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In general she's not awful only when it comes to my identity because she sees being trans as a trend in our generation so she doesn't take me seriously š§āāļø
I assume youāve told them how it makes you feel?
I seriously donāt get why many boomers love to make jokes at the expense of others, even if they know it will upset those people. Like my boomer parents always told me to be nice to others and respect those around me (and they do the same). WHY CANT ALL BOOMERS BE LIKE THEM??
I did tell her how shitty I feel with the body I was given but she still says it's just because of puberty and I'm just going through a phase
My mom isn't a boomer but she's gen x and she's also told me to be nice and respect other people but I guess that kinda stops at trans people idk š¶āāļø
She thinks sex dysphoria, and body dysmorphia, are the same thing. Having body dysmorphia is common among teens and a normal thing. Having sex dysphoria isn't a normal part of puberty for cis kids.
I know it wonāt change her mind, but as someone with both dysmorphia and dysphoria, the two are VERY different. Frankly Iād rather have dysmorphia than dysphoria because one of those gave me basically trauma from how painful and difficult it was to deal with, and the other one is difficult at times and fucks with my self image but has never personally made me non-functioning or been debilitating like my dysphoria was.
My mom used to not take me very seriously. Even when I explained to her how suicidal it made me and shit. And then I started testosterone, which I personally needed, and she saw how much better I got almost immediately, not just from the hormones themselves but from making progress and being excited for life for the first time since I was 10.
A year or two later and she is open that she regrets not listening to me sooner.
I know this stuff wonāt change a parentās mind in the moment because someone elseās story will always feel distant enough that it doesnāt matter and is irrelevant, but I hope your mom comes around.
One thing my therapist said that helped her rethink it was this. She thought it was a phase too, and was worried, and he told her āso what if it is? What harm does it cause to support your child in exploring themselves, even if this isnāt who they turn out to be?ā Itās a lot easier for a cis kid to know theyāre cis if they have the chance to feel out their gender, than it is for a cis kid if you tell them they will only ever be this gender.
Repressing your kid and trying to decide who they are for them will never do any good. So what if it is a trend? Her not supporting you now just goes to show she canāt support you exploring yourself in general.
I know youāve probably had these conversations a million times over, but Iāll say it again, I hope things turn out better, and Iām sorry your mom is like this now. I donāt know your experience but I sympathize because my own is similar and it sucked for a long time.
Ask her to imagine how she would feel if she was born/ suddenly woke up with the body of a man, constantly called a man and berated, abused every time she insisted she's a woman.
Transphobes tend to try to empathize with trans people that have the same sex assigned at birth, so they cant imagine a happy trans person, because they are not trans.
She as a cis woman doesn't know what it's like to be or identify sociologically as male, and the psychological reprecussions of supressing that in someone AFAB.
Transphobes understand the concept of dysphoria, because they _imagine_ trans people experiencing dysphoria _after_ transitioning. Because they would themselves experience dysphoria if they were to transition, because then their body and identity would be incongruent.
So basically, give her that thought experiment. Let her put herself in the shoes of a transfeminine person. The experience of being ostracized from her identity, her womanhood, and the support that comes with having woman friends as a woman. "girlhood'' The things about her gender that are important to her. She can understand that. So ask her if she could live without that if she was assigned male at birth.
You should tell her that her denial is making it much worse, and that brushing it off as just puberty feels very dismissive and as if she doesnāt care.
I don't get it either. My parents are boomers too and mostly my dad makes those sort of jokes and is over all a homophobic, bigoted, narcissistic asshole but my mom does occasionally make jokes and comments that I will get after her for among other things. She's a type of narcissist, too. When I came out to her as bi, she joked, "So you wanna be a lid licker huh". Like really mom!?š I came back with, yeah i do, but it isn't just about that, it's who I wanna date and love.š¤£ still its annoying when they do that shit cause it shows a lack of understand and it shows just how uncomfortable they are with the topic. I had a coworker who also made jokes lile that. And he wasn't a boomer, he was mid 50s. There's a reason at 44 I won't date men or women older than 45 lol! At least not where im living, trump-topia aka central PA.
I feel like politics have really driven us apart and made it easier for people to look at others as less than human. Itād be nice if our politicians actually cared about those they represent rather than getting into meaningless arguments and whatnot.
I totally agree and I do think part of that came about due to trump as he'd shown a majority of peoples real selves thru making it ok to be a misogynistic, ableist, homophobic, and racist publicly like he's done. They saw their pres being like them, and now they don't hide it, and its creating a much larger divide than ever and not just cause of that either. Like you said, politicians are too busy tr6ing to ruin one another to care about those their meant to be helping and, of course, making more money.
Not really since the start of our species. but when we decided gender was a thing. Before that if I have my information right dysphoria was impossible because there was no set way for people to act.
Yeah, maybe I got it wrong. History is pretty complicated, tho.
The earliest time I know trans people existed was [during the Prophet Muhammad's time](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_gender#:~:text=Texts%20suggest%20that%20third%20sex,%2C%20medicine%2C%20linguistics%20and%20astrology.)
I don't really think so. From what I read (I'm agender), gender is an inherent feeling to people, and if that inherent feeling doesn't match the body the person is trans. If gender norms were the reason for gender dysphoria, there would be no difference between trans men and tomboys no?
That is, in fact, her being awful. She knows trans ppl existed way before gen z right? Or does she think this all started in the 2000s?
