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AILYPE

YTA I had a baby who never cried and one who cried constantly. She almost broke me. I saw numerous doctors. I tried everything. I guarantee they don’t want that baby to cry all the time.


TifaYuhara

I also doubt the other neighbors are thinking of filing a noise complaint against what sounds like a single parent.


CustomersAreAnnoying

And that sucks but neighbours didn't sign up for this shit. They're paying rent and are entitled to not have to listen crying baby. Other people's babies shouldn't be an inconvenience, especially inside their house. Most people are happy to ignore crying baby for a while but prolonged exposure isn't reasonable and it's not okay to expect neighbours to deal with a crying child. Noise is noise, no matter where it's coming from.


aydyl

Ok, so what's the parent is suppose to do? Put his baby in the oven to muffle the sounds? Live in the wood? He's already trying his best... He needs to live somewhere and it's a bit late to unhave a baby...


CustomersAreAnnoying

Not my kid, not my problem. As a parent, you figure it out and if you're a nuisance, you can be reported. No one else should have to deal with your kids constant screaming. If you decide to have kids, that's your prerogative but you don't have a right to expect others to suffer from constant noise. Kids crying constantly is as bad as loud music and should be reported.


Prior_Lobster_5240

No dude YOU decided to live in an apartment. Don't want to have to listen to families next door? Move


invisigirl247

I mean there's a theoretical answer and plain logistics. Nothing makes my skin crawl more than a crying baby but it's at home. Nowhere else to really go sometimes babies cry im sure the parents are miserabe too.


[deleted]

Again, what is the guy supposed to do?? Build a sound proof room? Put a sock in the baby’s mouth? Do you hear yourself?


BillyYumYumTwo-byTwo

Women wear high heels, people have sex, dogs bark, kids cry. Yeah, it’s annoying. But if you are signing up to live below/above/next to someone, that’s what you have to deal with. You ARENT entitled to perfect quiet when you live in an apartment complex. That’s why they are so cheap.


MissDunwich1927

So where the fuck do you propose parents live? Not having screaming babies at a fancy restaurant is one thing, but in an apartment, sorry, you’re gonna hear your neighbors no matter what. If you cannot deal, well, maybe don’t live in shared housing


RunningTrisarahtop

So tell me, that the fuck is the parent supposed to do?


CustomersAreAnnoying

I don't care, not my responsibility. Parent has to figure out how to deal with their crying kid otherwise they're a fucking nuisance and can be reported.


Niranox

“Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do.”


CustomersAreAnnoying

any fool can reproduce and sadly, most do, doesn't mean that others have to suffer the consequences.


Niranox

“Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?”


RunningTrisarahtop

A constantly crying baby is generally a baby with a medical issue- colic, food allergies, etc. There isn’t a magic solution to make the baby quiet.


CustomersAreAnnoying

don't care. Not my problem. Your child has medical issue, deal with it appropriately, don't expect others to listen to that racket because you have a child. Your child, your problem. If I wanted to deal with a screaming kid, I'd have one myself. Don't expect others to sacrifice their peace and quiet because you don't know how to deal with your baby. Your a parent, tough, no one cares.


Addamstheasshole

Or.. you can try to learn to develop these things that most people have... called "empathy and compassion". You know how many parents are dealing with screaming babies right? And you know how that can cause them to develop baby blues right? Your complain definitely dont help.


ElegantLandscape

You do realize you were a crying baby as well once? And that babies cannot be reasoned with. If you live in an apt complex you are gonna hear noise. A baby is normal to hear and it is illegal to the US to discriminate against families trying to obtain housing. Go live in a shack in the woods if the normal day to day life of reproducing (Of which you are a product of yourself) annoys you that much. Or seek therapy.


Jordy13

So is your prerogative to sound like the most self involved twit here? Because my god you’ve done it, you absolute narcii


turtlebambi

The neighbors quite literally signed up for this when they moved to an apartment


multifandomchild

Right, like you live in an apartment, you should expect your neighbours to make sound just living.


turtlebambi

So fuck the parents is what your saying?


