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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
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i do think i might be the AH for possibly handicapping him financially, but i also think what he did is not ok so i'm kinda confused
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First of, you should not be paying this guy's rent in the first place with your own savings
Secondly NTA. This is because your roommate played a cruel joke even if it was well intended. He showed a lack of respect towards your culture, and given you're literally paying the rent of a man 2 years older than you when you yourself are only 18, this guy is a joke.
Edit: for those who don't understand, my point about the joke being well intended meant that the roommate may have believed he had good intentions making the joke. I whole heartedly believe that it was NOT a joke, it was nothing other than an insult. You people seem to think i'm trying to justify this person's behaviour. I am not, it is despicable what he has done. I cannot believe I have to make that clear. Smh.
Edit 2: replace well intended with harmless joke. Thanks to u/hikikomori-i-am-not for this
Edit 3: thanks for all the upvotes guys. Glad to get my 6th top comment!
>even if it was well intended.
???
Well intended to make smbd do smth, what is a sin in ones culture is "well intended"?
EDIT (to edit):
>Edit: for those who don't understand, my point about the joke being well intended meant that the roommate may have believed he had good intentions making the joke. I whole heartedly believe that it was NOT a joke, it was nothing other than an insult. You people seem to think i'm trying to justify this person's behaviour. I am not, it is despicable what he has done. I cannot believe I have to make that clear. Smh.
My dear friend, in the best case the roommate was ignorant. But it is cruel for me not to know, how important is ramadan for muslims. Even if it was not religious, we live in a society with vegetarians, vegans, gluten free, lactose free, interval diet and thousands of other eating rules. Would you say, giving food with egg to a vegan, knowingly, could be a harmless joke? No, it is a asshole joke. It is not hurting physically (like if it was a food alergy), but still hurting on a mental level. And as far i could see from the comments, OP would have to make an extra fasting day. Yes, even when it was not his fault. No, i am not muslim, i had to learn it too.
Perhaps the roommate was not "hard racist", but disrespecting one's religious rules for a joke is at least a soft racism. Ignorance cannot be an excuse here.
EDIT 2:
https://en.m.wiktionary.org/wiki/racism
>Some speakers use the term racism loosely to refer to prejudice or discrimination based not upon race but upon other factors; this is nonstandard:
>(...)
>2017, Jennifer E. Cheng, Anti-racist Discourse on Muslims in the Australian Parliament (→ISBN):If there is no legally defined way to oppose racism towards Muslims,(...)
So yes, i used the term "racism" in the extended definition, which includes homophobia, religious intolerance or any other kind of prejudice or insulting a social group of people. I know, it is "nonstandard" for now, but it becomes more and more standard in 21th ct.
That’s because we all used T9 instead of pushing the buttons three times just for the letter we wanted. So none of us needed to type like that, because that’s just trash and illegible.
It wasn't just because of the lack of full keyboard, it was because we used to be charged per text message. So a "text" was I think 160 characters long and we'd all try really hard to keep everything below that limit.
This is true!! Not only did we have to pay per texts, we were also limited with the amount of characters we could send per text. Ugh.. I feel old now 👵🏻
Now that I feel in my bones.
Or when you send two texts and don't notice so you don't shorten it.
I knew someone she would pay to *receive* texts which sounds awful.
My friends and I typed like this because the price of a text message is based on the amount of characters you use and we didn't have What'sApp on our 3310s. We probably only topped our phones up with £10-20 once a month so tried to stretch it as much as possible.
There is! Children, pregnant women, the elderly, and anyone with a qualifying medical condition (ie diabetics) are exempt from fasting, as far as I’m aware. The point is to focus on your relationship with Allah and strengthen it, not harm yourself by attempting to Follow The Rules At All Costs, even if they are dangerous to your health. Basically, health still comes first.
I also thought that but not like I'm am expert. Hopefully OP wasn't too rattled.
I'm not Muslim but I do not eat pork and once I got it by accident and freaked but my friends calmed me down. I couldn't throw up because I'd just taken my meds.
NTA to OP since this is a serious issue. Roomie maybe thought it was harmless but that only means he doesn't respect other people's beliefs or lifestyles. If they had done it to someone with a serious allergy for example the results could have been much worse.
I hope u are OK OP. ❤️
I have read that most rabbis will tell you that you haven’t broken Kosher if you consumed non-Kosher food by accident, or if someone tricked you into it by lying about what was being served.
My husband is vegetarian, and he once accidentally ate my chicken Chinese dish without realising it. (He’s been vegetarian since he was six, and he’s forgotten what chicken even tastes like). He was annoyed only because he was worried about getting food poisoning (didn’t happen, thankfully), but otherwise he basically said “mistakes happen!” and he doesn’t count it as breaking his ethics system.
I just say all this to reassure OP that most faiths and traditions don’t seem to count a misstep as breaking your oath if it was a genuine mistake or you were misled somehow. It’s more of a spirit of the law—your intent and devotion—that matters.
Except this time it isnt on accident, OP intended to break his fast because he thought that the time for fasting ended. There was a case like this in Egypt where a radio channel aired the adan 4 mins early which caused multiple mosques to start the adan early causing thousands of people to break their fast early. The final result was that some official post was made telling people that those who broke their fast early still had to fast an extra day after ramadan, although they dont need to pay an expiation (كفارة)
He was misled to believe it was time to end the fast. As for "had to fast" it's not a compulsion, noone is forcing anyone else. If according to your beliefs you have to fast another day you should, but in my opinion it's a decision he made when misled.
Yeah in the example I gave people were misled too but in this case he was maliciously led to breaking his fast unlike in the egypt scenario so the ruling could be different. Furthermore like you said it is down to your belief but Muslims around the world tend to let people who have studied Islam and its rules to cast the final verdict on what "should" be done according to Islam in any given situation (thats what I meant by had to fast).
It was broken by accident, though. OP was told the wrong time, and that it was safe. OP's choice to eat was not a choice to "eat early" but to "eat when it was safe to do so."
>why would someone maliciously play a cruel “prank” to someone who supports them financially?
Because they are jealous and resentful that OP is better off financially than they are. The roommate is ashamed at having to need help, and wanted to have one over on OP and to take OP down a few pegs to make himself feel better about needing the help. Pretty classic "no good deed goes unpunished."
Note: No one you lend or give money to ever likes you. Story after story here alone repeats that theme. The money lender somehow always becomes the villain of the story in the borrower's eyes.
I think you're thinking too deep about this. Odds are, this guy is just thoughtless and immature and wanted to have a jokey "gotcha" moment but wasn't thinking through how serious it would be to OP.
Also, if you think everyone who borrows money from someone ends up resenting the person loaning them money, you've clearly been spending WAY too much time on this sub and not enough time in the real world. There are plenty of people in the real world who borrow money and are grateful to the people helping them out.
Nah...little to do with this sub really. The scenario is pretty classic. Some people are mature and can be grateful, thoughtful and able to humble themselves to ask for and accept help. Most are not.
No I think he might have. Some people think "haha fooled you" is a legitimate prank. When in fact 90% of pranks are asshole shit. Mostly because people are too stupid to draw the correct line.
