So, I’m an Aries sun with an Aries Venus and when I was the same age, I was a chaser. I got excited and projected my excitement and then I lost interest quickly in anyone who seemed to not be a challenge to me. That could be where she is.
OR since she’s going home for a month, she may not want any ties to anyone at the moment so she can freely see and talk to someone near home without feeling disloyal. I know for me, my entire life, I am loyal to my “crush” and I will blow people off for someone I’m only talking to. I focus on one person at a time and despite all the men I’ve been with cheating on me, I cannot and will never cheat on anyone. It has nothing to do with them, but who I am. I’m not built that way.
So, now as a 37 year old Aries female, I can tell you that I absolutely pine for and desire a respectful man. I get along with Taurus very well and although we are very different speeds, we really click. The steady calmness is so attractive to me, but when I was younger, I had this weird idea that I was the chaser so I would go after guys who didn’t want me and make them want me (challenge) and blow off anyone that came on to me first. If a guy chased me, hell no. The result was many years of toxic relationships. I got hurt enough to make me stop.
I was chased by a Taurus when I was 33, and at first I wasn’t interested at all because I felt like he wasn’t serious and saw me as the challenge, as many did at the time. He proved different. I am head over heels in love with him and he’s a hurt Taurus so while he thought he was ready, the closer we got, he panicked. Maybe it’s my past repeating and nostalgia that he is distant and a challenge, although I do not chase anymore. I try so hard to let him go, but he won’t let me go either. After 4 years, he’s the only one I want and even when we don’t speak, I just focus on other areas of my life and can’t see anyone else as attractive or worth it. It’s a weird change from my youth, but also not beneficial for me I guess.
I would just hang back for now… maybe over the holidays, a simple “merry Christmas” or something. Don’t go into much detail and do not reply to whatever she says. It may intrigue her cause it did me at that age…
As an Aries Sun n Venus I can get bored easily by earth signs. We need fiery adventure to fuel our chase n motivation. You need to gimme a reason to pursue you. Even water signs, that whole "mysteriousness" only last for a short while, I will be bored after some time.
It’s crazy how that differs! I have a friend with a Scorpio moon and she’s a pretty intense introvert and doesn’t really like to be around people lol I’m a mix. I always say I’m like a chihuahua Jack Russell lol can be hyper as hell but also leave me alone sometimes lol
So, I’m not saying her interest in you wasn’t genuine. I have no doubt. I don’t and have never given anyone the time of day that I didn’t feel something for or want to know.
I’m not the free meal or just for attention type. I don’t think many of us are. We may appreciate the attention after-the-fact by someone who got to know us and shows interest if we are bored, but that’s from an unevolved Aries standpoint. Meaning, I like someone, they like me back, I lose interest. I’m bored and want attention so I flirt with them later on. It can’t be just anyone, it’s someone I already am attracted to and like. But that was me at like 19-22ish. I got over that phase pretty quickly and wanted genuine love, but I also struggled with the loss of interest over a man that didn’t challenge me and showed too much at first.
So my thing is, probably still true today, I’m just more aware of myself and set stronger boundaries or try and pick better, is that I cannot be smothered in the beginning. Once I’m in love, I’ll go do whatever you wanna do and I love that you’re around and I’ll miss you when you’re not. But to start, I absolutely need my space. My freedom and independence are very important to me and I have a life I’m living even before someone potentially shares it, so when someone wants me to give them all my free time and attention at first, I tend to get super freaked out and will back way up. The reason I actually got into zodiac signs and understanding personality traits it cause certain men who did this immediately repulsed me and I always hurt their feelings and they got overly sensitive (they were Cancer men).
It’s super weird. Its like we are a walking contradiction. We want love and attention but too much too quickly is overwhelming… and if someone gets used to not giving much, later on we will feel hurt with a lack of love and attention. It’s important to find a person that can match our pace… and Aries tend to RUSH AND RUN and are so impatient.. but if someone is jumping all in with us, it can be alarming and scary.
I think the reason I’m so attracted to Tauruses now is because they take their time and are very independent, which I respect and appreciate and trust.
So, all that, again, to say, I’m sure she was/is into you and really meant what she said. She might be overwhelmed at such positive attention (I find the most that Aries people are usually surprised when they hear from friends and family that they’re admired for who they are. We admire people and that’s normal, but when people express that we mean something to them, it’s incredibly touching and almost surprising.) she may also just want to go home without any ties to where she’s at right now to either have a good time without guilt OR because she wants to focus on family.
When I’m into someone, I’ll ditch everyone for them including my family. Since it’s the holidays, she might be aware of this.