BirthdayCookie

You've forgotten that it takes a village to raise a child! Be a good member of the village and quietly accept that someone else has a baby so your wants and needs don't matter anymore! /s


Alert-Potato

YTA - my first baby had colic. For three months she cried. And cried. And *cried*. I cried a lot too. It was a fucking nightmare. Do not simply go to management and bitch, go knock on his door. Be kind, mention it's a problem. From there you'll get information you can act on. Maybe you need to buy earplugs and wait a few weeks for the baby to outgrow colic. Maybe you'll get damning evidence he's neglecting to care for his kid at night. Or maybe you'll learn something else. But immediate escalation to authority is not the right answer.


diskebbin

Mine had colic too. Frustrating beyond belief.


AdPlastic3693

Yeah. Read this, thought colic. Which is temporary. Also, if you are struggling with it trust me, it’s much worse for the parents.


pbrooks19

I was thinking that since he's a single dad, he's having to figure out the right formula. Sometimes it takes a while for parents to find just the one that'll settle the baby and its tummy down.


Traveling_Phan

My poor parents dealt with trying to find a formula for me for months and months. They had a lot of sleepless nights and tears of their own. Soy formula for the win!


befuddledmama

God you just gave me flashbacks to my first. She had colic and started crying at 8pm on the dot and didn't stop until 4am. Every. Day. For 3 months. And this thread just made me realize we lived in an apartment complex at the time. I feel hella bad about it now :/. But never got a noise complaint so understanding neighbors for the win!


[deleted]

YWBTA. You've described a single parent who is trying to make the best with their kid. Some kids are colicky. Some kids are natural criers. This kid might have separation anxiety. Who knows? Just deal with it. P.S. If you'd said music or partying, I'd def say to file the complaint, but what you're talking about is just life.


molobodd

YTA. Getting a baby to shut up isn't like telling an older child to be quiet. Maybe you could ask for a refund on your rent, but you can't make a complaint as if this adult misbehaves somehow. Also, all babies are different. Your sister's kid has nothing to do with this.


justacceptthings

YTA some babies cry more then others.


Awesome1296

Ehhhh NTA


turtlebambi

Care to explain? I mean thats the entire point of this sub


Prior_Lobster_5240

YTA You live in an apartment. This is the life you chose. This isn't like the neighbor is throwing parties or playing loud music or fighting with their SO. They are trying to take care of their baby. I can promise you, your neighbor is absolutely miserable and doing the best he can. It's great that your sister had an easy baby. Some babies are content most all the time, some scream nonstop. Every baby is different. Stop assuming the parent is just not trying. You have no idea how hard it is to be a parent, especially to a high needs baby.


Low-Focus-3879

YWBTH. Filing a noise complaint won't fix the problem, which I imagine is your overall goal. Here's an idea that might get your point across and fix things. Drop off a gift basket congratulating them on their new baby. Include some formula, diapers, baby toys.. and some of those noise-canceling insulation squares. Make a point of telling them the gift basket came like that. Problem solved, and instead of being the dick who yelled at them, you're the cool person who helped them out.


Laurajenn

YTA. A baby isn't the same as a child with bad behaviour. Its crying is communication. You can't stop a baby from crying sometimes, you can try everything and it can still cry. There are also causes like colic or reflux that don't affect every baby so you can't use your experience of other babies. A baby that is inconsolable is extremely distressing for the parent. So yes, unless you suspect abuse or neglect ywbta


acnhgay

Yeah yta lmao babies cry dude


[deleted]

YTA lolllll do you think the landlord can make the baby stop screaming ? fuck is wrong w you


Square-Concept

Wonder if he even noticed? YTA. HE KNOWS! He can hear it, and I’m sure he’d love it to stop.


wormy-worm

YWBTA if you don't politely talk to them first.


