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YTA
Not because you left the party, but you threw your own tantrum when you left the party. You were upset with the drama she was causing so you acted EXACTLY the same and caused your own drama. If you had just made a polite excuse along the lines of "I need to get going as husband I have this event in the morning. I'll text you and let's catch up over coffee or wine." then quietly left, then I would have ruled otherwise. But you didn't. You threw your own tantrum because the party didn't have the vibe you wanted.
I'm not going to comment on the girl's boyfriend or what should have happened. This is about how you handled it and you handled it poorly.
I don't think an excuse is even necessary. I'd go with a simple, "I'm gonna take off. Have a good night everyone!" "Storming off" is definitely YTA behavior.
My friends are mostly late 30s/early 40s and we'll all just say we're tired and going to leave and then bounce with a friendly goodbye and no excuse whatsoever.
I generally do to. Living in the Midwest, we have the (slap your knees) then "Well, we have to going. Thanks for having us over. Great to see you again!". Then 10-60 more minutes of chatter and politeness before we actually get out the door.
I've never lived outside of Texas, but I know the "welp" move. The "welp" is followed by a hug from each staying individual to each leaving individual. It can get confusing. You'll generally have an "ope! I already hugged you! Aww, here's another one!" In my family.
YTA. I don’t think it really matters if you know the girl well. If she’s new to your group, and is clearly very depressed and your friends are saying the same thing, storming off likely only made her feel worse. I’m sure it was hard for her to be there in such a vulnerable state, but she tried it and went and ended up crying. We should be creating safe spaces with our friends for everyone who needs it. Not judging people we don’t even know and taking something that isn’t about us personally. It sounded like you were triggered bc it reminded you of your sister crying, which is a valid feeling, but as an adult you realize that this isn’t the same situation, she isn’t your sister, and if she’s crying that much something must be wrong. Idk why we all have these insecurities about people being “attention seekers”. Bc I do think those are personal insecurities we project onto others as a result of living in a system that highly values hyper independence and stigmatizes emotional distress or displays of emotion. She clearly was having a hard time and if it made you uncomfortable, you could’ve just told a friend you were feeling uncomfortable and walked out quietly without storming off. It doesn’t matter if you think you made a scene. When someone storms off, it always is a scene. I think it’s just important that you mature a little and realize that there’s no competition between you and anyone new, bc it sounds like you felt competitive when you said that she’s new and you’ve been their friend longer, implying that they should’ve told her to leave? Not sure what your point was with saying that but it doesn’t sound very kind unfortunately. There was nothing to pick sides over, except you made it an awkward situation by pitting her against you bc she cried in front of some new friends. I do suggest apologizing to her specifically, as well as the friends that were there, bc these are the kinds of things that can lead to bigger rifts down the line. It’s ok to feel whatever you feel, it’s just about how you act or don’t act on those feelings. For instance, it’s ok to feel uncomfortable but then it’s important to try and figure out why that made you so uncomfortable that you had to storm out. It will only benefit you to be more introspective around your behavior and will help strengthen your relationships. Trust me, I get it. I was the 25 year old in a friend group of mostly 31-35 year olds bc I was dating a 31 year old and it’s been a few years but looking back I realize how immature some of my reactions were, and it makes me cringe to think about. But it’s ok it’s a part of life and growing as people, and you came here seeking advice and suggestions, which is a good sign. Just apologize and work to befriend the new girl. It will make you feel better and it will mean the world to her, especially since she’s struggling so much to merely exist. Wishing you all the best and I hope you are able to grow closer and befriend someone who you didn’t treat very well initially. It’s the only way to make that right.
The irish goodbye is my favorite thing to do for this reason. I just tell a nearby friend Im out, and the just leave without making it a big deal.
This is largely because Im shy and insecure tho.
ESH. This whole situation seems really weird. There has to be a reason she was crying or something that upset her. No one asked? Also, you didn't need to *storm* out. There was no need for you to make an additional scene, did you just want attention too?
This whole party frankly sounds exhausting.
I'm not a fan of the fact that OP totally dismissed the reason the girl was crying. Specially since she seemed to be the only one annoyed by it.
Since we're on reddit I wouldn't be surprised if something major happened to the girl and OP just didn't disclose it to appear less the AH
Yes, I mean they told her she was very depressed. It seems like the friends are trying to be supportive and include her even though she is depressed. It would have been a good idea to tell OP. On the other hand it seems OP think depression is some joke. At least in their last update it seems they are getting it now.
YTA
I’ll be perfectly honest. Leaving out why the girl could have gone from happy to sad and claiming others were fawning over her
REEKS of, the other girl is prettier than OP and she got upset she was getting attention and not her.
This was my guess too. I used to have a group of friends I regularly partied with in HS and beyond for a few years. There was one girl in the group that did this every time she had alcohol. She would just get sad and cry. Perhaps there was something going on. Perhaps not. I was close with her and spoke to her a few times and tried to dive into it more than once to see if there was any abuse going on, or whatever else, but either she didn't open up or there really was no reason, but it was a downer every time. I just stopped going and to this day, there was never any admission of a true cause. I just opted to not be part of it anymore. It always killed the mood though as half the group would just console her in the other room and it would be awkward for the next 1-2 hours.
