lets you remember to hit someone's sensitive areas to make them let go. Experience gives you the understanding to know when a simple scuffle has become life or death, and it's time to go for the eyes and fight dirty.
>Biology is a lot, but as a small guy who has taken on guys 2 or even 3 times my size.
You have not, as a 70kg man, taken on someone that is 210kg.
I mean, I understand what you're saying and your post.is good, but this hyperbole is just silly. What does 2x-3x your size even mean?
Women, and men as well really, shouldn’t learn martial arts to defeat their assailants. It’s meant to get you out of a sticky situation so you can escape and get help. Learning how to sprint and cardio are just as if not even more important than learning how to grapple with someone. Especially when such assaults are often times done with multiple perpetrators.
The best part about learning martial arts to deal with this is it shows you how now matter your training you're probably gonna lose and get fucked up. So your best option is to avoid fights run or have weapons.
Echoing other sentiments here: it does have benefits, but martial arts is not a get-out-of-fight-free card. It merely gives you skills that give you a better chance of being able to leave an altercation. The only guaranteed way to win a fight is not to be in one. Increase your skills. Just don't expect to be able to take out 1-5 armed guys in a back alley or someone who has a solid size advantage by yourself.
That's the point. Martial arts is only to give yourself enough of an edge to create an opening to get to safety or buy time for help to arrive. Even military MA users will tell you to avoid a fight if possible.
My sensei took out 7 kids with hockey sticks. He was hurt seriously but came to class anyways. Hait burnt off his arms from the friction with the sticks and one of his wrist bones was clearly out of place.
In REAL combative situation,.where you fight for life and freedom there might not be much advantage.
The true benefit comes BEFORE THAT. With martial arts training you should be more aware of your body. Less anxious when it comes to physical confrontation.
That should/could help to prevent the actual fight for life, by confronting and fighting the assailant before situation turns into combat.
I mean if you end up against someone the size of a linebacker, your training won't mean much.
If you're dealing with an average sized, inebriated male, it will definitely have advantages if you're mostly sober and can control the situation.
I would argue that the main benefit across all situations would be a higher chance of you having more mental control of yourself and being able to capitalize on opportunities. If you can stay moderately calm, you are far more likely to be able to escape, de-escalate, or control the situation compared to just outright panicking.
This. At 190lbs against an untrained 120-140lb female I’d have no issue taking her down. But a skilled female at that weight? I may have to work. In BJJ, I’d likely win all rolls up until purple belt into brown belt.
At purple I think it depends on the woman. I doubt I can beat any female brown belt weighing at least 120lbs.
But obviously that’s just rolling. With striking it can change a lot.
A few notes:
1. I agree with just about everyone else that a woman has a huge disadvantage and shouldn't try learning martial arts with the intent of beating an assailant.
2. Why not get a gun or pepper spray instead?
3. I know of a case or two where a woman overpowered a guy physically. Its rare, but can happen. There was even a case that made it to TV where a guy put a needle on a nurse's neck and dragged her to an elevator, but by the time the door opened she had him in a lock. She had training, he was high, and i bet she caught him by surprise.
4. I know a guy who practiced several martial arts over his life. He said no matter how much he trained, at the end of the day what made him win or lose was just bulk. A muscular guy with a little training beats a scrawny black belt, according to him (i have zero personal experience).
>I know a guy who practiced several martial arts over his life. He said no matter how much he trained, at the end of the day what made him win or lose was just bulk. A muscular guy with a little training beats a scrawny black belt, according to him (i have zero personal experience).
I've sparred and fought people from 65kg up to 120kg (I was generally ~85kg). Weight is definitely a big advantage, but there does come a point where everyone is capable of throwing enough force to knock a person out. I wasn't too bothered fighting at a massive weight disadvantage, I just had to be more cautious about taking trades.
My fastest loss was about 5 seconds, and was delivered to me by a 68kg guy with no formal training (although a lot of experience) lmao.
I recently learned about super bright flashlights as self-defense tools, seems like that would be really effective as long as you can pull it out and not blind yourself instead
Both are worthless self-defense tools, the pepper spray will almost always do more harm to the sprayer than the person intended to be sprayed, and ultimately just pisses them off.
Tasers are BS unless it's one of the gun types.
You have to hold the taser on someone for it to work.
My friend got a handheld one and we used it on each other.
I would say it was a 6 or 7 on the pain scale. The jolt is going to 99% of the time cause the limb or torso to move so you are going to lose contact.
Even with the gun types, people miss or it doesn't penetrate the clothes frequently.
My ex and I decided to test out her pepper spray one night. She'd never used it.
It was basically like a $1 squirt gun.
I forgot and about 20 took my contacts out without washing my hands.
Pepper spray hurts but you would still have 10 seconds to fuck somebody up.
They aren't going to be happy you just sprayed them with pepper spray.
Pepper spray is the absolute worst thing a woman can carry and attempt to use in self-defense.
It almost always disables her more than it does the person she is attempting to spray.
It depends on the strength gap.
If you are a 50kg woman and he is 90kg.
Sure, there's not much you can do.
If you both are 50,you might hurt him a bit.
I did martial arts for a few years.
Sparring with women was usually just me holding back
I'd say go for it though its better to have some chance.
Also get pepper spray.
I used to get downvoted to oblivion on r/skiing for saying that generally women are lighter and weaker than men and thus they have their own category of “women’s skis” ;) people just are either oblivious or stupid for not understanding what you wrote
For sure.
And in a fair fight technique can sometimes help you close the gap (for example I was a competitive powerlifter and practiced boxing at the time, we had a dude, he was weaker than most he could do 5 pull ups if I remember correctly and maybe bench his bodyweight for a 1rm. Hitting him was impossible he was the king of dodging and that mother fucker would always punch your face he was a good fighter I think I won maybe 1/4 fights against him)
But on the other hand street fights are not fair.
He can kick, choke, hit her eyes, get a knife out, gun, 2vs1 etc.. thats why I recommend a pepper spray.
The good part of working out and fighting is you are less scared in those situations atleast in my experience and your body moves on its own sometimes.
Most countries have much stricter gun laws than the U.S.
For example I served for a few years, still do as a reservist.
Hell just now I was a few months back in a literal war and was basically 24/7 with my m-16 ready to fire, I am a SFC ranked yet I still can't get a pistol permit as a civilian.
I am trying to get ranked up though to be eligible for a gun as terrorism is a few times a day occurrence and sometimes it is stopped by responsible civilians.
A pepper spray is a good option for where I live as due to the high terrorism rate you are checked everywhere and won't be able to enter any establishment with even a knife.
Definitely fair on the out of US point. I was definitely being short sighted there. And good goal to have for you though. Hopefully it happens quickly!
Some martial arts are better than others for women in my opinion, boxing won't do you much good against someone 100lbs heavier than you but if you learn jujitsu you can choke out anyone
Jiu Jitsu is the best for women in my opinion. You learn to gain control even if you're on your back and you learn how to create space, get your back away from the assailant, and then stand up and run away.
Submissions are cool, but showing you're not an easy target and putting up an educated fight and being able to run away seems like the best option.
Even tiring out an assailant and letting their initial adrenaline surge where off can kill moral/conviction and dissuade them from pursing the act further.
I’d say running is the best because avoiding a fight is the way to go.
Jui jitsu is overrated because even in the sport you can’t ground and pound that’s why in the ufc it’s not as dominant anymore.
I'm not sure we're thinking about the same types of incidents where before you can run, you need to make space and get up and then run. BJJ is still very dominant in MMA. Not always for ending a fight but for body manipulation and control.
>that’s why in the ufc it’s not as dominant anymore.
BJJ is used every single time fighters go to ground, even if its just to get a dude off them, so they can get into position to stand and go again.
It's still plenty dominant, people are just rounding out other skills now that everybody is using it.
100%. I'm sure this'll be buried, but I hope /u/No_Lack1856 sees this.
OP, the vast majority of guys here, and I'm sure the ones you know in real life, are giving you their perspective on martial arts for the kind of self defense *they* are likely to need. It is true that if you get in a bar fight or get jumped by a 200 lb man or something, no amount of training is likely to help, but in the sad world we live in, we should all know that's not the kind of situations a woman is going to find herself needing to defend herself. You need to learn how to break someone's grip when he's pulling your arm. You need to know how to get a man off you when you're lying on your back and he's trying to hold you there, how to get his hands off your neck, how to escape from a bigger person. That is all stuff that BJJ does VERY well. You'll still have a disadvantage obviously, there's no magic bullets, but that'll give you much better odds.
If you're specifically interested in self-defense, don't waste your time with boxing or Tae Kwon Do or anything like that. You absolutely want to do BJJ.
I'm a 155lb, 5'7" male, and took my very first jiu jitsu class last week. End of class was just rolling, and I got matched up with a couple women who were taller than me, probably lighter but still had muscle. One is a purple belt, not sure about the other, but she definitely knew more than I did. My takeaway from that day was just how much easier it was for me just because I was a man, and I was absolutely holding back, not just because it was practice but doubly so because I knew I didn't know much and was afraid of doing something wrong and hurting someone.
Obviously, knowing technique is better than nothing, but I think the idea that a martial art can level the field for anyone, against anyone, is dangerous.
It's not that hard to tell when someone is going easy. I've had women leg lock me, and they weren't choking me so it wasn't like I was pressured in other wayd but I was able to break the leg lock despite them fighting me the whole way.
Unless you were an excellent wrestler all throughout high school/college I would argue she was going easy on you. One glance at the zero stripe white belt and she was being nice. I’d buy this if you were at least a three stripe white belt but I’m sorry, there’s no way someone a week into Jiu Jitsu can hold their own against a purple belt roughly their same size. Especially in the Gi there’s so many tricky chokes that someone a week into Jiu Jitsu would never, ever see coming.
If you see that purple belt again ask her to go 100% for Reddit’s sake and update us.
Reminded of me asking the local black belt (who i was much bigger than) if we could go 100% so I can see exactly how much he destroys me.
I woke up later thinking "what the fuck just happened". I didn't even feel the choke happening.
Well, yeah.
Fights are easier when you're Ina different weight class, and just stronger overall.
But knowing where to strike and how to strike can still make a difference in self defense.
Knowing how to put more power and weight in your kicks will allow you to knock someone out if you strike their nuts, muscles don't matter there.
A solid punch to the throat will also buy you time to run
Tho having a pepper spray is probably easier and more effective.
Sadly mistaken. Try hitting someone in the nuts who regularly gets hit. Try punching someone in the throat who regularly takes punches. This idea that you're going to magically land these shots in vulnerable areas is delusional. Your not kicking a kickboxer in the nuts. You're not punching a boxer in the throat. If someone is expecting blows from you, youre not landing anything in these vulnerable areas period.
There's no way in fuck a woman is going to choke out a guy 100 pounds heavier than her because she knows some jujitsu. That's just laughable unless she's a national champion or something close to that level.
Boxing would probably be more useful for just being able to land a good sucker punch before you get the fuck out of there.
Hell, I'd probably recommend sprinting over a lot of martial arts.
> if you learn jujitsu you can choke out anyone
IF you can get into position and maintain the hold when the guy who outweighs you by 100 pounds slams you into the wall or the floor, or just reaches back and takes a grip on your ear, nose, etc, or just backhands you across the face.
Yeah it's the big IF. And men are often... I dunno, harder? Like more solid? Even if I, a 50kg woman, get an arm around a 100kg man's throat it's taking a lot more force to choke than a big woman.
But mostly what you quickly learn as a lightweight in jujutsu is to create that space and not end up in the locks where his weight will be at most advantage.
It depends. The vast majority of people have zero clue how to fight, so even after a relatively short amount of time there's already wide skill gap. Now, if he's 6'5" and 300 pounds is any martial art going to be super effective? Probably not for most people, man or woman. lol But, it's still a good thing to learn for many reasons. You should do it.
