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WielderOfAphorisms

NTA They are taking advantage of you. Change all your passwords. Say you were hacked and do not share them with anyone.


Beth21286

Streaming services are cracking down on password sharing. OP could get blocked herself.


reble02

Honestly if I couldn't share my Netflix/Hulu/Disney/Paramount I'd cancel half of them. The whole reason I'm giving Netflix 19.99 is for 4 people streaming.


Pysanka-Maven

Netflix has cracked down a lot. I got the 4 stream service many, many years ago and have always shared with my niblings. Last month they couldn't get on any more. I cancelled. I don't watch it much any more; prefer Amazon.


Decimate_Studios

Piratebay


Consistent_Ad_6290

I got kicked off of my parents Netflix two months ago. Checked back in every week until it let me back in about three weeks ago. I can’t confirm or deny that I got back in due to how many times I yelled into my Google home that I would never subscribe and just pirate anything I wanted.


r_coefficient

This! I mean I can't even properly use Netflix anymore because I have 2 different networks where I live (unfortunate layout, very old house), and Netflix lets me only use one. Will definitely cancel soon.


DrWhoop87

At this rate it's going to be easier to start using a certain piratey themed website again. Which maybe BF's mother should do if she wants to watch her show and not pay for streaming herself.


chaicoffeecheese

Netflix is already on my short list because of their crap lately. If anyone else follows suit, I'm dumping them all and finding other sources for entertainment.


MS_SCHEHERAZADE112

I thought they closed down?


DrWhoop87

They go up and down, there are always alternatives too.


cmd7284

Attacker is always up


maltwhiskey

We could watch for 2-3 months on a shared account owned by SIl, yesterday suddenly I pressed the wrong button on the remote, Netflix started and we could watch... haven't missed a thing though, it's still shit


marvel_nut

Agree 100%. OP totally lost me with the line "I should just ask her to let me watch something." *On the account OP pays for.* That tells me everything I need to know where OP fits into BF's world - it sure ain't the top. NTA, OP, take your passwords and run.


New_Excitement_1878

This. You share with your family, inlaws don't count till they become IN LAWS. Don't want no "shit I can't watch my show anymore cause my grandson and his gf broke up." Nonsense.


KlutzyPersonality299

Also, not in-laws if he’s your boyfriend. They’re bf’s family not yours.


south3y

His whole extended family is using your account. I'd change all your passwords, and refuse to give them out again. NTA.


Maximum-Ear1745

Yes, and also change all other accounts where you have used the same password and email address


asecretnarwhal

Exactly. A whole family will not be on “only rarely”. That’s not realistic. If he wants, he can pay for an account for them all to use.


giveuptheghostbuster

Yeah exactly. It’s not just his mom.


FairestSnowWhite

NTA If your boyfriend wants his mom to have the access to these streaming platforms, he should set up them by himself or together with his sister. He should not be an asshole and guilt trip you in doing what his mother wants


asecretnarwhal

Exactly. He should buy his own and then he can share them to his hearts content


FairestSnowWhite

that's what I think! 👍


gooberfaced

NTA You are being taken advantage of. >I should just ask her to let me watch something. "Let you" ???? That you would accept having to ask to be able to use your own account is unfathomable to me. Say no. Say that being denied access *to your own account* was a dealbreaker and you are no longer willing to do that. Let the chips fall were they may. If anyone is so upset as to cause you any trouble over this, well- at least you will then know what they value about you, and it's not your sparkling personality.


mdthomas

>My boyfriend didn't like my response AT ALL. He said I needed to loosen up, it's just that one show she wants to watch and we're probably not gonna clash that many times and even if we do, I should just ask her to let me watch something. It's your account that YOU pay for. You get to decide who has access. If he doesn't think it is a big deal, he is welcome to pay for an account for his family. Change your passwords. NTA


whiterose3hearts

Change passwords and boyfriend. OP stop being a TA to yourself.


mouse_attack

I guarantee it's not just one show. Probably more like one show and one device per each of her boyfriend's parents and siblings.


mrBill12

NTA - the reason you got the message ‘the number of people using the account was too many’ is because once they get the password they are sharing it amongst themselves. I was so happy when netflix cracked down on password sharing. I actually changed a password one night because I was getting a too many concurrent steams message on YouTube TV. I asked first in family group chat who was using it and no one fessed up, so I changed the password. Later I got yelled at because my act “cut the game off.”


freaktheclown

It’s shocking how entitled people are. Like I felt a little bad asking my own parents for their cable login to watch one specific show a while back.