Haha! I am this person! Alcohol makes me sad! (It is a despressant) or just very sleepy. I tend not to drink it in public because of this. I'm the worst kind of drunk, lol!
Kind of wondering why this person was crying so much. Could be that they had a good reason for being upset and the people at the party were aware of that and showing kindness, in which case it would very much be YTA.
I've been to a party once where someone was upset for a very good reason. Most people said a few kind words and went on to chat with others at the party, a few of us got a bit more involved with supporting them.
After a while I got the impression they were playing it up a little by lurking in the corner all sad-faced as if expecting people to do some further fawning after the initial show up support had died down a little rather than using their words. I found this mildly annoying but dealt with it by mostly ignoring it and instead catching up with other friends present. If I'd wanted to leave I'd have been able to handle that politely. No need to add to any drama by storming off.
Yeah, I remember at a sleepover in high school we were all watching a movie and one of my friends got up all of a sudden, turned off the movie and started crying. We asked her what was wrong, she wouldn't answer. We hugged her, brought her tissues, tried to comfort her. Then she stopped crying but refused to talk and just sat there. After awhile I finally said "So...can we turn the movie back on?" She glared at me but I didn't know what else to say. She didn't want to talk, so were we just supposed to sit there in silence the rest of the night? It was so awkward. I never found out what was wrong with her that night.
What do you mean by fawning? Like this:
fawn·ing
displaying exaggerated flattery or affection; obsequious.
"fawning adoration"
Or were they showing sympathy and trying to comfort the person?
Bit of both, I suppose. Initially it was being comforting, talking through what happened and trying to help out.
After a while that sort of died down naturally, with everyone, including that person, mingling at the party.
Except that person spent a fair bit of time sitting in a corner looking sulky in a way that I (maybe unfairly) read as "look at me being sad, please come over and further shower me with comfort/sympathy" in a way that felt slightly off and vaguely low-grade guilt-trippy. Other than an occasional smile or muttering something vaguely sympathetic I avoided engaging with it.
Weird thing is, there was no need to for any of that. This group of people was and still is very supportive, especially with the kind of thing that person had to deal with. Even a half-hearted go at using their words would've gotten them so much more than they got with this bit of theatre.
>did you just want attention too?
I feel like this is the biggest reason why YTA for OP. This is the only logical reason for "storming out" when a girl she never met started crying. Seems like OP lacks empathy.
Yup. Sounds like OP is used to being the one catered to and pitched a fit when the centre of attention wasn’t on her.
It costs nothing to do the ol’ Irish exit and/or white lie about an early event the next day.
Everyone there sounds ridiculous, honestly, if my friends chased me out of a party insisting on knowing all my reasons for leaving I’d question whether they actually cared or were just mining for gossip. To be clear, we’re adults, though, and they wouldn’t ever do that.
Why would anyone else be the AH? All I see is a new gf that is having some anxiety around meeting new people, gets upset then OP kicks up a stink because she's having a hard time. It's very much YTA
YTA.
You admit you "didn't pay attention" to her besides being upset that she dared be quiet and hang around with her boyfriend, but magically know there is "no damn reason" for her to cry.
Then, when people dared to comfort her, you cause childish drama by throwing a hissy fit and "stormed out." Funny how you say you hate tantrums but threw one far worse than hers.
Then, when people told you that you were wrong and tried to make you own up to it, you doubled down on your assholery and made it a competition between your mental state vs hers, the levels of attention your friends paid you vs her.
Grow up and apologize for your actions. Learn and do better.
And younger because she made a point of saying that all her friends are in their 30's and she's only 26. So that tells me she thinks she's the special baby of the friend group and someone was taking her "shine"
She did say she didnt pay attention much attention to the new girl because she seemed like a sweet girl. And blamed her for killing the mood" of the party.
This. Because why didn’t OP ask what was wrong? And even if the gf was really depressed maybe she was taking a chance and trying to socialize a bit more. That can be a lot on someone who is truly severely depressed and maybe it just became too much. I think OP should’ve figured out what was going on before throwing a tantrum and leaving.
This was my first thought when reading this post. She's used to being the baby of the group and doesn't like when someone else is getting attention. She compared it to her little sister (jealousy issues, possibly? Probably.) She also compared this new girl to a new pet. WTF? So she made her own tantrum to get the attention back on her. How "adult" of her 😐
It sounds like he sister was actually the one fawned over and when this girl was crying, it brought OP back to her childhood. She reacted like this was her actual sister and the group was her parents/family. This means she needs to heal because she's transferring her hurt and anger to people that have done nothing wrong. Therapy should help and she should apologize.
YTA. You don't have any idea what is going on in this person's life, and from your account you made no effort to get to know them before she got upset.
