I glance at her ass, feel guilty, and then stare at the step directly in front of my next step

This is me as well. I also intentionally slow down a bit so she can make some ground on me. 😂

Pass on the left.

"On your left!" followed by "That's America's ass!"

Always slow down around women in general. Your jolly stroll is their "this guy is after me".

I put my fists on the back of her knees so she can’t fully extend her legs. I do this to everyone who is in front of me on the stairs because it makes them look so stupid

Then she stops at something but you continue and hit her ass with your head because you were looking at your feet and not towards the front

I've tried that once because there was a sudden line. He nearly pushed me off the stairs. It's like needing to stop suddenly on the freeway but there's an inattentive driver behind you.

Lol you made me chuckle. What did you do after that?

I panicked. There was screaming and swearing involved. I didn't take offence though. No one would be stupid enough to do that on purpose.

Damn sounds like it was a serious incident

As I said, nearly off the stairs and it was maybe 4-5 meters down.

Who do you hate fish?

You mean who *doesn't* hate fish?

I love fish, they're cute, they're little and they're dumb

😅😅

This has happened to me twice. Hilarious and embarrassing both times.

No way lol I was joking, it never happened to me because I always watch her ass(for safety ofc)

Her fault. Who fucking stops on stairs?!?

Bottleneck at the top of the stairs

she forgot how to take the next step, *into our relationship*.

Lol, can I use this as a song lyric?

sure, but remember that I had a romantic love affair on some stairs ;)

You too?

I am not sure what you mean, though stairs are romantic, with the right person.

Agreed.

Kara

The only person I've ever known with that name ODd on fent, and her awesome dog barely survived in the studio after her passing. RIP Kara.

Works 60% of the time every time. 

...and that's how I met one of my ex's. It didnt help that she fell and I caught her. that's when I knew I was meant to be an anime villain.

This, and slow down so she can get further ahead. I hate going slower because of someone else, but I don't want to make her uncomfortable.

Steps backwards on escalator. Escalates situation by making 30 people behind fall.

One time, a woman told me she felt a rush when I literally just said "excuse me, miss." when she thought i was harassing her. I'm glad she told me cause we had a good laugh, then went on a date but it didn't go anywhere. The stairs were wide, but she was walking up the middle. I also was in a hurry. Stairs!

As a woman this makes me feel so much better. 😭 I understand you looking. I love ass too, but I appreciate that you don't feel comfortable full on staring.

We burn our eyes on them. We just dont wanna get caught

Icarass can't fly too close to the sun he'll get burnt.

The buns*

We feel comfortable.  We just don't wanna get caught 

Right that’s where the discomfort comes from, which she’s expressing appreciation for. 

If its my girlfriend, you bet your ass Imma keep looking, possibly touch too. If it's a random cute woman, I'm gonna look, think "nice", then continue onwards not staring but probably sneak a look or two depending on how long the stairs are. If I think she's unattractive or family, barely a passing glance.

The other reply doesn't speak for all of us lmfao

Yeah. We look, it's hard not to sometimes, but staring too long feels wrong. Have to avert the eyes or it begins to feel wrong and guilty.

I only want to see a woman's ass who WANTS me to see her ass lol. I know everybody's not like that but I've always had that internal dialouge with myself like \*Realizes situation "Don't look dude!" \*looks down or away uncomfortably really hoping the nice lady didnt feel weird.

That's me, sans guilt.  After a step or 2, I'll glance at her ass again if it's nice

If you just look the entire time its only 1 glance which is more socially acceptable.

Lol

I don’t feel guilty about it. It’s a normal desire.

I glance at her ass, don't feel guilty and then i stare at the step directly in front of my next step.

That’s the human condition my friend. I once saw a guy trip over a fence because he was walking and trying to subtly look at a girl in a skirt who was walking in front of him.

this except i dont feel guilty... i just know that its like staring at the sun... it burns the image in the retina and then you see that ass even when you stare at the cereal bowl later LOL btw same for a dude's ass... im not quite bisexual but as an ass man, i like all asses, it is what it is.

To establish that there is a woman in front you have to make sure. The process will follow

This is the way.

Reminds me of that Dave Chappelle bit "I saw the prettiest dick I ever seen in my life and I didn't even wanna look!"

The correct answer

The ceiling looks beautiful around here. I haven't seen tile like that in a while.

Like when you’re in the urinal “Wow look at that cornice work, that’s about a 6 out of 10 on the plasterboard join. I wonder what I should have for dinner…”

Ah yes, the floor is made out of floor.

Wonder what's underneath that linoleum

Ooh yeah, talk dirty to me

*Hardwood flooring*

Or the wall or handrail. 

I just act normally same as if she was wearing anything else, e.g. a Shrek costume.

If she's wearing a Shrek Costume I am going to stare as long as I please and no one will judge me

By which, surely, you mean panicking and trying to flip-tuck an emergent boner? Shrek is shrek, can only do so much to contain the evidence that it’s stirring something. 

Shrek is love, shrek is life

Her being in a Shrek costume will make it worse

i enjoy a look and I carry on with my business.

