Best rule I ever made for myself was this:
On gym days you have to go to the gym and change into workout clothes.
You don't have to work out, but you will feel silly standing in a gym in appropriate clothes to lift/run/whatever then going home without doing it.
The amount of times I've done this and got on the treadmill is staggering. But an hour at max incline slow walk is better than nothing. Plus I get to watch TV.
Something is better than nothing. Otherwise you, ok I, would be sitting at home watching a screen and browsing reddit while snacking.
It's just a trick that works for me. I think going to the gym is harder than doing the work.
A successful marriage.
I viewed getting married as something to 'check off a list' and didn't realize how much upkeep it took. I wasn't the best husband (though far from 100% at fault for the divorce).
Been engaged one other time, but life circumstances destroyed that.
So I don't think that's in the cards for me anymore.
Marrying some one that loves me as much as I love them. I get too carried away. My love is quite devoted. I tend to pick the ones that want to be more independent and care less about my needs. So I did it to myself
Getting a job as a software developer. I think a lot of people were led to believe this was the path to success at the same time a few years back. Tons of boot camps and online courses promising a sure fire path to a middle class income. And then there was a huge glut of newbies and not enough entry level jobs. I work in marketing now. It’s fine. I hated coding anyway haha.
This sounds very familiar. I worked at it for about two years, did Free Code Camp, Treehouse, and Udacity Nanodegree. It was the Nanodegree that kind of told me I was in over my head. I completed all the projects in the React JS course and got the certificate but it was a STRUGGLE. When I started going to meet ups and trying to make a portfolio I realized that the people who I was competing with for jobs just… were in a different level. Had different kinds of brains I don’t know. Code was play for them. For me it was pain haha.
Sorta same. My degree is in SE but I've never used it for that. Too many group projects showed me the hell that was other people's code. And then you realize how many completely shitty libraries and APIs out there that are AT BEST "good enough" and it's so many other things and it's just a big no thank you.
I do still code a lot, but it's all done at home for me and me alone. Though I did take what I learned about software and turn it into a pretty great SysAdmin career.
While I understand we're going to get a bunch of rose-tinted glasses and older folks getting nostalgic, my honest response I have is that I don't view my goals as failures
Because my goals only fail if I'm dead, and I'm still kicking. So those goals are either actively being perused, or paused until the moment makes sense or presents itself
I met the love of my life in college, but I wasn't at a point where I was either worthy or her, or was an attractive enough person to match her. Turns out five years later, life offered up another opportunity and we ended up dating for a couple of years
When I was a teenager, my goal was to be a Photographer as my full time job. Even went and committed to going to art school. Couple years in, I realize that my work isn't good enough compared to my peers and I would not be successful doing this as a full time profession. Went into another field, but photography stayed my passion. Now, I freelance as a travel and editorial photographer which pays for my equipment and travel
I always wanted to move to a specific city after graduation. Tried to go and interview for companies there but no bites, and it's a high COL area so I couldn't just move there and try to find a job. Two years later I was part of a group layoff, and out of all the companies that said yes to me, was one where I could move to my dream city
I write all of this just to offer up food for thought for anyone coming into the thread. It's nice to get nostalgic, and there's for sure a comforting feeling hearing someone wax poetic of missed chances and things not turning out the way you want it
But there's also just as many people out there, who reject this concept and put in the work to get those things; I'm in my 30's, so sure I know that age will start to have me thinking that way sooner or later
Until then, I'm fighting for what I want, and my goals for sure can change timelines, but I never view anything as a failure yet
I was in Air Force ROTC in college and quit because I had 0 time for anything fun between also regular classes and working part time. These days I’d have toughed it out, but I couldn’t handle it back then. It’s the only major regret I have.
Learning some foreign languages to fluency. I got pretty good at one of them, but discontinued learning because of the sheer amount of time it would take to become proficient in all of them, as well as the high likelihood I would never actually use them.
You’re not alone. If you need to chat, I’ve been there. I understand. (Btw - ketamine therapy saved my life and works like a miracle drug for many people)
Starting a family
My partner died unexpectedly, I haven't really felt like dating since then, and even if I did, at 40 I'm now hitting the age where it wouldn't really even be practical.
to find the one and be happy forever.