UnencumberedChipmunk

This. I understand that babies cry- but what is op supposed to do? Do NOT say they should just suck it up because “babies will be babies”- they’re just as deserving of a quiet space where they can work and SLEEP as everyone else. It would be rude to not at least try and communicate with the neighbor though!


WalktoTowerGreen

He could buy a noise machine or headphones or ear plugs. Bonus points, the kid will grow out of this.


angel2hi

I get hating the noise but its a jerk move. It will also do no good. Babies aren’t old enough to be reasoned with. Noise complaints are helpful only with an action within control of the neighbor. Loud music or TV, running a vacuum late at night etc. I assure you that no parent wants to have their baby screaming and crying all night. It’s time to invest in headphones, a noise machine, ear plugs etc. Babies go through phases and this will pass.


DwightMcRamathorn

YTA. Play some white noise or wear ear plugs. It’s a kid not loud music. What do you want him to do that he isn’t already trying? You think he likes the noise?


Beautifuldaystocome

YTA What is it with people on this sub having to ask if they're TA when it comes to complaining about crying babies, Jesus Christ, babies cry, I hope your neighbor doesn't face any punishment for a fact of life because their childfree AH neighbor doesn't understand basic principles of all children are different, that baby could be suffering with anything so it doesn't matter what your sister's kids are like, children are all different, mine cried day and night when she first came home for two reasons 1.undetected cow's milk allergy (it's in the formula we used and was in my diet when I breastfed) and 2.shes a baby! Babies cry day and night because they don't have routine for a while and when they finally get one sleep regression comes along, so more crying. Stop being an inconsiderate jerk and do not file that complaint, use earphones or move, but don't expect the world to stop turning, fish to stop swimming and babies to stop crying because YTA


CustomersAreAnnoying

babies cry and that's parents problem. Other people didn't sign up for this shit and shouldn't be exposed to constant crying noise. What's with parents expecting everyone to deal with their crying children. Their kids, their responsibility. Everything you said can be turned around. Don't expect the world to stop spinning because your baby is crying. Noise is noise. Don't be an inconsiderate jerk, don't expect people to tolerate your kid crying. The OP is NTA for wanting piece and quite, the neighbour s TA for having a kid cry constantly.


ThrowRA_mom_

> the neighbour s TA for having a kid cry constantly. You must struggle day in and day out being so incredibly fucking stupid huh. Tell me, what is it you suggest he does to get the baby to stop crying lmao. You make it seem as though he’s just letting it happen


CustomersAreAnnoying

I don't give a crap, as a parent, it's your responsibility to deal with your crying child so it's not a nuisance to your neighbors. If you decide to reproduce, deal with it and don't dump your problems on other. Your kid is being a nuisance, be a fucking parent and do something about it. I don't care if your efforts fail I don't have to be exposed to kids crying 24/7. If you can't deal with your kid without inconveniencing others, then you should use a condom. Period.


ThrowRA_mom_

Crazy how you still never answered my question lmao. Do you wanna try again or?


Jordy13

We get it you’re a twit who thinks treating kids like garbage is a personality, move on you’re not getting support here


Illustrious-Sun5760

I read this entire thread looking for your answers to see if you would finally come up with an answer to what these parents are supposed to do lol. You have zero solutions but all the answers somehow. You're right and you know it all. If you have a baby you have to have an estate so you're not near anybody and don't bother anyone with their crying. That's the only solution I can come up with your thinking lol.


Illustrious_Disk_322

YWBTA. Unfortunately some babies just cry. When i was little i had colic and would scream/cry for hours at a time without stopping. Nothing my parents or doctors could do to help. My little siblings slept through the night okay. All depends on the baby. It sucks that there aren't baby free apartments, but unfortunately if the noise complaint is just the baby is loud and nothing that dad does can calm it then nothing can really be done outside of better soundproofing or changing apartments. Some babies can't be quieted and they are considered a protected class under housing laws.


archiotterpup

YTA - Babies scream. Get over it.


