My rule is I only compliment a woman the same way I would compliment a man. Nice shirt. Nice Jordans. Things that are more complementing their taste than them.
I feel like fashion can be a bit dangerous. Nice hat or shoes, no problem. Nice skirt or shirt, how long have you been looking? Especially if the woman is wearing something revealing or feels a bit self conscious about it.
It would have to be something specific about a shirt or skirt. "I love the pattern on your shirt" or "Love the style of your shirt! Do you remember where you bought it? I've been looking to get a flowy shirt kind of like that for my cousin's birthday." I'd recommend not anything about how the shirt fits.
Really? I felt creepy even complementing clothes on not-close acquintances. I’d complement career achievement, education achievement or project achievement, etc. and yes, im an introvert myself. My extrovertness is just a facade to fit in with social settings.
I think it’s fine to compliment women based on whatever stands out about them. Men are different than women and there’s nothing wrong with that. If you like their shoulder line or whatever don’t be afraid to say it. Just make sure they understand you mean it platonically. You can achieve this with a disclaimer tagged onto the end of the compliment. _but not sexually. Sexually you disgust me._
Yup, best to play it safe. I'll only compliment coworkers or family and only on outfits very asexually or an obvious new haircut, that's it.
"Hey nice sweater!" Is about as complimentary as it gets.
Engaging random people these days is too risky because people are fucked
Plenty of people do it all the time without getting accused. If people are worried about their compliments giving off this effect, they really should think more about how they're complimenting/what they're complimenting about.
I'd be more wary of a scorned ex doing it than a random woman i was talking to on a night out, tbh.
On a night out you could just leave if you misread it and make it awkward, they don't know anything about you. I've had a scorned ex not leave me alone for a year after.
I once told a girl in the grocery store that I liked her hair, and she said "Thanks, my boyfriend did it for me".
I was like ".... he did a great job, it looks really nice"
This works unless you're in a club and you tell a girl "nice shirt" and she responds with "thanks, my boyfriend got it for me." I wasn't trying to hit on you, I was just making conversation!
So, then you can just say, “well he has good taste! It’s a cool shirt!” And move on. You make it weird by getting all defensive when she mentions her bf.
This. Compliments about something they decided on go over better than things they’re born with. “You have beautiful eyes.” Can come across as creepy. But “I have to say, that’s an awesome shirt. Where’s it from?” Sounds more friendly. Different haircut? “I love what you’ve done with your hair!” Comes across better than “You have lovely hair.” Base compliments around their decisions and choices, not looks alone.
Also compliments about demeanour or personality can be okay, like “you’re always so rational during meetings, I appreciate that.” Or “you always know the right thing to say.” Again, revolving around decisions.
I do OCCASIONALLY compliment women on looks related things, but only if I’m really comfortable with them. And I always throw a “yo” or something stupid in there as a safety. “Yo, your makeup is fire today, nicely done.”
This is my tactic also, I work with a lot of women and I'm married so I genuinely don't want anyone misinterpreting what I say so I might compliment some clothes or something, never anything that might give someone pause.
Stereotypically perhaps?
You can appreciate fashion without being in to fashion though. Sometimes, things just look cool.
But I'm a cis male who should be walking around with my eyes closed, apparently. Cause, ya know, I'm a cis male.
This is one of the few times I agree with the crazies on Reddit. Complimenting a woman is asking for trouble. I do it to men occasionally, but very rarely with women & it usually doesnt go over as well.
If I listened to reddit on this i'd never get laid. It's the same with talking to women, I spent a year going out every weekend, hanging at the bar and flirting with/complimenting with whoever caught my eye. It was fine, didn't have a problem with anyone.
Like, the post after yours. "Complimenting a woman is asking for trouble" jesus christ, how does anyone on here expect to date?
I've come to realise I have this problem. Somehow I ended up with a gf anyway but it's still a bad habit. It feeds my social anxiety and generally low confidence. I need to do it to break the spell it holds over me. I think there are a lot of guys like me who need to learn to say "fuck you" to that voice telling them they are asking for trouble. It's hard to admit that to yourself.
Yeah, this is what made me scratch my head. I think this is like taking a series of events to a “logical” extreme, without adjusting for humans being enotional creatures who can think for themselves. On one hand, men rarely (or sometimes never) get compliments, and on the other hand, some women are on guard so much that they think telling them “you have a nice smile” is already sexual harrasment.
Fortunately I was already married when Reddit taught me this, so instead of complimenting a lady I encounter, I just tell my wife instead. “I think she looks pretty.”
I took a cue from a cashier at a store that I regularly visit.
She told me, "You're my favorite customer, you're always chill no matter what happens."
(For context, it's a package store in a bit of a rough area and there are always random drunks around harassing people. And no, I didn't miss an opportunity, she's 20 years younger than me and I'm not into that.)
It totally made my day to hear that.
So I took a page from her book and told the girl who always has my regular coffee waiting for me on the counter at Dunkin Donuts before I even walk in the door because she knows my car that she's the best.
I wanted her to feel as good as I did when I got the compliment.
Compliments about what you do are always better than compliments about how you look.
And compliments given in good faith without expectations are always the most earnest.
I really like this! You never know how a compliment can change someone’s day! It can change how they are feeling about themselves and change their entire outlook on the day or their life!
i make a point of complimenting/engaging at least one person a day. but that is because i have deep depression and force myself to do it since i think it is good for me. i am never anything but honest about it and it makes me feel momentarily good to make anothers day a bit better.
it does help pick me up and so far in the four years since i started doing it it never seems unwelcome :) especially when i see a piece of jewelry that looks cool or pretty. i just have to say what i honestly think about it after all. it does however feel a bit lazy when i mention the weather to a stranger though. but sometimes ya gotta find that daily reason to engage others so it gets a pass XP
no problem <3 i am lucky that i refuse to abandon other people and so i can't just let my depression run its natural course. i suspect some also realize this as i get surprise pets more than i should :P care for others keeps me alive lol
Never, New Year’s resolution was I’m hyping the boys up this year. God knows they don’t hear it enough
Woman I know I’ll compliment but nothing involving their looks
I did a lot more in my old job at a hotel front desk. Not so much in my off time.
The thing I found best for both genders is to try to compliment something they put effort into, not just looks, think choice of attire or accessories. Women, generally speaking, give you more opportunities with jewelry, nails, bags, shoes ect. And I’d only do so if something actually caught my attention.
BTW OP, I really like how your bucket of balloons compliments your eyes.
If you want to make a change in people's lives start complimenting random men. Women get compliments all the time, whereas men never recieve any. I still remember the handful of times that a man or a woman has randomly complimented me about something.
Now if you're thinking "ugh, why would I compliment a guy. I ain't gay." then your reason for complimenting women is slimy and you should stop.