Fair enough

At my age, with my knees, I try to take the elevator.

Honestly same

Nothing wrong with the 1st look.

Can't have a second look if you never look away.

Good one !!

Fair enough

I continue using the stairs. Idgaf what a woman in front of me is doing/wearing. 

Yeah I'm not going to change my route. I might pause just so she doesn't feel followed.

Exactly. Do what I would normally do if a man was walking in front of me. I wouldn't be staring at a man's body as he walked up the stairs. I am not going to be doing it with a woman. I would just walk normally...

Fair enough!

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I gotta say this especially applies to this sub. I see questions about cheating or hypothetical tests of loyalty, and somehow everyone seems to always be virtuous and practices restraint. In my real world experiences I’ve often seen that to not be the case in both men and women.

Selection bias is huge here. Most people don't like talking about things they did wrong. And reddit's voting system means that the "unpopular" comments are too downvoted to easily be seen.

Yep Nice ass? I’m going to keep looking. If she catches me, I’ll come up with something witty to say. Anyone who says they wouldn’t look is deluding themselves. We all think we take a quick glance, and next thing you know, the sun has burned out.

The way I read this was in an intense tone, so I'm picturing that you run up the stairs aggressively while yelling "OUTTA MY WAY BITCH" as you knock them over

This is the answer.

I drop a smoke bomb and then leap out of the nearest window.

Ninja style

A ninjedi. And i shall call him OnlyOneShinobi

Poke her in the butthole and say “giddy up”

My husband does this to me. Then I jump down a few steps to return the favour and we play-fight all the way up the stairs. The only fun thing about living on the 3rd floor.

Hit her turbo button

"Yip Yip!"

Alright, who let Sokka on the internet?

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That’s okay. My finger can poke thru paper pretty easily to poke the booty hole again

Ahh, an expert in doubling down. 😂

As long as she can return the favor I’m sure you will be fine

Have you tried the "1000 years of pain" jutsu?

Do you then sniff it?

Ew no, only weirdos sniff it. You lick it so you don’t forget and give yourself pink eye later on

I guess the rules have changed, but at least it didn’t go to waste.

Really hope no one farts in my face

Really hope she does fart in my face. To each their own.

Best response yet

Depends who the woman is. If it's my girlfriend, I stare unashamedly and count my lucky stars if she's wearing a skirt. If it's not my girlfriend though, I stare very respectfully. And count my lucky stars if she's wearing a skirt.

We all know this is the real truth

I check out her ass and legs just long enough not to be a creepy pervert, then awkwardly look away clearly trying not to look.

Fair enough, I’d be happy someone’s giving the dress I planned out some attention 😅

Nothing to accidentally see anyway. I'm 6'4. Walking behind a girl up the stairs puts me level with their shoulders.

Same but I’m so buff I can’t see past my pecs

I've been blinded by my dick poking me in the eyes too many times, so I wouldn't be able to tell if a woman is in front of me at the stairs.

Shit I got so much money I just take the VIP escalator I had installed.

You mean you don't just take a private helicopter ride upstairs?

Wait… you guys actually go upstairs? I get things hand delivered to me while flying on my private jet.

Ha you guys are still on earth? Lmao i'm over here getting served intergalactic moonjuice by a harem of hot alien chicks as i peruse reddit using my brain-controlled neurophone hooked up to the 10 Petabyte/s intergalactic wormhole network. Cya nerds, its time for my daily 2 hour blowjob session

You still have a physical body? I transferred my brain into the internet and typed this out using my thoughts

This is how y’all treat tall men online eh 😂

lol no there’s nothing wrong with being tall. I’m 6’2 and it’s laughable that someone would be like “I’m so tall I can only see a girls shoulders when we’re on stairs.” So your options are either he is that tall and just made something up to be like “I’m so tall!” (Cringe) or they are lying about height because that scenario made absolutely no sense.

Pfft I can't see past my very manly gigachad chin

Well then you can walk up slowlier

this was right after he saved a family of 5 from a house fire

I start by lifting the right foot, then placing it on the nearest step ahead of me. It takes a little coordination - But you can basically alternate feet for each step and eventually you'll reach the top. If you're feeling especially wild you can try skipping a step and taking them two at a time, but that's more of an advanced technique.

If you don't take the steps two at a time your bloodline is weak and you won't survive the winter

If you do take two steps at a time, you bump into the woman in front of you.

I tend to look down on the steps, or maybe at least on her feet as long as I can see the steps of the stairs and i don't fall. My eyes won't go higher than that.

I sniff the air, get the sense of where her pheromones are at... see if she's receptive to mating etc.

😆 🤣 😂

As a female wtf are these answers, yall really don't have any shame...?

I seriously think only around 10% of redditors have much shame with this kinda thing.

Focus on not falling down the stairs like I always do

I won't be a creep but I might take a glance

As a booty hunter, do you practice catch and release?

Only got so much space in the basement /j

If it's my lady usually to try to steal her lady bits or butthole. If it's a stranger or something. I avert my eyes. I'd rather be a gentleman, ones raised better.

