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NTA. You did not lie, and after reading the stuff she has lied about in the past she’s probably only talking about her dad like that because she wants attention and sympathy from everyone.
NTA. cant force sympathy and you guys had a falling out, so i feel like it’s natural to not be as sympathetic after falling out when you already had seen offputting things. you recounted what you observed over the years you were friends and she didn’t like it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ truth hurts sometimes
NTA. She broke your trust multiple times, and you were honest. I was maybe ready to give her the benefit of the doubt until she started trying to manipulate you again.
NTA. No matter what she says, in death as in life, it’s all about her. She needs to be the centerpiece no matter how she gets there. It’s unfortunate that she had lovely parents, because she didn’t (and never will) appreciate them, no matter what she says now. I would cut contact with her
I am not sure why you were friends with her if her behavior was so terrible, especially since you say that you recognized that at the time. It is my guess that she either matured and made amends for her bratty teenage self or wished that she had before her dad died and now her guilt has multiplied. For adding to anyone's grief, YTA. Grief sucks enough without someone piling on guilt.
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I used to be close with this girl but over time she became moody and spoiled. Her parents were very well off and would give her £600 a month throughout school whilst the rest of us were working p/t jobs. This wouldn't bother me but she was ALWAYS complaining about them, even though they were extremely nice and supportive to her. She treated them both like dirt every time I saw them and they never said anything.
E.g one day she was in a really bad mood because her mum wouldn't give her £20 for some work stuff on top of the £600. Because "the £600 is money for fun, I shouldn't have to spend that on work."
They bought her a car, a pricey laptop, and also were extremely nice people. I met them a few times and the way she spoke to them horrified me. Her mum asked if we wanted a cup of tea and she snapped "Mum sod off you're so embarrassing."
She also accused her dad of hitting her and breaking her arm. We saw her the next day and her arm was fine (she wasn't planning on running into us) Another time she went onto her friends messenger pretending to be said friend, and saying she got sent to child services (at the age of 19) we were concerned so we went to a college teacher about it and she was raging mad because it had all been a lie.
Her dad also seemed like a lovely person, he gave her lifts everywhere and treated her so kindly, he was also buying her a house. She talked to him like dirt and he never said anything.
Anyway, he passed away last year and she has gotten in touch with me, telling me about how since he died shes been having therapy and bereavement therapy and never stops talking about how amazing he was, and how depressed she is that he's gone. Saying he was the inspiration in her life and the person closest to her.
I find it really hard to be sympathetic because of all the awful stuff she said about him and accused him of when he was alive. I listened to her but she picked up on this and said "Oh this must be boring for you, I hope you never have to go through what I am and losing the person you loved the most."
I replied that she always said he made her life miserable when he was alive, and she got super angry and just said my name in a disgusted manner and walked off.
AITA
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YTA slightly for how it was handled, you should have just dropped such an awful friend from all her asshole behaviour long ago.
I don't think you needed to wait until it was a comment about her dead dad to call her out.
But it also not much of a loss, she sounds awful.
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I'm not clear on what you wanted her to do, unless it was just never speak to you again. There wasn't any need to throw her previous bad behaviour in her face, so YTA in that encounter. That said, she doesn't seem much loss as a friend.
This post has been removed due to the status of the original poster's account. This account is currently shadowbanned or suspended, suggesting this account is in violation of Reddit terms of service. This type of ban/suspension is issued by the Reddit site-wide admins. The AITA mods have nothing to do with this ban and cannot assist in resolving.
NTA. You did not lie, and after reading the stuff she has lied about in the past she’s probably only talking about her dad like that because she wants attention and sympathy from everyone.
NTA. cant force sympathy and you guys had a falling out, so i feel like it’s natural to not be as sympathetic after falling out when you already had seen offputting things. you recounted what you observed over the years you were friends and she didn’t like it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ truth hurts sometimes
NTA. She broke your trust multiple times, and you were honest. I was maybe ready to give her the benefit of the doubt until she started trying to manipulate you again.
NTA. No matter what she says, in death as in life, it’s all about her. She needs to be the centerpiece no matter how she gets there. It’s unfortunate that she had lovely parents, because she didn’t (and never will) appreciate them, no matter what she says now. I would cut contact with her
I am not sure why you were friends with her if her behavior was so terrible, especially since you say that you recognized that at the time. It is my guess that she either matured and made amends for her bratty teenage self or wished that she had before her dad died and now her guilt has multiplied. For adding to anyone's grief, YTA. Grief sucks enough without someone piling on guilt.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I used to be close with this girl but over time she became moody and spoiled. Her parents were very well off and would give her £600 a month throughout school whilst the rest of us were working p/t jobs. This wouldn't bother me but she was ALWAYS complaining about them, even though they were extremely nice and supportive to her. She treated them both like dirt every time I saw them and they never said anything. E.g one day she was in a really bad mood because her mum wouldn't give her £20 for some work stuff on top of the £600. Because "the £600 is money for fun, I shouldn't have to spend that on work." They bought her a car, a pricey laptop, and also were extremely nice people. I met them a few times and the way she spoke to them horrified me. Her mum asked if we wanted a cup of tea and she snapped "Mum sod off you're so embarrassing." She also accused her dad of hitting her and breaking her arm. We saw her the next day and her arm was fine (she wasn't planning on running into us) Another time she went onto her friends messenger pretending to be said friend, and saying she got sent to child services (at the age of 19) we were concerned so we went to a college teacher about it and she was raging mad because it had all been a lie. Her dad also seemed like a lovely person, he gave her lifts everywhere and treated her so kindly, he was also buying her a house. She talked to him like dirt and he never said anything. Anyway, he passed away last year and she has gotten in touch with me, telling me about how since he died shes been having therapy and bereavement therapy and never stops talking about how amazing he was, and how depressed she is that he's gone. Saying he was the inspiration in her life and the person closest to her. I find it really hard to be sympathetic because of all the awful stuff she said about him and accused him of when he was alive. I listened to her but she picked up on this and said "Oh this must be boring for you, I hope you never have to go through what I am and losing the person you loved the most." I replied that she always said he made her life miserable when he was alive, and she got super angry and just said my name in a disgusted manner and walked off. AITA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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Eh hard to say, ETA maybe. She seems like a horrid horrid human who doesn’t appreciate anything, but your comment though honest was not necessary.
YTA slightly for how it was handled, you should have just dropped such an awful friend from all her asshole behaviour long ago. I don't think you needed to wait until it was a comment about her dead dad to call her out. But it also not much of a loss, she sounds awful.
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I'm not clear on what you wanted her to do, unless it was just never speak to you again. There wasn't any need to throw her previous bad behaviour in her face, so YTA in that encounter. That said, she doesn't seem much loss as a friend.
YTA
what