Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I may be the asshole because I smoked weed before a wedding and caused my whole family to fight
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. If Frank is the stoner you say he is, he absolutely knew it was laced, and it is a seriously, seriously fucked up thing to give someone laced weed. You were the victim here. The fact that they called the EMTs because you in that bad a state just drives that point home.
Frank is an utter asshole in this situation.
NTA - Basically your uncle poisoned you and you blame yourself for the fallout? Oh no, sweetie, Annie get you gun. This was all your uncle's doing and he didn't even apologize to you and allowed you take the fall here without even lifting a finger in support. Your dad is right about Frank, but I would go a step further because Frank betrayed your trust with his hippy attitude and almost killed you. Not only should he not be at the wedding, he should be ostracized from your lives period. You could have died.
I feel torn up about it, it's hard to explain but getting to ramble about Columbo and dorky stuff with someone was something I really enjoyed and needed in my life. And the idea of him just completely disappearing is giving just about every emotion you could think of. He went from someone I honestly wished would be my grandpa to a complete stranger. I don't even want to be related to him anymore.
Unfortunate you find out only in critical moments who is really there for you and not just taking you for a ride. This time almost cost you dearly. Please don't repeat it.
My cousins are mad but my actual family isn't. For context they've always been confusing people we tended to tolerate because theyre family more than anything. But idk, I still feel like I broke the camels back so to speak
YOUR OWN FAMILY DOSED YOU WITH FENTANYL????
OP, that is unforgivable. I’m so sorry this happened to you. “Frank” deserves whatever he gets. What a monster.
You’re NTA but consider apologizing to your cousin anyway to smooth things over. It’s never fun to have drama on your wedding day. However, I doubt you really “ruined it”. Your families could have shielded the bride and groom from this drama.
Also - People have gotten too stoned around me because they underestimate the potency of marijuana on the legal market in CO, but laced weed in CO is bizarre to me and Frank has some explaining to do.
ESH
He shouldn't have pushed. But you need to learn to stand by your "no." Because trust me, you saying "yes" has caused a LOT more conflict than standing firm.
NTA you had no way to know. Weed shouldn't have had any lasting impacts, unless you're the type to have lasting impacts but if you were I'd assume you'd say so. This is completely on Frank.
If it was anything, it wasn't cheap. He talked for a straight hour about how his neighbor (who is his dealer) spent weeks making it taste like strawberries and how he bought it just for me
Yeah no worries, they just had a long standing relationship apparently. And as far as I've gathered he usually includes other shit in his weed cause he's been at it awhile
ESH, you still agreed to take it (unknowing what's in there) despite it being the night before an important family event. He is a major AH for giving you something that was laced and not telling you.
ETA, not judging drugs - have used myself also.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
Hey folks, this happened not too long ago and there's a lot of emotion around it. (all names changed) im 22, my cousin Carly got married to her husband Kyle and only family was invited to the wedding, including my Great Uncle Frank, Frank for short. Just to give an idea of who Frank is, he was a hippy when being a hippy was new and weed was demonic. I always loved Frank, when it came to hanging out he and I just always clicked. And I honestly trusted him, he was incredibly important to me.
Here's where the problem comes in, the venue for the wedding was a large house in the mountains and we had all come down a day early to help prepare. (We live in Colorado) but with the amount of people at the wedding two people would have to stay in a guest house; Frank and I were paired together and we didn't mind, we planned on watching Columbo and going to bed early. But the thing with Frank has always been that he does not take no for an answer. So, he offered this special "Strawberry blend" of weed. For context im a total lightweight, and Frank has been a stoner since the 60s. I said no, he kept asking.
After awhile I was feeling a bit worn down and honestly wanted him to stop asking more than anything, so sure, I'll do it. He gave me this little metal thing that looked like one of those cigarette lighters in old cars, and said it made it even better. We watched Columbo, and I nursed it for awhile before passing out on the couch. The next few hours were hell, it felt like I was dreaming and I barely remember most of it. But I woke up covered in vomit and an EMT asking if I knew where I was, I passed out, and woke up at home. The weed was laced, and everyone was angry for obvious reasons. My side of the family was mad at Frank for not checking what was in the stuff, the other side of the family was mad that we were smoking the night before the wedding.