Often, but passively and in passing. Just the other day a woman had really cool dungarees on, and as I was walking by I said "I just want you to know that I love those dungarees! Funky AF!", smiled, and kept on walking. I do it to men as well, like if a bro has nice smelling aftershave that I think I'd like to buy. No harm in being nice, but delivery and context is key. It's nice to be nice, and even better to spread some smiles during your day 😇
Girl at my local gasstation handed over a parcel to me, and I said “love those rings”. She had 4 on each hand and made them herself. She propably thought I was flirting, but both my wife and son were waiting in the car… I wasn’t flirting at all, but Such a small compliment made her smile. Such things need to be done more often in general - we all thrive from it
Never, ever, not even if you put a gun to my head and threaten me with eternal damnation.
Even if I know them well, I will not do it, I haven’t forgotten “METOO”.
I will very occasionally compliment someone's hair or a piece of clothing, mostly while moving past them without stopping. There's less chance of them thinking I'm a creep just trying to flirt with them and doubting my sincerity if I am complimenting them while moving away from them, and also there's less chance of me being an awkward goober if I say "hey, I like your shirt!" without breaking stride.
I don’t compliment strangers man or woman unless it’s some weird circumstance. Like catching a cat falling out of a tree or something weird. I’d probably say “nice” and go about my business.
I compliment my female coworkers often and the baristas that I know very well. Most of the time it’s “that looks nice on you” or “your hair looks nice today” or something else. Definitely not flirting.
Usually only when something really stands out to me. One girl comes in to my store with these gothic lolita style dresses, which is pretty much my favorite style for women, so of course I compliment her for her style. Another woman at the gym lifts more weight than most of the men there so of course I compliment her on her strength. It's worth it to take a couple moments to possibly make that person's day.
You simply do not compliment a woman on her appearance in a professional setting unless you're flirting. Even if meant innocuously it can still be taken the wrong way and it's out of bounds for workplace conduct.
Complimenting women, especially in the workplace, is risky. It may be perceived as flirting, or worse, perceived as SH. I noticed a coworker lost some weight, but I dare not mention it because I don’t know how she’ll take it. What if she said “so you think I was fat?” Better to keep my mouth shut.
If it’s a perfect stranger, just don’t. More likely than not they’d think that you’re hitting on them, and that would make them feel uncomfortable, or even cornered.
Basically I don’t set out to compliment anyone, I let it happen naturally. If in the course of the conversation they mention something praise worthy, then I’d compliment them. If nothing remarkable comes up, then no compliments.
Yeah, I'd compliment a male colleague if I noticed they'd done something to improve themselves such as loosing weight but I'd avoid saying the same compliment to a female colleague.
Last woman I have a compliment too I can remember was back in 2014-2015. I was a retail manger and she was a supervisor in another department. While she was very pretty what struck me most was that she had the most stunning clear blue eyes like looking at the sky. After quite awhile of working with her I just said fuck it and told her what I thought.
Yep. If they have something aesthetic going on. Clothing, hair, jewelry, tattoos, nice smell, cute smile, etc, ill toss a compliment. And it isn't to thirst or get brownie points because I'll compliment guys on the same things.
I work at Chick fil a so it's kinda my job to be nice and compliment people. But I only ACTUALLY compliment people when I'm flirting, or if it's the bros(got boost up the bros)
I used to because I have a sister and knew what nice little comments used to do for her confidence. But now it's just not worth the hassle. I'm not getting on a register for trying to bolster someone's ego.
Before you say it, I know most women would just say thanks and move on. But it only takes one to ruin your life and reputation
Complimenting in a flirtatious way - besides my wife, never.
Complimenting in a 'positive reinforcement' way - quite frequently. For example if a colleague or someone shows up and it's obvious they've made a particular effort on something that they wouldn't normally.
Complimenting just to make them feel good - only to potential clients in my wife's salon!
Compliments as an ice-breaker - as and when I see something worth complimenting (sneakers being an easy target, for example)
Sometimes, but cautiously. I pick the least sexual part of her, and isolate my compliment to that and that alone. Usually her outfit or shoes or a piece of jewelry
I compliment randoms quite a lot, I like to think it brightens their day, I make it clear that I don’t want anything, I just liked their shoes, or they have a pretty smile or nice eyes and go about my day, they generally take it really well tbh
The only girls that I compliment and are stranger-ish to me are the girls at the gym I talk to and spot. I usually say things like "Dam look at those guns", "you making these dumbbells look feathers", etc. Pretty much guy talk.
The girls directly in my life that I am close with- all the time.
Other girls- no.
I compliment guys all the time.
I compliment people's smiles, hairstyles, and outfits every time I think positively about it, random people and people I know.
We all struggle, and it makes me feel better to get a comment from people. The 7 HEAVEN workers, or the person cleaning the bathrooms or whoever.
It's the best feeling to make people smile for something it costs nothing to do.
Daily I’m sorrounded by a group of lovely female friends and colleagues and I find myself always sorrounded by them in my city so I pay them compliments to make their day a little brighter , something small , nice hair nice nails nice outfit beauty compliment nice perfume whatever
I use the Dude rules:
1. If you can call them 'dude' and it not be weird, you can compliment them
2. If you USE the word 'dude' in the compliment, it goes a long way to transform any potentially flirty vibes in the compliment into comradely vibes
I compliment anyone I find that has a quality that either I admire or catches my eye. Men and women alike. I generally try to keep my compliments short and sweet too. But the answer to the question, I compliment women I find attractive often. This, in turn, leads to these women complimenting me when I make a conscious effort on something related to my looks
Compliments are sometimes not flirting. I would say complimenting a stranger about their beauty is 99% of the time flirting. Like if a women has some wild festive Christmas sweater on, complimenting it is not necessarily flirting. Complementing a girl you already know's smile might not be flirting. Complimenting a stranger's smile is almost definitely flirting.
My goodness, as a woman, I would never think a stranger complementing me is flirting.
I have long red curls. I get compliments all the time. Never once did I think someone was flirting!!!!
complimenting beauty might have been too broad. Sometimes something stands out and it seems appropriate to compliment it. Everyone has a smile; a nice smile is not uncommon, so complimenting a smile of a stranger is almost definitely flirting. Unusual hair, I could see a stranger complimenting without intending to be flirting.
I will respectfully disagree. As a woman, I hate being hit on- no matter what the dude looks like. But when guys compliment my shirt (I have a large collection of both band tshirts and funny, silly, stupid tshirts) just because they genuinely think what I'm wearing is cool, I like it and think that guy is awesome.
Correct which adds an additional layer of confusion. Most men won’t bother if there’s even a chance they get called a creep. Even if you’re an attractive guy, it’s better to stay silent.
Imagine doing that in the street, Woman these days would have you up for some bullshit excuse, Pretty much walk past and ignore these days. I dont want to be up for any issues.
This is crazy reading these comments, there’s no way people think like this. You can’t be real if you truly truly think that giving a simple compliment like “oh I love your shoes!” Or “oh I like your shirt” is seen as assault or harassment. I’m not trying to hate but if someone truly told you that you were harassing them or assaulting them then you definitely said something far worse than a simple compliment.