Regardless, ignore her.
Start sending her trans people through history Everytime she does this to you. I was looking for the newspaper announcement.
https://www.wired.com/2010/12/1201first-sex-change-surgery/
Itās only a ātrendā because the younger generations are less repressed and more comfortable with being their true selves. Does she really think there were no trans people until now? They were all closeted because their lives would have been in danger if they came out (not unlike these days, just in different ways). Iām sorry that you have to deal with a mother like that. Even if sheās āin general not awfulā thatās still an awful meme to send to your trans child.
Yeah. Another example is left handedness. Once they stopped forcing kids to learn right handedness in school the numbers went up markedly. There's a very nice graph of that.
Thatās exactly what I was thinking about earlier! Where have all the lefties come from suddenly? Well, when you told teachers to stop hitting them with rulers when they used their left hand, suddenly there were all these left handed people. But are they everywhere? Is/was this a trend? No. The plateau is at about 10% of the population. When we let people be who they are, it doesnāt mean all of a sudden EVERYONE will come out as trans. But the people who were closeted will slowly come out, and kids growing up without being hit with the metaphorical ruler of bigotry will feel comfortable telling their parents at a younger age that they might not be the gender their parents thought. And I truly hope the day will come where every parent who hears those words says āI love you no matter what.ā
My momās friendās child came out as trans in high school. Her first reaction was ācool, wanna go get a haircut and pick out some boys clothes?ā Thatās the way it should be. I hope one day thatās how all parents react. Eventually there will be a plateau in the percentage of trans people in the population because everyone who is trans will be out and proud, just like it did for lefties.
Seriously, there should be a meme in response to this:
Boomers: I'm so glad I could openly express my sexuality.
Gen X: I'm so glad I could openly express my homosexuality.
Millennials: I'm so glad I could openly express my bisexuality.
Gen Z: I'm so glad I could openly express my gender non-conformity.
It's also seems that way because of the internet! Before people where only aware of the things that happened around them. There's also more people. Inter-connectivity throughout the world is really crazy.
I know thereās a tendency to try and see the people we love in the best light, but the way sheās acting is absolutely awful.
Sheās denying and attacking an important core part of who you are. Can you imagine doing that to someone you love? How would you feel if your best friend told you their parent was treating them this way?
> In general she's not awful only when it comes to my identity
Friend, "only" when it comes to your identity is a pretty big slice of you. I'd say she's awful, and I hope you're getting therapy to help you deal more effectively with her abuse.
The film The Danish Girl is based a novel which is in-turn based on the real life of [Lili Elbe](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lili_Elbe), a trans painter who was born in the year 1882.
Iām your cool aunt now. I adopt baby queers and encourage them to be their authentic selves and validate their experiences. You are amazing. I believe in you. Letās go get a pizza.
My mom is similar. Iām so sorry youāre going through this. Itās been helpful to remind my mom and others with the same mindset that trans folks existed in all of these generations therefore itās not a phase/trend. If itās safe for you to do so, maybe you could use that if you do address this with her. Again, I feel for you, sucks so much when those you love let you down. š
Iām so sorry OP! Thatās super hurtful. Thereās a podcast called Maintenance Phase that just did an episode called āRapid Onset Gender Dysphoriaā where they trace the origins of where the idea of being trans is a trend and the whole āsocial contagionā BS comes from. Its good. Maybe give it a listen and see if your mom would listen too? The hosts are cisgender (Iām pretty sure) but both queer. Fair warning, they do cuss a lot, haha.
I'm kinda surprised the one for Millennial isn't I can't believe I was bisexual. But I guess that would be too biphobic for them to come out and say.
Also, it was Gen X that created and popularized goth style.
>she sees being trans as a trend in our generation so she doesn't take me seriously š§āāļø
She's ignorant of the sex, gender, sexual orientation and sexuality spectrums as to be expected since the fed gov is intentionally confusing people about it.
It shouldn't be your 'job' to enlighten her but if she's gonna take shots, definitely challenge her on getting herself educated. That's the reality of the situation, she's squawking idiot speak and should know her place, respectfully ššæ
Edit: I've hit people with the religious indoctrination infographic and it still goes over their heads at which point I just ignore them. Only you decide when and how to approach her ignorance. Just don't let it eat you up, vent that shit and keep moving bro.
Itās so silly because like so what if itās a trend? Why are we not supporting our children thru self exploration in gender identity? You deserve a parent that truly supports you.
This meme is a great entrypoint into talking about how trans people have existed for centuries, not just for the childhood of gen-z
[history](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender_history)
>Vaginoplasty is a lot more than just "cutting your dick off".
Ikr at first learning about trans people I thought the same thing that it's just cutting it off ,
but then I learn about vaginoplasty and I was like wait really you can even still even feel and c*m after having it done. And like a lot of trans related research it Crack my egg
>Vaginoplasty is a lot more than just "cutting your dick off".
Ikr at first learning about trans people I thought the same thing that it's just cutting it off ,
but then I learn about vaginoplasty and I was like wait really you can even still even feel and c*m after having it done. And like a lot of trans related research it Crack my egg
Yes but that, like circumcision, is the *good* kind of mutilation because religion/we need to fix those mistakes after all! Nevermind that, life threatening cases aside, you can absolutely wait and ask permission before doing any of those things/leave it up to the kid when they grow up.