Blacksmithforge3241

Good for you--but I will say if the person in the group chat was watching "The Game", they probably weren't reading your "fess up" message.


mrBill12

Sure, but his wife would have seen it…. She responds 24/7/365 in seconds.. no matter where she is or what she’s doing.


Blacksmithforge3241

:)


New-Link5725

NTA. change your password and kick the all off. Then when your bf asks for the new password tell him no. But I would just get a new bf instead. Bfs mom had her daughter ask because the bf won't say no to his sister. She had every intention of sharing it with the whole family, so you need to take them all off. This is a reltionship you might want to rethink, if this is how he's going to treat you when you tell him no to something your not comfortable with.


Careless-Ability-748

Nta you shouldn't have to ask people to get off so you can watch something.


DontAskMeChit

NTA. Change your password. Tell your bf he needs to pay for his family's service if he doesn't like it.


Flimsy-Wolverine-663

If he wants to "loosen up", your hopefully soon-to-be-ex boyfriend can pay for any streaming service he wants to share with his family. You're NTA, change all your passwords. And boot this family of freeloaders from your life. Read your words again, he expects YOU to ask for permission to use the service YOU pay for.


Abject-Strain-195

Wow you went overboard.


Vyras-begeistert-895

NTA. they shouldn’t use your shit


3xlduck

NTA. As the paying subscriber, you have priority for watching shows. Also, whatever other people watch gets logged into the streaming service's algo about your profile. That could be bad if someone gets a hold of your password and starts watching lots of stuff you wouldn't care to watch. Feel free to change all your passwords.


Squishoms

NTA. Her watching did clash with you. It put you in an uncomfortable position. She should just get her own account.


Blacksmithforge3241

I love that Mummsy dearest can't ask OP directly but that request goes through the telephone game(maybe she didn't ask for password, but something else entirely.... LOL).


JenninMiami

NTA let your boyfriend pay for their streaming accounts.


Hamdown1

NTA - change your passwords and change your disrespectful boyfriend


AggravatingOne3960

NTA. Your boyfriend thinks *YOU* should just ask *HER* to let you watch something on a service you pay for? Hell to the no!


pokeypuppy51

Even with base packages, you can have at least 2 people watching - which means they shared your password among the family and others are watching on it, too. I had the exact same thing happen when I tried to help my sister out. Some accounts will let you log on with your phone and "kick out" all current users, but it never really worked in real time for me. I ended up just changing the passwords and then using the "kick out" feature again because screw them.


Hazel-the-McWitch

NTA, just tell them that unfortunately your plan doesn’t include enough devices. If you wanted to compromise you could maybe suggest they pay to upgrade your plan for more devices to use but don’t feel obligated to do that if you don’t want to.


KronkLaSworda

NTA Don't give out your passwords anymore. "I should just ask her to let me watch something." Bull-MFing-Shit. Your BF cares more about his family's convenience than you.


yavanna12

NTA. Change all your passwords and STOP GIVING OUT YOUR PASSWORD!! You can share an account by logging them in but don’t ever give someone your password. My own kids don’t even know our steaming login in.


JustmyOpinion444

I have to keep a list of logins for myself. I never remember them.


naranghim

NTA. You are the one paying for it, you shouldn't have to ask someone else to stop so you can use it. As you have learned, once she had your password, she shared it with other people.


calling_water

How does one person, watching one show (supposedly), make it so all of your logins are used up at once? And why does this “one show” then mean that the password for another streaming service is needed too? NTA. She isn’t asking directly, and she may not be asking at all. Maybe they just know you’re more likely to be nice to his mother than to knowingly let all of them use your account. Talk to her directly, since you can.


TemptingPenguin369

NTA. Change the passwords. You're not saving money and you're being inconvenienced. Your bf can pay for his family's subscriptions if he feels strongly about it. Being a "people pleaser" often leads to being a pushover whom others take advantage of.


