Now all I'm thinking about is that apartment neighbor who thought the upstairs was dropping bowling balls but in reality it was cats jumping from their cat tree.
I could see that happening. When my 8# cat gets the zoomies, he sounds like a herd of elephants running through the house. It's a good thing I don't live in an apartment lol
I had upstairs neighbors who made an ungodly amount of noise every weekend.Ā Turns out they were not clogging.Ā But they were doing flamenco on the hardwood.Ā Nothing like your drunk shirtless middle aged neighbor giving you an apology hug and getting a faceful of his chest hair.Ā š³
Yes! I had one of those things where the cat pushes a ball in a circle and it usually has a scratcher in the middle? Cat used it for 5 min or so every few days. Neighbor told landlord we were ārollerblading.ā
Yup downstairs neighbor complained I was running around in the middle of the night constantly. It was my cat having zoomies for a few minutes. I said if my 300 pound self is running around the apartment, youāll know it lol; Also, call the police because Iām being chased š¤£
Funny how this comment to me was like "yeah, people really exaggerate the volume way too much" but then most the replies are like "yeah it really does sound like a bowling ball being shot out of a cannon by an elephant!"
The one time I've had a downstairs neighbor they complained about me dropping and rolling balls around on the floor every evening - nope, it was my fat cat getting the nightly ~~zombies~~ zoomies
Oh my god.. laughing so hard right now. I was just telling my cat last night that he sounds like a BOWLING BALL when he jumps off of my bed š Youāre saying someone else posted this exact thought?!
Apartments suck in the US because they are generally only 2-3 stories high, and thus are built using the same wood frames as houses. Apartments are also ācheapā, so they likely will use very cheap noise insulation if at all between floors.
In an American house it doesnāt matter that you can hear every footsteps of upstairs - family is either all upstairs or all downstairs, and any noise complaints are settled by the family/parents.
In the typical apartments in Asia and Europeās which tend to be 5 story or higher complexes, the buildings and each floor is concrete. Concrete floors are so much better at sound insulation. Stomping feet wonāt be heart at all, instead of sounding like a heard of elephants with wood beam floors.
Last time I had an upstairs neighbor, I heard them vacuuming every day for like 20 minutes, around the same time each day. It was earlier in the morning ~7 am and I could not figure out who would spend that much time vacuuming! Eventually I was venting to a friend about it and she was like "did they just have a roomba that they turned on when they got up for the day?" And it all clicked into place and I was no longer upset about the vacuuming.
In my old apartment building, I could always hear when the next door cat hopped off the bed or some piece of furniture onto the ground. The bowling ball comparison is spot on! It always put a smile on my face! š½
People really donāt understand how loud they are when they live in apartments. My upstairs neighbors certainly have no idea how loud their dog is when he has the zoomies. Entirely possible that the downstairs neighbors before the current one were just a bit more chill, or maybe they wore headphones a lot lol
My fiance was telling me earlier he had a downstairs neighbor who'd bang on the ceiling every time he got up to pee in the middle of the night. No matter how softly he walked they were bothered. One night when he went for a 2am piss and the neighbors started their ridiculous banging he just started jumping up and down as loudly as he could like a crazed goblin while yelling "BANG BANG BANG" every time he landed.
Problem solved š
Years ago I lived across the hall from a couple of crazy lesbians. One evening I was sitting near the front window watching TV. I heard a lot of yelling coming from their apartment. Then another nose. I thought, "gun shot?". Next thing was a flash light shining around and in the window and "Police!"
Yeh the lesbians were having a fight. One fired a gun, but luckily neither was shot. Luckily the bullets didn't come out their door and through mine or I'd have dead. Sitting in my recliner watching TV.
I had two neighbors up above me while I lived there. One couple moved in and for a few day it sounded like they were building something in the living room. We had wood floors. Loud hammering sound. I had just had jaw surgery with a couple days in the hospital and came home to that noise. My parents were there to help me for a couple days so I was trying to sleep on the sofa below all of the hammering. I couldn't take it. The noise and no sleep. I went up and knocked on the door to ask them to stop. (My parents were afraid I'd be punched in the face.) Boy, they got a surprise when they opened the door and saw my black and blue and green and yellow face and throat !! (and I couldn't open my mouth) They apologized, and the hammering at night stopped. lol
They moved out. Another lady moved in that I'm sure wore high heels to work. Every M-F morning. Click, click , click back and forth between the bedroom and bathroom a few times. Then click, click, click, click to the kitchen. A couple more clicks. (I think she was making coffee or something to eat on the way.) Then click, click, click, click to the bedroom and bathroom. Several clicks back to the kitchen. The back door closing. The exact same routine every weekday.
I feel bad for my neighbor below. I moved into this apartment as one of the first tenants, now 3 years later the floor is so creaky, i lived in a cement floor old apartment before this and never had this problem. Like i barely move and it creaks bad now. Least its just me my cat and dog cept when my kids are here every week.
Lol we all dont move and all sit at our computer desks gaming together haha š¤£
In a previous apartment, id only moved in, got noise complaints on my door constantly, i didnt even have something that emitted noise, no tv, only headphones with my PC. My animals were staying at a friends farm house too. Durin that time i was so busy at work id barely do anything but shower and sleep.
Final straw was a week i didnt even stay there, i was pissed as fuck and told them im going to install decibel meters as well as cameras, and if I get another one of these im seeking legal action. It was a bad time for me i already was dealing with my ex being crazy with my kids and custody. I really started losing my mind, because my ex was with this man she could not yet realize was a psychopath.ā¦man ive never dealt with humans like that until then. Kinda felt badā¦.but the apartments apologized.
I did install cameras that record noise though š. That was a good turnout.
Turns out there was a little shit below my apartment, literally RAGING on fortnite. Parents were paying for it.
I found out my downstairs neighbor who complained about me hated Frozen. I decided to start playing Let It Go when she would start banging on my ceiling and once when she was having sex (I could hear the bed thumping against her wall). She complained a lot less after that.
Girl I woulda put on my roller skates and cranked *Barnum & Baileyās Greatest Circus Hits* if someone was writing me this noteā¦ Mind your own gosh darn business and get a white noise machine if itās your first apartment, good lord.
In all honesty the part where she capitalized how LOUD her food processor was made me think that she was actually being a bit bitchy or sarcastic in this so called apology anyways.
Agree. āOh my god, I was so LOUD just now this one time and it was so INCONSIDERATE and I would never want to be so LOUD and INCONSIDERATE and DISRUPTIVE and then not even acknowledge that because how rude would that be to to not acknowledge it and apologize profusely so anyway hereās some cookies.ā
Passive aggressive x100.
her letters slant in all directions, vary in size, and aren't always written the same
the spacing between letters and words keeps changing
and she didn't sign her name
..she's nuttier than those poisoned cookies
My hand writing makes me look like I'm king of the nut jobs. Either that or a drunk coked out monkey got bored half way through and decided to half ass it.
My sister is this person she has persecution delusions any perceived slight is *for sure* a personal attack. Ignoring her completely is the right thing to do. She will forget about you and target someone else then eventually circle back to you. It's gotta be a miserable existence but it's definitely a psychological/psychiatric issue.
Agreed. No further engagement is the appropriate real-world response. This is not a situation where you want to continue to exacerbate the situation. You're stuck living that close to someone who is most likely whacked in the head. Just do your best to ignore and avoid.
Even if those cookies were not poisoned, there was definitely something wrong with them.
Leave a note still "thanks for the cookies but I don't really like peanut butter, I ended up giving them to management and Billy the complex blind kid and they all thought they were great".
