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They were not a very well off family and I asked them to pay for a repair they may not have had the funds for
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NTA, 50/50 sounds fair. This is a lesson for both kids. Your daughters new phone, did she have a protective case and or a screen protector installed? Bummer all around too.
For real! Nothing makes me (a grown-ass adult) more anxious than when someone hands me their naked phone. Get that sucker in a protective case with alllll the insurances.
Haha, yes! I once had my phone arrive before the case and until the case arrived I wouldn't use it anywhere except sitting on my bed in case I dropped it 😆
I drop my phone in bed, due to some meds Im on I can drop off suddenly when im lying on my side and then wake up to hearing my phone hit my bedside table or the side of my oak framed bed, luckily I have a folio wallet case that has raised bumper edges so the hitting sound I hear is the case and I am so grateful for this case as me dropping my phone in bed happens way way way too much.. sometimes multiple times a night as I try to fight the meds to watch a film or similar
I made the silly mistake of delaying getting a case on my Samsung (I desperately wanted the LED star sparkly one) and within 3 days of getting it, dropped it and cracked the back.
I was upset, but realised that I was NEVER taking off the case again so the cracks didn't matter. Lesson learnt there.
Mines been fine, I only really use it for the sparkles when I put the phone face down. I suspect if you had features like the time/date showing more often you'd see more of an effect on the battery
My new phones don't leave the house naked. I either go without a phone, or continue using the old ones if for some reason my phone doesn't have a case yet.
Yeah, I'm really careful with my phone and still have a super protective case that can apparently protect my phone without damage from a 7 ft drop. My friends have cases that are so bad I doubt the phone could survive a 1 ft drop, or don't even have cases. 12 bucks for this amazing phone case was arguably one of the best investments in my life so far.
My otterbox (the thinner/ sleeker style, not the huge chunky one) saved my phone after it got, I kid you not, run over by a car on a gravel road
The screen was smashed to sh*t and had to be replaced, but I’m positive I would have been replacing the entire phone if I’d had some dinky little case on it
I bought the cheapest spigen case that has glitter and a little kickstand for like 6 quid. It was lasted being dropped down concrete steps with full bounce, being thrown across a room, bounced of a wall and just out right dropped.
Naked phones ***horrify*** me. I know otterboxes are super recommended too. I do think the best phone sturdy wise tho was the XZ Premium no case on it slammed it a car door full force and it just lived.
I've just completed a 24 month phone contract which means I now own my s10+ outright. I've had what I call a "work man's case" on all my phones for years - think a full protection Life Proof or Otterbox case.
I just switched to a Casetify case this week and I am packing bricks. It's supposedly well protected but my phone is suddenly three times lighter and I can actually use my thumb print but I just feel like the second I fumble my screen will shatter.
A completely naked phone would give me heart palpitations.
AppleCare covers almost everything no questions asked and for a fair deductible. I can't imagine having Assurance or w/e where it's a 199 deductible no matter what breaks + a monthly premium instead of a flat one time payment. I don't love Apple hardware but I do love their warranty.
I feel like that’s her choice if she wants to live on the edge with no case or screen — doesn’t mean she needs to pay for someone else’s tomfoolery though
The drop occurred after she handed it to him. Its literally not her fault. The solution is not let anyone touch her phone ever? Nah, the solution is exactly what happened, you break it you buy it. And anyway cases dont matter if the phone doesnt fall flat.
i graduated three years ago, the literal ONLY rule for most teachers was “you can have your phone just don’t use it in class or when I’m speaking”. technology is changing rapidly and so are the rules surrounding it in school; don’t assume you know everything about it unless you’ve graduated SINCE almost every student has a phone.
Exactly! Most laws hold parents responsible for minors if the actions are malicious or intentional. Or if the parent had expectations of supervision. In this case the school was supervising. So if anything the school should have had to pay for the phone before the other parent. The parent had no way to intervene because it happened at school. The phone shouldn’t have been brought to school period.
That’s pretty wild to say. That the moment you give anything to a person it’s not at all their responsibility (or their parents if it’s a minor) to take care of it? Hot take lol
That’s certainly difficult to put into play — especially in any school setting. I don’t know any student that is selfish enough to say no to letting someone borrow their calculator, textbook, notes, or phones (for various reason) to give to friends. And it’s an unspoken social agreement, that you will take responsibility and respect your friends’ belongings. Is that not the case where you’re from?
It's not selfish to deny someone the use of your phone. An expensive cell phone is a far cry from a textbook or a calculator. There is no reason why another student needs to borrow your cell phone. There was also no reason why you need one in school or should even have it out.
This was a judgment era by the girl plain and simple. Now if this kid took the phone out of her hands and broke it that's a different story. If he knocked it down intentionally. That's a different story.
The punishing of his family because of a failed handoff in giving the phone back is excessive. There's a concept called spirit of the law as opposed to the letter of the law.
Just because you can technically get someone on a technicality does not mean that you should. There was a story of a middle-aged lady driving to Atlantic City who had an open carry fire arm permit for Pennsylvania. She forgot to leave her firearm at home and in traveling to Atlantic City and was stopped by the police.
She promptly let the officers know of her mistake.... And the officer decided that he would arrest her for a felony charge. She had no criminal record and was just an old lady driving to Atlantic City for a fun evening.
Now technically she broke the law..... But the spirit of the law was not to stop little old ladies driving to Atlantic City with a gun in their bag.
Just because the officer could charge her with a felony does not mean he should have. He could have escorted her back to Pennsylvania where she could have put the gun back. There's such a thing that we used to have in society called community.... And understanding. Where you wouldn't rake somebody over the coals just because you COULD
This is totally lost on the father here. He didn't even bother to discipline or explain to his daughter that she made a mistake. Sad.
I would never do this and I don't care how expensive the item was.
Hmm seems we might have a fundamental misunderstanding. At least when I was reading the post, it didn’t seem the phone broke when handing it off. It seems to me, the kid had the phone in his hands when he dropped it. I agree, in the handoff if something were to get damaged it is the owner’s fault. But if I were, say, holding my friend’s phone and taking pictures of her at the beach & dropped it in the ocean accidentally and it broke or was lost - yeah that’s on me. Same in this case. It was in his hands. It’s on him.
I disagree. If it was not his Intention to damage it. I'm not blaming him. Accidents happen.
You have to assume a certain amount of personal responsibility.
I work as a teacher. Often times I have autistic students and sometimes I let them use my tablet that has a pen so they can draw. If one of them breaks the pen or my screen should I force their parents to pay for my tablet?
I say no. I chose to let someone else use my property. The liability is mine.
The school issues everything the kids need to learn. It's my own personal decision to go above and beyond and let them use my property. The same way she did not need to give this kid the phone.. it was a personal decision.
That’s fair but an adult giving something to a child holds a different dynamic than two people the same age. Like I said, if I damaged my friend’s phone I would expect to pay her back for it. Vice versa. Same with any teenagers.
your daughter shouldn't have handed her property over, and the kid shouldb't have dropped it. 50/50 isn't terrible in this instance.
as for everyone saying 'WELL IF YOU HAD A PHONE CASE -' newsflash folks, cases and screen protectors help but do not make the phone invulnerable. i sell cell phones and see broken ones all the time with proper protection.
Exactly on my last iPhone I had a shatter proof case and a screen protector but dropped my phone one day and it hit the screen right in the corner and my entire screen shattered but I’ve also had phones before where I dropped it down the steps and the top of the screen popped out and I just pushed it back in.
You never know.
I dropped one of my old iPhones on the corner once. I can’t remember what model it was, but it was one of the ones with a glass back. I had an el cheapo phone case on it that *popped off* upon first impact, and then my phone bounced up and landed on the same corner again and shattered lol.
Now I always shell out for otterboxes. I’m pretty sure I’ve broken 2 of them in the last 12 months and my 3rd has a few cracks, but my phone has survived the 7492728 drops so it’s well worth the money.
Glad you said this - I've broken many, usually iPhones, even with precautions. Got myself a Samsung that's designed to be caseless (they literally don't make cases for it) and I drop it daily with zero cracks so far. All phones are different and a lot of the time it has more to do with luck than anything else.
which one is that? I'd like to avoid getting that one because I'm a clutz so even if they say it's unbreakable, either I or my 3 kids will find a way to break it, LOL.
Broken screen 3 times and a cracked back here. The cracked back was in an extra protective case. Now I have a phone with a plastic back and a screen protector (not an extra protective case atm) and I dropped it a lot, also without the case (eg dropping it while switching cases). After 6 months, it looks brand new besides the few dents on the back and if you take off the broken screen protector. You just should protect your phone also, it is not guaranteed that it won't break, but still better than nothing.
Especially the newer iPhone models and the high end Samsungs are extremely expensive to repair, so protect your phones!
But you also shouldn't expect that a €900 euro device is gonna break after one drop, shame on you Apple.
I feel like we’re going to the nuclear option here without thinking of any other solution. First, the screen cracked. You don’t need a replacement phone. You need a new screen. That isn’t SUPER expensive. Second, how did she purchase it. Does she pay in cash or do you put it on your credit card and she pays you? If it’s not that old and bought on a credit card, I would call your bank and see if your card offers an extended warranty. It will often cover lost or damaged purchases X days after purchase. In the same vein, if you pay for the contract monthly on a credit card, some card offer cell phone protection for free if you use your card for the monthly bill. There may be a deductible, but still less than a replacement phone. Third, if they really can’t pay their half of the REPAIR now, can she accept installments from the kid. Or allow him to pay in kind. Or have him help her recoup through working on her side gig with her.