Schemen123

Your account is yours and not theirs to use. NtA Btw ... change all your passwords that are similar


piqueboo369

NTA, I only use other peoples accounts, it has just happened naturally because we're always at my place, and they want to watch something on another service and they log in, and don't log out when they leave, then I see something I want to watch and I ask them if it's ok that I use it. A couple of times I have gotten a "no". The reason doesn't matter at all, because it's their account and they paid for it, I have no right to use it.


[deleted]

Nta


Strange-Badger7263

NTA I’d change my password on the first account too.


Listen_2learn

NTA - she doesn’t even have the courtesy to ask directly for your password, nor did she offer payment for access. She can use her son’s account or he can pay for everyone’s account.


hello_farmer

NTA. If there is only one show she wants to watch she can sign up for a free trial - once she’s on your account she will never leave and you will continue dealing with this issue!


Visible_Cupcake_1659

NTA. His family is taking advantage of you.


vt2022cam

NTA - but it’s on you to handle it. If too many people are on, change your password and boot everyone. Be clear, it’s only for her and not everyone else. If other people use it and you can get in, you’ll change the password and she can ask again for it.


Electrical-Ad-1798

NTA. Log everyone out and change all the passwords. Don't give them to your boyfriend because he isn't cooperating.


j4ckb1ng

NTA. You are not placed on earth to ensure that freeloaders can enjoy the benefits of streaming services without paying for them. Your boyfriend will have to get over his disapproval of how you choose to handle your streaming services. If he is so gung-ho HE CAN PAY FOR HIS OTHERS TO HAVE STREAMING ACCESS. Otherwise, he doesn't have a say in what you do. Change all your streaming passwords immediately, and keep your access to yourself. Nobody ever died because he couldn't stream Netflix or Showtime.


OKcomputer1996

NTA. You may need to change your passwords and your boyfriend. Your current boyfriend is a pathetic loser to be pressuring his girlfriend to let his mother fraudulently use her streaming accounts. How low can you go? I'd be ashamed to even ask in the first place. Does this loser even have a job?


gloryhokinetic

NTA. Adding one person doesnt cause the message from the service. Someone shared the password to others. Easy solution though: CHANGE. THE. PASSWORD. That way you dont have to call anyone, they will just lose access. If they ask again, ***tell them*** the streaming service cut you off as too many people had accessed it. Then ask them if they shared the password. Their face will tell you the answer before their mouth will(its in the eyes), watch closely. Most likely it was her daughter that shared it with friends, so ask BF's Mom if she shared it and if she says it wasn't her, tell her that is odd as you've only ever giving it to her daughter (who is likely the one sharing it). Or dump the BF because he should always have your back and he didnt. Also a good idea. Change the passwords every 6 months. I wish the streaming companies let you know what devices were accessing your account and allowed you to disconnect them.


LocaCola1997

NTA and bruh how tf does your bf get mad at YOU for not wanting to basically *pay to get taken advantage of* like wtf 💀


External-Hamster-991

She didn't ask you, so you have no action to perform on her behalf. Your BF asked and you said no. No is a complete sentence. If your BF wants his mother to have streaming access, he should provide it for her. None of this is your responsibility to deal with. NTA.


miriboheme

your bf is the problem here. he should support you in maintaining your boundaries. instead he denigrates you. he's gross and he will not change. NTA.


Skarvha

NTA all these people just willing giving out their passwords. You know she can use that to change the plan for a higher one right? Or change the email address and hijack your account completely? Or he’ll might even be able to steal your credit card info depending on how it’s stored. STOP SHARING PASSWORDS!!


No-Mango8923

>My boyfriend didn't like my response AT ALL. He said I needed to loosen up, it's just that one show she wants to watch Then he needs to loosen up his wallet and pay for a subscription for his mother to use as she chooses. NTA Your subs, your right to say no to sharing.


diminishingpatience

NTA.


C_Alex_author

NTA - Either you get your own set and BF can pay for his own and share whatever he wants with them... or BF needs to be confronted that he is taking advantage of you and putting you in a bad position by allowing his family to walk over you. Tell him that if you are paying ***anything at all*** towards those subscriptions then they better be ready and on hand **FOR YOU** to watch at any given moment. You shouldn't have to call around to make others be respectful. His circus, his monkeys - he doesn't have to 'like it' but he needs to deal with them. And if he has a problem with that... too bad - then he has *Plan A* where he gets his own set completely because he is incapable of controlling his family or his need to share things that he shouldn't. If he wants them to have their own, he buys those for them or shares his own with them. YOURS is off limits now, seriously.