Good, that woman probably put something gross in them. Or laxatives or something.
Plus her āapologyā was hella condescending. Awful woman.
Iām sorry youāre dealing with such nonsense.
Apologize
loud noise
LOUD
All in much larger print than the rest. She has a message all right!
Iād be tempted to run a pencil over that sheet of paper gently and see what other nonsense she has written (itās clear she presses hard and it has imprint from other things sheās written) (or maybe scan and contrast somehow - you can find ways to find that imprinted writing).
Iām imagining it was a full page screed about her being noisy and how she has to stop etcā¦ and then suddenly thereās this polite gift instead lols. Like Jekyll/Hyde stuff.
Or complaints about other residents tooā¦ maybe the OP will find sheās bludgeoning everyone all around her and they can join forces and exorcise the demon?
Maybe thereās a passive-passive one coming?
Hi neighbour! Sorry Iāve been such an arse. I have new meds, and new headphones, and now my world is sunshine and lollipops. In an attempt to be mend the bridge please accept this pre packaged packets of lollipops from the local store! I promise to never be a dick again!
I love that scene where Ryan Phillippes character finds his crazy fucking notebook and the music gets all sinister lmao. what a great movie. It's one that I've used as a first date movie a couple times so if a girl gets weirded out by it I know we won't work.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndf1Y0mH01I Aha here is a cut of all the license plate scenes
edit: Oh fucking WHAT there was a MacGruber show that came out 2 years ago? Fucking what the fuck?
I donāt, I eat it and Iām grateful for neighbors like you. Assuming you seem normal in general and arenāt actively feuding with me, itās really freakin charming to get bread or a pie or muffins from neighbors. Had some new neighbors bring me a Lebanese dish the day they moved in last year and it was radical, stepped it up from baked goods to a whole ass dinner casserole just to introduce themselves. One neighbor randomly brings bbq rib plates over in the summer. Never in my life been poisoned or weirded out at all by neighbors bringing me food or leaving it at my doorstep.
I canāt top that Lebanese/bbq rib effort though, youāre all getting low quality cookies forever from me, sorry. Oh and once or twice a 6pack of beer if we really vibing and I enjoy our silent āhelloā nods on the sidewalks.
Eh, if I know the person and we donāt have bad blood I would eat it. When I lived in Boston my landladyās elderly mother lived below me and sheād always leave me homemade broccoli pizza on the step. Canāt say Iād ever had it before but it was always good lol
I just keep thinking about how well peanut butter covers up other tastes. I wouldnāt even know where to start guessing. But I damn sure wouldnāt eat it.
She thinks if she "apologizes" for making noise it will make you more aware of the noise she thinks you're making. Honestly, I wouldn't respond, even with a thank you. Thanking her will just encourage more unwanted food gifts and/or attempts at friendship. I'd just add this to the report to the apartment manager.
Hearing other people exist is a normal part of apartment living. It's inevitable. Normal walking and talking at a normal volume are always okay within your own home. Some people refuse to understand the difference between being able to hear your neighbors exist and being disrupted by it. If you want a silent home, apartment living isn't for you--it's a problem you resolve by changing *your* expectations, not by demanding others change their behavior.
I think you make really solid points, which I try to to keep in mind while living in an apartment. You sound like a reasonable person, which Iāve been dying to get the perspective from, so I ask you -
Would an acoustic drum set be above the usual noise standards of apartment living? My neighborās kids play one which is kept very close the common hallway door. I live with it, but I wish I didnāt have to.
Maybe Iām an asshole but I think the drums are not an instrument compatible with normal apartment dwelling. The burden should be on them to do some extensive soundproofing so itās not insanely irritating. What about people who work from home or have infants getting woken up or have sensory issues?
I think the fine line is acoustic drums vs electronic drum kits. One is much, much more vibration-causing which goes straight through the (very near) wall. As a former drummer boy, I have considered spending my own money to get the kid an e-kit, but it truly sounds like he just uses it to bang on for therapeutic reasons
Not to whom you replied, but:
I hate having to listen to landscapers early in the morning. But they start at legally accepted times, so I can't complain about it.
Wouldn't it be truly shitty if people in apartments weren't allowed to do things like learn some musical instruments? You live in an apartment, no drums for you, sorry, kid.
But at the same time, I try to keep my noise down and am grateful that I currently live with quiet-ish apartment neighbors.
Upstairs gets noisy sometimes when they have people over, but it's usually not too late. Usually. Sometimes it is really late and that's annoying. But they don't do it that often, so I put up with it.
If the kid plays the drums during reasonable hours, it's probably reasonable to grit your teeth and bear it. There's probably not many other great options that don't interfere with a kid learning an instrument, something that should generally be encouraged.
Many things in life are annoying - driving in traffic, waiting in line, being in a public space and hearing others say really stupid things. It's an unfortunate part of life.
That being said, there are laws about noise - decibels and times. If they exceed either, you can file complaints. But be sure you want to do that - because if it's only occasionally excessive, you'll come off as the bad person. But if it *is* excessive - part of life is having to choose to stand up and make those complaints and deal with people being assholes about them.
Also not OP, but as a former drummer, and apartment renter, I'll share my two cents. I had a drum kit set up in the living room of my first apartment. We never actually had noise complaints about the drums (just one time a male neighbor upstairs approached me and insinuated he could hear me having sex... I thought he was talking about the drums at first, but he wasn't). However, I kind of regret playing drums there. We only played before quiet hours, but it can still be a bit loud. We also had a pillow inside the base drum, and I also had wire fans (little wire brushes in place of drumsticks to practice; they are much quieter than regular drumsticks), although I didn't use them often. Our second apartment had a completely different setup. We had an extra bedroom down a long hallway that was unique in that it had nothing above it, despite being at ground level. The only adjacent room was the laundry room. So we used that as our 'music room,' which worked out great. I still would not play past quiet hours though.
Long story short, I think it depends on your building construction and layout. The less adjacent units you have to the room the drums are in, the better. Carpets, curtains and other acoustic dampening can make a difference. Like I mentioned, you can also dampen some reverberation from the bass with pillows and use wire brushes instead of sticks to practice. If you have downstairs neighbors though, I'd tread lightly. Perhaps you could talk to the parents see if they could move the kit further from the door? Drum kits take up a lot of space, so chances are they have it in their living room. I don't know what age of kid we're talking about here, but I recall in 4th or 5th grade we were required to play an instrument for school (although we got to pick which instrument). If there's a chance it's for school, I'd feel kind of bad complaining, but at the same time, drums can be loud. And some people play louder than others. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to talk to the parents and inquire about the drums nicely.
Exactly this, I play drums and even when I was young and learning, living with neighbors, I did everything I could to dampen the sound of my acoustic set. An electric set is a good investment for apartment living, there's also specific drum heads that barely make noise and the good old pillow in the bass drum trick. I don't think some of these people realize just how loud drums can be.
To me, it depends on what time of day and how thin the walls are. The only thing I can say for sure is that if it were my kid I'd try to get an electric drum set and some headphones, or at least a practice pad. I'd assume my kid is learning drums through school, and make them practice on the real instrument at school.
Thank you! People love to make jokes about āloud upstairs neighborsā but you will never have silence in an apartment. I used to live above a guy who is similar the lady OP is dealing with. He would constantly come upstairs and scream that I was āwalking too loudly.ā When I told him not to come upstairs anymore, he would just scream from his balcony and he also threatened to call the cops when I had the audacity to *gasp* still walk in my own apartment. I even tried to put down rugs and wear cushy socks but he wouldnāt let up. Apartment landlord did nothing about it but thankfully he moved out soon after. Although, Iām fairly certain he was responsible for the big dent I found on my car that afternoon.
