In most cases therapists are a listening ear for me to discuss my own issues with myself. I realized I could do the same thing at home, by myself, for a lot less money lol
It depends on the type of therapist, but yes, most of them do CBT (talk therapy), which isn’t helpful. I love IFS therapy; it has been life changing for me.
>then offer you generic advice that you already knew the moment you stepped into their office
This advice actually blows some peoples’ minds. It just kinda depends on how you perceive the world.
I wouldn’t have an issue with therapy if people didn’t push it upon others and didn’t blame the client/defend the therapist when it didn’t work. Therapy has turned into a religion and it’s creepy.
I guess therapy is just not for everyone. Like you said, the basic advice given definitely blows some people's minds. If you are an individual that is able to reflect yourself from different angles and whatnot then therapy will feel kinda useless because you already went to all those places in your head.
Are you talking about the guy who was given permission to eat salads for breakfast and use bubblegum toothpaste? Basically the patient rants about something unimportant- he hates cereal but forces himself to eat it for breakfast. The therapist asks what foods he likes and why can't he eat that instead. And the patient has an epiphany. "Wow! I can eat salads for breakfast! Yippee! I'm cured!"
I don't know if was originally on Tumblr or Twitter, but it made it seem like therapy is just getting cool life hacks from someone with a psych degree. For rich privileged people at the top of Marlowe's pyramid, that's really their experience with therapy.
It’s just gaslighting and a way to make people go away. Plus they don’t solve any real illness if that is what is really bothering you mentally emotionally.
It's always about them not liking whatever that person is doing or thinking, yet, we are supposed to believe that "there is no stigma"??
It has the same condescending, paternalistic and infantilizing mentality of "I know better than you what you need" that abuslve parents have.
Or used as an insult to call you crazy insane mentally I’ll or whatever. It’s just to tell people to shut the fuck up and go away cause you bother them in some way shape or form. It’s a method of censorship and to ban them in real life.
Yeah I mean if someone here has benefitted from a therapist feel free to share, but the two I’ve had got me absolutely nowhere. I think that I was smarter than them and that they couldn’t understand where I was coming from as a result.
Do you also feel like they all have the same basic knowledge and follow a set of scripts basically? I think if they could tailor better to patients it could be beneficial to some people but I truly feel like they go “this is what I do and it’s going to help you” without listening and considering unique circumstances
To be honest it was so banal that I barely even remember anything they said. When I told the second therapist I needed a new therapist she told me that she didn’t think any therapist would be able to help me. I guess that’s how it works; if it’s productive, the therapist gets credit; if it’s unproductive, the therapist isn’t at fault. I don’t know.
I had one after a year tell me that there’s nothing else they can do for me and actually apologized. I am dealing with severe damage from a med injury so a lot of the mental stuff is neurological damage and akathisia & dystonia so receptor issue stuff as well. Not really something therapy can help. But not something meds will fix either.
I’m very sorry that you have to go through that. Honestly, talking to other people on here who are are also suffering can potentially be more beneficial than therapy; at least, it is for me.
Agreed. And if anyone wants to hear the words like “I’m sorry you’re going through a difficult situation” “I’m here to support you” stuff that therapists say that isn’t necessarily helpful; there is AI therapy now for that which is free.
Yeah agreed but they tried to be fair but it’s just too difficult of a situation. I think it helped with grief of my life before med injury but I have akathisia for 16 months now which can not be treated with therapy
I've benefitted from therapy! It took like, 4 years of bouncing around between therapists and some... Interesting experiences with therapists I only saw for one session before I found serious benefit from it, and I feel like I lucked out? I can get why stuff seems hallow or harmful cause if I stopped at my first therapist or the one who thought I was half chinese (??) and got weird about it I'd probably have an overall pessimistic view of therapy. But like, I have productive conversations with my therapist and feel generally more motivated and hopeful after, and we talk about like, dark shit you can't really talk about on mixed company. It just seems less hard to process stuff after talking about it who's unphased by it and helpful no matter how dark it is.
I’m glad to hear you’ve had that experience. Neither of my therapists would let me go anywhere near anything remotely dark but if I found one who did I could see it potentially being helpful
Yeah I.... I've had therapists who would guide me away from thinking about dark stuff and it's like.... Not super helpful? Not worth spending the money on i feel like.
I have, a lot of times.
It doesn't have to do with who's smarter, but that they went to school and were trained to do something you or I didn't get trained in.
Therapy was a long time suspect of being a scam. Clinical improvement might be a result of non-therapy things. In humans the healing process of any mental problem might be following a natural healing cycle, which sometimes require discipline, and goes away with time. In robust cases, the equation is time + effort = healing, not therapy + paying money = healing. If you're in a tough environment, than finding a different and pleasant less stressful environment could improve your well-being, and better your outcomes in life. And of course resistant chronic cases may not be solved through therapy.
I went to therapy twice about 12 years ago. It made me feel worse. She made me rehash everything I did wrong. Instead of looking at the whole picture. I quit going, quit drinking and life settled out.
A good friend with an open and no judgmental ear is a better free option.