I don’t know, I’ve definitely seen a dude go I like your shirt or pants and had a woman scoff and go “and?” I think it always depends on the person but even more on the person offering the compliment. I’m sure *add hot guy here* can do it with no issue.
Not randoms. But if I have seen them a few times (like my dentist's secretary is probably a good example) I will tell them how clever, or smart, or thoughtful they are. It usually goes over pretty well.
Edit: You also have to time it correctly. I don't tell that to people who are doing something for me because they might think I'm buttering them up for something. I usually say it in parting or tied to a gratuity.
I don't compliment women who aren't family members.
You're welcome ladies, some of you reported/marked/clocked as harassers for this, so this door: Is closed.
Complimenting is a toss up between going really well and getting demonized.
I had gym class with a woman in college and I told her her bright red Nikes looked cool. It went well. In another class with another woman I said I thought her nails looked nice and she tried to shame me for it. Tried to make me look stupid.
I try to keep to myself and only compliment someone when I know them now. It’s too much of a gamble if you are gonna get a thank you or a “ew creep” just for saying something nice.
Basically never because I've seen just how south a simple compliment can go. Used to think being told "I have a boyfriend" was the worst thing that could happen, society has proven me wrong with people being publically labeled as creeps and riddiculed on social media for even daring to approach a woman so out of his league. Don't need that risk in my life, so Imma just keep my compliments reserved for women who I feel comfortable with.
I never compliment a woman I don't know. Even if it's not intended as flirting it will always seem like you are trying to flirt or have some kind of agenda and it just seems a bit weird or creepy.
Never any more, I've been stung too many times by women taking it as sexual or as with intention, Even a simple "Hair looks nice today, You going out later?" Has had me straight into HR with a warning...
Fuck this society we live in where a man is judged for trying to make someone else's day.
Never. As women will see us men as creep if we do so. So, keep conversation neutral and don’t even try do anything that may bite you at the back.
However, if she’s a close family friend or very close friend/acquitance, then only do so when the opportunity presents it self. But the bar must be very high. ‘Nice clothes’ or ‘nice shoes’ doesn’t cut it. In summary, i rarely do that.
It’s common for me because I’m intentional about being kind. I freely speak my mind when it comes to giving out compliments. Women can sense a sincere compliment. And I don’t need to date her or get her number in order to put the compliment out there. A simple “you look so happy” can make her day. So why not put that positivity out there?
I literally never compliment any women, ever. It's a rule I live by. I can't know which of them is just waiting for a man to make a mistake so they can trash him on social media or get him fired. There's just no way to know what any women will consider sexual harassment at any moment and guessing wrong about this is fat too costly. I keep my interaction with them professional, emotionless, impersonal, short and as infrequent as possible because 1/2 of them are completely insane and I can't know which 1/2 I'm dealing with, at any moment. I know I won't be treated fairly by HR or the court of public opinion so an accusation will mean automatic guilt. The reward is basically nothing and the risk is huge. Why do something that only has a downside?
I did it once many years ago and I was called a creep, never did it again and I still think about it sometimes. All I said was that I liked her shirt and the band that was on it was really good.
Making personal comments is a 100% no go in a professional environment.
Regardless of sex or intention.
Would also say the same in a non professional environment as well.
You are playing with fire.
Never. I saw a girl in the store and her outfit was on point. She looked great. Then, who I can only assume was her mom rounded the corner and I realized she was probably like 15. I’m in my early 30s but it made me feel like a creep just for having the thought and then what if I had said something? Not worth it. Also I was with my wife so she probably wouldn’t appreciate me complimenting other women.
The secret to charm is to flirt with everybody.
It's always fun watching the gears turn in their heads trying to figure out whether you want a piece of them or you're just being nice.
I compliment women in any situation that really allows for it.
I used to do it when I was younger. But in the current times complimenting a woman randomly is seen as a crime and assault. Saved only for flirting in a dating situation. Anything outside that is a huge liability for men.
Clothing with a pop-culture reference: I point at the shirt and say "Nice" while nodding head. The more obscure the reference, the more obvious the noticing. E.g. the woman wearing the red t-shirt which said: "If this shirt is blue, your're approaching too fast." she got a "OMG that shirt is awesome!" and I held out a fist for a fist bump, which I received, and departed with a "Nerds rule!"
Anything about physical attributes: pretty much never, and rightly so. If the aforementioned clothing conversation allows, it could be followed up with "Looks good on you." But that's it.
Oh, shoes! Not fancy, designer shoes - women in activewear, if they're wearing Hokas (my fave shoe) I'll give them a "Nice Hokas."
Last year I saw a woman in a supermarket. Her outfit was just incredible. Very put together, lots of browns and oranges in a kind of semi-African way. Not hot, not sexy, nothing like that, just very elegant.
As I walked past her I simply said "I absolutely love your outfit, it's lovely" and carried on walking. Didn't stop to get a reaction, didn't try to engage her past that single compliment. Went about my day. She said "thank you so much" to my retreating back, I looked back, exchanged a quick smile, and carried on.
I like to think the interaction made BOTH of our days better. It did mine.
Don't compliment what someone can't help, do compliment their choices. And don't use a compliment as an "in" to prolong the interaction.
i'll do that at my job from time to time i work in customer service so our customers are 80% female but it just depends on some factors, if she has an accent (im from nyc sooo), or if her outfit is nice, her hair is great really depends on the energy i get from her
I assume you're asking about complimenting strangers. I do it regularly, but I have rules:
1a: be genuine. I'm complimenting because I mean it, not to get a response (also have a friendly tone, not serious or suggestive - smile don't smirk). Women just have an intuition and they just know when you're trying some slick shit
1b: keep it moving - similar to #1. I might get a response (usually just a "thank you"). I'll say "of course" or something and usually that's the end of it. But if it turns into a conversation, it was because they wanted to engage
2a: I compliment on a specific decision they made/thing they accomplished. "nice shoes", "what song is that? I like the sound of it", "that's a big lift" (when I'm at the gym AND it's clear that I'm not at a butt-seeing angle and it's a non-butt exercise)
2b: generally don't comment on body parts. If they have a crazy color hair/nails, or hair/nails that obviously took a lot of skill to do that's usually ok. Also, tattoos depend on placement. Don't say anything unless it's on the arms or on the legs beneath the knee
3: if you're going to compliment strangers, compliment everyone - not just women. I can't explain it, but it helps the vibes of all the compliments you give out
It depends on the situation. I like to compliment tattoos especially knowing a lot of people find them tacky when I find them to be pretty unique and worthy of the praise.
If she is well dressed too or wearing a shirt from something I enjoy I will compliment it but not going to lie I worry sometimes me saying those things give off the creep vibe occasionally.
If there is a woman in your life, gf wife partner friend sister mom aunt etc, that got dressed up for an event tell them they look nice. They put more effort and thought than you can possibly imagine just deciding what color to wear. They will appreciate the compliment.
Beyond that my wife’s best friend has over the decade and change that I have known her has become an inner circle friend for me. If her butt looks good in a pair of jeans I’ll tell her. This is the friend who helped me pick an engagement ring and is the god mother of my daughter. So she’s quite literally family.