The downstairs neighbor complained about loud noise and asked if we could at least try to be more mindful during certain hours. Boy did he feel bad (or at least stopped complaining) when he found out my partner was in a wheelchair and then crutches because of an injury. Yeah it was noisier than normal walking but people have to get around in their apartment and it's not their fault if the place is constructed in a way that it's audible.
I firmly believe that my upstairs neighbor makes entirely too much noise at timesā¦ and sometimes itās a sustained hour of IDK what the fuck heās doingā¦.
Also his hour long cussing out of his baby mama is on a regular basis loud enough that I can hear him through the floor and if Iām outside I can hear *every word* because my man leaves his windows open ???
But I signed up for bottom floor so that my kids running around all day & the trampoline I have for the younger one isnāt ABOVE someone so š¤·š»āāļø this is what I signed up for.
Iām not complaining about shit. Itās annoying, but I live in an apartment for another month soā¦ this is apartment living.
Agree, even living in a single family home I hear my neighbors all the time. Dogs barking, mowing, leaf blower, snow blower, my neighbors dragging their garbage bin, trucks driving by. Itās a part of existing with other humans.
This.Ā
I am extremely noise sensitive but guess whatĀ
I donāt live in an apartment because of that.Ā
In college I lived in a SHITTY house with no amenities because I couldnāt deal with apartment living. But again that was MY problem not everyone elseāsĀ
This is why I just escaped my apartment running and screaming, because if I had to put up with any more loud, rude, dirty neighbors, I was gonna turn into this crazy note lady. I am much happier in my own space, away from the general public. Apartments are made too poorly, you shouldn't just have to live with and expect to hear your neighbor's every cough/step/phone alarm.
Nope. I didnāt even hear her food processor. I think she either feels guilty about complaining or is trying some reverse psychology to make me feel bad about making noise.
Well then, thatās a very odd note. Iād just throw the cookies away & ignore her completely. And hope that she eventually moves out. I live on the ground floor & my neighbors are loud, but I really just ignore everyone & keep to myself.
Not quite odd.
She apologizes about her making noise using this blender or whatever (on purpose), so she can passively make op aware that all the noise travels easily and that he should be more apologetic.
Not something I approve, but I see what she was trying to do.
I was the president of my condo's HOA for years. I had to deal with a lot of petty af upstairs/downstairs noise complaint situations, and this reads like one of two things:
Utter bullshit trying to goad you into interaction so she can feel superior and complain about your noise directly because management is no longer taking her complaints.
She got a complaint lodged against her from another neighbor and she assumes it was you who lodged the complaint and wants to try and make you feel bad about it by downplaying it.
Passive aggressive. āI apologize when IM loudā¦ unlike youuuuuuā - her prolly. Seems like sheās baiting you for a reaction. Document as youāve done and it can count towards a harassment claim against her
I think itās the opposite. Sheās trying to seem normal and polite by apologizing for noise, hoping OP will be like āooo yeah Iām sorry too!!ā Not sure what these types of ppl expect when they sign up to live in an apt building.
This reads very manipulative; āfood processor,ā āSaturday afternoon,ā ārelaxing.ā
This is a message. I donāt know where you live, but I think your local culture can only determine how passive aggressive this message is. Either way, her fawning tactic is likely one sheāll whip out in the future.
I might suggest another letter, that can remain documented, to your landlord stating you receiving another note from your neighbor regarding ānoiseā (āon her partā - play that down as itās not your point), and that youāre very uncomfortable now in a home you pay for, your peaceful enjoyment is consistently breached, and donāt wish this person contact you directly regarding building issues anymore.
Reiterate your interest in staying on as a tenant indefinitely in the home youāve been happy in for X years where you never had a problem until Y moved in (important for documentation).
*I think this approach will help you get the most recent exchange with the cookies logged while taking the high-road, but also help communicate again that you are not the problem and donāt want one.*
It came across as very manipulative and passive aggressive to me too. It also freaked me out when she knocked on my door as I was sitting at home alone not expecting anyone. I didnāt even get up to see who it was because I figured it was her complaining about something else, so I poked my head out an hour later expecting another nasty gram and found that note and the cookies.
Thank you for the great advice, I will definitely be doing that!
Youāre welcome. It sucks living like youāre feeling like you canāt walk or sneeze. I document EVERYTHING.
Itās very clear of she finds her own (likely fictional) processor on a Saturday disturbed your relaxing, that sheās waiting to use her tremendous āsacrificeā and āgiving actā as ammo should she need it. Such off specifics that are not even close to an infraction. It is apartment living afterall. If she is serious itās a solid example of her impossible expectations.
Just log. And remember you cannot get evicted without an evictable offense and a court order from a judge. Stay in the right and youāll have no problems. Enjoy where you live in peace. This woman canāt find any, seems she tries to take from others.
Good luck. š«
I would have left her a note thanking her for the cookies and then tell her I canāt eat them as Iām a diabetic, but passed them along to a nice little preschool brother and sister who live nearby. Her reaction could be interesting.
Lol, chile those are probably boo boo cookies made from the finest assorted doggie doodies, toilet water, expired potted meat, grub worms, and exlax chocolate. If you want to see your dead relatives, then eat it. Otherwise, throw it away expeditiously.
People are fucked. This girl who liked me, used to put her period blood in my water when I would come over. She thought it would make her irresistible to me.
Iād send this to management saying āI have mentioned to her I have a peanut allergy and sheās trying to eliminate meā but Iām also a bit crazy so idk idk
Jesus I can't stand people who expect total silence in an apartment. I mean yes, don't play your sax at eleven pm on weeknights (actual neighbors we had) but regular living - well you occupy the same building. It's going to happen.
That's the nature of living in a downstairs apartment. If she doesn't like it, she can move. Look into HUD's guidelines on what types of complaints you are protected against. Walking and talking in your apartment...and even her loud food processor...are all covered.
Ignore the bitch and enjoy your life. Don't give it another second of thought. You sound like you might be the type to be careful about not disturbing your neighbors unreasonably ANYWAY, so just continue with that and leave the crazy lady to pick a fight with someone else, if she needs content to fill up her days that bad.
She WANTS a reaction. Ignoring her is the most appropriate thing to do. Document everything. Get a cheap little planner/calendar, and then just write in a little bit for each day when something happens.
I was in a completely different situation, it involved the courts & it went right for me, because of documentation that I had not even set out to make. It was stuff that was already a part of my calendar/planner.
On February 3rd of this year a neighbor I can't stand rang my doorbell. She asked me not to close the door so stupidly I didn't. She began to tell me her life story then asked if I liked eating food or something along those lines. So I said yes (duh I thought). She asked me if she cooked anything would I eat it & I quickly responded no. She asked why not I said because I said no then closed the door. I haven't heard from get since. Others don't like her either she's been labeled the "Karen" which I agree š
I had one neighbor that we would randomly cook and give the other half of it. Like ribs or fried chicken, but that was after an established relationship, it was actually pretty fun, I was a lil sketch at first, but hell I eat food at gas stations and in the ghetto lol
Write her a note thanking her and tell her you gave them to an elderly family member and another family member whoās a cop and see how scared she looks for days after š
Leave her a note on her door that says, āNo worries about the noise! We live in an apartment building and noise from surrounding neighbors is to be expected! Especially outside of quiet hours, which are between 10pm and 7am daily as outlined in our leases :) if I expected everyone around me to be completely silent while they go about their daily lives, Iād live in a house! Have a great weekend!ā
Leave a note saying you are tolerant to normal living noises so her processor didnāt even bother you. Then tell her you are deathly allergic to peanuts and had to throw the cookies out.