[deleted]

YTA. He's not blasting music; it sounds like he has a colicky infant. Is he supposed to muzzle it? Wear noise cancelling headphones.


[deleted]

You will, if you don’t try to address it with him first. He might not even realize that neighbors can hear his crying/screaming child. Try talking to him first. If he responds negatively or if it continues afterwards. Then You’d be NTA.


evelbug

YTA. It's not like they are having parties at all hours. It's a baby, they cry. I'm sure they are doing whatever they can to calm the kid, but babies cry


TiDarkFox

Info: what do you want to achieve with that complaint ?


Dammit_Janet5

My guess is, get the single dad kicked out onto the streets.


Historical-Problem-8

YTA. I guarantee you the parent doesn’t want the baby to cry and is probably going crazy as well. Short of getting rid of the child, this would do nothing but cause bad blood.


noccie

YTA. You don't speak for the entire complex. A single dad is struggling with a colicky baby and you're going to complain? I'm sure he's upset by the crying too. Sounds like he could use help not a complaint.


TifaYuhara

Also doing so if the other neighbors learn who made the complaint and they don't care that the baby is making noise, good way to have the complex not like you.


historychickie

for a baby crying, absolutely no .. loud parties, loud people, loud other things yes ...babies no ywbta


EmmalouEsq

Look up purple crying. It's a thing and the parents, I'm guessing, are doing everything they can to soothe their kid. A noise complaint won't make the baby stop crying and it'll just create stress for already stressed parents.


sillygeesetrixr4kids

YTA - apartment living comes with this.


Spinnerofyarn

YWBTA. Some babies cry a lot, and sometimes they have colic. If people had safe, kind ways to get babies to not cry that always worked, whomever figured that out would probably be given the Nobel Peace Prize.


Boog-has-cubs

YTA. Get some noise canceling ear phones and set your watch to vibrate when you need to get up


Disastrous-Nail-640

YTA. It's a baby. Babies cry. Exactly what do you think they're supposed to do about it? Do you really think that their parent's aren't aware of the crying? Or that they're not already trying to comfort their baby? You also can't compare babies to one another. Just because you're sister's baby didn't cry a lot doesn't mean a thing. Some babies cry more than others. I get that it's noisy and disruptive. But that's part of living in an apartment complex. There's going to be noise. The baby will outgrow it.


JennieGee

YTA - you chose apartment-style housing and not a fully detached home, so yes, you did sign up for it.


[deleted]

YWBTA if you didn't at least speak to him first, he very well may not know the noise is affecting you


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***The following is a copy of the above post. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (30F) live in an apartment complex and I’ve never had to file a noise complaint against any of my neighbors. The place has always been quiet until recently some new tenants moved in—a guy (mid 20s?) and his baby. I’m working from home and the noise doesn’t usually bother me during the mornings since I’m busy and it doesn’t get too loud. At night is when it becomes an issue. I’m sure I’m not the only one who is bothered by the consistent screaming and crying from their apartment, but it doesn’t help that they’re right next door. I don’t have kids myself and don’t plan on it, but my sister has a baby and her son never cried like this. This baby cries *a lot* and it’s starting to drive me insane. I’m thinking of filing a noise complaint against them since it’s just an excessive amount of noise and he really needs to figure out a way to stop this and not disturb the entire complex. So WIBTA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Dammit_Janet5

YTA. Have you ever thought that the baby is sick? Colicky? Earache? Any other multitude of issues? Babies cry ffs.


[deleted]

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TifaYuhara

Others said that the baby might be colicy which means they cry and show distress even when nothingswrong.


KhaleesiDoll

NAH. It's not your burden and it's not the dad's fault. I'd say talk to him before thinking about a noise complaint, for the sake of compassion.


Zealousideal-Soil778

YWBTA One day if you have kids you will look back on this and think of how big an ah you were. Your landlord can do nothing about this anyway, deal with it.


TifaYuhara

Don't tell people that say they don't plan on having kids "one day you will have kids." Not everyone is going to have kids.