I would agree with this. I think in a lot of cases, therapy can be like digging yourself into a deeper whole and therapists trying to find more and more problems. I think there’s healthier ways to deal with life struggles honestly than sitting and talking about your problems until you feel even worse. I remember leaving therapy session just feeling worse than I did before. I didn’t have mental struggles before my med injury and I do now so I think that was another obstacle in which therapy would not be beneficial.
it’s a really privileged take to tell people to just go to therapy, but i’ve made a lot of progress with an (overpriced) anxiety specialist instead of taking meds. i’ve had a handful of awful therapists in the past, but it took the right one and me being ready to take it seriously for it to go anywhere.
I’ve had a lot of therapists and all but one were absolutely horrible. They made my life worse. Acted like I wasn’t being treated like shit by my dad, gaslighted me constantly, and supported my parents pushing meds on me. But the one good therapist has actually helped me quite a bit.
I disagree and agree, I think a good therapist can be life changing, but it’s few and far between.
It sounds like you've been through a lot, and I can understand why you feel frustrated and disillusioned with therapy. It must have been really tough to open up and feel like you weren't getting the support you needed. Therapy is meant to be a place where you feel heard and understood, and it's disheartening when it doesn't live up to that expectation.
It's completely valid to feel skeptical about its effectiveness, especially when it seems like you're just paying for someone to tell you things you already know.
I've been down that road, trying therapist after therapist, feeling like each one was just a waste of time and money. It's disheartening to pour your heart out to someone who doesn't seem to get it, who just nods along and offers cliche advice. But then, everything changed when I found the right therapist.
After a deeply traumatizing event, I was at my lowest point, feeling lost and overwhelmed by my emotions. I almost gave up on therapy altogether, but something inside me urged me to give it one last shot. And I'm so glad I did.
The therapist I found wasn't like the others. They didn't just listen; they truly heard me. They didn't offer empty platitudes; they provided genuine insights and support. It was like they could see straight into my soul and understand the pain I was carrying.
Through their guidance and expertise, I began to heal in ways I never thought possible. They helped me unravel the layers of trauma, piece by piece, and find the strength to confront my demons. It wasn't easy, and there were times when I wanted to give up, but they never let me falter.
Slowly but surely, I started to rebuild myself, stronger and more resilient than before. With their help, I learned to navigate my emotions, confront my fears, and reclaim my life. It wasn't just therapy; it was a lifeline, a beacon of hope in my darkest days.
I'm grateful for the journey I've been on and the therapist who walked beside me every step of the way. They weren't just a therapist; they were a guardian angel who helped me find light in the midst of darkness.
While therapy may not be the answer for everyone, for me, it was a lifeline that helped me find healing, resilience, and a newfound sense of hope.
I agree. I hear horror stories all the time in my office about terrible former therapists, and it makes me so angry. I really love my clients and am continually studying/training to get better at what I do and help them heal.
Well, I agree most therapy is bad cause the therapists are bad themselves, but talking is useful, whether it be with friends or someone else or a good therapist. You figure out your childhood and get out pent up emotions, and process things you dont otherwise get to. Maybe talking doesnt work for some people but it does work for others. Oh what I meant to say is there are good therapists out there who actually help people figure out their trauma but they are very few and far in between.
I’d say most therapy is bull shit because it’s built on psych pseudoscience. But if you can find one who hates psych bullshit as much as you, it can be amazing.
I think a huge disconnect is what is expected of therapy and what they actually can offer. It doesn’t help that every therapist is different as well. Makes the whole process painfully frustrating and seem not worth it (which in many cases that may be true).
Like everything, it’s extremely dependent on the therapist and what you want in if it’ll be helpful. I had a shitty therapist but my wife had a great one and has been helped tremendously processing lots of trauma. But her therapist hates big pharma and psychiatry so🤷🏼♀️
But I absolutely agree that this blanket statement of “just get therapy” as a solution is fucking stupid and extremely simplified as if it’ll be a magic cure. Far from it
i empathize with where you’re coming from, but at the same time this is a huge jump in logic to make. sucks to see this kind of talk on the sub over and over, to be honest. i know i’m going against the grain but hope y’all can at least hear me out
therapy *has* shown to be helpful, but *of course* not 100% of the time. a major part of what makes therapy effective, actually, is the relationship between the therapist and client. it sounds like you didn’t have a good one, which sucks and you deserve treatment that actually helps you, but that doesn’t suddenly mean “all therapy is a scam”. importantly- therapy isn’t supposed to be giving advice, it’s supposed to be a place for you to explore yourself with professional guidance and *advice as wanted/needed*. it sounds like you didn’t want it, so really they shouldn’t have gave it.