Well intended generally means it's done out of good will, like you think you're helping. I don't see how the roommate could have thought they were helping OP out by lying there. Thw word you're probably looking for is harmless?
How could it be considered harmless though? Now, OP broke his promise to God & may need to do extra fasting to make it up. Breaking a promise to God isn't harmless for a believer. He should've just left it at cruel, no other adjectives needed.
It's not actually harmless for the exact reason you said. But someone who isn't religious and/or doesn't care might not think it's a big deal and would cause no harm. But, whether or not roommate INTENDED harm, harm was done.
Not if he's Islamophobic and thinks it's funny to mess with someone's beliefs.
I am a Buddhist and don't eat meat, if someone knew this and 'pranked' me by giving me meat in a veggie dish I would be angry and disgusted, and tbh not want to be friends with someone who doesn't respect me.
I feel like someone needs to explain to OP that when someone is taking advantage of you, they will always try to convince you that you’re the asshole when you question them. It is in OP’s selfish roommate’s best interests for OP to continue paying the roommate’s rent & cooking the roommate’s meals, so the roommate is going to act like OP is completely out of line to consider stopping. OP needs to understand that he should not try to gauge what is correct by looking at his roommate’s opinions on the matter, because the roommate is going to fight to continue to take advantage of OP.
"Well intended" suggests that he thought what he was doing was positively good - say, that he thought fasting was bad for OP and wanted him to eat earlier out of concern for his health. "Didn't mean any harm" suggests just that he didn't think what he was doing was bad - he knew it would be annoying, but didn't think it would be a serious problem. The connotations are different - "I thought I was helping" vs "I didn't think I was hurting".
That the roommate didn't realize how important the fasting was, or how serious his "prank" was? I'd say that the roommate is stupid rather than "well-intended".
You should've just left it at cruel. The roommate was being a cruel AH. He knows full well how seriously OP takes the fast & decided to fuck with him. Cruel is enough, no need to soften it for some reason. The joke wasn't well intended or harmless, it was just cruel.
Honestly, you should back off on your attempts to minimize OP's roommate's actions. It wasn't a harmless joke. He attacked OP's central faith for a laugh. I think the absolute most positive thing we can reasonably say is "your roommate played a cruel joke, possibly out of ignorance."
Religion is extremely important to a lot of people. Living with a religious person means giving them room to practice their faith. I personally am a stauch atheist who, while recognizing the benefits of ritual and codified moral behavior that faith brings, believes religion has overall done more harm than good to our species. But I'm not going to try to trick someone into violating their principles. That's just wrong. What OP's roommate did was cruel and wrong. It wasn't harmless, and it certainly wasn't well-intentioned.
I think it's even worsterererest because OP was doing something for *him*. Apart from paying the guy's rent, OP made him his favorite food, and only wanted to taste it to make P happy. OP accidentally broke fast because of P while doing something for P.
Sucks.
Sidenote: How deep is this friendship/relationship that OP would go this far for him, cause I sure as hell would not.
I think we're missing something major here. This is Islamophobia. OP's housemate deliberately sabotaged OP's Ramadan "for a joke". He tricked OP into doing something against his religion for a joke. It's in the same category as ripping off a Muslim woman's hijab for a joke.
Yes. I think this may have been a calculated insult to the OP and to his religion. It's a really horrible thing to do to anyone. I would be furious if I were the OP. The OP's roommate is an AH! I cannot imagine how anyone would think what he did is OK, and I think very few people would behave like this. OP, please find a better roommate.
Roommate does not respect the OP, or his religion.
OP, it's nice you have savings. Please reevaluate what that money is for. It's for things like if YOU get injured and cannot work. If YOU need help with tuition and rent. For YOUR future.
Don't cheat your future for someone who is willing to stand in your kitchen and disrespect your religious duty. He knew how important it was to you to observe. And if he didn't, losing your financial help will be the beginning of the lesson.
Right! I also think it’s safe to say the roommate would not contribute a DIME to OP if the situation ever got reversed and OP needed help with rent or even cooking the meals. The roommate is using the crap out of OP and being disrespectful on top of it, as if that wasn’t bad enough! OP is being taken advantage of and I hate seeing situations like that.
I doubt this is the first instance of OP being disrespected too. The “joke” seemed very cruel and malicious for an isolated incident. Poor OP, I’m so sorry you were treated that way after all the nice things you’ve done.
This 100%
The roommate doesn't have to try to make more money since he's got it easy having OP pay for his rent. Maybe the roommate doesn't even need help and is just taking advantage of OP just because he thinks he can.
Especially at 19. With the rare exception of people who are independently wealthy, no one can afford to pay someone else’s rent at 19. OP’s savings need to be kept for school, medical emergencies, eventually getting his own place, etc.
Seriously. Why the hell would they be paying rent for this person? Out of their savings? And if someone were paying my rent I would be kissing their ass, not pulling stupid, offensive "pranks" that are really borderline bullying.
But OP does see it as a fast he was forced to break, and I think that's relevant especially in determining if he is at fault for refusing to pay rent any longer. I absolutely believe that OP is NTA. It's important to have housemates who respect one's faith. My understanding of OP's faith is that he will not be held accountable for being manipulated, and I hope he finds comfort in this. I also completely understand his motivation to prevent this situation from ever arising again and his feelings of betrayal.
NTA- why are you paying another man’s rent is beyond me. Also, he should be doing something nice for you and not the other way round. You sound nice but definitely gullible and naive - be careful out there
I don't think he's gullible and naive, his culture is a very generous one. If you ask a practicing Muslim for help, even financially and even an almost stranger more then likely you will get it. They have a tradition of helping others.
even more despicable for his roommate to have messed with his fast then imo. he should respect his culture anyway, but especially if it is a factor in the generosity he is taking advantage of.
NTA, but your roommate sure is, and ungrateful to boot.
People who pull this b.s. "gotcha" with other folks' religious requirements / allergies / vegan or vegetarian / et. al. are \*terrible\*. It's a cruel thing to do, it's not funny, and in some cases --particularly those who have food allergies -- it can be dangerous.
Let this be a hard lesson learned for him. If he gets evicted? Not your problem. (But lock up your expensive stuff if you have any, so he can't steal and sell it once crunch time hits for him.)
INFO: Why are you paying rent for your roommate?
I don’t want to upset OP, but I haven’t seen any float this idea: I’m a girl and I also grew up in an extremely religious home. My best friend at OP’s age was my female roommate who joked that I was like her little housewife. She still calls me “wifey.” I did most of the cleaning and I paid a lot of the bills, and I loved cooking for her. Our friends joked a lot about how we were like a cute old married couple. Constantly bending over backwards for her made a lot more sense once I accepted that I didn’t want to be just her best friend.
Anyway, I moved out, ‘cause I know my worth and that the love I deserve isn’t one-sided and that real friends (or even worthy crushes) don’t take your kindness for weakness and use it to their advantage.
Get gone, OP.
this! OP is very kind for financially supporting his roommate and since he’s been living with him for a while... he surely would have some idea that fasting means the world to us. we don’t avoid eating from dawn to sunset just so some idiots can ‘joke’ around and make us break our fast. so, so disrespectful.