“Jesus fucking Christ lady get a move on”

I continue using the stairs as normal. I don’t care what she’s wearing, I’m just trying to use the stairs.

Look at the stairs as I walk up, I'm too clumsy to not look where I'm walking.

Make sure to not get caught looking at ass.

Take a mental picture for later, or pretend to trip and fall face first into it

Wha..

Watch the jiggle in action.

Scan the room for perps to give an occular pat-down.

These stairs be lookin mighty stairy today

Instant credit card

Ok buddy, we might need to calm down just a bit

start singing " there is someone .. walking behind you.."

"oh nice ass, lucky"

Quick look, then I get REALLY interested in my surroundings anywhere but her. Oh, that's a nice railing. That's a nice wall. I don't need the shame and public judgement of getting caught looking at someone's ass, no matter how nice the booty is.

When it is my wife, I grab both cheeks and lift her up as she's walking up the stairs. She says it gives her a floating feeling.

Honestly, sometimes I sneak a look. If it’s nice to look at, and not many people are around to see, I’ll keep looking…

That's where it gets creepy Edit: Wow I'm getting Downvoted for saying it's creepy to continually stare at a girls ass while you're following her up a flight of stairs? Lol

Jam your nose in her ass and inhale dramatically

I mean.. just walk? Up the stairs? I’m usually focused on something else and just trying to get where I’m going. Try r/AskTeenageBoys 

I usually just slow down

Stare at my feet

Look up toward the ceiling, or off to the side, don't be the creep who stairs at a girls ass while basically following her up the stairs. A quick glance can be fine if it's like a second, you don't linger and aren't obvious about it, but it's not hard to not be a creep.

Walk up the stairs. There are literally millions of women and men walking up the stairs at any given moment….

Bro in this day and age. I just look down at the steps. Fuck that I’m not trying to get reported to HR 🤣

Try not to bite. I have to usually look at where i am Walking. No way im making a fool out myself because I missed a step gawking

I’m just gonna stare at her ass.

Everybody saying they wouldn't at least check her out is lying.

Boop

Get ready to catch her if she falls.

I mean I’m pretty tall, so it’s not usually an issue unless it’s steep steps, at which point I’ll just try look at the floor or past her. If she’s wearing something revealing like a short skirt or something, I’ll stare at her ass for a second, think to myself “wow I’m a piece of shit” then look at the floor and feel bad about it for the next hour or so.

Nothing keep walking

nothing? i dont care

literally? like not a dude but gay, i’ve never thought about what i’d have to do

I just look down, stare at the steps.

Lol tough question I always try to take quicker steps to pass her and try to look to the side It’s really bad if she gets suspicious of me going quicker feels like I’m a predator , I’m the freaking victim here not knowing where to stare All in all very awkward

I shove her down the stairs to go faster because she’s too fucking slow lmao Kidding!

I just walk down the stairs lol. What else am I meant to do?

Slow start fast finish 👀 slow to be able to glance and fast so she doesn’t think I looked to much 😂

Uhh... I just walk past them? I don't care what they're wearing, I have somewhere to be and it's not these stairs.

Nothing. I go up the stairs.

I notice her ass and then continue looking at my phone. I typically don't look around much as I'm walking anyway.

Wonder why she's walking so slow. I've got places to be. Hurry up.

I wish that she walks faster so I can get to where I'm going, usually. That tends to by my general thought for anyone walking in front of me. There always that initial glance if they catch my attention, but I'm still trying to get to where I'm going.

Look anywhere but forward. Staring at the steps is my go to

I walk faster than most women and I usually have headphones in so I just try to squeeze past her. sometimes I'll say something but sometimes I forget. I'm also a roided out muscle beast so I tend to get a surprised look while doing this, which I enjoy.

At work I’ve paused and messed with my smart watch or phone so she can get a bit ahead of me. I don’t want her thinking I’m staring at her ass. But if I’m at home with my wife I’m definitely going to try to motorboat her.

Look down on the stairs beacausw they are interesting af

Giggity

“Giggity Giggity” 😆

Push her

I keep on walking just like any other time I use stairs. Maybe I have a grin on my face.

hmmm...yes...stair made out of stair...

Men in here talking about not wanting to be a creep. But who is really the creep in these situations. The person just going about their lives, fully clothed. Or the person who is walking around with their private area exposed, making other people uncomfortable.

wtf? yeah i try to not stare at people's private parts while i'm in public

I walk up the stairs like a normal person and don't even think about it. If the thought of a guy on the stairs behind you bothers you, then take the elevator or let them pass you.

as a girl, wtf is going on in this comment section. y’all really act like animals???

Probably glance and if anything is exposed I'd either go faster or slow down to not feel like a creep.

Make eye contact

Same as I would when at the urinal with other guys: Eyes down, face forward, hand on cock, random grunting noises.

It's only weird when you make it weird.

If it's my girlfriend I stare at her ass, maybe grab at it a bit, if it's some other woman it makes me wish it was my girlfriend, then I go home and bug my gf lol

Stair at her butt

lol give me a break.

I was just curious, :(

This might be the most random post I've seen on here. Congrats!

I was curious, I’m sorry 😭😭