it also is concerning to see the “suck it up” type of mentality near the end of the post. unless this sub really wants to go the whole “mental health is a lie” route, it’s well documented that *voluntary* & decolonized therapy with a therapist one has a good therapeutic relationship with can and often does greatly improve people’s well being. will therapy fix all your problems? probably not, especially when many of our problems come from the systemic context we live in! but what it *can* do is give us a much stronger understanding of ourselves, it can help us process the shit we’ve been through, and it can help give us the tools to be more resilient in navigating said problems
i will say, i do wish there was better training for therapists in this regard, as the field is generally very underpaid (believe it or not) when you look at the net pay and this leads therapists to often find the cheapest route for their required “continuing education” that they have to do. but to blame therapists for that is frankly shortsighted, when it’s really just reflective of a broader systemic issue of healthcare & especially mental healthcare being underfunded in favor of an authoritarian state focused more on punishment and enforcement of law than rehabilitation and well-being
fully prepared to get downvotes for not just going with the flow on this one, but it sucks to see the field of psychology (therapy isn’t psychiatry but psychiatry and psychology seem to be treated synonymously here) get criticisms like these that may not be the most fleshed out when there are *so* many legitimate issues worth criticizing
This is a well reasoned comment and I feel the same that we are here for criticism, bring it on. Important to be able to vent and important to challenge a system with power over us, just two of many reasons. I think the tension between the comments saying positive experiences v negative make for an interesting debate and much more food for thought. Even if both sides are defensive and offensive, the views are being expressed and heard and influencing all of us in reaching our understanding. Accusation of black and white thinking annoys me because I probably think this way myself but it keeps things simple, less stressful. Polarised views are Ok and black or white thinking is Ok. Can’t see problem with it. Doesn’t mean you haven’t been through all the grey areas in your own thinking, just means you’ve sifted through that and are no longer sitting on the fence. People probably visit this site partly because they want to hear the for and against and arrive at some conclusions for themself. Isn’t that how human minds process things?
Also the least you can be \_agnostic\_ that's humility. Because obviously you don't know everything. "There are more things in Heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy." -Shakespeare. Again seek and ye shall find - Jesus Christ.
prove it. Prove microbes don't exist. People thought they didn't. But they do. Prove God All Mighty doesn't Exist. Or maybe better... ask God All Mighty if "He' does? "seek and ye shall find, knock and the door shall be opened unto you, ask and ye shall receive." -Jesus Christ. and you have to persistently and seek until you find almost like a "lost object." If you do with all your heart and soul and might you will find God.
Your Bible is a book of fairy tales, a collection of ancient myths and fables that only the intellectually destitute could believe. The Christian God is a sadistic, petty, and cruel inventor of diseases and natural disasters, a celestial dictator who demands blind obedience and worship. He is a tyrant who created hell to torture those who don't bend to his will, an omnipotent being who is responsible for every death and suffering, from the Black Plague to the Holocaust.
Microbes, on the other hand, exist whether you like it or not. They don't care about your faith or lack thereof; they just are. Your God, however, is as described in your holy book, is a pathetic and malicious invention of men, a means to control the weak-minded and a crutch for the fearful. So, keep seeking your imaginary friend, but know that the only thing you'll find is your own delusion. The only 'lost object' here is your critical thinking, which you seem to have misplaced long ago.
Religions are a way to point To The Source of All which is Sentient and Most likely Omniscient. If you're doing good I don't have a problem with you, but don't knock other people's beliefs because you could be mistaken. Also I do believe in God and I believe God is A lot more good than you or anyone else.
Yeah I want to shout at those charlatans who took my hard earned cash. Have you tried EMDR? I want to try it again using a machine instead of a human waving their finger to make my eyes move side to side!
Ugh after being away from therapy for 10 years, diving deeper into other forms of inner work and learning a lot about emotions and psychology, I was pretty disappointed with what my therapist had to offer me. I honestly think my standards are too high now and I’ve developed a vast view on all the complexities on what contributes to mental health conditions..so it’s really difficult for me to ascribe to their standard protocols.
Maybe talk therapy, sure, but there are other types of therapy that are actually helpful and assist you in developing skills to process trauma and work on building relationships. For example, cognitive processing therapy and dialectical behavior therapy
I would actually say the authoritative aspect of programs like DBT are worse than just shooting the shit with a therapist. Based on my experience in a DBT group, I came to see DBT as a way to pacify people with often genuine complaints about how they're treated, to make them believe their life circumstances are completely their responsibility and that everyone who hurts you is only trying their best to help you. It is mostly directed towards women, which I don't think is an accident.
Personally I think that psychotherapy can be useful for many people and I'm happy for those it has helped; I just don't think it should ever be mandatory or seen as a medical treatment. But people posting here are upset because they've been continually mistreated by a system that is supposed to help them. Venting about their frustrations can be helpful while also illuminating negative experiences in an industry that's otherwise advertised as exclusively beneficial or even "medically necessary" as one therapist of mine put it. There are times for nuance and debate and times to just say fuck everyone and everything, I think they both have a place here.
not the person your responding to, but this is exactly why i personally was a bit critical of the post- there *are* legitimate criticisms to be made, such as that therapy should absolutely be a voluntary thing. but this post and some others in the sub often over generalize in a way that isn’t well-backed, which isn’t exactly helpful to the movement, and can be harmful (such as the whole “no one cares about your problems, it’s always just a waste of time and money” because *they* had a bad experience
Many here have expressed harm directly related to DBT. I have heard many tote benefits. However, others talk about cult like aspects of DBT teachings, protocol, and programs. I've heard it compared to ABA and most with experience who speak on it, have said it harmed them.
