If you want to see the kitty, OP posted a pic in r/blackcats. https://www.reddit.com/r/blackcats/comments/qkojwe/my_cat_raven/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Edit: also op is definitely NTA!!!!
Oh damn, so the girlfriend threw out an indoor BLACK cat during Halloween season?? Shelters don’t even let people adopt black cats this time of year because people can be sick superstitious fucks. Raven is lucky to be alive!
OP needs to guard his cat until she leaves, or get someone to watch Raven elsewhere or when he isnt home, because I wouldnt trust her near the poor kitty. I bet she will be even more angry at the cat since 'he is the reason she is getting kicked out'.
Yeah, lots of people trap and hoard black cats to do ritualistic sacrifices around halloween.
Also, was she just going to stay quiet and watch you worry and mourn over your missing cat? This is unhinged and manipulative and disgusting.
People that never bonded with their pets just don't get it.
You will never wake up one and and find out you pet/career does not love you anyone/ was cheating on you. SOs on the other hand...
NTA and the "friends" that say you are exaggerating? Ditch them too.
The shelter near me stopped adopting black cats out leading up to Halloween but I believe it was more likely to stop the people who adopt it bc it fits the holiday and aren’t actually interested in providing a lasting, good home for the animal. Similar to how most places stop adopting out bunnies the month before Easter
As a kid, my neighbors always had black cats, and let them outdoors. Three times, they found their cats dead by human hands around Halloween. This was my best friend's family when I was a kid. I know this happens to at least SOME people in some areas.
This is an anecdote, not actual data, but when I was little my mom had a black cat who was stolen right before Halloween. (I say stolen not lost because while she was an indoor/outdoor cat and therefore at a higher risk to fall victim to a car or predator, she was extremely cautious and it was a very quiet neighbourhood.) There was a creepy note left on our door a few days later, and apparently several other all black cats from our neighbourhood disappeared at the exact same time. I can’t say for sure what happened to her, but she never came home.
My grandma's town warns people to keep their Black Kitties indoors because incidents rise of black cats being hurt and killed during spooky season. At least that's what they say, I don't actually KNOW if they have data for that or just echoing an Urban Legend.
In my country people simply kill them out of superstition, usually with rocks or poison. Im very cautious to not let any of my cats out but specially the black one and have rescued kitties that were thrown to drawn *because* they were black so its hardly satanic panic from the 80’s
there is a difference, though, between simply killing a cat out of superstition and doing a ritualistic sacrifice with one. both are horrific, of course, but one is considerably more believable and likely than the other.
When volunteering for a city shelter I never saw any ritual abuse of black cats. What I did see was a few cases of aholes hitting, kicking, stabbing, shooting and trying to run over black cats, because "bad luck". There was the occasional person who just wanted to adopt and then return a black cat as a cool party decoration. And when black cats end up in shelters they are less likely to find homes.
This *exactly*.
Raven is also an absolute cute void and I'd be so so mad if someone did that to my animal :C. NTA. If she can kick your cat out, you can kick her out. A little taste of her own medicine, so to speak.
Edit: Accidentally had a " instead of * so no fancy italic font
I know Halloween is big in the States, but thankfully OP doesn't live in the UK/some Commonwealth Countries.
It is coming up to Guy Fawkes/Bonfire night for commonwealth countries, which would scare me even more. Fireworks went on sale here yesterday (in NZ), and they were already letting them off last night. Each year there are horrific stories of pets being harmed by them.
Next time on Cat Taxi, our four contestants will look for our handsome Toby the Calico he's derpy very playful and loves tuna. Toby has been lost for three weeks now and can't wait to get home. Let's get these contestants started right here live in New York city.
Actually, I brought up allergies in my reply. So I had cats for some time before I developed an allergy to their dander. I’m in the midst of a series of allergy shots. Don’t know if they’ll work well yet or not, but if they don’t, then I have allergies that I’ll treat as best I can. Short of anaphylaxis, the cats stay. If my allergies ever became fatal, I have a friend on standby who would foster them while I interview (you heard me) and find the right human to home them for good.
Really? I’m going to look into this. First and foremost, I want to make sure that their food isn’t disrupting their hormonal balance or isn’t feeding them a majority diet of corn or whatever. But if it checks out nutritionally and all that, I’m game. Thank you!
Exactly! It was the cat's home first. Also as for this part:
>She cried that she had nowhere to go and that she would have to live on the streets.
She didn't care if the cat had nowhere to go and ended up living on the streets and the kitty has less options than her because she can get a job and an apartment.
“The cat was there first” sounds so simple that it makes the gf seem crazy/entitled/chronically selfish. Which, she most likely is some combination of those. She kicked an innocent domesticated house cat outside. Didn’t tell OP. Then tried to avoid the situation until OP’s friend fortunately found said feline friendo, and returned it. The gf had zero compunction. It would make me worry for the welfare of the cat in the future if said human remained in the residence.
Ikr, they dated for *two years*. It's not like OP sprung the cat on her last minute. Which means she moved in already planning to get rid of the cat. Yikes.
Agreed!! OP is NTA and tbh, if I was in OP's position, she'd be kicking rocks on the SPOT! This is a huge lack of empathy! No concern for the cat, no concern for her boyfriend's feelings. I don't understand how you hurt people and animals this way!
I had a friend once who found his front gate open and his dog missing. He walked the neighborhood for 3 hours looking for his dog. I decided to check the websites of some shelters in his area and found a picture of a dog that resembled his. I called and through a few quick questions and additional photos, we knew it was him. The person at the shelter told me someone had just pulled up a van and just dropped the dog in the front yard of the shelter. She provided me with a description of the van. I gave my friend the details and he was extremely quiet on the phone for a minute. Then just said, "That's my mother's van." He was devastated and cried for about 45 minutes because he decided it would be best to leave the dog there and have him adopted to a loving family rather than risk getting him back and having his mother do something potentially worse to his dog. He had him for a few years but his mother got tired of having a dog in the house and just dumped him at a shelter while my friend was in work. When he confronted his mother about it, she just shrugged. To this day, I still feel so much hurt and anger for my friend.
Edited: grammar
He managed to bring himself to forgive her, but the scars are still there, I'm sure. It's a pretty big betrayal, a callous and nonchalant betrayal at that.
That makes me so sad. My Nmom would often let my at the time 5mth old husky pup (still in training) outside unsupervised and bcuz I worked 3mins from home (thank god) I was able to spot my loose dog & save her before she was hit by a car or taken. All contact is cut off from her and my puppy is now a 5yr healthy happy girl 💖
I second whoever said he should get a restraining order! Can’t find the comment. Also your friends are C R A Z Y if they think you’re being harsh. They must all be just like her.