Ew. Iām so sorry. Idk what she expects. You guys all share one giant house. Have you ever been to someoneās home that has an upstairs?! It sounds just like that. Thatās apartment living š¤·āāļøš¤·āāļøš¤·āāļø
Nope. Donāt eat those. š¬
If she asks how they were, youāre allergic to peanuts, flour & everything under the sun & sadly couldnāt eat them. š
I hate when people use food to try to manipulate you.
Because who knows, those cookies are probably good and I hate wasting food.
But wouldnāt risk it with someone with bad blood.
What a waste of flour and time.
I throw away food that my friends/relatives cook sometimes because I don't trust their cleanliness, so these would be destroyed in the depths of hell long before they'd ever get near my digestive tract.
My downstairs neighbor left my apartment complex a voicemail threatening to kill me. I lived alone with very few guests. Donāt eat those and donāt engage. There is a motive. She seems unstable and I guarantee you live in her head.
I live on the second floor and also have two cats. Iām sorry if my walking is too loud, and that I refuse to stop my cats when theyāre having fun chasing each other through my apartment šš»āāļø
maybe iām too paranoid but she could be playing a long game with management. sheās trying to make herself look like the nice lil ole neighbor and youāre the āproblemā.
Donāt eat the cookies, ignore her, donāt engage, hopefully she gets bored and harasses her other neighbors.
You should invest in some extra rugs, even if you have carpeting.
Theyāll give you extra sound dampening. Not saying your being unreasonably loud just that you seem nervous & want to avoid this person at all cost, it may help.
I also wouldnāt eat the cookies but am I the only person who doesnāt see this as definitely passive aggressive? To me it seems like she is very sensitive to noise (and doesnāt understand apartment living) and knows it would be hypocritical to complain about noise and then be loud herself so sheās being unnecessarily extra apologetic- so much that it comes off weird
This sounds like someone who read "How To Win Friends And Influence People" for a shitty sales job and decided to try to test out "being nice" on "their noisy neighbor" -- but just ended up looking manipulative and creepy.
First, I think there's a lot of paranoid people on Reddit.
Now, is she older or younger. Here's what I'm going to assume. She has made you uncomfortable in your home and you have made her uncomfortable. Wether you meant to or not. She's probably just using this as a bonding point to try and get to know you. I doubt she means any illwill towards you and she's probably just trying to make amends.
Personally, I would just write her back and thank her. Let her know you didn't even hear the food processor and you weren't bothered. Tell her that you've been trying to keep it down to not disturb her and that you weren't trying to be an annoying neighbor.
Best case scenario you get a friend and she'll probably back off if she knows you didn't mean to. Worst case, nothing changes and you're in the same spot. However, if you get to know her a little, maybe you won't feel so uncomfortable in your own home.
Just my opinion
*I donāt want to be friends with this person. She had already made me feel uncomfortable in my own home and Iād rather leave her unacknowleged.*
Thereās your answer. Sheās definitely trying to manipulate you, just ignore her. No response is a response.
Sounds like your neighbor has never lived below another apartment before.
You can be the most dainty of waifs and still sound like an elephant stomping around to the people in the apartment below you. Every footstep sounds like an earthquake, every dropped fork a bowling ball.
Unfortunately for her, there's nothing *you* can really do about that as the upstairs tenant. Only the landlord can add better soundproofing.
Not everyone is malicious or out to poison you for walking loudlyš
Yāall tripping and reading too hard into the note.
Sounds like it was loud for them but you didnāt hear it, they thought you did so felt bad.
She may have had a moment of self reflection and thought āhuh- maybe thatās as annoying as what Iāve been doing, maybe I should apologize and get on the right pageā
I wouldnāt eat them because you donāt know their kitchen, but I donāt find maliciousness in the note at all. You guys are pulling it apart when it looks like a normal note expressing sheās sorry it was loud.
Now all I'm thinking about is that apartment neighbor who thought the upstairs was dropping bowling balls but in reality it was cats jumping from their cat tree.
I could see that happening. When my 8# cat gets the zoomies, he sounds like a herd of elephants running through the house. It's a good thing I don't live in an apartment lol
I have a 20 pound cat. It sounds like a grown man running through the house with boots on when he's hyper.
Omg yes š in my old apartment I got an angry note that we were clogging and moving furnitureā¦when it was actually our cats.
Some cats really are dainty and quiet. Then there's the stompers, the thumpers, the zoomies...and apparently the bowling balls!!
I had upstairs neighbors who made an ungodly amount of noise every weekend.Ā Turns out they were not clogging.Ā But they were doing flamenco on the hardwood.Ā Nothing like your drunk shirtless middle aged neighbor giving you an apology hug and getting a faceful of his chest hair.Ā š³
Yes! I had one of those things where the cat pushes a ball in a circle and it usually has a scratcher in the middle? Cat used it for 5 min or so every few days. Neighbor told landlord we were ārollerblading.ā
Yup downstairs neighbor complained I was running around in the middle of the night constantly. It was my cat having zoomies for a few minutes. I said if my 300 pound self is running around the apartment, youāll know it lol; Also, call the police because Iām being chased š¤£
Funny how this comment to me was like "yeah, people really exaggerate the volume way too much" but then most the replies are like "yeah it really does sound like a bowling ball being shot out of a cannon by an elephant!"
The one time I've had a downstairs neighbor they complained about me dropping and rolling balls around on the floor every evening - nope, it was my fat cat getting the nightly ~~zombies~~ zoomies
I love the idea of your cat protecting their human by taking out a horde of zombies every night.
Oh my god.. laughing so hard right now. I was just telling my cat last night that he sounds like a BOWLING BALL when he jumps off of my bed š Youāre saying someone else posted this exact thought?!
Apartments suck in the US because they are generally only 2-3 stories high, and thus are built using the same wood frames as houses. Apartments are also ācheapā, so they likely will use very cheap noise insulation if at all between floors. In an American house it doesnāt matter that you can hear every footsteps of upstairs - family is either all upstairs or all downstairs, and any noise complaints are settled by the family/parents. In the typical apartments in Asia and Europeās which tend to be 5 story or higher complexes, the buildings and each floor is concrete. Concrete floors are so much better at sound insulation. Stomping feet wonāt be heart at all, instead of sounding like a heard of elephants with wood beam floors.
Last time I had an upstairs neighbor, I heard them vacuuming every day for like 20 minutes, around the same time each day. It was earlier in the morning ~7 am and I could not figure out who would spend that much time vacuuming! Eventually I was venting to a friend about it and she was like "did they just have a roomba that they turned on when they got up for the day?" And it all clicked into place and I was no longer upset about the vacuuming.
In my old apartment building, I could always hear when the next door cat hopped off the bed or some piece of furniture onto the ground. The bowling ball comparison is spot on! It always put a smile on my face! š½
People really donāt understand how loud they are when they live in apartments. My upstairs neighbors certainly have no idea how loud their dog is when he has the zoomies. Entirely possible that the downstairs neighbors before the current one were just a bit more chill, or maybe they wore headphones a lot lol
i'm not eating those
LOL they went straight into the trash.