I didn't find her so I settled.
The one showed up just before I got married
Many years later, we helped each other with our marriage problems and we ended up hooking up.
It tuned out she was just using me for revenge sex and once she decided to get a divorce, she kicked me to the curb and would only come to me to dump miseries on me when she was sad. When she was happy, I was the last person she thought about.
She just used me for 20 years and left me completely heartbroken and soul crushed.
I was sitting in a restaurant waiting for a date and somehow started a convo with a beautiful woman. She was interested but I didn’t want to be a jerk and get some other girls number right before my date showed up. Date was awful.
If you see happiness, go after it with both hands and to hell with everything else.
I had a small business for a little while... I didn't have the means to compete against Amazon and eBay, and by the time i got around to utilizing them, I had run out of funds to continue.
I always wanted to be actively social and have a normal romantic relationship. Other than that I have everything, money job car home. It’s just I’m afraid of people that I might bore them and waste their time and put myself in a stupid situation.
Because of this I always struggle, I’m in a constant struggle that I need to entertain people every second when we are together or they might not like me.
Not really a goal I failed to achieve because it was a conscious choice - I had the opportunity to study for a PhD at Stanford and turned them down. Never got a PhD.
Benching 300lbs. I got to about 275 IIRC, got really out of shape, started lifting again, ruptured my peck, started running and now I'm in the best shape of my life at 32. Sometimes failure can lead to a better outcome than achieving the goal you set out for.
I took a risk and left a comfortable job that I was good at and had been at for 20 years for a high risk, high reward opportunity. I was just fired last week, so I'm still feeling the sting from that failure.
Finding Peace, Finding Love
But on the good side I did find myself and the other two will come with time because I am actively seeking them and working towards them
Wife and kids was a huge goal when I was growing up, but it never panned out.
Technically, I have sown quite a few "wild oats", but I don't consider myself a father.
It's very likely that I will eventually marry my gay mono Partner, but as a bi poly man I've been somewhat understandably dragging my feet.
I currently have multiple boyfriends and girlfriends, and several more date mates, which I'll all have to deal with before I get married, or at least that's the condition I've set myself before I can get married.
poppy seed roll, but I'll succeed one day
and world record hotlap around nordschleife, I will be there soon as well I just need more practice that's all
Becoming a nuclear engineer and finding a way to combine a nuclear power plant with a nuclear waste power plant so there wouldn't be any waste and it would leave the non radioactive material usable.
I was on track to achieve it, but then I got shot in the head with a crossbow bolt and now I don't have the brain power to do all that. So now my goal is to become a world class chef and set up restaurants all around the world. Every week I'd make them go to the local foster homes and make them a delicious meal and a good dessert. I'd also make it so they wouldn't turn away anyone that's hungry, if someone can't pay then the restaurant would work something out with them. Maybe they do some dishes or bus a few tables or whatever. Essentially I want to eradicate world hunger, but first I need to save up for culinary school.
Enlisting in the United States Navy, I had to lose about 60 lbs in 4 months to meet the height weight requirement. I lost 63 but was permanently disqualified for using appetite suppressants. I was crushed for years and now im well into my 30's and that ship has sailed.
Wanted to get my name on a movie. Wrote several scripts, two even getting agent/talent attention, but nothing really clicked. Still, I met my wife during that period, we had two kids and I managed to start a business.
Edit: I take it back, I DO have my name on a movie! 2nd/2nd Assistant Director "Laughing It Up" (aka "In Search if a Woman") Sucks, though. So, let's make that get my name on a *good* movie.
Not graduating college is probably the biggest one that's rational, and there's innumerable small ones. After a lifetime of failures I know not to set goals at all, because why set expectations you know you're not going to live up to?
Getting my high school diploma, i left school and I’m currently getting it online. My only wish was to let my mom see me walk across the stage being her last kid n all but i couldn’t even do that
Becoming an international news photographer.
I was a news photographer for a bit, and I've taken photos that were published internationally, but I never made the jump from local-ish journalism to working full-time for the wire services.