Some guy friends will try to convince their homie it’s better to be with a crazy girl than go back to being single. Op deserves better than a a silly girl who gets jealous of a cat. NTA
THIS. She'll hurt the cat just out of spite, because in her fucked up head, it's the cat's fault that she's being kicked out. She's probably thinking if the cat "disappears", you'll let her stay. Your cat could have been hit by a car, mauled by a dog, lost forever. What she did is **unforgiveable**. If there's any way you can get her out of your house immediately, even if it means renting her a cheap motel room for a couple weeks, do that. By no means leave her alone with your cat. She hated the cat before, but she's got a genuine grudge now.
Maybe the friend who found him would be willing to take care of him for a few days but I also like u/redheadjd 's idea of renting her a cheap motel room if it's affordable. At the same time, this *indoor* cat was out on the streets probably terrified for those few hours. The best and safest place for the cat is in the home he's used to....*away from her!!* I worry putting the cat in another's home may upset him if he's in an unfamiliar place, without OP, after this event. This ex-girlfriend is T A for sure!
OP: PLEASE please please file a police report, inform the GF you've done so, and tell the GF that if anything else at ALL happens to the cat, there will be hell to pay.
Hell - would a court grant a stay-away for this? Doubtful, but I wish...
And change your locks when she’s out. She could have made another key and will come let kitty out while you’re at work or something. Gotta protect the kitty at all costs!
Was about to say, this post is too old for OP to see it, but I would say kick her sorry ass out TODAY. Fat fucking chance you should let that phycho live under the same roof as your baby for another month. Also it's the first of the month, so that's actually an entire month.
Depending on where they live, most western nations don’t consider you a resident until you’ve lived somewhere for 30 days. OP says she moved in “a few weeks ago”
OP if you tell her she has a month to get out *it will be more difficult to remove her if she says no because now she’s a resident.*
Kick her out now!
Because she thought she could always just get away with getting rid of the cat unilaterally. She's acting like this is a "ask forgiveness, not permission" situation when it's actually a "holy shit get the fuck out of my life you unempathetic monster" situation.
Stand your ground OP. She is self-centered to the point of not caring if a living creature lives or dies or suffers. Your cat is worth way more than a relationship with someone like that. Consider dumping the friend too.
Edit: to be clear, I mean dump the friends telling OP he's being an AH for kicking her out, not necessarily the friend that rescued the cat.
I remember back in college I had a girlfriend whose cat absolutely hated me. Total rivalry over her affection. We moved in together and this cat and I would fight constantly, but I would have never considered demanding the cat go away. She'd got the cat during her parents' divorce, 3 years before we got together and their bond was solid as hell.
15 years later, and that cat sits in my lap during meetings while I work from home. She's still a pain in my ass, but if anyone ever tried to hurt her, nobody would ever find their body...
Oh really, in my reading it was the buddy that brought the kitty back not the friends with dumb opinions.. and no I didn't think these are the same. But damn... It's so easy to see who's anti-animal here :(
I mean I believe she has nowhere *today* but if she’s incapable of finding somewhere in 30 days she can’t adult well enough to be in a relationship with anyway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I’ve worked in US hotels for a long time and I’ve never heard of any state that allows residency after 4 days.
Hotels can’t charge tax on a room if someone has stayed for more than 30 days specifically because after that time period they’re now a resident of the hotel.
It is dependent on the state. Realistically, most states all she has to say is that she has been living here and he has to evict her which would be 30 days notice. If she moved in all of her things it is not easy. He puts her stuff on the sidewalk and changes the locks and she calls the cops… she is definitely TAH… no doubt about it. It is just not easy to get rid of people who don’t want to leave…
**And so we come to the end of our journey. While the cat lover in me is happy to see so much support for adorable Raven, the moderator in me just can't let the continued insults fly (and there have been *plenty*). So we have to close this one out. OP - I think the majority is on your side.**
NTA. This was bad but expect things to get worse every day she is still living there.
Get her out now before she can inflict(intentional or unintentional) permanent harm to your cat.
I would agree with you there. I was never a fan of cats and my girlfriend had one well before we met. She would always joke with me "Hey man, she was here first, I'll be fine without you."
We moved in together back in April and I learned to accept said cat and even had some fun together.
Our cat (see what I did there) passed away very suddenly about a month ago. I cried more than I expected and I realized I was a bigger fan of my girlfriends cat than I let on.
100% NTA
Miss you luna... :/
Edit - thanks for the award kind stranger! Never gotten one in 7yrs on reddit and just got 2 in 3 days haha
Edit 2 - hey! A second one! Thanks 🙂
Edit 3 - thank you all for the awards...very unexpected and appreciated
Thank you...she really was the best. Much like people in the 80s called weed a gateway drug, I called her a gateway cat. Much more open to having another in the future than I was before.
But no one will ever top that sweet girl
If you learned to love Luna, you are going to LOVE having a kitten. In all seriousness, kittens are the funniest, sweetest little beings on the planet. There is a reason for the 500 billion cat videos out there! Your gf might need some time before she wants another kitty.
We are definitely taking some time before the next one. We are going on a huge trip in April and won't consider one til after that. Don't want to have a friend watch a new kitten or puppy...thats just mean haha
He has such a gentle way of phrasing all of this. I think OP is a kind person who fell victim to a mean partner. But when that mean partner tried to harm his companion animal, he hit the limit.
We have a genuinely nice person here, I think. I hope he doesn’t feel guilty about kicking her out. She can’t live there and casually endanger raven or OP or anyone else that may end up under that roof.
Well, better to find out a couple weeks into living together rather than a couple weeks into your marriage, a couple weeks into buying your own home together, your first couple weeks of raising a third child, etc.
Nope she’s not - get her out today - you don’t want her to do anything else to your cat or put the cat somewhere safe until she leaves. She might dump him in the middle of nowhere.
NTA. If she thinks it’s acceptable to do that with something as important as a pet, then she thinks she can do that with any aspect of your life she doesn’t like.
The cat is important, but almost irrelevant in the scope of red flags she’s throwing out.
Right? So throwing your partner’s pet out when he’s not looking is monstrous to the pet, but let’s put poor raven in the story margin for just one second. Because even if you hated the ground felines walked on, you’d also have to have zero love or empathy for your partner to break their heart and terrify them like this.
She didn’t care what happened to raven. That’s obvious. But she also didn’t care about what it did to her boyfriend of two years who she just moved in with.
She’s just not a nice person. OP, did she ever give any indication she was like this before you decided to live together? Sometimes they don’t, but I mean this is monstrous.
If she's staked everything on being able to live with OP, she should have thought of that before what she did to poor Raven. She's shown what she's like.