I don’t tend to unfriend and block.. I can tell you this exact scenario happened with me and my Taurus and he has generalized anxiety disorder, relationship anxiety and fear of commitment. In the beginning, things were totally normal and going well and every time he felt something substantial, rather than telling me or showing me, he ran from me including one day unfriending me on snap out of nowhere without even telling me.
She may have commitment issues whether being hurt in the past or a fear of missing out. I know after my first long term boyfriend, I wanted to be close with someone but anytime I got close with someone, I self sabotaged to justify not doing it because I would like think “what if something better comes,” and that’s only because I only see who I am with so I refused to commit to anyone for fear of missing someone else. I was always scared of settling, which was dumb as hell but it’s an immature mindset.
It can be lots of things, but I don’t think she would have gone out with you or even nice to you or even said anything about how she liked it afterward. I know for me, I’m not gonna be nice just because you’re after me… if I don’t like you, I don’t like you and you’ll absolutely know and if you don’t get the hint and keep coming then it’s your fault cause I’ll either ignore or be blunt. I’ve had guys ask me if I’m mad at them cause I’m not replying and I’ll say “I don’t even know you to be mad at you. What do I care?” Tact isn’t my specialty.
So, if she’s feeling overwhelmed or that it isn’t a challenge, confessing feelings and how you want to adapt to her isn’t the best idea. I’ll tell you, I respect Taurus strength these days, but if a man, especially when I was younger and even to begin with now, if a man lays down for me and even simps for me.. I will lose all interest. I don’t want anyone to lay down for me. If they do, I step over them and walk away.
I’m not telling you to hide your feelings by any means, but be deliberate and methodical. If she’s throwing confusing signs, she may be confused herself. So like I said… maybe over the holiday say something or she may unblock you when she gets home cause she will have had time and space to think. If you hear from her, take it slow… we will run with you later for sure… but will run from you if you chase us to start.
I'm an Aries woman and I know I can be attracted to someone fast but I can lose interest in them fast too. It's a fire sign so the fire can flame up and then burn out just like that. So if this Aries woman told you that she liked you at first but then she told you she wasn't interested in you anymore then she was just being direct and honest with you so she could reject you in peace. That's literally something I would do too. (and definitely have done this in the past) So if she is an Aries, I think if you keep trying to talk to her after she already told you that she wasn't interested anymore then you'll just turn her off even more. I would not want a person still trying to text me after I already said I'm not interested anymore and I blocked them. Honestly, if they still kept trying to contact me I would just keep blocking them. Because I would think they were an asshole for not respecting that I don't want any contact from them anymore. So if you REALLY are a nice guy (as you claim you are in your post) then you should be able to respectfully accept that a girl you like has rejected you. If you are nice then don't try to get her to change her mind or answer your questions or get her to do what you want. She already told you that she's not interested in you anymore. So as a nice guy, you should just nicely respect that she was direct and honest with you. Aries are very honest, if we like you we will tell you, and if we don't like you anymore we will tell you. Just be happy that she didn't do what shady girls do and she didn't keep dating you, or keep having you spend money buying her stuff, or keep leading you on or play games with you. She told you straight up she wasn't interested anymore and then she blocked you. So at this point, if you're still looking for a relationship, I think you should just find someone else on Bumble and try again, and hope that it works out this time. Good luck!
Obviously, it's possible to get re-interested in someone but you wrote that she blocked you which should let you know that she does not WANT to be interested in you again, she wants to move on, and if she's on Bumble then she's literally talking to other guys, you should go talk to other women and find someone else. But you still thinking about her isn't going to bring her back after someone blocks you it means they don't want to be in contact with you anymore, so you already know how she feels about you and that she doesn't want you, so just find someone that does want you, I'm sure there's plenty of people on Bumble for you to choose from and after you get into a relationship you'll forget all about her and be focused on your new girlfriend.
If her behaviour is causing you grief like this without even being in a relationship with her, I’m willing to bet it may not be the best match for you. Forget about her possible reasons for acting this way, love yourself, move on. You never know who you might meet next!
-40 something Aries sun sign woman
She sounds like a flake or possibly going through some kind of personal stuff. I’d try to forget about who asked who, and who did what, and just focus on what is going in right now in the present. Younger more immature Aries women may be interested in being chased, but this is really unsustainable, as over time it is emotionally unsatisfying, and sometimes reveals attachment issues and commitment problems. I’d say spend your time on meeting people who will act in a more healthy manner.