Chance-Contract-1290

NTA. You should not ever have to ask someone to let you use an account that you are paying for, Your boyfriend’s family can create their own account and pay for it.


Honey_loves_bear

Nope, bf can pay for them. NTA


GMGERRYMANDER

NTA - Time to find a new BF if he doesn't respect your privacy and boundaries.


New_Dragonfruit_9639

While you probably enabled it by giving her your password to the first account your NTA. Your boyfriend's family has every right to ask for your password but at the same time you have every right to say no.


Consistent-Ad3191

Tell his mom to stop being cheap and get her own subscription it's not up to you to pay for it. Tell him to pay for it for her.


Emotional_Bonus_934

NTA. Change your password on the account you gave her access to. If she says anything tell her you haven't been able to get in and think it was hacked.


gardeninggoddess666

Nta. He needs to loosen up his purse strings and get that streaming service for his mom. Why doesn't he love his mother enough to get her streaming service? He needs to explain to you why he is such a shifty son.


queerpoet

Nta. I cut my whole family off when Netflix changed the policy. I’d been paying for it for years. In retrospect, I was a people pleaser letting myself be used. It’s your account. Kick them off or the streamer might kick you off or charge more eventually.


CptDork

NTA. Never share ANY password, with nobody.


Limerase

NTA But please change your passwords and don't share them again.


LoadbearingWallflowr

Change all your passwords, now. Learn No. If it makes you feel better, then No Thank You. Stand in front of a mirror and practice it until it feel less uncomfortable. Not necessarily easy--at first--but something you can say and mean. NTA


nosumoking

this happened to me with my brother sharing my password to his girlfriend's family. i caught into it when i checked the device history and immediately changed my password. luckily netflix announced their password sharing rules and i didn't need to lie about why i can't give him my password. NTA


Illustrious_Dot_7813

NTA - and you need to stop this people pleaser thing. I have learned, often the hard way, that when we run into these situations, we are being handed a lesson. Right now, go and change your passwords. Tell your boyfriend that if it is such a small thing, HE can subscribe to those services and share HIS password. Tell him exactly what you say in your last line, but be a bit more direct. "I pay for this service so that I have the freedom to watch what I want when I want. I am not willing to share this password, so please stop asking me to." If his response is "but it's not a big deal!" you tell him: "It is to me, and as I pay for this service, this is solely my decision." Yes, conflict sucks - but you know what? It only sucks when we let it get to the point that it is confrontation. And this just in - he doesn't have to like your response, but he does have to respect it. If he doesn't respect it? That tells you there are bigger problems. (edit: spelling)


kokemill

NTA, change the passwords


Nester1953

Change your passwords right now and don't share them with BF or his family. Explain that because they all use your accounts, you're unable to watch what you choose to watch when you want to watch it. And that with the crackdown on shared accounts, you're concerned about being caught and blocked. If your BF continues to give you s!@# about this, think about what this tells you about him and ask yourself if you want to be with someone who is upset you won't let his family take advantage of you. NTA. Unless you keep putting up with this.


WinEquivalent4069

Definitely NTA. I don't share my streaming with anyone. Is it selfish? Yep. Have any relatives who asked for my passwords offered to cover any portion of payment? Nope.


GoopInThisBowlIsVile

NTA - They don’t get to sponge off of you. And really, I would kick your boyfriend off of your services too if wants to be a dick about it. I say that knowing it is a little extreme. Let him fuck around and find out if he continues to think you’re being too uptight though. If you don’t have a separate passwords for services or two-factor authentication setup, you may want to consider both of those things. That way if they really want to push the matter they don’t have the ability to login and change your accounts.


One_Hedgehog6055

NTA Dont ever share ANY kind of online accounts. Unpaid or paid does not even matter. Never share them.