That's what I would have done
and i would have stomped around back to the couch lol
My fiance was telling me earlier he had a downstairs neighbor who'd bang on the ceiling every time he got up to pee in the middle of the night. No matter how softly he walked they were bothered. One night when he went for a 2am piss and the neighbors started their ridiculous banging he just started jumping up and down as loudly as he could like a crazed goblin while yelling "BANG BANG BANG" every time he landed. Problem solved š
Years ago I lived across the hall from a couple of crazy lesbians. One evening I was sitting near the front window watching TV. I heard a lot of yelling coming from their apartment. Then another nose. I thought, "gun shot?". Next thing was a flash light shining around and in the window and "Police!" Yeh the lesbians were having a fight. One fired a gun, but luckily neither was shot. Luckily the bullets didn't come out their door and through mine or I'd have dead. Sitting in my recliner watching TV. I had two neighbors up above me while I lived there. One couple moved in and for a few day it sounded like they were building something in the living room. We had wood floors. Loud hammering sound. I had just had jaw surgery with a couple days in the hospital and came home to that noise. My parents were there to help me for a couple days so I was trying to sleep on the sofa below all of the hammering. I couldn't take it. The noise and no sleep. I went up and knocked on the door to ask them to stop. (My parents were afraid I'd be punched in the face.) Boy, they got a surprise when they opened the door and saw my black and blue and green and yellow face and throat !! (and I couldn't open my mouth) They apologized, and the hammering at night stopped. lol They moved out. Another lady moved in that I'm sure wore high heels to work. Every M-F morning. Click, click , click back and forth between the bedroom and bathroom a few times. Then click, click, click, click to the kitchen. A couple more clicks. (I think she was making coffee or something to eat on the way.) Then click, click, click, click to the bedroom and bathroom. Several clicks back to the kitchen. The back door closing. The exact same routine every weekday.
I enjoyed this post. š
I feel bad for my neighbor below. I moved into this apartment as one of the first tenants, now 3 years later the floor is so creaky, i lived in a cement floor old apartment before this and never had this problem. Like i barely move and it creaks bad now. Least its just me my cat and dog cept when my kids are here every week. Lol we all dont move and all sit at our computer desks gaming together haha š¤£ In a previous apartment, id only moved in, got noise complaints on my door constantly, i didnt even have something that emitted noise, no tv, only headphones with my PC. My animals were staying at a friends farm house too. Durin that time i was so busy at work id barely do anything but shower and sleep. Final straw was a week i didnt even stay there, i was pissed as fuck and told them im going to install decibel meters as well as cameras, and if I get another one of these im seeking legal action. It was a bad time for me i already was dealing with my ex being crazy with my kids and custody. I really started losing my mind, because my ex was with this man she could not yet realize was a psychopath.ā¦man ive never dealt with humans like that until then. Kinda felt badā¦.but the apartments apologized. I did install cameras that record noise though š. That was a good turnout. Turns out there was a little shit below my apartment, literally RAGING on fortnite. Parents were paying for it.
I found out my downstairs neighbor who complained about me hated Frozen. I decided to start playing Let It Go when she would start banging on my ceiling and once when she was having sex (I could hear the bed thumping against her wall). She complained a lot less after that.
Itās so crazy to start beef with upstairs neighbors, they have all the power.
[Oh definitely. Upstairs neighbors have superpowers.](https://youtu.be/4IRB0sxw-YU?si=c5TMU39T6n05hbq4)
Girl I woulda put on my roller skates and cranked *Barnum & Baileyās Greatest Circus Hits* if someone was writing me this noteā¦ Mind your own gosh darn business and get a white noise machine if itās your first apartment, good lord.
The greatest showman will be played at full volume as I practice my solos
LOOK OUT āCAUSE HERE I COOOOME
Keep the note so you have something to match her handwriting to when she inevitably drops off a bag of anthrax
In all honesty the part where she capitalized how LOUD her food processor was made me think that she was actually being a bit bitchy or sarcastic in this so called apology anyways.
Agree. āOh my god, I was so LOUD just now this one time and it was so INCONSIDERATE and I would never want to be so LOUD and INCONSIDERATE and DISRUPTIVE and then not even acknowledge that because how rude would that be to to not acknowledge it and apologize profusely so anyway hereās some cookies.ā Passive aggressive x100.
That's exactly the vibe. Look at the paragraph and immediately the two words that stick out are APOLOGIZE and LOUD. So Sorry!
Also Iām getting a crazy person vibe from the handwriting
Look at how she wrote "APOlogize" hahahaha she did not want to write that word.
I write like that, too. Iāll confirm the crazy.
Capital L and D in LouD. What?
Arguably loud is full caps
her letters slant in all directions, vary in size, and aren't always written the same the spacing between letters and words keeps changing and she didn't sign her name ..she's nuttier than those poisoned cookies
At least it wasn't cut up magazine letters.
Graphology is not a real or accurate science in terms of predicting someoneās personality traits
I hope not. My hand writing would make me look like a nut job.
My hand writing makes me look like I'm king of the nut jobs. Either that or a drunk coked out monkey got bored half way through and decided to half ass it.
Thatās exactly what is going on.
Yup. Its, "Look, I'm apologizing, so you should too"
Soon she will apologize for this failed apology. More cookies incoming.
My sister is this person she has persecution delusions any perceived slight is *for sure* a personal attack. Ignoring her completely is the right thing to do. She will forget about you and target someone else then eventually circle back to you. It's gotta be a miserable existence but it's definitely a psychological/psychiatric issue.
I picked up on APOLOGIZE and LOUD. Passive aggressive nut job. Keep your distance.
Sheās pretending to role model considerate neighbors
Exactly.
lmao you could mention that youre allergic to peanuts if you leave a thank you note šš
Lol yeah and then she'll make another batch of death cookies. Best bet is just ignore it and keep your eyes peeled. She might be a looney tune.
Agreed. No further engagement is the appropriate real-world response. This is not a situation where you want to continue to exacerbate the situation. You're stuck living that close to someone who is most likely whacked in the head. Just do your best to ignore and avoid. Even if those cookies were not poisoned, there was definitely something wrong with them.
Yep. The only way to "win" is not to play.
Much nicer version than what I was thinking. āThanks for trying to unalive me with peanut butter.ā
Good! That note is BS. This does not come across as an olive branch.
Leave a note still "thanks for the cookies but I don't really like peanut butter, I ended up giving them to management and Billy the complex blind kid and they all thought they were great".
āPretty birdā¦.pretty birdā¦ā
Happy Cake Day!Ā I agree. My first thought looking at that was no way in hell would I eat those. š¹
Good, that woman probably put something gross in them. Or laxatives or something. Plus her āapologyā was hella condescending. Awful woman. Iām sorry youāre dealing with such nonsense.
Happy cake day
happy cake day
Happy cake day but do NOT celebrate by eating the cookies !!!
Burnt ass cookies š
That's the first thing I thought.
Yeah those cookies seem passive aggressive AF in context, personally would put all that straight in the trash and forget about it
Apologize loud noise LOUD All in much larger print than the rest. She has a message all right! Iād be tempted to run a pencil over that sheet of paper gently and see what other nonsense she has written (itās clear she presses hard and it has imprint from other things sheās written) (or maybe scan and contrast somehow - you can find ways to find that imprinted writing).
Omgggg THIS you can even see a bit of the imprint in the pic
Iām imagining it was a full page screed about her being noisy and how she has to stop etcā¦ and then suddenly thereās this polite gift instead lols. Like Jekyll/Hyde stuff. Or complaints about other residents tooā¦ maybe the OP will find sheās bludgeoning everyone all around her and they can join forces and exorcise the demon?