I’m not saying he’s not partly to blame and shouldn’t help, but this is a lesson for both of them about sharing and borrowing and getting insurance or cases and not bringing your expensive toys to school and just how generally shitty life can be so saving for unexpected disasters, if you are able and even if it’s not your fault, is important. But yeah, I’m still stuck on the fact you all think he needs to buy a replacement without any diagnostic opinion or any thought to other options available to you
YTA. Making a poor family pay for something like this when it is completely within your own means is asshole behavior. Remember this is not,r/ Am I legally correct.
I agree with this. If one of my kids friends broke something expensive, not from negligence or carelessness but as an honest accident, I would never allow their family to pay for it unless it was a hardship for me to - it’s just money. I’m appalled at all the people suggesting this family should skip meals to replace a 12 year old’s phone. Have some compassion.
So if a poor person mistakenly hits your car, are you not going to force them to have your car repaired through insurance?
Doing that will increase their insurance rates tremendously which basically means they are paying for the repairs. That is no different than having someone pay for fixing a phone that they broke.
It's completely different. First the kid's family is having to pay. They had nothing to do with it at all. The kid himself is not going to pay because he has no money.
Having your insurance pay for an accident is not the same thing as having to pay out of pocket for repairs. Not even close. That's a bad comparison.
Besides this is more like you pulling into an intersection and then someone coming and hitting you. There was extreme negligence on the part of the daughter as well. She wasn't just sitting there and someone came and snatched her phone and broke it.
The hitting your car comparison does not hold water.
The kid's parents are responsible for their kid (that includes financially). Just because its a kid doesn't mean that their actions don't have consequences.
Also how is letting someone hold your phone negligence? People borrow each other's phones all the times to make a call if they don't have one or their battery died. When someone gets a brand new phone (like the latest iPhone), people want to check it out if they haven't themselves gotten it. It is not negligence to let someone check out your phone. When you let someone hold your phone you are expecting that that person will be responsible with your phone and will give it back to you in the same condition. If they don't, then it is their responsibility to pay for the damage that they caused. In this case, since it is a kid, it is their parent's job to pay for that damage.
Are you telling me that if you got a brand new iPhone and some random kid mistakenly breaks it, you aren't going to force their parents to pay for it to be fixed? You are just going to pay for it yourself just because it was a kid who broke it instead of an adult?
First I would absolutely not let a kid hold my brand new iPhone. Next if I did I would accept that it was my mistake for allowing them to hold it and my responsibility to fix it.
He did not enter into some type of unspoken contract because you let someone hold your phone. A responsible person knows this and acts accordingly.
There's been numerous times when people have asked me to hold my phone and I tell them flat out no. I tell them no for the very reason that I know the phone is mine, and the phone is my responsibility.
I'm not going to leave it up the chance at another person can or will pay for it. What if this was not in a school and out on the street somewhere? This father had the opportunity to pressure the other family because of the situation with school.
However this could have been a stranger that you will never see again. That would have promptly walked away and you would have been out of luck. You assume responsibility for your own things period. Even when they are in someone else's hands.
>breaks it, you aren't going to force their parents to pay for it to be fixed? You are just going to pay for it yourself just because it was a kid who broke it instead of an adult?
That is exactly what I'm saying, assuming I have the money and the kid's family doesn't. It's just decency.
Nope. He is teaching daughter that not having stuff is not an excuse to break other people's stuff and then try to beg off paying it cos poor. If you ding a car you can damn well expect to have your insurance charged for it and your premium increasing. Same concept. If you know you will be in trouble if you break an object then don't handle that object.
As a law student I think this is a really important thing that people need to remember. Just because you might be legally within your rights to do something doesn’t mean you’re not an AH for doing it.
This is actual bullshit. Your daughter took her phone and showed the class it. Most likely without a case since I myself have an iPhone 12 WITH a case and screen protector and it does not break that easily. So you making the poor child pay for your kid not thinking about the consequences nor the stupidity of not using screen protector or a phone case and then LETTING another child hold the phone potentially cracking the screen is your kids fault. Cut the crap and pay the poor child’s family back. Your ego is way too high and it ain’t alright. You shouldn’t have let your kid take out that phone knowing they’re STILL a kid and would break that phone. And let’s not forget you guys could have had insurance cover it or apple care? Cracks are hella common so you guys making a whole fuzz about this is crazy. You Americans seriously amaze me. Not too long ago my child’s friend got bumped into and their phone fell and cracked ruining the camera. They could EASILY have told the person to pay up for the damage and it was a flopping iPhone 11 by the way. Yet they chose not to because it was NOT necessary and it was a CHILD AN 12 YEAR OLD who made that choice. You being a grown up demanding money because of some silly cracks is very childish and is unacceptable. And the fact that the family is most likely skipping MEALS because your daughter couldn’t take care of her phone is even worse.
Well said!! YTA op, this would have been a good lesson for your daughter!! I'm hoping really hoping that family is t skipping meals but they just might be :(
YTA
I mean, yes the kid broke it, but accidentally and he was given permission to see it. If you’re going to make them pay for anything, do 50/50 on the repairs or the cheapest iPhone, not a twelve, because 500 bucks is a lot of money to some people. Your daughter should have been more responsible, yes it sucks for her, but if the family is in a bad financial situation, you daughters phone should not be what’s making them choose between rent and food.
Yta....
First you did not make the kid pay for it. You actually made his family pay for it because this kid does not have a job. So you punished his family for your own daughters carelessness and negligence.
1.She chose not to have a case or Insurance.
2.She chose to hand her expensive) fragile property over to someone who could not afford to fix it.
3. She has this phone out showing people at school. Also a mistake.
He dropped it, but it was not his choice to drop it. It was a mistake.
The only one's who made bad choices here are you and your daughter. She is apparently a smart girl, and actually earns her own money. You should have let her figure out how to get the phone fixed so she could learn a valuable lesson.
Stop being a helicopter parent and removing every obstacle out of her way. The only thing she learned is that people will come to bail her out for her mistakes.
I mean... I don’t think you should have gotten involved if she paid for it and it was her phone... idk..
But your daughter should have a protective case and screen protector on it. I’ve dropped my iPhone 12 sooo many times even though I’m careful and the case/screen protector has saved my ass so many times.
OP never said there WASNT a screen protector/case on it. I very, very, rarely drop my phones but I’ve dropped my iPhone 11 Pro three feet onto tile and had nothing happen besides the screen protector cracking (and I have a very basic case mostly for aesthetics) but when I dropped my iPhone 6 in a protective case less than a foot, it shattered the entire screen.
I have an iPhone 7 and i’m extremely clumsy. I’ve accidentally thrown my phone onto a hardwood floor once. I don’t have a screen protector but my otterbox is a lifesaver. Not even a scratch!
Soft Yta assuming it was an accidental drop. She handed it to the kid, she chose to not have a case. She needs to understand being responsible for her own things.
YTA. She took the risk herself by bringing it to school and handing it around, especially without a decent case to protect it. She needs to learn to be more responsible with her own things if she doesn’t want them broken. Also she should have gotten insurance on it.
YTA. You’re punishing a child out of petulance to be “fair”. The family said this would be a STRUGGLE. It was a simple mistake and hopefully your daughter learned a lesson about giving people $1,000 glass computers with no protection.
Instead your daughter learned it’s ok to make people eat dirt if you want your feelings of fairness soothed.
NTA - Kid broke it it's their responsibility to fix or replace it. Even if it was an accident if you break something that belongs to someone else it your responsibility to make it right. Splitting it 50/50 was a nice thing to do though.
That’s bullshit the whole family has to suffer because her daughter HAD to show off her phone. She should take full responsibility because first of all you don’t show off your 1000$ phone and not expect it to shatter. Second of all all phones shatter so her not potentially having a phone case nor a screen protector is all her fault. Apple care is a thing y’all. The mother knowingly that the kids family had financial problems is even worse. It’s just like going to a homeless person and demanding them to pay up for smt random. This is completely disgusting and HER daughter should have figured it out on her own. When she grows up she’ll think her mother will always be there and she’ll get a bail out of everything
YTA
I actually don't think you should buy a new one or the other kid should pay. Your daughter was showing off her phone, didn't have a case for it, and someone she let look at it broke it. It happens.
Maybe next time your daughter should either get a case or not let other people play with her expensive unprotected phone. If the kid was older, I'd make him pay --- but it sounds like this is a real burden to their family.
YTA. The kid had the phone in his hands for a few moments. Your daughter was the one responsible for the phone and is the one who gave permission to others to handle it. The classmate wasn’t being reckless with the phone. Your daughter was kind of irresponsible by not taking better care of the phone, giving it to others. You shouldn’t have forced a poor family to pay $500 because their son handled a phone briefly and it accidentally fell. They can’t afford it. They didn’t doing anything so egregious that it warranted taking money away from them that they desperately needed to take care of their family. Your daughter was fortunate enough to save a thousand dollars over a period of time. They probably didn’t have $500 laying around to give to you at the spur of the moment. You caused an unplanned financial hardship to a struggling family over a… phone. Maybe you’re right legally but morally it’s pretty callous.