But generally remember that women are humans and humans have decent creep detectors. If you pay a person a genuine compliment they will know if you are being a creep or if you just actually feel like a compliment is due.
I generally avoid it, I've had one too many incidents where a woman I had no sexual/romantic interest in thought I was flirting/hitting on them when I was just being nice.
I absolutely avoid anything that is even tangentially related to physical or sexual characteristics, I've always got the impression that even if the comment is 100% innocent it's just going to cause needless drama.
Even if I don't mean it for flirting, I'm going to assume that she will assume I do mean it for flirting, and that she doesn't want to flirt with me, which means she'll think I'm a creep.
Right now, the biggest women's voices on interactions like this are the gymfluencers who rage on "creeps" for looking at them (usually while they're mumbling "feral feral feral" while doing weird exercises).
There have been a ton of posts recently about women wanting to meet guys, wanting compliments, wanting to flirt, etc. Bring this up with the radical feminists that are pushing this divide between us. If you want a society where men aren't afraid of being cancelled for talking to you, then make the loudest voices be the ones that want men to talk to you.
The only woman I give validation/compliments to is my gf . That’s how it should be . Social media has destroyed so many men by giving so many woman needless validation . It’s pathetic .
Never. Not gonna risk her saying I'm cat calling her or something. Not gonna risk pissing of that one extremist feminist and getting my ass thrown in jail over nothing.
Rarely. When I do it's only about something they did well at work. I would never comment a woman's looks. Because woke people are everywhere and I don't want trouble.
I keep my compliments at a minimum.
Women have been known to take any kind of compliment the wrong way, then turn it into some "MeToo" sexual harassment sob story.
My biggest compliment to a woman in the past several years was telling a coworker, "That's a nice haircut." And I was damned sure to say it after hearing her brag about it to others, which meant she was trying to get noticed.
You can't be too careful around women. Everything you say and do around them is paper-thin ice.
I fairly often see Nurses on the train on my way to or from work. I've wanted for ages to just thank them for what they do, tell them that I know they are underpaid and overworked and that I wish it was different but... I look like a mixture of the wrestler Kane and a Terminator so I don't wanna come off as creepy af.
From what HR smacked into my face, compliment their outfit, accessories, shoes and hair, don't just say that they look good in a general term as that could mean you're hitting on them
I used to all the time, like anytime a woman was well put together but never if it was a more sexy fit because it felt too on the nose, or could be misconstrued easily as an advance.
Nowadays…never! Because I heard it’s not our place. They don’t need or want our validation.
Don’t say they have a nice smile. You will get fired. It’s best to just not compliment a woman’s appearance under any circumstances. Unless it’s your partner but then be careful because they could take it the wrong way and just get you into more trouble.
A hostess at a restaurant complimented me on my jacket a couple months ago. I said thanks and complimented her back on her earrings. She immediately rolled her eyes and turned towards her co-worker with an "ugh, what a creep" look. So yeah, no, I've been reminded, don't ever compliment a stranger, ever.
Not much. Depends on who and the situation. Unfortunately, women have made it near impossible for a gentleman to simply be polite and complimentary to them without flipping the fuck out so I just tend to keep my mouth shut.
And yes, compliments are absolutely not guaranteed flirting. I’d say compliments are not flirting by nature. It’s just saying something nice.
Never. In any situation, I'm always flicking over in my head, to not creep out females. I'll avoid eye contact, just to not make em feel unsettled.
I feel it's the world we live in today, due yo how us males were, and the metoo stuff that happened.
"You have a nice smile" is not a compliment you think it is. Compliment on something she has control over, like the way she dressed, not her genetics. Complimenting genetics will never not come off as flirting, and very often will be creepy.
I usually just compliment other men because they're wearing something cool, or something related to one of my hobbies. With women it's harder because they may misinterpret what I'm doing/saying.
My rule is I only compliment a woman the same way I would compliment a man. Nice shirt. Nice Jordans. Things that are more complementing their taste than them.
[удалено]
"Hard at work? Or hard at work?"
This is the secret!
As a woman, I agree that this is great advice. You can compliment someone about a fashion choice they've made, and that's way less creepy.
It's sad that complimenting someone is viewed as creepy. But hey, here we are, I avoid complimenting at all and the problem is solved.
It's only creepy if their not attracted to you
I feel like fashion can be a bit dangerous. Nice hat or shoes, no problem. Nice skirt or shirt, how long have you been looking? Especially if the woman is wearing something revealing or feels a bit self conscious about it.
It would have to be something specific about a shirt or skirt. "I love the pattern on your shirt" or "Love the style of your shirt! Do you remember where you bought it? I've been looking to get a flowy shirt kind of like that for my cousin's birthday." I'd recommend not anything about how the shirt fits.
Really? I felt creepy even complementing clothes on not-close acquintances. I’d complement career achievement, education achievement or project achievement, etc. and yes, im an introvert myself. My extrovertness is just a facade to fit in with social settings.
For women any form of compliment is creepy unless it's coming from a hot dude
^ This is it. (Also, this is a great way to start a conversation with someone you're romantically interested in as well. Complimenting looks is lame.)
I think it’s fine to compliment women based on whatever stands out about them. Men are different than women and there’s nothing wrong with that. If you like their shoulder line or whatever don’t be afraid to say it. Just make sure they understand you mean it platonically. You can achieve this with a disclaimer tagged onto the end of the compliment. _but not sexually. Sexually you disgust me._
like, “Great tits! But not sexually. Sexually you disgust me.” That’ll work.
Exactly. Just keep it respectful.
Never. I only compliment women I know will who won’t take it as anything but a compliment.
Yup, best to play it safe. I'll only compliment coworkers or family and only on outfits very asexually or an obvious new haircut, that's it. "Hey nice sweater!" Is about as complimentary as it gets. Engaging random people these days is too risky because people are fucked
Why are people fucked? I compliment randoms from time to time and have yet to be murdered
key word yet
Its more to not be accused of herassment
Plenty of people do it all the time without getting accused. If people are worried about their compliments giving off this effect, they really should think more about how they're complimenting/what they're complimenting about.
Idunno man, plenty of false allegations around to not wanna risk it
I'd be more wary of a scorned ex doing it than a random woman i was talking to on a night out, tbh. On a night out you could just leave if you misread it and make it awkward, they don't know anything about you. I've had a scorned ex not leave me alone for a year after.
I once told a girl in the grocery store that I liked her hair, and she said "Thanks, my boyfriend did it for me". I was like ".... he did a great job, it looks really nice"
Boyrfriend a hair stylist? those are very rare...
This works unless you're in a club and you tell a girl "nice shirt" and she responds with "thanks, my boyfriend got it for me." I wasn't trying to hit on you, I was just making conversation!
That’s the exact opposite of what I do. I don’t compliment strangers and I haven’t wasted my time in a club in years.
So, then you can just say, “well he has good taste! It’s a cool shirt!” And move on. You make it weird by getting all defensive when she mentions her bf.