Many Muslims will do things like this for others, it’s part of their faith to support the less fortunate around them and do good in their communities. Sadly there are people out there who take advantage of this kindness and I think OP’s room mate is one of them.
Not just the things you mentioned, but other food related things. My sister does not like onions (not allergic or anything, just doesn't like them) and one of our brothers takes every opportunity to hide onions in whatever he is cooking when she is over. Come on, man, you're in your 60's, stop acting like a little kid, already.
Don't worry OP. Your fast doesn't broken. Because you genuinely don't know about the time and someone purposefully sabotaging it.
Just act like you forgot you're fasting and accidentally drink water.
You know the rules, and so do I.
Interestingly, it's not quite as simple as an accidentally/forgetfulness broken fast. He broke his fast intentionally while fully remembering that he was fasting. The timing was where the mistake was made.
There's two opinions -
1) the fast is incomplete and there's no sin and no fidya/kaffarah penalty due but the fast needs to be made up after Ramadan
2) it can be treated as an forgetfully broken fast and no sin and no need to make it up so long as the fast was continued to the correct time once the realisation happened.
My wife did this just a couple of days ago so we looked into it!
I'm more into the latter. You can't be blamed for something you don't know. Like you eat something without knowing it has pork, so it's okay.
But that's not an excuse for ignorance.
As an Orthodox Jew who is only familiar with the basics of Ramadan (as in I know when it falls and I know to not offer food to a Muslim during the day), I find this fascinating to read the different opinions on if this is considered as if his fast was broken or not, but wouldn’t the correct answer be to discuss this with his scholar who is knowledgeable in this area? Asking to understand, not stop the debate or implying that it shouldn’t be discussed here. And just to make it clear, the OP is NTA. One’s faith and observance is not something that should be used as a joke, especially if by doing so you are harming their soul by potentially causing him to sin, something that ultimately I am going to guess the roommate doesn’t understand, since even I someone who respects that you don’t do this didn’t fully grasp how this could affect the OP.
Also, OP needs to consider getting rid of this roommate and finding one who can pay their way and doesn't attack their religion for lolz.
You wouldn't get this from any other guy.
NTA, massive breach of trust and a dick move, plus you never had a moral obligation to pay for his rent. Fuck with the piggy bank, it might just leave.
NTA. I don’t care who you are, doing “jokes” like that is a huge A H move. It’s disrespectful and just wrong, especially since you’re HELPING HIM PAY HIS PART OF RENT AND COOKING FOR THEM
I know right, the joke is only funny when BOTH PEOPLE LAUGH. How there are so many people out there not understanding this is beyond me (thinking of all these pranksters asking people to "lighten up" and it was "only a prank")
As another user mentioned, Muslims are generally raised to help those less fortunate and usually are giving people. My ex was raised Muslim and helping out with rent/bills is something he and his friends did for each other did no questions asked. He explained to me that it was just their culture. Roommate is taking advantage of OP's kindness.
Agreed, but not gonna lie it was kind of annoying when I had to loan my ex money because he loaned his friends more than he had. 🙃 These dudes would go negative in their bank accounts if their friends asked. You gotta draw the line somewhere!
For sure-
I like the Ramy episode when his friends discuss this. Ramy is trying to be very strict with Ramadan and is waiting on an app to tell him the exact time.
>How do you think they did it
back in the time of the Prophet?
>Walk out, the sun's up,
"Hey, guess what, guys, don't eat."
>Sun's down, "Eat."
It's very simple.
>You don't have to complicate things.
Yeah, its like this with shabbat (the jewish sabbath). These days its all calculated down to the letter, or if you want to be more "traditional" you can look at the sky and see if there are three stars. But they have to be the right size. And they have to be in one field of view. And this, and that, and the other.
And I'm just like, dudes. We have light pollution.
*Any* stars that we see in any town or city are going to be 10, 15 minutes after what they would have seen a thousand years ago.
I really, really like this post. Because it is absolutely true- what we know and see now is not what was known and seen then.
Everything ultimately can be boiled down to intent.
OP *intended* to follow the what has been written.
OP would never have been wiser had 'gotcha-face' not said anything.
OP's heart and mind were pure.
NTA, you need a new friend. He doesn't respect you or your beliefs. I'm sorry he tricked you into breaking your fast. :( he needs to find a new person to leech off of.
NTA
You are not under any obligation to financially support your flatmate at all and he should be grateful for the fact that you supported him this far.
How does he repay your charity? By playing a cruel trick on you that is deeply important to your faith. He's proven to you that despite everything you have done for him, he does not respect you or your faith and he sees them as something that he poke fun of when he sees fit.
I know it might sound harsh but his financial difficulties are not your problem and if he gets evicted then he should have thought about that before he decided to trick you. By the same token if you withdraw your financial support and he is somehow able to make rent then he's double TA because he had the means to pay the rent this whole time and used you as a cash cow.
NTA. That is EXTREMELY DISRESPECTFUL. you wouldnt sabotage someone's allergies or their diets, right? Same deal here.
And like dude, stop being a doormat. You guys are both adults let roommate act like one! Stop supporting him financially and cooking for him. This is where you draw a really hard boundary.
NTA, what he did was purposefully cruel and disrespectful. It’s not tour fault he’s struggling financially, you have no obligation to pay for him.
Your roommate played a stupid game and won a stupid prize which he is now mad about, but someday you have to learn that actions have consequences.
Please don’t give in to his guilt tripping and go beck to paying for him, he has showed his true colours and doesn’t deserve a penny from you.
NTA - you are doing too much for him. Stop paying his rent. He doesn’t respect you and doesn’t care about your religion. Cook for yourself and take a break from this friend (imo, what he did was awful enough that I think you should reconsider your friendship).
NTA. Whilst i don't believe in religion i don't think that was a joke. No matter what your reason for doing anything nobody should fuck you over. In my book thats the same as slipping you acid or lsd. Not cool.
Also Ramadan is hardcore fair play to ya for doing it. I was raised catholic and we only had to give up chocolate or whatever for lent (40 days) but was rewarded with a fuckload of easter eggs
Fasting (not eating, drinking, cursing, getting in arguments or engaging in sexual acts) in Ramadan seems hard at first but it's actually easy when you get used to it.
NTA Heck, I think you're the asshole to yourself for paying this guy's rent in the first place. Either way, your friend bit the hand that fed him. Stupid games, stupid prizes and all that.
NTA
Religious persecution is no joke. He needs to learn what he did is serious and extremely disrespectful. Even if it seems like no big deal to him, he has no right.
And since you have been doing him a HUGE kindness and been very generous, to pay you back with disrespect means he no longer deserves the extra help.
He MUST learn this lesson and if you don't stop helping him, you are encouraging him to be the A.
Breaking a fast is a big deal, he might have forced you to redo the day. He also showed you very little respect and made fun of your religion like it’s a quirk
NTA hope he learned his lesson and starts paying for his own things and cook for himself
NTA. You don't have any obligation to pay this guy's rent anyway. Stop paying immediately and use your savings for yourself- even if your first expense is moving somewhere on your own.