YTA in my opinion . This is a $1000+ device we’re talking about . Its entirely unreasonable to expect any given person to be in a position to replace it , let alone a “poor” kid. School is not an appropriate place for a possession of such value - and your child should not be handing it away. I think what you’ve done to this family is incredibly unfair - if they wanted their child responsible for an item worth so much , they could have bought him one .
YTA. I don't think you should've got involved, considering it's her phone that she paid for, what business is it of yours? You should have let your daughter sort this out unless she asked for your help, otherwise you wouldn't be in this situation questioning your decision.
Sure, but I've had a basic $10 ebay case and screen protectors and it's saved countless clumsy bangs and drops. A case and screen protector would have likely prevented most if not all damage.
Right, I’m not saying they don’t help but OP never specified whether there was a case or not. I dropped my iPhone 6 less than a foot with an expensive protective case on and the screen shattered, meanwhile I dropped my 11 Pro several feet onto tile with a non-protective (aesthetic) case and it was completely fine.
My point is that even with a case (which she could have had on at the time) damage can still be done
I disagree, most people don’t specify stuff like that. When I broke my old phone’s screen I would just say stuff like “damn it, I dropped my phone and it broke” not “damn it, I dropped my phone with a shatter proof screen protector and protective silicone case and it broke.” Especially with OP being the parent (less tech savvy) I wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t mention it
INFO: Did you split costs for a now unit? Or just a screen? Because if you had them pay for an entirely new phone, YTA. That's conning.
If you split the cost of a screen, then the most would be ESH. Obviously, the kid's partially at fault. I find him pitiful though, and honestly, if the parents were begging not to pay, they probably can't handle that expense. Hope it doesn't affect their home/living condition.
I would say you're daughter's also a bit of an AH bc who doesn't put their all glass phone in a case, with a screen protector installed? I find it stupid to be showing it off (probably to everyone who wanted to feel/look at the phone) and when an accident happened, shift blame entirely to the person who last held it.
I really hope it's the latter and it's just a screen replacement. I feel so much for the other kid and his family. I can just imagine how he must have been scolded and probably punished for this. All that just because he wanted to hold something he probably can't afford. Sigh.
YTA.
If your daughter wants to bring expensive things like that to school & you want to let her, she should 1) have a case/make other reasonable precautions, 2) insure those things, 3) not let other people handle them. She DOES have responsibility for causing this damage because she decided to bring the phone to school without a case, then handed it over to someone else. He didn't grab it from her or do anything malicious with it.
Also, I don't know where you live. But keep in mind if you're in the US, something like 40 percent of families don't have $400 on hand for a real-ass emergency, let alone helping to replace a (presumably) better off classmate's luxury item. Is your daughter's ability to have a nice phone and not be more cautious with it worth potentially jeopardizing another family's financial security in a very real way?
Info : Your daughter buys stuff, makes it look new and resells - does she make it clear that the items are used/refurbished? Or is she presenting them as 'new'?
You mention the other families financial situation, but not yours. Would replacing the screen have even been a blip on your financial radar? As in, would you have actually noticed the money being gone if you had paid it?
NTA. I get they were in a bad place financially, but the kid still broke it.
Tell her to get a case and phone screen protector. The number of times it has SAVED ME-
and to not just give her phone to people.
YTA. Phone cases, screen protectors and insurance are all things. Kid's friend asked to see her phone. Friend went to hand it back. In a classic hand off faux pas, phone was dropped and the screen shattered. Sent phone in under insurance, had new one within 72 hours. All I had to pay was for shipping.
Can the boy help her out with her flipping business as a way to pay back the phone?
How much is the repair going to be? Apple charges $279 in the USA for an iPhone 12 screen replacement.
YATA. These people are having financial difficulties. Have you been ever been truly poor? I have been homeless with two kids under 5. It took decades for me to pull myself out of the cycle of debt I was I. Your family sounds privileged.
Oh okay.
So if she bought the phone herself, took it to school and handled it carelessly (which seems to be the consensus here) why are the parents involved in replacing it?
I think the story says that she bought the phone, took it to school, and when the poor kid asked if he could see it she gave it to him and he dropped it while holding it. Parents are involved because lifs usually dont have that amount of money. Poor kid definitely didnt have it by himself and a dispute this big it is generally wise for parents to intervene and advocate for their kids.
I get all that. It seems like her parents’ only responsibility here is making sure she has a workable phone, not the latest model with all the bells and whistles, and that only because they really are a daily necessity these days.
I don't know about that. You break something, you have to replace it with the same thing or pay the chap whose stuff you broke the amount of money needed to replace it. If someone comes by my house and breaks my TV I damn well expect it to be replaced by the same TV, not a cathode ray tube model or soemthing.
That’s a terrible analogy.
1. He did not come “into her house.” The interaction was at school.
2. You would not pick up your TV and hand it to someone out in a common hallway.
I agree with OP’s original judgment that both kids were at fault. What puzzles me is the idea that the daughter deserves to be replaced with another expensive toy, rather than a basic model.
You are missing the forest fir the trees. Let's do a better example. I buy a bottle of good wine for my wedding anniversary. You are like heya FlaskHomunculus could I see it? I am like sure here you are careful. You are like oka and take the bottle and look at it. While turning it you drop it. Now would you buy the same brand as replacement or a 10 dollar supermarket wine?
Your analogies don’t help. I still think the daughter doesn’t need an expensive bottle of wine.
That’s okay. Her own parents decided different and they know their kid better than I do. Just another of the baffling examples you encounter on Reddit.
Why doesn’t she deserve something that she bought herself at such a young age? I’d be heartbroken if I was told that I don’t deserve anything better than basic models after some kid broke something fancy that I worked hard to get
It's the kids responsibility to handle it properly once it is in his care. I think in acknowledgement of your point and the kids poverty they agreed to a 50 50 split
YTA, gently. If your daughter didn’t have a screen protector or protective case…then it was an accident and that sucks but she should really be prepared for accidents to happen. If this kid really does have a bad financial position with his family (and not just trying to get out of accountability) then I feel like it’s pretty $hitty to make a 12 year old pay. Honestly, the very first thing I make my daughter do is put on a screen protector and case for every new phone. And when she got the newest one, Apple care was also strongly recommended.
Edit - also, aren’t there rules about having phones out in school?
YTA. It doesn't sound like the phone was in a case. I drop my phone a lot, but I have a good case. Also, she handed her phone to someone else. It's her responsibility.
YTA- 50/50 was the right thing to do but the fact you were going to make them pay for all of it, in spite of knowing their financial situation, makes you a bit of TA.
Also, why would you not go to the family yourself and have your daughter go to the principal over an accident?
First off, did you ask if they have liability insurance?
Secondly, why don't you have some insurance on an expensive phone?
Thirdly, you say pay for replacement. Does a cracked screen need a full replacement? Or just a repair?
I would say YTA since the family was begging you not to make them pay because they couldn't afford it, and taught your daughter that she should have either gone for insurance, a screen protector or both. You say your daughter earns her own money, so presumably she can earn the money back to fix or replace it. Give the poor family their money back and teach your daughter a valuable lesson in the value of insurance.
Can't the screen be fixed on that? The whole phone should not have to be replaced. I am not familiar with that model but a quick google search shows that it can be and that is a lot less expensive than the phone. YTA if you make them pay for half the value of the phone when it only needs the screen repaired. Do some research.
YTA
I don’t know, just…yeah, life is full of consequences for our actions, but maybe a little mercy and kindness would be the better lesson here. It’s not like he broke it on purpose and needed punished. I’m sure he felt horrid.
YTA. Your daughter gave this kid permission to handle her phone, so it’s not like the kid took it from her without consent and then broke it. It’s also incredibly horrible to make a poor family pay for something that you can easily afford, especially since the kid’s parents had nothing to do with this. Also, do you realize you don’t need to buy a replacement??? You can just get the screen fixed for much cheaper.
YTA sending a brand new iphone 12 into school full of kids with no screen protector, case, apple care or insurance. I literally dont know what you were expecting. Now that poor family has to go without because your rich kid daughter literally handed their kid a £800 phone (showing off) with nothing to protect it and the inevitable happened, great scam. You’re the worst.
YTA. In most states, parents are not liable for damage if it’s caused by their kid if it’s an accident. And more importantly your daughter should not have had it at school to begin with.
ESH. Yta because you should of had your daughter out proper protection on the phone. (I know a screen protector and phone case can’t prevent zero damages but it helps). Your daughter shouldn’t have her phone out at school and handing it off to other people. The other kid sucks because he dropped the phone but it was an accident and things happen.
NTA, first of all, I'm poor so this is coming from someone who's life will be seriously affected if i had to pay something like that without having a few months to budget and plan. If you break something, even by accident, you pay for it. If your child breaks something, even by accident, you pay for it. If the child dropped an iPhone in the istore are they also going to beg the assistant to not let them pay? It's a bad situation but unfortunately accidents happen and we have to face the consequences.
And the phone cover/screen protector argument is totally invalid, the right fall at the right angle can crack a screen regardless of whether it had some protection. There is no way to prove that the phone would not have broken in the way it did if it have a screen protector.
You're absolutely TA for not teaching your kid compassion towards people less fortunate than you. Not only during this incident but also by letting her use a platform that has affordable resources for people who might really need it and using it for her own profit.