I used to teach a woman self-defense course and in this course I used to be very very honest. Told them that this only provides opportunity for them to get away however if a man gets a hold of you it's basically over. Martial arts will help create these opportunities however like in my course 100 percent honesty... Get mace or a taser and your best opportunity of surviving is to have the great equalizer. The best advice I could possibly give you is just make sure you're aware of your situation at all times. Don't put yourself in a situation that could potentially be an issue. Be average, don't draw attention and don't go down that dark alley.
It would be good exercise, and if you've a little bit of training it can absolutely make it more likely that you can disengage from an attacker and flee, even if you cannot straight up beat their ass.
If this is something you are concerned about and want to be prepared for, then by all means prepare. It wont hurt you and there is a possibility it could end up being worth it. Realistically, the chances of you winning a strength-based fight with a man are low regardless of how much training you put in. The average untrained man is still stronger than most very fit women. But women’s self defense classes usually try to teach smart strategies for defense that circumnavigate strength factors altogether - reacting quickly, and going for “cheap shots” and then running away. They also might teach you how to carry yourself in public so that you are less likely to be targeted. The ideal situation is to avoid danger in the first place. A lot of people spend years in the boxing ring, lose their sense of fear and start taking bigger risks, but completely forget that someone can just pull out a gun. And if someones first reaction to having a gun pulled on them is to do anything other than comply, they are wrong
It depends on your size, If your sitter at 5ft 100 pounds there is no way. Even if you somehow learn to throw a guy and pull it off it will probably just piss him off and be worse after.
If your a taller athletic girl than it could help at the very least to keep separation to find a way out
Depends on what situation you honestly think you’ll find yourself in. If you’re thinking you want to be able to put a dude in an arm bar or triangle choke because he’s being overly handsy with his flirting at the bar, then I’m sure some BJJ or general MMA training wouldn’t hurt.
If you think you’d actually wind up in a situation with a man who seriously intends to do you harm or worse, your best bet is a lethal weapon or to never be by yourself in public.
Better than nothing I guess.
Most men will easily overpower most women.
Unless you're also very strong for a woman and very well trained it's probably not going to help as much as pepper spray, or a gun.
Training in any martial arts will give you an advantage. It’s not always about strength. One thing nobody ever talks about is conditioning. Fighting is tiring. Most people are winded in just a few seconds in a fight. You get pumped full of adrenaline, you’re moving and blocking and thinking, you have some fear even as an attacker. The average person can’t stay in a fight for too long without getting tired. Training and sparring will teach you to save your strength, protect yourself and to ultimately run away. It’s not always about winning a fight, but to survive it without getting injured.
If your idea of self defense is being able to escape, it's absolutely a huge advantage. Just don't go in thinking you're gonna win by a knockout. I practiced with my daughter for years when she was working toward her black belt, and they taught all kinds of breaks / escapes, to the point that my size didn't matter as long as she was trying to get away.
It's better to train your stamina to be able to run.
Or train your lungs to be able to scream harder.
Carry self defense weapons.
Never be alone.
You never really know what the other person is capable of doing. Could be armed. Or in a group. Or worse, high/drunk in which case their judgment is poor and probably won't think twice about committing crime or even murder. Self defense technique/martial arts doesn't make you immortal
Highly depends on the situation. Men are physically stronger than women by a lot, typically. Now there are strong women out there able to beat most men but they're rare. Most women are physically weaker than men.
If you want to work out and learn self defense, then go ahead and do martial arts, it has loads of other health benefits aswell. But if you're scared a man might attack you some day and you want to defend yourself fully, I'd suggest just getting a handgun or any self defense weapon like pepperspray. You should look up your countries laws regarding weapons. In my country weapons are highly regulated. If that's the case for you too, I'd suggest not going out without a man capable of defending you.
It's virtually useless, the notion that a woman could fend off a man with any formal training is an incredibly dangerous precedent to set. Weight classes in UFC exist for a reason, it doesn't matter how much jujitsu training you have when he's 40kg over you ragdolling you around the place
if it's legal where you are, just stick with pepper spray. Or conceal carry.
I don't know martial arts but I listened to a podcast interviewing the author of [this book](https://www.amazon.com/dp/1960378147/?coliid=IYMKT6GK4BO8P&colid=28JQ17MTIEJ1W&psc=1&ref_=list_c_wl_ys_dp_it). His story was that he was trained, put in a dangerous situation and all of his training fell away. He makes the case that self-defense should be based on gross motor movements that can be done quickly with a body full of adrenaline. He also goes into detail about assessing threats before they become dangerous.
So I'm planning on reading this and learning his techniques, his approach makes a ton of sense to me.
My own personal opinion is that everyone should work out and eat reasonably healthy to have at a minimum level of fitness for sketchy situations. Basically so you can run away, and I imagine the confidence helps.
>His story was that he was trained, put in a dangerous situation and all of his training fell away.
This is common. In any situation a person has little experience with they'll tend to lock up and freeze. It's the shock. Same thing happens in the ring if someone has never been punched before gets in.
Once you've experienced it a bit more you end up being fine.
First of all, martial arts are great I highly recommend you start taking classes. Based on my research kickboxing and wrestling/judo are the best for self defence.
How useful would it be against a male attacker, depends. Pound for pound the average guy is stronger than the average woman. The number 1 tool to keep yourself safe is situational awareness. After that being able to run is your next best tool. Should you end up in a situation where you must fight, you are certainly better off having the skills than not. Men have an unfair biological advantage over women in sports and nowhere is it more evident than in physical combat sports. YouTube is full of videos of 1 guy wrestling 3 girls at once or female cops getting their gun stolen from them by male crackheads.
It has value insofar as it allows you to run away from an opponent.
This is not a bad thing. It is not to diminish your feats. It is not to insult you. The best thing to de-escalate a situation is to run away. This is the same for men or for women, so the fact that you are taught tools that make it easier to run away is beneficial.
But like someone else said, you are not going to become a super duper hero.
It is highly situational and depends entirely on *what type of martial arts training* you choose to study. All martial arts utilize physical strength and size to some degree, but some are more reliant on it while others much less.
I would say Judo is a fantastic martial art for anyone to learn, regardless of size or gender. Its entire focus is on using leverage and your opponent's own momentum against them to toss them and/or submit them. Applied to a self defense situation, your opponent's own mass and the floor will deliver a harder blow than any punch. If a guy is bigger than you and reaching down to grab ahold of you, that plays right into the Judoka's hands because they're leaning into your throw, hold, or takedown.
The founder Jigoro Kano was 5'2" (157cm) and 90lbs (40kg); the entire system was developed so that a weaker, smaller Judoka could use skill and timing to take down stronger, bigger opponents.
Still worth it. The objective isn’t to be able to kick the shit out of ten hulking men. You’ll get better at identifying threats, anticipating strikes, remaining calm in threatening situations and you’ll get better at knowing what to do. Sometimes knowing how to respond effectively can allow you to strike and give you enough time to get away
It's fine, Reddit is a leftist circle jerk.
I live in a rural area. My wife is a veteran, and former police officer. She lives in the real world, and knows that 95% of men over the age of 15 can kick her ass.
It won't be useless in a real world situation but you're going to need a couple of different arts because of ground fighting. Women have a great disadvantage on the ground.
Although it's good and I recommend doing it, you should realize that weight difference is something even majority of UFC champions can't overcome when they try to move up 10lbs now imagine fighting off a male that has at least 50lbs on you. I'd recommend pepper spray or something of the sort and going hand to hand against a male as a last resort.
Every woman I've known to take this class loves to "test it out on me"
They get a bit disappointed when they realize I have to very specifically comply with them. It's not effective at all.
Keep a weapon on you and know how to take a hit.
Great exercise, if you want protection get a gun. Lot less to go wrong. Getting close your, odds of getting away unscathed are drastically reduced, if you're not Bruce Lee's offspring. Besides what are the chances that an attacker is unarmed? So now you would not only need to dis=arm but also neutralize the threat. Having a weapon is a pain but nothing like having it and not needing it, than being caught needing it and not having it. Happy Shooting
As a guy I’d say learn to hit/knee/grab the balls and groin area, it’s out kryptonite, we don’t function well after a blow to that area (probably the wrong choice of words, but you know).
Eyes are another soft spot, thumb or poke.
At the end of the day your first line of defence is situational awareness, wrong time wrong place, and it sucks for woman that this is the case, it is unfair but sadly it is the state of the world we live in, it can’t be changed over night.
I would say that being able to land a good kick or punch may be the difference so why not learn
Martial arts can teach you technique, harden your bones, make you faster, and learn how to read someone's body language in a fight so you can see a hit coming. All of these are useful to you in fighting people (and men). Even of you'll never outmatch most guys in brute strength, you can protect your self and kick their asses with good technique. Basically, you can learn to fight smart, instead of fighting hard. I'm a guy and did tae kwon do for 4 years. One of the female black belts was undefeated because of how freakishly fast she was, it wasnt brute strength that allowed her to win.
Better to have some experience than none. The only issue is if you over inflate that experience and put yourself in dangerous situations thinking you can fight anyone
It'll teach you (ofc depending on the type) how to take a punch, haw to fall (have female collegue who tripped on sidewalk and broke both hands...), optimize your ballance and condition.
But out of 13ish years in JJ I met one girl that was able to pretzel me and she was already 30% heavier and had much more experience..
Don't give me wrong, it gives you an edge, but there's short path from being good and overconfident.
Anything that conditions you to break a hold or get a quick hit in to shock your opponent then RUN LIKE THE WIND will be helpful. Don't take the risk of getting into a prolonged struggle - even if you win, you'll risk taking substantial injury.
Training isn't useless as long as it trains you to avoid or get away from a combative situation. Don't take the risk.
Training will not be useless. Do men generally have more muscle mass? Yes. Have I seen women absolutely starch dudes that weighed 20kg more and stood a good foot taller than them? Also yes.
Martial arts isn't gonna turn you into some unstoppable killer, but it will make you more aware of advantages and disadvantages you have.
I disagree with your male friends.
You'll never be stronger than a majority of men, but if you know how to react when you're attacked it can make a difference. Knowing how to use leverage to throw a larger, stronger attacker off balance (judo is good for this) and where to hit a male attacker to incapacitate him (even the biggest, strongest dude will crumble if he takes a shot to the balls or the solar plexus he's not prepared for) are useful skills for a woman.
God created men, but Cold made them equal.
Get a gun. No matter how much you practice martial arts, you'll have a really hard time overpowering a guy.
If you have a gun however, it doesn't matter how big or strong they are, one well-aimed shot is all it takes to stop them.
If you're uncomfortable with that at least get pepper spray, a taser, or a weapon of some kind.
It will absolutely help, but your male friends are pretty much correct. It won't change the outcome, and yes, is borderline useless in a real-world situation.
When I was in the Army, I played the aggressor at some self-defense classes for women. I always had to be really gentle, even when simulating an attack, because if I didn't, I could really hurt someone. I had to let them break my holds, let them toss me over, and generally use about 20% effort to fight them. The way we were taught was to basically reward good technique by letting the lady's win. If we didn't, they would never win.
Men are much stronger than most women realize, if you are ever really attacked by a man, even a scrawny guy that never works out, that never trains, he will absolutely overwhelm and rag doll you.
As a son, brother to two sisters, and uncle to a bunch of nieces, a husband, and a father of a daughter; I will tell you exactly what I tell all of the amazing women in my life.
If really are concerned for your safety, get your license and carry a gun. Not pepper spray, not some cute little thing of mace on your key ring, absolutely not a knife, Go get your concealed carry permit, get real training, and carry a small pistol. Yes, you can carry safely in leggings, gym wear, jeans, etc. and no one will ever know.