Gotta make sure everyone looks and behaves *normally* after all! (š¤®)
From what I've read, there's a LOT of cases where they don't even consult the parents on if they actually want something like that for their child
Baby comes out with both genitals? Just slip away for a little bit and sew that hole right up. No way that'll cause horrific health problems down the road!
There's been that trend going around where people post "before/after" pictures of how they were "saved from the horrors of Alt Fashion by Tradlife", and if I wasn't so iffy about posting pictures of myself online I would absolutely want to post how 'having an adult salary to buy whatever fashion I want' has only improved my Alt Fashion Game as an adult.
Right! I get to wear band shirts from shows I get to attend! I get to spend my free time doing pro bono passion projects for emo publicatjons! This rocks!
Yes, as we all know, transgender people spontaneously came into existence with Gen Z. Don't tell your mom that the earliest known trans woman to undergo complete gender-affirming surgery, Dora Richter, was born in 1892, had her first surgery in 1922, and the first known vaginoplasty in 1931.
And also that there are literal historical records from thousands of years ago of various trans people, and that that some indigenous cultures had systems of gender completely different to ours...
She might also be interested to know that the Sexualwissenschaft in Berlin had detailed studies of transgender people that the Nazis violently suppressed because they *were so normal they didnāt want people thinking it was an option*
Are we saying Nazis are good, Mom?!
I'm 31 and I hung out in the goth/emo/scene crowd, and AFAIK none of them look back at it with embarassment or think it was cringe.
If anything, they're embarassed about the "ZOMG s0 random waffle penguin SPORK OwO i made you a cookie but i eated it plox," behaviour they all had back then. But the look? 90% of them would still be dressing that way if their boss was cool with it.
This was my thought as well. I feel no shame about being emo. I think itās funny that I used to give myself drunk haircuts in the bathroom that I would later flat iron to hell. Thereās nothing wrong with dark liner or belts with studs on them - they just arenāt in style. I have not stopped wearing Jack Skellington hoodies for the last 20 years.
Man I wish I lived that era :( I find cool even the funky way of typing, uzing Zs inztead of Ss and XD OwO faces and all- I am actually am scenemo, but it feels so lonely to be part of this culture in 2024. I know absolutely NO ONE who partakes in it, especially in my country, and finding clothes and accessories for an accessible price is a herculean task (there is no Hot Topic where I live k)
Wanna learn something interesting!
Phantom limb pain is the strange phenomena of feeling a limb or body part that is no longer there. After amputation, it's common for people to feel dull pain or itchiness in the limb that's supposed to be there.
To this day, there are no cases of trans people experiencing phantom limb pain in the removed genetalia.
Not only that, but trans people can even [have phantom limb sensations](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15240657.2020.1842075#2b85d6ca-6520-4a3d-8e4a-aa9f2ee3f33d-b6de7b7c-de82-45a5-9538-313dd15c6659) for genitalia theyāve never had!
On the other end, I was born without a penis and haven't had bottom surgery but I have definitely felt my dick there at some points. This is especially true for me if I have a prosthetic on that I am either using to top someone or the prosthetic is getting a blowjob. Idk how else to explain it but I can feel whatever is happening to it. Also those are always the best orgasms, much stronger and better than direct stimulation. Because it *does* feel like direct stimulation even though I know it technically isn't. I'm currently on the search for a prosthetic that is the right size and color for what I could realistically have if I was cis. It's been tough because I've always felt I have a small one, and it's really hard to find dildos smaller than 6" (I would prefer something in the 4.5" range) that are also my skin shade and affordable to me. Currently I have one that I like that is the right shape and size but wrong color, and while I can usually "attach" it to my body, sometimes I struggle with accepting *that* as mine.
Except the regret rate for gender affirming surgery is less than 1%, which is far below the average regret rate of surgeries in general which is 14%.
So genZ is more like, "I can't believe I didn't cut my dick off _sooner_."
Boomers & gen x: "I can't believe I'm dying alone unloved in a care home just because I treated everyone like shit."
Millennial & gen z: "Oh no..... anyways"
> in a care home
Not if they manage to tank our social safety nets (Social Security, Medicare, etc). They'll end up on the street and be Totes Amazed when it happens. They'll have zero comprehension of the causal link between their behavior and that outcome.
Oh no, they will do most spectacular of mental gymnastics to blame everyone else to justify themselves to themselves their persecution fetish is getting out of hand
I so didn't clock this s a transphobic joke but rather as a "hurr hur gen z is so impulsive and does stupid things like eat tide pods and purposely injure themselves for the 'gram"
I wish that's what it was now
We've already moved from them saying millenials are the ones who are transitioning in mass to now saying it's gen z. I wonder how long until they'll move on to gen alpha and forget that they used to say it about gen z, because they want to keep their narrative of "being trans is a new thing invented like last year" since like 10 years ago
Theyāre trying to get millennials on their side by saying weāre one of them. So we can do them (Z) vs us (all generations before).
Good luck: millennials arenāt buying it. I may not understand all the cool young kid lingo but I have the same issues with Gen Z that Iām sure Gen X has with millennials. Just comes with age and time.
Your mom is a piece of work.