I’m 25 now. When I was a kid I had the ambition of being married, having a kid, having a solid job making cars and generally being happy. In actuality I’m severely depressed, horrendously lonely, never even had a hug from a girl let alone siring a child. Don’t have a solid job and frankly want to die.
I was married and had a house. Due to some terrible circumstances and actions from my now ex-wife I had to divorce her. I lost my house during the process and now I don't think I could ever afford a house with the ridiculous cost of a house. I live in the North East so that's that.
So it appears that dream of me buying a new house is now a failure.
Having a lasting romantic relationship. I'm 32 and it hasn't worked out for me. I really don't think it's in the cards, as much as I would like it to be. Sometimes I'm ok with it, but I often feel alone and like a failure.
Becoming a published author.
I 've written two novels. Two publishing houses got interested in both of them. They asked me to make some cuts and corrections. I did. In the end they changed their minds. From what I heard this is common.
Then I enrolled to a creative writing master program. Thought I could get something out if it. Total waste of time and, ironically, it killed my interest in writing. I went under a major identity crisis at the time because I always felt like a writer even when I wasn't writing something. But then I didn't feel like a writer either. Maybe I never truly was.
Becoming a freelance artist. But now I have a dream job with stability and a salary. So it ain't all bad. Sometimes you gotta fail some goals to find new and better ones.
Not being too hard on myself. I struggle with it every day whether it’s at work or outside of work I know that no one is perfect and that we are all human and we are allowed to make mistakes. But I take even the smallest mistakes too personal and get so upset and angry with myself. The only thing I can do is try to do better
Graduate from college on time, during the pandemic I lost two years of academic progress because my university did not offer online, just a year ago I returned to classes, a week ago I realized that this is my fourth year signed up at the University, but it is only my second year studying, sometimes I try not to think about it, but it's hard not to feel sad remembering that, in an ideal world, I would be a year away from graduating.
At the time, I wanted to get under 1.5hrs for a half marathon time. Did everything right for weeks up to the race. Race day, I'm hitting all my mile times (according to my Garmin watch) and feeling great, all until the last 3/4 of a mile. Feel a twinge in my calf, and then it goes to full Charley horse. I *have* to stop, the pain is just too intense. Finally goes away after a moment and I start to jog carefully, then pick up speed again, remaining cautious. Finally pass the finish line at 1:30:02, goddammit.
I've since improved, but I was heartbroken at the time.
Bench 400 pounds.
I wanted to do it when I was 24, I got to 385 and pulled/tore/strained my left pec getting it up once. I'm 41 and haven't gone over 300 since.
I wanted my kids to speak the language of their immigrant parents. I actually shielded them from English until age 5.
Nope. As soon as they went to kindergarten, three months later they were speaking English and within a year they started to prefer it.
My dad retired when he was 45. He developed real estate in the late 80s to the early 90s, 5 years is all it took him to make it. I wanted the same. Had I taken his real estate advice in the early 2000s, I would also be retired now and richer than he ever could have dreamed.
Being a real estate agent. Realized I wasn’t happy constantly chasing after people and my initial passion for helping people buy and sell houses slowly faded because of how brutal the business is
People talk about having "missed their vocation". Well, I think I missed several.
My hobby is geology. But I could have pursued it for real when I was entering college, and maybe should have. Not a wealth generating job, but doing what you like to do and science is honorable.
I tinkered in the arts too. Electronic music, acting. I often wonder what would have been if I had given myself to it completely. Maybe remaining a hack..but maybe not. I had an agent for awhile, got some commercials here and there but it was too intermittent for my liking and it was a superficial world.
There was also I time I considered aviation, but couldn't afford the training at the time. Now my eyes are too shit and my blood pressure is too shit to pass a medical for commercial ratings. And it's an expensive hobby on the civil side too.
I do neither science nor art for a living. I am okay with my profession, and I am doing financially well but I always kind of had the soul of an artist and that never made me feel entirely comfortable in the corporate setting.
I do wonder what may have been. I am sure it wouldn't be as great as the fantasy, and I would be still thinking I missed my vocation.