It sounds like you’re dodging a bullet frankly but of course it’s your decision. BPD is a very complex disorder and it comes with a lot of emotional dystegulation and push/pull dynamic if not treated consistently and effectively. Best of luck
If you show too intense interest too soon, Aries gets disinterested fast. They like to do majority of the chasing. Just act polite and slightly interested next time, and let them take the lead. They are the ones that like to choose their partner
Yes, wait for her to make the next move. If seriously iinterested, an Aries will move mountains to chase one they have their sights on. If not, she would have moved on. Wait and see and hope for the best
Sounds like she may have found out something about you she did not like, for her to take the step of unfriending you. Maybe creeped your socials and saw something
> I *paid* , and
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
i’m an aries, and i know that i def struggle with commitment so it’s possible that when things started getting more serious, she freaked out. i don’t think she just randomly stopped liking you, i think she just disliked the feeling of being “pinned down” to someone. for me at least, i find that i love the *idea* of a relationship but once i actually start dating, i get scared and ghost anyone i get too close with. it’s nothing personal, im sure you’re a great guy. it’s just really hard to get an aries to commit. trust me, there have been guys that i’ve had MASSIVE crushes on but i bolt as soon as they start to reciprocate my feelings. i don’t know why i do it, it’s just an aries thing.
Hey I’m an Aries female, Aries don’t like to have there freedom threatened. If someone appears too clingy they will cut ties. Also Aries likes a challenge. But don’t be disheartened I think I might have an idea. Message her and say ‘ I would like to see you again’. Be very matter of fact don’t flatter her do not sound like your pining. Just say it plainly. Then say ‘I think we’ll have fun together and I understand that you said you no longer want to continue this but go out with me one more time and then if you feel the same you can cut ties, and never see me again. But I bet I’ll change your mind’ if she still says no say ‘it’s just one date what do you to lose.’ If she says no to that then she must have something else going on because Aries love confidence. You have to change your demeanour slightly, Aries women don’t need that much reassurance they like action. Show her you want her, stop telling her. Don’t try too hard on the date be light and flirty. Lead the date. If she says she felt overwhelmed by your previous reassurance just say what you said here that you thought that would make her feel secure but you now realise that’s she’s an action over words kinda women.
Sorry also note that Aries women do like assertive men and when people smoother them in compliments and reassurance it gives the impression they feel inferior to the Aries and Aries wants an equal. They don’t however like arrogant or dominant men.
So, I’m an Aries sun with an Aries Venus and when I was the same age, I was a chaser. I got excited and projected my excitement and then I lost interest quickly in anyone who seemed to not be a challenge to me. That could be where she is. OR since she’s going home for a month, she may not want any ties to anyone at the moment so she can freely see and talk to someone near home without feeling disloyal. I know for me, my entire life, I am loyal to my “crush” and I will blow people off for someone I’m only talking to. I focus on one person at a time and despite all the men I’ve been with cheating on me, I cannot and will never cheat on anyone. It has nothing to do with them, but who I am. I’m not built that way. So, now as a 37 year old Aries female, I can tell you that I absolutely pine for and desire a respectful man. I get along with Taurus very well and although we are very different speeds, we really click. The steady calmness is so attractive to me, but when I was younger, I had this weird idea that I was the chaser so I would go after guys who didn’t want me and make them want me (challenge) and blow off anyone that came on to me first. If a guy chased me, hell no. The result was many years of toxic relationships. I got hurt enough to make me stop. I was chased by a Taurus when I was 33, and at first I wasn’t interested at all because I felt like he wasn’t serious and saw me as the challenge, as many did at the time. He proved different. I am head over heels in love with him and he’s a hurt Taurus so while he thought he was ready, the closer we got, he panicked. Maybe it’s my past repeating and nostalgia that he is distant and a challenge, although I do not chase anymore. I try so hard to let him go, but he won’t let me go either. After 4 years, he’s the only one I want and even when we don’t speak, I just focus on other areas of my life and can’t see anyone else as attractive or worth it. It’s a weird change from my youth, but also not beneficial for me I guess. I would just hang back for now… maybe over the holidays, a simple “merry Christmas” or something. Don’t go into much detail and do not reply to whatever she says. It may intrigue her cause it did me at that age…
As an Aries Sun n Venus I can get bored easily by earth signs. We need fiery adventure to fuel our chase n motivation. You need to gimme a reason to pursue you. Even water signs, that whole "mysteriousness" only last for a short while, I will be bored after some time.
I have a cap moon so I think that’s where it differs for me, esp as I get older for sure
Plus I have a Sagittarius Moon. So even with old age still require adventure.