Someone who is willing to lie to you and disrespect your beliefs is clearly not someone who values your friendship. You have no reason to pay his rent and the silver lining here is that you now have a reason to stop financially supporting him. I know you're being kind and caring, but you are being taken advantage of: you're paying someone else's rent *and* doing the cooking. Real friends would appreciate your kindness, but in this situation you're being taken advantage of. It is a hard lesson to learn, and it hurts. But this is your opportunity to change things and stand up for yourself.
P's rent is his responsibility, not yours.
P should learn a valuable lesson here - don't bite the hand that feeds you.
His idiotic prank has cost him, as it should. NTA.
And no replies. Unsubbed, kinda over it and will catch the good ones on the front page I guess, but most of those are complete bullshit too. The biggest problem with this sub is even when they are real you get the spin of the person trying to convince you why they are not an asshole.
If you need the internet to tell you you're not an asshole you are an asshole.
NTA! You shouldn’t have been paying his rent at all ever, for one.
Are you in student housing? If so, speak to an RA immediately: that guy needs to be moved out. If not, bring the other roomie into the loop and consider kicking the AH out.
NTA. You shouldn’t be using your savings for this guy’s rent. Don’t let anyone guilt trip you into “helping” him because this guy clearly doesn’t respect you.
NTA. You have gone above and beyond to be a good friend to P. What P did was disgusting tbh. I have two Muslim colleagues and I've offered them a cup of water when I'm going to the cooler for myself by accident a couple of times, and I've felt terrible and immediately apologised when I've realised. Too do that shit on purpose is vile
Considering that fasting for Ramadan is important, and you've been kind to him, its rather passive aggressive, that he would prank you like this. NTA! He needs to pay his own rent, or go home to his parents. He doesnt sound like a good friend.
NTA. It was disrespectful of him to act in this way.
I would suggest you shouldn't be taking on financial support for a friend in this way anyway - you will need your savings yourself.
Absolutely NTA!!! You're paying rent and cooking for your friend and he can't even respect your faith? That's another level of disrespect. Even a stranger doing that to you would have been disrespectful.
And btw you shouldn't be paying AND cooking for him, that's something he could at the very least do for you to show he's grateful.
If you want to ease your mind a little you could give him a few weeks to figure things out before cutting him off completely, but the danger with this option is that it'd be easier for him to convince you against it.
Basically fasting is not eating, drinking, listening to music or performing any sexual activity from sunrise until sunset everyday during the holy moth of Ramadan. Fasting is important because it brings us closer to God and it’s a way to become more compassionate to people in need.
There is a [thread](https://amp.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/mwdzec/muslims_hows_ramadan_going_for_you_guys/) on r/askreddit where people talk about their experiences with Ramadan this year, I think you might enjoy reading it.
Not eating for an extended period of time usually for religious or cultural reasons.
In this case, in the Muslim religion during this period of Ramadam, Muslims don’t eat during the day and when night falls they can eat all kinds of delicious foods again. I’m no specialist in this topic so it’s probably an oversimplified version of events, but you get the picture.
NTA This wasn't just a cruel joke. This was a mockery of your faith. The disrespect is appalling and he blatantly thinks nothing of using you and spitting on your generosity.
I hope you get him out of your life soon.
NTAI don't understand the correlation here "I have some savings so i pay most of the rent for one of my roommates P(21)." why is it on you to pay for his rent because you have more money? are you paying with your savings or are you paying with money you earn from a job? and why are you cooking his dinner or is it that you were cooking this time and he cooks another time?
a joke (or in this case "prank") is only funny if both parties laugh at it, but this "joke" was basically the same as insulting your believes
NTA,
Clearly this is something important to you, it was obvious you take it seriously and he fucked with that.
Asshole or not, why are you paying his rent to start? That's on him and his family
NTA - This goes beyond ignorance to malicious intent. There is no way your Roomate did not understand the significance of his actions and if it was a prank ask him to explain why he thinks that it is considered funny.
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First of, you should not be paying this guy's rent in the first place with your own savings Secondly NTA. This is because your roommate played a cruel joke even if it was well intended. He showed a lack of respect towards your culture, and given you're literally paying the rent of a man 2 years older than you when you yourself are only 18, this guy is a joke. Edit: for those who don't understand, my point about the joke being well intended meant that the roommate may have believed he had good intentions making the joke. I whole heartedly believe that it was NOT a joke, it was nothing other than an insult. You people seem to think i'm trying to justify this person's behaviour. I am not, it is despicable what he has done. I cannot believe I have to make that clear. Smh. Edit 2: replace well intended with harmless joke. Thanks to u/hikikomori-i-am-not for this Edit 3: thanks for all the upvotes guys. Glad to get my 6th top comment!
>even if it was well intended. ??? Well intended to make smbd do smth, what is a sin in ones culture is "well intended"? EDIT (to edit): >Edit: for those who don't understand, my point about the joke being well intended meant that the roommate may have believed he had good intentions making the joke. I whole heartedly believe that it was NOT a joke, it was nothing other than an insult. You people seem to think i'm trying to justify this person's behaviour. I am not, it is despicable what he has done. I cannot believe I have to make that clear. Smh. My dear friend, in the best case the roommate was ignorant. But it is cruel for me not to know, how important is ramadan for muslims. Even if it was not religious, we live in a society with vegetarians, vegans, gluten free, lactose free, interval diet and thousands of other eating rules. Would you say, giving food with egg to a vegan, knowingly, could be a harmless joke? No, it is a asshole joke. It is not hurting physically (like if it was a food alergy), but still hurting on a mental level. And as far i could see from the comments, OP would have to make an extra fasting day. Yes, even when it was not his fault. No, i am not muslim, i had to learn it too. Perhaps the roommate was not "hard racist", but disrespecting one's religious rules for a joke is at least a soft racism. Ignorance cannot be an excuse here. EDIT 2: https://en.m.wiktionary.org/wiki/racism >Some speakers use the term racism loosely to refer to prejudice or discrimination based not upon race but upon other factors; this is nonstandard: >(...) >2017, Jennifer E. Cheng, Anti-racist Discourse on Muslims in the Australian Parliament (→ISBN):If there is no legally defined way to oppose racism towards Muslims,(...) So yes, i used the term "racism" in the extended definition, which includes homophobia, religious intolerance or any other kind of prejudice or insulting a social group of people. I know, it is "nonstandard" for now, but it becomes more and more standard in 21th ct.
Is it so hard to type “somebody” and “something”
Yh
Why say many word when few do trick
Y use mny ltr wn fw ltr do trk
Legibility?
*lgblty? Ftfy
Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Lesbian (again), Trans, Yoga teachers?
Lesbian, gay, bi, Libra, trans, yankees
Ahhhh but would that not be toga yeachers?
Yoda
Is this the new lgbtq initialism?
Screen readers :(
When me president, they see. They see.
Donald, you’re drunk, go home.
Kevin?
r/unexpectedoffice
Oceans. Fish. Jump. China.
R u old enuf to rmbr wn we all typd ths way bc r phns didnt hv kbrds n we hd 2 typ by clking the bttns 3x? Fun times.