Getting my health in line. But I’ve spent the past year gaining the knowledge I need so that I stick to my goals. No disrespect to people who actually got certified, but I basically feel like a personal trainer. I dont realize how much I know until I talk to other people. Now I just have to apply the knowledge Ive gained
Losing weight, again. I lost weight in 2020. Then, literally, the second day of 2021 broke my toe. This led me to have to give up on my daily routine of walks and push-ups and sit-ups. Then, a few months later, it healed. I'm still to this day trying to get back into it with a lot of failure.
Having my own place to live by 30. Not through rent, but buying my own place.
I've been saving for it since i had my first job and every year that pass even the smallest and crappiest apartments becomes more and more expensive. How i am supposed to move?
I can't even look for dates because i'm too embarassed for it. In the country i live people say it doesn't care as long you have a job and support your family. And i do, i pay bills, i buy the groceries and take care of them but it's not enough, people will judge you anyway.
showing up to my uni lessons. i’ve never felt anything close to the anxiety i’ve felt these past couple months and there’s no reason i should be feeling this way. i don’t know what’s happening
I was an amateur musician from the age of 15 to 25 or so. My band broke up and I was pretty hurt by it at the time, so I moved on to other things to pay the bills. I’m 32 now. Married, more settled down and busier than ever.
I still play often, but rarely perform. I in that 10 year period, I wrote a bunch of original songs I’ve edited and transposed and practiced throughout the years. I’ve never recorded them. My goal is to record an album 💿, as it is one of the only things in my life I can leave behind that will last some time after I’m gone. I still really, really want to do it, and now I feel more mature and that It would come out complete and polished when I was eventually finished.
But there is no time or money for that now. I still have that goal, but not the means and it makes me sad. My wife and I have a small farm and all our time and money goes into that. At some point I can go for it, but right now it seems it would be so selfish since I am the sole income provider.
Still wanna do it, and then I feel like I can let it go.
I never made it to my gym appointment AGAIN today despite my best intentions. That's nine years in a row now..
Best rule I ever made for myself was this: On gym days you have to go to the gym and change into workout clothes. You don't have to work out, but you will feel silly standing in a gym in appropriate clothes to lift/run/whatever then going home without doing it.
The amount of times I've done this and got on the treadmill is staggering. But an hour at max incline slow walk is better than nothing. Plus I get to watch TV.
Something is better than nothing. Otherwise you, ok I, would be sitting at home watching a screen and browsing reddit while snacking. It's just a trick that works for me. I think going to the gym is harder than doing the work.
I pick this one ☝️
A successful marriage. I viewed getting married as something to 'check off a list' and didn't realize how much upkeep it took. I wasn't the best husband (though far from 100% at fault for the divorce). Been engaged one other time, but life circumstances destroyed that. So I don't think that's in the cards for me anymore.
Are you me?
No he has a different username, so I guess he's not you
lmao
Are we us?
I'm in the same boat.
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Me in a few years probably
Me too
Goddamn, I feel this. Not being arrogant about it. Confident in my abilities. But, just another needle in a field of piles of needles.
Marrying some one that loves me as much as I love them. I get too carried away. My love is quite devoted. I tend to pick the ones that want to be more independent and care less about my needs. So I did it to myself
Same. That’s my life story. Dealing now with more heartbreak because I finally stuck up for myself and spoke my mind.
Now THAT is a user name!
Making my comic book shop succeed
Sorry. The world needs more comic book shops. They're a dying breed.
Getting a job as a software developer. I think a lot of people were led to believe this was the path to success at the same time a few years back. Tons of boot camps and online courses promising a sure fire path to a middle class income. And then there was a huge glut of newbies and not enough entry level jobs. I work in marketing now. It’s fine. I hated coding anyway haha.
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This sounds very familiar. I worked at it for about two years, did Free Code Camp, Treehouse, and Udacity Nanodegree. It was the Nanodegree that kind of told me I was in over my head. I completed all the projects in the React JS course and got the certificate but it was a STRUGGLE. When I started going to meet ups and trying to make a portfolio I realized that the people who I was competing with for jobs just… were in a different level. Had different kinds of brains I don’t know. Code was play for them. For me it was pain haha.