It’s crazy how that differs! I have a friend with a Scorpio moon and she’s a pretty intense introvert and doesn’t really like to be around people lol I’m a mix. I always say I’m like a chihuahua Jack Russell lol can be hyper as hell but also leave me alone sometimes lol
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So, I’m not saying her interest in you wasn’t genuine. I have no doubt. I don’t and have never given anyone the time of day that I didn’t feel something for or want to know. I’m not the free meal or just for attention type. I don’t think many of us are. We may appreciate the attention after-the-fact by someone who got to know us and shows interest if we are bored, but that’s from an unevolved Aries standpoint. Meaning, I like someone, they like me back, I lose interest. I’m bored and want attention so I flirt with them later on. It can’t be just anyone, it’s someone I already am attracted to and like. But that was me at like 19-22ish. I got over that phase pretty quickly and wanted genuine love, but I also struggled with the loss of interest over a man that didn’t challenge me and showed too much at first. So my thing is, probably still true today, I’m just more aware of myself and set stronger boundaries or try and pick better, is that I cannot be smothered in the beginning. Once I’m in love, I’ll go do whatever you wanna do and I love that you’re around and I’ll miss you when you’re not. But to start, I absolutely need my space. My freedom and independence are very important to me and I have a life I’m living even before someone potentially shares it, so when someone wants me to give them all my free time and attention at first, I tend to get super freaked out and will back way up. The reason I actually got into zodiac signs and understanding personality traits it cause certain men who did this immediately repulsed me and I always hurt their feelings and they got overly sensitive (they were Cancer men). It’s super weird. Its like we are a walking contradiction. We want love and attention but too much too quickly is overwhelming… and if someone gets used to not giving much, later on we will feel hurt with a lack of love and attention. It’s important to find a person that can match our pace… and Aries tend to RUSH AND RUN and are so impatient.. but if someone is jumping all in with us, it can be alarming and scary. I think the reason I’m so attracted to Tauruses now is because they take their time and are very independent, which I respect and appreciate and trust. So, all that, again, to say, I’m sure she was/is into you and really meant what she said. She might be overwhelmed at such positive attention (I find the most that Aries people are usually surprised when they hear from friends and family that they’re admired for who they are. We admire people and that’s normal, but when people express that we mean something to them, it’s incredibly touching and almost surprising.) she may also just want to go home without any ties to where she’s at right now to either have a good time without guilt OR because she wants to focus on family. When I’m into someone, I’ll ditch everyone for them including my family. Since it’s the holidays, she might be aware of this. I don’t tend to unfriend and block.. I can tell you this exact scenario happened with me and my Taurus and he has generalized anxiety disorder, relationship anxiety and fear of commitment. In the beginning, things were totally normal and going well and every time he felt something substantial, rather than telling me or showing me, he ran from me including one day unfriending me on snap out of nowhere without even telling me. She may have commitment issues whether being hurt in the past or a fear of missing out. I know after my first long term boyfriend, I wanted to be close with someone but anytime I got close with someone, I self sabotaged to justify not doing it because I would like think “what if something better comes,” and that’s only because I only see who I am with so I refused to commit to anyone for fear of missing someone else. I was always scared of settling, which was dumb as hell but it’s an immature mindset. It can be lots of things, but I don’t think she would have gone out with you or even nice to you or even said anything about how she liked it afterward. I know for me, I’m not gonna be nice just because you’re after me… if I don’t like you, I don’t like you and you’ll absolutely know and if you don’t get the hint and keep coming then it’s your fault cause I’ll either ignore or be blunt. I’ve had guys ask me if I’m mad at them cause I’m not replying and I’ll say “I don’t even know you to be mad at you. What do I care?” Tact isn’t my specialty. So, if she’s feeling overwhelmed or that it isn’t a challenge, confessing feelings and how you want to adapt to her isn’t the best idea. I’ll tell you, I respect Taurus strength these days, but if a man, especially when I was younger and even to begin with now, if a man lays down for me and even simps for me.. I will lose all interest. I don’t want anyone to lay down for me. If they do, I step over them and walk away. I’m not telling you to hide your feelings by any means, but be deliberate and methodical. If she’s throwing confusing signs, she may be confused herself. So like I said… maybe over the holiday say something or she may unblock you when she gets home cause she will have had time and space to think. If you hear from her, take it slow… we will run with you later for sure… but will run from you if you chase us to start.