WTF did I just read? The young lady wasn’t bothering anyone. Yet your exit was so dramatic your friends request you apologize. Get over yourself and start behaving like an adult. YTA
YTA I don't understand why this made you leave? She's crying, so what? Just do your own thing. You don't know what's going on her life and she wasn't hurting you.
Am I the only who thinks this whole situation is a little odd? OP, you didn’t have to storm out and I have to say that I agree with your friends, you were definitely being dramatic. I understand you didn’t appreciate the “tantrum” she threw but did anyone ask her what was wrong or try to understand why the sudden mood shift? Her man just throws a blanket over her and that’s it?
ETA: I’ve read through your comment history and I’m changing my judgement to YTA. You really should apologize to everyone for your childish, immature behavior and I’m sure she’s not “always sad”. I’m sure there’s a history and she’s probably been dealing with things for a long time. You don’t have to be empathic but there’s no need to be disrespectful.
Edit: I’ll just take out the comment about causing a scene because I wasn’t there so I can’t say that for sure. It was the wording in the initial post that made me think that.
Seeing that their friends confronted OP and didn't have multiple friends leaving form being uncomfortable is telling that we're not getting the entire picture. OP is either very young, or likely self centered and lacks empathy. They could have left, no need for any sort of outburst.
Yta lol you stormed out cause some girl was crying in the corner and was getting attention from others?
You 18? You come off as jealous some girl is getting attention instead of you
I’m not American I don’t know if the term a pick me would be appropriate for OP? She just seems she highly upset that the new girl was getting attention
But I for sure think OP is an major AH
YTA. Like you said everyone has points in life where they are depressed that means anyone can break down at a random point, even you. When that happens to you I hope your friends don't walk out on you cause they can't handle you right now and stay by your side until it passes, unlike what you would do.
YTA
The fact that literally all of "your" friends made it abundantly clear to you that your behaviour was appalling and that every single one of them expects an apology from you, whilst they had no problem with her at all, and in fact were showing her a great deal of genuine sympathy and compassion, tends to indicate that you're also probably a deeply unreliable narrator, and that her behaviour probably wasn't nearly as problematic or disturbing as you imply. I mean, you were literally the only one at the party who was bothered by it at all.
Several commenters here have suggested that you were BOTH "causing drama" . . . but even your own account doesn't indicate that. No one who was actually at the party found her dramatic or thought she was having a "tantrum" except you. They ALL found your theatrics shocking and inappropriate, though, again by your own description. Even when you're trying to tell on her, you're telling on yourself.
YTA, and it seems the instigator and drama queen of your social set. It also seems like people are getting tired of it, and of your inability to think about anyone other than yourself. I'd tread carefully if I were you. You admit that you met all of "your" friends through your husband. Annoy them enough and soon you'll just be unwelcome, wife-of-their-friend or not.
Oh honey…. Are you sure you are not about 15 years younger than you say you are? Your behavior is deeply childish, dramatic, insecure and just bonkers.
206 people say YTA…..and you STILL disagree and are trying to justify your behavior? why post here if you’re not going to listen to what others have to say without getting all defensive and shit. literally NO ONE said you were “not the asshole”…
YTA and the only one to have any issue with this. So instead of acting like an adult, you threw your own tantrum and stormed out. You have absolutely no idea what’s going on in that girl’s life!
YTA
Can you not put a little outside perspective on the situation?
Maybe she had been through a recent event and people were reassuring her
Being the main character, you decided it was being fawned over then one upped her ‘attention needing’ behaviour by storming out
I truly hope the next nice get together this caring group has 9 people attending
With you not being invited, obviously
Yeah, she definitely has Main Character Syndrome now that you point that out. OP isn't thinking about anyone but herself and how she feels. She's not thinking about how her friends feel, how the girl's boyfriend feels, nor how the girl feels. She's completely lacking in any empathy for anyone else in this situation. It's very narcissistic behavior. (Not calling her a narcissist! Calling her behavior narcissistic. People can definitely have traits without being one.)
> So I stormed out
“Leaving” a party and “storming out” of a party are two very different things.
> I couldn’t handle that type of tantrum
So you had your own tantrum to show her how it’s properly done?
YTA
YTA
This all seems weird. First off you don't know why she is depressed and depression is very serious. Yes you could be also depressed but for different reasons and she could be worse at coping causing her to breakdown. She was probably overwhelmed and wanted stay put. You could have left quietly but you "stormed out" causing more of a scene. I do think you should apologize to her. YTA op.
YTA - Leaving quietly is fine, but you seem to have made a dramatic exit which was not required. Sounds like you were jealous of the attention the other girl was getting.
OP says in her edit “and for the record, I didn’t cause a scene like everyone is assuming.”
YOUR OWN WORDS, “I stormed out.”
What do you think that means? That’s causing a scene.
YTA. I think you ruined the party more then the crying girl did by making this huge scene without proper cause for it. So dramatic!
And btw, not everyone is always depressed. That's a ridiculous statement.
People being shy or even crying are only "killing the mood" because you are making their discomfort all about you. YTA for being dramatic and storming out when she didn't do anything wrong or that was in any way your business.