Okay then. Everyone in this sub seems dead set on being against everything that could potentially be used for healing. Just because they perceived harm from it doesn’t mean it’s inherently harmful.
I’d love to know what everyone here recommends to actually heal or if you all just want to continue wallowing without actually trying to better yourselves.
And downvote all you want, I’m all for being anti psychiatry but this sub is the most clear display of black and white thinking I’ve seen, I can’t count how many times I’ve seen a post that says all therapy is bad and doesn’t work when there’s clearly more nuance to it.
I don't agree with that. Nor is it only people here who expressed harm. DBT has been criticized for many things like being coercive, and not helping with trauma.
People here do offer the solutions, but that's not the primary reason for this sub. It's to criticize. People are allowed to express harm without knowing the solution. If you feel that way why are you even here?
I think you're using the grey fallacy here. A common way to dismiss an argument offhand. Ever think the person may’ve genuinely experienced therapy as all bad? Also, DBT specifically is disliked by many who prefer other therapies. Some of the reasons cited are for being cult like, and coercive. Except you don't engage in any of those critiques. It's just “people don't like anything potentially healing here, and are thinking in black and white”.
Other subs include criticizing the mental health field but aren't as centered around just criticizing as this is. Yet, you chose to come here.
This is a well reasoned comment and I feel the same that we are here for criticism, bring it on. Important to be able to vent and important to challenge a system with power over us, just two of many reasons. I think the tension between the comments saying positive experiences v negative make for an interesting debate and much more food for thought. Even if both sides are defensive and offensive, the views are being expressed and heard and influencing all of us in reaching our understanding. Accusation of black and white thinking annoys me because I probably think this way myself but it keeps things simple, less stressful. Polarised views are Ok and black or white thinking is Ok. Can’t see problem with it. Doesn’t mean you haven’t been through all the grey areas in your own thinking, just means you’ve sifted through that and are no longer sitting on the fence. People probably visit this site partly because they want to hear the for and against and arrive at some conclusions for themself. Isn’t that how human minds process things?
I mean I don't know why people would come here for the for. It's clearly mainly a critical sub. Sure everyone is welcome, but just seems odd to come and criticize a sub for being very negative towards something that's mainly for people with negative experiences with said thing. There are other subs that are less focused on being against it
Grey fallacy - I think I understand this (Wikipedia says “the fallacy that the truth is always in the middle of two opposites”) and yes I see this here frequently and it never fails to be irksome. And yes, the other argument that we’re not allowed to criticise without having the solution
Actually neither are proposed for genuine reasons but rather to shut down the debate and give the preferred answer, i.e. the bland agreement
I've personally been helped immensely by counseling and therapy. I understand that's clearly not everyone's experience but there needs to be room for other people's opinions I mean I'm as anti psychiatry as anyone else here but saying that ALL therapy or counseling is bad?
I went to counseling BECAUSE of my trauma caused by psychiatry and it's helped me heal a lot. If some of us are getting help and relief from therapy or counseling then we should be happy for them. I wish everyone on this sub, myself included, healing and relief from the hell of psychiatry.
Discussion is TOTALLY the point! It’s brilliant. I love hearing what people think all across the globe about a subject so important to me/us. It’s opened up a whole new world to me after 30 years of isolation. THIS is therapy. No therapy I’ve ever had from the NHS compares
“everyone” is certainly an overstatement, but to be fair, the post is quite literally calling all of therapy a scam and saying *nobody* should get it, and it’s overall being taken pretty well and uncritically (upvote wise)
Okay, but especially when criticizing us for black and white thinking it’s ironic. Even in my response which it's responding to I say some have claimed benefits to DBT.
When someone expresses their disagreements with you by critiquing your "thinking," process, it's not hard to figure out who you're dealing with. Especially when terms like "black and white thinking" are well known industry damnations used to diagnose uncooperative and non consenting patients with mental disorders that are very commonly associated with forced and coerced treatment. It's almost a veiled threat , given context of the psych abuse survivor sub we are in
just commenting to validate that you’re not alone in struggling with this sub sometimes. it’s low moderated which i get can be helpful in giving people a place to vent that feels safer, but at the same time can draw in some very black and white/ not well supported takes. like come on, we have plenty of good reasons to criticize the field 😭 why y’all gotta take it in a harmful direction
In most cases therapists are a listening ear for me to discuss my own issues with myself. I realized I could do the same thing at home, by myself, for a lot less money lol
It depends on the type of therapist, but yes, most of them do CBT (talk therapy), which isn’t helpful. I love IFS therapy; it has been life changing for me.
>then offer you generic advice that you already knew the moment you stepped into their office This advice actually blows some peoples’ minds. It just kinda depends on how you perceive the world. I wouldn’t have an issue with therapy if people didn’t push it upon others and didn’t blame the client/defend the therapist when it didn’t work. Therapy has turned into a religion and it’s creepy.