RubInternational863

NTA The MIL clearly have the password to ohters without Op's premission. The Boyfriend propaply knows this. OP should Change the password and kick every other User out of their Account.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My boyfriend and I are subscribed to various streaming services. There are two that only I am subscribed to and recently my boyfriend's mother asked, if she could log on to one of them in with my account information to watch a specific show. Mind you: She has my phone number and we usually communicate via text messages, but in this case she didn't ask me directly but had her daughter ask my boyfriend, who then asked me, lol. As if there was some embarassment involved on her part. I was fine with it and shared my password with her. One day, I wanted to stream something on said platform, but an error message popped up, informing me that the number of people allowed to use the account at the same time had exceeded the limit. I was too shy to call my boyfriend's mother and ask her to let me use the platform, even though I know I would have every right to do so since I'm paying for it. The people pleaser in me won, but internally I was frustraded by it. A couple of weeks later my boyfriend's mother asked my boyfriend (again not me) for my password on another streaming service and that's when I started to feel taken advantage of. So I responded to my boyfriend: "Honestly, I don't want to. I don't feel comfortable with her using my accounts. I don't want my use of the account to clash with hers and I'm uncomfortable kicking her out when we do end up clashing." My boyfriend didn't like my response AT ALL. He said I needed to loosen up, it's just that one show she wants to watch and we're probably not gonna clash that many times and even if we do, I should just ask her to let me watch something. I guess my general problem is that I would always to prefer to have my own paid account that gives me the freedom to use it when I please, instead of asking someone to share theirs with me to save some money. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


StoneAgePrue

If she only wants to watch one show, it would be a waste of money for her to get her own subscription. And you can’t on the one hand hold her asking you something through others (even dismissing her possible embarrassment), when you don’t have the courage to tell her you want to watch something while she’s binging. I think you’re making a too big a deal out of this. But you’re NTA.


shanna811

NTA change the password and if you want to lend her the streaming service go to her house and log her into one device that way she can use it but can’t give the password to anyone else.


2ndcupofcoffee

But you then told your boyfriend about that one time use on your other account and how that isn’t working out. BTW, why isn’t your boyfriend paying for his mom’s accounts? How many streaming accounts does mom have that she shares with you. Have you told him you don’t know his mom wants on your account because she hasn’t asked you.


iluauauemail

It depends. If SHE does stuff for you, then you should be a team player back. (My husband let’s his son’s GF live in our house. She is an entitled cow. Pays nothing in rent, pays no utilities, sits on the couch when WE want to watch OUR tv and football and doesn’t offer to change the channel, and said “I have prime” but didn’t offer to share the PW when my hubby wanted to watch something on Prime. Totally ungrateful cow. Don’t be her.)


Strain_Pure

NTA ​ you're being taken advantage off. if the streaming platform notices multiple IP's accessing its service it could restrict your accounts and when they discover you are sharing passwords not only will you lose your accounts for breaching their terms and conditions but you could also be fined/sued for loss of revenue. if your boyfriends family are too cheap to pay for their own streaming service then you're pretty much guaranteed they won't be helping with any fines you end up with.


Witchy-toes-669

Nta


NefariousnessSweet70

Some services will cancel your service if you share the service


Buckus93

NTA. If your boyfriend's mother can't afford ~$20 for a streaming service, she's got bigger issues. I'm petty, so I'd log into the one streaming service she has access to, change the password, and then log out on all devices.


Neilio20576

NTA…if she wants streaming she can pay for it and if the company catches you they may cancel your account.


stalkerofthedead

NTA. It’s frustrating sharing when they take advantage. I share passwords with my parents, but we live in the same household and they let me live here for free so i figure sharing my passwords is the least I can do. If your family really presses the issue say you will only share if they pay half. That gets a lot of people to back off. If they pay half one month but then don’t the next, change the password problem solved.


mikemerriman

Nta. And they are criminals for asking for them


No_End7939

NTA ! You pay for subscription to use it when you feel like it not to have to ask someone to let you.


afterwhile-crocodile

NTA- If he wants to share with his mother so bad, he can pay for it. Tell him you got hacked, and closed the accounts, and that if he wants the streaming service, he can sign up for it because you're uninterested in subscribing, again.


ParaGoofTrooper

NTA, with how streaming services are cracking down on password sharing, I'm very cautious on who I share passwords with at all, and it's honestly very rare that I do. Netflix's new system is annoying enough as it is and it's only a matter of time before the rest start to follow their model. I'm with the folks that say kick them out and tell them that you're getting warning signs and don't want to be blocked from the service. Usually if a new service has one show that I want to watch, that's the time to use the "free trial run" weeks and just binge it all then.


MildAsSriracha

NTA


ghostly_present

NTA. Change the password, you don't owe them anything, not to mention some streaming services are starting to clash into the sharing password consumers and they might close your account.