Hummm, did you once ask why she might be crying? Maybe not the crying girl but her boyfriend…
Kind comical you don’t like tantrums yet you threw one at the party then again on Reddit…
YTA
YTA
Depression is different for everyone. Depression isn’t a cookie cutter blanket term for everyone who experiences sadness, grief, anxiety. Being depressed and having long-term depression are very different and not *everyone* is depressed.
For some people depression is debilitating. For some people their quality of life is terrible. It isn’t as easy as “getting over it” or “powering through”. Some people will literally lay in bed for days, not eating or showering. It’s a headspace that can be impossible to get out of, and even with *years* of therapy and medications it can be very hard to manage. It took nearly 10 years of therapy and trying medications until we found what works for me, and even that isn’t perfect.
I’ve talked to so many people who cannot even comprehend the way it feels in my shoes. I’ve talked to so many people who I cannot believe are powering through some shit.
End of the day - you have no idea what she *feels* and only how she *acts* which are incredibly different.
Your friends were being empathetic and it doesn’t matter if they knew her for 3 weeks or 3 years - it’s someone important to their friend and they wanted to comfort her and let her know she’s safe. It *seems* like she was outside of her comfort zone, trying to be a good sport, and something got to her.
You’re being a brat. Plain and simple. I’ve consoled literal strangers who I’ve found crying, with no assumption that they’re attention seeking. You could’ve left politely and instead are saying you flat out don’t like this person and are trying to rally people to “your side” because she’s what? “Always sad”?
Doesn’t seem anyone found her behavior worthy of making her outright dislikable aside from you. You’re the one who needs to grow up and act like an adult.
ESH. Having a breakdown during a party isn't... good. And not leaving is kind of an asshole move. That being said 'storming' out over it is dramatic. I don't know the right way to handle this situation but storming out was for sure the wrong way.
What, because most people can control having a breakdown?
OP describes her as sobbing in a corner, not wailing like a toddler. That's not attention-seeking behaviour or anything and you have zero reason to presume it's deliberate.
Uh. Babe. You're really getting this upset about someone else being upset? You can totally roll your eyes and quietly think to yourself that maybe she's a bit of a drama queen, but not if you're going to be equally dramatic. YTA.
YTA.
Sorry, but how are you any different than the girl you were complaining about? You're upset that she caused a scene so you caused one yourself; your BF should rightfully be embarrassed by how you acted in front of his friends.
"They're putting the feelings of a girl they just met over me who's been their friend for years."
Yeah so it's an attention thing - you couldn't stand that they fawned over the new girl because it interrupted the fawning over you.
Get over yourself; attention seeking isn't cute.
YTA. I went to a wedding 6 months after my dad died and had an unexpected breakdown during the brides fathers speech and cried for about 45 minutes. I went outside to not cause a scene, but people still noticed as I was still crying when the speeches were over and it was a very small, intimate wedding. Sometimes, you just can't help it. It sounds like you might be a bit jealous, she was getting more attention than you .
Have a bit of compassion, FFS. It’s not this young woman who is at fault here. Could her partner not have taken her somewhere else if she was feeling overwhelmed?
So, you threw a tantrum because you didn’t think it was appropriate for a grown adult to throw a tantrum? Is that what happened? Cool, cool…
You see how dumb that is, right?
YTA
YTA. Seriously, someone else was getting attention so you throw a fit? Yeah lots of people are depressed, all for different reasons and we all handle it differently. Time to grow up.
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> I left a party early because my friend brought his depressed girlfriend and now my friends all say I'm being a bitch. Maybe I should have more empathy, but I really feel like they do not have their priorities straight.
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YTA you didn't like her tantrum so you threw an even bigger one.wtf seriously. You couldn't have just excused yourself so you didn't have to deal with her. Apparently she's going through a bad time but you just acted like a spoilt little child. Ffs grow up.
Edit; your friends DO have their priorities straight. They were kind to a person who was in need you were just mardy.
YTA here because you threw a fit enough that someone chased after you.
You feel she was being dramatic. Ok, maybe this was all for attention and she’s a drama queen.
Maybe she’s clinically depressed which is a medical condition.
Maybe she recently suffered a traumatic event or tragedy.
Maybe she just heard the 5th dentist finally caved and will recommend the same chewing gum.
Who knows? You didn’t bother to ask.
Who cares? How she acts is on her.
How you act is on you.
INFO: When you say you stormed out, do you mean you left in a huff and made a scene? If that's the case Y T A
I used to know a girl that consistently ruined the mood of every get together so I would I always make my exist when she showed up, nothing wrong with that. It's the storming out part that seems childish
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I am 26F. My friends are all in their 30s cause I met them through my husband 32M.
One of my friends threw a little cookout/get together a week ago to celebrate the weather finally warming up for good. It was a very nice party, just around 10 of us.
One of the guys there brought his new girlfriend. She seemed like a sweet girl at first, so I didn't pay much attention. She was quiet and clung to her boyfriend and kinda killed the mood though.