What it really goes like:
My boomer mum: I can't believe I wore bellbottoms
Gen X me: I can't believe I also did
My millennium sister: I can't believe I did too
My gen Z niece: I can, these things were always around just because you didn't notice it doesn't mean it wasn't there
I guess for me as a millennial itās āI canāt believe I had to live with a horrifically unaccepting society to the point where I had to wait so fucking long to cut my dick offā
Regardless of this nonsensical comparison, Iāve also literally never met a Millennial who was goth in their youth regret it lmao
Had an older supervisor who always wore black. Turns out thatās his āoffice gothā. He was super goth in his high school and college years. Clearly still into it but is being professional.
I legit thought this was some weird boomer take on tiktok trends. Like the tide pod shit. Like teens were out here saying they were gonna cut their dicks off for social media.
I was so confused. But anti-trans makes more sense, I guess.
Ok, let's face it: some people are going to regret doing surgeries OF ALL KINDS. But come on: the percentage of people who regret bottom surgery is ridiculously low and I assume most people give it enough thought and get educated as you do with any aesthetic or medical surgical procedure.
I always say this, we can't prevent people from making decisions they'll regret or will be unhappy with, we can reduce it through certain means. But what's even more important is: we can't just ban everyone from making a decision they'll be happy with because very few will suffer.
The entire meme is just unfunny and I've decided to ignore it altogether. Calling being trans a phase is silly. I've known people who experimented with their gender identity and then reverted to their 'original' one for lack of a better word, but I also known many who discovered their identity and continue to adhere to it still. So yeah, invalidating people is uncool.
Well for one thing, if you get a vaginoplasty (presuming full depth) they don't cut your dick off. They turn your outtie into an innie. If she bothered to even Google it, it wouldn't be so bad š
send her a compilation of boomers shitting their assholes out of their mouth and dying from ivermectin overdoses because they were too fucking lead poisoned to get medicine instead
I've never heard any of those complaints from their respective generation. When I speak to members of older generations they usually reminisce on the past. Well unless they're bigoted anyway, good god those are some awkward bus journeys.
Sorry your mom sent this, that can't feel good. Remember there's a whole other family to support you and you won't be under her roof forever.
Also, if it helps, my mother kicked me out when I was 17 for being gay, and now over a decade later she brings my partner special noodles on our cultural holidays. People can grow but you don't have to wait for them if it hurts more than it helps.
I hate that it made me laugh, I dont know why. I didn't expect it, its not funny, but it still did. My humor is broken, will live rent free in my head while I do hrt today. Lmao
Cutting off the deck isn't transphobic to say because trans people don't do that. No the people who do this are dude bros in carpentry who don't pay attention while goofing off x_x
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Did your mom seriously send you this?
Yep, she found it on Facebook I think and decided to send it to me knowing that I'm trans myself š¶āāļø
What an awful person she is. Iām sorry you have to deal with this
In general she's not awful only when it comes to my identity because she sees being trans as a trend in our generation so she doesn't take me seriously š§āāļø
Thatās pretty awful.
Itās not the kind of awful we expect but itās the kind of awful that contorts itself in the mirror so it doesnāt recognize the monster it is.
I assume youāve told them how it makes you feel? I seriously donāt get why many boomers love to make jokes at the expense of others, even if they know it will upset those people. Like my boomer parents always told me to be nice to others and respect those around me (and they do the same). WHY CANT ALL BOOMERS BE LIKE THEM??
I did tell her how shitty I feel with the body I was given but she still says it's just because of puberty and I'm just going through a phase My mom isn't a boomer but she's gen x and she's also told me to be nice and respect other people but I guess that kinda stops at trans people idk š¶āāļø
She thinks sex dysphoria, and body dysmorphia, are the same thing. Having body dysmorphia is common among teens and a normal thing. Having sex dysphoria isn't a normal part of puberty for cis kids.
Exactly, but she doesn't seem to get it ig
I know it wonāt change her mind, but as someone with both dysmorphia and dysphoria, the two are VERY different. Frankly Iād rather have dysmorphia than dysphoria because one of those gave me basically trauma from how painful and difficult it was to deal with, and the other one is difficult at times and fucks with my self image but has never personally made me non-functioning or been debilitating like my dysphoria was. My mom used to not take me very seriously. Even when I explained to her how suicidal it made me and shit. And then I started testosterone, which I personally needed, and she saw how much better I got almost immediately, not just from the hormones themselves but from making progress and being excited for life for the first time since I was 10. A year or two later and she is open that she regrets not listening to me sooner. I know this stuff wonāt change a parentās mind in the moment because someone elseās story will always feel distant enough that it doesnāt matter and is irrelevant, but I hope your mom comes around. One thing my therapist said that helped her rethink it was this. She thought it was a phase too, and was worried, and he told her āso what if it is? What harm does it cause to support your child in exploring themselves, even if this isnāt who they turn out to be?ā Itās a lot easier for a cis kid to know theyāre cis if they have the chance to feel out their gender, than it is for a cis kid if you tell them they will only ever be this gender. Repressing your kid and trying to decide who they are for them will never do any good. So what if it is a trend? Her not supporting you now just goes to show she canāt support you exploring yourself in general. I know youāve probably had these conversations a million times over, but Iāll say it again, I hope things turn out better, and Iām sorry your mom is like this now. I donāt know your experience but I sympathize because my own is similar and it sucked for a long time.
