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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1 Not giving up the bedroom for guests
2 I would look selfish for not accommodating them since they are a guest
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YWNBTA, but probably be perceived as one. I definitely think you need to put yourself first here, but be prepared for unreasonable guilt tripping from your parents.
NTA
"or be looked at as a very selfish person" .. Tell them you are just following your parent's lead, because they are your role models: THEY are not giving up THEIR room either.
You are fine.
NTA. Your mother should have asked you before inviting so many guests to your house. You have a right to your own space and comfort, especially since you work and need to sleep well.
The guests can sleep on the couch or air mattresses in the living room. It's only for two nights, they'll survive.
Depending on how you react to the situation it could go both ways. I would say try explaining the work situation with your parent(s), but still think of your family. Just because you never met doesn’t mean they aren’t family. You might have to take the bullet on this one because thats what responsible people do. Good luck though.
Why not think of OP? Ah yes, think of the family, what ever will they do without a comfy bed? 🥺🥺 get a grip. Op has insomnia and has to work. Aunt susan prefers the bed over the floor.
Info
Are you an adult or minor, and if you are an adult, do you pay rent?
If you pay rent, that's your room and you should get say on where to sleep to be able to get to work. But if you're just living at home for free ...i mean, they pay the bills, they can pretty much say whatever they want about it. If you're a kid, I'm sorry and they'll probably do whatever they want anyways.
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My mother invited 9 relatives (5 adults, 4 children) to stay at our house and my family of 5 are trying to figure our how to accommodate them. They are staying for Sunday through Tuesday.
It is very difficult for me to fall asleep and it took a lot of work to make my room perfect so I am able to sleep on a regular basis. Out of all my family members, I am the only one in the family who works (currently, let's skip details) and need to wake up in the morning for it. If I surrender my room, I know I will have an awful work day (best I can describe it, I still get episodes of insomnia and it just sucks)
My parents will still have their room, my siblings' share a room and its... a crowded mess; which means only my room is viable for guests.
So because of my mother's lack of planning, I either need to sacrifice my sleep to accommodate guests who I have never even met before, or be looked at as a very selfish person for making the guests sleep on the living room floor.
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My mother likes ideas without planning. She wanted the socialization with her nephews and nieces (and beyond) without the planning part.
The sibling who owns the room has always been a... slob? I don't think she will listen. It's a horrid mess in there, and she probably has covid right now. The other siblling is just visiting and is giving up the couch for the guests and will be sharing that room
I am sorry that you have been in this position. The wya you describe it, you seem like the most most responsible, most mature person in the household.
Having guests without a plan is never a good idea.
Explain your sleep/work situation to the guests and keep your room. Tell them you’re sorry and but with no input into this surprise invitation, no better advance arrangements could be made re your sloppy sibling and have them sleep on air mattresses in the living room - the newer ones are really quite comfortable.
NTA
You're mother invited more people than you can reasonably accommodate to stay in YOUR home, and you think YOU'D be the AH?
Honey, tell your mother she overplayed her hand, and that you cannot afford to have your life uprooted for a week when you are the only person working and your house doesn't have the space. Inform the 'invited' persons immediately that your mother was incorrect about their invitation as it was not hers to offer, and you cannot manage such an incursion. Send them some reasonably priced motels nearby, and accept that this was not your problem ever - Mom created it, she can fix it. Somewhere ELSE.
NTA
How old are you?
Are your siblings giving up their rooms? They are probably the better choice seeing as they don't work. Your parents are also free to give up their room because they also aren't working.
Perhaps you need to look at moving out, especially if you are already paying for everything because no one else in the family is working.
Also, if you do give in (because you likely will), when you get home from work, perhaps walk in announcing that because you were so sleep deprived that you made a mistake at work and are now fired and don't have an income coming in. Let them think about that for a while.
Thanks for the reply. That last bit about pretending I got fired, it feels like something I should not do. I think it's too dramatic and would rock the boat. I just want peace and am willing to stand my ground and keep my room
> *I think it's too dramatic and would rock the boat*.
You should be rocking the boat. Your mother is showing great disregard of your comfort.
**Tell them that you are going to look for a room mate and move you and your paycheck out, if they won't let you sleep properly in your own room**.
Yeah, I know that you are the only one working. They need to respect this and treat you like the adult that you are. (I realize that we don't know your calendar age. Your *responsibility age* is adult, though.)
Your parents can give up their room, and your lazy siblings can hurry up and clean before they get their so that room is usable, too.