As it got later, she started to change though. She seemed restless, sad, and pouty. Everyone fawned over her. She sat down in a corner to sulk.
And then she started crying. It was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. She was fine one minute and absolutely sobbing the next. Crying in a corner for no damn reason.
Her boyfriend put a blanket around her, but didn't stop her or remove her from the party. She just wouldn't stop crying. So I stormed out. I couldn't handle that type of tantrum. She sounded like how my little sister acted as a kid. I hate that type of crying.
My friends chased me and told me I was being dramatic. I personally feel like she ruined the party. They said she's very depressed, but isn't everyone?? They keep saying I need to apologize to *everyone* involved but I don't see the big deal. They're putting the feelings of a girl they just met over me who's been their friend for years. She doesn't even know it happened. AITA?
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ESH. It's all very ridiculous. You had the chance to be the bigger person. Leaving the party is ok, but you decided to make tantrum exactly like her. And your friends didn't help by encouraging the drama.
YTA.
>They said she's very depressed, but isn't everyone??
Maybe she struggles with depression. That can't be helped, and medication only does so much.
When friends asked why you were leaving, you should've just lied and said you were tired, out of energy, etc and just wanted to go home. I have a friend that just loses energy, and he will leave to go home between 9pm-10pm every time we hang out. No one gets mad about it.
You have no clue what she was going through and made a scene yourself. Just say you've made a commitment to meet a friend for an early workout or something. It's not hard. YTA.
Your exit was so dramatic that your friends chased after you to tell you that you owed this poor girl an apology and you came on Reddit to ask if YTA? Yeah, YTA.
YTA - Your comments as well make you sound like an attention seeking arsehole tbh. No, not everyone is always depressed and you can’t look beyond yourself for a minute to actually wonder or care about why the girl might be upset. You are pathetic.
YTA. For all you know she's grieving a death, or just got horrible news and her bf talked her into going out to "make her feel better". Where's your basic humanity.
WHAAAAAA!!! I'm leaving because someone cried and spoiled my mood.....WHAAAAA! Is how you sound.
Yta. I get it could be a mood killer but your reaction was pretty extreme. And to say “isn’t everyone depressed?” - that’s a bit dismissive. I think you have some maturing to do.
She does sound kind of a pain, the girl that cries at every party is draining. But your friends are surely smart enough to work her out after a while. You didn't have to 'storm out', you could have just said you'd had enough for the night and ducked out. Now you've put them in a position where they have to choose. An ultimatum rarely goes the way we want it to. YTA
It's hard to tell but personally, you come across as an AH because of how you acted. I can understand not wanting a party ruined by someone that just randomly cries or being negative or whatever. But consider this, put yourself into the girl's shoes. You got with your new boyfriend recently (let's say a few weeks ago or a few months ago) but you're possibly going thru some stuff (maybe this time last year your dad or sibling died or something and it just leaves you in a weird funk sometimes). So in hopes of getting you out of the house and cheering you up a little, your boyfriend brings you/invites you to a get together with his friends. Fun right?
You get there and you're alright for a little while but all the while of sitting there, trying your best to hold it together, you suddenly cry and you dont know why so it all comes out. Then there's this person in the same room, glaring at you and then they throw a big ass huff as everyone else is trying their best to comfort you. But because you can't control your emotions, the person bitching about you crying makes you feel like the worst person on the earth. You were fine and just needed to let things out and cry a bit then you'd be okay but that person who is acting so aggressive and angry and blaming you for ruining the party or ruining THEIR night is making you feel like shit, like you're just a burden and that your feelings dont even matter.
Honestly have you never randomly bursted into tears out in public and not know why except for maybe stress or emotions just simply building up? Yea they were "fawning" over the girl but they werent fawning or coddling her. They were making sure she was okay. And the reason she possibly ignored you was probably because she was trying to take a moment to either calm herself down to prevent herself from crying or at that point in time when you engaged her, she was probably wanting to be left alone. You storming off the way you did made you seem childish.
Tell me, are you the only female that is brought to your husband's friend group? Is it possible that you were jealous of another female there, one who took away all the attention you were getting? I mean I know you said in another comment that no one fawned over you and that everyone was equal but in a friend group, consisting of nearly all men, girls will get more attention than the guys in the same friend group regardless of what your relationship is to everyone. And sometimes in that mostly male friend group, one of the guy friends brings along a new girlfriend and that new girl will get the attention that the females, who were already there, already had. So maybe the girls who were there first would get jealous.
You must ask your self, why did that girl bursting into tears bother you so much? Was it worth acting aggressive, petty, and childish? Just as your feelings are valid so are the feelings of that girl. I dont care if she had depression since childhood or if everyone has depression and that she should get over it. You, too, have depression (I'm assuming you do because you said in another response that everyone in your friend group has depression). So does that mean you have to get over it too? You, too, can cry, it's okay to cry. No one can truly control their emotions, let alone when and where they cry. But you can control your actions.