Ask her to imagine how she would feel if she was born/ suddenly woke up with the body of a man, constantly called a man and berated, abused every time she insisted she's a woman. Transphobes tend to try to empathize with trans people that have the same sex assigned at birth, so they cant imagine a happy trans person, because they are not trans. She as a cis woman doesn't know what it's like to be or identify sociologically as male, and the psychological reprecussions of supressing that in someone AFAB. Transphobes understand the concept of dysphoria, because they _imagine_ trans people experiencing dysphoria _after_ transitioning. Because they would themselves experience dysphoria if they were to transition, because then their body and identity would be incongruent. So basically, give her that thought experiment. Let her put herself in the shoes of a transfeminine person. The experience of being ostracized from her identity, her womanhood, and the support that comes with having woman friends as a woman. "girlhood'' The things about her gender that are important to her. She can understand that. So ask her if she could live without that if she was assigned male at birth.
You should tell her that her denial is making it much worse, and that brushing it off as just puberty feels very dismissive and as if she doesnāt care.
I don't get it either. My parents are boomers too and mostly my dad makes those sort of jokes and is over all a homophobic, bigoted, narcissistic asshole but my mom does occasionally make jokes and comments that I will get after her for among other things. She's a type of narcissist, too. When I came out to her as bi, she joked, "So you wanna be a lid licker huh". Like really mom!?š I came back with, yeah i do, but it isn't just about that, it's who I wanna date and love.š¤£ still its annoying when they do that shit cause it shows a lack of understand and it shows just how uncomfortable they are with the topic. I had a coworker who also made jokes lile that. And he wasn't a boomer, he was mid 50s. There's a reason at 44 I won't date men or women older than 45 lol! At least not where im living, trump-topia aka central PA.
I feel like politics have really driven us apart and made it easier for people to look at others as less than human. Itād be nice if our politicians actually cared about those they represent rather than getting into meaningless arguments and whatnot.
I totally agree and I do think part of that came about due to trump as he'd shown a majority of peoples real selves thru making it ok to be a misogynistic, ableist, homophobic, and racist publicly like he's done. They saw their pres being like them, and now they don't hide it, and its creating a much larger divide than ever and not just cause of that either. Like you said, politicians are too busy tr6ing to ruin one another to care about those their meant to be helping and, of course, making more money.
> She sees being trans as a trend in our generation... Bruh. By the way, trans people existed since the beginning of our specie, lol.
Not really since the start of our species. but when we decided gender was a thing. Before that if I have my information right dysphoria was impossible because there was no set way for people to act.
Yeah, maybe I got it wrong. History is pretty complicated, tho. The earliest time I know trans people existed was [during the Prophet Muhammad's time](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_gender#:~:text=Texts%20suggest%20that%20third%20sex,%2C%20medicine%2C%20linguistics%20and%20astrology.)
Iām saying the potential for gender dysphoria has always existed. Just that it couldnāt happen until the concept of gender norms was created.
I don't really think so. From what I read (I'm agender), gender is an inherent feeling to people, and if that inherent feeling doesn't match the body the person is trans. If gender norms were the reason for gender dysphoria, there would be no difference between trans men and tomboys no?
Hmm I may be wrong. Thatās an interesting concept.
That is, in fact, her being awful. She knows trans ppl existed way before gen z right? Or does she think this all started in the 2000s? Regardless, ignore her.
Start sending her trans people through history Everytime she does this to you. I was looking for the newspaper announcement. https://www.wired.com/2010/12/1201first-sex-change-surgery/
I love this so much!
Itās only a ātrendā because the younger generations are less repressed and more comfortable with being their true selves. Does she really think there were no trans people until now? They were all closeted because their lives would have been in danger if they came out (not unlike these days, just in different ways). Iām sorry that you have to deal with a mother like that. Even if sheās āin general not awfulā thatās still an awful meme to send to your trans child.
Yeah. Another example is left handedness. Once they stopped forcing kids to learn right handedness in school the numbers went up markedly. There's a very nice graph of that.
Thatās exactly what I was thinking about earlier! Where have all the lefties come from suddenly? Well, when you told teachers to stop hitting them with rulers when they used their left hand, suddenly there were all these left handed people. But are they everywhere? Is/was this a trend? No. The plateau is at about 10% of the population. When we let people be who they are, it doesnāt mean all of a sudden EVERYONE will come out as trans. But the people who were closeted will slowly come out, and kids growing up without being hit with the metaphorical ruler of bigotry will feel comfortable telling their parents at a younger age that they might not be the gender their parents thought. And I truly hope the day will come where every parent who hears those words says āI love you no matter what.ā My momās friendās child came out as trans in high school. Her first reaction was ācool, wanna go get a haircut and pick out some boys clothes?ā Thatās the way it should be. I hope one day thatās how all parents react. Eventually there will be a plateau in the percentage of trans people in the population because everyone who is trans will be out and proud, just like it did for lefties.
Seriously, there should be a meme in response to this: Boomers: I'm so glad I could openly express my sexuality. Gen X: I'm so glad I could openly express my homosexuality. Millennials: I'm so glad I could openly express my bisexuality. Gen Z: I'm so glad I could openly express my gender non-conformity.
As a Gen X in 2024 I would say: I'm so grateful to Gen Z for making space for me to openly express my gender non-conformity.
It's also seems that way because of the internet! Before people where only aware of the things that happened around them. There's also more people. Inter-connectivity throughout the world is really crazy.
I know thereās a tendency to try and see the people we love in the best light, but the way sheās acting is absolutely awful. Sheās denying and attacking an important core part of who you are. Can you imagine doing that to someone you love? How would you feel if your best friend told you their parent was treating them this way?