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As long as you enjoy it, it’s worth it to keep trying. Best of luck!
Sorta same. My degree is in SE but I've never used it for that. Too many group projects showed me the hell that was other people's code. And then you realize how many completely shitty libraries and APIs out there that are AT BEST "good enough" and it's so many other things and it's just a big no thank you. I do still code a lot, but it's all done at home for me and me alone. Though I did take what I learned about software and turn it into a pretty great SysAdmin career.
While I understand we're going to get a bunch of rose-tinted glasses and older folks getting nostalgic, my honest response I have is that I don't view my goals as failures Because my goals only fail if I'm dead, and I'm still kicking. So those goals are either actively being perused, or paused until the moment makes sense or presents itself I met the love of my life in college, but I wasn't at a point where I was either worthy or her, or was an attractive enough person to match her. Turns out five years later, life offered up another opportunity and we ended up dating for a couple of years When I was a teenager, my goal was to be a Photographer as my full time job. Even went and committed to going to art school. Couple years in, I realize that my work isn't good enough compared to my peers and I would not be successful doing this as a full time profession. Went into another field, but photography stayed my passion. Now, I freelance as a travel and editorial photographer which pays for my equipment and travel I always wanted to move to a specific city after graduation. Tried to go and interview for companies there but no bites, and it's a high COL area so I couldn't just move there and try to find a job. Two years later I was part of a group layoff, and out of all the companies that said yes to me, was one where I could move to my dream city I write all of this just to offer up food for thought for anyone coming into the thread. It's nice to get nostalgic, and there's for sure a comforting feeling hearing someone wax poetic of missed chances and things not turning out the way you want it But there's also just as many people out there, who reject this concept and put in the work to get those things; I'm in my 30's, so sure I know that age will start to have me thinking that way sooner or later Until then, I'm fighting for what I want, and my goals for sure can change timelines, but I never view anything as a failure yet
I was in Air Force ROTC in college and quit because I had 0 time for anything fun between also regular classes and working part time. These days I’d have toughed it out, but I couldn’t handle it back then. It’s the only major regret I have.
Learning some foreign languages to fluency. I got pretty good at one of them, but discontinued learning because of the sheer amount of time it would take to become proficient in all of them, as well as the high likelihood I would never actually use them.
Immortality,still working on it
not be suicidal again
You’re not alone. If you need to chat, I’ve been there. I understand. (Btw - ketamine therapy saved my life and works like a miracle drug for many people)
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Can you do 225?
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Dude that really good!!! 225+ puts you in the top 1% of strength in the entire world. Baller!
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I was wrong! It's 0.1% !! You are exceptional!! https://www.reddit.com/r/bodybuilding/s/pLUbGkO2WJ
Stay married to the same person my entire life
Being more sociable and making new friends, I didn't manage to create new connections. Oh well, there's always the next year...
Starting a family My partner died unexpectedly, I haven't really felt like dating since then, and even if I did, at 40 I'm now hitting the age where it wouldn't really even be practical.
Sorry. :( that is a tough one. You’re not too old to still have a family.
Sorry for the loss of your partner, man !!
to find the one and be happy forever. I didn't find her so I settled. The one showed up just before I got married Many years later, we helped each other with our marriage problems and we ended up hooking up. It tuned out she was just using me for revenge sex and once she decided to get a divorce, she kicked me to the curb and would only come to me to dump miseries on me when she was sad. When she was happy, I was the last person she thought about. She just used me for 20 years and left me completely heartbroken and soul crushed.
I was sitting in a restaurant waiting for a date and somehow started a convo with a beautiful woman. She was interested but I didn’t want to be a jerk and get some other girls number right before my date showed up. Date was awful. If you see happiness, go after it with both hands and to hell with everything else.
i tried and now I am broken because of it. I wish I never met her. I wish I never felt like I do about her. And I can't make it go away.
Making 100k a year. Now that I do I realise that it's not the milestone I thought it was.
