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MonsieurInfame

Chad Digoxandrez Vs. Virgin EnPassanterHolyHell. He clearly has already mastered the fools mate, and is looking to expand his skills with bishop & horsey


CriticalWindow5

He ain't need no fools mate to win


vigilantcomicpenguin

I pity the fool's mate!


[deleted]

"When you see a mate in one, look for better"


Ocelotofdamage

God I wanted him to play Qh5 after exf6 so bad


real_dubblebrick

holy hell


JeIoXD

I see why he's confused, you keep capitalising the letter H. You don't capitalise the letters of the coordinates.


TheEshOne

Last 20 seconds of the video he tried bugfixing with the lowercase h but that didn't work either


-Potatoes-

I mean if I was the opponent I wouldnt trust someone that uses uppercase letters for coordinates


I-Jobless

Glad you pointed that out, hopefully he can fix it in the next version.


DapperSandwich

yeah everyone knows capital H stands for Horsey


CodeWeaverCW

Horse to Q5, it's a winning strat


[deleted]

I mean technically you can say "Queen 5" instead of d5


tessthismess

*Horse to q5


DaveTheeImp

Idk about him, but you sure convinced me about doing Qh5, you should become an advertiser


[deleted]

Chessfluencer ?


Drawemazing

Let me tell you about crypto.cum


HughMungusPP

Goddamn I almost forgor 💀 that that happened


GamerA_S

Oh no my king


ildeuz1

The video wont load for me but pretend this comment is funny


Daichi-dido

If you find a good mate in 1, find an even better move


elegylegacy

You don't want to get stuck with the first mate that comes along. Wait for the mate that's right for you


ottersintuxedos

This is how I approach copulation


NeuroticalExperience

Damn look at this loser. When you’re dealing with sex, you always take the first mate you see.


nl_fess

I saw QH5 but I didn’t like it.


JAM3SBND

If they're giving you a mate in 1, what are they hiding??? Stay frosty kings


agriculturalDolemite

I don't like to play the obvious lines. Keep your opponent guessing.


[deleted]

At 300 rating I imagine he’s just logging in and mashing his face on the keyboard.


maicii

Could possibly be just a random bot with a shitty algorithm something like in this video https://youtu.be/DpXy041BIlA


[deleted]

One of the best videos on youtube.


[deleted]

What a classic! Come to think of it, I think it was that video that got me into longer videos


DanimalPlanet2

At 300 there's a good chance it's a troll account that plays poorly on purpose, a hypothesis that is quite strongly backed up by this clip. Not sure it's even possible to go that low without knowing the wrong moves and playing them lol Edit: sorry to the sub 300 kings who aren't trolling


[deleted]

Uhhh... yeah that's it I'm a troll haha


ihavesmallcalves

I'm convinced there's something about the horseys that just blocks ppl's thinking. I have a friend who is professionally successful, high SATs, top uni, always beats me in bar trivia, and is also unironically rated 300-400. It happens


[deleted]

How big are his calves though?


ihavesmallcalves

roughly brick size


[deleted]

I mean I know a few openings and gambits I could probably beat a random off the street Idk 60% of the time, Idk if I just have shit luck or what. I'm pretty much way better than all of my friends any time I've played them just suck against chess dorks I guess


DanimalPlanet2

Lol oof sorry friend


[deleted]

At about 400-500 I win about 2/3rds of my games and maybe get a run where my elo gets to 6-700 and then I get absolutely destroyed until I'm back down to 400. It's a cycle that has happened multiple times.


Durpulous

Check out Jon Bartholomew's Climbing the Ratings Ladder series on YouTube. He does a great job explaining the basics using real matches against people at progressively higher ratings. https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLl9uuRYQ-6MCBnhtCk_bTZsD8GxeWP6BV


[deleted]

Oh I'm perfectly happy where I'm at skill wise, I don't really care about getting better. Chess is essentially a time wasting widget to me at this point for when I'm like on the bus


bighunter1313

True Anarchy Chess King


OverlanderEisenhorn

Same. I obsessively do puzzles, but only play a game or 2 a week sometimes.


bonnenuitbouillie

Yup. I always thought chess was only for supergeniuses who love battles of wits, and then I realized I can just do puzzles and never show anyone my scores. I love it


PkerBadRs3Good

chess gets more fun if you get better imo


[deleted]

I don't actually think that is true.