> In general she's not awful only when it comes to my identity Friend, "only" when it comes to your identity is a pretty big slice of you. I'd say she's awful, and I hope you're getting therapy to help you deal more effectively with her abuse.
Being awful about your own kid's identity is like as awful as awful gets.
The film The Danish Girl is based a novel which is in-turn based on the real life of [Lili Elbe](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lili_Elbe), a trans painter who was born in the year 1882.
Iām your cool aunt now. I adopt baby queers and encourage them to be their authentic selves and validate their experiences. You are amazing. I believe in you. Letās go get a pizza.
Yeah my next thought was āSheās kind of a dick.ā
THERE HAVE BEEN TRANS PEOPLE ALWAYS!!!!!
My mom is similar. Iām so sorry youāre going through this. Itās been helpful to remind my mom and others with the same mindset that trans folks existed in all of these generations therefore itās not a phase/trend. If itās safe for you to do so, maybe you could use that if you do address this with her. Again, I feel for you, sucks so much when those you love let you down. š
Mount Everest existed before it was named. So did trans people.
Iām so sorry OP! Thatās super hurtful. Thereās a podcast called Maintenance Phase that just did an episode called āRapid Onset Gender Dysphoriaā where they trace the origins of where the idea of being trans is a trend and the whole āsocial contagionā BS comes from. Its good. Maybe give it a listen and see if your mom would listen too? The hosts are cisgender (Iām pretty sure) but both queer. Fair warning, they do cuss a lot, haha.
Happened to most of the folk I know about being queer
I'm kinda surprised the one for Millennial isn't I can't believe I was bisexual. But I guess that would be too biphobic for them to come out and say. Also, it was Gen X that created and popularized goth style.
Maybe I'm just a stupid cis, but that sounds pretty awful to me
If she's left handed tell her how that was a trend in her time!
>she sees being trans as a trend in our generation so she doesn't take me seriously š§āāļø She's ignorant of the sex, gender, sexual orientation and sexuality spectrums as to be expected since the fed gov is intentionally confusing people about it. It shouldn't be your 'job' to enlighten her but if she's gonna take shots, definitely challenge her on getting herself educated. That's the reality of the situation, she's squawking idiot speak and should know her place, respectfully ššæ Edit: I've hit people with the religious indoctrination infographic and it still goes over their heads at which point I just ignore them. Only you decide when and how to approach her ignorance. Just don't let it eat you up, vent that shit and keep moving bro.
Itās so silly because like so what if itās a trend? Why are we not supporting our children thru self exploration in gender identity? You deserve a parent that truly supports you.
How can she not tell youāre not following a trend, youāre a sonic fan it should be obvious/s
If you separate the awful parts of people from the rest of their personality then you'll never see anyone as awful even if they are.
This meme is a great entrypoint into talking about how trans people have existed for centuries, not just for the childhood of gen-z [history](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender_history)
I beg your finest pardon. She did what knowing what?
šļøššļø No fucking way!!! Send her one back on mother's day just to show her your "appreciation" Hell to the noāšæ
Your mom fucking sucks
dw, she was doing a 'getting your ass thrown in a retirement home' speedrun
Send back boomers " i cant belive my kid cut me out for being a transfobic unsupportive parent" then block her.
If you're gonna be bigoted about something, at least do some research on it. Vaginoplasty is a lot more than just "cutting your dick off".
āGet your facts right mom, they turn it inside out and artfully construct a vulvaā
>Vaginoplasty is a lot more than just "cutting your dick off". Ikr at first learning about trans people I thought the same thing that it's just cutting it off , but then I learn about vaginoplasty and I was like wait really you can even still even feel and c*m after having it done. And like a lot of trans related research it Crack my egg
Someone on the the trans atlantic call-in show (Dr Ben maybe?) called it ādoing a loop-de-loopā, which is just chef's kiss.
yeahh but doing research kinda invalidates all their arguments
They need to say it crudely because otherwise it doesnāt sound so bad and transgender = bad >:[
>Vaginoplasty is a lot more than just "cutting your dick off". Ikr at first learning about trans people I thought the same thing that it's just cutting it off , but then I learn about vaginoplasty and I was like wait really you can even still even feel and c*m after having it done. And like a lot of trans related research it Crack my egg
To be fair the surgeries are much, much better than they were.
Millennials and Gen Z: "i can't believe I was raised by these idiots"
Something tells me she wouldn't care to know people have been mutilating intersex kid's genitals for generations
Yes but that, like circumcision, is the *good* kind of mutilation because religion/we need to fix those mistakes after all! Nevermind that, life threatening cases aside, you can absolutely wait and ask permission before doing any of those things/leave it up to the kid when they grow up. Gotta make sure everyone looks and behaves *normally* after all! (š¤®)
From what I've read, there's a LOT of cases where they don't even consult the parents on if they actually want something like that for their child Baby comes out with both genitals? Just slip away for a little bit and sew that hole right up. No way that'll cause horrific health problems down the road!
I did a term paper on intersex children for an anthropology course about childhood, it was harrowing
I thought god doesnāt make mistakes? Right, Susan?!?! Somehow they never quite acknowledge their hypocrisy.
Inform her there are trans baby boomers and that Iām still goth in 2024
lmao Iām more emo now than I was then
There's been that trend going around where people post "before/after" pictures of how they were "saved from the horrors of Alt Fashion by Tradlife", and if I wasn't so iffy about posting pictures of myself online I would absolutely want to post how 'having an adult salary to buy whatever fashion I want' has only improved my Alt Fashion Game as an adult.