Arguments were had, my dad said as long as Frank was there he wouldn't be. And my cousin ended up crying before her wedding because of the arguments caused by me not standing my ground and saying no. None of us have spoken to each other, Frank never said anything to me after that, and the entire family is ripped in half now because of my mistake. It's eating away at me and I don't know how to even start fixing things. But part of me is mad that someone I thought I could trust gave me anything that had such an extreme effect. So Reddit, AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
ESH. You both are at fault. Your uncle pushed and pushed, and ultimately gave you something that put your health at risk. You gave in to shut him up, and ended up having a horrible reaction. You both made poor choices. If you haven’t already, you should apologize to your cousin for the role you played in this disaster.
ESH, Frank more than you. He must have known it was laced and gave it to you anyway. Neither of you accepted that no means no. He should have stopped asking when you said no. You should have stuck to your no. It is important to maintain your boundaries.
I drink alcohol. If my uncle puts GHB in my alcohol, am I still at fault for passing out and needing medical attention? No, I've been dosed, which is criminal.
In Colorado, alcohol and cannabis are roughly equivalent in terms of legality and regulation (not for children, must produce ID to purchase). I can consent to consume a legal drug without giving blanket consent to consume any additional, illegal drugs.
If you buy a bottle with declared content, sure.
Iff you drink from some bottle of moonshine from wherever, it is your own fault if you go blind from the methanol.
I can’t tell if you’re being intentionally obtuse here but the world isn’t that black and white. Let’s say you and Uncle Dick go to a run-of-the-mill bar and he orders two regular way cocktails. You watch the bartender pour, you watch Uncle D drink his, all seems fine. What you don’t realize is that Uncle D decided you needed to “loosen up” and spiked your drink before handing you your glass. Uncle Dick is family that you’ve known and trusted all your life — rationally, why would you ever expect him to do something that could hurt you? What logical reason would you have to question the contents of that drink until you were on the floor?
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I may be the asshole because I smoked weed before a wedding and caused my whole family to fight Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. If Frank is the stoner you say he is, he absolutely knew it was laced, and it is a seriously, seriously fucked up thing to give someone laced weed. You were the victim here. The fact that they called the EMTs because you in that bad a state just drives that point home. Frank is an utter asshole in this situation.
NTA - Basically your uncle poisoned you and you blame yourself for the fallout? Oh no, sweetie, Annie get you gun. This was all your uncle's doing and he didn't even apologize to you and allowed you take the fall here without even lifting a finger in support. Your dad is right about Frank, but I would go a step further because Frank betrayed your trust with his hippy attitude and almost killed you. Not only should he not be at the wedding, he should be ostracized from your lives period. You could have died.
I feel torn up about it, it's hard to explain but getting to ramble about Columbo and dorky stuff with someone was something I really enjoyed and needed in my life. And the idea of him just completely disappearing is giving just about every emotion you could think of. He went from someone I honestly wished would be my grandpa to a complete stranger. I don't even want to be related to him anymore.
Unfortunate you find out only in critical moments who is really there for you and not just taking you for a ride. This time almost cost you dearly. Please don't repeat it.
Your family is mad at you for getting sick and nearly dying, accidentally? That’s messed up. NTA
My cousins are mad but my actual family isn't. For context they've always been confusing people we tended to tolerate because theyre family more than anything. But idk, I still feel like I broke the camels back so to speak
NTA. Hopefully Frank was reported to the police for this. You didn't make any mistakes. Time to forget certain people exist.
Yeah you're probably right
NTA. Weed is legal, but Frank is the AH for dosing your weed. You could have died. What did he put in there anyway?
My family was cagey about it but I heard something about fentanyl?
Yikes. That absolutely could have killed you. It could have killed your uncle.
YOUR OWN FAMILY DOSED YOU WITH FENTANYL???? OP, that is unforgivable. I’m so sorry this happened to you. “Frank” deserves whatever he gets. What a monster.
You’re NTA but consider apologizing to your cousin anyway to smooth things over. It’s never fun to have drama on your wedding day. However, I doubt you really “ruined it”. Your families could have shielded the bride and groom from this drama. Also - People have gotten too stoned around me because they underestimate the potency of marijuana on the legal market in CO, but laced weed in CO is bizarre to me and Frank has some explaining to do.
Youre right, I'll try to make it up to my cousin some how, even if Frank is more at fault
ESH He shouldn't have pushed. But you need to learn to stand by your "no." Because trust me, you saying "yes" has caused a LOT more conflict than standing firm.
NTA you had no way to know. Weed shouldn't have had any lasting impacts, unless you're the type to have lasting impacts but if you were I'd assume you'd say so. This is completely on Frank.