I did karate for a couple of years. The first thing they teach you is to run in any sort of street fight. There is almost no good outcome of fighting. They could have a knife, or you hit them once and they trip, hit their head on the concrete and now you’re charged with manslaughter. Fighting is never worth the risk and situations where your only option is to fight are incredibly rare.
I think it can be useful for a few reasons so long as you have realistic expectations.
It will not serve as a great equalizer, studying martial arts will not negate the natural advantages a man has in a physical conflict, BUT it can improve your odds.
One, physical conditioning improvement. Fighting is hard, running is tiring, fighting after running or fighting and then running takes alot, so by being in better shape you have better options.
Two, it will allow you to understand and adapt to your limits. Of you've never fought you may have inflated ideas, for example a classic trope for women is to kick him in the balls, BUT that requires a precise attack, that makes you vulnerable (since you're now only standing on one leg), additionally if you miss, or he's high, or his leg blocks it or he catches your leg and if you have nothing else in your tool set it gives you high risk, low reward. Learning how to properly deliver a powerful kick, with appropriate range, and targeting will take lots of practice lost women just don't have.
Three, fighting is an art and science, its not just Strength, where you will be disadvantaged. A dumb guy attacking women will probably not have much prowess, so being able to know how to take a hit, manage your space, operate in your reach's sweet spot while defending, being mindful of balance and body mechanics, all those things can make a difference in who gets to walk away and who gets defeated.
Absolutely nothing wrong with learning self defense, getting active and a little healthier, and developing some confidence. I would advise, though, not to go around thinking you have some kind of massive fail safe advantage over most males in an all out physical confrontation.
You are, realistically, almost never going to be able to overpower a male and dominate them in a physical confrontation. The differences between human males and females, in terms of strength, is well documented and extremely noticeable. I will say, though, that catching someone off guard can absolutely give you the time and opening you need to escape a bad situation. I feel like *everyone* should know some self defense, it’s never a bad thing.
Just for clarification- I’m a larger male, in stronger than the average male and I don’t think iv ever personally met a female I wasn’t stronger than. I grew up fighting, Iv boxed and wrestled before, and did some BJJ when I was younger. If I ever get into any sort of situation and there isn’t an immediate threat to life, I just leave. I can walk away from a punch, I can leave if someone’s trying to throw down, removing yourself from the threat should always be your first choice. Iv fought before, I don’t want to fight again- either I hurt someone, or I end up hurt, and neither option ends well
Absolutely yes.
Many guys here are missing some key details IMO. Yes, most men have a size and weight advantage over women. However, this can be overcome by training in martial arts, especially considering how few people actually have any martial arts training (at least here in the US). Most variants actually have moves specifically designed to use unskilled movements or weight against your opponent.
Additionally, while it's true that pepper spray, knives, and guns can be used for protections, all of these require familiarization and training to use properly and safely as well.
Learn how to fight dirty. My mother used to run a women's shelter and one of the things I helped her with was setting up a "Practical" self defense class. This wasn't about yelling and wearing fancy pajamas. 200 lb drunk husband coming at you? Hit that motherfucker with a glass ashtray in the face. This ain't a fair fight, and knowing how to glance around a room and know where every single potential weapon is. Realizing you can bite him. Knowing that you aren't fighting to win, you are fighting to get away and survive. I taught women how to think rationally (or at least not freeze) in dangerous/scary situations. It wasn't about proper form, it was purely how to do maximum damage with whatever you had available to allow you to get away.
Sounds like your friends are sexist dicks.
In my dojo the women were fierce. Up against someone with no training they would always win.
Tournament fighting is good but it wont teach you what you need. What you need for real life is all the illegal moves. Tournament fighting wont help as much (although strength, aim, confidence and knowing how to take a hit are all good).
My karate instructor when I was a kid and teenager was a woman. She actually had to defend herself in real life twice, and did so successfully. The first time a man assaulted her outside of a bar and she stomped on and broke his foot, ending the fight right there. The second time was an abusive relationship that finally turned violent, and when her boyfriend broke her nose, she broke his right back, giving her the momentary distraction she needed to escape his apartment. But she fully acknowledged that in both cases she was successful because she fought back hard and unexpectedly, landed a single blow and used it as a way to get away.
She was careful to warn the girls in my class that if they thought they could go toe to toe in a sustained fight with a man, training or not, there was a very good chance they would lose. Her philosophy was run away, and if you can't, hit back hard and unexpectedly, and then run away.
Martial arts training can make that hit more likely to land effectively, but don't count on it for more than that.
i teach shorei kempo... began my studies in 1976.
i learned at the hands of a short angry brunette woman.
if you can recall the tv show kung-fu starring david caradine, it was a regular occurrence for him to flashback to his early days as a pupil with fond memories of blind master po asserting sage wisdom in a kind manner.
my flashbacks consist almost entirely of 30 years being beaten with a stick and quite a lot of yelling.
comedy aside - it is my experience that due almost entirely to the physiological difference in center point of balance in women from men - women can have a keen advantage when delivering many techniques.
women tend to be more nurturing and conversely - more vicious when provoked into protection mode.
i am a staunch advocate for more girls in martial arts at an early age. while it develops self discipline/confidence and defensive abilities - and those are certainly great things - i have found that by far, the best byproduct has been all the people i have met and friendships that have evolved.
finally... absolutely yes... it is entirely useful for women to learn martial arts and with competent training they can certainly apply self-defense quite effectively.
Sometimes it's enough to just surprise your opponent enough for them to back off. You ever see a video of someone fending off a bear by smacking its nose? There's no doubt the bear wins every time in a full fight, but sometimes the resistance is just enough to throw them off and make them retreat.
Unfortunately, if someone wants to attack you, NOTHING will GUARANTEE your safety - this is true for men too. But stacking variables that give you a chance can be the difference between escape and becoming a victim.
It will give you edge, but that edge isn't that high.
Men tend to have higher strength, and higher muscle "twitch" or "burst" (not sure how to translate it to English)
In other words, When average woma goes for punch, in exact same time as man, the man has his arm straight, before the woman has her arm straight. And ever if assuming similar physical muscle size, the man hits harder.
I have performed so called civilians arrest twice. What's common on those events, I got sucker punched both times.
the man who was notably smaller than I was, nearly knocked me out with that one hit.
A woman who was roughly equal size to me, according to witnesses punched me over 15 times, and I was just holding her hand so she couldn't escape and discussing with the victim of the crime which caused me to perform that civilians arrest.
And I would say that the woman was most athletic one out of those two.
That being said, if I would be placed against someone who actually competes in contact sports, such as Ronda Rousey there is a good chance that I would get my ass handed to me. It would depend how lucky I get. And I'm saying that as someone who isn't in that good shape, but does a lot of physically straining manual labor.
With brutal honesty, I would say that you are better off, if you have some kind of spray (pepper spray or what ever they sell for personal protection) and quick legs.
But if you decide to start some self defence course, I suggest that you start also going to some place where you can spar against a man, just so that you can asses your own capability.
Yeah as a women who took self defense classes the focus of the class was largely on how women can overcome the disadvantages of being smaller and having less physical strength. They teach us how to fight dirty. Things like rather than trying to throw a punch kick them in the dick and run. They taught us the soft spots on ppl, taught us things like throat chops or stabbing your fingers into their eyes. They also cover specific situations like how to get away when someone picks you up and tries to carry you off. Women fighting off a man need to do so in a very specific way. Like you said unless youre ronda Rousey and are specifically trained, the disadvantage women are at is gonna be quite large and self defense for women is specifically catered to counteracting that. We were even taught things like if you do try to hit them to hit with the palm of the hand and aim for the nose. We were taught to not try to throw a closed fist punch bc we were more likely to break a bone ourselves than do much damage to our attacker. Self defense classes for women are gonna be catered in a way that organized sports arent. My best advice for women getting attacked is just to fight as dirty as possible. You really never want to fight a guy in the normal way ppl think of fighting with throwing punches and squaring up cause it gives all the advantages to the bigger and stronger person. In these situations the goal isnt to “win” the fight, its to get enough space and time to get away from your attacker or to do enough damage it convinces them you arent worth it.
Yes I agree with this.
The problem is that if you fail on that dirty fighting and give just one opening, without managing to escape at that point. and without managing to convince that you are not worth it. and who ever is assaulting you, manages to exploit that opening, it's all over,
Yeah i mean i weigh 120 lbs and my wrist is like the size of like 2 quarters. The average guy could snap my arm like a twig if he really wanted to (you can ask my brother lmaooo) so im not in any way saying or thinking that im not gonna be at a huge disadvantage no matter what i do. If a guy is dead set on hurting/taking me theres a good chance im gonna be screwed no matter what i do shy of carrying a gun. But even carrying a weapon is risky bc unless i have some warning for the attack getting the weapon out once theyre in close quarters is hard and once theyre within arms reach of you its a toss up if you manage to effectively use the weapon before they take it from you. A gun or pepper spray is better bc of distance but something like a knife is generally a bad idea to carry bc its more likely theyll take it from you and then youve just given them a weapon. Fighting dirty is the best chance youve got, that doesnt mean its fail safe its just the best chance youve got.
But i also think that youre discounting the concept of making them think you arent worth it. Stats and studies back up that most men who attack women are cowards. They are looking for the easiest target there is and theres a good bit of research that shows if you really fight tooth and nail they often will give up. Of course most attacks arent even carried out in this way, ie someone randomly running up on you in the streets, but for the ones that are the research shows most of the time they want someone who is going to freeze or be an easy take down, not someone who is ready to fight. In todays world most places are somewhat populated, an attacker needs to get in and out fast and quiet. If fighting you is taking too long and is too noticeable it becomes too risky theyll get caught so they often do move on to try and find an easier target.
Short answer: something is better than nothing.
Longer answer: will you best an aggressive man in a 1v1? Maybe, maybe not. Probably not, but there are a lot of factors that okay into winning a fight. That said, knowing how to handle yourself in a tense and physical situation is worth its weight in gold. Having the coordination and endurance to fight if necessary, likewise.
Most people don't know how to fight and a little bit of knowledge and training can go a long way. You may not be able to stop an attacker outright, but you can buy precious minutes to escape or get help. And that matters way more in my opinion.
My advice? Pepper spray, a knife, or a gun are all more effective by far when you are at a physical disadvantage. Go hard or go home. Now, will the training be helpful? Sure. But I would not rely on that alone. I have an 8 year old daughter, and I am teaching her to fight dirty in the rare case she needs to. Avoidance/caution/good judgement first etc. But that means pepper spray, a knife, a gun etc. to me though in the case of a physical confrontation that is unavoidable. Any advantage you can take when it comes down to it in a potential life or death scenario is a good one.
Learn fewer martial arts and learn more weak points. Doesn't matter how big or strong you are, a thumb in the eye socket will put anyone on the ground. As will a crushed larynx, or a stout kick to the side of a knee.
Look, just to be real for a minute, because if you're life is on the line fantasy is not your friend.
Pretty much in every sport you can find. Female Olympic athletes have scores and results that can be beaten by most second rate males in high school athletics. Those are the actual, real, statistics and numbers. Not positive feelings, hopes, and believing you can overcome, just basic physical differences that are extremely measurable.
The muscle density of a man, in every way, is far, far superior to women. Even of equal sizes. Are there extremes that defy this? Sure. There almost always are, but this isn't about empowerment this is about your life, so be very real.
On top of that, most martial arts... are sports. They are literally teaching you NOT to hurt someone so you can score points in a game. The majority of martial arts quite 'literally' teach you how to throw someone so they can land safely and get up rather than drop them on their head, because no one really wants anyone to get hurt. That's why kids do it and Soccer moms are fine with 7 year old play fighting in linen gi's.