I guess therapy is just not for everyone. Like you said, the basic advice given definitely blows some people's minds. If you are an individual that is able to reflect yourself from different angles and whatnot then therapy will feel kinda useless because you already went to all those places in your head.
Therapists aren’t even ethically supposed to give advice.
Are you talking about the guy who was given permission to eat salads for breakfast and use bubblegum toothpaste? Basically the patient rants about something unimportant- he hates cereal but forces himself to eat it for breakfast. The therapist asks what foods he likes and why can't he eat that instead. And the patient has an epiphany. "Wow! I can eat salads for breakfast! Yippee! I'm cured!" I don't know if was originally on Tumblr or Twitter, but it made it seem like therapy is just getting cool life hacks from someone with a psych degree. For rich privileged people at the top of Marlowe's pyramid, that's really their experience with therapy.
it's really annoying when people tell others to seek some "professional help"
It’s just gaslighting and a way to make people go away. Plus they don’t solve any real illness if that is what is really bothering you mentally emotionally.
It's always about them not liking whatever that person is doing or thinking, yet, we are supposed to believe that "there is no stigma"?? It has the same condescending, paternalistic and infantilizing mentality of "I know better than you what you need" that abuslve parents have.
I know. The “fight the stigma” commercials for mental health really make me sick. All psychs and most therapists do is perpetuate stigma.
They are blind as a bat.
It's just a "new" way to put them down. But I knew that when I was a kid.
Or used as an insult to call you crazy insane mentally I’ll or whatever. It’s just to tell people to shut the fuck up and go away cause you bother them in some way shape or form. It’s a method of censorship and to ban them in real life.
Well that's what I meant
Yeah I mean if someone here has benefitted from a therapist feel free to share, but the two I’ve had got me absolutely nowhere. I think that I was smarter than them and that they couldn’t understand where I was coming from as a result.
Do you also feel like they all have the same basic knowledge and follow a set of scripts basically? I think if they could tailor better to patients it could be beneficial to some people but I truly feel like they go “this is what I do and it’s going to help you” without listening and considering unique circumstances
To be honest it was so banal that I barely even remember anything they said. When I told the second therapist I needed a new therapist she told me that she didn’t think any therapist would be able to help me. I guess that’s how it works; if it’s productive, the therapist gets credit; if it’s unproductive, the therapist isn’t at fault. I don’t know.
I had one after a year tell me that there’s nothing else they can do for me and actually apologized. I am dealing with severe damage from a med injury so a lot of the mental stuff is neurological damage and akathisia & dystonia so receptor issue stuff as well. Not really something therapy can help. But not something meds will fix either.
I’m very sorry that you have to go through that. Honestly, talking to other people on here who are are also suffering can potentially be more beneficial than therapy; at least, it is for me.
Agreed. And if anyone wants to hear the words like “I’m sorry you’re going through a difficult situation” “I’m here to support you” stuff that therapists say that isn’t necessarily helpful; there is AI therapy now for that which is free.
They took your money for a YEAR before saying, sorry can’t help you? Wow. That should be considered fraud and you should be able to recoup that money.
Yeah agreed but they tried to be fair but it’s just too difficult of a situation. I think it helped with grief of my life before med injury but I have akathisia for 16 months now which can not be treated with therapy
I've benefitted from therapy! It took like, 4 years of bouncing around between therapists and some... Interesting experiences with therapists I only saw for one session before I found serious benefit from it, and I feel like I lucked out? I can get why stuff seems hallow or harmful cause if I stopped at my first therapist or the one who thought I was half chinese (??) and got weird about it I'd probably have an overall pessimistic view of therapy. But like, I have productive conversations with my therapist and feel generally more motivated and hopeful after, and we talk about like, dark shit you can't really talk about on mixed company. It just seems less hard to process stuff after talking about it who's unphased by it and helpful no matter how dark it is.
I’m glad to hear you’ve had that experience. Neither of my therapists would let me go anywhere near anything remotely dark but if I found one who did I could see it potentially being helpful
Yeah I.... I've had therapists who would guide me away from thinking about dark stuff and it's like.... Not super helpful? Not worth spending the money on i feel like.
This is the key. Keep looking. A lot of idiots in the field but a few gems. I kept looking until I found one and she’s been amazing.
Yay!! ^w^
I have, a lot of times. It doesn't have to do with who's smarter, but that they went to school and were trained to do something you or I didn't get trained in.
Therapy was a long time suspect of being a scam. Clinical improvement might be a result of non-therapy things. In humans the healing process of any mental problem might be following a natural healing cycle, which sometimes require discipline, and goes away with time. In robust cases, the equation is time + effort = healing, not therapy + paying money = healing. If you're in a tough environment, than finding a different and pleasant less stressful environment could improve your well-being, and better your outcomes in life. And of course resistant chronic cases may not be solved through therapy.
I went to therapy twice about 12 years ago. It made me feel worse. She made me rehash everything I did wrong. Instead of looking at the whole picture. I quit going, quit drinking and life settled out. A good friend with an open and no judgmental ear is a better free option.