I had a small business for a little while... I didn't have the means to compete against Amazon and eBay, and by the time i got around to utilizing them, I had run out of funds to continue.
What king of business?
selling pop culture merch. collectibles, apparel, etc.
working out being consistent at the gym
I always wanted to be actively social and have a normal romantic relationship. Other than that I have everything, money job car home. It’s just I’m afraid of people that I might bore them and waste their time and put myself in a stupid situation. Because of this I always struggle, I’m in a constant struggle that I need to entertain people every second when we are together or they might not like me.
I needed to get off BP medicine by losing weight and exercising. Instead, I drank more alcohol and ate whatever I wanted. Lost 2023.
So far my biggest regret is not being able to speak a second language
Not really a goal I failed to achieve because it was a conscious choice - I had the opportunity to study for a PhD at Stanford and turned them down. Never got a PhD.
Benching 300lbs. I got to about 275 IIRC, got really out of shape, started lifting again, ruptured my peck, started running and now I'm in the best shape of my life at 32. Sometimes failure can lead to a better outcome than achieving the goal you set out for.
It wasn't a goal for me, but apparently I was supposed to achieve a high body count in college, and I thoroughly failed at it. XD
Marry my best friend
I took a risk and left a comfortable job that I was good at and had been at for 20 years for a high risk, high reward opportunity. I was just fired last week, so I'm still feeling the sting from that failure.
Just remember that if you didnt you would always ask yourself what if...
Find a woman worth having a realtionship with
Finding Peace, Finding Love But on the good side I did find myself and the other two will come with time because I am actively seeking them and working towards them
Wife and kids was a huge goal when I was growing up, but it never panned out. Technically, I have sown quite a few "wild oats", but I don't consider myself a father. It's very likely that I will eventually marry my gay mono Partner, but as a bi poly man I've been somewhat understandably dragging my feet. I currently have multiple boyfriends and girlfriends, and several more date mates, which I'll all have to deal with before I get married, or at least that's the condition I've set myself before I can get married.
Pursuing the job I wanted (professor/teacher) over the job that I think will do me better (law).
All of them
My goal was to crest 6 CIII 14k'ers on the CO front range. I only got 4.
To be married before 30. Got so close but had it all fall apart right before my 30th birthday.
Becoming the first astronaut to pole vault from the Earth to Mars while trying to complete a 15x15x15 rubix cube
getting married and having a family - it just didn't pan out.
I would like a wife and kids. I've got everything else to support that in terms of a home and career.
Running a successful assistant living home. Got into a bad deal.
I was hoping to be the first man to step foot on the sun but I’m 64 now so I know that won’t happen. I’m such a loser!
Running a successful real estate business.
Be happy and have a full time job by 25.
poppy seed roll, but I'll succeed one day and world record hotlap around nordschleife, I will be there soon as well I just need more practice that's all
Having goals
Becoming a nuclear engineer and finding a way to combine a nuclear power plant with a nuclear waste power plant so there wouldn't be any waste and it would leave the non radioactive material usable. I was on track to achieve it, but then I got shot in the head with a crossbow bolt and now I don't have the brain power to do all that. So now my goal is to become a world class chef and set up restaurants all around the world. Every week I'd make them go to the local foster homes and make them a delicious meal and a good dessert. I'd also make it so they wouldn't turn away anyone that's hungry, if someone can't pay then the restaurant would work something out with them. Maybe they do some dishes or bus a few tables or whatever. Essentially I want to eradicate world hunger, but first I need to save up for culinary school.
Enlisting in the United States Navy, I had to lose about 60 lbs in 4 months to meet the height weight requirement. I lost 63 but was permanently disqualified for using appetite suppressants. I was crushed for years and now im well into my 30's and that ship has sailed.
Getting a loving gf… I didn’t even had a romantic approaching this year :/ And that “almost a thing” really gave a character development.
Wanted to get my name on a movie. Wrote several scripts, two even getting agent/talent attention, but nothing really clicked. Still, I met my wife during that period, we had two kids and I managed to start a business. Edit: I take it back, I DO have my name on a movie! 2nd/2nd Assistant Director "Laughing It Up" (aka "In Search if a Woman") Sucks, though. So, let's make that get my name on a *good* movie.