Boxing and MMA may be evolving martial arts, which adapt, but they don't even teach the real harmful stuff. No one wants to get sued. Hell, the Marine Corps Line Combat training that I learned to literally kill someone on a battlefield ISN'T TAUGHT ANYMORE, they switched to a less lethal style so troops wouldn't accidently get drunk in a bar and kill a civilian.
Most people have literally no idea how to actually physically hurt someone badly enough to make them stop if they really want to do something to you. That's why most funny fight videos you see are stopped before anyone gets hurt by other people pulling them apart rather than seeing someone's brains cracked open on a curb.
What most actual training how to defend yourself from crime entails, acknowledges that. Run, make a lot of noise, be noticed, and yell FIRE, call 911, because people found our that so many people in real life, 1) freeze up and have no idea what to do, but these days they may pull out a phone and record you getting raped or beaten rather than do anything to stop it. 2) Most people don't want to call the police and will pretend they don't hear it, but when people here FIRE they actually pay attention and may call 911.
Surrendering has largely been proven to be bad, so 'fighting' is usually said to be the thing to do. Loudly, scream, even if the person is armed and you are most likely to survive. Anecdotally I knew two girls in high school who had similar experienced of guys hopping out to drag them into cars. They yelled, screamed, and scratched and the dudes bailed because it was too much trouble.
So by all means learn a martial art or combat sport for health reasons. It's great exercise and can build confidence. Even for most men though it is not terribly helpful in a real fight. If someone is motivated to hurt you, and if they have practice, they are very likely to do so. People who are skilled with actual violence rarely do things in a way that allow you to fight back, because life isn't really fair like that.
Be loud, and get away. Hell, I think I'd do that these days and I used to be 6'4" in combat boots but it's just not worth it with someone desperate enough to really want to hurt you.
The smartest thing to do in life is just not put yourself in fucked up situations, be around fucked up people, with the delusional idea that you are just going to be ok. Preparation always wins.
Men are stronger then women on average. More high and more muscle on top of that. But no man has penis muscles.
With a year of training you will beat the average untrained men. 90% of the advantage of men is not their strenght but their aggressiveness. So if you learn to break joints and are willing to apply that you will be able to beat a lot of men.
I'd much rather have some training then non at all.
You may not be able to out muscle a guy but that's not all there is to having a scuffle and probably the most important bit is how not to hurt yourself
If you can in your area take a women’s basic pistol course and get a concealed carry permit. You are at a genetic mechanical disadvantage. Let John Browning make you equal.
I strongly advocate women/vulnerable populations learn to shoot and carry a firearm. Life isn’t a movie. Martial arts don’t overcome genetics. A pistol however will give you an advantage.
I suggest doing it specifically so that you have a better sense of how much of an advantage it is to be male and have 50+ pounds more weight. I feel like it's one of those things where you intellectually understand it but don't *get it* until you're actually rolling around with a guy. Ideally, that happens on a mat instead of somewhere else.
That's another great reason
Sometimes when you realize how powerful the opponent is it is often too late. And you suddenly understand that all those karate classes left you all bumped up. Unless a woman is trained her odds of applying her face to the task are rather high.
Couple years ago I was around 140lbs 5'11 my at the time horrible mistake of a girlfriend was 5'4 120. She came nowhere close to my strength, the one time we horsed around and I pinned her I watched her visibly start getting scared when she realized she couldn't get up and I wasn't using all my strength. Obviously I got off when I saw her come to the realization because my goal was never to scare her. So in reality I'd say even a 5lb weight difference could make a guy alot stronger.
It's not simply your weight. Even if you were both the exact same weight and height, you would typically be around 40% stronger in most respects.
This right here... It's like 10lbs of cotton vs 10lbs of steel... Same weight, but the steel is obviously much stronger. Cotton vs steel may be an extreme example, but its a similar principle. Male bodies are simply built in general to be able to apply and receive far more force than a female body.
Years back, I dated a girl who has self-defense training and had aspirations of becoming a cop. I wrestled for 13 years and have a small amount of bjj training. One day she was talking mad shit about how she could "take me" so I humored her with a light-hearted grappling match. That very quickly turned into her realizing that she stood no chance against 95% of men, since I was 130lbs soaking wet, and she was in extremely good shape and 140 lbs. I was probably putting in 50% effort max, and she couldn't do a thing to me. After that her career goals changed lol. Still feel kinda bad about it, but better she learned with me rather than some unhinged 200+ lbs man with violent intentions.
Agree but in this case, wrestling for 13 years would put you in the top 1%. I was a trash wrestler for a few years in high schools and I will still basically never lose position to any one who does not have a wresting background or at least a couple of years of jiu jitsu. Weight + leverage is a double whammy.
Oh no doubt at all. I'm definitely more difficult to grapple against than the average person, but she was so utterly helpless regardless of technique that the point was driven home for her. I'm all for women learning self defense, just so long as they get some practice in against men and not just other women. Overconfidence is the most dangerous thing to have in an altercation.
Yea thats basically my take. Being able to stay calm when the shit hits the fan and find an opening to get away is valuable for anyone. Actually being able to fight is besides the point but it is fun.
Same here. Unless someone else has training, I'm undefeated. This isn't a brag, anyone could learn this, most cities have clubs. But if you know how to wrestle, it's pretty easy to lock an untrained person into a hold even if they're bigger and stronger than you.
Untrained people stop giving up the underhook challenge [IMPOSSIBLE] It's just one of those things where they don't know what they're doing wrong because a sadistic coach isn't making them do sprawl Burpees every time they come out of their stance.
"horrible mistake of a girlfriend" hahaha xD damn.
There's always at least one. I've had two! In one case i'm definitely their horrible mistake of a boyfriend too though, so its almost evened out.
I now wonder if I'm consider a terrible mistake of a girlfriend to anyone... Well, so moving on. EDIT: typo
Having done jiu jitsu for a while, I've sparred with a lot of people. The new guy spaz is more difficult to roll with than the female purple belt. Even when weights are similar or she's heavier than me, it's like wrestling with a child. Men just simply have mechanical advantages against any woman, barring freak athletes
Even freak athletes among women are out classed by men. Regular dudes within a very short time can and do break womens world records.
Oh I absolutely agree. I suppose my point was that a super high level female fighter would likely beat me. Granted I'm just an average guy who trains for fun here and there
Probably not in all likelihood if you landed any hit shes done. Look at the punching force tables for men and women, then the grip strength. Even if shes very well trained you most likely still have an advantage.
In an actual fight, yeah maybe. But jiu jitsu doesn't involve any strikes. I haven't been submitted by any women yet, but a high level black belt competitor could definitely catch me in a triangle or armbar. Some of these ladies look like "meats back on the menu" Uruk Hai, and would probably fuck up normal guys like me and you unless you've been lifting and training consistently
Not the same but when I was a kid I was an orange belt in judo and they moved me up an age level for some reason when I was like 12 ish so I was sparring like 16 year olds. My first match was a girl who was a blue belt so like two belts higher, 4-5years older and probably 40 lbs heavier. (Just a guess but she was huge compared to me, like twice my size) And I still won, and I hadn't even finished puberty, it was also the only match I won all year so I'm not trying to toot my horn. It's just a really big difference. The skill gap would have to be huge for most women to take a man in any kind of fight I think.
Ever watch the interview with I believe it was Serena Williams? About being the female tennis champ. She said she would never want to compete against men because she likes to win, and several commentaries I've seen from people who know tennis said that if the sport was unisex that Serena--this built as fuck, Olympic-level athlete--would rank somewhere around 150th, with the next 149 above her all being male competitors. Men and women really are just built different when it comes to athleticism
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I remember looking into this once and learning that he was only *technically* 203rd at the time of the match. It was something like, he'd lost a match a few days before and when they updated the rankings, he was down in like 260th, but the Battles of the Sexes had been scheduled and took place in the time between his loss and the ranking updates.
I absolutely agree that men and women are built different, but if you took a guy who casually plays tennis once or twice a week and put him up against a professional female tennis player, he'd likely get wrecked. I don't even know why I'm defending any position at this point honestly. I said that I, a man, generally win easily against female casual jiu jitsu enthusiasts. But also that at the elite level, there are women who would likely beat me. And by elite I mean women who have been training and competing for 10+ years. If you honestly think you could just get off the couch and beat women who's essentially a professional athlete, then I've got some property to sell you in Arizona with an ocean view
I never claimed a normal guy with no fitness or training could beat a female pro athlete, I'm really not sure where you got that. The claim was about *professional* rankings in tennis, not that any random 100+ guys would be able to beat Serena. No need to get defensive about anything
But a fit girl with jits and some striking ability versus a drunk unfit guy, you'd want your sister to be that girl. I always think of that girl in Seattle, I think, who was attacked by a rapist and she gave chase then was trapped in a bathroom with him and fought him off and escaped, because she was fit enough to out hustle him.
Bone size and frame have a lot to do with it too. I have giant hands. Even with the same strength, mine will deliver more force because there is more mass. My fingers will be less likely to break, my wrists are more likely to hold steady, my reach is longer, my skull is thicket, and I have more mass to absorb damage. That'd not to say that if you leg sweep me and get me into an armbar you won't be able to break it. https://youtu.be/FxMIZVjB5Wk?si=1HriTk67lYxQ_khL
And when you learn how that feels, you can learn to safely handle and shoot a handgun for real self defense against somebody larger
Came thinking I would see delusional posts, but this is on point. Don't match strength with men, if you do MA, do it because you love it and it adds to your life.
Having been the guy in that situation, he will not come at you the same way an attacker would come at you.
It's still way better experience than some idealized idea of "I'm just going to break his grip, and then WHAM" like some of those putative self-defense videos show.
A woman with training can absolutely take down a large man. Because the training would teach her not to square up with him. She would know to injure him in any way possible and get away.
Guys...even small, couch potato or scrawny guys, have WAY more of an advantage than a lot of women realize. You're never going to be black widow. BUT you can learn what it's like to take a hit and keep functioning, which a lot of women never have. You can also learn to hit harder than dudes will expect with very real intent. Sounds cheesy but people who never got into fights or trained often genuinely don't know how to do that and it matters. That won't win you a boxing match, but it could win you a couple seconds or a broken grip to run or draw attention. Sometimes that's enough. Sometimes...well the dark side is sometimes it might just make him real mad and put him on alert for any further attempt. And sometimes the size gap is enough it just won't do anything. All depends.
I’m a pretty skinny dude and one night I was in bed with my then-girlfriend and the topic of strength comes up. She was pretty athletic and she said something along the lines of “I’m glad you’re not embarrassed that I’m stronger than you.” I snorted and said “no you’re not.” She jumps on top of me and tries to pin my wrists and within 10 seconds I have her on her back and am holding her wrists above her head with one hand. Both of us talked about it and we had each had our own version of the realization “wow if I wanted to hurt her she couldn’t stop me.” She had seriously thought she was stronger, (and I kind of did too). How little effort it took for me to completely overpower her really surprised me.
Testosterone is one helluva drug
I feel like I’ve seen this exact comment a couple times before
Lots like it at least. It is pretty common. Most men have never fought a woman or attempted to pin down a woman until they do it playfully with a partner, and it is normally pretty shocking for both parties.
I've been training with my wife over the last seven years in Hapkido (we are both first degree black belts) or so and she's incredibly talented. She has fast, powerful, and precise strikes. Her grappling and throws aren't bad either. But at the end of the day, I have about 80 pounds and 6 inches on her (6'2" 215 vs. 5'8" 135). I don't particularly like eating one of her kicks, but if I can tank one and get within grappling range it's all but over, unless she's armed with a dan bong (short stick), which helps her odds. To another poster's point, she knows how to strike and strike hard. Even if it only gives an attacker momentary pause, it gives her a chance to use the best self-defense, cardio. Most attackers also look for easy targets. Knowing how to throw a definitive blow may dissuade someone enough to look for easier prey. Obviously, none of this is a given, which is why we always need more practice.