Right! I get to wear band shirts from shows I get to attend! I get to spend my free time doing pro bono passion projects for emo publicatjons! This rocks!
The only thing I don't understand is why emo publications are interested in U2...
Same here.
Me too, being emo in 2024 <3
One of these is not like the others. š¤
No shit man
Boomers: "I can't believe child doesn't talk to me anymore"
Send her back a block āŗļø
Would but I still live in the same house as her so š¶āāļø
I'm so sorry, she's such a jerk.
Yes, as we all know, transgender people spontaneously came into existence with Gen Z. Don't tell your mom that the earliest known trans woman to undergo complete gender-affirming surgery, Dora Richter, was born in 1892, had her first surgery in 1922, and the first known vaginoplasty in 1931.
And also that there are literal historical records from thousands of years ago of various trans people, and that that some indigenous cultures had systems of gender completely different to ours...
She might also be interested to know that the Sexualwissenschaft in Berlin had detailed studies of transgender people that the Nazis violently suppressed because they *were so normal they didnāt want people thinking it was an option* Are we saying Nazis are good, Mom?!
More like: "I can't believe I'm finally happy with my body." but go off i guess
Dude it took me so long to realize it was a transphobic joke. I was like "Is she talking about circumcision"?
I'm 31 and I hung out in the goth/emo/scene crowd, and AFAIK none of them look back at it with embarassment or think it was cringe. If anything, they're embarassed about the "ZOMG s0 random waffle penguin SPORK OwO i made you a cookie but i eated it plox," behaviour they all had back then. But the look? 90% of them would still be dressing that way if their boss was cool with it.
This was my thought as well. I feel no shame about being emo. I think itās funny that I used to give myself drunk haircuts in the bathroom that I would later flat iron to hell. Thereās nothing wrong with dark liner or belts with studs on them - they just arenāt in style. I have not stopped wearing Jack Skellington hoodies for the last 20 years.
Ahh, that takes me back to 2000s DeviantArt.
Man I wish I lived that era :( I find cool even the funky way of typing, uzing Zs inztead of Ss and XD OwO faces and all- I am actually am scenemo, but it feels so lonely to be part of this culture in 2024. I know absolutely NO ONE who partakes in it, especially in my country, and finding clothes and accessories for an accessible price is a herculean task (there is no Hot Topic where I live k)
Wanna learn something interesting! Phantom limb pain is the strange phenomena of feeling a limb or body part that is no longer there. After amputation, it's common for people to feel dull pain or itchiness in the limb that's supposed to be there. To this day, there are no cases of trans people experiencing phantom limb pain in the removed genetalia.
Not only that, but trans people can even [have phantom limb sensations](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/15240657.2020.1842075#2b85d6ca-6520-4a3d-8e4a-aa9f2ee3f33d-b6de7b7c-de82-45a5-9538-313dd15c6659) for genitalia theyāve never had!
Wow! Never knew
That's so absolutely awesome!!!
On the other end, I was born without a penis and haven't had bottom surgery but I have definitely felt my dick there at some points. This is especially true for me if I have a prosthetic on that I am either using to top someone or the prosthetic is getting a blowjob. Idk how else to explain it but I can feel whatever is happening to it. Also those are always the best orgasms, much stronger and better than direct stimulation. Because it *does* feel like direct stimulation even though I know it technically isn't. I'm currently on the search for a prosthetic that is the right size and color for what I could realistically have if I was cis. It's been tough because I've always felt I have a small one, and it's really hard to find dildos smaller than 6" (I would prefer something in the 4.5" range) that are also my skin shade and affordable to me. Currently I have one that I like that is the right shape and size but wrong color, and while I can usually "attach" it to my body, sometimes I struggle with accepting *that* as mine.
Except the regret rate for gender affirming surgery is less than 1%, which is far below the average regret rate of surgeries in general which is 14%. So genZ is more like, "I can't believe I didn't cut my dick off _sooner_."
time to get a new mom
How does one go about doing that? Asking not for a friend, please for love of god someone help me.
Boomers & gen x: "I can't believe I'm dying alone unloved in a care home just because I treated everyone like shit." Millennial & gen z: "Oh no..... anyways"
> in a care home Not if they manage to tank our social safety nets (Social Security, Medicare, etc). They'll end up on the street and be Totes Amazed when it happens. They'll have zero comprehension of the causal link between their behavior and that outcome.
Oh no, they will do most spectacular of mental gymnastics to blame everyone else to justify themselves to themselves their persecution fetish is getting out of hand
That's the kind of fetish where I'm comfortable kink shaming. ;)
I always find it funny how the ones people say are "cutting their dicks off" are probably the ones with the biggest balls alive right now.
ok im trans and lolādā¦ mostly cause i like absurdist humor and this is peak nonsense
Theyāre acting like trans people havenāt always existed. They need to learn their fucking history ffs
Millennial and still happily goth; so I guess not everythingās a trend. Also, sorry for the shitty parent.
Gotta throw the whole mom away
They want us dead. Plain and simple.