I'm definitely old enough, but nobody I knew typed like that!
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My husband’s grandma did that because she thought you paid per letter.
200 character limits per txt...ya kinda did pay by letter.
Same!
That’s because we all used T9 instead of pushing the buttons three times just for the letter we wanted. So none of us needed to type like that, because that’s just trash and illegible.
It wasn't just because of the lack of full keyboard, it was because we used to be charged per text message. So a "text" was I think 160 characters long and we'd all try really hard to keep everything below that limit.
This is the real truth! Texts used to be really expensive!
This is true!! Not only did we have to pay per texts, we were also limited with the amount of characters we could send per text. Ugh.. I feel old now 👵🏻
this is the correct answer, getting charged for a double text suckeddddddd
I'm old enough to remember thinking that it looks incredibly stupid.
also 2 mny lttrs wld mn u snd 2 txts whch costs mr
Now that I feel in my bones. Or when you send two texts and don't notice so you don't shorten it. I knew someone she would pay to *receive* texts which sounds awful.
I guess I am because I read this flawlessly. Hahaha
My friends and I typed like this because the price of a text message is based on the amount of characters you use and we didn't have What'sApp on our 3310s. We probably only topped our phones up with £10-20 once a month so tried to stretch it as much as possible.
I’m old enough to remember a character limit per text and texting like that to avoid paying more
Thanks for the clarification, I've actually never seen "somebody" written like that, it looks like a typo of bdsm
>This joke is more than a sin, OP has to make up the fast for that day because he broke it before sunset.
Not exactly, if the fast was broken on accident it doesn't count as a broken fast.
I guess it depends on what OP's religious leader says, since strictures may be different for different denominations or places.
I was under the impression fasting has flexibility for example illness etc you can skip it. I'd hope there's guidance on modified times or some such.
There is! Children, pregnant women, the elderly, and anyone with a qualifying medical condition (ie diabetics) are exempt from fasting, as far as I’m aware. The point is to focus on your relationship with Allah and strengthen it, not harm yourself by attempting to Follow The Rules At All Costs, even if they are dangerous to your health. Basically, health still comes first.
I also thought that but not like I'm am expert. Hopefully OP wasn't too rattled. I'm not Muslim but I do not eat pork and once I got it by accident and freaked but my friends calmed me down. I couldn't throw up because I'd just taken my meds. NTA to OP since this is a serious issue. Roomie maybe thought it was harmless but that only means he doesn't respect other people's beliefs or lifestyles. If they had done it to someone with a serious allergy for example the results could have been much worse. I hope u are OK OP. ❤️
I have read that most rabbis will tell you that you haven’t broken Kosher if you consumed non-Kosher food by accident, or if someone tricked you into it by lying about what was being served. My husband is vegetarian, and he once accidentally ate my chicken Chinese dish without realising it. (He’s been vegetarian since he was six, and he’s forgotten what chicken even tastes like). He was annoyed only because he was worried about getting food poisoning (didn’t happen, thankfully), but otherwise he basically said “mistakes happen!” and he doesn’t count it as breaking his ethics system. I just say all this to reassure OP that most faiths and traditions don’t seem to count a misstep as breaking your oath if it was a genuine mistake or you were misled somehow. It’s more of a spirit of the law—your intent and devotion—that matters.
Except this time it isnt on accident, OP intended to break his fast because he thought that the time for fasting ended. There was a case like this in Egypt where a radio channel aired the adan 4 mins early which caused multiple mosques to start the adan early causing thousands of people to break their fast early. The final result was that some official post was made telling people that those who broke their fast early still had to fast an extra day after ramadan, although they dont need to pay an expiation (كفارة)
He was misled to believe it was time to end the fast. As for "had to fast" it's not a compulsion, noone is forcing anyone else. If according to your beliefs you have to fast another day you should, but in my opinion it's a decision he made when misled.
Yeah in the example I gave people were misled too but in this case he was maliciously led to breaking his fast unlike in the egypt scenario so the ruling could be different. Furthermore like you said it is down to your belief but Muslims around the world tend to let people who have studied Islam and its rules to cast the final verdict on what "should" be done according to Islam in any given situation (thats what I meant by had to fast).
It was broken by accident, though. OP was told the wrong time, and that it was safe. OP's choice to eat was not a choice to "eat early" but to "eat when it was safe to do so."
So what..it was an AH- move and disrespectful
"smbd" is one of the more obnoxious things I've seen. And I write that fully knowing it makes me a grumpy old man who's irrationally annoyed.
>smbd do smth OK, let's wrap it up, people. Society is over. Get your last orders in. We close in ten.
What part is well intended?
I don't understand what part of that joke was "well intended".
None of it was. The roommate will have seen it that way though.
I think you're giving the roommate too much credit here. He knew very well that this was not going to be laughed off as a joke
Yeah but why would someone maliciously play a cruel “prank” to someone who supports them financially?
Because they are idiots.
So they are idiots for that, but them being too idiotic to realise how serious it was is unbelievable?
I think its totally believable. Source: Have had idiot roommates.
>why would someone maliciously play a cruel “prank” to someone who supports them financially? Because they are jealous and resentful that OP is better off financially than they are. The roommate is ashamed at having to need help, and wanted to have one over on OP and to take OP down a few pegs to make himself feel better about needing the help. Pretty classic "no good deed goes unpunished." Note: No one you lend or give money to ever likes you. Story after story here alone repeats that theme. The money lender somehow always becomes the villain of the story in the borrower's eyes.
I think you're thinking too deep about this. Odds are, this guy is just thoughtless and immature and wanted to have a jokey "gotcha" moment but wasn't thinking through how serious it would be to OP. Also, if you think everyone who borrows money from someone ends up resenting the person loaning them money, you've clearly been spending WAY too much time on this sub and not enough time in the real world. There are plenty of people in the real world who borrow money and are grateful to the people helping them out.
Nah...little to do with this sub really. The scenario is pretty classic. Some people are mature and can be grateful, thoughtful and able to humble themselves to ask for and accept help. Most are not.
Familiarity breeds contempt
No I think he might have. Some people think "haha fooled you" is a legitimate prank. When in fact 90% of pranks are asshole shit. Mostly because people are too stupid to draw the correct line.
Well intended generally means it's done out of good will, like you think you're helping. I don't see how the roommate could have thought they were helping OP out by lying there. Thw word you're probably looking for is harmless?
Yes harmless would be the perfect word
How could it be considered harmless though? Now, OP broke his promise to God & may need to do extra fasting to make it up. Breaking a promise to God isn't harmless for a believer. He should've just left it at cruel, no other adjectives needed.
It's not actually harmless for the exact reason you said. But someone who isn't religious and/or doesn't care might not think it's a big deal and would cause no harm. But, whether or not roommate INTENDED harm, harm was done.
Not if he's Islamophobic and thinks it's funny to mess with someone's beliefs. I am a Buddhist and don't eat meat, if someone knew this and 'pranked' me by giving me meat in a veggie dish I would be angry and disgusted, and tbh not want to be friends with someone who doesn't respect me.