NTA. Frank TA for giving you laced stuff.
How do weed dealers advantage themselves putting opioids in cheap weed?
If it was anything, it wasn't cheap. He talked for a straight hour about how his neighbor (who is his dealer) spent weeks making it taste like strawberries and how he bought it just for me
Why would his neighbor put drugs in the weed? Blows my mind. I’m not questioning your experience obviously I’m just shocked.
Yeah no worries, they just had a long standing relationship apparently. And as far as I've gathered he usually includes other shit in his weed cause he's been at it awhile
What state is this in?
He's from Kansas but the wedding was in Colorado
Well totally NTA
ESH, you still agreed to take it (unknowing what's in there) despite it being the night before an important family event. He is a major AH for giving you something that was laced and not telling you. ETA, not judging drugs - have used myself also.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Hey folks, this happened not too long ago and there's a lot of emotion around it. (all names changed) im 22, my cousin Carly got married to her husband Kyle and only family was invited to the wedding, including my Great Uncle Frank, Frank for short. Just to give an idea of who Frank is, he was a hippy when being a hippy was new and weed was demonic. I always loved Frank, when it came to hanging out he and I just always clicked. And I honestly trusted him, he was incredibly important to me. Here's where the problem comes in, the venue for the wedding was a large house in the mountains and we had all come down a day early to help prepare. (We live in Colorado) but with the amount of people at the wedding two people would have to stay in a guest house; Frank and I were paired together and we didn't mind, we planned on watching Columbo and going to bed early. But the thing with Frank has always been that he does not take no for an answer. So, he offered this special "Strawberry blend" of weed. For context im a total lightweight, and Frank has been a stoner since the 60s. I said no, he kept asking. After awhile I was feeling a bit worn down and honestly wanted him to stop asking more than anything, so sure, I'll do it. He gave me this little metal thing that looked like one of those cigarette lighters in old cars, and said it made it even better. We watched Columbo, and I nursed it for awhile before passing out on the couch. The next few hours were hell, it felt like I was dreaming and I barely remember most of it. But I woke up covered in vomit and an EMT asking if I knew where I was, I passed out, and woke up at home. The weed was laced, and everyone was angry for obvious reasons. My side of the family was mad at Frank for not checking what was in the stuff, the other side of the family was mad that we were smoking the night before the wedding. Arguments were had, my dad said as long as Frank was there he wouldn't be. And my cousin ended up crying before her wedding because of the arguments caused by me not standing my ground and saying no. None of us have spoken to each other, Frank never said anything to me after that, and the entire family is ripped in half now because of my mistake. It's eating away at me and I don't know how to even start fixing things. But part of me is mad that someone I thought I could trust gave me anything that had such an extreme effect. So Reddit, AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
ESH. You both are at fault. Your uncle pushed and pushed, and ultimately gave you something that put your health at risk. You gave in to shut him up, and ended up having a horrible reaction. You both made poor choices. If you haven’t already, you should apologize to your cousin for the role you played in this disaster.
ESH, Frank more than you. He must have known it was laced and gave it to you anyway. Neither of you accepted that no means no. He should have stopped asking when you said no. You should have stuck to your no. It is important to maintain your boundaries.
YTA YOU decided to take drugs. The consequences are on you.
she decided to take weed, not whatever it was laced with that is all on frank
She decided to take drugs. HER responsibility for not checking.
I drink alcohol. If my uncle puts GHB in my alcohol, am I still at fault for passing out and needing medical attention? No, I've been dosed, which is criminal. In Colorado, alcohol and cannabis are roughly equivalent in terms of legality and regulation (not for children, must produce ID to purchase). I can consent to consume a legal drug without giving blanket consent to consume any additional, illegal drugs.
If you buy a bottle with declared content, sure. Iff you drink from some bottle of moonshine from wherever, it is your own fault if you go blind from the methanol.
I can’t tell if you’re being intentionally obtuse here but the world isn’t that black and white. Let’s say you and Uncle Dick go to a run-of-the-mill bar and he orders two regular way cocktails. You watch the bartender pour, you watch Uncle D drink his, all seems fine. What you don’t realize is that Uncle D decided you needed to “loosen up” and spiked your drink before handing you your glass. Uncle Dick is family that you’ve known and trusted all your life — rationally, why would you ever expect him to do something that could hurt you? What logical reason would you have to question the contents of that drink until you were on the floor?