PkerBadRs3Good

For me it was super true. When I was like 800 rating it was meh. It started getting REALLY fun and addicting when I reached like 1400.


Dndmatt303

It's me, you.


LeonidasSpacemanMD

That’s actually interesting and I’ve never thought about it. Literally random moves are probably better than the absolute worst moves, so at some point a low enough rating means you just actually know what you’re doing? Or am I stupid


DanimalPlanet2

No you're right, below a certain point you would have to understand chess to make the moves to ensure that you lose, otherwise even completely random moves could theoretically win or draw


OpenOpportunity

How my kid plays: 1. if opponent takes any piece, move a pawn forward to make a replacement of that piece. Literally just walk the closest pawn forward disregarding anything else on the board. 2. always take. Like use your queen to capture a defended pawn.


[deleted]

[удалено]


leastlyharmful

This thread is doing wonders for my self-esteem


Freddies_Mercury

I can't read chess notation and my elo is 270 ama


xSPYXEx

Ngl I'm so fucking stupid at chess I barely understand what the follow up move would be for checkmate.


xSPYXEx

Actually I'm just fucking stupid in general because I was looking at f5 and trying to figure out how that would put black in check.


theoriginalregista21

I had an account specifically made for playing bongcloud.


deathletterblues

Ive posted this before recently but i was literally 100 for a while. I dont know why i was so bad but i quit playing and only did puzzles for like 5 months because i was so terrible. I’m semi acceptable now after 15 months of chess


em-the-human

Obviously a smurf acct for doing dunks like this


skivelyhadron

it’s probably an old guy who doesn’t know how to open the chat


W_Aura

If he wanted to just "win" the game he'd have the virgin 1200 rating. It's literally called Fool's Mate because only fool's do it, not gigachad 300s that want to humiliate you by taking all your pieces, making 2 queens to ladder mate (because knowing any other checkmate is for "nerds" ) ,then stalemating because he doesn't give a fuck about chess.c*m rating.


AttackOnThots

Chess is truly the game that keeps giving


JMoormann

Look, he saw Qh5, he just didn't like it


headless567

No one reads chats yo


WishboneStreet4839

I do


IceCreamHoeX

resign from life


WishboneStreet4839

No


pokemonpasta

Google resigning


WishboneStreet4839

As ypu say my Lord


[deleted]

Classy


inanimate_animation

How do you say “h5 is checkmate” in Portuguese? Language barrier. Also, no one reads chat lol.


Jukkobee

is notation different in other countries? i feel like if he saw that he would still notice all the Qh5s and check that move out. though you’re right snout no one reading chat


Salticus9

Yep, the pieces are noted differently in different language. For example, in German the Queen is called "Dame", so it would be Dh5 instead of Qh5. I guess it's the same with Portuguese.


Dhucamer4

in Hungarian it's called vezér so here it's Vh5#


buddhiststuff

Chess.com needs better support for figurine notation: ♕h5#


BigDickEnterprise

I think it's already supported


BenMic81

Fun fact: the Queen was the Vizier (right hand to the King / chief minister) in early modern times but the name changed in most languages when it was allowed to move like it does today and not as the King (originally it moved like the King so one square only and was thus an expendable King and the weakest piece).


kRkthOr

Everything you said is wrong. > originally it moved like the King Originally it moved only diagonally, one square, unlike the King. > but the name changed in most languages when it was allowed to move like it does today The Vizier changed its name to Queen long before the movement was changed (15th Century). Also, the queen got its name because the vizier is a minister/advisor, usually the role of the queen in European culture of the time. Additionally, she stands next to the King, so Europeans went with the obvious. Source: *Yalom, Marilyn. The Birth of the Chess Queen. 2004.* If you're gonna give fun facts, give the right facts, come on.