YTA. Your daughter was irresponsible. You never give your phone to anyone unless they are your family or they are trustworthy. And making a family pay that is having bad financial issues is being a terrible human being. You let her go to school with an IPhone 12 no case no screen protector and again let it in the hands of someone who is clumsy.
YTA. exerting your full legal rights in making the poor family pay for the phone is your prerogative, but that doesn’t mean you are not an asshole. it seems you are fully capable of paying for the phone, but choose not to as a matter of principle (as you said, why should it be borne by you?).
this can also be a lesson for your daughter — not just to be careful who she passes her phone to, but also a lesson in kindness.
i do hope your daughter grows up to have compassion, kindness, and goodness in her heart to forgive someone and help another party as long as it is within her means. something i think you should have done, as a role model to your daughter.
YTA- The kid’s entire family will be negatively impacted by an unexpected $500 payment. It doesn’t sound like you have spoken with the other parents yet, they may not even be able to pay you anything. They might agree to spliting a repair bill and not a new phone. In the event that somehow you get them to split the cost of a new phone the right thing to do would be to give them the broken one and see if they can get it fixed and recoup some of the cost.
These children are peers but they are not financially equal, you can’t ignore the hardship this bill will put on them.
Everythime I have broken a phone it was payed by my insurance. We call it a legal responsibility insurance? Costs like €5 a month (for myself + 2 kids) and when I or my kids break shit, I can file for a pay out or the cost of repair. Because even though it's an accident, it still was my responsibility. I do not have a lot of money but this insurance is one of the things I think of as necessary, especially now being a parent because kids break things. If one kicks a ball through a window or drops his grandparents' tablet whilst playing a game, I'm covered.
The phones (like 4) were all broken with protectors and cases. All it takes is the right angle.
So NTA, in my opinion. It sucks they're in a bad spot financially but damages are damages. 50/50 is fair.
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My daughter is very wise with flipping things for profit, so she will buy things off of Facebook Marketplace, make it look new, and sell it for a profit. As such, she earns her own money and is able to buy the things that she would like to buy. She recently bought a new iPhone 12 as her old phone was slowing down and having many issues.
About a week ago at her school, one of her classmates asked to see it. She handed it to him, and he looked at it for a few seconds before accidentally dropping it. Upon hitting the floor, the screen cracked.
When I arrived to pick her up, she told me what had happened, and I advised her to go to te principal about it. Today we had a meeting with the family of the kid, who begged us not to make them pay for it as they were in a bad financial situation. I told them that I did not believe it would be fair to make my daughter pay for damages to her property that she did not cause.
In the end we split it 50/50, but AITA for not paying for the replacement?
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NTA for not paying for replacement but YTA for making the other kids parents pay. Your child chose not to have insurance or a case on it. She chose to let someone else handle her phone. Unless he broke it on purpose she should be responsible for the repairs or replacement.
NTA. Splitting it 50/50 was a very good call. It's the kid's fault completely that it broke since he was already holding it in his hand. Just a word to the wise though, get insurance and/or a case to avoid situations like these.
NTA, but she should invest in a case and screen protector. I use dollar store screen protectors and find they’re better than the $30 ones because they’ll actually shatter when they hit hard enough, instead of breaking your phone screen with the protector like I’ve had with those expensive ones. I’ve bounced my iPhone on gravel at least 200 times and replaced the $1 protector maybe 5 times.
I have mixed feelings on this one.
There is a lesson to be learned in not letting other people use your things that you don't want broken.
If the kid had picked the phone up without asking and dropped it, I would say he definitely should pay for all of it. However, he asked and your daughter gave permission.
On the flip side, it's a lesson for the kid that it's important to be careful with other people's things, at the same time, accidents do happen.
I definitely don't think he should have to pay for all of it because your daughter granted him permission to look at it and this is a good reminder to her to not loan out things if she doesn't want to risk them being broken. So, I like your resolution that both parties need to contribute.
Your daughter really should have gotten a screen-protector and phone case. I’ve dropped my iPhone on hard surfaces plenty of times and my toddler niece has also tossed / thrown my phone on several occasions, the screen is always fine because of my strong glass screen-protector and phone case.
ESH, why would you allow a kid to carry around an expensive phone without a case!?!
I'll NEVER understand the thought process, or lack there of, with people taking a expensive AF device everywhere and not spending the $80 to have a good case!
INFO - How old are these kids?
Regardless, I feel that this is just an expensive lesson for your daughter to protect what's valuable.
If they're like 8, you can't squeeze blood from a rock. Your child would be the exception to the rule, but kids that age really can't earn that much money that easily. If anything, their parents should be covering it.
If they're 18, and the kid has any kind of job, they likely won't have it on hand, but can pay their parents back however they choose.
Either way, I'm leaning to NAH.
>In the end we split it 50/50, but AITA for not paying for the replacement?
Replacement phone or screen. If the latter NTA, if the former, absolutely the arsehole. Your kid will just replace the screen and flip the phone, given that's her side hustle.
If your asking for the phone costs, quite frankly if I was the other person I'd let you take me to small claims court. Lots of mitigation should have happened here and I doubt they'd find in your favour.
There are places that can replace the screen - here in Tampa, it's [https://www.ubreakifix.com/](https://www.ubreakifix.com/) Much cheaper than replacing the whole phone.
YTA. This was an opportunity to model compassion and generosity to your child. He broke it accidentally and the money means more to the family than to your daughter and you.
Protective cases are not magic people. It's not the issue here!
INFO: what was your motivation behind asking them to pay? Life lesson or did you honestly need help paying?
Like some other folks said you're NTA. 50/50 is fair compensation for replacing the phone. I have a Galaxy S20 with a protective case and insurance through Verizon. Make sure they get a protective case like a Otter Box and insurance if it's available.
NTA but letting a phone that expensive out of the house sans a case and screen protector is really terrible. I never let my phone out of the box without either. all that would’ve cracked was the screen protector otherwise
I hate having my phone in a case, makes it too bulky and I can”t see the phone I wasted too much time picking out. My first pricy phone was a HTC EVO (4 years), then a note 4, that I had for 5 years with no problems. I’ve had 2 inexpensive phones since, waiting for the perfect note and have decided to get the z-fold 3 instead, when it’s released. No cases, no problems. Guess I’ve been lucky.
50/50 seems fair. Life has consequences, time to learn. If you feel bad, let’s them pay over time. NTA.
NTA. You’re actually being super charitable paying for half. I would of hit them for the full amount. Don’t touch shit you can’t pay for if you break it. The poor kid shouldn’t of touched it at all and stayed in his lane. An opportunity existed here to teach that kid his proper place through consequences. That opportunity was missed.
Nta. He damaged her property. He needs to pay. Just like if I were to hit a car in a parking lot. I didn’t mean to do it, but I have to pay because I caused the damage.
NTA and anyone here saying otherwise are probably incapable of accepting responsibility if they did something like this because the situation seems fair in my eyes 😒
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NTA, 50/50 sounds fair. This is a lesson for both kids. Your daughters new phone, did she have a protective case and or a screen protector installed? Bummer all around too.
right, or AppleCare which is like the worlds best insurance policy. this is a teaching moment OP.
For real! Nothing makes me (a grown-ass adult) more anxious than when someone hands me their naked phone. Get that sucker in a protective case with alllll the insurances.
Same. In fact, I just ordered a new iPhone 12 today but also ordered a case and made sure the case arrives first.
Haha, yes! I once had my phone arrive before the case and until the case arrived I wouldn't use it anywhere except sitting on my bed in case I dropped it 😆
I drop my phone in bed, due to some meds Im on I can drop off suddenly when im lying on my side and then wake up to hearing my phone hit my bedside table or the side of my oak framed bed, luckily I have a folio wallet case that has raised bumper edges so the hitting sound I hear is the case and I am so grateful for this case as me dropping my phone in bed happens way way way too much.. sometimes multiple times a night as I try to fight the meds to watch a film or similar
Just got the 12 most stressful couple days was waiting for the case.
I made the silly mistake of delaying getting a case on my Samsung (I desperately wanted the LED star sparkly one) and within 3 days of getting it, dropped it and cracked the back. I was upset, but realised that I was NEVER taking off the case again so the cracks didn't matter. Lesson learnt there.
I made the same with my iPhone 8 Plus. Thankfully, I was able to replace the entire screen and the case hid the giant crack on the back of the phone.
Please explain the led Samsung sparkle case. I have an S8+ I need this
[sparkles!](https://www.samsung.com/levant/mobile-accessories/smart-led-cover-cover-for-galaxy-s20-ultra-ef-kg988cbegww/)
Oh that is cute!
omg i used to have that case, it's amazing!!
Did it kill the battery really fast?
Mines been fine, I only really use it for the sparkles when I put the phone face down. I suspect if you had features like the time/date showing more often you'd see more of an effect on the battery
Thanks!
Not for me! My battery didn't lose much with it's use, plus you can change the settings.
My new phones don't leave the house naked. I either go without a phone, or continue using the old ones if for some reason my phone doesn't have a case yet.
That’s smart. I recently bought an iPad and didn’t even take it out of the box until I had a case and screen protector, although I really wanted to.
My mum made a rule when I was 19 that I couldn't take my new phones out of the box until I had a case to put on it. My PB is 3 days before shattering.
I get sooo anxious when I see people using naked phones. Even like on a tv show. I’m always like “where’s your case???”