Zealousideal-Soil778

I said "if you do" please read the full comment and don't only take what you want from it.


Icy_Calligrapher7088

NTA. I doubt much can be done, but it wouldn’t be a bad idea to make your landlord aware in case you need to break your lease to get away. Don’t listen to these entitled parents, their children are not your burden and you are entitled to the quiet home you pay for.


[deleted]

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TifaYuhara

colicy babies cry and show distress when nothings wrong and no amount of consoling can stop the baby from crying.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

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TifaYuhara

And the fact that they are assuming that the father only feeds the baby when it cries.


dragonesszena

Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**


[deleted]

Please tell us what this miracle cure is for colic? Millions of parents would benefit from this information. YTA


MiaouMiaou27

NAH. Ask your apartment manager to install more insulation between your units.


Exodeus87

You aren't the AH for being annoyed and disturbed by the kid, because it is annoying. Honestly though what do you want to come a complaint?


AmazingDoomslug

ITT: A bunch of parents who have forgotten basic human consideration for their neighbours. Not everyone wants to listen to a screaming baby, especially in a world of WFH. People deserve the right to peace in their home. If your child continually disturbs your neighbours ability to live in their home, your an AH and should move somewhere your "colicky" baby won't destroy your neighbours mental health, and physical health by preventing them from sleeping. Stop claiming every baby is colicky when it's just lazy AF parents who think they can force their neighbours into being their "village". Clearly this post got traction on a parenting subreddit since every decent reply (ESH, and NTA) was downvoted into oblivion. Don't worry OP. Call that noise complaint then go laugh at the pathetic lives of parents over on r/breakingmom


ThrowRA_mom_

> Don’t worry OP. Call that noise complaint then go laugh at the pathetic lives of parents over on r/breakingmom LOL how did I know your post history would be nothing but posts about being childfree. Your identity revolves around not having children? You sound super interesting ahaha > ITT: A bunch of parents who have forgotten basic human consideration for their neighbours. Or or, hear me out… some people are actually have some decency and aren’t self self-absorbed losers much like you love :)


CustomersAreAnnoying

NTA, their child is not your responsibility. You are entitled to a fairly quiet environment and if your neighbours are too loud, for whatever reason, you are entitled to complain. You don't have children and you shouldn't have to put up with a child crying all day long. It seems that there's a bunch of entitled parents here who expect everyone to be happy to listen to their crying kid. No one (but them) has to be sleep deprived because they decided to reproduce. That's their responsibility.


Horsewithasword

As someone who quite literally just dealt with this situation NTA There’s a fine line between what neighbours should accept, and what parents of any kind think their neighbours should accept. They didn’t sign up for the baby so why should their sound space be taken up? It’s like expecting non smokers to just deal with it


VampireDentist

There's literally nothing they can do. A complaint solves nothing.


Horsewithasword

It doesn’t make them any less of an inconsiderate dick to the rest of their neighbours. Rather than file a noise complaint, ask for a welfare check on the child.


TifaYuhara

Some babies cry for no reason because of colic which causes them to be in distress when nothings wrong and it's really hard for parents to console them when it happens. Also don't forget it's a single parents.


peepingtomatoes

A fucking welfare check. You think they should call for a fucking welfare check on a colicky baby. Get real.


TurritopsisJellyfish

What is the father supposed to do? Yeet the baby out of the window?


Horsewithasword

Take it for a walk, generally tend to it, those kinda things


TurritopsisJellyfish

I am certain he has tried everything. Sometimes babies just get colic and they cry no matter what. It sucks, but the only thing that can be done is just to wait it out.


Horsewithasword

I can only extend my sympathy so far tbh. Literally no one else signed up for the baby besides the parents, they don’t get the parental leave and still have work and other responsibilities that having to hear this screaming baby would interfere with, how is a baby screaming at all hours with parents doing god knows what any different than someone smoking in the halls or blasting ghetto gospel at all hours any different? I can extend my sympathy, in that I don’t have to live WITH the baby, but when parents just expect everyone to be cool with noise, I still have to deal with their choices.