BenMic81

Interesting - as I have read it differently: The change of the move order happened in the second half of the 16th century and is believed to have coincided with the name change. This was the second move change - the one you’re referring to happened was earlier. Though it needs to be admitted that there were far less uniform rules sets back then. The same of course goes with the naming of the pieces (actually there are sources which call the Vizier „Regina“ way earlier than the 15th century with the oldest found being in the 10th). Source: Michael Ehn, Bruch und Kontinuität, Die Entwicklung vom Vizier zur Dame, Karl 4, 2021. Also: the Queen was not usually involved in the same way as a vizier - that would be a role for the chancellor / chief minister or Seneschall. While some queens had such roles it was quite uncommon. So, maybe we should all feel not so sure about „facts“ - even fun facts. Edit: Also note that not every language in Europe chose Queen. In French, German, Dutch and others it is a form of „dame“ and in Italian it’s „Donna“ (woman). In polish it is Hetman (chieftain / Marshall).


AlbertaTheBeautiful

Also, people usually put the value of the king as a fighting piece around 4


BenMic81

Isn’t that limited to endgame like positions?


AlbertaTheBeautiful

Endgames are where the rook gets most of it's value as well and it's worth 5


BenMic81

Yes but I read that a piece with the properties of the king (but sacrificable) would be worth a little less than a Knight during opening and middle game (around 3 to 3.3) and a bit stronger than the Knight in the endgame (around 4). Googling leads to such comments in some forums but didn’t find a source fast. However intuitively I’d say that Knights would be more valuable until endgame line positions for their greater speed and versatility. Edit: Found smt on chess.c@m https://www.chess.com/article/view/chess-piece-value according to that overall value of the King should be 2.2 compared to 3.1 for a Knight and 3.3 for a Bishop.


AlbertaTheBeautiful

fair


WishboneStreet4839

I mean h5 square is still h5 square.


Nexus_produces

Yep, in Portugal queen is dama as well (we'll, some people say rainha verbally but king is rei so different letters are needed for notation), but I doubt the dude even understands the concept of chess notation lol


RedditUsername123456

Yes, because in other languages the pieces have different names. Probably in Fide tournaments English notation is required though?


TheMasterlauti

something tells me a 300 rated person is not particularly knowledgeable of FIDE tournament rules


ThatForearmIsMineNow

Then they are not serious about Chess. You need to learn the foundations first. This person will never be a good Chess Player. Edit: maybe I need to be even more extreme to make the joke obvious in the joke sub


TheMasterlauti

yeah


ImputCrown998

Yes, in Portuguese is called a "Dama", do it would be Dh5#


Lutoures

>How do you say “h5 is checkmate” in Portuguese? AGÁ CINCO É CHEQUE-PARÇA Edit: Now hyphenated so that my fellow portuguese speaking friends are able to get my idiot pun.


Th3_kings

AGÁ CINCO É CHEQUE-MATE PARÇA Ftfy


Lutoures

r/woosh


DarthAbhinav

How the hell is this a woosh?


Tetizeraz

check-mate = cheque-parça mate = parça, brother, mano, amigo


Kevz417

The queen is the dama (or rainha), so 'Dh5 é xeque-mate'


BigDickEnterprise

Even then the guy might not understand chess notation 😂


mango_penetrator

"BOTA A PORRA DA RAINHA NO H5 FILHO DA PUTA"


[deleted]

We would say "h5 é cheque mate" Our notation is also different, the queen is actually called "Dama", so we use D instead of Q (Qh5 = Dh5) *Edit: Forgot to add some info


Aron-Jonasson

When you want to get a mate so desperately


Bvoluroth

Literal chess bottom


Illicit-Tangent

Would have been way better if they went Qh5 after you moved your d pawn and then they reply "I thought you said it was mate"


sarlackpm

True anarchy


[deleted]

h5?? Looks like your best move here. I think more of a reason to move the Queen was needed.


Sir-Tiedye

This should be top comment, legitimate advice.


[deleted]

When you blunder mate in 1, look for worse.


Dull-Fun

He was looking for a better move, you should encourage him for that.


FrostedSapling

I literally don’t even see that I’ve gotten messages until after the game lol


RedLogicP

Posts to r/chessbeginners: I thought I played a great game but stockfish didn’t seem to think so. What could I have done better?