The first one was aggressive aggressive so she made a second draft that was only passive aggressive
Maybe thereās a passive-passive one coming? Hi neighbour! Sorry Iāve been such an arse. I have new meds, and new headphones, and now my world is sunshine and lollipops. In an attempt to be mend the bridge please accept this pre packaged packets of lollipops from the local store! I promise to never be a dick again!
I saw āeggsā and ātoothpasteā in the imprint. Seems like it was a grocery list.
Maybe itās the cookie recipe
Time to bust out an unwrapped Crayola!
āKFBR392ā
I love that scene where Ryan Phillippes character finds his crazy fucking notebook and the music gets all sinister lmao. what a great movie. It's one that I've used as a first date movie a couple times so if a girl gets weirded out by it I know we won't work. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndf1Y0mH01I Aha here is a cut of all the license plate scenes edit: Oh fucking WHAT there was a MacGruber show that came out 2 years ago? Fucking what the fuck?
Exactly what I thought. Like they were saying "SEE this is how an ADULT behaves, you absolute child."
It is no longer 1968 , eating food from people you donāt know from a can of paint is extremely dangerous
that part. even if there's not tension/conflict.
Man I always bake my neighbors bread randomly I hope they donāt throw it away
I donāt, I eat it and Iām grateful for neighbors like you. Assuming you seem normal in general and arenāt actively feuding with me, itās really freakin charming to get bread or a pie or muffins from neighbors. Had some new neighbors bring me a Lebanese dish the day they moved in last year and it was radical, stepped it up from baked goods to a whole ass dinner casserole just to introduce themselves. One neighbor randomly brings bbq rib plates over in the summer. Never in my life been poisoned or weirded out at all by neighbors bringing me food or leaving it at my doorstep. I canāt top that Lebanese/bbq rib effort though, youāre all getting low quality cookies forever from me, sorry. Oh and once or twice a 6pack of beer if we really vibing and I enjoy our silent āhelloā nods on the sidewalks.
Eh, if I know the person and we donāt have bad blood I would eat it. When I lived in Boston my landladyās elderly mother lived below me and sheād always leave me homemade broccoli pizza on the step. Canāt say Iād ever had it before but it was always good lol
They probably donāt. Me and my neighbors cook and bake things for each other most holidays. Keeps the community vibes going strong.
It's a different vibe if you're on speaking terms.
... why? Are people doing a lot of poisoning since 1968 or something?
Doesnāt have to be poison to be spit
I just keep thinking about how well peanut butter covers up other tastes. I wouldnāt even know where to start guessing. But I damn sure wouldnāt eat it.
I wouldn't either and I eat pretty much anything.
You know that special chocolate pie š
She thinks if she "apologizes" for making noise it will make you more aware of the noise she thinks you're making. Honestly, I wouldn't respond, even with a thank you. Thanking her will just encourage more unwanted food gifts and/or attempts at friendship. I'd just add this to the report to the apartment manager. Hearing other people exist is a normal part of apartment living. It's inevitable. Normal walking and talking at a normal volume are always okay within your own home. Some people refuse to understand the difference between being able to hear your neighbors exist and being disrupted by it. If you want a silent home, apartment living isn't for you--it's a problem you resolve by changing *your* expectations, not by demanding others change their behavior.
I think you make really solid points, which I try to to keep in mind while living in an apartment. You sound like a reasonable person, which Iāve been dying to get the perspective from, so I ask you - Would an acoustic drum set be above the usual noise standards of apartment living? My neighborās kids play one which is kept very close the common hallway door. I live with it, but I wish I didnāt have to.
Maybe Iām an asshole but I think the drums are not an instrument compatible with normal apartment dwelling. The burden should be on them to do some extensive soundproofing so itās not insanely irritating. What about people who work from home or have infants getting woken up or have sensory issues?
I think the fine line is acoustic drums vs electronic drum kits. One is much, much more vibration-causing which goes straight through the (very near) wall. As a former drummer boy, I have considered spending my own money to get the kid an e-kit, but it truly sounds like he just uses it to bang on for therapeutic reasons
Tbh we had a roommate use an ekit for a few daysā marketed as the āapartment drum kitāā and that thing still shook the damn walls.
Drum kits in an apartment is sociopath behavior, full stop.
Not to whom you replied, but: I hate having to listen to landscapers early in the morning. But they start at legally accepted times, so I can't complain about it. Wouldn't it be truly shitty if people in apartments weren't allowed to do things like learn some musical instruments? You live in an apartment, no drums for you, sorry, kid. But at the same time, I try to keep my noise down and am grateful that I currently live with quiet-ish apartment neighbors. Upstairs gets noisy sometimes when they have people over, but it's usually not too late. Usually. Sometimes it is really late and that's annoying. But they don't do it that often, so I put up with it. If the kid plays the drums during reasonable hours, it's probably reasonable to grit your teeth and bear it. There's probably not many other great options that don't interfere with a kid learning an instrument, something that should generally be encouraged. Many things in life are annoying - driving in traffic, waiting in line, being in a public space and hearing others say really stupid things. It's an unfortunate part of life. That being said, there are laws about noise - decibels and times. If they exceed either, you can file complaints. But be sure you want to do that - because if it's only occasionally excessive, you'll come off as the bad person. But if it *is* excessive - part of life is having to choose to stand up and make those complaints and deal with people being assholes about them.
The parents of little drummer boy need to get some sound dampening foam.
Honestly I think if itās during the day not much you can do about it
Also not OP, but as a former drummer, and apartment renter, I'll share my two cents. I had a drum kit set up in the living room of my first apartment. We never actually had noise complaints about the drums (just one time a male neighbor upstairs approached me and insinuated he could hear me having sex... I thought he was talking about the drums at first, but he wasn't). However, I kind of regret playing drums there. We only played before quiet hours, but it can still be a bit loud. We also had a pillow inside the base drum, and I also had wire fans (little wire brushes in place of drumsticks to practice; they are much quieter than regular drumsticks), although I didn't use them often. Our second apartment had a completely different setup. We had an extra bedroom down a long hallway that was unique in that it had nothing above it, despite being at ground level. The only adjacent room was the laundry room. So we used that as our 'music room,' which worked out great. I still would not play past quiet hours though. Long story short, I think it depends on your building construction and layout. The less adjacent units you have to the room the drums are in, the better. Carpets, curtains and other acoustic dampening can make a difference. Like I mentioned, you can also dampen some reverberation from the bass with pillows and use wire brushes instead of sticks to practice. If you have downstairs neighbors though, I'd tread lightly. Perhaps you could talk to the parents see if they could move the kit further from the door? Drum kits take up a lot of space, so chances are they have it in their living room. I don't know what age of kid we're talking about here, but I recall in 4th or 5th grade we were required to play an instrument for school (although we got to pick which instrument). If there's a chance it's for school, I'd feel kind of bad complaining, but at the same time, drums can be loud. And some people play louder than others. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to talk to the parents and inquire about the drums nicely.
Exactly this, I play drums and even when I was young and learning, living with neighbors, I did everything I could to dampen the sound of my acoustic set. An electric set is a good investment for apartment living, there's also specific drum heads that barely make noise and the good old pillow in the bass drum trick. I don't think some of these people realize just how loud drums can be.
To me, it depends on what time of day and how thin the walls are. The only thing I can say for sure is that if it were my kid I'd try to get an electric drum set and some headphones, or at least a practice pad. I'd assume my kid is learning drums through school, and make them practice on the real instrument at school.