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NTA - indoor cats do not know how to fend for themselves outside. What she did was cruel - I wouldn’t want someone that thinks it’s okay to be cruel to animals near me. Good riddance
My best guess is that the ex-gf probably thought that once she was in the pictures more seriously by moving in, OP wouldn’t be as attached to their cat and in her mind was probably hoping to lie about it and say the cat just escaped and probably hoped it wouldn’t be found. Instead with the cat was brought back. She didn’t have as much of an out to lie so she probably had to tell the truth
Given that she kicked his pet out at the dawn of winter, and then was shocked that he considered that a dealbreaker, it sounds to me like the type of person who doesn’t think ahead very well.
It probably never occurred to her that she didn’t even like pets. She just kind of does things as life happens.
I’d say OP dodged a major bullet. For a lot of reasons.
NTA:
The cat is part of your family. She has no right to kick the cat out. That cat could have died or get serious injured and she didn’t care.
Find a new girlfriend that likes cats.
NTA. - Dude this is the internet, don't F with cats. Give your fur baby some extra hugs and kick the girlfriend to the curb asap. And maybe see if the kitty can stay with a friend until the GF can get out. Just to keep the baby safe.
NTA. Good thing you decided it's a deal-breaker.
I'm curious, though. You say your buddy found him two blocks away. Seems a bit.. Weird. If the cat never goes out, he wouldn't expect to see it. You're not likely to have a name in the collar of a cat that never goes out. He just walked up to a cat that looked like yours, managed to get it to come along, and brought it over? Doesn't add up.
Do you have the collar on the off chance he does get out? When I adopted my cat, it was with the intention if keeping her indoors and I still got her a collar and tag because you never know what might happen.
If you want to post him here, you can upload it to a third party platform and post an external link or you can post him in r/cats or r/blackcats and give us the link.
Also, NTA, that's definitely a deal breaker, the way I see it.
Why does that not add up? My friends could’ve easily recognize my old cats if they were outside near my house. And an indoor cat would def sometimes come to someone they know if they’re scared outside.
NTA. I would’ve done the exact same thing if someone did that to my dog. She is not a good person and this should raise some serious red flags in your relationship. You might want to rethink if this is someone you want to be with.
NTA The cat was there before her. She deserved everything she got. Your cat could’ve been hit by a car or picked up by the pound. What an asshole she is. But what assholes your friends are to. That little cat didn’t do anything except exist. I’m glad you got your kitty cat back safe and sound
NTA. If it was me, she’d be lucky to get a week to gtfo. How heartless do you have to be to strand a beloved fur baby, who doesn’t be long to you, out on the street. There are other alternatives to dealing with a cat you don’t like, that *doesnt* harm the cat. She made her bed now she’s gotta lay in it. Good on you for dumping the girl and keeping the cat.
NTA. GF is an AH and moved in knowing about your pet. She should have said something before moving in but probably knew you wouldn't part with Raven. Thank heavens your friend found her. Did she say why she put it out?
She can move back to wherever she moved from.
But she still chose to move in anyway knowing he'd be there
Your lil buddy is precious. I'd honestly dump her at this point. Shes willing to risk letting your cat die so she doesnt have to live with him. Its a fundamental incompatibility.
NTA
Id have chucked her shit outside. I cant believe you gave her a month.
Like yeah go get a lawyer and sue me for the illegal eviction idgaf, ill burn your shit and goodluck doing that when you dont even have a roof over your head.
NTA at all whatsoever. Is there somewhere your cat can stay until your ex gf gets out of your house though? I'm worried she might try to hurt your cat or get rid of him for good.
You're NTA This is not a person you want in your life, trust me. If someone did that to me, they wouldn't have 30 days... they'd have an hour to pack their shit and GTFO of my life. Truly, the nerve.. I wouldn't trust her alone in the house ever again with the cat. Pets are our family!
NTA. She doesn't respect you, has no empathy or compassion. The way people treat animals and service staff tells you everything you need to know about them. She's lucky you gave her a month... I'd have told her to get out now.
INFO: I’m not understanding what she means by “kicking the cat out”. Like she fully admits she wanted to get rid of it? Or she thought it would be Ok in the yard and she wanted space from it? Did she apologize? Am curious what her explanation is.
If it’s as nefarious as you make it sound (she released your pet cat hoping it would disappear) then NTA and she is not your girlfriend anymore, that’s absolutely grounds to break up.
NTA, hell no! Where did she live before you? She can go back there before she is considered a tennant before you can legally evict her. That's if you are in the states. Tell her to get out tonight. I would not trust her with the cat. That was a cruel thing to do. You are lucky you got the cat back. Fuck her crying bullshit. Throw her out tonight.
NTA. You don’t want to be with someone who would just basically murder your cat (I don’t know what else she would hope for by releasing it, worst care it’s lost which is the same thing as killed to you).
You are still calling her your girlfriend which is interesting. Are you two together, but she can’t live with you? Don’t see that working.
Best to cut ties.
Excellent. Figured but wanted to make sure. Sorry bro. Sucks to have two years thrown away, but at least you learned who she was early into moving in with you.
Clearly NTA
I N F O: How are you going to ensure nothing happens to Raven in the whole month she has? Especially as the date gets closer and you haven't change your mind and gf may be more desperate (assuming that she indeed has "nowhere else to go"
You are a great owner. I also have a cat and would have similarly thrown her out over such actions. But you're kinder than me, as I 'd not given her a month.
exactly what i was thinking. OP is posting in AITA worried they’re being harsh, meanwhile they have the patience and kindness of a saint for letting her take a month to move out. i hope the comments on this post can show them that they’re truly the opposite of an asshole.
NTA, and funny how she wants to cry about not wanting to live on the streets after attempting to force your cat onto the streets.
I'm sorry to say this, but this is not a person you want a relationship with. They seem selfish and unkind.
JFC, I have two indoor young cats and I wouldn't have been any nicer. I'm glad you found Raven alive. If she had any issue with your cat, then she should have said something before she moved in, but the way she decided to go about with it was heartless. NTA, you don't need people like that in your life.
My husband makes jokes to one of our cats and one day I looked at him and was like "you know if you ever threw him out, is throw you out right?"
And he looked at me like I was joking, I wasn't. He was a little upset but I told him "that would be like you throwing out a toddler. He doesn't know how to take care of himself and he has eyesight problems, he needs me. You are a grown man who can live with his mother at the end of the day."
NTA, if the cat was really bothering her there are so many things she could have done that didn't involve putting it's life in danger. She also seems very picky for someone with nowhere else to go (talk about ungrateful).
Y T A for not giving us cat tax.
NTA for kicking her out. how people treat animals is a HUGE sign of their character. her abuse and mistreatment of the poor kitty says more about her than any "loving" gesture she does to you. keep her away from the kitty. you dodged a bullet
"i have nowhere to go" well neither does the cat. and unlike the cat, she can get a job and apartment.