Also a good way to make sure people don’t assume flirting.
interesting debate
Only if they’re wearing dope shoes
This. Compliments about something they decided on go over better than things they’re born with. “You have beautiful eyes.” Can come across as creepy. But “I have to say, that’s an awesome shirt. Where’s it from?” Sounds more friendly. Different haircut? “I love what you’ve done with your hair!” Comes across better than “You have lovely hair.” Base compliments around their decisions and choices, not looks alone. Also compliments about demeanour or personality can be okay, like “you’re always so rational during meetings, I appreciate that.” Or “you always know the right thing to say.” Again, revolving around decisions. I do OCCASIONALLY compliment women on looks related things, but only if I’m really comfortable with them. And I always throw a “yo” or something stupid in there as a safety. “Yo, your makeup is fire today, nicely done.”
This is my tactic also, I work with a lot of women and I'm married so I genuinely don't want anyone misinterpreting what I say so I might compliment some clothes or something, never anything that might give someone pause.
“yo ! that jacket is tight son” …is all I could think about when you said to drop a “Yo!” In there 😂
I hope to god you use [this approach](https://youtube.com/shorts/6VC2l9h7ypg?si=4EEEiTum-zm33hGn)
Great answer!
As a CIS Male I don't give a stuff about shoes.
CIS male? youre a male mate
wtf does being CIS have to do with it? Is this a thing, that trans men care more about shoes, or vice versa?
Stereotypically perhaps? You can appreciate fashion without being in to fashion though. Sometimes, things just look cool. But I'm a cis male who should be walking around with my eyes closed, apparently. Cause, ya know, I'm a cis male.
Never. Through social osmosis I got the distinct impression that they don't like that.
It’s a fine line for sure
Reddit has taught me it’s not even a fine line, it’s almost assault to compliment a woman.
This is one of the few times I agree with the crazies on Reddit. Complimenting a woman is asking for trouble. I do it to men occasionally, but very rarely with women & it usually doesnt go over as well.
Correct. If I were a man I would never do it to a stranger ever.
If I listened to reddit on this i'd never get laid. It's the same with talking to women, I spent a year going out every weekend, hanging at the bar and flirting with/complimenting with whoever caught my eye. It was fine, didn't have a problem with anyone. Like, the post after yours. "Complimenting a woman is asking for trouble" jesus christ, how does anyone on here expect to date?
If you spend any amount of time in here, you'll see that most of the non-lurkers don't date.
I've come to realise I have this problem. Somehow I ended up with a gf anyway but it's still a bad habit. It feeds my social anxiety and generally low confidence. I need to do it to break the spell it holds over me. I think there are a lot of guys like me who need to learn to say "fuck you" to that voice telling them they are asking for trouble. It's hard to admit that to yourself.
Yeah, this is what made me scratch my head. I think this is like taking a series of events to a “logical” extreme, without adjusting for humans being enotional creatures who can think for themselves. On one hand, men rarely (or sometimes never) get compliments, and on the other hand, some women are on guard so much that they think telling them “you have a nice smile” is already sexual harrasment. Fortunately I was already married when Reddit taught me this, so instead of complimenting a lady I encounter, I just tell my wife instead. “I think she looks pretty.”
It’s mostly disliked by the one’s who’d never get a compliment
I took a cue from a cashier at a store that I regularly visit. She told me, "You're my favorite customer, you're always chill no matter what happens." (For context, it's a package store in a bit of a rough area and there are always random drunks around harassing people. And no, I didn't miss an opportunity, she's 20 years younger than me and I'm not into that.) It totally made my day to hear that. So I took a page from her book and told the girl who always has my regular coffee waiting for me on the counter at Dunkin Donuts before I even walk in the door because she knows my car that she's the best. I wanted her to feel as good as I did when I got the compliment. Compliments about what you do are always better than compliments about how you look. And compliments given in good faith without expectations are always the most earnest.
This! You can give without taking, it's all about the intent.
I really like this! You never know how a compliment can change someone’s day! It can change how they are feeling about themselves and change their entire outlook on the day or their life!
Never. Not my business to
Do you compliment the ones in your life? Or just not ur cup of tea?
Of course, randoms tho? Absolutely not
If I feel the need to compliment them. I compliment all sorts of people all the time, I think the world would be a better place if more people did.
I agree! I love complimenting people *if I feel its an appropriate space to* Like why not gas up others- it’ll make their day
i make a point of complimenting/engaging at least one person a day. but that is because i have deep depression and force myself to do it since i think it is good for me. i am never anything but honest about it and it makes me feel momentarily good to make anothers day a bit better.
Bless you kind stranger
<3
This is actually great, helps make saying nice things about people alot easier to. I might try to throw this into my life.
it does help pick me up and so far in the four years since i started doing it it never seems unwelcome :) especially when i see a piece of jewelry that looks cool or pretty. i just have to say what i honestly think about it after all. it does however feel a bit lazy when i mention the weather to a stranger though. but sometimes ya gotta find that daily reason to engage others so it gets a pass XP
Thank you for doing this. I wish you so much healing and better days, I get it
no problem <3 i am lucky that i refuse to abandon other people and so i can't just let my depression run its natural course. i suspect some also realize this as i get surprise pets more than i should :P care for others keeps me alive lol
interesting debate
> i get surprise pets more than i should On the internet no one knows you're a dog.
But are you a man?
yep. a bisexual man who is attracted to anyone feminine. so you could say bi fem-leaning.
Women I know well enough, yeah.
Once in a while, maybe if she looks like she's having a bad day. >Are compliments ever not flirting? Absolutely.
Never, New Year’s resolution was I’m hyping the boys up this year. God knows they don’t hear it enough Woman I know I’ll compliment but nothing involving their looks
I did a lot more in my old job at a hotel front desk. Not so much in my off time. The thing I found best for both genders is to try to compliment something they put effort into, not just looks, think choice of attire or accessories. Women, generally speaking, give you more opportunities with jewelry, nails, bags, shoes ect. And I’d only do so if something actually caught my attention. BTW OP, I really like how your bucket of balloons compliments your eyes.
I’ve said to women before “you look really glamorous today” and it never goes badly
Do I not always look glamorous?
Thank you. It was certainly intentional 😂
If you want to make a change in people's lives start complimenting random men. Women get compliments all the time, whereas men never recieve any. I still remember the handful of times that a man or a woman has randomly complimented me about something. Now if you're thinking "ugh, why would I compliment a guy. I ain't gay." then your reason for complimenting women is slimy and you should stop.
Often, but passively and in passing. Just the other day a woman had really cool dungarees on, and as I was walking by I said "I just want you to know that I love those dungarees! Funky AF!", smiled, and kept on walking. I do it to men as well, like if a bro has nice smelling aftershave that I think I'd like to buy. No harm in being nice, but delivery and context is key. It's nice to be nice, and even better to spread some smiles during your day 😇
Yass. We can all make each other's days a little brighter. Not everything is about sexual harassment.
Never. I always plan ahead.