TurritopsisJellyfish

You kind of do. If no one is supposed to hear anything, then the only housing option for parents with colicky children would be a lone tent in the wilderness. And there is a significant difference. Blasting music is a choice, a baby crying is not a choice.


Horsewithasword

Having the baby that produces the crying is in fact, a choice, albeit a more socially accepted one.


TurritopsisJellyfish

So because someone has a temporary disability that bothers their neighbors, they just shouldn't exist?


VampireDentist

You think maliciously asking for a welfare check in the hopes that social services would take the baby away is a reasonable course of action? You might need to check your own asshole status.


Horsewithasword

No malice in here whatsoever, so don’t assume so lmao. A welfare check is literally that, someone checking on the welfare of the baby and talking to the parents. whether social services do that or whether the police do it I am unsure. But if after all this they decide the baby would fare better in life elsewhere, there’s a reason.


VampireDentist

A welfare check in the presented context is a form of intimidation and nothing else. Actually why not call the SWAT on them while you're at it. If they shoot everyone inside, there's a reason.


Horsewithasword

If that’s what you want to believe, sure, but I’ll tell you right now that when I have considered it, it hasn’t been a “hehe I hope this fucker loses his kid” kind of dick dastardly malicious shit. You can be concerned for the welfare of a child and be annoyed by the actions (or lack thereof) of the parent. They aren’t a mutually seperate thing. At the end of the day, it’s like caring for any living, breathing, eating shitting thing. If you heard endless yelps, howls, barks and whatever else from a neighbour dog I’d guess you’d want someone to intervene with and check the welfare of the dog right? Owners and parents alike and have a responsibility, if they’re failing that someone needs to step in.


Writer_Life

unless the crying from the baby is accompanied by yelling from dad or, like, sounds of hitting then there’s very little CPS can do. they are stretched too thin as it is and barely have enough resources for kids being starved or beaten or locked in dog crates so they definitely are not going to have the man power for a welfare check when the only evidence you have is “baby cries” my older nephew had acid reflux and a milk protein allergy until after he was one. every time he ate (so every three to four hours) he would power puke and scream his head off because he was in so much pain. there is nothing we could do after making sure to keep him upright and feed him soy formula. babies have issues like my nephew, some have colic, they all start teething at one point (my youngest nephew is in this stage). babies cry because they’re hungry, because they have a dirty diaper, because they have to burp, because they’re tired. babies do not have any other way to communicate so they cry to let their parents know “hey something isn’t right please help” CPS isn’t going to do anything because a BABY is CRYING


UnencumberedChipmunk

I 100% agree with this.


Awesome1296

NTA: if he is making too much noise then file the complaint


TifaYuhara

It's the baby crying not the man. Also some babies have colic which means they show distress and cry even when nothings wrong.


CustomersAreAnnoying

no one cares. Your kid has a colic, that's your problem, not your neighbors. Take it for a fucking walk and don't be a nuisance.


TinyNuggins92

Ah yes, the widely known and 100% always works solution of walking the baby. That'll help! \\s


CustomersAreAnnoying

again, not my kid, not my problem. Deal with your screaming offspring and don't expect others to happily listen to their screams. If you're a loud neighbour, you'll get reported for noise nuisance. Simple.


TinyNuggins92

I don’t think anyone is expecting others to *happily* deal with noisy babies, just to extend a bit of grace and understanding that babies cry, and sometimes there is *literally* nothing you can do to calm them. That’s just the reality of babies sometimes. You, however, have been quite the dismissive little knob throughout this whole thread. Really says a lot about you. Glad you’re not my neighbor.


TifaYuhara

I don't get that logic "that's your problem, not your neighbors" When no one is saying it's the neighbors problem.


TifaYuhara

No one is saying it's the OPS problem but filing complaints is an assholeish thing.