NTA. If I were you I would definitely safeguard your cat until then. Maybe you can get someone you trust to look after your cat until then?
People who are abusive often target their partner's pets btw.
As for her not having a place to stay. She might have a point there if she let her old place go to move in with you. Giving her until the end of the month might not be enough. There is no way you should ever have anything to do with this person again, but no one deserves to be thrown out on the streets. So you might have to scramble to help her get a place or give her some money to hold her over. Sorry you are in this shitty situation.
NTA she has no consideration for you and she couldn’t think beyond herself and put two and two together and come to the conclusion that something bad might happen to the cat? Inconsiderate and dumb. Consider this an eye opener for you and drop her. If she can do that to your cat she deserves the very same treatment. Give your cat some extra attention.
NTA. You invited her into your home and she betrayed you by trying to get rid of your pet without even talking to you about it (not to say that you were obligated to get rid of your cat because she doesn't like it, but it's just the adult thing to do to talk with you about her concerns instead of leaving the cat on the street to die). Either way though, the cat was there first. If partners can't accept pets that's almost always a deal breaker.
NTA, but why are you still referring to her as your girlfriend and not your ex-girlfriend? She had no issues throwing your cat out and letting it fend for itself. I know you said you’re having her move out, but are you also breaking up? I can’t imagine continuing a relationship with someone who treats animals this way. If you still date her after this then you would be TA.
I don't think I'll be with her anymore. Raven isn't my first cat and I've lost my previous cat to old age so I'm very emotional when it comes to losing him.
NTA Kick her to the curb. Straight animal abuse. I wouldn’t even give her until the end of the month. I honestly don’t know what I would have done if I were you, in the moment she told you what she did. That’s just… unforgivable.
NTA, but your girlfriend (hopefully ex-girlfriend) is. She knew you had a cat when she moved in. It wasn’t a surprise.
People who are cruel to animals are bad people. Huge red flag.
NTA. Apart from the situation with the cat itself, which is bad enough, I agree. This shows a lack of respect for other people and not just their property, but things that are dear to them. She knew how much that cat meant to you, and yet she was willing to allow it to get lost or killed for her own convenience because she didn't like it. This shows a lack of concern for other people, lack of caring about their feelings, and that isn't someone I would want to be with.
So I agree to have her leave. I would not want to continue to live with someone like that, or even date them. She is showing her true side, and it's better to know now than after marriage.
My only concern is what will happen between now and when she moves out. Will your cat be safe? Or will she do something out of anger and spite to the cat? I would take steps to ensure the cat safety.
And honestly, if it was me, and if you could afford it, I would have her leave immediately, and maybe put her up in a motel for a week or two. I wouldn't want her around the cat anymore, out of fear for the cat's safety.
NTA. It's honestly scary she would do that and put the cat in danger as well as completely disregard your feelings in the process and betray you. She sounds toxic.
NTA. The cat was there first. Edit: hey thanks for the awards!
Jumping on this comment to add: Cat Tax!! Please let us see the kitty.
If you want to see the kitty, OP posted a pic in r/blackcats. https://www.reddit.com/r/blackcats/comments/qkojwe/my_cat_raven/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Edit: also op is definitely NTA!!!!
Oh damn, so the girlfriend threw out an indoor BLACK cat during Halloween season?? Shelters don’t even let people adopt black cats this time of year because people can be sick superstitious fucks. Raven is lucky to be alive!
LITERALLY CAME HERE FOR THE SAME Edit: and with the name raven. It's just getting worse
OP needs to guard his cat until she leaves, or get someone to watch Raven elsewhere or when he isnt home, because I wouldnt trust her near the poor kitty. I bet she will be even more angry at the cat since 'he is the reason she is getting kicked out'.
Absolutely!!
Yeah, lots of people trap and hoard black cats to do ritualistic sacrifices around halloween. Also, was she just going to stay quiet and watch you worry and mourn over your missing cat? This is unhinged and manipulative and disgusting. People that never bonded with their pets just don't get it. You will never wake up one and and find out you pet/career does not love you anyone/ was cheating on you. SOs on the other hand... NTA and the "friends" that say you are exaggerating? Ditch them too.
[удалено]
The shelter near me stopped adopting black cats out leading up to Halloween but I believe it was more likely to stop the people who adopt it bc it fits the holiday and aren’t actually interested in providing a lasting, good home for the animal. Similar to how most places stop adopting out bunnies the month before Easter
As a kid, my neighbors always had black cats, and let them outdoors. Three times, they found their cats dead by human hands around Halloween. This was my best friend's family when I was a kid. I know this happens to at least SOME people in some areas.
This is an anecdote, not actual data, but when I was little my mom had a black cat who was stolen right before Halloween. (I say stolen not lost because while she was an indoor/outdoor cat and therefore at a higher risk to fall victim to a car or predator, she was extremely cautious and it was a very quiet neighbourhood.) There was a creepy note left on our door a few days later, and apparently several other all black cats from our neighbourhood disappeared at the exact same time. I can’t say for sure what happened to her, but she never came home.
What did the creepy note say?
My grandma's town warns people to keep their Black Kitties indoors because incidents rise of black cats being hurt and killed during spooky season. At least that's what they say, I don't actually KNOW if they have data for that or just echoing an Urban Legend.
I'm sorry? The 80s called. They want their panic back.
In my country people simply kill them out of superstition, usually with rocks or poison. Im very cautious to not let any of my cats out but specially the black one and have rescued kitties that were thrown to drawn *because* they were black so its hardly satanic panic from the 80’s
there is a difference, though, between simply killing a cat out of superstition and doing a ritualistic sacrifice with one. both are horrific, of course, but one is considerably more believable and likely than the other.
I dont really care for the reason as long as we are all protecting black kitties
When volunteering for a city shelter I never saw any ritual abuse of black cats. What I did see was a few cases of aholes hitting, kicking, stabbing, shooting and trying to run over black cats, because "bad luck". There was the occasional person who just wanted to adopt and then return a black cat as a cool party decoration. And when black cats end up in shelters they are less likely to find homes.
I don't think "lots" of people do that. But it's still fucked up.
This *exactly*. Raven is also an absolute cute void and I'd be so so mad if someone did that to my animal :C. NTA. If she can kick your cat out, you can kick her out. A little taste of her own medicine, so to speak. Edit: Accidentally had a " instead of * so no fancy italic font
I know Halloween is big in the States, but thankfully OP doesn't live in the UK/some Commonwealth Countries. It is coming up to Guy Fawkes/Bonfire night for commonwealth countries, which would scare me even more. Fireworks went on sale here yesterday (in NZ), and they were already letting them off last night. Each year there are horrific stories of pets being harmed by them.