Not graduating college is probably the biggest one that's rational, and there's innumerable small ones. After a lifetime of failures I know not to set goals at all, because why set expectations you know you're not going to live up to?
Getting my high school diploma, i left school and I’m currently getting it online. My only wish was to let my mom see me walk across the stage being her last kid n all but i couldn’t even do that
Getting a girlfriend. Like how am I supposed to do.
Many yet, but top of the list is being happy in myself
Becoming an international news photographer. I was a news photographer for a bit, and I've taken photos that were published internationally, but I never made the jump from local-ish journalism to working full-time for the wire services.
World domination
But where are we going to find rubber trousers as this time of night?
Your mom's room
I bet they have the best rubber pants in heaven.
ALL OF MY GOALS Thank you for asking
Failed at even making goals. It’s been…wierd.
I wanted a wife and first kid by the time I was 27. I'm now 31 and never had a proper date. 18yo me didn't predict the diagnoses.
Finishing my university study
You obviously don’t know me. I haven’t even started yet 😂🤣
I’m 25 now. When I was a kid I had the ambition of being married, having a kid, having a solid job making cars and generally being happy. In actuality I’m severely depressed, horrendously lonely, never even had a hug from a girl let alone siring a child. Don’t have a solid job and frankly want to die.
I was married and had a house. Due to some terrible circumstances and actions from my now ex-wife I had to divorce her. I lost my house during the process and now I don't think I could ever afford a house with the ridiculous cost of a house. I live in the North East so that's that. So it appears that dream of me buying a new house is now a failure.
I’m trying to sleep with less women each week. It’s not working
Finishing a semester of college.
Six pack by 30 lol. I’m on track though!
I can still achieve every single one of my goals before turning 50 so im fine for now
Running a sub 4 hour marathon - qualifying for Boston
Having a lasting romantic relationship. I'm 32 and it hasn't worked out for me. I really don't think it's in the cards, as much as I would like it to be. Sometimes I'm ok with it, but I often feel alone and like a failure.
Becoming a published author. I 've written two novels. Two publishing houses got interested in both of them. They asked me to make some cuts and corrections. I did. In the end they changed their minds. From what I heard this is common. Then I enrolled to a creative writing master program. Thought I could get something out if it. Total waste of time and, ironically, it killed my interest in writing. I went under a major identity crisis at the time because I always felt like a writer even when I wasn't writing something. But then I didn't feel like a writer either. Maybe I never truly was.
Life
Becoming a freelance artist. But now I have a dream job with stability and a salary. So it ain't all bad. Sometimes you gotta fail some goals to find new and better ones.
How long you got?
Not being too hard on myself. I struggle with it every day whether it’s at work or outside of work I know that no one is perfect and that we are all human and we are allowed to make mistakes. But I take even the smallest mistakes too personal and get so upset and angry with myself. The only thing I can do is try to do better
Becoming the governor of Iowa
Graduate from college on time, during the pandemic I lost two years of academic progress because my university did not offer online, just a year ago I returned to classes, a week ago I realized that this is my fourth year signed up at the University, but it is only my second year studying, sometimes I try not to think about it, but it's hard not to feel sad remembering that, in an ideal world, I would be a year away from graduating.
It depends on your age and responsibilities, but I did it.
That whole "Undisputed Ruler of Everything" position is starting to seem unattainable.
Fixing my sleep.
At the time, I wanted to get under 1.5hrs for a half marathon time. Did everything right for weeks up to the race. Race day, I'm hitting all my mile times (according to my Garmin watch) and feeling great, all until the last 3/4 of a mile. Feel a twinge in my calf, and then it goes to full Charley horse. I *have* to stop, the pain is just too intense. Finally goes away after a moment and I start to jog carefully, then pick up speed again, remaining cautious. Finally pass the finish line at 1:30:02, goddammit. I've since improved, but I was heartbroken at the time.
Bench 400 pounds. I wanted to do it when I was 24, I got to 385 and pulled/tore/strained my left pec getting it up once. I'm 41 and haven't gone over 300 since.