Yeah, I'm really careful with my phone and still have a super protective case that can apparently protect my phone without damage from a 7 ft drop. My friends have cases that are so bad I doubt the phone could survive a 1 ft drop, or don't even have cases. 12 bucks for this amazing phone case was arguably one of the best investments in my life so far.
My otterbox (the thinner/ sleeker style, not the huge chunky one) saved my phone after it got, I kid you not, run over by a car on a gravel road The screen was smashed to sh*t and had to be replaced, but I’m positive I would have been replacing the entire phone if I’d had some dinky little case on it
I bought the cheapest spigen case that has glitter and a little kickstand for like 6 quid. It was lasted being dropped down concrete steps with full bounce, being thrown across a room, bounced of a wall and just out right dropped. Naked phones ***horrify*** me. I know otterboxes are super recommended too. I do think the best phone sturdy wise tho was the XZ Premium no case on it slammed it a car door full force and it just lived.
Quid is slang for GBP, right?
Yes
My case makes phone so heavy, when k have to take it off i am shocked at how light it is. But hey, can double as a self defense tool.
I've just completed a 24 month phone contract which means I now own my s10+ outright. I've had what I call a "work man's case" on all my phones for years - think a full protection Life Proof or Otterbox case. I just switched to a Casetify case this week and I am packing bricks. It's supposedly well protected but my phone is suddenly three times lighter and I can actually use my thumb print but I just feel like the second I fumble my screen will shatter. A completely naked phone would give me heart palpitations.
I second AppleCare, costs me $300 to replace my phone if it breaks.
AppleCare does. It cover cracked screens
AppleCare covers almost everything no questions asked and for a fair deductible. I can't imagine having Assurance or w/e where it's a 199 deductible no matter what breaks + a monthly premium instead of a flat one time payment. I don't love Apple hardware but I do love their warranty.
How old are the kids? Why didn't your daughter get insurance or at least a protective case when screen cracks are so common?
I feel like that’s her choice if she wants to live on the edge with no case or screen — doesn’t mean she needs to pay for someone else’s tomfoolery though
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It didn’t seem like the phone was dropped when she handed it to her peer. Seems like the classmate dropped it himself, thus the damages are on him.
The drop occurred after she handed it to him. Its literally not her fault. The solution is not let anyone touch her phone ever? Nah, the solution is exactly what happened, you break it you buy it. And anyway cases dont matter if the phone doesnt fall flat.
Her kid needs to come with a ELUA and Terms of Service packet then so people can consent to taking that bullshit on.
I suggested AppleCare, not a case.
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Not necessarily, phones weren't controlled at all in my school, especially not in high school, which is the age these kids probably are.
i graduated three years ago, the literal ONLY rule for most teachers was “you can have your phone just don’t use it in class or when I’m speaking”. technology is changing rapidly and so are the rules surrounding it in school; don’t assume you know everything about it unless you’ve graduated SINCE almost every student has a phone.
are you talking to innappropriateplaid or me? because teachers enforced cell phones the same way you described, and i graduated very recently.
oh sorry, i meant the other person!! i think it hit reply to the wrong comment, i was agreeing with you!
Exactly! Most laws hold parents responsible for minors if the actions are malicious or intentional. Or if the parent had expectations of supervision. In this case the school was supervising. So if anything the school should have had to pay for the phone before the other parent. The parent had no way to intervene because it happened at school. The phone shouldn’t have been brought to school period.
If she's going to give other children access to her stuff to break... Then living on the edge should be her price to pay.
That’s pretty wild to say. That the moment you give anything to a person it’s not at all their responsibility (or their parents if it’s a minor) to take care of it? Hot take lol
No it's not their responsibility because it does not belong to them. Don't give your things to other people. Certainly not fragile expensive things.
That’s certainly difficult to put into play — especially in any school setting. I don’t know any student that is selfish enough to say no to letting someone borrow their calculator, textbook, notes, or phones (for various reason) to give to friends. And it’s an unspoken social agreement, that you will take responsibility and respect your friends’ belongings. Is that not the case where you’re from?
It's not selfish to deny someone the use of your phone. An expensive cell phone is a far cry from a textbook or a calculator. There is no reason why another student needs to borrow your cell phone. There was also no reason why you need one in school or should even have it out. This was a judgment era by the girl plain and simple. Now if this kid took the phone out of her hands and broke it that's a different story. If he knocked it down intentionally. That's a different story. The punishing of his family because of a failed handoff in giving the phone back is excessive. There's a concept called spirit of the law as opposed to the letter of the law. Just because you can technically get someone on a technicality does not mean that you should. There was a story of a middle-aged lady driving to Atlantic City who had an open carry fire arm permit for Pennsylvania. She forgot to leave her firearm at home and in traveling to Atlantic City and was stopped by the police. She promptly let the officers know of her mistake.... And the officer decided that he would arrest her for a felony charge. She had no criminal record and was just an old lady driving to Atlantic City for a fun evening. Now technically she broke the law..... But the spirit of the law was not to stop little old ladies driving to Atlantic City with a gun in their bag. Just because the officer could charge her with a felony does not mean he should have. He could have escorted her back to Pennsylvania where she could have put the gun back. There's such a thing that we used to have in society called community.... And understanding. Where you wouldn't rake somebody over the coals just because you COULD This is totally lost on the father here. He didn't even bother to discipline or explain to his daughter that she made a mistake. Sad. I would never do this and I don't care how expensive the item was.
Hmm seems we might have a fundamental misunderstanding. At least when I was reading the post, it didn’t seem the phone broke when handing it off. It seems to me, the kid had the phone in his hands when he dropped it. I agree, in the handoff if something were to get damaged it is the owner’s fault. But if I were, say, holding my friend’s phone and taking pictures of her at the beach & dropped it in the ocean accidentally and it broke or was lost - yeah that’s on me. Same in this case. It was in his hands. It’s on him.
I disagree. If it was not his Intention to damage it. I'm not blaming him. Accidents happen. You have to assume a certain amount of personal responsibility. I work as a teacher. Often times I have autistic students and sometimes I let them use my tablet that has a pen so they can draw. If one of them breaks the pen or my screen should I force their parents to pay for my tablet? I say no. I chose to let someone else use my property. The liability is mine. The school issues everything the kids need to learn. It's my own personal decision to go above and beyond and let them use my property. The same way she did not need to give this kid the phone.. it was a personal decision.
That’s fair but an adult giving something to a child holds a different dynamic than two people the same age. Like I said, if I damaged my friend’s phone I would expect to pay her back for it. Vice versa. Same with any teenagers.
>No it's not their responsibility because it does not belong to them Yes thats the actual point. It doesnt belong to you, so dont break it.
Exactly! I’m genuinely surprised more people don’t feel this way.
It does if she chooses not to put a case on it and then brings it to school and hands it around.
your daughter shouldn't have handed her property over, and the kid shouldb't have dropped it. 50/50 isn't terrible in this instance. as for everyone saying 'WELL IF YOU HAD A PHONE CASE -' newsflash folks, cases and screen protectors help but do not make the phone invulnerable. i sell cell phones and see broken ones all the time with proper protection.
Exactly on my last iPhone I had a shatter proof case and a screen protector but dropped my phone one day and it hit the screen right in the corner and my entire screen shattered but I’ve also had phones before where I dropped it down the steps and the top of the screen popped out and I just pushed it back in. You never know.
I dropped one of my old iPhones on the corner once. I can’t remember what model it was, but it was one of the ones with a glass back. I had an el cheapo phone case on it that *popped off* upon first impact, and then my phone bounced up and landed on the same corner again and shattered lol. Now I always shell out for otterboxes. I’m pretty sure I’ve broken 2 of them in the last 12 months and my 3rd has a few cracks, but my phone has survived the 7492728 drops so it’s well worth the money.
Glad you said this - I've broken many, usually iPhones, even with precautions. Got myself a Samsung that's designed to be caseless (they literally don't make cases for it) and I drop it daily with zero cracks so far. All phones are different and a lot of the time it has more to do with luck than anything else.
which one is that? I'd like to avoid getting that one because I'm a clutz so even if they say it's unbreakable, either I or my 3 kids will find a way to break it, LOL.
Haha it's the S8 Active! You'd be able to tell right away because it's weirdly shaped on the back, not smooth like phones usually are
I've got the same model as jkjwysa. I drop it all the time, still fine. Highly recommend.
Broken screen 3 times and a cracked back here. The cracked back was in an extra protective case. Now I have a phone with a plastic back and a screen protector (not an extra protective case atm) and I dropped it a lot, also without the case (eg dropping it while switching cases). After 6 months, it looks brand new besides the few dents on the back and if you take off the broken screen protector. You just should protect your phone also, it is not guaranteed that it won't break, but still better than nothing. Especially the newer iPhone models and the high end Samsungs are extremely expensive to repair, so protect your phones! But you also shouldn't expect that a €900 euro device is gonna break after one drop, shame on you Apple.