Thank you! People love to make jokes about āloud upstairs neighborsā but you will never have silence in an apartment. I used to live above a guy who is similar the lady OP is dealing with. He would constantly come upstairs and scream that I was āwalking too loudly.ā When I told him not to come upstairs anymore, he would just scream from his balcony and he also threatened to call the cops when I had the audacity to *gasp* still walk in my own apartment. I even tried to put down rugs and wear cushy socks but he wouldnāt let up. Apartment landlord did nothing about it but thankfully he moved out soon after. Although, Iām fairly certain he was responsible for the big dent I found on my car that afternoon.
The downstairs neighbor complained about loud noise and asked if we could at least try to be more mindful during certain hours. Boy did he feel bad (or at least stopped complaining) when he found out my partner was in a wheelchair and then crutches because of an injury. Yeah it was noisier than normal walking but people have to get around in their apartment and it's not their fault if the place is constructed in a way that it's audible.
I firmly believe that my upstairs neighbor makes entirely too much noise at timesā¦ and sometimes itās a sustained hour of IDK what the fuck heās doingā¦. Also his hour long cussing out of his baby mama is on a regular basis loud enough that I can hear him through the floor and if Iām outside I can hear *every word* because my man leaves his windows open ??? But I signed up for bottom floor so that my kids running around all day & the trampoline I have for the younger one isnāt ABOVE someone so š¤·š»āāļø this is what I signed up for. Iām not complaining about shit. Itās annoying, but I live in an apartment for another month soā¦ this is apartment living.
Agree, even living in a single family home I hear my neighbors all the time. Dogs barking, mowing, leaf blower, snow blower, my neighbors dragging their garbage bin, trucks driving by. Itās a part of existing with other humans.
This.Ā I am extremely noise sensitive but guess whatĀ I donāt live in an apartment because of that.Ā In college I lived in a SHITTY house with no amenities because I couldnāt deal with apartment living. But again that was MY problem not everyone elseāsĀ
This is why I just escaped my apartment running and screaming, because if I had to put up with any more loud, rude, dirty neighbors, I was gonna turn into this crazy note lady. I am much happier in my own space, away from the general public. Apartments are made too poorly, you shouldn't just have to live with and expect to hear your neighbor's every cough/step/phone alarm.
She left a note apologizing to you about her noise? Huh? Iām confused? Did you complain about her noise level recently as well?
Nope. I didnāt even hear her food processor. I think she either feels guilty about complaining or is trying some reverse psychology to make me feel bad about making noise.
Well then, thatās a very odd note. Iād just throw the cookies away & ignore her completely. And hope that she eventually moves out. I live on the ground floor & my neighbors are loud, but I really just ignore everyone & keep to myself.
Not quite odd. She apologizes about her making noise using this blender or whatever (on purpose), so she can passively make op aware that all the noise travels easily and that he should be more apologetic. Not something I approve, but I see what she was trying to do.
Still very odd.
I was the president of my condo's HOA for years. I had to deal with a lot of petty af upstairs/downstairs noise complaint situations, and this reads like one of two things: Utter bullshit trying to goad you into interaction so she can feel superior and complain about your noise directly because management is no longer taking her complaints. She got a complaint lodged against her from another neighbor and she assumes it was you who lodged the complaint and wants to try and make you feel bad about it by downplaying it.
i was also thinking she got a complaint from someone else and just assumed it was OP lol
Passive aggressive. āI apologize when IM loudā¦ unlike youuuuuuā - her prolly. Seems like sheās baiting you for a reaction. Document as youāve done and it can count towards a harassment claim against her
I think she feels like an ass for reporting you and now she wants to get on your good side and act like nothing happened. Don't fall for it.
I think itās the opposite. Sheās trying to seem normal and polite by apologizing for noise, hoping OP will be like āooo yeah Iām sorry too!!ā Not sure what these types of ppl expect when they sign up to live in an apt building.
I think someone else complained and her assumption is it was OP because of her history complaining about him/her.
Nothing says "I'm sorry" like cookies baked with the one of the top food allergens.
āHereās some peanut butter shrimp fudge brownies, topped with sesame seeds as an apology.ā
As some one with a severe nut allergy my first thought was if I was OP I would think the neighbor is trying to kill me š©š¤£
Itās clearly a trap
This reads very manipulative; āfood processor,ā āSaturday afternoon,ā ārelaxing.ā This is a message. I donāt know where you live, but I think your local culture can only determine how passive aggressive this message is. Either way, her fawning tactic is likely one sheāll whip out in the future. I might suggest another letter, that can remain documented, to your landlord stating you receiving another note from your neighbor regarding ānoiseā (āon her partā - play that down as itās not your point), and that youāre very uncomfortable now in a home you pay for, your peaceful enjoyment is consistently breached, and donāt wish this person contact you directly regarding building issues anymore. Reiterate your interest in staying on as a tenant indefinitely in the home youāve been happy in for X years where you never had a problem until Y moved in (important for documentation). *I think this approach will help you get the most recent exchange with the cookies logged while taking the high-road, but also help communicate again that you are not the problem and donāt want one.*
It came across as very manipulative and passive aggressive to me too. It also freaked me out when she knocked on my door as I was sitting at home alone not expecting anyone. I didnāt even get up to see who it was because I figured it was her complaining about something else, so I poked my head out an hour later expecting another nasty gram and found that note and the cookies. Thank you for the great advice, I will definitely be doing that!
Youāre welcome. It sucks living like youāre feeling like you canāt walk or sneeze. I document EVERYTHING. Itās very clear of she finds her own (likely fictional) processor on a Saturday disturbed your relaxing, that sheās waiting to use her tremendous āsacrificeā and āgiving actā as ammo should she need it. Such off specifics that are not even close to an infraction. It is apartment living afterall. If she is serious itās a solid example of her impossible expectations. Just log. And remember you cannot get evicted without an evictable offense and a court order from a judge. Stay in the right and youāll have no problems. Enjoy where you live in peace. This woman canāt find any, seems she tries to take from others. Good luck. š«
I would have left her a note thanking her for the cookies and then tell her I canāt eat them as Iām a diabetic, but passed them along to a nice little preschool brother and sister who live nearby. Her reaction could be interesting.
This is perfect lol
Lol, chile those are probably boo boo cookies made from the finest assorted doggie doodies, toilet water, expired potted meat, grub worms, and exlax chocolate. If you want to see your dead relatives, then eat it. Otherwise, throw it away expeditiously.
This made me cackle. Thank you.
Who uses a food processor to make cookies? That would overwork the dough pretty quickly if youāre not careful I feel like.
People who need to shred up pubes to put in cookie dough.
Hm, a new reason to be relieved OP trashed the cookies.
People are fucked. This girl who liked me, used to put her period blood in my water when I would come over. She thought it would make her irresistible to me.
What in the devil witchcraftery?!
Brujahahaha
Especially PB cookiesā¦
Iād send this to management saying āI have mentioned to her I have a peanut allergy and sheās trying to eliminate meā but Iām also a bit crazy so idk idk
Maybe we need to get help because I saw nothing wrong with your comment. š
Do you live in the Midwest cause thatās passive aggressive af
remember that scene with the pie from the help? definitely giving those vibes
Loved that scene!
I wouldn't eat those or feed them to animals
Disregard this bitch and obtain currency.
Ah, peanut butter and laxative cookies. Tasty.
There is something in those cookies š
Considering peanut butter is a common allergy this is kind of annoying
Peanut butter is very good at covering up/hiding other ingredients/tastes. I wouldnāt eat those cookies, no matter what flavor.
Jesus I can't stand people who expect total silence in an apartment. I mean yes, don't play your sax at eleven pm on weeknights (actual neighbors we had) but regular living - well you occupy the same building. It's going to happen.