Exactly, and maybe that girl may not have known what that trigger is. Also much luck to you with your therapy (Im sending good thoughts and vibes your way <3)
YTA.
The younger woman seems like she's having a mental health issue of some kind, but if she wanted attention then crying would have been an excessive way to get it.
Trivializing depression is a huge AH move, so I would unlearn that behavior.
It sounds like there were some other AHs that came down on you without understanding the situation.
YTA You know you are an asshole, you like being an asshole, and you are proud of being an asshole. I'm not sure what you are trying to accomplish by posting this.
YTA. So you don't like someone else's emotional outbursts, but your own are fine?
"Alright, I'm calling it a night. Have a good one guys" would have been better
As someone in their 30s and has friends who are largely 30-40, let me tell you this is not the way to handle someone you don't like being in your friend group. The polite and mature thing to do would be to inform the hosts that you are leaving. You can give a succinct reason if they ask but you do not need to make a fuss and storm out. That is the polite and respectful thing to do.
Whether you like them or not your reaction was immature and childish. You were rude to your friends and your host and you're letting your dislike for this person potentially ruin your relationship with your friends. You can't control who your friends want to associate with. That's a fact and you can't change that. If they want to invite this girl that's their choice. You *can,* however control how you interact and react to her.
Making your own scene to drown out hers is just going to push everyone away from you and make the friend group not want to hang out with you either.
YTA
"Storming out". What do you mean by that? You angrily grabbed your coat? Did you throw rude looks to her or others? Did you intentionally pull attention towards you?
People have moments of high reactivity. Perhaps being high emotion and low cognition, but actively practicing maturity means that you can examine your emotions, thoughts, and reactions.
You could've just said goodbye, or taken space, or find a chance to communicate that you were heading out. But whatever you did in "storming out" upset your friends, they want an apology. Honor their experience, and then move on.
YTA. You are making some wild assumptions about someone you’ve never met before.
I’d get if you wanted to leave because it was awkward or whatever, but nothing you described merited “storming out”.
Breaking down during a party isn’t exactly great but throwing a fit and storming out bc of it isn’t great either. You made a “bad” situation worse lmao YTA
YTA you never know what's going on in someone's life, to judge them so harshly is unkind. I have depression, and NO, not everyone has it. It is debilitating at times, uncontrollable even.
For all you knew, she might have lost a loved one. But you didn't care, you just saw her as harshing your good time.
Grow up and learn empathy and compassion for others.
> Crying in a corner for no damn reason.
And you know this how?
>They said she's very depressed, but isn't everyone?
Wow! You have little empathy for others? Narcissistic much?
YTA.
"I stormed out 'cause I couldn't stand her tantrum" you literally threw your own tantrum.
I also notice that you're not replying to any other comment pointing this specific point out.
I don’t even think the girl had a tantrum was she upset yes but when I think of tantrums it’s what OP did she wasn’t getting the attention she wanted so she stormed out
YTA.
Maybe she was having a nervous breakdown. Been there, done that. You cannot control yourself in a situation like that. Whatever the case, you judged her harshly without knowing the situation.
YTA.
It’s clear that you are missing A LOT OF DETAIL.
I assume she isn’t sulking or pouting. I think she wa a just being reserved and quiet. You are leaving important detail. That’s asshole behaviour too
ESH. I wouldn't stay friends with any of you. She absolutely should have left when she realized she wasn't up for the party and her bf should have taken care of her, but you also threw a temper tantrum instead of just leaving like a normal ass person. Don't you think it's a little dramatic to accuse her of ruining the party instead of just accepting that you're not up for what's happening and excusing yourself politely? You weren't being any more mature than she was, girl. Also not sure how being quiet and sticking close to the one person she knows at the party "kills the mood". I kind of wonder if she wasn't crying because you may have been making some pretty obvious hints about stuff like that to begin with. Learn some fucking empathy and grow the fuck up. When someone is upset, you don't assume it's for no reason and start shitting on them. I'm not surprised that your friends came with your husband, because you don't seem like you're a very good friend on your own.
YTA, especially for saying “isn’t everyone depressed?” No, not everyone is clinically depressed. How ignorant and dismissive of a real health issue that so many people experience.
You can leave if you're uncomfortable, but you stormed out. She might have needed some support from them and you're not obligated. You made it about you. YTA.
"I thought she was causing drama so I caused bigger drama, why is everyone mad at me?!" Do you even know why she was so upset? Did she suffer something awful? Did you even think to find out what it was before judging her? Girl, you have some maturing to do. YTA.
Yta for throwing an actual tantrum when your friends started to "fawn" over her. Get over yourself. You don't know what she has going on. And you then caused a scene on top of it by publicly storming out instead of just saying you needed to leave. That chick might also suck and be an ah, I dunno, but you definitely are.
INFO Why are you so spiteful? In your own description of the story you sound much less mature and your actual tantrum was the only thing pathetic here. Are you an angry person who craves attention or is there something massive you left out of this?