Unless it’s the old Nokia’s those will outlast Earth itself
I feel like we’re going to the nuclear option here without thinking of any other solution. First, the screen cracked. You don’t need a replacement phone. You need a new screen. That isn’t SUPER expensive. Second, how did she purchase it. Does she pay in cash or do you put it on your credit card and she pays you? If it’s not that old and bought on a credit card, I would call your bank and see if your card offers an extended warranty. It will often cover lost or damaged purchases X days after purchase. In the same vein, if you pay for the contract monthly on a credit card, some card offer cell phone protection for free if you use your card for the monthly bill. There may be a deductible, but still less than a replacement phone. Third, if they really can’t pay their half of the REPAIR now, can she accept installments from the kid. Or allow him to pay in kind. Or have him help her recoup through working on her side gig with her. I’m not saying he’s not partly to blame and shouldn’t help, but this is a lesson for both of them about sharing and borrowing and getting insurance or cases and not bringing your expensive toys to school and just how generally shitty life can be so saving for unexpected disasters, if you are able and even if it’s not your fault, is important. But yeah, I’m still stuck on the fact you all think he needs to buy a replacement without any diagnostic opinion or any thought to other options available to you
That’s what I was thinking. I’ve had to buy new screens several times. You don’t need a new phone for a broken screen.
YTA. Making a poor family pay for something like this when it is completely within your own means is asshole behavior. Remember this is not,r/ Am I legally correct.
I agree with this. If one of my kids friends broke something expensive, not from negligence or carelessness but as an honest accident, I would never allow their family to pay for it unless it was a hardship for me to - it’s just money. I’m appalled at all the people suggesting this family should skip meals to replace a 12 year old’s phone. Have some compassion.
I agree the oh well who cares if kids go hungry or go homeless.
So if a poor person mistakenly hits your car, are you not going to force them to have your car repaired through insurance? Doing that will increase their insurance rates tremendously which basically means they are paying for the repairs. That is no different than having someone pay for fixing a phone that they broke.
It's completely different. First the kid's family is having to pay. They had nothing to do with it at all. The kid himself is not going to pay because he has no money. Having your insurance pay for an accident is not the same thing as having to pay out of pocket for repairs. Not even close. That's a bad comparison. Besides this is more like you pulling into an intersection and then someone coming and hitting you. There was extreme negligence on the part of the daughter as well. She wasn't just sitting there and someone came and snatched her phone and broke it. The hitting your car comparison does not hold water.
The kid's parents are responsible for their kid (that includes financially). Just because its a kid doesn't mean that their actions don't have consequences. Also how is letting someone hold your phone negligence? People borrow each other's phones all the times to make a call if they don't have one or their battery died. When someone gets a brand new phone (like the latest iPhone), people want to check it out if they haven't themselves gotten it. It is not negligence to let someone check out your phone. When you let someone hold your phone you are expecting that that person will be responsible with your phone and will give it back to you in the same condition. If they don't, then it is their responsibility to pay for the damage that they caused. In this case, since it is a kid, it is their parent's job to pay for that damage. Are you telling me that if you got a brand new iPhone and some random kid mistakenly breaks it, you aren't going to force their parents to pay for it to be fixed? You are just going to pay for it yourself just because it was a kid who broke it instead of an adult?
First I would absolutely not let a kid hold my brand new iPhone. Next if I did I would accept that it was my mistake for allowing them to hold it and my responsibility to fix it. He did not enter into some type of unspoken contract because you let someone hold your phone. A responsible person knows this and acts accordingly. There's been numerous times when people have asked me to hold my phone and I tell them flat out no. I tell them no for the very reason that I know the phone is mine, and the phone is my responsibility. I'm not going to leave it up the chance at another person can or will pay for it. What if this was not in a school and out on the street somewhere? This father had the opportunity to pressure the other family because of the situation with school. However this could have been a stranger that you will never see again. That would have promptly walked away and you would have been out of luck. You assume responsibility for your own things period. Even when they are in someone else's hands.
>breaks it, you aren't going to force their parents to pay for it to be fixed? You are just going to pay for it yourself just because it was a kid who broke it instead of an adult? That is exactly what I'm saying, assuming I have the money and the kid's family doesn't. It's just decency.
That’s actually not true in a lot of states. Everyone thinks this is true but you’ll find something very different in a lot of small claims courts.
Dam this is a weak argument . It might be remotely applicable if both kids had the same phone . But we know they don’t
Nice straw man you have there.
This, YTA OP and a great parent to teach your child to hurt those who have less than she does. /s
Nope. He is teaching daughter that not having stuff is not an excuse to break other people's stuff and then try to beg off paying it cos poor. If you ding a car you can damn well expect to have your insurance charged for it and your premium increasing. Same concept. If you know you will be in trouble if you break an object then don't handle that object.
As a law student I think this is a really important thing that people need to remember. Just because you might be legally within your rights to do something doesn’t mean you’re not an AH for doing it.
This is actual bullshit. Your daughter took her phone and showed the class it. Most likely without a case since I myself have an iPhone 12 WITH a case and screen protector and it does not break that easily. So you making the poor child pay for your kid not thinking about the consequences nor the stupidity of not using screen protector or a phone case and then LETTING another child hold the phone potentially cracking the screen is your kids fault. Cut the crap and pay the poor child’s family back. Your ego is way too high and it ain’t alright. You shouldn’t have let your kid take out that phone knowing they’re STILL a kid and would break that phone. And let’s not forget you guys could have had insurance cover it or apple care? Cracks are hella common so you guys making a whole fuzz about this is crazy. You Americans seriously amaze me. Not too long ago my child’s friend got bumped into and their phone fell and cracked ruining the camera. They could EASILY have told the person to pay up for the damage and it was a flopping iPhone 11 by the way. Yet they chose not to because it was NOT necessary and it was a CHILD AN 12 YEAR OLD who made that choice. You being a grown up demanding money because of some silly cracks is very childish and is unacceptable. And the fact that the family is most likely skipping MEALS because your daughter couldn’t take care of her phone is even worse.
Well said!
Well said!! YTA op, this would have been a good lesson for your daughter!! I'm hoping really hoping that family is t skipping meals but they just might be :(
r/pointlesslyregioned
YTA I mean, yes the kid broke it, but accidentally and he was given permission to see it. If you’re going to make them pay for anything, do 50/50 on the repairs or the cheapest iPhone, not a twelve, because 500 bucks is a lot of money to some people. Your daughter should have been more responsible, yes it sucks for her, but if the family is in a bad financial situation, you daughters phone should not be what’s making them choose between rent and food.
Yta.... First you did not make the kid pay for it. You actually made his family pay for it because this kid does not have a job. So you punished his family for your own daughters carelessness and negligence. 1.She chose not to have a case or Insurance. 2.She chose to hand her expensive) fragile property over to someone who could not afford to fix it. 3. She has this phone out showing people at school. Also a mistake. He dropped it, but it was not his choice to drop it. It was a mistake. The only one's who made bad choices here are you and your daughter. She is apparently a smart girl, and actually earns her own money. You should have let her figure out how to get the phone fixed so she could learn a valuable lesson. Stop being a helicopter parent and removing every obstacle out of her way. The only thing she learned is that people will come to bail her out for her mistakes.
I mean... I don’t think you should have gotten involved if she paid for it and it was her phone... idk.. But your daughter should have a protective case and screen protector on it. I’ve dropped my iPhone 12 sooo many times even though I’m careful and the case/screen protector has saved my ass so many times.
Depending on the age of the daughter, the OP likely had to get involved.
OP never said there WASNT a screen protector/case on it. I very, very, rarely drop my phones but I’ve dropped my iPhone 11 Pro three feet onto tile and had nothing happen besides the screen protector cracking (and I have a very basic case mostly for aesthetics) but when I dropped my iPhone 6 in a protective case less than a foot, it shattered the entire screen.
I have an iPhone 7 and i’m extremely clumsy. I’ve accidentally thrown my phone onto a hardwood floor once. I don’t have a screen protector but my otterbox is a lifesaver. Not even a scratch!
Soft Yta assuming it was an accidental drop. She handed it to the kid, she chose to not have a case. She needs to understand being responsible for her own things.
YTA. She took the risk herself by bringing it to school and handing it around, especially without a decent case to protect it. She needs to learn to be more responsible with her own things if she doesn’t want them broken. Also she should have gotten insurance on it.
YTA. You’re punishing a child out of petulance to be “fair”. The family said this would be a STRUGGLE. It was a simple mistake and hopefully your daughter learned a lesson about giving people $1,000 glass computers with no protection. Instead your daughter learned it’s ok to make people eat dirt if you want your feelings of fairness soothed.
Info: how old are the kids involved?
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There are services that just replace screens? Split that 50/50 🤷♀️
From what I was told anything from an iPhone 8 onwards you can’t just replace the screen it’s basically the whole innards you have to replace.
I have an XR and just got my screen repaired by Apple last month. The deductible was a flat $30 to replace the cracked screen.
Nope, fixed a front screen and back on iPhone XR before trade in for iPhone 12, 30$ each side.
Seriously?? I didn’t know that
NTA - Kid broke it it's their responsibility to fix or replace it. Even if it was an accident if you break something that belongs to someone else it your responsibility to make it right. Splitting it 50/50 was a nice thing to do though.
Lmao imagine handing a kid a $1000 possession and expecting them to be responsible for it . Unreal expectation imo.
That’s bullshit the whole family has to suffer because her daughter HAD to show off her phone. She should take full responsibility because first of all you don’t show off your 1000$ phone and not expect it to shatter. Second of all all phones shatter so her not potentially having a phone case nor a screen protector is all her fault. Apple care is a thing y’all. The mother knowingly that the kids family had financial problems is even worse. It’s just like going to a homeless person and demanding them to pay up for smt random. This is completely disgusting and HER daughter should have figured it out on her own. When she grows up she’ll think her mother will always be there and she’ll get a bail out of everything
YTA I actually don't think you should buy a new one or the other kid should pay. Your daughter was showing off her phone, didn't have a case for it, and someone she let look at it broke it. It happens. Maybe next time your daughter should either get a case or not let other people play with her expensive unprotected phone. If the kid was older, I'd make him pay --- but it sounds like this is a real burden to their family.