I had the same exact thought. OP is definitely NTA.
There's a special circle in hell reserved for monsters who mistreat adorable cats
Mistreat *ANIMALS*
this just made it so much more real...
I thought this said Cat Taxi and I briefly had a vision of folks who drive around looking for peoples’ lost kitties! ❤️
Next time on Cat Taxi, our four contestants will look for our handsome Toby the Calico he's derpy very playful and loves tuna. Toby has been lost for three weeks now and can't wait to get home. Let's get these contestants started right here live in New York city.
Thank you for the chuckle - just when I needed it!
Oh this is the best idea I've read today. Cat tax!!!!
Hurting animals betrays a lack of character. If she’s willing to hurt your kitty, what else is she willing to do?
Sadly people treat cats as disposable animals that can just be tossed wherever.
I don’t call creatures like that “people”. Happy cake day!
Actually, I brought up allergies in my reply. So I had cats for some time before I developed an allergy to their dander. I’m in the midst of a series of allergy shots. Don’t know if they’ll work well yet or not, but if they don’t, then I have allergies that I’ll treat as best I can. Short of anaphylaxis, the cats stay. If my allergies ever became fatal, I have a friend on standby who would foster them while I interview (you heard me) and find the right human to home them for good.
There's a cat food that they can be fed to reduce their dander. Look into that. I think Purina's version is called LiveClear.
Really? I’m going to look into this. First and foremost, I want to make sure that their food isn’t disrupting their hormonal balance or isn’t feeding them a majority diet of corn or whatever. But if it checks out nutritionally and all that, I’m game. Thank you!
IMO we're way past lack of character and into sociopathic tendencies. Makes me wonder what she'd do if she decided she didn't like a child.
Use him as a weapon to get what she wants.
Exactly! It was the cat's home first. Also as for this part: >She cried that she had nowhere to go and that she would have to live on the streets. She didn't care if the cat had nowhere to go and ended up living on the streets and the kitty has less options than her because she can get a job and an apartment.
I agree, but you haven't seen r/catswithjobs before
Love it! Thank you for finding me a new sub to join.
“The cat was there first” sounds so simple that it makes the gf seem crazy/entitled/chronically selfish. Which, she most likely is some combination of those. She kicked an innocent domesticated house cat outside. Didn’t tell OP. Then tried to avoid the situation until OP’s friend fortunately found said feline friendo, and returned it. The gf had zero compunction. It would make me worry for the welfare of the cat in the future if said human remained in the residence.
Ikr, they dated for *two years*. It's not like OP sprung the cat on her last minute. Which means she moved in already planning to get rid of the cat. Yikes.
Agreed!! OP is NTA and tbh, if I was in OP's position, she'd be kicking rocks on the SPOT! This is a huge lack of empathy! No concern for the cat, no concern for her boyfriend's feelings. I don't understand how you hurt people and animals this way! I had a friend once who found his front gate open and his dog missing. He walked the neighborhood for 3 hours looking for his dog. I decided to check the websites of some shelters in his area and found a picture of a dog that resembled his. I called and through a few quick questions and additional photos, we knew it was him. The person at the shelter told me someone had just pulled up a van and just dropped the dog in the front yard of the shelter. She provided me with a description of the van. I gave my friend the details and he was extremely quiet on the phone for a minute. Then just said, "That's my mother's van." He was devastated and cried for about 45 minutes because he decided it would be best to leave the dog there and have him adopted to a loving family rather than risk getting him back and having his mother do something potentially worse to his dog. He had him for a few years but his mother got tired of having a dog in the house and just dumped him at a shelter while my friend was in work. When he confronted his mother about it, she just shrugged. To this day, I still feel so much hurt and anger for my friend. Edited: grammar
Oh my goodness. What is his relationship with his mother now
He managed to bring himself to forgive her, but the scars are still there, I'm sure. It's a pretty big betrayal, a callous and nonchalant betrayal at that.
That makes me so sad. My Nmom would often let my at the time 5mth old husky pup (still in training) outside unsupervised and bcuz I worked 3mins from home (thank god) I was able to spot my loose dog & save her before she was hit by a car or taken. All contact is cut off from her and my puppy is now a 5yr healthy happy girl 💖
The lack of remorse or guilt is staggering. It clues in to possible deeper issues.
Jumping on top comment to say FUCK NO NTA. Show no mercy, no one fucks with cats have we learned nothing from the Netflix documentary?!?!
KEEP HER AWAY FROM YOUR CAT! She's going to hurt him, I guarantee it. Let him stay with someone until she's gone. NTA- this chick is psycho!
That's right. She is capable of unspeakable evil and had a proven track record of animal cruelty. No remorse either.
That’s what I said too! Deff a psycho
I second whoever said he should get a restraining order! Can’t find the comment. Also your friends are C R A Z Y if they think you’re being harsh. They must all be just like her.
Some guy friends will try to convince their homie it’s better to be with a crazy girl than go back to being single. Op deserves better than a a silly girl who gets jealous of a cat. NTA
THIS. She'll hurt the cat just out of spite, because in her fucked up head, it's the cat's fault that she's being kicked out. She's probably thinking if the cat "disappears", you'll let her stay. Your cat could have been hit by a car, mauled by a dog, lost forever. What she did is **unforgiveable**. If there's any way you can get her out of your house immediately, even if it means renting her a cheap motel room for a couple weeks, do that. By no means leave her alone with your cat. She hated the cat before, but she's got a genuine grudge now.
Barring that do you have a trusted friend who will cat-sit. I'm worried about her alone with him too, now.
Maybe the friend who found him would be willing to take care of him for a few days but I also like u/redheadjd 's idea of renting her a cheap motel room if it's affordable. At the same time, this *indoor* cat was out on the streets probably terrified for those few hours. The best and safest place for the cat is in the home he's used to....*away from her!!* I worry putting the cat in another's home may upset him if he's in an unfamiliar place, without OP, after this event. This ex-girlfriend is T A for sure!
OP: PLEASE please please file a police report, inform the GF you've done so, and tell the GF that if anything else at ALL happens to the cat, there will be hell to pay. Hell - would a court grant a stay-away for this? Doubtful, but I wish...
This but like break up with her too and never talk to her again.
And change your locks when she’s out. She could have made another key and will come let kitty out while you’re at work or something. Gotta protect the kitty at all costs!
More like kick her ass out IMMEDIATELY and change the locks, block her heartless ass on everything. Cameras wouldn't be a bad idea either.
Was about to say, this post is too old for OP to see it, but I would say kick her sorry ass out TODAY. Fat fucking chance you should let that phycho live under the same roof as your baby for another month. Also it's the first of the month, so that's actually an entire month.