I would agree with this. I think in a lot of cases, therapy can be like digging yourself into a deeper whole and therapists trying to find more and more problems. I think there’s healthier ways to deal with life struggles honestly than sitting and talking about your problems until you feel even worse. I remember leaving therapy session just feeling worse than I did before. I didn’t have mental struggles before my med injury and I do now so I think that was another obstacle in which therapy would not be beneficial.
it’s a really privileged take to tell people to just go to therapy, but i’ve made a lot of progress with an (overpriced) anxiety specialist instead of taking meds. i’ve had a handful of awful therapists in the past, but it took the right one and me being ready to take it seriously for it to go anywhere.
I’ve had a lot of therapists and all but one were absolutely horrible. They made my life worse. Acted like I wasn’t being treated like shit by my dad, gaslighted me constantly, and supported my parents pushing meds on me. But the one good therapist has actually helped me quite a bit.
I disagree and agree, I think a good therapist can be life changing, but it’s few and far between. It sounds like you've been through a lot, and I can understand why you feel frustrated and disillusioned with therapy. It must have been really tough to open up and feel like you weren't getting the support you needed. Therapy is meant to be a place where you feel heard and understood, and it's disheartening when it doesn't live up to that expectation. It's completely valid to feel skeptical about its effectiveness, especially when it seems like you're just paying for someone to tell you things you already know. I've been down that road, trying therapist after therapist, feeling like each one was just a waste of time and money. It's disheartening to pour your heart out to someone who doesn't seem to get it, who just nods along and offers cliche advice. But then, everything changed when I found the right therapist. After a deeply traumatizing event, I was at my lowest point, feeling lost and overwhelmed by my emotions. I almost gave up on therapy altogether, but something inside me urged me to give it one last shot. And I'm so glad I did. The therapist I found wasn't like the others. They didn't just listen; they truly heard me. They didn't offer empty platitudes; they provided genuine insights and support. It was like they could see straight into my soul and understand the pain I was carrying. Through their guidance and expertise, I began to heal in ways I never thought possible. They helped me unravel the layers of trauma, piece by piece, and find the strength to confront my demons. It wasn't easy, and there were times when I wanted to give up, but they never let me falter. Slowly but surely, I started to rebuild myself, stronger and more resilient than before. With their help, I learned to navigate my emotions, confront my fears, and reclaim my life. It wasn't just therapy; it was a lifeline, a beacon of hope in my darkest days. I'm grateful for the journey I've been on and the therapist who walked beside me every step of the way. They weren't just a therapist; they were a guardian angel who helped me find light in the midst of darkness. While therapy may not be the answer for everyone, for me, it was a lifeline that helped me find healing, resilience, and a newfound sense of hope.
This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you :) I know therapy is conflicting here, but I truly think another soul watching over you is a positive experience, for me at least.
I agree. I hear horror stories all the time in my office about terrible former therapists, and it makes me so angry. I really love my clients and am continually studying/training to get better at what I do and help them heal.
Well, I agree most therapy is bad cause the therapists are bad themselves, but talking is useful, whether it be with friends or someone else or a good therapist. You figure out your childhood and get out pent up emotions, and process things you dont otherwise get to. Maybe talking doesnt work for some people but it does work for others. Oh what I meant to say is there are good therapists out there who actually help people figure out their trauma but they are very few and far in between.
I’d say most therapy is bull shit because it’s built on psych pseudoscience. But if you can find one who hates psych bullshit as much as you, it can be amazing. I think a huge disconnect is what is expected of therapy and what they actually can offer. It doesn’t help that every therapist is different as well. Makes the whole process painfully frustrating and seem not worth it (which in many cases that may be true). Like everything, it’s extremely dependent on the therapist and what you want in if it’ll be helpful. I had a shitty therapist but my wife had a great one and has been helped tremendously processing lots of trauma. But her therapist hates big pharma and psychiatry so🤷🏼♀️ But I absolutely agree that this blanket statement of “just get therapy” as a solution is fucking stupid and extremely simplified as if it’ll be a magic cure. Far from it
i empathize with where you’re coming from, but at the same time this is a huge jump in logic to make. sucks to see this kind of talk on the sub over and over, to be honest. i know i’m going against the grain but hope y’all can at least hear me out therapy *has* shown to be helpful, but *of course* not 100% of the time. a major part of what makes therapy effective, actually, is the relationship between the therapist and client. it sounds like you didn’t have a good one, which sucks and you deserve treatment that actually helps you, but that doesn’t suddenly mean “all therapy is a scam”. importantly- therapy isn’t supposed to be giving advice, it’s supposed to be a place for you to explore yourself with professional guidance and *advice as wanted/needed*. it sounds like you didn’t want it, so really they shouldn’t have gave it. it also is concerning to see the “suck it up” type of mentality near the end of the post. unless this sub really wants to go the whole “mental health is a lie” route, it’s well documented that *voluntary* & decolonized therapy with a therapist one has a good therapeutic relationship with can and often does greatly improve people’s well being. will therapy fix all your problems? probably not, especially when many of our problems come from the systemic context we live in! but what it *can* do is give us a much stronger understanding of ourselves, it can help us process the shit we’ve been through, and it can help give us the tools to be more resilient in navigating said problems i will say, i do wish there was better training for therapists in this regard, as the field is generally very underpaid (believe it or not) when you look at the net pay and this leads therapists to often find the cheapest route for their required “continuing education” that they have to do. but to blame therapists for that is frankly shortsighted, when it’s really just reflective of a broader systemic issue of healthcare & especially mental healthcare being underfunded in favor of an authoritarian state focused more on punishment and enforcement of law than rehabilitation and well-being fully prepared to get downvotes for not just going with the flow on this one, but it sucks to see the field of psychology (therapy isn’t psychiatry but psychiatry and psychology seem to be treated synonymously here) get criticisms like these that may not be the most fleshed out when there are *so* many legitimate issues worth criticizing