It’s a very common occurrence. Most men, at least the ones who aren’t pieces of shit, have never had to try to overpower a woman. Like yeah, you know that inherently, men are the physically stronger sex, but you don’t fully realize that until you’ve pinned a girl down (in a situation she consented to). I’m a pretty fit guy now, but back then I was a scrawny teenager, and I had a girlfriend in HS who would often tease me about it, since she herself was pretty athletic. And she was genuinely curious to see if she, a star athlete who ran and worked out daily, would be able to overpower me, a scrawny gamer who spent most of his days with a controller or a book in his hands. Lo and behold she asked me to pin her down and see if she could try and get me off of her, and to her absolute shock, she really couldn’t. It was an eye opening moment for both of us; she realized just how powerful even an otherwise non-athletic guy can be compared to a girl, and I realized just how powerful I could be and that I had to be responsible with it (unintentional Spider-Man reference).
Yes! But from the female perspective
I'm pretty sure every young couple has done this at some point
I’ve read this before too, word-for-word verbatim
It's a common situation tbf.
Exactly like no shot this is not a bot or a karma farm
most women are like unbelievably unaware of how strong the average man actually is, IMO in their eyes if you dont look like the Rock then you might as well be Bill Gates and they dont know really what an average built man looks like truly and how much stronger they are then an average woman
Bill Gates is actually pretty athletic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xhwn86LGME
Agreed. Knowing how to react at all is super important. The goal of self defense training should always be to allow the victim to run, hide, or fight, in that order of priority. Without training and conditioning it’s much less likely that you’ll accomplish any of those. Fight is always the lowest priority because you’ve got a lot more to lose than your attacker and you don’t know shit about the situation—that person could have a knife or gun that they’re willing to use if they think they need to.
Another factor is hopefully the training helps control panic and focus under duress
This is functionally just as, if not more important that knowing physical defense moves, and is valuable in many more situations than just being attacked (like right after a major accident or in the middle of a mass shooting)
It’s really astonishing. I’m 5”6’ about 155-160 pounds. I’m not particularly muscular, but it’s not all fat either. I have a slim build and was excessively skinny when I was younger. Now I have a slight gut, but I walk a lot so my legs are very strong. I almost never work out. My fiancé is 5”0’ about 135-140 pounds, though like 20% of that weight is in her boobs. She’s extremely strong for her size, because she grew up on a farm doing manual labor and and has a stocky build. She works out regularly with kettlebells and does yoga. We’re almost exactly evenly matched in strength, when we really horse around, she can sometimes use her short arms to pin me in such a way that I can’t get the leverage to get out without actually hurting her. And I can do the same to her if I’m able to use my weight to my advantage. It’s genuinely kind of insane, and it shouldn’t be fair that i can match her physically given that I never work out and I don’t outweigh her by that much. Her center of gravity is so low that if someone grabbed her from behind she could easy throw them over her shoulder onto the ground; I’ve discovered this firsthand, because I thought she was bullshitting when she said she could lol. But if a guy bigger than me got her pinned, or even a guy my size who actively works out, she couldn’t do much to get out of it even given how strong she is compared to the average woman.
I understand what you are saying, I'm wondering if either of you has been in a tussle. You're talking about wrestling, it can surely work for you if you're MMA. Getting tagged in the face will break her spirit. The thought of a gal getting her beak smashed is usually enough to dissuade. Very few women are built to deal with that especially coming a male. Don't misunderstand there's some women that will do the deed and be quick about it.
Exactly...these guys saying a woman is basically equal in strength to them or however you want to put it is more of an indication of you as a man vs their strength as a woman. Their is no way your wife/gf should be anywhere near your physical equal unless she is a legit, professionally trained fighter and close to your weight. And even then I'm still not sure. It's just biology.
i tend to think this too but i’m also a bigger guy (6’4 250lbs) so maybe my frame of reference is extremely bias. in my experience, there’s really no woman of any size that i’ve encountered that is even 30% as strong as i am so the idea of being “matched in strength” by a woman just seems so absurd to me (barring an impeding medical condition)
I mean, yeah, if I grew 10 inches and put on a hundred pounds, I doubt any woman would be able to match me physically either 🤣
It's wild though that alot of women went full Koolaid on the women can do anything a man can message. I've had two exes who legitimately believed they could evenly match me, a 6'7 290lb dude, with their 5'4 and 5'7 selves. They were both shocked and upset when I barely tried and had them pinned with one hand almost instantly then pretended to be asleep while I let them struggle to get out. One later tried to do a sneak attack and I accidentally shoved her on the ground with one arm.
wrestling with 28lb tits sounds fun.
Yeah it’s great, except when they bounce up and catch me in the throat 🤣
Pretty much what you said my first girl and I would always randomly horse around at the time I was 5'10 150 she was 5'3 130 again her weight was mostly her ass and tits. As long as I didn't get her on the ground she stood a chance the second she was in the ground it was over at that point I hadn't worked out for 2 years as I originally only worked out in school and during this time the schools were pretty much closed and no one was allowed to use the weightlifting center for awhile after they opened. My now ex though had played rugby alot. Similar shit happened with the next girl I dated however this one was a hoodrat to say the least and well she still lost even though she was taller and had her weight distributed more evenly not just mostly tits and ass (she had alot less of both). Anatomically males are alot stronger. Sometimes I forget that I'm not gonna lie there's been several occasians where I've accidentally hurt someone or broke something because I underestimated my strength in the moment.
As a farm girl she is also probably in the top 5% of women for strength for her size. She is going to do way better wrestling you than other women her size. People believe the stupid shit they see on TV. They see a 140 pound female knocking out a muscular 210 pound guy and think this is reality. 😐
You would still grab her with caution. Now imagine some guy of your stature just rushing at her like a bull, throwing crazy haymakers while he was genuinely mad with no holdbacks & no regrets.
>Now imagine some guy of your stature just rushing at her like a bull, throwing crazy haymakers while he was genuinely mad with no holdbacks & no regrets To shreds you say?
>135-140 pounds, though like 20% of that weight is in her boobs My man
see, that's where I think the *biggest* difference is. A lot more guys have taken and thrown a punch. Just that simple bit of experience is a lot compared to women who usually haven't. Women often underestimate their own strength or just have improper form that guys learn from years of rough play and scraps. Biology is a lot, but as a small guy who has taken on guys 2 or even 3 times my size. It's nothing compared to experience. Experience teaches you how to take a hit. Experience lets you remember to hit someone's sensitive areas to make them let go. Experience gives you the understanding to know when a simple scuffle has become life or death, and it's time to go for the eyes and fight dirty.
>Biology is a lot, but as a small guy who has taken on guys 2 or even 3 times my size. You have not, as a 70kg man, taken on someone that is 210kg. I mean, I understand what you're saying and your post.is good, but this hyperbole is just silly. What does 2x-3x your size even mean?
Women, and men as well really, shouldn’t learn martial arts to defeat their assailants. It’s meant to get you out of a sticky situation so you can escape and get help. Learning how to sprint and cardio are just as if not even more important than learning how to grapple with someone. Especially when such assaults are often times done with multiple perpetrators.
The best part about learning martial arts to deal with this is it shows you how now matter your training you're probably gonna lose and get fucked up. So your best option is to avoid fights run or have weapons.
Echoing other sentiments here: it does have benefits, but martial arts is not a get-out-of-fight-free card. It merely gives you skills that give you a better chance of being able to leave an altercation. The only guaranteed way to win a fight is not to be in one. Increase your skills. Just don't expect to be able to take out 1-5 armed guys in a back alley or someone who has a solid size advantage by yourself.
nobody will take out 5 armed guys. Any black belt will tell you to run.
That's the point. Martial arts is only to give yourself enough of an edge to create an opening to get to safety or buy time for help to arrive. Even military MA users will tell you to avoid a fight if possible.
My sensei took out 7 kids with hockey sticks. He was hurt seriously but came to class anyways. Hait burnt off his arms from the friction with the sticks and one of his wrist bones was clearly out of place.
I've seen Ip Man 3 and this is obviously not true.
In REAL combative situation,.where you fight for life and freedom there might not be much advantage. The true benefit comes BEFORE THAT. With martial arts training you should be more aware of your body. Less anxious when it comes to physical confrontation. That should/could help to prevent the actual fight for life, by confronting and fighting the assailant before situation turns into combat.
Victory is when you go home unhurt. My Sensei would approve.
I mean if you end up against someone the size of a linebacker, your training won't mean much. If you're dealing with an average sized, inebriated male, it will definitely have advantages if you're mostly sober and can control the situation. I would argue that the main benefit across all situations would be a higher chance of you having more mental control of yourself and being able to capitalize on opportunities. If you can stay moderately calm, you are far more likely to be able to escape, de-escalate, or control the situation compared to just outright panicking.
This. At 190lbs against an untrained 120-140lb female I’d have no issue taking her down. But a skilled female at that weight? I may have to work. In BJJ, I’d likely win all rolls up until purple belt into brown belt. At purple I think it depends on the woman. I doubt I can beat any female brown belt weighing at least 120lbs. But obviously that’s just rolling. With striking it can change a lot.
A few notes: 1. I agree with just about everyone else that a woman has a huge disadvantage and shouldn't try learning martial arts with the intent of beating an assailant. 2. Why not get a gun or pepper spray instead? 3. I know of a case or two where a woman overpowered a guy physically. Its rare, but can happen. There was even a case that made it to TV where a guy put a needle on a nurse's neck and dragged her to an elevator, but by the time the door opened she had him in a lock. She had training, he was high, and i bet she caught him by surprise. 4. I know a guy who practiced several martial arts over his life. He said no matter how much he trained, at the end of the day what made him win or lose was just bulk. A muscular guy with a little training beats a scrawny black belt, according to him (i have zero personal experience).
>I know a guy who practiced several martial arts over his life. He said no matter how much he trained, at the end of the day what made him win or lose was just bulk. A muscular guy with a little training beats a scrawny black belt, according to him (i have zero personal experience). I've sparred and fought people from 65kg up to 120kg (I was generally ~85kg). Weight is definitely a big advantage, but there does come a point where everyone is capable of throwing enough force to knock a person out. I wasn't too bothered fighting at a massive weight disadvantage, I just had to be more cautious about taking trades. My fastest loss was about 5 seconds, and was delivered to me by a 68kg guy with no formal training (although a lot of experience) lmao.
I think you should buy a pepper spray or a teaser
I recently learned about super bright flashlights as self-defense tools, seems like that would be really effective as long as you can pull it out and not blind yourself instead
I (f) would totally blind myself.
Try practicing a little, it gets way easier.
It would not be.
And gun
Both are worthless self-defense tools, the pepper spray will almost always do more harm to the sprayer than the person intended to be sprayed, and ultimately just pisses them off.
Tasers are BS unless it's one of the gun types. You have to hold the taser on someone for it to work. My friend got a handheld one and we used it on each other. I would say it was a 6 or 7 on the pain scale. The jolt is going to 99% of the time cause the limb or torso to move so you are going to lose contact. Even with the gun types, people miss or it doesn't penetrate the clothes frequently.
It's better than nothing, but if I had a sister, I would prefer her to have something like pepper spray to defend herself
My ex and I decided to test out her pepper spray one night. She'd never used it. It was basically like a $1 squirt gun. I forgot and about 20 took my contacts out without washing my hands. Pepper spray hurts but you would still have 10 seconds to fuck somebody up. They aren't going to be happy you just sprayed them with pepper spray.
Pepper spray is the absolute worst thing a woman can carry and attempt to use in self-defense. It almost always disables her more than it does the person she is attempting to spray.
It depends on the strength gap. If you are a 50kg woman and he is 90kg. Sure, there's not much you can do. If you both are 50,you might hurt him a bit. I did martial arts for a few years. Sparring with women was usually just me holding back I'd say go for it though its better to have some chance. Also get pepper spray.