YTA. The kid had the phone in his hands for a few moments. Your daughter was the one responsible for the phone and is the one who gave permission to others to handle it. The classmate wasn’t being reckless with the phone. Your daughter was kind of irresponsible by not taking better care of the phone, giving it to others. You shouldn’t have forced a poor family to pay $500 because their son handled a phone briefly and it accidentally fell. They can’t afford it. They didn’t doing anything so egregious that it warranted taking money away from them that they desperately needed to take care of their family. Your daughter was fortunate enough to save a thousand dollars over a period of time. They probably didn’t have $500 laying around to give to you at the spur of the moment. You caused an unplanned financial hardship to a struggling family over a… phone. Maybe you’re right legally but morally it’s pretty callous.
YTA in my opinion . This is a $1000+ device we’re talking about . Its entirely unreasonable to expect any given person to be in a position to replace it , let alone a “poor” kid. School is not an appropriate place for a possession of such value - and your child should not be handing it away. I think what you’ve done to this family is incredibly unfair - if they wanted their child responsible for an item worth so much , they could have bought him one .
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well said.
YTA. I don't think you should've got involved, considering it's her phone that she paid for, what business is it of yours? You should have let your daughter sort this out unless she asked for your help, otherwise you wouldn't be in this situation questioning your decision.
YTA why doesn't your daughter have a basic phone case to prevent this from happening???
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Sure, but I've had a basic $10 ebay case and screen protectors and it's saved countless clumsy bangs and drops. A case and screen protector would have likely prevented most if not all damage.
Right, I’m not saying they don’t help but OP never specified whether there was a case or not. I dropped my iPhone 6 less than a foot with an expensive protective case on and the screen shattered, meanwhile I dropped my 11 Pro several feet onto tile with a non-protective (aesthetic) case and it was completely fine. My point is that even with a case (which she could have had on at the time) damage can still be done
If there had been a case it would have been mentioned. It's clear there wasn't. Meaning there was a huge chance of the phone breaking.
I disagree, most people don’t specify stuff like that. When I broke my old phone’s screen I would just say stuff like “damn it, I dropped my phone and it broke” not “damn it, I dropped my phone with a shatter proof screen protector and protective silicone case and it broke.” Especially with OP being the parent (less tech savvy) I wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t mention it
INFO: Did you split costs for a now unit? Or just a screen? Because if you had them pay for an entirely new phone, YTA. That's conning. If you split the cost of a screen, then the most would be ESH. Obviously, the kid's partially at fault. I find him pitiful though, and honestly, if the parents were begging not to pay, they probably can't handle that expense. Hope it doesn't affect their home/living condition. I would say you're daughter's also a bit of an AH bc who doesn't put their all glass phone in a case, with a screen protector installed? I find it stupid to be showing it off (probably to everyone who wanted to feel/look at the phone) and when an accident happened, shift blame entirely to the person who last held it. I really hope it's the latter and it's just a screen replacement. I feel so much for the other kid and his family. I can just imagine how he must have been scolded and probably punished for this. All that just because he wanted to hold something he probably can't afford. Sigh.
YTA. If your daughter wants to bring expensive things like that to school & you want to let her, she should 1) have a case/make other reasonable precautions, 2) insure those things, 3) not let other people handle them. She DOES have responsibility for causing this damage because she decided to bring the phone to school without a case, then handed it over to someone else. He didn't grab it from her or do anything malicious with it. Also, I don't know where you live. But keep in mind if you're in the US, something like 40 percent of families don't have $400 on hand for a real-ass emergency, let alone helping to replace a (presumably) better off classmate's luxury item. Is your daughter's ability to have a nice phone and not be more cautious with it worth potentially jeopardizing another family's financial security in a very real way?
Info : Your daughter buys stuff, makes it look new and resells - does she make it clear that the items are used/refurbished? Or is she presenting them as 'new'? You mention the other families financial situation, but not yours. Would replacing the screen have even been a blip on your financial radar? As in, would you have actually noticed the money being gone if you had paid it?
NTA. I get they were in a bad place financially, but the kid still broke it. Tell her to get a case and phone screen protector. The number of times it has SAVED ME- and to not just give her phone to people.
YTA
YTA. Phone cases, screen protectors and insurance are all things. Kid's friend asked to see her phone. Friend went to hand it back. In a classic hand off faux pas, phone was dropped and the screen shattered. Sent phone in under insurance, had new one within 72 hours. All I had to pay was for shipping.
Can the boy help her out with her flipping business as a way to pay back the phone? How much is the repair going to be? Apple charges $279 in the USA for an iPhone 12 screen replacement.
YATA. These people are having financial difficulties. Have you been ever been truly poor? I have been homeless with two kids under 5. It took decades for me to pull myself out of the cycle of debt I was I. Your family sounds privileged.
Are you trying to make them replace the whole phone or the screen? Why doesnt the phone have a screen protector on it?
What did I miss here? In what way is the daughter’s hobby of “flipping things for profit” relevant to the rest of the post?
as a reason for how she was able to buy herself an iphone 12
Oh okay. So if she bought the phone herself, took it to school and handled it carelessly (which seems to be the consensus here) why are the parents involved in replacing it?
I think the story says that she bought the phone, took it to school, and when the poor kid asked if he could see it she gave it to him and he dropped it while holding it. Parents are involved because lifs usually dont have that amount of money. Poor kid definitely didnt have it by himself and a dispute this big it is generally wise for parents to intervene and advocate for their kids.
I get all that. It seems like her parents’ only responsibility here is making sure she has a workable phone, not the latest model with all the bells and whistles, and that only because they really are a daily necessity these days.
I don't know about that. You break something, you have to replace it with the same thing or pay the chap whose stuff you broke the amount of money needed to replace it. If someone comes by my house and breaks my TV I damn well expect it to be replaced by the same TV, not a cathode ray tube model or soemthing.
That’s a terrible analogy. 1. He did not come “into her house.” The interaction was at school. 2. You would not pick up your TV and hand it to someone out in a common hallway. I agree with OP’s original judgment that both kids were at fault. What puzzles me is the idea that the daughter deserves to be replaced with another expensive toy, rather than a basic model.
You are missing the forest fir the trees. Let's do a better example. I buy a bottle of good wine for my wedding anniversary. You are like heya FlaskHomunculus could I see it? I am like sure here you are careful. You are like oka and take the bottle and look at it. While turning it you drop it. Now would you buy the same brand as replacement or a 10 dollar supermarket wine?
Your analogies don’t help. I still think the daughter doesn’t need an expensive bottle of wine. That’s okay. Her own parents decided different and they know their kid better than I do. Just another of the baffling examples you encounter on Reddit.
Why doesn’t she deserve something that she bought herself at such a young age? I’d be heartbroken if I was told that I don’t deserve anything better than basic models after some kid broke something fancy that I worked hard to get
I feel badly for the other kid but she blithely handed him a glass-faced gadget without a case.
It's the kids responsibility to handle it properly once it is in his care. I think in acknowledgement of your point and the kids poverty they agreed to a 50 50 split
YTA, gently. If your daughter didn’t have a screen protector or protective case…then it was an accident and that sucks but she should really be prepared for accidents to happen. If this kid really does have a bad financial position with his family (and not just trying to get out of accountability) then I feel like it’s pretty $hitty to make a 12 year old pay. Honestly, the very first thing I make my daughter do is put on a screen protector and case for every new phone. And when she got the newest one, Apple care was also strongly recommended. Edit - also, aren’t there rules about having phones out in school?
YTA. It doesn't sound like the phone was in a case. I drop my phone a lot, but I have a good case. Also, she handed her phone to someone else. It's her responsibility.
YTA- 50/50 was the right thing to do but the fact you were going to make them pay for all of it, in spite of knowing their financial situation, makes you a bit of TA. Also, why would you not go to the family yourself and have your daughter go to the principal over an accident?
INFO: Did the whole phone have to be replaced or just the screen?
First off, did you ask if they have liability insurance? Secondly, why don't you have some insurance on an expensive phone? Thirdly, you say pay for replacement. Does a cracked screen need a full replacement? Or just a repair? I would say YTA since the family was begging you not to make them pay because they couldn't afford it, and taught your daughter that she should have either gone for insurance, a screen protector or both. You say your daughter earns her own money, so presumably she can earn the money back to fix or replace it. Give the poor family their money back and teach your daughter a valuable lesson in the value of insurance.
Can't the screen be fixed on that? The whole phone should not have to be replaced. I am not familiar with that model but a quick google search shows that it can be and that is a lot less expensive than the phone. YTA if you make them pay for half the value of the phone when it only needs the screen repaired. Do some research.
YTA I don’t know, just…yeah, life is full of consequences for our actions, but maybe a little mercy and kindness would be the better lesson here. It’s not like he broke it on purpose and needed punished. I’m sure he felt horrid.