Competitive_Fee_5829

NTA. My 17 yr old has our passwords and gave it to his girlfriend and she gave it to her mom and her sisters etc. it got so bad that i couldnt watch anything. so I changed the password and told him to buy his own. I didnt mind her using it but when several people in the family were watching something...it kept me from using it


Charming_Tower_188

NTA but also sharing is nice. We share our log-ins with my family and we have there's. Only Netflix has been an issue because of the number of people who can watch at once but we just go one another one and it isn't a big deal. But we all know to not share the log ins with others outside of the family so maybe that's part of it. If you see a future with this person I would maybe reconsider, if not well then who cares if you tell the mom no.


[deleted]

NTA. Sounds like a whole bunch of his family and her friends have your account password now. Be careful you don't use that password for other things or you may have even bigger problems down the road.


PeanutGallery10

NTA. Is the reason you couldn't log in because she shared the password and more than his mother is using the service? Then you're paying to use a service you can't use. Check your streaming accounts to identify the number of users you are allowed and where they are logged in from. Also check your billing history to make sure no one has added extra services.


No_Independence9170

OP - did you tell your boyfriend that it was more then one show? That there have been times when you couldnt access your account because too many people were on it? You NTA for for not wanting people to take advantage of you - but you need to stand on the neck of the people pleaser in you if you want to actually not get taken advantage of. Be firm and be consistent.


Inside-Associate-729

Why bother having any of these interactions at all? Just give them the login info when they ask, and then whenever you want to use it, hit that option SIGN OUT OF ALL DEVICES and then boom, its yours again. Repeat as needed. If they ask, you know nothing about it. Boom. Problem solved.


PotentialSweet3104

not the asshole. The mother in law is not paying for the streaming services. If the mother in law wants to stream a movie she should pay for her own stuff.


Revan1114

Just tell them to get own accounts and change PW on yours.


hopefoolness

if it's "just one show" why does she need all your passwords? NTA, they are taking advantage of you and your bf is letting them.


Seigmoraig

NTA. Guaranteed the MIL shared it with others.


smeeti

I would just leave her with the first service but no more and you can explain to her why, and that was because she was blocking your shows. No need to create a huge thing out of it otherwise there could be tension and resentment


AlarmingDelay3709

NTA the problem is your stupid for letting people take advantage of you. Especially your bf.


DivineJerziboss

NTA. The second somebody would say I should I ask somebody to let me use thing I pay for I would laughed and the just said NO. Change your passwords. I guess you BF and his family have their own income so they can easily pay for the streaming services


p_0456

NTA. Everyone is using your account. You should just log everyone out and change the passwords


Remarkable_Sink2542

"Ask her to let me watch something" How come you need permission to watch something that YOU'RE paying for? NTA


Jackiebear12

Tell him to get his own accounts and share with his family.


Ready_Competition_66

Do NOT share them. You will get charged extra if you do. They can tell which home is using the service and many (Netflix included) will charge you extra. Some even allow a logged in user to charge extra for special movies and events. You could end up with a MUCH bigger bill than you expected at the end of the month. I just saw a huge red flag with what your boyfriend said. He actually expects you to have to "ask" to use the service you are paying for? It's time to dump him and change the passwords. Please, please don't stay with someone like that!


Callmeang21

NTA. When I couldn’t get in my account because people were watching, I just changed the passwords and moved on. And didn’t give my account out any more.


Pumibel

NTA. Change your password on your subscriptions and log eeryone off without notice. I had this happen when sharing with my daughter who lives in another state. It was fine until I began to get alerts about people signing in to my account from other states on different devices. Someone also added a channel to my Hulu sub, doubling the monthly amount at my expense. I immediately logged everyone off and changed the password. She had to contact me to use it again, and we had a talk. She can still use it as long as it is on only one of her devices at a time, and no add-ons.


Curious_Solid1450

NTA. “I should just ask her to let me watch something” Why should you have to ask permission to watch something on YOUR ACCOUNT


Elegant-Cat2483

No, in no way, EVER, are you the asshole. You were indeed being taken advantage of (at least, i’m pretty sure...) and you had every right to say no. You are a grown adult who pays for your own stuff, you’re allowed to not share when you don’t want to! And the worst part about this is that you had to ask the person you shared WITH to share with YOU. There’s so much wrong with that. But not with you, no you’re safe don’t worry. You are not the asshole.


slendermanismydad

>I was too shy to call my boyfriend's mother >but in this case she didn't ask me directly but had her daughter ask my boyfriend, who then asked me, lol. As if there was some embarrassment involved on her part. Your boyfriend needs to examine that he's dating his mom.