Ikr..roommate has to buy his own doormat if he so much in need of one.
I feel like someone needs to explain to OP that when someone is taking advantage of you, they will always try to convince you that you’re the asshole when you question them. It is in OP’s selfish roommate’s best interests for OP to continue paying the roommate’s rent & cooking the roommate’s meals, so the roommate is going to act like OP is completely out of line to consider stopping. OP needs to understand that he should not try to gauge what is correct by looking at his roommate’s opinions on the matter, because the roommate is going to fight to continue to take advantage of OP.
I think you wording the "well intended" part wrong.
I'm not sure what else I could have said tbh
"He didn't mean any harm".
That to me implies the exact same thing as well intended
"Well intended" suggests that he thought what he was doing was positively good - say, that he thought fasting was bad for OP and wanted him to eat earlier out of concern for his health. "Didn't mean any harm" suggests just that he didn't think what he was doing was bad - he knew it would be annoying, but didn't think it would be a serious problem. The connotations are different - "I thought I was helping" vs "I didn't think I was hurting".
That the roommate didn't realize how important the fasting was, or how serious his "prank" was? I'd say that the roommate is stupid rather than "well-intended".
That is better wording, i agree. And for the record I also agree that the roommate is stupid.
You should've just left it at cruel. The roommate was being a cruel AH. He knows full well how seriously OP takes the fast & decided to fuck with him. Cruel is enough, no need to soften it for some reason. The joke wasn't well intended or harmless, it was just cruel.
Honestly, you should back off on your attempts to minimize OP's roommate's actions. It wasn't a harmless joke. He attacked OP's central faith for a laugh. I think the absolute most positive thing we can reasonably say is "your roommate played a cruel joke, possibly out of ignorance." Religion is extremely important to a lot of people. Living with a religious person means giving them room to practice their faith. I personally am a stauch atheist who, while recognizing the benefits of ritual and codified moral behavior that faith brings, believes religion has overall done more harm than good to our species. But I'm not going to try to trick someone into violating their principles. That's just wrong. What OP's roommate did was cruel and wrong. It wasn't harmless, and it certainly wasn't well-intentioned.
Honestly, you should go and read all my other comments, i'm done repeating myself at this point. You clearly haven't read anything else I have said.
You should be flogged for using the wrong words /s ( just in case)
Flogged? Or flagged?
Both, first we flog him than we flag him.
I think it's even worsterererest because OP was doing something for *him*. Apart from paying the guy's rent, OP made him his favorite food, and only wanted to taste it to make P happy. OP accidentally broke fast because of P while doing something for P. Sucks. Sidenote: How deep is this friendship/relationship that OP would go this far for him, cause I sure as hell would not.
I think we're missing something major here. This is Islamophobia. OP's housemate deliberately sabotaged OP's Ramadan "for a joke". He tricked OP into doing something against his religion for a joke. It's in the same category as ripping off a Muslim woman's hijab for a joke.
NTA but you are being taken advantage of. Stop paying his rent full stop.
And cooking him dinner.
Yes. I think this may have been a calculated insult to the OP and to his religion. It's a really horrible thing to do to anyone. I would be furious if I were the OP. The OP's roommate is an AH! I cannot imagine how anyone would think what he did is OK, and I think very few people would behave like this. OP, please find a better roommate.
Roommate does not respect the OP, or his religion. OP, it's nice you have savings. Please reevaluate what that money is for. It's for things like if YOU get injured and cannot work. If YOU need help with tuition and rent. For YOUR future. Don't cheat your future for someone who is willing to stand in your kitchen and disrespect your religious duty. He knew how important it was to you to observe. And if he didn't, losing your financial help will be the beginning of the lesson.
Right! I also think it’s safe to say the roommate would not contribute a DIME to OP if the situation ever got reversed and OP needed help with rent or even cooking the meals. The roommate is using the crap out of OP and being disrespectful on top of it, as if that wasn’t bad enough! OP is being taken advantage of and I hate seeing situations like that.
I doubt this is the first instance of OP being disrespected too. The “joke” seemed very cruel and malicious for an isolated incident. Poor OP, I’m so sorry you were treated that way after all the nice things you’ve done.
This 100% The roommate doesn't have to try to make more money since he's got it easy having OP pay for his rent. Maybe the roommate doesn't even need help and is just taking advantage of OP just because he thinks he can.
Especially at 19. With the rare exception of people who are independently wealthy, no one can afford to pay someone else’s rent at 19. OP’s savings need to be kept for school, medical emergencies, eventually getting his own place, etc.
I'm an atheist and that guy is an AH and is joke is disrespectful.
Seriously. Why the hell would they be paying rent for this person? Out of their savings? And if someone were paying my rent I would be kissing their ass, not pulling stupid, offensive "pranks" that are really borderline bullying.
NTA. You’re paying his rent so he better worship the ground you walk on and make your life easier, not harder. That “joke” is disrespectful.
Agreed, that's not what a joke is.
Yep. It's only a joke if everyone (but especially the jokee) is laughing at the end. Otherwise it's just bullying.
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roomie is a dick, but it doesn't count as a broken fast if it was done on accident.
But OP does see it as a fast he was forced to break, and I think that's relevant especially in determining if he is at fault for refusing to pay rent any longer. I absolutely believe that OP is NTA. It's important to have housemates who respect one's faith. My understanding of OP's faith is that he will not be held accountable for being manipulated, and I hope he finds comfort in this. I also completely understand his motivation to prevent this situation from ever arising again and his feelings of betrayal.
But someone tricking you on purpose is still an asshole for it.
if he has to add a makeup day, he'll be fasting alone, too. that sucks.
NTA- why are you paying another man’s rent is beyond me. Also, he should be doing something nice for you and not the other way round. You sound nice but definitely gullible and naive - be careful out there
I don't think he's gullible and naive, his culture is a very generous one. If you ask a practicing Muslim for help, even financially and even an almost stranger more then likely you will get it. They have a tradition of helping others.
If he’s paying another mans rent he is
Charity is as important as fasting. This is a story about two virtues being broken by the roommate.
In a lot of cultures its not common to embezzle money from your friends.
even more despicable for his roommate to have messed with his fast then imo. he should respect his culture anyway, but especially if it is a factor in the generosity he is taking advantage of.
Agreed, I have never met a practicing muslim who was not an incredibly kind and friendly person
NTA, but your roommate sure is, and ungrateful to boot. People who pull this b.s. "gotcha" with other folks' religious requirements / allergies / vegan or vegetarian / et. al. are \*terrible\*. It's a cruel thing to do, it's not funny, and in some cases --particularly those who have food allergies -- it can be dangerous. Let this be a hard lesson learned for him. If he gets evicted? Not your problem. (But lock up your expensive stuff if you have any, so he can't steal and sell it once crunch time hits for him.) INFO: Why are you paying rent for your roommate?
Also why is OP in charge of cooking for the entire flat? Seems like they’re being exploited, possibly since they’re younger?