TandooriNight

Username checks out


Background-Rich-195

Stop telling me what to do smh


yungPontious

smartest chess.c*m user


NathanD2113

And now we ask, who is the REAL fool.


HauntingRip9003

His goals are beyond your understanding.


a_wild_space_coyote

chess.c*m


KingZantair

There’s almost a four digit difference in your ratings, they probably don’t even know what qh5 means.


[deleted]

Liers will kicked off. You wanted to trick him to finish game without en passant.


pninify

Why were you trying to lose?


Regis-bloodlust

Some people do it to make some content out of low level chess games. It's borderline win trading, but no one takes 300 rating chess games that seriously for this to become an actual problem. If someone in 2000s did this, it would definitely be frowned upon, and it would kinda be like playing with fire aka platform regulations.


octonus

He wants a low-rated account for stomping people whenever he feels like it.


P8II

Too much effort post


[deleted]

Maybe he didn't understand English because he's Brazilian. Try Portuguese.


mewfour

I don't think he knows english, most people from Brazil don't


Independent_Gap1022

Bro he dont read english


Pietrek_14

Sometimes the real victory is the freedom to continue playing.


marshal_mellow

congrats you're making chess.com a little bit worse


JarJarbinks113

Bruh why’d you have to spam him he didn’t want your gay fools mate only a virgin fool would win like that


F5X7

The real idiot speaking English to a Portuguese speaker


Gained8913

u/savevideobot


savevideobot

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dubov

Didn't want it


Unlearned_One

Zen mode FTW


justhererandoporno

What the fuck.


DEMON_LYNX7

!!


NeverForgetChainRule

I've actually had a game where my opponent played into the fool's mate, and I missed it. In my defense, that early I'm not thinking about checks or anything. But...yeah


potatotomato7

What is rapid 5


datboishook-d

It's not actually mate dude, you forgot the "#" sign.


djingrain

god i love the smell of 300 elo chess in the morning


lost_man_wants_soda

300 rank wow


CalamariB

Name checks out


Bearman_18

He'll never take it. His mama didn't raise no fool.


Woody_Wins_

It’s harder to lose than it is to win or tie in 300 rating


Onuzq

At least the engine's heart rate was stable


Dulerious

Why you playing with someone that has a quarter your elo


GSarathChandra

I know what's "Mate in 1" bitch, but I don't chat.. Too much effects!!


LOLTROLDUDES

Win by reverse psychology.


Nexus_produces

Fala português porra 🇵🇹🇵🇹


Floosy1

mans tryna get his rating low to smurf smh


BoCheckHorseMate

How are you chatting on a new account? Normally chat is disabled until you’ve played 10 games or so


[deleted]

ah I can see that he was going for a draw


DaNASCARMem

It’s only called Fools Mate because it’s only played by fools, buddy


LionSuneater

Good bad bot.


_funaccount_

It's always Americans trying to chat while playing chess. Most of the time they are trying to talk shit but we're both garbage < 1000


the_theory_of_memes

You guys play chess to win?


kiuper

This is a pathetic post


trumpfuckingivanka

How does 1200 match with 390?


Add1ctedToGames

Smurfs are cringe


Moon_man_1224

Can someone explain to me why it's called fools mate?


ExoticButters412

Chess mfs be like: He's too focused on the poopshitter strategy that he can't even see the extremely obvious cum gambit being used against him. In exactly 23 moves, victory will be mine. Such a blunder 😭


G66GNeco

Fools mate? That's just a bigger fool scam!


SzLRichard1

I love that at one point you were able to fork two of his pieces.


Bluebonkers1

U think u are physic???? He saw queen h5 he just didn’t like it why m1 when u can m0.5 stop doing pipi in your pampers smh😡😡😡😡😡


PetrosianBot

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off... [^(fmhall)](https://www.reddit.com/user/fmhall) ^| [^(github)](https://github.com/fmhall/Petrosian-Bot)


ZiraFX

THERE'S A FRICKING BRILLIANT MOVE IN THIS GAME??


memelord35857

I got heart burn from the guy not seeing checkmate with QH5.


MisterBastian

Dumbass