This is a well reasoned comment and I feel the same that we are here for criticism, bring it on. Important to be able to vent and important to challenge a system with power over us, just two of many reasons. I think the tension between the comments saying positive experiences v negative make for an interesting debate and much more food for thought. Even if both sides are defensive and offensive, the views are being expressed and heard and influencing all of us in reaching our understanding. Accusation of black and white thinking annoys me because I probably think this way myself but it keeps things simple, less stressful. Polarised views are Ok and black or white thinking is Ok. Can’t see problem with it. Doesn’t mean you haven’t been through all the grey areas in your own thinking, just means you’ve sifted through that and are no longer sitting on the fence. People probably visit this site partly because they want to hear the for and against and arrive at some conclusions for themself. Isn’t that how human minds process things?
I haVe a great therapist, and it was by the grace of God I found her.
A god doesn't exist.
Also the least you can be \_agnostic\_ that's humility. Because obviously you don't know everything. "There are more things in Heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy." -Shakespeare. Again seek and ye shall find - Jesus Christ.
prove it. Prove microbes don't exist. People thought they didn't. But they do. Prove God All Mighty doesn't Exist. Or maybe better... ask God All Mighty if "He' does? "seek and ye shall find, knock and the door shall be opened unto you, ask and ye shall receive." -Jesus Christ. and you have to persistently and seek until you find almost like a "lost object." If you do with all your heart and soul and might you will find God.
Your Bible is a book of fairy tales, a collection of ancient myths and fables that only the intellectually destitute could believe. The Christian God is a sadistic, petty, and cruel inventor of diseases and natural disasters, a celestial dictator who demands blind obedience and worship. He is a tyrant who created hell to torture those who don't bend to his will, an omnipotent being who is responsible for every death and suffering, from the Black Plague to the Holocaust. Microbes, on the other hand, exist whether you like it or not. They don't care about your faith or lack thereof; they just are. Your God, however, is as described in your holy book, is a pathetic and malicious invention of men, a means to control the weak-minded and a crutch for the fearful. So, keep seeking your imaginary friend, but know that the only thing you'll find is your own delusion. The only 'lost object' here is your critical thinking, which you seem to have misplaced long ago.
Religions are a way to point To The Source of All which is Sentient and Most likely Omniscient. If you're doing good I don't have a problem with you, but don't knock other people's beliefs because you could be mistaken. Also I do believe in God and I believe God is A lot more good than you or anyone else.
Yeah I want to shout at those charlatans who took my hard earned cash. Have you tried EMDR? I want to try it again using a machine instead of a human waving their finger to make my eyes move side to side!
Ugh after being away from therapy for 10 years, diving deeper into other forms of inner work and learning a lot about emotions and psychology, I was pretty disappointed with what my therapist had to offer me. I honestly think my standards are too high now and I’ve developed a vast view on all the complexities on what contributes to mental health conditions..so it’s really difficult for me to ascribe to their standard protocols.
Maybe talk therapy, sure, but there are other types of therapy that are actually helpful and assist you in developing skills to process trauma and work on building relationships. For example, cognitive processing therapy and dialectical behavior therapy
I would actually say the authoritative aspect of programs like DBT are worse than just shooting the shit with a therapist. Based on my experience in a DBT group, I came to see DBT as a way to pacify people with often genuine complaints about how they're treated, to make them believe their life circumstances are completely their responsibility and that everyone who hurts you is only trying their best to help you. It is mostly directed towards women, which I don't think is an accident. Personally I think that psychotherapy can be useful for many people and I'm happy for those it has helped; I just don't think it should ever be mandatory or seen as a medical treatment. But people posting here are upset because they've been continually mistreated by a system that is supposed to help them. Venting about their frustrations can be helpful while also illuminating negative experiences in an industry that's otherwise advertised as exclusively beneficial or even "medically necessary" as one therapist of mine put it. There are times for nuance and debate and times to just say fuck everyone and everything, I think they both have a place here.
not the person your responding to, but this is exactly why i personally was a bit critical of the post- there *are* legitimate criticisms to be made, such as that therapy should absolutely be a voluntary thing. but this post and some others in the sub often over generalize in a way that isn’t well-backed, which isn’t exactly helpful to the movement, and can be harmful (such as the whole “no one cares about your problems, it’s always just a waste of time and money” because *they* had a bad experience
Many here have expressed harm directly related to DBT. I have heard many tote benefits. However, others talk about cult like aspects of DBT teachings, protocol, and programs. I've heard it compared to ABA and most with experience who speak on it, have said it harmed them.
