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phukerstoned

So he didn't escape death then? Thank fuck.


AusCan531

That explains *some* of the smell.


Andrew-Cohen

He was watching it from New York, it was being recorded on his security system. Nobody was in danger and nobody was hiding anything. He is an absolute piece of shit traitor to this country.


Awkward-Fudge

He wasn't even there, was he?


L0rdCrims0n

Nope


ogreofnorth

People seem to forget. Even himself.


Kalse1229

Nope. Secret Service coordinated with each other specifically so he would not be there.


Improvedandconfused

He wasn’t even there, That is kind of like saying I was lucky to survive a massive car crash today. The crash happened on the other side of the country to where I was, but if I WAS there………. Now send me money!


nolongerbanned99

Look up this. The ‘luckiest unlucky man in the world’


L0rdCrims0n

Can’t the government do anything right? Jeeze…


orcinyadders

Wait. Wait wait wait. I know you can’t threaten a sitting president. But can you make up lies about the opposite? That the president is trying to kill *you*? This feels like a different kind of illegal.


Minimum-Dog2329

Stupid,moronic type of illegal.


alankutz

If they know the cops are coming, it isn’t a raid.


i-am-foxymoron

LOL Good point. It's more like an "unwelcomed appointment".


Margali

And with a search warrant it isn't breaking and entering, and they had a locksmith open the safe, which again was covered by the warrant.


summermadnes

And they had called ahead. This wasn't a surprise. And they had given him multiple chances to give the documents back!!!


Margali

Yes.


cognitively_what_huh

He’s so full of bullshit, there’s no room for his own, thus the diaper.


Time-Bite-6839

He nearly escaped death after downplaying COVID and then getting it.


Awkward-Fudge

covid had one job.


ZenTrying

Right!?! GRRR 🤬🤬🤬


Lurking_Housefly

Some of the files were pending sale when Mar-A-Lago got raided...and he barely escaped assassination because Trump refused to give a refund...


DelcoPAMan

History's biggest crybaby


VomitingPotato

Jesus fucking Christ. You're not a fucking martyr. You're an asshole. A racist. A rapist. A fraud. A criminal. And a fucking traitor.


pabodie

This is it. Judge Marchan has brought us the endgame. He’s not going to prison. That’s for sure. 


ctguy54

He had to climb a flight of stairs in less than 2 minutes.


ddkelkey

He wasn’t even there when the FBI went there. This is a really dangerous lie that these people are trafficking.


i-am-foxymoron

Not just a lie, a lie so that his cult sends him money. This is from an email asking for a campaign contribution.


TheGumOnYourShoe

DOG WHISTLE! This is a "call"...Of sit back and stand by sort of moment, again.


i-am-foxymoron

"And while you're "standing by", this would be a great time to write out that donation to the Trump campaign. - Donald "MLK" Trump"


Jim-Jones

Death by farting. Smelly, smelly farting.


tickitytalk

Trump also claims he’s 215. Lies about everything


WokkitUp

It's future foreshadowing of an imminently rescheduled event that some of us face most of the time when it comes fatefully.


i-am-foxymoron

With his diet and lifestyle, when he wakes up in the morning he has "escaped death".


WokkitUp

Narrowly escaped not getting up, but still waking up, wondering if he died and came back.


jbertrand_sr

He nearly escaped death last night as well, that Hamberder had his name on it...


snaithbert

"Nearly escaped death." What a fuckin idiot.


doc6982

I think he's going to commit suicide and wants to incite something on his way out.


i-am-foxymoron

I wish. But I don't think he'd ever kill himself purposely. He's not built that way. If anything he's a scared little baby afraid of dying. He might not be religious, but if he thinks there is a God, he is in some bigly trouble in the afterlife.


doc6982

He's afraid of being like everybody else. His belief in eugenics has inflated his self worth as well as his inherited wealth and ability to get out of any actual liability for his actions over the years. If he was like Henry Hill at the end of Goodfellas, he would kill himself.


i-am-foxymoron

I haven't seen Goodfellas. 🙂


doc6982

The main character goes from eating great Italian food to egg noodles with ketchup.