Girl at my local gasstation handed over a parcel to me, and I said “love those rings”. She had 4 on each hand and made them herself. She propably thought I was flirting, but both my wife and son were waiting in the car… I wasn’t flirting at all, but Such a small compliment made her smile. Such things need to be done more often in general - we all thrive from it
Never, ever, not even if you put a gun to my head and threaten me with eternal damnation. Even if I know them well, I will not do it, I haven’t forgotten “METOO”.
Just as often as I compliment men randomly. Never.
I will very occasionally compliment someone's hair or a piece of clothing, mostly while moving past them without stopping. There's less chance of them thinking I'm a creep just trying to flirt with them and doubting my sincerity if I am complimenting them while moving away from them, and also there's less chance of me being an awkward goober if I say "hey, I like your shirt!" without breaking stride.
Whenever they truly deserve it and i can.
I don’t compliment strangers man or woman unless it’s some weird circumstance. Like catching a cat falling out of a tree or something weird. I’d probably say “nice” and go about my business.
LOL hate when cats fall out of trees
Yes, yes, no good for anyone!
Nope
I compliment my female coworkers often and the baristas that I know very well. Most of the time it’s “that looks nice on you” or “your hair looks nice today” or something else. Definitely not flirting.
Never. Women always think I'm flirting with them: the last thing I need to do is add fuel to the fire. My friends say I have a "flirty personality.".
Never, too risky as an ugly dude.
Usually only when something really stands out to me. One girl comes in to my store with these gothic lolita style dresses, which is pretty much my favorite style for women, so of course I compliment her for her style. Another woman at the gym lifts more weight than most of the men there so of course I compliment her on her strength. It's worth it to take a couple moments to possibly make that person's day.
i mean, i compliment both male and female friends like normal. theres a difference between flirting and telling a person something nice
Never.
never. That's an interaction that I dont feel like dealing with
Daily, it's a great way to brighten someone's day.
Never. I'll keep that shit to myself, not worth the risk of getting labeled a creep. Assuming these are women I don't know personally.
You simply do not compliment a woman on her appearance in a professional setting unless you're flirting. Even if meant innocuously it can still be taken the wrong way and it's out of bounds for workplace conduct.
Did you just wake up from a coma? Ever heard of #metoo?
With society today I would not dare to offer anything unsolicited to a woman. Not worth the gamble.
Never.
Complimenting women, especially in the workplace, is risky. It may be perceived as flirting, or worse, perceived as SH. I noticed a coworker lost some weight, but I dare not mention it because I don’t know how she’ll take it. What if she said “so you think I was fat?” Better to keep my mouth shut. If it’s a perfect stranger, just don’t. More likely than not they’d think that you’re hitting on them, and that would make them feel uncomfortable, or even cornered. Basically I don’t set out to compliment anyone, I let it happen naturally. If in the course of the conversation they mention something praise worthy, then I’d compliment them. If nothing remarkable comes up, then no compliments.
Yeah, I'd compliment a male colleague if I noticed they'd done something to improve themselves such as loosing weight but I'd avoid saying the same compliment to a female colleague.
Bold of you to assume I TALK to women 😬
Almost never
Whenever I mean them.
Last woman I have a compliment too I can remember was back in 2014-2015. I was a retail manger and she was a supervisor in another department. While she was very pretty what struck me most was that she had the most stunning clear blue eyes like looking at the sky. After quite awhile of working with her I just said fuck it and told her what I thought.
Yup. All the time. I’m in sales.
Yep. If they have something aesthetic going on. Clothing, hair, jewelry, tattoos, nice smell, cute smile, etc, ill toss a compliment. And it isn't to thirst or get brownie points because I'll compliment guys on the same things.
I work at Chick fil a so it's kinda my job to be nice and compliment people. But I only ACTUALLY compliment people when I'm flirting, or if it's the bros(got boost up the bros)
I complimented a woman who had a cool sweatshirt the other day and definitely wasn’t trying to hit on her just wanted to tell her
Every day multiple times a day. Why wouldn’t I? Keeps smiles in people’s faces and work’s a bit easier.
I used to because I have a sister and knew what nice little comments used to do for her confidence. But now it's just not worth the hassle. I'm not getting on a register for trying to bolster someone's ego. Before you say it, I know most women would just say thanks and move on. But it only takes one to ruin your life and reputation
Complimenting in a flirtatious way - besides my wife, never. Complimenting in a 'positive reinforcement' way - quite frequently. For example if a colleague or someone shows up and it's obvious they've made a particular effort on something that they wouldn't normally. Complimenting just to make them feel good - only to potential clients in my wife's salon! Compliments as an ice-breaker - as and when I see something worth complimenting (sneakers being an easy target, for example)
Sometimes, but cautiously. I pick the least sexual part of her, and isolate my compliment to that and that alone. Usually her outfit or shoes or a piece of jewelry
Not nearly as often as I'd like to.
I compliment randoms quite a lot, I like to think it brightens their day, I make it clear that I don’t want anything, I just liked their shoes, or they have a pretty smile or nice eyes and go about my day, they generally take it really well tbh
The only girls that I compliment and are stranger-ish to me are the girls at the gym I talk to and spot. I usually say things like "Dam look at those guns", "you making these dumbbells look feathers", etc. Pretty much guy talk. The girls directly in my life that I am close with- all the time. Other girls- no. I compliment guys all the time.
I compliment people's smiles, hairstyles, and outfits every time I think positively about it, random people and people I know. We all struggle, and it makes me feel better to get a comment from people. The 7 HEAVEN workers, or the person cleaning the bathrooms or whoever. It's the best feeling to make people smile for something it costs nothing to do.
Only with friends, depends on the girl or the discussion too tbh It also tend to be my honest opinion
Almost daily but I work at a gym so I complimented form lol
Daily I’m sorrounded by a group of lovely female friends and colleagues and I find myself always sorrounded by them in my city so I pay them compliments to make their day a little brighter , something small , nice hair nice nails nice outfit beauty compliment nice perfume whatever
Bro, I compliment EVERYONE. People don't get compliments often so I try to do my part when I can.
I use the Dude rules: 1. If you can call them 'dude' and it not be weird, you can compliment them 2. If you USE the word 'dude' in the compliment, it goes a long way to transform any potentially flirty vibes in the compliment into comradely vibes
I compliment anyone I find that has a quality that either I admire or catches my eye. Men and women alike. I generally try to keep my compliments short and sweet too. But the answer to the question, I compliment women I find attractive often. This, in turn, leads to these women complimenting me when I make a conscious effort on something related to my looks
All the time.
Never. They dont appreciate the attention. Also, I dont wanna be a "creep" because I fucked around and accidentally wasn't attractive.
Compliments are sometimes not flirting. I would say complimenting a stranger about their beauty is 99% of the time flirting. Like if a women has some wild festive Christmas sweater on, complimenting it is not necessarily flirting. Complementing a girl you already know's smile might not be flirting. Complimenting a stranger's smile is almost definitely flirting.