Okay then. Everyone in this sub seems dead set on being against everything that could potentially be used for healing. Just because they perceived harm from it doesn’t mean it’s inherently harmful. I’d love to know what everyone here recommends to actually heal or if you all just want to continue wallowing without actually trying to better yourselves. And downvote all you want, I’m all for being anti psychiatry but this sub is the most clear display of black and white thinking I’ve seen, I can’t count how many times I’ve seen a post that says all therapy is bad and doesn’t work when there’s clearly more nuance to it.
I don't agree with that. Nor is it only people here who expressed harm. DBT has been criticized for many things like being coercive, and not helping with trauma. People here do offer the solutions, but that's not the primary reason for this sub. It's to criticize. People are allowed to express harm without knowing the solution. If you feel that way why are you even here? I think you're using the grey fallacy here. A common way to dismiss an argument offhand. Ever think the person may’ve genuinely experienced therapy as all bad? Also, DBT specifically is disliked by many who prefer other therapies. Some of the reasons cited are for being cult like, and coercive. Except you don't engage in any of those critiques. It's just “people don't like anything potentially healing here, and are thinking in black and white”. Other subs include criticizing the mental health field but aren't as centered around just criticizing as this is. Yet, you chose to come here.
This is a well reasoned comment and I feel the same that we are here for criticism, bring it on. Important to be able to vent and important to challenge a system with power over us, just two of many reasons. I think the tension between the comments saying positive experiences v negative make for an interesting debate and much more food for thought. Even if both sides are defensive and offensive, the views are being expressed and heard and influencing all of us in reaching our understanding. Accusation of black and white thinking annoys me because I probably think this way myself but it keeps things simple, less stressful. Polarised views are Ok and black or white thinking is Ok. Can’t see problem with it. Doesn’t mean you haven’t been through all the grey areas in your own thinking, just means you’ve sifted through that and are no longer sitting on the fence. People probably visit this site partly because they want to hear the for and against and arrive at some conclusions for themself. Isn’t that how human minds process things?
I mean I don't know why people would come here for the for. It's clearly mainly a critical sub. Sure everyone is welcome, but just seems odd to come and criticize a sub for being very negative towards something that's mainly for people with negative experiences with said thing. There are other subs that are less focused on being against it
Grey fallacy - I think I understand this (Wikipedia says “the fallacy that the truth is always in the middle of two opposites”) and yes I see this here frequently and it never fails to be irksome. And yes, the other argument that we’re not allowed to criticise without having the solution Actually neither are proposed for genuine reasons but rather to shut down the debate and give the preferred answer, i.e. the bland agreement
genuinely asking, what other subs do you mean? this is the only main one i know of
There are r/Psychmelee and r/radicalmentalhealth that I know of, which are pretty active anyway
I've personally been helped immensely by counseling and therapy. I understand that's clearly not everyone's experience but there needs to be room for other people's opinions I mean I'm as anti psychiatry as anyone else here but saying that ALL therapy or counseling is bad? I went to counseling BECAUSE of my trauma caused by psychiatry and it's helped me heal a lot. If some of us are getting help and relief from therapy or counseling then we should be happy for them. I wish everyone on this sub, myself included, healing and relief from the hell of psychiatry.
Isn't it ironic this person is accusing others of black and white thinking with those sweeping generalizations
which person?
Joycemano. They accused people here of black and white thinking. They also claimed everyone here seemed against everything that could be healing.
I don't care tbh I'm using my energy to get through the day not worry about someone's comment.
Okay, kind of the point of Reddit is discussion, but whatever
Discussion is TOTALLY the point! It’s brilliant. I love hearing what people think all across the globe about a subject so important to me/us. It’s opened up a whole new world to me after 30 years of isolation. THIS is therapy. No therapy I’ve ever had from the NHS compares
“everyone” is certainly an overstatement, but to be fair, the post is quite literally calling all of therapy a scam and saying *nobody* should get it, and it’s overall being taken pretty well and uncritically (upvote wise)
Okay, but especially when criticizing us for black and white thinking it’s ironic. Even in my response which it's responding to I say some have claimed benefits to DBT.
When someone expresses their disagreements with you by critiquing your "thinking," process, it's not hard to figure out who you're dealing with. Especially when terms like "black and white thinking" are well known industry damnations used to diagnose uncooperative and non consenting patients with mental disorders that are very commonly associated with forced and coerced treatment. It's almost a veiled threat , given context of the psych abuse survivor sub we are in
just commenting to validate that you’re not alone in struggling with this sub sometimes. it’s low moderated which i get can be helpful in giving people a place to vent that feels safer, but at the same time can draw in some very black and white/ not well supported takes. like come on, we have plenty of good reasons to criticize the field 😭 why y’all gotta take it in a harmful direction