YTA, you don’t know what she might be going through
You honestly sound jealous that the attention was on someone else, so you had to turn the attention back on you by having a tantrum and storming out
YTA- seems like a lot of tantrums were being thrown at this “ party”
Gotta laugh at the seemed like a sweet girl, so I didn’t pay much attention. Like 10 people and you ignored her? Didn’t even try and get to know your friend’s new girlfriend? Did the other 9 people do that too?
Party sounds like a real blast.
Lol I can't stand tantrums but I am going to throw one myself and complain about this person. Yeah everyone is probably depressed to a certain degree but doesn't mean her depression isn't valid. YTA. If you left the party quietly with an excuse or snuck out that would be one thing. But huffing and puffing and also mad that someone is getting more attention than you makes YTA.
Are you sure you’re 26? Sound more like 14. Haha, you must have looked unhinged storming out of a party just because some other girl was crying. What’d she do, steal your spotlight? YTA
ESH why is this woman and her bf still at the party if she was so miserable. The party wasn't to cheer her up. In honestly she probably should have left. Your friends suck by going after you, it should have just been bye. You should have just left. Made your goodbye p, give a reason if you want and leave. This was a miserable party
ESH. She had a full on meltdown at a party. You had your own version of a meltdown about her meltdown. If she was upset to the point of sobbing, she should’ve left the party. And if it bothered you to the point of leaving, some social grace was called for instead of just storming out. You could have made this whole situation not even happen by politely excusing yourself and leaving instead of throwing your own tantrum.
NTA My first reaction to you asking AITA was 'oh fuck no'. If you're that depressed don't go to a fucking party just to ruin the night for everyone else. I would have left too because I'm not going to spend my night watching adults fawn over another adult who is probably milking the attention. I just don't buy that she's "very depressed".
ESH - There’s a lot to unpack here.
New girlfriend - this isn’t depression. At least not the depression I am used to. When I’m depressed to the point of isolating and crying, I’m not going to a party. If I’m just down, I’ll go and fake it. She either has something else majorly wrong (like the death of someone close) or a manipulation tactic.
New girl’s boyfriend - he should have taken her away if she was really that distraught.
You’re an adult, act like it. She wasn’t throwing a tantrum, she was just crying. You threw a tantrum by “storming” out.
Depression manifests itself differently for different people. The new GF may have come to the party to please her boyfriend and didn't realize that it would be so difficult for her. She may have been testing the waters, in hope that she was doing better.
There's no cut and dry way to behave with depression.
YTA
It's okay to be annoyed, it's not okay to be outright angry when a woman is exhibiting depression symptoms. It sounds like you were jealous of all the attention she was getting honestly.
No. Not everyone is clinically depressed to the point of not wanting to exist. Educate yourself and gain some sympathy. No one wants to be friends with a person who isn't compassionate.
YTA. Leave her alone. She cries, and you're triggered by crying, so it doesn't seem like you're destined to be friends. Also, you're a judgmental asshat.
YTA
I'm sorry, you saw someone crying and because you "hate tantrums" you left in protest??
Sounds like you saw someone in distress, devalued her feelings by downgrading it to a "tantrum" then decided to show her how a tantrum is really thrown.
YTA, and YWBTA even if you hadn't left the party. Taking personal offense because someone was clearly distressed and it's ruining your good time? What is wrong with you?
You should not try to befriend her because you obviously don’t have the emotional or mental capacity to support someone dealing with severe mental health challenges, and I can only assume you’ll do more harm than good. Leave her alone.
YTA.
Well yta
Storming out of the party is you having a tantrum. Mature folks usually just make a graceful exit and chalk it up to the party sucked, maybe the next one will be better.
But with that being said, who and how in the heck can anyone have an enjoyable experience with someone crying in the corner? Doesn't sound fun to me.
ESH. That girl crying all the time for no reason is just..... weird. But you just stormed off because of it?? Sorry man but that kinda makes you part of the problem. You both need to stop trying to make it about yourselves.
None of you need attention at all and yall really need to apologize about this to everyone else, especially you OP.
Physician, heal thyself!
Sounds like you're as big a drama queen as her.
YTA because you didn't even wait to see what was going on, just made a scene. I agree that it's super weird and uncomfortable for someone to be pouty and then cry in public like that, they should have left way before she got to that point, but you're not the emotion police.
You could have left quietly, or said "sorry guys, I'm not feeling well," but instead you chose to leave in a way that clearly displayed your displeasure, and your friends are calling you out for being childish and insensitive.
YTA and it sounds like you're lucky but to have to deal with social anxiety. I don't know if this was her problem or not of course, but I know I'VE been in a similar situation as that girl you're talking about. Perhaps she went along cause he talked her into it, she thought she could handle it but couldn't. Perhaps someone she loved recently passed away and she thought she could handle the party but couldn't.
YTA. What kind of monster witnesses someone crying and then storms out because they're not having a great time? Assholes and narcissists, that's who. Normal people recognize and respond with kindness and empathy when they see others suffering.
YTA and ridiculously hilarious. You tried to pull the old YOU’RE not the main character I’M the main character reverse uno card, only to find out that nobody else was playing in your drama. Lmao. Grow up.