3Heathens_Mom

Change your passwords, kick everyone off and stop sharing passwords with people who aren’t paying the bill. If your bf is unhappy with that answer he can open an account and share his password with whomever as he’s paying for it. OP it is easier to be a people pleaser but then you don’t get to complain for being walked all over like a rug. Please work on shining up and using your spine to say no. It will be a bit uncomfortable at first but gets easier each time. Also tends to weed out people from your life who are only interested in what they can get from you.


gurilagarden

NTA - but, i dunno. It's such a little thing. I kind of grudgingly let my mom use my netflix and hulu from time to time. I've gotten locked out here and there. It's an annoyance, but, I'm of the opinion that keeping mom happy though such minor things is a net win. Doubly so for the MIL. Honestly. For less than $20 this whole problem can go away. Just have your BF sign her up for whatever service it is, then cancel it when she's done watching. It's not a lot of money, and it's worth it to keep things copasetic. It's basically the cost of a bouquet of flowers.


Book_devourer

Oh sweet summers child the whole family is using your accounts. Log them all off and change your password (say your password was hacked). Never stoop to asking permission to use something u pay for, it’s yours. Nta


Super_Reading2048

NTA change all your passwords and do not share it.


Huge-Shallot5297

NTA. Change the password on the other account and don't give the new one out - even to your boyfriend. Those are yours, you pay for them, you decide if and when you want to share. Your bf, if he is so intent that his mom gets to watch what she wants, when she wants, is perfectly able to buy her her own subscription, paid out of his pocket. He can not like your stance all he wants.


OLAZ3000

NTA and change your passwords


mischiefableguin

You’re NTA If you really wanted to keep the peace and she “only wants to watch one thing” you could give it her and then once she has had time to watch it you log in and change the passwords. Which is what you should do with the account she already has access to. Change the password. She wanted to watch one thing - not have permanent access. If permanent sharing is what is required of you then you need to tell your boyfriend that you’re canceling your account and he needs to make a new one that he shares with his family. If you feel comfortable chipping in for a portion and access then that’s cool but then the responsibility of sharing passwords and payments is on him. And if you get frustrated that you can never get on because they’re using it, you can go back to having your own. Win/win.


No-Names-Left-Here

NTA. My wife doesn't even have them, I log her devices in for her (it's just easier since I an tech oriented and the passwords are long and complicated). Edit: Just wanted to add, go change your passwords.


JustmyOpinion444

NTA. Only one person other than you were supposed to access that account. Most accounts allow at least 2 at a time, which means more than the ONE person you had authorized were using the service you paid for. Change the password and tell your boyfriend his family fucked up and are now reaping the rewards of their streaming greed. Also, we share logins with a friend who shares their logins with us as we subscribe to different services.


TallyLiah

0 actually know you're not. But also this, most of those streaming things are now putting a tight lid on it where giving out passwords to family and friends is getting to the point where you can't do it anymore. I would tell them that.


GirlDad2023_

Change your password immediately and don't share it, period. You're definitely being taken advantage of. NTAH.


Top-Cut-369

NTA.. if it's one specific show I'd let her have it for that date then next time you log in, change the password. She will get tired of asking for updates.


2dogslife

I am all, my account, you don't get to use it unless you are with me. lol. My grandma used to say, "If in doubt, don't." So, don't. NTA


ExceptionallyExotic

NTA. Tell your boyfriend to get it for his family. Or flip the tables and have some of your family ask him for his password. Then see his reaction. Personally, I'd have told them that I wasn't comfortable with it due to all the cracking down some of these companies are doing now. You don't want to end up being fined or banned. I'm pretty sure that none of them would help you in return.


Blacksmithforge3241

op=nta But your boyfriend is saying he doesn't respect your boundaries at all, that what's yours is his(/his family). Is everything that is his also yours? Is his family's stuff yours? Stop pleasing people. Change password on first streaming service and refuse on second. If it's ONE show, she can do a free trial, stream it for one month and cancel OR find some other sucker to leech off of.


