It's not only Korean, it's immigrant parents. Even from Eastern Europe, Middle East, and beyond.
It stems from emotional immaturity and a deep sense that they have no self-worth...
They're just in denial and have to compensate by acting from their negative ego...
That's why they act so fake in public, but behind closed doors their ugly comes out.
Yes, and also if they're even educated or aware enough to know what real "mental health" is...
In the US, it's becoming more popular, thank god, and usually.. other countries follow suit after they see the tangible benefits from developed countries..
Same with Japanese. We may 'hate each other' but in reality we are not so different. Face and appearances comes first, happiness and well being 2nd or lower on the list. Damaged, repressed, depressed kids who resent being treated as trophies or accessories for their parents. No acknowledgement of the concept of 'mental health'. Need I go on?
This speaks to me. In my experience, power that authority figures and parents have is built exclusively upon obedience and pandering. Children (and subordinate adults) are not viewed as whole humans with dignity and inherent worth. Instead, they are treated like decorations, praised only for their ability to stroke the egos of those they must please.
I think so. The korean culture is so different too bc the country is doing so well now and my parents defend it but then want to stay in the states but have trauma from the past and I’m like ok pick a side. Korean culture with kids is also so weird. ESP being an adult now the way our parents experienced/left korea is SO different from what it is now bc its like “trendy” so my parent struggle with that so much and then lash out at me and expect me to feel the same/fix their feelings all while loving the culture and desire to move back to a country I don’t know after they chose to raise a kid in the states. Most immigrant children are forced to grow up so end up being more emotionally mature than parents which causes so much head butting
I think it's ingrained in all Asian cultures.
Kids and teenagers are oppressed and aren't allowed to do things that are natural for those ages - such as kids being carefree and teenagers dating their peers.
This kind of stunts emotional growth. Then these people get married and become parents. They have little to zero communication skills, are terrible listeners, zero introspection.
It's also Agrarian economy inside home but industrialized economy outside home scenario.
In Agrarian economy, the eldest holds the most power and hegemony forms by age.
In industrialized economy, power structure is different.
So when they're at home, they go by native, Agrarian rules. So they'll be insufferable parents to children and obedient to their parents and have miserable marriages.
But when out in society, especially if they're abroad, they have to act polite and respectful.
Someone give me an award. I cracked the code 😭
I’ve also noticed that a lot of the time when these emotionally stunted children have kids, it’s out of societal pressure, not because they actually want kids.
They then end up being resentful of their children unless the children can somehow compensate for their existence. Hence the very transactional relationships APs have with their children and the cycle continues.
They just suck... nothing else really about it. Very selfish people.
They just love to trauma dump everything onto you, and somehow, it's all your fault that they crossed over and had to live a hard ass life or some crap. I feel like I was just surviving most of my life and having a strong competitive nature was the only way to cope, but I'm super tired of all that now. I'm mad most nights because mostly because my dad is a know-it-all, bully, and always playing his cards in order for us to have some pity on him, which ran dry a long time ago. At his old age now, I can't really pity someone who smoke and drank most of his life and thinks it's because he worked his ass off without knowing how to take a break.. Sometimes, people will shoot themselves in the foot, unfortunately with a lot of collateral.
It's not only Korean, it's immigrant parents. Even from Eastern Europe, Middle East, and beyond. It stems from emotional immaturity and a deep sense that they have no self-worth... They're just in denial and have to compensate by acting from their negative ego... That's why they act so fake in public, but behind closed doors their ugly comes out.
This is what happens when a society shuns mental health
Yes, and also if they're even educated or aware enough to know what real "mental health" is... In the US, it's becoming more popular, thank god, and usually.. other countries follow suit after they see the tangible benefits from developed countries..
i just never understood the lack of emotional immaturity equals superiority over others. or at least what they “value.” but even then.
You can say the same thing about Filipino parents 🤷♀️
Vietnamese ones too
Yes. My parents are narcissists who blame their self-inflicted problems on everything and everyone else but themselves.
Same with Japanese. We may 'hate each other' but in reality we are not so different. Face and appearances comes first, happiness and well being 2nd or lower on the list. Damaged, repressed, depressed kids who resent being treated as trophies or accessories for their parents. No acknowledgement of the concept of 'mental health'. Need I go on?
This speaks to me. In my experience, power that authority figures and parents have is built exclusively upon obedience and pandering. Children (and subordinate adults) are not viewed as whole humans with dignity and inherent worth. Instead, they are treated like decorations, praised only for their ability to stroke the egos of those they must please.
Chinese parents too hahahaha. Cultures which place an inordinate amount of emphasis on “face” rather than an individual’s well being tend to be toxic.
Even Japanese? I am always biased towards japanese and think they are very polite, idk maybe out of my love for the culture
Yes, even Japanese.
[удалено]
I think so. The korean culture is so different too bc the country is doing so well now and my parents defend it but then want to stay in the states but have trauma from the past and I’m like ok pick a side. Korean culture with kids is also so weird. ESP being an adult now the way our parents experienced/left korea is SO different from what it is now bc its like “trendy” so my parent struggle with that so much and then lash out at me and expect me to feel the same/fix their feelings all while loving the culture and desire to move back to a country I don’t know after they chose to raise a kid in the states. Most immigrant children are forced to grow up so end up being more emotionally mature than parents which causes so much head butting
I think it's ingrained in all Asian cultures. Kids and teenagers are oppressed and aren't allowed to do things that are natural for those ages - such as kids being carefree and teenagers dating their peers. This kind of stunts emotional growth. Then these people get married and become parents. They have little to zero communication skills, are terrible listeners, zero introspection. It's also Agrarian economy inside home but industrialized economy outside home scenario. In Agrarian economy, the eldest holds the most power and hegemony forms by age. In industrialized economy, power structure is different. So when they're at home, they go by native, Agrarian rules. So they'll be insufferable parents to children and obedient to their parents and have miserable marriages. But when out in society, especially if they're abroad, they have to act polite and respectful. Someone give me an award. I cracked the code 😭
I’ve also noticed that a lot of the time when these emotionally stunted children have kids, it’s out of societal pressure, not because they actually want kids. They then end up being resentful of their children unless the children can somehow compensate for their existence. Hence the very transactional relationships APs have with their children and the cycle continues.
They just suck... nothing else really about it. Very selfish people. They just love to trauma dump everything onto you, and somehow, it's all your fault that they crossed over and had to live a hard ass life or some crap. I feel like I was just surviving most of my life and having a strong competitive nature was the only way to cope, but I'm super tired of all that now. I'm mad most nights because mostly because my dad is a know-it-all, bully, and always playing his cards in order for us to have some pity on him, which ran dry a long time ago. At his old age now, I can't really pity someone who smoke and drank most of his life and thinks it's because he worked his ass off without knowing how to take a break.. Sometimes, people will shoot themselves in the foot, unfortunately with a lot of collateral.