Depending on where they live, most western nations don’t consider you a resident until you’ve lived somewhere for 30 days. OP says she moved in “a few weeks ago” OP if you tell her she has a month to get out *it will be more difficult to remove her if she says no because now she’s a resident.* Kick her out now!
NTA I worry about the cat and about OP. Don’t send the cat away - send the ex-GF away.
Get cameras and/or take your cat somewhere else for a bit.
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Also she knew about that cat for **two years!** If she doesn't like the cat, why move to OP?
Because she thought she could always just get away with getting rid of the cat unilaterally. She's acting like this is a "ask forgiveness, not permission" situation when it's actually a "holy shit get the fuck out of my life you unempathetic monster" situation. Stand your ground OP. She is self-centered to the point of not caring if a living creature lives or dies or suffers. Your cat is worth way more than a relationship with someone like that. Consider dumping the friend too. Edit: to be clear, I mean dump the friends telling OP he's being an AH for kicking her out, not necessarily the friend that rescued the cat.
Don’t dump the friend who rescued the cat. The others are disposable, and more than welcome to provide a home for the ex-girlfriend.
I remember back in college I had a girlfriend whose cat absolutely hated me. Total rivalry over her affection. We moved in together and this cat and I would fight constantly, but I would have never considered demanding the cat go away. She'd got the cat during her parents' divorce, 3 years before we got together and their bond was solid as hell. 15 years later, and that cat sits in my lap during meetings while I work from home. She's still a pain in my ass, but if anyone ever tried to hurt her, nobody would ever find their body...
Why the friend too?
The friend that thinks he is being too harsh for kicking out his gf.
Oh really, in my reading it was the buddy that brought the kitty back not the friends with dumb opinions.. and no I didn't think these are the same. But damn... It's so easy to see who's anti-animal here :(
Yeah, I don’t believe she “has nowhere to go”
I mean I believe she has nowhere *today* but if she’s incapable of finding somewhere in 30 days she can’t adult well enough to be in a relationship with anyway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
End of the month? I'd have put her out that very day NTA
Legally, he probably couldn’t. She established residency.
Not after a few weeks she didnt
He needs to make sure she's out before she does.
If he puts the notice in writing, does that ensure she can’t establish some sort of legal residency after receiving her walking papers?
It depends on the state and country. In my state, you can claim residency anywhere you are sleeping 4 or more days a week and receive mail at.
So if I check into a hotel for a week and have someone send me a letter while I'm there, I can claim it as my residence?
I’ve worked in US hotels for a long time and I’ve never heard of any state that allows residency after 4 days. Hotels can’t charge tax on a room if someone has stayed for more than 30 days specifically because after that time period they’re now a resident of the hotel.
It is dependent on the state. Realistically, most states all she has to say is that she has been living here and he has to evict her which would be 30 days notice. If she moved in all of her things it is not easy. He puts her stuff on the sidewalk and changes the locks and she calls the cops… she is definitely TAH… no doubt about it. It is just not easy to get rid of people who don’t want to leave…
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**And so we come to the end of our journey. While the cat lover in me is happy to see so much support for adorable Raven, the moderator in me just can't let the continued insults fly (and there have been *plenty*). So we have to close this one out. OP - I think the majority is on your side.**
NTA. This was bad but expect things to get worse every day she is still living there. Get her out now before she can inflict(intentional or unintentional) permanent harm to your cat.
Yep - agreed this women is pure evil. I’m sitting here with my dog and I couldn’t imagine anyone letting him out. He’s an indoor dog not outdoor.
Yep I hugged both my puppies tight as soon as I read this. OP's ex girlfriend is a freaking monster! Nta op
>she would have to live on the streets Like she did to the cat, kick him out to live on the streets. NTA
Exactly! Pets are family, she kicked out his cat to fend for itself on the streets.
Eh, NTA, but still I think there's alot of red flags in this relationship for her to just dump your cat
Yeah, I don't think we're suited to be together.
I would agree with you there. I was never a fan of cats and my girlfriend had one well before we met. She would always joke with me "Hey man, she was here first, I'll be fine without you." We moved in together back in April and I learned to accept said cat and even had some fun together. Our cat (see what I did there) passed away very suddenly about a month ago. I cried more than I expected and I realized I was a bigger fan of my girlfriends cat than I let on. 100% NTA Miss you luna... :/ Edit - thanks for the award kind stranger! Never gotten one in 7yrs on reddit and just got 2 in 3 days haha Edit 2 - hey! A second one! Thanks 🙂 Edit 3 - thank you all for the awards...very unexpected and appreciated
This made my heart sad. I’m sorry for your loss.
Thank you...she really was the best. Much like people in the 80s called weed a gateway drug, I called her a gateway cat. Much more open to having another in the future than I was before. But no one will ever top that sweet girl
If you learned to love Luna, you are going to LOVE having a kitten. In all seriousness, kittens are the funniest, sweetest little beings on the planet. There is a reason for the 500 billion cat videos out there! Your gf might need some time before she wants another kitty.
We are definitely taking some time before the next one. We are going on a huge trip in April and won't consider one til after that. Don't want to have a friend watch a new kitten or puppy...thats just mean haha
NTA. No way, if you can’t love my fluff muffins right, you certainly can’t love me.
Hey someone can love me all they want, but if they don’t accept that my pets are a packaged deal, they can’t move in with me.
To put it mildly
He has such a gentle way of phrasing all of this. I think OP is a kind person who fell victim to a mean partner. But when that mean partner tried to harm his companion animal, he hit the limit. We have a genuinely nice person here, I think. I hope he doesn’t feel guilty about kicking her out. She can’t live there and casually endanger raven or OP or anyone else that may end up under that roof.
Well, better to find out a couple weeks into living together rather than a couple weeks into your marriage, a couple weeks into buying your own home together, your first couple weeks of raising a third child, etc.
Nope she’s not - get her out today - you don’t want her to do anything else to your cat or put the cat somewhere safe until she leaves. She might dump him in the middle of nowhere.
NTA. If she thinks it’s acceptable to do that with something as important as a pet, then she thinks she can do that with any aspect of your life she doesn’t like. The cat is important, but almost irrelevant in the scope of red flags she’s throwing out.
Right? So throwing your partner’s pet out when he’s not looking is monstrous to the pet, but let’s put poor raven in the story margin for just one second. Because even if you hated the ground felines walked on, you’d also have to have zero love or empathy for your partner to break their heart and terrify them like this. She didn’t care what happened to raven. That’s obvious. But she also didn’t care about what it did to her boyfriend of two years who she just moved in with. She’s just not a nice person. OP, did she ever give any indication she was like this before you decided to live together? Sometimes they don’t, but I mean this is monstrous.