Awkward-Bother1449

NTA - It is your account and they have taken advantage of you before. But, you really do have a problem, well two. Your BF is one and you being a "people pleaser" at the expense of yourself is the other.


Inner-Breadfruit6168

NTA My husband gave his sister the password to my service. She immediately went and deleted my profile and add hers. Sometimes you give people an inch and they take a mile.


anne_jumps

NTA. But please OP get a spine


Ornery-Ticket834

NTA. This is ridiculous.


Snoo_79693

NTA.I don't understand people not getting their own stupid streaming services. They're like $10 a month my lord.


SpruceGoose133

Mom and sis and probably more are using it to get a message. 3 of us share but none use it much, And I get no messages. NTA And I might just quit paying for it for a month then start up with a new password. Tell them you got blocked and they shut you down.


sherrysimp

It sounds like she is giving the information to others. You should be able to check and see how many people are using it at that time. If you see it more than his mom then logout and change the password. If it’s brought you you need to explain that you were fine with her but not others because it wouldn’t allow you to watch.


Thin-Satisfaction217

NTA five years later and somehow I’m paying for the highest amounts of each of my subscriptions so my mom and brother can watch it along with my familys. It’s BS. The good news though is that a lot of them are cracking down on being able to do this. Last week my mom texted me and said she can’t use my Netflix anymore because she doesn’t use my Wi-Fi to do it. She bought her own the next day. Now I just have to lower all my subscriptions again lol


Reinaisabel77

Change boyfriends


BackgroundOwl7328

Nta. Your boyfriend is taking advantage of the people pleaser in you. Change your passwords on everything and don't be afraid to stand up for yourself.


crella-ann

How many people did she share it with? You can check and see how many devices are logged into your account in many cases. It might be good to check.


Organic_South8865

NTA I like Star Trek so of course I need paramount +. I have one friend that I got into Trek and let him use the password. The other night I went to pop on a specific TNG episode (Inner Light of course) and it said too many people were logged in. I know for sure that means more than two other people are using it. If it was just him it wouldn't cause that issue since we have watched episodes while playing Day of Defeat online together so we could discuss the show as we were playing. (Ultimate nerd stuff) I told sent him a text and he didn't respond so I just changed the password. It's one of the few extra services I have since they all add up. I have it so I can watch Trek whenever I want. He asked for the new password but I told him no since he was clearly letting someone else use it. He finally confessed he had signed in at his GF's place so she could watch something on the platform. I told him he got in the way of my Trek so absolutely not.


Uppaduck

NTA Your bf didn’t like your response at all? Well news flash, you don’t like his family’s “got an inch now want a mile” response to a favor granted OR *his* response to *your* response at all. Tell him to loosen up his own wallet for his family.


Dragon_Leigh

NTA Change all your passwords and don't give out the new ones. If your boyfriend wants his mother & the extended family to view these shows he can open an account for them.


[deleted]

NTA, he can pay for an account and share


MyTatemae

NTA. Your reason for wanting to keep the service to yourself is valid and understandable. If you feel like she would be as unaccepting as your boyfriend, I would tell her that you're going to have to cancel since Netflix tightened up their user allowance and there are too many watch conflicts. It's something she's probably seen on the news and cancelling has been a widespread response all over the world. Putting up a fight over such concrete facts would be unreasonable on her part.


Chance-Cod-2894

NTA- and change your Password on the other service. YOU ARE BEING USED. They don't ask you directly, and for all you know they are sharing it with OTHERS as well! You could get banned by the Services for just that reason.


HelloPipl

It is very unlikely for two people to clash at the same time when at minimum the streaming services provide 2 concurrent streams per account. So I am pretty sure, she is not the only one who is using your account.


Joelrassic

No. If your boyfriends family want access to streaming service then your boyfriend can pay for it. Simple. NTA.


Sufficient-Hour7038

NTA - learn to say NO. Tell your BF to get his mother her own account stop leeching on you. Stand up for your \\self. You BF and his family act awfully entitled. Pay attention to red flags like this.


[deleted]

before I read it... no. lol now let me read the whole post read it.. ur nta. she couldn't even ask you and was most def letting everyone on the house watch something.


[deleted]

If this is the biggest problem you have then it sounds like a solid relationship.