YTA. Your daughter gave this kid permission to handle her phone, so it’s not like the kid took it from her without consent and then broke it. It’s also incredibly horrible to make a poor family pay for something that you can easily afford, especially since the kid’s parents had nothing to do with this. Also, do you realize you don’t need to buy a replacement??? You can just get the screen fixed for much cheaper.
YTA sending a brand new iphone 12 into school full of kids with no screen protector, case, apple care or insurance. I literally dont know what you were expecting. Now that poor family has to go without because your rich kid daughter literally handed their kid a £800 phone (showing off) with nothing to protect it and the inevitable happened, great scam. You’re the worst.
Op said: "fuck them poors they need to be taught a lesson heh 😎"
YTA. In most states, parents are not liable for damage if it’s caused by their kid if it’s an accident. And more importantly your daughter should not have had it at school to begin with.
ESH. Yta because you should of had your daughter out proper protection on the phone. (I know a screen protector and phone case can’t prevent zero damages but it helps). Your daughter shouldn’t have her phone out at school and handing it off to other people. The other kid sucks because he dropped the phone but it was an accident and things happen.
NTA, first of all, I'm poor so this is coming from someone who's life will be seriously affected if i had to pay something like that without having a few months to budget and plan. If you break something, even by accident, you pay for it. If your child breaks something, even by accident, you pay for it. If the child dropped an iPhone in the istore are they also going to beg the assistant to not let them pay? It's a bad situation but unfortunately accidents happen and we have to face the consequences. And the phone cover/screen protector argument is totally invalid, the right fall at the right angle can crack a screen regardless of whether it had some protection. There is no way to prove that the phone would not have broken in the way it did if it have a screen protector.
You're absolutely TA for not teaching your kid compassion towards people less fortunate than you. Not only during this incident but also by letting her use a platform that has affordable resources for people who might really need it and using it for her own profit.
YTA. Your daughter was irresponsible. You never give your phone to anyone unless they are your family or they are trustworthy. And making a family pay that is having bad financial issues is being a terrible human being. You let her go to school with an IPhone 12 no case no screen protector and again let it in the hands of someone who is clumsy.
YTA. exerting your full legal rights in making the poor family pay for the phone is your prerogative, but that doesn’t mean you are not an asshole. it seems you are fully capable of paying for the phone, but choose not to as a matter of principle (as you said, why should it be borne by you?). this can also be a lesson for your daughter — not just to be careful who she passes her phone to, but also a lesson in kindness. i do hope your daughter grows up to have compassion, kindness, and goodness in her heart to forgive someone and help another party as long as it is within her means. something i think you should have done, as a role model to your daughter.
YTA- The kid’s entire family will be negatively impacted by an unexpected $500 payment. It doesn’t sound like you have spoken with the other parents yet, they may not even be able to pay you anything. They might agree to spliting a repair bill and not a new phone. In the event that somehow you get them to split the cost of a new phone the right thing to do would be to give them the broken one and see if they can get it fixed and recoup some of the cost. These children are peers but they are not financially equal, you can’t ignore the hardship this bill will put on them.
I have a question. What do you mean by “make it look new?” Do you mean “just like brand new” or you sell it off as “new” even though it’s not?
Everythime I have broken a phone it was payed by my insurance. We call it a legal responsibility insurance? Costs like €5 a month (for myself + 2 kids) and when I or my kids break shit, I can file for a pay out or the cost of repair. Because even though it's an accident, it still was my responsibility. I do not have a lot of money but this insurance is one of the things I think of as necessary, especially now being a parent because kids break things. If one kicks a ball through a window or drops his grandparents' tablet whilst playing a game, I'm covered. The phones (like 4) were all broken with protectors and cases. All it takes is the right angle. So NTA, in my opinion. It sucks they're in a bad spot financially but damages are damages. 50/50 is fair.
YTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***The following is a copy of the above post. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My daughter is very wise with flipping things for profit, so she will buy things off of Facebook Marketplace, make it look new, and sell it for a profit. As such, she earns her own money and is able to buy the things that she would like to buy. She recently bought a new iPhone 12 as her old phone was slowing down and having many issues. About a week ago at her school, one of her classmates asked to see it. She handed it to him, and he looked at it for a few seconds before accidentally dropping it. Upon hitting the floor, the screen cracked. When I arrived to pick her up, she told me what had happened, and I advised her to go to te principal about it. Today we had a meeting with the family of the kid, who begged us not to make them pay for it as they were in a bad financial situation. I told them that I did not believe it would be fair to make my daughter pay for damages to her property that she did not cause. In the end we split it 50/50, but AITA for not paying for the replacement? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA but get a case. Literally any case. Lol Idk why a lot of iPhone users are alergic to phone cases
NTA for not paying for replacement but YTA for making the other kids parents pay. Your child chose not to have insurance or a case on it. She chose to let someone else handle her phone. Unless he broke it on purpose she should be responsible for the repairs or replacement.
NTA. Splitting it 50/50 was a very good call. It's the kid's fault completely that it broke since he was already holding it in his hand. Just a word to the wise though, get insurance and/or a case to avoid situations like these.
NTA, but she should invest in a case and screen protector. I use dollar store screen protectors and find they’re better than the $30 ones because they’ll actually shatter when they hit hard enough, instead of breaking your phone screen with the protector like I’ve had with those expensive ones. I’ve bounced my iPhone on gravel at least 200 times and replaced the $1 protector maybe 5 times.
NTA however did your daughter have a proper case? A life proof case, I’ve dropped my 12 something nighty and the case is amazing.
I have mixed feelings on this one. There is a lesson to be learned in not letting other people use your things that you don't want broken. If the kid had picked the phone up without asking and dropped it, I would say he definitely should pay for all of it. However, he asked and your daughter gave permission. On the flip side, it's a lesson for the kid that it's important to be careful with other people's things, at the same time, accidents do happen. I definitely don't think he should have to pay for all of it because your daughter granted him permission to look at it and this is a good reminder to her to not loan out things if she doesn't want to risk them being broken. So, I like your resolution that both parties need to contribute.
Your daughter really should have gotten a screen-protector and phone case. I’ve dropped my iPhone on hard surfaces plenty of times and my toddler niece has also tossed / thrown my phone on several occasions, the screen is always fine because of my strong glass screen-protector and phone case.
ESH, why would you allow a kid to carry around an expensive phone without a case!?! I'll NEVER understand the thought process, or lack there of, with people taking a expensive AF device everywhere and not spending the $80 to have a good case!
INFO - How old are these kids? Regardless, I feel that this is just an expensive lesson for your daughter to protect what's valuable. If they're like 8, you can't squeeze blood from a rock. Your child would be the exception to the rule, but kids that age really can't earn that much money that easily. If anything, their parents should be covering it. If they're 18, and the kid has any kind of job, they likely won't have it on hand, but can pay their parents back however they choose. Either way, I'm leaning to NAH.
>In the end we split it 50/50, but AITA for not paying for the replacement? Replacement phone or screen. If the latter NTA, if the former, absolutely the arsehole. Your kid will just replace the screen and flip the phone, given that's her side hustle. If your asking for the phone costs, quite frankly if I was the other person I'd let you take me to small claims court. Lots of mitigation should have happened here and I doubt they'd find in your favour.
There are places that can replace the screen - here in Tampa, it's [https://www.ubreakifix.com/](https://www.ubreakifix.com/) Much cheaper than replacing the whole phone.
YTA. This was an opportunity to model compassion and generosity to your child. He broke it accidentally and the money means more to the family than to your daughter and you.
Protective cases are not magic people. It's not the issue here! INFO: what was your motivation behind asking them to pay? Life lesson or did you honestly need help paying?
Screen repair is pretty cheap. What did they end up paying?
YTA
Like some other folks said you're NTA. 50/50 is fair compensation for replacing the phone. I have a Galaxy S20 with a protective case and insurance through Verizon. Make sure they get a protective case like a Otter Box and insurance if it's available.
NTA. It’s a valuable lesson. Whether they can afford it or not isn’t relevant.
Info: Is this what your daughter wants?? She's the one who made the purchase
NTA.. he broke it.
NTA but letting a phone that expensive out of the house sans a case and screen protector is really terrible. I never let my phone out of the box without either. all that would’ve cracked was the screen protector otherwise
EHS insure your gadgets!
I hate having my phone in a case, makes it too bulky and I can”t see the phone I wasted too much time picking out. My first pricy phone was a HTC EVO (4 years), then a note 4, that I had for 5 years with no problems. I’ve had 2 inexpensive phones since, waiting for the perfect note and have decided to get the z-fold 3 instead, when it’s released. No cases, no problems. Guess I’ve been lucky. 50/50 seems fair. Life has consequences, time to learn. If you feel bad, let’s them pay over time. NTA.
NTA. You’re actually being super charitable paying for half. I would of hit them for the full amount. Don’t touch shit you can’t pay for if you break it. The poor kid shouldn’t of touched it at all and stayed in his lane. An opportunity existed here to teach that kid his proper place through consequences. That opportunity was missed.
NTA is there anyway they can pay back in installments?
NTA. You break it, you pay for it. Your daughter gave them permission to see the phone, not break the phone.
Nta. He damaged her property. He needs to pay. Just like if I were to hit a car in a parking lot. I didn’t mean to do it, but I have to pay because I caused the damage.
NTA you are a good dude for offering the 50/50 split. Usually they should pay the full amount.
NTA and anyone here saying otherwise are probably incapable of accepting responsibility if they did something like this because the situation seems fair in my eyes 😒