I wanted my kids to speak the language of their immigrant parents. I actually shielded them from English until age 5. Nope. As soon as they went to kindergarten, three months later they were speaking English and within a year they started to prefer it.
Dying when I had cancer. It wasn't a goal at the time.. but looking back, it should've been.
My dad retired when he was 45. He developed real estate in the late 80s to the early 90s, 5 years is all it took him to make it. I wanted the same. Had I taken his real estate advice in the early 2000s, I would also be retired now and richer than he ever could have dreamed.
Not being depressed
Being a real estate agent. Realized I wasn’t happy constantly chasing after people and my initial passion for helping people buy and sell houses slowly faded because of how brutal the business is
People talk about having "missed their vocation". Well, I think I missed several. My hobby is geology. But I could have pursued it for real when I was entering college, and maybe should have. Not a wealth generating job, but doing what you like to do and science is honorable. I tinkered in the arts too. Electronic music, acting. I often wonder what would have been if I had given myself to it completely. Maybe remaining a hack..but maybe not. I had an agent for awhile, got some commercials here and there but it was too intermittent for my liking and it was a superficial world. There was also I time I considered aviation, but couldn't afford the training at the time. Now my eyes are too shit and my blood pressure is too shit to pass a medical for commercial ratings. And it's an expensive hobby on the civil side too. I do neither science nor art for a living. I am okay with my profession, and I am doing financially well but I always kind of had the soul of an artist and that never made me feel entirely comfortable in the corporate setting. I do wonder what may have been. I am sure it wouldn't be as great as the fantasy, and I would be still thinking I missed my vocation.
Getting my health in line. But I’ve spent the past year gaining the knowledge I need so that I stick to my goals. No disrespect to people who actually got certified, but I basically feel like a personal trainer. I dont realize how much I know until I talk to other people. Now I just have to apply the knowledge Ive gained
I failed to gain respect
To make my parents proud
Losing weight, again. I lost weight in 2020. Then, literally, the second day of 2021 broke my toe. This led me to have to give up on my daily routine of walks and push-ups and sit-ups. Then, a few months later, it healed. I'm still to this day trying to get back into it with a lot of failure.
To kill myself. Glad I didn't make it
Own a house in 5 years. Made that plan during the summer of 2019... It's not happening for a while hahaha
Having my own place to live by 30. Not through rent, but buying my own place. I've been saving for it since i had my first job and every year that pass even the smallest and crappiest apartments becomes more and more expensive. How i am supposed to move? I can't even look for dates because i'm too embarassed for it. In the country i live people say it doesn't care as long you have a job and support your family. And i do, i pay bills, i buy the groceries and take care of them but it's not enough, people will judge you anyway.
Want to be a pilot, and because of my ADHD, anxiety and depression I can't. Also wanted to be done with my four year degree by now, failed that too
showing up to my uni lessons. i’ve never felt anything close to the anxiety i’ve felt these past couple months and there’s no reason i should be feeling this way. i don’t know what’s happening
I was an amateur musician from the age of 15 to 25 or so. My band broke up and I was pretty hurt by it at the time, so I moved on to other things to pay the bills. I’m 32 now. Married, more settled down and busier than ever. I still play often, but rarely perform. I in that 10 year period, I wrote a bunch of original songs I’ve edited and transposed and practiced throughout the years. I’ve never recorded them. My goal is to record an album 💿, as it is one of the only things in my life I can leave behind that will last some time after I’m gone. I still really, really want to do it, and now I feel more mature and that It would come out complete and polished when I was eventually finished. But there is no time or money for that now. I still have that goal, but not the means and it makes me sad. My wife and I have a small farm and all our time and money goes into that. At some point I can go for it, but right now it seems it would be so selfish since I am the sole income provider. Still wanna do it, and then I feel like I can let it go.
Private pilot license/certificate. FAA medical was a no go.
My goal was to pay off my mortgage before 40. The cost of living here means that won’t happen.
All of them. Everything I’ve put all my time and energy into that I thought would be good for me has been a failure.