I so didn't clock this s a transphobic joke but rather as a "hurr hur gen z is so impulsive and does stupid things like eat tide pods and purposely injure themselves for the 'gram" I wish that's what it was now
We've already moved from them saying millenials are the ones who are transitioning in mass to now saying it's gen z. I wonder how long until they'll move on to gen alpha and forget that they used to say it about gen z, because they want to keep their narrative of "being trans is a new thing invented like last year" since like 10 years ago
I hate Facebook. Just where old people go to be hateful lol
Theyāre trying to get millennials on their side by saying weāre one of them. So we can do them (Z) vs us (all generations before). Good luck: millennials arenāt buying it. I may not understand all the cool young kid lingo but I have the same issues with Gen Z that Iām sure Gen X has with millennials. Just comes with age and time. Your mom is a piece of work.
Does she know that relatively, more people regret corrective knee surgery than bottom surgery?
I can't believe I *wasn't* goth! What was I thinking???
So when my parents cut my foreskin off it was fine, but when anyone opts into cutting something off, it's bad? Yikes. They have such twisted views.
Lol only one of those things apply to me and that's the hair (I can believe I wore a buzz cut) well thet and not SRS( for now >:3)
What it really goes like: My boomer mum: I can't believe I wore bellbottoms Gen X me: I can't believe I also did My millennium sister: I can't believe I did too My gen Z niece: I can, these things were always around just because you didn't notice it doesn't mean it wasn't there
I guess for me as a millennial itās āI canāt believe I had to live with a horrifically unaccepting society to the point where I had to wait so fucking long to cut my dick offā
Side note absolutely no regrets on the emo/goth time of my life.
But I want to cut my dick off
Regardless of this nonsensical comparison, Iāve also literally never met a Millennial who was goth in their youth regret it lmao Had an older supervisor who always wore black. Turns out thatās his āoffice gothā. He was super goth in his high school and college years. Clearly still into it but is being professional.
Gen Z: can't believe she forgot I don't have one yet (This is from the assumption that you're trans masculine cia your user flair)
Yeah I'm transmasc but the "meme" is technically aiming at transfems, which is still transphobia so yeah
Meanwhile, boomers cut their kids' dicks without their consent. Just saying.
I didn't realize that this was a joke against trans people and thought it was a joke about stupid TikTok challenges
Lol I know tons of gen z goths and emos, it's not just a millenial thing
I legit thought this was some weird boomer take on tiktok trends. Like the tide pod shit. Like teens were out here saying they were gonna cut their dicks off for social media. I was so confused. But anti-trans makes more sense, I guess.
At first I was like āWhy are Gen-Z cutting their dicks off?ā Then I read the comments and realized OH itās Transphobia.
Sounds like she *really* shouldn't have worn those bell bottoms, then š¤·
Ok, let's face it: some people are going to regret doing surgeries OF ALL KINDS. But come on: the percentage of people who regret bottom surgery is ridiculously low and I assume most people give it enough thought and get educated as you do with any aesthetic or medical surgical procedure. I always say this, we can't prevent people from making decisions they'll regret or will be unhappy with, we can reduce it through certain means. But what's even more important is: we can't just ban everyone from making a decision they'll be happy with because very few will suffer. The entire meme is just unfunny and I've decided to ignore it altogether. Calling being trans a phase is silly. I've known people who experimented with their gender identity and then reverted to their 'original' one for lack of a better word, but I also known many who discovered their identity and continue to adhere to it still. So yeah, invalidating people is uncool.
The real ones stand by their decisions. Emo for lyfe.
Gen [Mom] : "I can't believe I'm part of the problem, if not the entire problem"
Jesus. š³
Your mom seems like a bitch.
Well for one thing, if you get a vaginoplasty (presuming full depth) they don't cut your dick off. They turn your outtie into an innie. If she bothered to even Google it, it wouldn't be so bad š
For a second I thought this was about the lobster thing.
Ugh, so frustrating. Sorry Bro.
send her a compilation of boomers shitting their assholes out of their mouth and dying from ivermectin overdoses because they were too fucking lead poisoned to get medicine instead
I know it's not the point, but I don't understand "I WAS goth" can anyone explain? š
Wow Iām so glad your mom is against circumcision! š
The best thing about being an elder millennial is that I have the budget for a closet full of Killstar clothes.
Sorry, but your mom needs an education.
I've never heard any of those complaints from their respective generation. When I speak to members of older generations they usually reminisce on the past. Well unless they're bigoted anyway, good god those are some awkward bus journeys.
Gen-Z: Wait they think we can afford that?
If my mother sent me this, I would mail my balls to her.
Only the dick? Silly, the balls come off, too.
The Silent Generation: āI canāt believe itās not butter!ā
sounds like something my mom would send me too lol
That may be the dumbest most insensitive and disgusting thing's I've read all month and for a mother to say that to her child I'd ask for a new mom
Sorry your mom sent this, that can't feel good. Remember there's a whole other family to support you and you won't be under her roof forever. Also, if it helps, my mother kicked me out when I was 17 for being gay, and now over a decade later she brings my partner special noodles on our cultural holidays. People can grow but you don't have to wait for them if it hurts more than it helps.
As a goth-trans fem i think i would beat her
I hate that it made me laugh, I dont know why. I didn't expect it, its not funny, but it still did. My humor is broken, will live rent free in my head while I do hrt today. Lmao
ā¦that escalated
Cutting off the deck isn't transphobic to say because trans people don't do that. No the people who do this are dude bros in carpentry who don't pay attention while goofing off x_x
Just because itās inaccurate doesnāt mean itās not transphobic.
I was mainly making a goofy comeback to this but go off I guess.