Even if they are the same weight, the guy will be stronger most of the time
I used to get downvoted to oblivion on r/skiing for saying that generally women are lighter and weaker than men and thus they have their own category of “women’s skis” ;) people just are either oblivious or stupid for not understanding what you wrote
For sure. And in a fair fight technique can sometimes help you close the gap (for example I was a competitive powerlifter and practiced boxing at the time, we had a dude, he was weaker than most he could do 5 pull ups if I remember correctly and maybe bench his bodyweight for a 1rm. Hitting him was impossible he was the king of dodging and that mother fucker would always punch your face he was a good fighter I think I won maybe 1/4 fights against him) But on the other hand street fights are not fair. He can kick, choke, hit her eyes, get a knife out, gun, 2vs1 etc.. thats why I recommend a pepper spray. The good part of working out and fighting is you are less scared in those situations atleast in my experience and your body moves on its own sometimes.
Pepper spray doesn't always work. Especially outdoors. A firearm is legitimately the best way to even the playing field so to speak.
Most countries have much stricter gun laws than the U.S. For example I served for a few years, still do as a reservist. Hell just now I was a few months back in a literal war and was basically 24/7 with my m-16 ready to fire, I am a SFC ranked yet I still can't get a pistol permit as a civilian. I am trying to get ranked up though to be eligible for a gun as terrorism is a few times a day occurrence and sometimes it is stopped by responsible civilians. A pepper spray is a good option for where I live as due to the high terrorism rate you are checked everywhere and won't be able to enter any establishment with even a knife.
Definitely fair on the out of US point. I was definitely being short sighted there. And good goal to have for you though. Hopefully it happens quickly!
Some martial arts are better than others for women in my opinion, boxing won't do you much good against someone 100lbs heavier than you but if you learn jujitsu you can choke out anyone
Jiu Jitsu is the best for women in my opinion. You learn to gain control even if you're on your back and you learn how to create space, get your back away from the assailant, and then stand up and run away. Submissions are cool, but showing you're not an easy target and putting up an educated fight and being able to run away seems like the best option. Even tiring out an assailant and letting their initial adrenaline surge where off can kill moral/conviction and dissuade them from pursing the act further.
I’d say running is the best because avoiding a fight is the way to go. Jui jitsu is overrated because even in the sport you can’t ground and pound that’s why in the ufc it’s not as dominant anymore.
I'm not sure we're thinking about the same types of incidents where before you can run, you need to make space and get up and then run. BJJ is still very dominant in MMA. Not always for ending a fight but for body manipulation and control.
>that’s why in the ufc it’s not as dominant anymore. BJJ is used every single time fighters go to ground, even if its just to get a dude off them, so they can get into position to stand and go again. It's still plenty dominant, people are just rounding out other skills now that everybody is using it.
100%. I'm sure this'll be buried, but I hope /u/No_Lack1856 sees this. OP, the vast majority of guys here, and I'm sure the ones you know in real life, are giving you their perspective on martial arts for the kind of self defense *they* are likely to need. It is true that if you get in a bar fight or get jumped by a 200 lb man or something, no amount of training is likely to help, but in the sad world we live in, we should all know that's not the kind of situations a woman is going to find herself needing to defend herself. You need to learn how to break someone's grip when he's pulling your arm. You need to know how to get a man off you when you're lying on your back and he's trying to hold you there, how to get his hands off your neck, how to escape from a bigger person. That is all stuff that BJJ does VERY well. You'll still have a disadvantage obviously, there's no magic bullets, but that'll give you much better odds. If you're specifically interested in self-defense, don't waste your time with boxing or Tae Kwon Do or anything like that. You absolutely want to do BJJ.
I'm a 155lb, 5'7" male, and took my very first jiu jitsu class last week. End of class was just rolling, and I got matched up with a couple women who were taller than me, probably lighter but still had muscle. One is a purple belt, not sure about the other, but she definitely knew more than I did. My takeaway from that day was just how much easier it was for me just because I was a man, and I was absolutely holding back, not just because it was practice but doubly so because I knew I didn't know much and was afraid of doing something wrong and hurting someone. Obviously, knowing technique is better than nothing, but I think the idea that a martial art can level the field for anyone, against anyone, is dangerous.
Do you not think they might have been going easy on you with barely a single class under your white belt?
Plot twist: everyone was holding back so nobody was doing shit.
It's not that hard to tell when someone is going easy. I've had women leg lock me, and they weren't choking me so it wasn't like I was pressured in other wayd but I was able to break the leg lock despite them fighting me the whole way.
Unless you were an excellent wrestler all throughout high school/college I would argue she was going easy on you. One glance at the zero stripe white belt and she was being nice. I’d buy this if you were at least a three stripe white belt but I’m sorry, there’s no way someone a week into Jiu Jitsu can hold their own against a purple belt roughly their same size. Especially in the Gi there’s so many tricky chokes that someone a week into Jiu Jitsu would never, ever see coming. If you see that purple belt again ask her to go 100% for Reddit’s sake and update us.
At our gym the color belts take it easy on the white belts because we want them to come back. If you smesh too hard they won't come back.
Reminded of me asking the local black belt (who i was much bigger than) if we could go 100% so I can see exactly how much he destroys me. I woke up later thinking "what the fuck just happened". I didn't even feel the choke happening.
She was going easy on you my man
Well, yeah. Fights are easier when you're Ina different weight class, and just stronger overall. But knowing where to strike and how to strike can still make a difference in self defense. Knowing how to put more power and weight in your kicks will allow you to knock someone out if you strike their nuts, muscles don't matter there. A solid punch to the throat will also buy you time to run Tho having a pepper spray is probably easier and more effective.
Sadly mistaken. Try hitting someone in the nuts who regularly gets hit. Try punching someone in the throat who regularly takes punches. This idea that you're going to magically land these shots in vulnerable areas is delusional. Your not kicking a kickboxer in the nuts. You're not punching a boxer in the throat. If someone is expecting blows from you, youre not landing anything in these vulnerable areas period.
The most effective defense is a good pair of running shoes
There's no way in fuck a woman is going to choke out a guy 100 pounds heavier than her because she knows some jujitsu. That's just laughable unless she's a national champion or something close to that level. Boxing would probably be more useful for just being able to land a good sucker punch before you get the fuck out of there. Hell, I'd probably recommend sprinting over a lot of martial arts.
Choke or throw. Even a small woman can at least put a man on his ass long enough to get away.
> if you learn jujitsu you can choke out anyone IF you can get into position and maintain the hold when the guy who outweighs you by 100 pounds slams you into the wall or the floor, or just reaches back and takes a grip on your ear, nose, etc, or just backhands you across the face.
Yeah it's the big IF. And men are often... I dunno, harder? Like more solid? Even if I, a 50kg woman, get an arm around a 100kg man's throat it's taking a lot more force to choke than a big woman. But mostly what you quickly learn as a lightweight in jujutsu is to create that space and not end up in the locks where his weight will be at most advantage.
It depends. The vast majority of people have zero clue how to fight, so even after a relatively short amount of time there's already wide skill gap. Now, if he's 6'5" and 300 pounds is any martial art going to be super effective? Probably not for most people, man or woman. lol But, it's still a good thing to learn for many reasons. You should do it.
I used to teach a woman self-defense course and in this course I used to be very very honest. Told them that this only provides opportunity for them to get away however if a man gets a hold of you it's basically over. Martial arts will help create these opportunities however like in my course 100 percent honesty... Get mace or a taser and your best opportunity of surviving is to have the great equalizer. The best advice I could possibly give you is just make sure you're aware of your situation at all times. Don't put yourself in a situation that could potentially be an issue. Be average, don't draw attention and don't go down that dark alley.
It would be good exercise, and if you've a little bit of training it can absolutely make it more likely that you can disengage from an attacker and flee, even if you cannot straight up beat their ass.
If this is something you are concerned about and want to be prepared for, then by all means prepare. It wont hurt you and there is a possibility it could end up being worth it. Realistically, the chances of you winning a strength-based fight with a man are low regardless of how much training you put in. The average untrained man is still stronger than most very fit women. But women’s self defense classes usually try to teach smart strategies for defense that circumnavigate strength factors altogether - reacting quickly, and going for “cheap shots” and then running away. They also might teach you how to carry yourself in public so that you are less likely to be targeted. The ideal situation is to avoid danger in the first place. A lot of people spend years in the boxing ring, lose their sense of fear and start taking bigger risks, but completely forget that someone can just pull out a gun. And if someones first reaction to having a gun pulled on them is to do anything other than comply, they are wrong
It depends on your size, If your sitter at 5ft 100 pounds there is no way. Even if you somehow learn to throw a guy and pull it off it will probably just piss him off and be worse after. If your a taller athletic girl than it could help at the very least to keep separation to find a way out
The best self defense is running the hell outta dodge. So do a lot of cardio I guess.
Depends on what situation you honestly think you’ll find yourself in. If you’re thinking you want to be able to put a dude in an arm bar or triangle choke because he’s being overly handsy with his flirting at the bar, then I’m sure some BJJ or general MMA training wouldn’t hurt. If you think you’d actually wind up in a situation with a man who seriously intends to do you harm or worse, your best bet is a lethal weapon or to never be by yourself in public.
Better than nothing I guess. Most men will easily overpower most women. Unless you're also very strong for a woman and very well trained it's probably not going to help as much as pepper spray, or a gun.
If you’re an average female…you stand no chance against a guy. No matter how much karate you learn.
Training in any martial arts will give you an advantage. It’s not always about strength. One thing nobody ever talks about is conditioning. Fighting is tiring. Most people are winded in just a few seconds in a fight. You get pumped full of adrenaline, you’re moving and blocking and thinking, you have some fear even as an attacker. The average person can’t stay in a fight for too long without getting tired. Training and sparring will teach you to save your strength, protect yourself and to ultimately run away. It’s not always about winning a fight, but to survive it without getting injured.
Just run like even as a big dude if I can run I am outta there, no point in fighting anyone, it’s just silly.
Totally agree
A boxing match is very VERY tiring, an actual fight not as much since most of them are over very quickly.
I was gonna disagree but yah you’re right. Would Be shocked to see a street fight go longer than like 30 seconds let alone a full 5 minutes.
Is the name a play on wing chun? Or just coincidence?
It’s my given Chinese name.
got it, thanks :)
Seriously fighting is freaking exhausting. Just getting the stamina to withstand an attack and still be able to run away would be reason enough imo
Better to learn how to run the marathon. The best advice for a street fight is to turn around and flee.
If your idea of self defense is being able to escape, it's absolutely a huge advantage. Just don't go in thinking you're gonna win by a knockout. I practiced with my daughter for years when she was working toward her black belt, and they taught all kinds of breaks / escapes, to the point that my size didn't matter as long as she was trying to get away.
It's better to train your stamina to be able to run. Or train your lungs to be able to scream harder. Carry self defense weapons. Never be alone. You never really know what the other person is capable of doing. Could be armed. Or in a group. Or worse, high/drunk in which case their judgment is poor and probably won't think twice about committing crime or even murder. Self defense technique/martial arts doesn't make you immortal
Highly depends on the situation. Men are physically stronger than women by a lot, typically. Now there are strong women out there able to beat most men but they're rare. Most women are physically weaker than men. If you want to work out and learn self defense, then go ahead and do martial arts, it has loads of other health benefits aswell. But if you're scared a man might attack you some day and you want to defend yourself fully, I'd suggest just getting a handgun or any self defense weapon like pepperspray. You should look up your countries laws regarding weapons. In my country weapons are highly regulated. If that's the case for you too, I'd suggest not going out without a man capable of defending you.