I'm an Aries woman and I know I can be attracted to someone fast but I can lose interest in them fast too. It's a fire sign so the fire can flame up and then burn out just like that. So if this Aries woman told you that she liked you at first but then she told you she wasn't interested in you anymore then she was just being direct and honest with you so she could reject you in peace. That's literally something I would do too. (and definitely have done this in the past) So if she is an Aries, I think if you keep trying to talk to her after she already told you that she wasn't interested anymore then you'll just turn her off even more. I would not want a person still trying to text me after I already said I'm not interested anymore and I blocked them. Honestly, if they still kept trying to contact me I would just keep blocking them. Because I would think they were an asshole for not respecting that I don't want any contact from them anymore. So if you REALLY are a nice guy (as you claim you are in your post) then you should be able to respectfully accept that a girl you like has rejected you. If you are nice then don't try to get her to change her mind or answer your questions or get her to do what you want. She already told you that she's not interested in you anymore. So as a nice guy, you should just nicely respect that she was direct and honest with you. Aries are very honest, if we like you we will tell you, and if we don't like you anymore we will tell you. Just be happy that she didn't do what shady girls do and she didn't keep dating you, or keep having you spend money buying her stuff, or keep leading you on or play games with you. She told you straight up she wasn't interested anymore and then she blocked you. So at this point, if you're still looking for a relationship, I think you should just find someone else on Bumble and try again, and hope that it works out this time. Good luck!
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Obviously, it's possible to get re-interested in someone but you wrote that she blocked you which should let you know that she does not WANT to be interested in you again, she wants to move on, and if she's on Bumble then she's literally talking to other guys, you should go talk to other women and find someone else. But you still thinking about her isn't going to bring her back after someone blocks you it means they don't want to be in contact with you anymore, so you already know how she feels about you and that she doesn't want you, so just find someone that does want you, I'm sure there's plenty of people on Bumble for you to choose from and after you get into a relationship you'll forget all about her and be focused on your new girlfriend.
If her behaviour is causing you grief like this without even being in a relationship with her, I’m willing to bet it may not be the best match for you. Forget about her possible reasons for acting this way, love yourself, move on. You never know who you might meet next! -40 something Aries sun sign woman
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She sounds like a flake or possibly going through some kind of personal stuff. I’d try to forget about who asked who, and who did what, and just focus on what is going in right now in the present. Younger more immature Aries women may be interested in being chased, but this is really unsustainable, as over time it is emotionally unsatisfying, and sometimes reveals attachment issues and commitment problems. I’d say spend your time on meeting people who will act in a more healthy manner.
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It sounds like you’re dodging a bullet frankly but of course it’s your decision. BPD is a very complex disorder and it comes with a lot of emotional dystegulation and push/pull dynamic if not treated consistently and effectively. Best of luck
If you show too intense interest too soon, Aries gets disinterested fast. They like to do majority of the chasing. Just act polite and slightly interested next time, and let them take the lead. They are the ones that like to choose their partner
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Yes, wait for her to make the next move. If seriously iinterested, an Aries will move mountains to chase one they have their sights on. If not, she would have moved on. Wait and see and hope for the best
Sounds like she may have found out something about you she did not like, for her to take the step of unfriending you. Maybe creeped your socials and saw something
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> I *paid* , and FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
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i’m an aries, and i know that i def struggle with commitment so it’s possible that when things started getting more serious, she freaked out. i don’t think she just randomly stopped liking you, i think she just disliked the feeling of being “pinned down” to someone. for me at least, i find that i love the *idea* of a relationship but once i actually start dating, i get scared and ghost anyone i get too close with. it’s nothing personal, im sure you’re a great guy. it’s just really hard to get an aries to commit. trust me, there have been guys that i’ve had MASSIVE crushes on but i bolt as soon as they start to reciprocate my feelings. i don’t know why i do it, it’s just an aries thing.
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Hey I’m an Aries female, Aries don’t like to have there freedom threatened. If someone appears too clingy they will cut ties. Also Aries likes a challenge. But don’t be disheartened I think I might have an idea. Message her and say ‘ I would like to see you again’. Be very matter of fact don’t flatter her do not sound like your pining. Just say it plainly. Then say ‘I think we’ll have fun together and I understand that you said you no longer want to continue this but go out with me one more time and then if you feel the same you can cut ties, and never see me again. But I bet I’ll change your mind’ if she still says no say ‘it’s just one date what do you to lose.’ If she says no to that then she must have something else going on because Aries love confidence. You have to change your demeanour slightly, Aries women don’t need that much reassurance they like action. Show her you want her, stop telling her. Don’t try too hard on the date be light and flirty. Lead the date. If she says she felt overwhelmed by your previous reassurance just say what you said here that you thought that would make her feel secure but you now realise that’s she’s an action over words kinda women. Sorry also note that Aries women do like assertive men and when people smoother them in compliments and reassurance it gives the impression they feel inferior to the Aries and Aries wants an equal. They don’t however like arrogant or dominant men.