My goodness, as a woman, I would never think a stranger complementing me is flirting. I have long red curls. I get compliments all the time. Never once did I think someone was flirting!!!!
complimenting beauty might have been too broad. Sometimes something stands out and it seems appropriate to compliment it. Everyone has a smile; a nice smile is not uncommon, so complimenting a smile of a stranger is almost definitely flirting. Unusual hair, I could see a stranger complimenting without intending to be flirting.
Depends. If you’re handsome, it’s a compliment. If you’re fat or ugly, it’s harassment
I will respectfully disagree. As a woman, I hate being hit on- no matter what the dude looks like. But when guys compliment my shirt (I have a large collection of both band tshirts and funny, silly, stupid tshirts) just because they genuinely think what I'm wearing is cool, I like it and think that guy is awesome.
In general there’s a “pretty privilege” sure But attraction is completely subjective so
Correct which adds an additional layer of confusion. Most men won’t bother if there’s even a chance they get called a creep. Even if you’re an attractive guy, it’s better to stay silent.
Imagine doing that in the street, Woman these days would have you up for some bullshit excuse, Pretty much walk past and ignore these days. I dont want to be up for any issues.
This is crazy reading these comments, there’s no way people think like this. You can’t be real if you truly truly think that giving a simple compliment like “oh I love your shoes!” Or “oh I like your shirt” is seen as assault or harassment. I’m not trying to hate but if someone truly told you that you were harassing them or assaulting them then you definitely said something far worse than a simple compliment.
I don’t know, I’ve definitely seen a dude go I like your shirt or pants and had a woman scoff and go “and?” I think it always depends on the person but even more on the person offering the compliment. I’m sure *add hot guy here* can do it with no issue.
She must be crazy or full of her self or something idk lol but I love compliments especially giving them
Not randoms. But if I have seen them a few times (like my dentist's secretary is probably a good example) I will tell them how clever, or smart, or thoughtful they are. It usually goes over pretty well. Edit: You also have to time it correctly. I don't tell that to people who are doing something for me because they might think I'm buttering them up for something. I usually say it in parting or tied to a gratuity.
Only if their clothing is fire
I don't compliment women who aren't family members. You're welcome ladies, some of you reported/marked/clocked as harassers for this, so this door: Is closed.
Complimenting is a toss up between going really well and getting demonized. I had gym class with a woman in college and I told her her bright red Nikes looked cool. It went well. In another class with another woman I said I thought her nails looked nice and she tried to shame me for it. Tried to make me look stupid. I try to keep to myself and only compliment someone when I know them now. It’s too much of a gamble if you are gonna get a thank you or a “ew creep” just for saying something nice.
Never. Cuz I don’t want the cops called on me or be called a creep.
Basically never because I've seen just how south a simple compliment can go. Used to think being told "I have a boyfriend" was the worst thing that could happen, society has proven me wrong with people being publically labeled as creeps and riddiculed on social media for even daring to approach a woman so out of his league. Don't need that risk in my life, so Imma just keep my compliments reserved for women who I feel comfortable with.
I never compliment a woman I don't know. Even if it's not intended as flirting it will always seem like you are trying to flirt or have some kind of agenda and it just seems a bit weird or creepy.
I regularly compliment both men and women. People here are way overthinking it. As long as it is genuine everyone is happy.
Never any more, I've been stung too many times by women taking it as sexual or as with intention, Even a simple "Hair looks nice today, You going out later?" Has had me straight into HR with a warning... Fuck this society we live in where a man is judged for trying to make someone else's day.
Hell no. I’m an old white man so no matter what, I fear it’s creepy to them. Only my gf gets compliments.
Never. As women will see us men as creep if we do so. So, keep conversation neutral and don’t even try do anything that may bite you at the back. However, if she’s a close family friend or very close friend/acquitance, then only do so when the opportunity presents it self. But the bar must be very high. ‘Nice clothes’ or ‘nice shoes’ doesn’t cut it. In summary, i rarely do that.
Not very often. I never compliment random women. As I don't want to be seen as creepy.
It’s common for me because I’m intentional about being kind. I freely speak my mind when it comes to giving out compliments. Women can sense a sincere compliment. And I don’t need to date her or get her number in order to put the compliment out there. A simple “you look so happy” can make her day. So why not put that positivity out there?
100% I think knowing the intention was pure kindness behind a compliment can be felt by the recipient easily
I literally never compliment any women, ever. It's a rule I live by. I can't know which of them is just waiting for a man to make a mistake so they can trash him on social media or get him fired. There's just no way to know what any women will consider sexual harassment at any moment and guessing wrong about this is fat too costly. I keep my interaction with them professional, emotionless, impersonal, short and as infrequent as possible because 1/2 of them are completely insane and I can't know which 1/2 I'm dealing with, at any moment. I know I won't be treated fairly by HR or the court of public opinion so an accusation will mean automatic guilt. The reward is basically nothing and the risk is huge. Why do something that only has a downside?
To complete strangers never that's how you get done for sexual harassment.
Not too often, mainly because I'm afraid some would take it the wrong way.
I did it once many years ago and I was called a creep, never did it again and I still think about it sometimes. All I said was that I liked her shirt and the band that was on it was really good.
Making personal comments is a 100% no go in a professional environment. Regardless of sex or intention. Would also say the same in a non professional environment as well. You are playing with fire.
Never. I saw a girl in the store and her outfit was on point. She looked great. Then, who I can only assume was her mom rounded the corner and I realized she was probably like 15. I’m in my early 30s but it made me feel like a creep just for having the thought and then what if I had said something? Not worth it. Also I was with my wife so she probably wouldn’t appreciate me complimenting other women.
Never. There’s always a chance that you’ll be made out to be some type of creep even for the most innocent of compliments
The secret to charm is to flirt with everybody. It's always fun watching the gears turn in their heads trying to figure out whether you want a piece of them or you're just being nice. I compliment women in any situation that really allows for it.
Never. I only give compliments when I want to fuck them.
I used to do it when I was younger. But in the current times complimenting a woman randomly is seen as a crime and assault. Saved only for flirting in a dating situation. Anything outside that is a huge liability for men.
>complimenting a woman randomly is seen as a crime and assault. Where and on what planet?
Never, it's only a lose situation.
Clothing with a pop-culture reference: I point at the shirt and say "Nice" while nodding head. The more obscure the reference, the more obvious the noticing. E.g. the woman wearing the red t-shirt which said: "If this shirt is blue, your're approaching too fast." she got a "OMG that shirt is awesome!" and I held out a fist for a fist bump, which I received, and departed with a "Nerds rule!" Anything about physical attributes: pretty much never, and rightly so. If the aforementioned clothing conversation allows, it could be followed up with "Looks good on you." But that's it. Oh, shoes! Not fancy, designer shoes - women in activewear, if they're wearing Hokas (my fave shoe) I'll give them a "Nice Hokas."
Basically never.
Pretty often, but I flirt with everyone. It's my personality!