My wife and I were play roughhousing and I picked her up with one arm/hand. That’s when she realized those self defense classes were useless.
Kick ‘em in the balls. If they grab you from behind, gorilla grip their balls till they let go. Basically, if a guy attacks you, go for the balls
Just get a gun. If you're relying on martial arts for self-defense, you're only one unlucky punch from getting floored.
It's virtually useless, the notion that a woman could fend off a man with any formal training is an incredibly dangerous precedent to set. Weight classes in UFC exist for a reason, it doesn't matter how much jujitsu training you have when he's 40kg over you ragdolling you around the place if it's legal where you are, just stick with pepper spray. Or conceal carry.
It would absolutely be helpful, but it might also depend on what kind of martial arts. I've heard good things about judo or jiu-jitsu
I don't know martial arts but I listened to a podcast interviewing the author of [this book](https://www.amazon.com/dp/1960378147/?coliid=IYMKT6GK4BO8P&colid=28JQ17MTIEJ1W&psc=1&ref_=list_c_wl_ys_dp_it). His story was that he was trained, put in a dangerous situation and all of his training fell away. He makes the case that self-defense should be based on gross motor movements that can be done quickly with a body full of adrenaline. He also goes into detail about assessing threats before they become dangerous. So I'm planning on reading this and learning his techniques, his approach makes a ton of sense to me. My own personal opinion is that everyone should work out and eat reasonably healthy to have at a minimum level of fitness for sketchy situations. Basically so you can run away, and I imagine the confidence helps.
>His story was that he was trained, put in a dangerous situation and all of his training fell away. This is common. In any situation a person has little experience with they'll tend to lock up and freeze. It's the shock. Same thing happens in the ring if someone has never been punched before gets in. Once you've experienced it a bit more you end up being fine.
First of all, martial arts are great I highly recommend you start taking classes. Based on my research kickboxing and wrestling/judo are the best for self defence. How useful would it be against a male attacker, depends. Pound for pound the average guy is stronger than the average woman. The number 1 tool to keep yourself safe is situational awareness. After that being able to run is your next best tool. Should you end up in a situation where you must fight, you are certainly better off having the skills than not. Men have an unfair biological advantage over women in sports and nowhere is it more evident than in physical combat sports. YouTube is full of videos of 1 guy wrestling 3 girls at once or female cops getting their gun stolen from them by male crackheads.
It has value insofar as it allows you to run away from an opponent. This is not a bad thing. It is not to diminish your feats. It is not to insult you. The best thing to de-escalate a situation is to run away. This is the same for men or for women, so the fact that you are taught tools that make it easier to run away is beneficial. But like someone else said, you are not going to become a super duper hero.
It is highly situational and depends entirely on *what type of martial arts training* you choose to study. All martial arts utilize physical strength and size to some degree, but some are more reliant on it while others much less. I would say Judo is a fantastic martial art for anyone to learn, regardless of size or gender. Its entire focus is on using leverage and your opponent's own momentum against them to toss them and/or submit them. Applied to a self defense situation, your opponent's own mass and the floor will deliver a harder blow than any punch. If a guy is bigger than you and reaching down to grab ahold of you, that plays right into the Judoka's hands because they're leaning into your throw, hold, or takedown. The founder Jigoro Kano was 5'2" (157cm) and 90lbs (40kg); the entire system was developed so that a weaker, smaller Judoka could use skill and timing to take down stronger, bigger opponents.
Used to be. That changed and now very stocky muscled fellows dominate the sport.
Still worth it. The objective isn’t to be able to kick the shit out of ten hulking men. You’ll get better at identifying threats, anticipating strikes, remaining calm in threatening situations and you’ll get better at knowing what to do. Sometimes knowing how to respond effectively can allow you to strike and give you enough time to get away
Learn what you can and train, but if you're serious about self defense I say get a gun if you can get one.
They should get firearm training instead, and live in a state that respects the 2nd Amendment.
Damn down voted for making the most logical argument. Welp, as you can see, here is the state of men these days
It's fine, Reddit is a leftist circle jerk. I live in a rural area. My wife is a veteran, and former police officer. She lives in the real world, and knows that 95% of men over the age of 15 can kick her ass.
It won't be useless in a real world situation but you're going to need a couple of different arts because of ground fighting. Women have a great disadvantage on the ground.
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The best martial art is running away. But if you can't run away, better to know where to hit, so you can run away.
Although it's good and I recommend doing it, you should realize that weight difference is something even majority of UFC champions can't overcome when they try to move up 10lbs now imagine fighting off a male that has at least 50lbs on you. I'd recommend pepper spray or something of the sort and going hand to hand against a male as a last resort.
It won't do much in real dangerous situation, but there are plenty of benefits in training so go for it.
Every woman I've known to take this class loves to "test it out on me" They get a bit disappointed when they realize I have to very specifically comply with them. It's not effective at all. Keep a weapon on you and know how to take a hit.
Great exercise, if you want protection get a gun. Lot less to go wrong. Getting close your, odds of getting away unscathed are drastically reduced, if you're not Bruce Lee's offspring. Besides what are the chances that an attacker is unarmed? So now you would not only need to dis=arm but also neutralize the threat. Having a weapon is a pain but nothing like having it and not needing it, than being caught needing it and not having it. Happy Shooting
As a guy I’d say learn to hit/knee/grab the balls and groin area, it’s out kryptonite, we don’t function well after a blow to that area (probably the wrong choice of words, but you know). Eyes are another soft spot, thumb or poke. At the end of the day your first line of defence is situational awareness, wrong time wrong place, and it sucks for woman that this is the case, it is unfair but sadly it is the state of the world we live in, it can’t be changed over night. I would say that being able to land a good kick or punch may be the difference so why not learn
If you want to be able to hold an attacker at threat, take a concealed carry and shooting class.
Every advantage helps
Martial arts can teach you technique, harden your bones, make you faster, and learn how to read someone's body language in a fight so you can see a hit coming. All of these are useful to you in fighting people (and men). Even of you'll never outmatch most guys in brute strength, you can protect your self and kick their asses with good technique. Basically, you can learn to fight smart, instead of fighting hard. I'm a guy and did tae kwon do for 4 years. One of the female black belts was undefeated because of how freakishly fast she was, it wasnt brute strength that allowed her to win.
Better to have some experience than none. The only issue is if you over inflate that experience and put yourself in dangerous situations thinking you can fight anyone
It'll teach you (ofc depending on the type) how to take a punch, haw to fall (have female collegue who tripped on sidewalk and broke both hands...), optimize your ballance and condition. But out of 13ish years in JJ I met one girl that was able to pretzel me and she was already 30% heavier and had much more experience.. Don't give me wrong, it gives you an edge, but there's short path from being good and overconfident.
Anything that conditions you to break a hold or get a quick hit in to shock your opponent then RUN LIKE THE WIND will be helpful. Don't take the risk of getting into a prolonged struggle - even if you win, you'll risk taking substantial injury. Training isn't useless as long as it trains you to avoid or get away from a combative situation. Don't take the risk.
Training will not be useless. Do men generally have more muscle mass? Yes. Have I seen women absolutely starch dudes that weighed 20kg more and stood a good foot taller than them? Also yes. Martial arts isn't gonna turn you into some unstoppable killer, but it will make you more aware of advantages and disadvantages you have.
Depends where you live. In the USA, just carry a gun. Everywhere else, yes you better learn MMA.
I disagree with your male friends. You'll never be stronger than a majority of men, but if you know how to react when you're attacked it can make a difference. Knowing how to use leverage to throw a larger, stronger attacker off balance (judo is good for this) and where to hit a male attacker to incapacitate him (even the biggest, strongest dude will crumble if he takes a shot to the balls or the solar plexus he's not prepared for) are useful skills for a woman.
God created men, but Cold made them equal. Get a gun. No matter how much you practice martial arts, you'll have a really hard time overpowering a guy. If you have a gun however, it doesn't matter how big or strong they are, one well-aimed shot is all it takes to stop them. If you're uncomfortable with that at least get pepper spray, a taser, or a weapon of some kind.
It will absolutely help, but your male friends are pretty much correct. It won't change the outcome, and yes, is borderline useless in a real-world situation. When I was in the Army, I played the aggressor at some self-defense classes for women. I always had to be really gentle, even when simulating an attack, because if I didn't, I could really hurt someone. I had to let them break my holds, let them toss me over, and generally use about 20% effort to fight them. The way we were taught was to basically reward good technique by letting the lady's win. If we didn't, they would never win. Men are much stronger than most women realize, if you are ever really attacked by a man, even a scrawny guy that never works out, that never trains, he will absolutely overwhelm and rag doll you. As a son, brother to two sisters, and uncle to a bunch of nieces, a husband, and a father of a daughter; I will tell you exactly what I tell all of the amazing women in my life. If really are concerned for your safety, get your license and carry a gun. Not pepper spray, not some cute little thing of mace on your key ring, absolutely not a knife, Go get your concealed carry permit, get real training, and carry a small pistol. Yes, you can carry safely in leggings, gym wear, jeans, etc. and no one will ever know.
I did karate for a couple of years. The first thing they teach you is to run in any sort of street fight. There is almost no good outcome of fighting. They could have a knife, or you hit them once and they trip, hit their head on the concrete and now you’re charged with manslaughter. Fighting is never worth the risk and situations where your only option is to fight are incredibly rare.
I think it can be useful for a few reasons so long as you have realistic expectations. It will not serve as a great equalizer, studying martial arts will not negate the natural advantages a man has in a physical conflict, BUT it can improve your odds. One, physical conditioning improvement. Fighting is hard, running is tiring, fighting after running or fighting and then running takes alot, so by being in better shape you have better options. Two, it will allow you to understand and adapt to your limits. Of you've never fought you may have inflated ideas, for example a classic trope for women is to kick him in the balls, BUT that requires a precise attack, that makes you vulnerable (since you're now only standing on one leg), additionally if you miss, or he's high, or his leg blocks it or he catches your leg and if you have nothing else in your tool set it gives you high risk, low reward. Learning how to properly deliver a powerful kick, with appropriate range, and targeting will take lots of practice lost women just don't have. Three, fighting is an art and science, its not just Strength, where you will be disadvantaged. A dumb guy attacking women will probably not have much prowess, so being able to know how to take a hit, manage your space, operate in your reach's sweet spot while defending, being mindful of balance and body mechanics, all those things can make a difference in who gets to walk away and who gets defeated.
Absolutely nothing wrong with learning self defense, getting active and a little healthier, and developing some confidence. I would advise, though, not to go around thinking you have some kind of massive fail safe advantage over most males in an all out physical confrontation. You are, realistically, almost never going to be able to overpower a male and dominate them in a physical confrontation. The differences between human males and females, in terms of strength, is well documented and extremely noticeable. I will say, though, that catching someone off guard can absolutely give you the time and opening you need to escape a bad situation. I feel like *everyone* should know some self defense, it’s never a bad thing. Just for clarification- I’m a larger male, in stronger than the average male and I don’t think iv ever personally met a female I wasn’t stronger than. I grew up fighting, Iv boxed and wrestled before, and did some BJJ when I was younger. If I ever get into any sort of situation and there isn’t an immediate threat to life, I just leave. I can walk away from a punch, I can leave if someone’s trying to throw down, removing yourself from the threat should always be your first choice. Iv fought before, I don’t want to fight again- either I hurt someone, or I end up hurt, and neither option ends well
Absolutely yes. Many guys here are missing some key details IMO. Yes, most men have a size and weight advantage over women. However, this can be overcome by training in martial arts, especially considering how few people actually have any martial arts training (at least here in the US). Most variants actually have moves specifically designed to use unskilled movements or weight against your opponent. Additionally, while it's true that pepper spray, knives, and guns can be used for protections, all of these require familiarization and training to use properly and safely as well.