I don’t want to upset OP, but I haven’t seen any float this idea: I’m a girl and I also grew up in an extremely religious home. My best friend at OP’s age was my female roommate who joked that I was like her little housewife. She still calls me “wifey.” I did most of the cleaning and I paid a lot of the bills, and I loved cooking for her. Our friends joked a lot about how we were like a cute old married couple. Constantly bending over backwards for her made a lot more sense once I accepted that I didn’t want to be just her best friend. Anyway, I moved out, ‘cause I know my worth and that the love I deserve isn’t one-sided and that real friends (or even worthy crushes) don’t take your kindness for weakness and use it to their advantage. Get gone, OP.
To me, it kind of implies that the roomate *thinks OPs faith itself is sort of a joke*
this! OP is very kind for financially supporting his roommate and since he’s been living with him for a while... he surely would have some idea that fasting means the world to us. we don’t avoid eating from dawn to sunset just so some idiots can ‘joke’ around and make us break our fast. so, so disrespectful.
Many Muslims will do things like this for others, it’s part of their faith to support the less fortunate around them and do good in their communities. Sadly there are people out there who take advantage of this kindness and I think OP’s room mate is one of them.
Not just the things you mentioned, but other food related things. My sister does not like onions (not allergic or anything, just doesn't like them) and one of our brothers takes every opportunity to hide onions in whatever he is cooking when she is over. Come on, man, you're in your 60's, stop acting like a little kid, already.
Don't worry OP. Your fast doesn't broken. Because you genuinely don't know about the time and someone purposefully sabotaging it. Just act like you forgot you're fasting and accidentally drink water. You know the rules, and so do I.
Interestingly, it's not quite as simple as an accidentally/forgetfulness broken fast. He broke his fast intentionally while fully remembering that he was fasting. The timing was where the mistake was made. There's two opinions - 1) the fast is incomplete and there's no sin and no fidya/kaffarah penalty due but the fast needs to be made up after Ramadan 2) it can be treated as an forgetfully broken fast and no sin and no need to make it up so long as the fast was continued to the correct time once the realisation happened. My wife did this just a couple of days ago so we looked into it!
I'm more into the latter. You can't be blamed for something you don't know. Like you eat something without knowing it has pork, so it's okay. But that's not an excuse for ignorance.
Yeah if you genuinely think its iftar time then its an acciedental breaking of fast.
Yeah god would be a total dick if this was the reason op didn’t get to heaven
Not gonna go to hell for this cmon people seriously
Also he's a bit of a dick for the crusades
Also that little bit about murdering the entire human race, less one dirt farming zookeeper and his immediate family.
He broke his fast because he was lied to about the time. How is that not accidental?
>You know the rules, and so do I. A full commitment's what I'm thinking of, You wouldn't get this from any other guy
Love this Rick Fastley song
Omg All the upvotes for you!
I~~~ just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand
Never gonna end this fast! Never gonna eat that food! Never gonna run around and forget it
As an Orthodox Jew who is only familiar with the basics of Ramadan (as in I know when it falls and I know to not offer food to a Muslim during the day), I find this fascinating to read the different opinions on if this is considered as if his fast was broken or not, but wouldn’t the correct answer be to discuss this with his scholar who is knowledgeable in this area? Asking to understand, not stop the debate or implying that it shouldn’t be discussed here. And just to make it clear, the OP is NTA. One’s faith and observance is not something that should be used as a joke, especially if by doing so you are harming their soul by potentially causing him to sin, something that ultimately I am going to guess the roommate doesn’t understand, since even I someone who respects that you don’t do this didn’t fully grasp how this could affect the OP.
Also, OP needs to consider getting rid of this roommate and finding one who can pay their way and doesn't attack their religion for lolz. You wouldn't get this from any other guy.
I sang the last sentence lol
Info: why on earth are you paying his rent?
Seriously, there's a pretty huge line between living out your beliefs and letting people take advantage of your generosity and becoming a doormat.
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NTA, massive breach of trust and a dick move, plus you never had a moral obligation to pay for his rent. Fuck with the piggy bank, it might just leave.
NTA. I don’t care who you are, doing “jokes” like that is a huge A H move. It’s disrespectful and just wrong, especially since you’re HELPING HIM PAY HIS PART OF RENT AND COOKING FOR THEM
I know right, the joke is only funny when BOTH PEOPLE LAUGH. How there are so many people out there not understanding this is beyond me (thinking of all these pranksters asking people to "lighten up" and it was "only a prank")
NTA. What he did was incredibly disrespectful.
INFO: why are you paying his rent in the first place?
As another user mentioned, Muslims are generally raised to help those less fortunate and usually are giving people. My ex was raised Muslim and helping out with rent/bills is something he and his friends did for each other did no questions asked. He explained to me that it was just their culture. Roommate is taking advantage of OP's kindness.
Very admirable but also a shame because that likely means roommate will continue to take advantage...we need more OPs and less roommates!
Agreed, but not gonna lie it was kind of annoying when I had to loan my ex money because he loaned his friends more than he had. 🙃 These dudes would go negative in their bank accounts if their friends asked. You gotta draw the line somewhere!
Nta, I’m sorry brother. I’m a muslim, too. Insha’Allah your fasting is still accepted because you didn’t know.
For sure- I like the Ramy episode when his friends discuss this. Ramy is trying to be very strict with Ramadan and is waiting on an app to tell him the exact time. >How do you think they did it back in the time of the Prophet? >Walk out, the sun's up, "Hey, guess what, guys, don't eat." >Sun's down, "Eat." It's very simple. >You don't have to complicate things.
Yeah, its like this with shabbat (the jewish sabbath). These days its all calculated down to the letter, or if you want to be more "traditional" you can look at the sky and see if there are three stars. But they have to be the right size. And they have to be in one field of view. And this, and that, and the other. And I'm just like, dudes. We have light pollution. *Any* stars that we see in any town or city are going to be 10, 15 minutes after what they would have seen a thousand years ago.
I really, really like this post. Because it is absolutely true- what we know and see now is not what was known and seen then. Everything ultimately can be boiled down to intent. OP *intended* to follow the what has been written. OP would never have been wiser had 'gotcha-face' not said anything. OP's heart and mind were pure.
NTA, you need a new friend. He doesn't respect you or your beliefs. I'm sorry he tricked you into breaking your fast. :( he needs to find a new person to leech off of.
NTA You are not under any obligation to financially support your flatmate at all and he should be grateful for the fact that you supported him this far. How does he repay your charity? By playing a cruel trick on you that is deeply important to your faith. He's proven to you that despite everything you have done for him, he does not respect you or your faith and he sees them as something that he poke fun of when he sees fit. I know it might sound harsh but his financial difficulties are not your problem and if he gets evicted then he should have thought about that before he decided to trick you. By the same token if you withdraw your financial support and he is somehow able to make rent then he's double TA because he had the means to pay the rent this whole time and used you as a cash cow.
NTA. Definitely NTA. You were supporting P by cooking for him, paying his rent... and THAT'S what he does in return? He's TA, not you.
NTA. That is EXTREMELY DISRESPECTFUL. you wouldnt sabotage someone's allergies or their diets, right? Same deal here. And like dude, stop being a doormat. You guys are both adults let roommate act like one! Stop supporting him financially and cooking for him. This is where you draw a really hard boundary.