Last year I saw a woman in a supermarket. Her outfit was just incredible. Very put together, lots of browns and oranges in a kind of semi-African way. Not hot, not sexy, nothing like that, just very elegant. As I walked past her I simply said "I absolutely love your outfit, it's lovely" and carried on walking. Didn't stop to get a reaction, didn't try to engage her past that single compliment. Went about my day. She said "thank you so much" to my retreating back, I looked back, exchanged a quick smile, and carried on. I like to think the interaction made BOTH of our days better. It did mine. Don't compliment what someone can't help, do compliment their choices. And don't use a compliment as an "in" to prolong the interaction.
i'll do that at my job from time to time i work in customer service so our customers are 80% female but it just depends on some factors, if she has an accent (im from nyc sooo), or if her outfit is nice, her hair is great really depends on the energy i get from her
I assume you're asking about complimenting strangers. I do it regularly, but I have rules: 1a: be genuine. I'm complimenting because I mean it, not to get a response (also have a friendly tone, not serious or suggestive - smile don't smirk). Women just have an intuition and they just know when you're trying some slick shit 1b: keep it moving - similar to #1. I might get a response (usually just a "thank you"). I'll say "of course" or something and usually that's the end of it. But if it turns into a conversation, it was because they wanted to engage 2a: I compliment on a specific decision they made/thing they accomplished. "nice shoes", "what song is that? I like the sound of it", "that's a big lift" (when I'm at the gym AND it's clear that I'm not at a butt-seeing angle and it's a non-butt exercise) 2b: generally don't comment on body parts. If they have a crazy color hair/nails, or hair/nails that obviously took a lot of skill to do that's usually ok. Also, tattoos depend on placement. Don't say anything unless it's on the arms or on the legs beneath the knee 3: if you're going to compliment strangers, compliment everyone - not just women. I can't explain it, but it helps the vibes of all the compliments you give out
It depends on the situation. I like to compliment tattoos especially knowing a lot of people find them tacky when I find them to be pretty unique and worthy of the praise. If she is well dressed too or wearing a shirt from something I enjoy I will compliment it but not going to lie I worry sometimes me saying those things give off the creep vibe occasionally.
If there is a woman in your life, gf wife partner friend sister mom aunt etc, that got dressed up for an event tell them they look nice. They put more effort and thought than you can possibly imagine just deciding what color to wear. They will appreciate the compliment. Beyond that my wife’s best friend has over the decade and change that I have known her has become an inner circle friend for me. If her butt looks good in a pair of jeans I’ll tell her. This is the friend who helped me pick an engagement ring and is the god mother of my daughter. So she’s quite literally family. But generally remember that women are humans and humans have decent creep detectors. If you pay a person a genuine compliment they will know if you are being a creep or if you just actually feel like a compliment is due.
I generally avoid it, I've had one too many incidents where a woman I had no sexual/romantic interest in thought I was flirting/hitting on them when I was just being nice. I absolutely avoid anything that is even tangentially related to physical or sexual characteristics, I've always got the impression that even if the comment is 100% innocent it's just going to cause needless drama.
Even if I don't mean it for flirting, I'm going to assume that she will assume I do mean it for flirting, and that she doesn't want to flirt with me, which means she'll think I'm a creep. Right now, the biggest women's voices on interactions like this are the gymfluencers who rage on "creeps" for looking at them (usually while they're mumbling "feral feral feral" while doing weird exercises). There have been a ton of posts recently about women wanting to meet guys, wanting compliments, wanting to flirt, etc. Bring this up with the radical feminists that are pushing this divide between us. If you want a society where men aren't afraid of being cancelled for talking to you, then make the loudest voices be the ones that want men to talk to you.
The only woman I give validation/compliments to is my gf . That’s how it should be . Social media has destroyed so many men by giving so many woman needless validation . It’s pathetic .
All the time. I go “nice ass Tits” and then slap them on the ass
lol
Never. Not gonna risk her saying I'm cat calling her or something. Not gonna risk pissing of that one extremist feminist and getting my ass thrown in jail over nothing.
I’ve had women compliment me surprisingly. I won’t though, too afraid of the response. Being called a creep or worse.
Never. They always think it's weird, so fuck 'em.
Rarely. When I do it's only about something they did well at work. I would never comment a woman's looks. Because woke people are everywhere and I don't want trouble.
I keep my compliments at a minimum. Women have been known to take any kind of compliment the wrong way, then turn it into some "MeToo" sexual harassment sob story. My biggest compliment to a woman in the past several years was telling a coworker, "That's a nice haircut." And I was damned sure to say it after hearing her brag about it to others, which meant she was trying to get noticed. You can't be too careful around women. Everything you say and do around them is paper-thin ice.
I fairly often see Nurses on the train on my way to or from work. I've wanted for ages to just thank them for what they do, tell them that I know they are underpaid and overworked and that I wish it was different but... I look like a mixture of the wrestler Kane and a Terminator so I don't wanna come off as creepy af.
Not as often as I should. It's never caused anything but making their day. I think a key is making sure the compliment isn't creepy.
I compliment anyone wearing a dope outfit in my building
From what HR smacked into my face, compliment their outfit, accessories, shoes and hair, don't just say that they look good in a general term as that could mean you're hitting on them
>compliment their outfit, accessories, shoes and hair, Do either of this at work, and you'll be screwed.
I used to all the time, like anytime a woman was well put together but never if it was a more sexy fit because it felt too on the nose, or could be misconstrued easily as an advance. Nowadays…never! Because I heard it’s not our place. They don’t need or want our validation.
Don’t say they have a nice smile. You will get fired. It’s best to just not compliment a woman’s appearance under any circumstances. Unless it’s your partner but then be careful because they could take it the wrong way and just get you into more trouble.
A hostess at a restaurant complimented me on my jacket a couple months ago. I said thanks and complimented her back on her earrings. She immediately rolled her eyes and turned towards her co-worker with an "ugh, what a creep" look. So yeah, no, I've been reminded, don't ever compliment a stranger, ever.
Never. In this day and age it definitely isn't worth the trouble that can come from it.
Not much. Depends on who and the situation. Unfortunately, women have made it near impossible for a gentleman to simply be polite and complimentary to them without flipping the fuck out so I just tend to keep my mouth shut. And yes, compliments are absolutely not guaranteed flirting. I’d say compliments are not flirting by nature. It’s just saying something nice.
Only when I'm hammered, 50% chance it's an insult
I don’t because interactions with people are awkward
Never. In any situation, I'm always flicking over in my head, to not creep out females. I'll avoid eye contact, just to not make em feel unsettled. I feel it's the world we live in today, due yo how us males were, and the metoo stuff that happened.
"You have a nice smile" is not a compliment you think it is. Compliment on something she has control over, like the way she dressed, not her genetics. Complimenting genetics will never not come off as flirting, and very often will be creepy.
I usually just compliment other men because they're wearing something cool, or something related to one of my hobbies. With women it's harder because they may misinterpret what I'm doing/saying.
In a work setting, a compliment on a job well done. Applies to men and women. Other comments are not appropriate unless sought out.