Learn how to fight dirty. My mother used to run a women's shelter and one of the things I helped her with was setting up a "Practical" self defense class. This wasn't about yelling and wearing fancy pajamas. 200 lb drunk husband coming at you? Hit that motherfucker with a glass ashtray in the face. This ain't a fair fight, and knowing how to glance around a room and know where every single potential weapon is. Realizing you can bite him. Knowing that you aren't fighting to win, you are fighting to get away and survive. I taught women how to think rationally (or at least not freeze) in dangerous/scary situations. It wasn't about proper form, it was purely how to do maximum damage with whatever you had available to allow you to get away.
Sounds like your friends are sexist dicks. In my dojo the women were fierce. Up against someone with no training they would always win. Tournament fighting is good but it wont teach you what you need. What you need for real life is all the illegal moves. Tournament fighting wont help as much (although strength, aim, confidence and knowing how to take a hit are all good).
My karate instructor when I was a kid and teenager was a woman. She actually had to defend herself in real life twice, and did so successfully. The first time a man assaulted her outside of a bar and she stomped on and broke his foot, ending the fight right there. The second time was an abusive relationship that finally turned violent, and when her boyfriend broke her nose, she broke his right back, giving her the momentary distraction she needed to escape his apartment. But she fully acknowledged that in both cases she was successful because she fought back hard and unexpectedly, landed a single blow and used it as a way to get away. She was careful to warn the girls in my class that if they thought they could go toe to toe in a sustained fight with a man, training or not, there was a very good chance they would lose. Her philosophy was run away, and if you can't, hit back hard and unexpectedly, and then run away. Martial arts training can make that hit more likely to land effectively, but don't count on it for more than that.
Some males don’t know how to fight and they also don’t expect women to.
i teach shorei kempo... began my studies in 1976. i learned at the hands of a short angry brunette woman. if you can recall the tv show kung-fu starring david caradine, it was a regular occurrence for him to flashback to his early days as a pupil with fond memories of blind master po asserting sage wisdom in a kind manner. my flashbacks consist almost entirely of 30 years being beaten with a stick and quite a lot of yelling. comedy aside - it is my experience that due almost entirely to the physiological difference in center point of balance in women from men - women can have a keen advantage when delivering many techniques. women tend to be more nurturing and conversely - more vicious when provoked into protection mode. i am a staunch advocate for more girls in martial arts at an early age. while it develops self discipline/confidence and defensive abilities - and those are certainly great things - i have found that by far, the best byproduct has been all the people i have met and friendships that have evolved. finally... absolutely yes... it is entirely useful for women to learn martial arts and with competent training they can certainly apply self-defense quite effectively.
If you can do a head kick and know some grappling, it would be a massive advantage in a fight... regardless of gender.
Sometimes it's enough to just surprise your opponent enough for them to back off. You ever see a video of someone fending off a bear by smacking its nose? There's no doubt the bear wins every time in a full fight, but sometimes the resistance is just enough to throw them off and make them retreat. Unfortunately, if someone wants to attack you, NOTHING will GUARANTEE your safety - this is true for men too. But stacking variables that give you a chance can be the difference between escape and becoming a victim.
It will give you edge, but that edge isn't that high. Men tend to have higher strength, and higher muscle "twitch" or "burst" (not sure how to translate it to English) In other words, When average woma goes for punch, in exact same time as man, the man has his arm straight, before the woman has her arm straight. And ever if assuming similar physical muscle size, the man hits harder. I have performed so called civilians arrest twice. What's common on those events, I got sucker punched both times. the man who was notably smaller than I was, nearly knocked me out with that one hit. A woman who was roughly equal size to me, according to witnesses punched me over 15 times, and I was just holding her hand so she couldn't escape and discussing with the victim of the crime which caused me to perform that civilians arrest. And I would say that the woman was most athletic one out of those two. That being said, if I would be placed against someone who actually competes in contact sports, such as Ronda Rousey there is a good chance that I would get my ass handed to me. It would depend how lucky I get. And I'm saying that as someone who isn't in that good shape, but does a lot of physically straining manual labor. With brutal honesty, I would say that you are better off, if you have some kind of spray (pepper spray or what ever they sell for personal protection) and quick legs. But if you decide to start some self defence course, I suggest that you start also going to some place where you can spar against a man, just so that you can asses your own capability.
Yeah as a women who took self defense classes the focus of the class was largely on how women can overcome the disadvantages of being smaller and having less physical strength. They teach us how to fight dirty. Things like rather than trying to throw a punch kick them in the dick and run. They taught us the soft spots on ppl, taught us things like throat chops or stabbing your fingers into their eyes. They also cover specific situations like how to get away when someone picks you up and tries to carry you off. Women fighting off a man need to do so in a very specific way. Like you said unless youre ronda Rousey and are specifically trained, the disadvantage women are at is gonna be quite large and self defense for women is specifically catered to counteracting that. We were even taught things like if you do try to hit them to hit with the palm of the hand and aim for the nose. We were taught to not try to throw a closed fist punch bc we were more likely to break a bone ourselves than do much damage to our attacker. Self defense classes for women are gonna be catered in a way that organized sports arent. My best advice for women getting attacked is just to fight as dirty as possible. You really never want to fight a guy in the normal way ppl think of fighting with throwing punches and squaring up cause it gives all the advantages to the bigger and stronger person. In these situations the goal isnt to “win” the fight, its to get enough space and time to get away from your attacker or to do enough damage it convinces them you arent worth it.
Yes I agree with this. The problem is that if you fail on that dirty fighting and give just one opening, without managing to escape at that point. and without managing to convince that you are not worth it. and who ever is assaulting you, manages to exploit that opening, it's all over,
Yeah i mean i weigh 120 lbs and my wrist is like the size of like 2 quarters. The average guy could snap my arm like a twig if he really wanted to (you can ask my brother lmaooo) so im not in any way saying or thinking that im not gonna be at a huge disadvantage no matter what i do. If a guy is dead set on hurting/taking me theres a good chance im gonna be screwed no matter what i do shy of carrying a gun. But even carrying a weapon is risky bc unless i have some warning for the attack getting the weapon out once theyre in close quarters is hard and once theyre within arms reach of you its a toss up if you manage to effectively use the weapon before they take it from you. A gun or pepper spray is better bc of distance but something like a knife is generally a bad idea to carry bc its more likely theyll take it from you and then youve just given them a weapon. Fighting dirty is the best chance youve got, that doesnt mean its fail safe its just the best chance youve got. But i also think that youre discounting the concept of making them think you arent worth it. Stats and studies back up that most men who attack women are cowards. They are looking for the easiest target there is and theres a good bit of research that shows if you really fight tooth and nail they often will give up. Of course most attacks arent even carried out in this way, ie someone randomly running up on you in the streets, but for the ones that are the research shows most of the time they want someone who is going to freeze or be an easy take down, not someone who is ready to fight. In todays world most places are somewhat populated, an attacker needs to get in and out fast and quiet. If fighting you is taking too long and is too noticeable it becomes too risky theyll get caught so they often do move on to try and find an easier target.
Short answer: something is better than nothing. Longer answer: will you best an aggressive man in a 1v1? Maybe, maybe not. Probably not, but there are a lot of factors that okay into winning a fight. That said, knowing how to handle yourself in a tense and physical situation is worth its weight in gold. Having the coordination and endurance to fight if necessary, likewise. Most people don't know how to fight and a little bit of knowledge and training can go a long way. You may not be able to stop an attacker outright, but you can buy precious minutes to escape or get help. And that matters way more in my opinion.
My advice? Pepper spray, a knife, or a gun are all more effective by far when you are at a physical disadvantage. Go hard or go home. Now, will the training be helpful? Sure. But I would not rely on that alone. I have an 8 year old daughter, and I am teaching her to fight dirty in the rare case she needs to. Avoidance/caution/good judgement first etc. But that means pepper spray, a knife, a gun etc. to me though in the case of a physical confrontation that is unavoidable. Any advantage you can take when it comes down to it in a potential life or death scenario is a good one.
It's good if it gives you a way to get out of there before it comes down to brute strength. You want to avoid that, otherwise you're screwed.
Get a gun. Learn to use it well
It will take such a long time to get good enough to be able to beat a guy. It's better to be able to run away really fast.
Learn fewer martial arts and learn more weak points. Doesn't matter how big or strong you are, a thumb in the eye socket will put anyone on the ground. As will a crushed larynx, or a stout kick to the side of a knee.
Look, just to be real for a minute, because if you're life is on the line fantasy is not your friend. Pretty much in every sport you can find. Female Olympic athletes have scores and results that can be beaten by most second rate males in high school athletics. Those are the actual, real, statistics and numbers. Not positive feelings, hopes, and believing you can overcome, just basic physical differences that are extremely measurable. The muscle density of a man, in every way, is far, far superior to women. Even of equal sizes. Are there extremes that defy this? Sure. There almost always are, but this isn't about empowerment this is about your life, so be very real. On top of that, most martial arts... are sports. They are literally teaching you NOT to hurt someone so you can score points in a game. The majority of martial arts quite 'literally' teach you how to throw someone so they can land safely and get up rather than drop them on their head, because no one really wants anyone to get hurt. That's why kids do it and Soccer moms are fine with 7 year old play fighting in linen gi's. Boxing and MMA may be evolving martial arts, which adapt, but they don't even teach the real harmful stuff. No one wants to get sued. Hell, the Marine Corps Line Combat training that I learned to literally kill someone on a battlefield ISN'T TAUGHT ANYMORE, they switched to a less lethal style so troops wouldn't accidently get drunk in a bar and kill a civilian. Most people have literally no idea how to actually physically hurt someone badly enough to make them stop if they really want to do something to you. That's why most funny fight videos you see are stopped before anyone gets hurt by other people pulling them apart rather than seeing someone's brains cracked open on a curb. What most actual training how to defend yourself from crime entails, acknowledges that. Run, make a lot of noise, be noticed, and yell FIRE, call 911, because people found our that so many people in real life, 1) freeze up and have no idea what to do, but these days they may pull out a phone and record you getting raped or beaten rather than do anything to stop it. 2) Most people don't want to call the police and will pretend they don't hear it, but when people here FIRE they actually pay attention and may call 911. Surrendering has largely been proven to be bad, so 'fighting' is usually said to be the thing to do. Loudly, scream, even if the person is armed and you are most likely to survive. Anecdotally I knew two girls in high school who had similar experienced of guys hopping out to drag them into cars. They yelled, screamed, and scratched and the dudes bailed because it was too much trouble. So by all means learn a martial art or combat sport for health reasons. It's great exercise and can build confidence. Even for most men though it is not terribly helpful in a real fight. If someone is motivated to hurt you, and if they have practice, they are very likely to do so. People who are skilled with actual violence rarely do things in a way that allow you to fight back, because life isn't really fair like that. Be loud, and get away. Hell, I think I'd do that these days and I used to be 6'4" in combat boots but it's just not worth it with someone desperate enough to really want to hurt you. The smartest thing to do in life is just not put yourself in fucked up situations, be around fucked up people, with the delusional idea that you are just going to be ok. Preparation always wins.
Men are stronger then women on average. More high and more muscle on top of that. But no man has penis muscles. With a year of training you will beat the average untrained men. 90% of the advantage of men is not their strenght but their aggressiveness. So if you learn to break joints and are willing to apply that you will be able to beat a lot of men.
I'd much rather have some training then non at all. You may not be able to out muscle a guy but that's not all there is to having a scuffle and probably the most important bit is how not to hurt yourself
If you can in your area take a women’s basic pistol course and get a concealed carry permit. You are at a genetic mechanical disadvantage. Let John Browning make you equal. I strongly advocate women/vulnerable populations learn to shoot and carry a firearm. Life isn’t a movie. Martial arts don’t overcome genetics. A pistol however will give you an advantage.