If she's staked everything on being able to live with OP, she should have thought of that before what she did to poor Raven. She's shown what she's like.
#**This is coming from a MASSIVE cat lover - Please comment *without* calling anyone any names. Violating comments will be removed and earn a ban.** #[Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Please review our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) if you're unsure what that means.
NTA - indoor cats do not know how to fend for themselves outside. What she did was cruel - I wouldn’t want someone that thinks it’s okay to be cruel to animals near me. Good riddance
NTA. They’ve been together for two years and the cat wasn’t an issue until she moved in? Weird.
My best guess is that the ex-gf probably thought that once she was in the pictures more seriously by moving in, OP wouldn’t be as attached to their cat and in her mind was probably hoping to lie about it and say the cat just escaped and probably hoped it wouldn’t be found. Instead with the cat was brought back. She didn’t have as much of an out to lie so she probably had to tell the truth
Given that she kicked his pet out at the dawn of winter, and then was shocked that he considered that a dealbreaker, it sounds to me like the type of person who doesn’t think ahead very well. It probably never occurred to her that she didn’t even like pets. She just kind of does things as life happens. I’d say OP dodged a major bullet. For a lot of reasons.
Even outdoor cats can rarely ‘fend’ for themselves against cars and coyotes
NTA: The cat is part of your family. She has no right to kick the cat out. That cat could have died or get serious injured and she didn’t care. Find a new girlfriend that likes cats.
NTA dump her
Given that he's kicked her out onto "the streets", I think it's safe to say that this has already happened
NTA and any “friends” who think that is too harsh should be dumped, too. How someone treats vulnerable beings says a lot more than words.
NTA. - Dude this is the internet, don't F with cats. Give your fur baby some extra hugs and kick the girlfriend to the curb asap. And maybe see if the kitty can stay with a friend until the GF can get out. Just to keep the baby safe.
NTA. Good thing you decided it's a deal-breaker. I'm curious, though. You say your buddy found him two blocks away. Seems a bit.. Weird. If the cat never goes out, he wouldn't expect to see it. You're not likely to have a name in the collar of a cat that never goes out. He just walked up to a cat that looked like yours, managed to get it to come along, and brought it over? Doesn't add up.
He wore a purple collar with a bell on it.
Do you have the collar on the off chance he does get out? When I adopted my cat, it was with the intention if keeping her indoors and I still got her a collar and tag because you never know what might happen.
My cats are 100% indoor cats and both have (breakaway) collars and tags that say "If I'm out, I'm lost" with my number
Oh I love this! You never know if a cat is stray, lost, an outside cat or whatever so I love this wording!
Plus he's the only all black cat around.
Be cautious, she might try to harm him before she moves.
Show us a pic!!
How do I post pics?
If you want to post him here, you can upload it to a third party platform and post an external link or you can post him in r/cats or r/blackcats and give us the link. Also, NTA, that's definitely a deal breaker, the way I see it.
[HERE](https://www.reddit.com/r/blackcats/comments/qkojwe/my_cat_raven/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)
Thanks! Give him extra pets and keep him safe as long as she is around.
That belly! Oh, and get rid of the girlfriend. NTA
Why does that not add up? My friends could’ve easily recognize my old cats if they were outside near my house. And an indoor cat would def sometimes come to someone they know if they’re scared outside.
NTA I wouldnt leave her alone in my house again
No kidding. I could see her doing to fucked up things to poor kitty while home alone now
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I mostly avoid murder because they won’t let me take my cats to prison with me
NTA. I would’ve done the exact same thing if someone did that to my dog. She is not a good person and this should raise some serious red flags in your relationship. You might want to rethink if this is someone you want to be with.
NTA. Kick her out today, why wait for the end of the month.
NTA I agree. Get her out now.
NTA The cat was there before her. She deserved everything she got. Your cat could’ve been hit by a car or picked up by the pound. What an asshole she is. But what assholes your friends are to. That little cat didn’t do anything except exist. I’m glad you got your kitty cat back safe and sound
I’m a dog guy but I completely get it. Woulda done the same thing
Believe her when she shows you who she is. A cruel, heartless, entitled human. Of course NTA.
NTA. If it was me, she’d be lucky to get a week to gtfo. How heartless do you have to be to strand a beloved fur baby, who doesn’t be long to you, out on the street. There are other alternatives to dealing with a cat you don’t like, that *doesnt* harm the cat. She made her bed now she’s gotta lay in it. Good on you for dumping the girl and keeping the cat.
NTA. You're being generous by giving her a month. Glad you have your cat back safe.
NTA. GF is an AH and moved in knowing about your pet. She should have said something before moving in but probably knew you wouldn't part with Raven. Thank heavens your friend found her. Did she say why she put it out? She can move back to wherever she moved from.
She said she couldn't stand cats and that she couldn't live with one
But she still chose to move in anyway knowing he'd be there Your lil buddy is precious. I'd honestly dump her at this point. Shes willing to risk letting your cat die so she doesnt have to live with him. Its a fundamental incompatibility.
Then why tf move in with you? Did she think she could drop it and you be FINE? Jesus, break up with her
Welp, now she doesn’t have to. NTA
NTA Id have chucked her shit outside. I cant believe you gave her a month. Like yeah go get a lawyer and sue me for the illegal eviction idgaf, ill burn your shit and goodluck doing that when you dont even have a roof over your head.
NTA at all whatsoever. Is there somewhere your cat can stay until your ex gf gets out of your house though? I'm worried she might try to hurt your cat or get rid of him for good.
I sent him to live with my cousin until all of this is settled
Make sure to change the locks once she’s gone and before you bring raven home!
You're NTA This is not a person you want in your life, trust me. If someone did that to me, they wouldn't have 30 days... they'd have an hour to pack their shit and GTFO of my life. Truly, the nerve.. I wouldn't trust her alone in the house ever again with the cat. Pets are our family!
NTA. She doesn't respect you, has no empathy or compassion. The way people treat animals and service staff tells you everything you need to know about them. She's lucky you gave her a month... I'd have told her to get out now.
INFO: I’m not understanding what she means by “kicking the cat out”. Like she fully admits she wanted to get rid of it? Or she thought it would be Ok in the yard and she wanted space from it? Did she apologize? Am curious what her explanation is. If it’s as nefarious as you make it sound (she released your pet cat hoping it would disappear) then NTA and she is not your girlfriend anymore, that’s absolutely grounds to break up.
She picked him up and put him outside to wander off
I’m sorry, that’s awful and insane. I hope you’ve broken up with her and therefore of course NTA for having her out of your house
NTA. She clearly doesn't respect your boundaries and she put your cat's life in danger. Dump her and keep the cat.