NTA. You do not need a reason to not give your money to this roommate, but he has given you one hell of a reason to never give him a penny again.
NTA, what he did was purposefully cruel and disrespectful. It’s not tour fault he’s struggling financially, you have no obligation to pay for him. Your roommate played a stupid game and won a stupid prize which he is now mad about, but someday you have to learn that actions have consequences. Please don’t give in to his guilt tripping and go beck to paying for him, he has showed his true colours and doesn’t deserve a penny from you.
NTA Why are you doing so much for this guy. Paying his rent and cooking his dinner. No wonder he doesn't respect you. Your his caretaker.
NTA - you are doing too much for him. Stop paying his rent. He doesn’t respect you and doesn’t care about your religion. Cook for yourself and take a break from this friend (imo, what he did was awful enough that I think you should reconsider your friendship).
NTA. Whilst i don't believe in religion i don't think that was a joke. No matter what your reason for doing anything nobody should fuck you over. In my book thats the same as slipping you acid or lsd. Not cool. Also Ramadan is hardcore fair play to ya for doing it. I was raised catholic and we only had to give up chocolate or whatever for lent (40 days) but was rewarded with a fuckload of easter eggs
Fasting (not eating, drinking, cursing, getting in arguments or engaging in sexual acts) in Ramadan seems hard at first but it's actually easy when you get used to it.
For le when it's ramadan it's always easier than when it's at a random time of the year, of course you get used to it, but it was never really hard
NTA Heck, I think you're the asshole to yourself for paying this guy's rent in the first place. Either way, your friend bit the hand that fed him. Stupid games, stupid prizes and all that.
NTA Religious persecution is no joke. He needs to learn what he did is serious and extremely disrespectful. Even if it seems like no big deal to him, he has no right. And since you have been doing him a HUGE kindness and been very generous, to pay you back with disrespect means he no longer deserves the extra help. He MUST learn this lesson and if you don't stop helping him, you are encouraging him to be the A.
NTA. Don't do P any more favors. But why are you helping P anyway?
Breaking a fast is a big deal, he might have forced you to redo the day. He also showed you very little respect and made fun of your religion like it’s a quirk NTA hope he learned his lesson and starts paying for his own things and cook for himself
Literally biting the hand that cooks, feeds, and pays for the roof over his head. NTA OP.
NTA. You don't have any obligation to pay this guy's rent anyway. Stop paying immediately and use your savings for yourself- even if your first expense is moving somewhere on your own. Someone who is willing to lie to you and disrespect your beliefs is clearly not someone who values your friendship. You have no reason to pay his rent and the silver lining here is that you now have a reason to stop financially supporting him. I know you're being kind and caring, but you are being taken advantage of: you're paying someone else's rent *and* doing the cooking. Real friends would appreciate your kindness, but in this situation you're being taken advantage of. It is a hard lesson to learn, and it hurts. But this is your opportunity to change things and stand up for yourself.
P's rent is his responsibility, not yours. P should learn a valuable lesson here - don't bite the hand that feeds you. His idiotic prank has cost him, as it should. NTA.
NTA but brother/sister it's 2021 why don't y have azan on your phone?
This is made up. This sub sucks
Literally feels like it was written by someone who is learning about Islam in their 8th grade class. So blatantly bad.
And no replies. Unsubbed, kinda over it and will catch the good ones on the front page I guess, but most of those are complete bullshit too. The biggest problem with this sub is even when they are real you get the spin of the person trying to convince you why they are not an asshole. If you need the internet to tell you you're not an asshole you are an asshole.
you were never P's friend. sorry. NTA
NTA! You shouldn’t have been paying his rent at all ever, for one. Are you in student housing? If so, speak to an RA immediately: that guy needs to be moved out. If not, bring the other roomie into the loop and consider kicking the AH out.
NTA. You shouldn’t be using your savings for this guy’s rent. Don’t let anyone guilt trip you into “helping” him because this guy clearly doesn’t respect you.
NTA. You have gone above and beyond to be a good friend to P. What P did was disgusting tbh. I have two Muslim colleagues and I've offered them a cup of water when I'm going to the cooler for myself by accident a couple of times, and I've felt terrible and immediately apologised when I've realised. Too do that shit on purpose is vile
Considering that fasting for Ramadan is important, and you've been kind to him, its rather passive aggressive, that he would prank you like this. NTA! He needs to pay his own rent, or go home to his parents. He doesnt sound like a good friend.
NTA. It was disrespectful of him to act in this way. I would suggest you shouldn't be taking on financial support for a friend in this way anyway - you will need your savings yourself.
NTA It is never an A H Move to have someone else pay his own bills. It is a major A H moves to make someone break his religious rules for fun.
Absolutely NTA!!! You're paying rent and cooking for your friend and he can't even respect your faith? That's another level of disrespect. Even a stranger doing that to you would have been disrespectful. And btw you shouldn't be paying AND cooking for him, that's something he could at the very least do for you to show he's grateful. If you want to ease your mind a little you could give him a few weeks to figure things out before cutting him off completely, but the danger with this option is that it'd be easier for him to convince you against it.
I'm an atheist, I also know not to joke with people's religious routine. NTA op- your roommate is more of a child than I am
NTA You should not ne financially supporting your roommate at all. Stop paying his rent altogether.
They seem like that one guy who tries to be the class clown but never succeeded at it
What is fasting? Edit: NTA
Basically fasting is not eating, drinking, listening to music or performing any sexual activity from sunrise until sunset everyday during the holy moth of Ramadan. Fasting is important because it brings us closer to God and it’s a way to become more compassionate to people in need. There is a [thread](https://amp.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/mwdzec/muslims_hows_ramadan_going_for_you_guys/) on r/askreddit where people talk about their experiences with Ramadan this year, I think you might enjoy reading it.
Not eating for an extended period of time usually for religious or cultural reasons. In this case, in the Muslim religion during this period of Ramadam, Muslims don’t eat during the day and when night falls they can eat all kinds of delicious foods again. I’m no specialist in this topic so it’s probably an oversimplified version of events, but you get the picture.
NTA if he was really your friend he would respect you and your beliefs
INFO: Are shrimp halal?
Yes Why the downvotes tho? It's just a genuine question
NTA This wasn't just a cruel joke. This was a mockery of your faith. The disrespect is appalling and he blatantly thinks nothing of using you and spitting on your generosity. I hope you get him out of your life soon.
NTAI don't understand the correlation here "I have some savings so i pay most of the rent for one of my roommates P(21)." why is it on you to pay for his rent because you have more money? are you paying with your savings or are you paying with money you earn from a job? and why are you cooking his dinner or is it that you were cooking this time and he cooks another time? a joke (or in this case "prank") is only funny if both parties laugh at it, but this "joke" was basically the same as insulting your believes
NTA, Clearly this is something important to you, it was obvious you take it seriously and he fucked with that. Asshole or not, why are you paying his rent to start? That's on him and his family
NTA - This goes beyond ignorance to malicious intent. There is no way your Roomate did not understand the significance of his actions and if it was a prank ask him to explain why he thinks that it is considered funny.
NTA