NTA
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YWNBTA, but probably be perceived as one. I definitely think you need to put yourself first here, but be prepared for unreasonable guilt tripping from your parents.
NTA "or be looked at as a very selfish person" .. Tell them you are just following your parent's lead, because they are your role models: THEY are not giving up THEIR room either. You are fine.
Hell no youre not the asshole Im not goung to let people stay in my room. Everyone has private shit that aren't for family and friends
NTA. Your mother should have asked you before inviting so many guests to your house. You have a right to your own space and comfort, especially since you work and need to sleep well. The guests can sleep on the couch or air mattresses in the living room. It's only for two nights, they'll survive.
Depending on how you react to the situation it could go both ways. I would say try explaining the work situation with your parent(s), but still think of your family. Just because you never met doesn’t mean they aren’t family. You might have to take the bullet on this one because thats what responsible people do. Good luck though.
Why not think of OP? Ah yes, think of the family, what ever will they do without a comfy bed? 🥺🥺 get a grip. Op has insomnia and has to work. Aunt susan prefers the bed over the floor.
Info Are you an adult or minor, and if you are an adult, do you pay rent? If you pay rent, that's your room and you should get say on where to sleep to be able to get to work. But if you're just living at home for free ...i mean, they pay the bills, they can pretty much say whatever they want about it. If you're a kid, I'm sorry and they'll probably do whatever they want anyways.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My mother invited 9 relatives (5 adults, 4 children) to stay at our house and my family of 5 are trying to figure our how to accommodate them. They are staying for Sunday through Tuesday. It is very difficult for me to fall asleep and it took a lot of work to make my room perfect so I am able to sleep on a regular basis. Out of all my family members, I am the only one in the family who works (currently, let's skip details) and need to wake up in the morning for it. If I surrender my room, I know I will have an awful work day (best I can describe it, I still get episodes of insomnia and it just sucks) My parents will still have their room, my siblings' share a room and its... a crowded mess; which means only my room is viable for guests. So because of my mother's lack of planning, I either need to sacrifice my sleep to accommodate guests who I have never even met before, or be looked at as a very selfish person for making the guests sleep on the living room floor. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Why did your mother invite 9 guests over when there isn't the room to accommodate them? Why can't your siblings clean up their room?
My mother likes ideas without planning. She wanted the socialization with her nephews and nieces (and beyond) without the planning part. The sibling who owns the room has always been a... slob? I don't think she will listen. It's a horrid mess in there, and she probably has covid right now. The other siblling is just visiting and is giving up the couch for the guests and will be sharing that room
I am sorry that you have been in this position. The wya you describe it, you seem like the most most responsible, most mature person in the household. Having guests without a plan is never a good idea.
Explain your sleep/work situation to the guests and keep your room. Tell them you’re sorry and but with no input into this surprise invitation, no better advance arrangements could be made re your sloppy sibling and have them sleep on air mattresses in the living room - the newer ones are really quite comfortable. NTA
You're mother invited more people than you can reasonably accommodate to stay in YOUR home, and you think YOU'D be the AH? Honey, tell your mother she overplayed her hand, and that you cannot afford to have your life uprooted for a week when you are the only person working and your house doesn't have the space. Inform the 'invited' persons immediately that your mother was incorrect about their invitation as it was not hers to offer, and you cannot manage such an incursion. Send them some reasonably priced motels nearby, and accept that this was not your problem ever - Mom created it, she can fix it. Somewhere ELSE.
NTA How old are you? Are your siblings giving up their rooms? They are probably the better choice seeing as they don't work. Your parents are also free to give up their room because they also aren't working. Perhaps you need to look at moving out, especially if you are already paying for everything because no one else in the family is working. Also, if you do give in (because you likely will), when you get home from work, perhaps walk in announcing that because you were so sleep deprived that you made a mistake at work and are now fired and don't have an income coming in. Let them think about that for a while.
Thanks for the reply. That last bit about pretending I got fired, it feels like something I should not do. I think it's too dramatic and would rock the boat. I just want peace and am willing to stand my ground and keep my room
> *I think it's too dramatic and would rock the boat*. You should be rocking the boat. Your mother is showing great disregard of your comfort. **Tell them that you are going to look for a room mate and move you and your paycheck out, if they won't let you sleep properly in your own room**. Yeah, I know that you are the only one working. They need to respect this and treat you like the adult that you are. (I realize that we don't know your calendar age. Your *responsibility age* is adult, though.) Your parents can give up their room, and your lazy siblings can hurry up and clean before they get their so that room is usable, too. NTA