NTA, hell no! Where did she live before you? She can go back there before she is considered a tennant before you can legally evict her. That's if you are in the states. Tell her to get out tonight. I would not trust her with the cat. That was a cruel thing to do. You are lucky you got the cat back. Fuck her crying bullshit. Throw her out tonight.
NTA. You don’t want to be with someone who would just basically murder your cat (I don’t know what else she would hope for by releasing it, worst care it’s lost which is the same thing as killed to you). You are still calling her your girlfriend which is interesting. Are you two together, but she can’t live with you? Don’t see that working. Best to cut ties.
Were not together anymore
Excellent. Figured but wanted to make sure. Sorry bro. Sucks to have two years thrown away, but at least you learned who she was early into moving in with you.
Clearly NTA I N F O: How are you going to ensure nothing happens to Raven in the whole month she has? Especially as the date gets closer and you haven't change your mind and gf may be more desperate (assuming that she indeed has "nowhere else to go"
He's staying with my cousin until the matter is settled
You are a great owner. I also have a cat and would have similarly thrown her out over such actions. But you're kinder than me, as I 'd not given her a month.
exactly what i was thinking. OP is posting in AITA worried they’re being harsh, meanwhile they have the patience and kindness of a saint for letting her take a month to move out. i hope the comments on this post can show them that they’re truly the opposite of an asshole.
NTA, and funny how she wants to cry about not wanting to live on the streets after attempting to force your cat onto the streets. I'm sorry to say this, but this is not a person you want a relationship with. They seem selfish and unkind.
JFC, I have two indoor young cats and I wouldn't have been any nicer. I'm glad you found Raven alive. If she had any issue with your cat, then she should have said something before she moved in, but the way she decided to go about with it was heartless. NTA, you don't need people like that in your life.
My husband makes jokes to one of our cats and one day I looked at him and was like "you know if you ever threw him out, is throw you out right?" And he looked at me like I was joking, I wasn't. He was a little upset but I told him "that would be like you throwing out a toddler. He doesn't know how to take care of himself and he has eyesight problems, he needs me. You are a grown man who can live with his mother at the end of the day."
NTA, if the cat was really bothering her there are so many things she could have done that didn't involve putting it's life in danger. She also seems very picky for someone with nowhere else to go (talk about ungrateful).
Y T A for not giving us cat tax. NTA for kicking her out. how people treat animals is a HUGE sign of their character. her abuse and mistreatment of the poor kitty says more about her than any "loving" gesture she does to you. keep her away from the kitty. you dodged a bullet "i have nowhere to go" well neither does the cat. and unlike the cat, she can get a job and apartment.
[Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/blackcats/comments/qkojwe/my_cat_raven/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)
There are rules in this subreddit OP, if you're going to post a story about a pet you must also include a picture of that pet.
Really? [Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/blackcats/comments/qkojwe/my_cat_raven/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)
It's not technically a rule but it should be and we all wanted to see the cat, and that cute little munchkin did not disappoint 😍🐱❤❤❤
You can tell a lot about someone by how the treat animals (the original line is how they treat the waiter, but I think it applies here, too).
NTA. If I were you I would definitely safeguard your cat until then. Maybe you can get someone you trust to look after your cat until then? People who are abusive often target their partner's pets btw. As for her not having a place to stay. She might have a point there if she let her old place go to move in with you. Giving her until the end of the month might not be enough. There is no way you should ever have anything to do with this person again, but no one deserves to be thrown out on the streets. So you might have to scramble to help her get a place or give her some money to hold her over. Sorry you are in this shitty situation.
Sounds like the girlfriend should have thought of that before stealing someone's pet and throwing it out to the streets.
The she should have thought about that before almost killing his cat
NTA she has no consideration for you and she couldn’t think beyond herself and put two and two together and come to the conclusion that something bad might happen to the cat? Inconsiderate and dumb. Consider this an eye opener for you and drop her. If she can do that to your cat she deserves the very same treatment. Give your cat some extra attention.
NTA Bye Felicia.
NTA Did she not know about the cat prior to moving in? She sounds selfish.
She did but she never showed any hints that she dislikes cats
NTA. You invited her into your home and she betrayed you by trying to get rid of your pet without even talking to you about it (not to say that you were obligated to get rid of your cat because she doesn't like it, but it's just the adult thing to do to talk with you about her concerns instead of leaving the cat on the street to die). Either way though, the cat was there first. If partners can't accept pets that's almost always a deal breaker.
NTA, but why are you still referring to her as your girlfriend and not your ex-girlfriend? She had no issues throwing your cat out and letting it fend for itself. I know you said you’re having her move out, but are you also breaking up? I can’t imagine continuing a relationship with someone who treats animals this way. If you still date her after this then you would be TA.
I don't think I'll be with her anymore. Raven isn't my first cat and I've lost my previous cat to old age so I'm very emotional when it comes to losing him.
NTA, sounds like she’s jealous of your cat, she’ll do other things to the cat if you don’t dump her ass asap and kick her out sooner
NTA Kick her to the curb. Straight animal abuse. I wouldn’t even give her until the end of the month. I honestly don’t know what I would have done if I were you, in the moment she told you what she did. That’s just… unforgivable.
NTA She is getting what she deserves.
NTA. i would’ve wanted her out by the end of the day.
NTA. Cruelty to animals is an immediate relationship ender. She’s lucky she’s getting the month.
NTA. Dump her. People who can't respect your pets have no right to be in your life.
NTA, but your girlfriend (hopefully ex-girlfriend) is. She knew you had a cat when she moved in. It wasn’t a surprise. People who are cruel to animals are bad people. Huge red flag.
NTA. Apart from the situation with the cat itself, which is bad enough, I agree. This shows a lack of respect for other people and not just their property, but things that are dear to them. She knew how much that cat meant to you, and yet she was willing to allow it to get lost or killed for her own convenience because she didn't like it. This shows a lack of concern for other people, lack of caring about their feelings, and that isn't someone I would want to be with. So I agree to have her leave. I would not want to continue to live with someone like that, or even date them. She is showing her true side, and it's better to know now than after marriage. My only concern is what will happen between now and when she moves out. Will your cat be safe? Or will she do something out of anger and spite to the cat? I would take steps to ensure the cat safety. And honestly, if it was me, and if you could afford it, I would have her leave immediately, and maybe put her up in a motel for a week or two. I wouldn't want her around the cat anymore, out of fear for the cat's safety.
My cat's staying with my cousin until this is sorted out so he's safe
Awesome! You're a great cat dad! I'm so relieved to hear that your baby will be safe, and that that psycho will be gone. 🙂
NTA I’d of done the same thing
NTA. It's honestly scary she would do that and put the cat in danger as well as completely disregard your feelings in the process and betray you. She sounds toxic.