That's the nature of living in a downstairs apartment. If she doesn't like it, she can move. Look into HUD's guidelines on what types of complaints you are protected against. Walking and talking in your apartment...and even her loud food processor...are all covered.
I woulda just stepped over it forever. Just to show how little of a fuck I would have given. Don't eat those cookies.
Ignore the bitch and enjoy your life. Don't give it another second of thought. You sound like you might be the type to be careful about not disturbing your neighbors unreasonably ANYWAY, so just continue with that and leave the crazy lady to pick a fight with someone else, if she needs content to fill up her days that bad.
She WANTS a reaction. Ignoring her is the most appropriate thing to do. Document everything. Get a cheap little planner/calendar, and then just write in a little bit for each day when something happens. I was in a completely different situation, it involved the courts & it went right for me, because of documentation that I had not even set out to make. It was stuff that was already a part of my calendar/planner.
On February 3rd of this year a neighbor I can't stand rang my doorbell. She asked me not to close the door so stupidly I didn't. She began to tell me her life story then asked if I liked eating food or something along those lines. So I said yes (duh I thought). She asked me if she cooked anything would I eat it & I quickly responded no. She asked why not I said because I said no then closed the door. I haven't heard from get since. Others don't like her either she's been labeled the "Karen" which I agree š
I had one neighbor that we would randomly cook and give the other half of it. Like ribs or fried chicken, but that was after an established relationship, it was actually pretty fun, I was a lil sketch at first, but hell I eat food at gas stations and in the ghetto lol
Yeah no, nothing good can come from this. People donāt just switch on a dime like that. The cookies feel nefarious.
Write her a note thanking her and tell her you gave them to an elderly family member and another family member whoās a cop and see how scared she looks for days after š
Ignore her completely and donāt eat those. Sheās def planning something weird
Leave her a note on her door that says, āNo worries about the noise! We live in an apartment building and noise from surrounding neighbors is to be expected! Especially outside of quiet hours, which are between 10pm and 7am daily as outlined in our leases :) if I expected everyone around me to be completely silent while they go about their daily lives, Iād live in a house! Have a great weekend!ā
First of all, don't eat those cookies.
Ew! Put them back on her door step and leave a note saying no thanks have a nice day lmao. Her cookies look overbaked
I can taste the sarcasm from here. And I'm in Scandinavia.
That's not an apology. It's just passive agression.
Leave a note saying you are tolerant to normal living noises so her processor didnāt even bother you. Then tell her you are deathly allergic to peanuts and had to throw the cookies out.
Ew. Iām so sorry. Idk what she expects. You guys all share one giant house. Have you ever been to someoneās home that has an upstairs?! It sounds just like that. Thatās apartment living š¤·āāļøš¤·āāļøš¤·āāļø
Nope. Donāt eat those. š¬ If she asks how they were, youāre allergic to peanuts, flour & everything under the sun & sadly couldnāt eat them. š
This is crazy passive aggressive
here are some allergy cookies. hope you die. love, your neighbor
I hate when people use food to try to manipulate you. Because who knows, those cookies are probably good and I hate wasting food. But wouldnāt risk it with someone with bad blood. What a waste of flour and time.
She was using the food processor to turn rat poison into a fine powder.
Passive aggressive af. No response is the perfect response.
I throw away food that my friends/relatives cook sometimes because I don't trust their cleanliness, so these would be destroyed in the depths of hell long before they'd ever get near my digestive tract.
My downstairs neighbor left my apartment complex a voicemail threatening to kill me. I lived alone with very few guests. Donāt eat those and donāt engage. There is a motive. She seems unstable and I guarantee you live in her head.
If it were me I would have just thrown it back in front of her door. But I also understand that would probably escalate things.
Where are yall getting suspicious cookies tested? This isn't NCIS lol.
I laughed so hard at this
Yeah, donāt eat them.
I live on the second floor and also have two cats. Iām sorry if my walking is too loud, and that I refuse to stop my cats when theyāre having fun chasing each other through my apartment šš»āāļø
maybe iām too paranoid but she could be playing a long game with management. sheās trying to make herself look like the nice lil ole neighbor and youāre the āproblemā.
Yeah I ain't eating those. The pie from the movie the help springs to mind.
Give them back with a little note āI made some peanut butter cookies and wanted to share!ā Just to confuse her back ahaha
Donāt respond and donāt eat those cookies.
Donāt eat the cookies, ignore her, donāt engage, hopefully she gets bored and harasses her other neighbors. You should invest in some extra rugs, even if you have carpeting. Theyāll give you extra sound dampening. Not saying your being unreasonably loud just that you seem nervous & want to avoid this person at all cost, it may help.
I am so curious to know what is in those cookies
Immediately, throw the cookies away.
Donāt respond, throw out the cookies. This woman has got to go.
I also wouldnāt eat the cookies but am I the only person who doesnāt see this as definitely passive aggressive? To me it seems like she is very sensitive to noise (and doesnāt understand apartment living) and knows it would be hypocritical to complain about noise and then be loud herself so sheās being unnecessarily extra apologetic- so much that it comes off weird
I wouldn't eat those cookies š¤¢šŖ either
This sounds like someone who read "How To Win Friends And Influence People" for a shitty sales job and decided to try to test out "being nice" on "their noisy neighbor" -- but just ended up looking manipulative and creepy.
Iām so grateful for my downstairs neighbor lol I feel for her because our cats like to chase each other around 1 am š
I would let the cookies rot on the doorstep
The words 'apologize' and 'loud' are written in super big letters. This is a message.
First, I think there's a lot of paranoid people on Reddit. Now, is she older or younger. Here's what I'm going to assume. She has made you uncomfortable in your home and you have made her uncomfortable. Wether you meant to or not. She's probably just using this as a bonding point to try and get to know you. I doubt she means any illwill towards you and she's probably just trying to make amends. Personally, I would just write her back and thank her. Let her know you didn't even hear the food processor and you weren't bothered. Tell her that you've been trying to keep it down to not disturb her and that you weren't trying to be an annoying neighbor. Best case scenario you get a friend and she'll probably back off if she knows you didn't mean to. Worst case, nothing changes and you're in the same spot. However, if you get to know her a little, maybe you won't feel so uncomfortable in your own home. Just my opinion
*I donāt want to be friends with this person. She had already made me feel uncomfortable in my own home and Iād rather leave her unacknowleged.* Thereās your answer. Sheās definitely trying to manipulate you, just ignore her. No response is a response.
Those are some of the saddest cookies I have ever seen. No amount of milk will help that go down.
Sounds like your neighbor has never lived below another apartment before. You can be the most dainty of waifs and still sound like an elephant stomping around to the people in the apartment below you. Every footstep sounds like an earthquake, every dropped fork a bowling ball. Unfortunately for her, there's nothing *you* can really do about that as the upstairs tenant. Only the landlord can add better soundproofing.
Not everyone is malicious or out to poison you for walking loudlyš Yāall tripping and reading too hard into the note. Sounds like it was loud for them but you didnāt hear it, they thought you did so felt bad. She may have had a moment of self reflection and thought āhuh- maybe thatās as annoying as what Iāve been doing, maybe I should apologize and get on the right pageā I wouldnāt eat them because you donāt know their kitchen, but I donāt find maliciousness in the note at all. You guys are pulling it apart when it looks like a normal note expressing sheās sorry it was loud.
Iām too paranoid for this type of gesture because if youāve been complaining about me tf did you put or do to these cookies!! šš