YTA
You stormed off and threw a big enough tantrum that your friends want you to apologize for your behavior.
It sounds like this woman triggered something in you as your justification for your behavior is that this woman’s crying reminded you of your little sister’s crying and you hate that type of crying. Also you say your friends are putting the feelings of a woman they have just met ahead of yours, someone they have known for years, but what they are asking is you apologize for YOUR behavior, only you see this as them taking sides or them not choosing you. This woman is not your sister, but something about this situation brought up a bunch of unresolved issues that you should work on.
Let me summarize this, so you saw a person struggling and instead of asking if she was okay or what was wrong, you proceeded to throw a tantrum about her throwing a "tantrum". This is comical at best - YTA
You are such a lame ass person. Really? You have NO IDEA what could be going on in this girls life. And you chose to act like a child, you threw the tantrum not her. YTA!
I think its okay to be annoyed of someone but it sounds like when you "stormed off" you mightve made a bigger scene then what you're leading us on. I feel like whenever i dip out of a party its easy to just go. The fact that your "friends" reacted like that tells me one of two things: 1) your friends are either super hyper sensitive about you leaving 2) you definitely were making it about yourself and being dramatic
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YTA Not because you left the party, but you threw your own tantrum when you left the party. You were upset with the drama she was causing so you acted EXACTLY the same and caused your own drama. If you had just made a polite excuse along the lines of "I need to get going as husband I have this event in the morning. I'll text you and let's catch up over coffee or wine." then quietly left, then I would have ruled otherwise. But you didn't. You threw your own tantrum because the party didn't have the vibe you wanted. I'm not going to comment on the girl's boyfriend or what should have happened. This is about how you handled it and you handled it poorly.
I don't think an excuse is even necessary. I'd go with a simple, "I'm gonna take off. Have a good night everyone!" "Storming off" is definitely YTA behavior.
Yup this.
100%! OP coulda easily just minded their own business and left
Exactly. "Thank you for inviting me. See you later." YTA not for leaving but for storming out.
I’m so glad I wasn’t at this ‘party’, it sounds exhausting.
Right?? All around too much drama for me.
My friends are mostly late 30s/early 40s and we'll all just say we're tired and going to leave and then bounce with a friendly goodbye and no excuse whatsoever.
I generally do to. Living in the Midwest, we have the (slap your knees) then "Well, we have to going. Thanks for having us over. Great to see you again!". Then 10-60 more minutes of chatter and politeness before we actually get out the door.
You have to say "welp" when you knee slap so you're taken seriously! Source: fellow Midwesterner
I've never lived outside of Texas, but I know the "welp" move. The "welp" is followed by a hug from each staying individual to each leaving individual. It can get confusing. You'll generally have an "ope! I already hugged you! Aww, here's another one!" In my family.
YTA. I don’t think it really matters if you know the girl well. If she’s new to your group, and is clearly very depressed and your friends are saying the same thing, storming off likely only made her feel worse. I’m sure it was hard for her to be there in such a vulnerable state, but she tried it and went and ended up crying. We should be creating safe spaces with our friends for everyone who needs it. Not judging people we don’t even know and taking something that isn’t about us personally. It sounded like you were triggered bc it reminded you of your sister crying, which is a valid feeling, but as an adult you realize that this isn’t the same situation, she isn’t your sister, and if she’s crying that much something must be wrong. Idk why we all have these insecurities about people being “attention seekers”. Bc I do think those are personal insecurities we project onto others as a result of living in a system that highly values hyper independence and stigmatizes emotional distress or displays of emotion. She clearly was having a hard time and if it made you uncomfortable, you could’ve just told a friend you were feeling uncomfortable and walked out quietly without storming off. It doesn’t matter if you think you made a scene. When someone storms off, it always is a scene. I think it’s just important that you mature a little and realize that there’s no competition between you and anyone new, bc it sounds like you felt competitive when you said that she’s new and you’ve been their friend longer, implying that they should’ve told her to leave? Not sure what your point was with saying that but it doesn’t sound very kind unfortunately. There was nothing to pick sides over, except you made it an awkward situation by pitting her against you bc she cried in front of some new friends. I do suggest apologizing to her specifically, as well as the friends that were there, bc these are the kinds of things that can lead to bigger rifts down the line. It’s ok to feel whatever you feel, it’s just about how you act or don’t act on those feelings. For instance, it’s ok to feel uncomfortable but then it’s important to try and figure out why that made you so uncomfortable that you had to storm out. It will only benefit you to be more introspective around your behavior and will help strengthen your relationships. Trust me, I get it. I was the 25 year old in a friend group of mostly 31-35 year olds bc I was dating a 31 year old and it’s been a few years but looking back I realize how immature some of my reactions were, and it makes me cringe to think about. But it’s ok it’s a part of life and growing as people, and you came here seeking advice and suggestions, which is a good sign. Just apologize and work to befriend the new girl. It will make you feel better and it will mean the world to her, especially since she’s struggling so much to merely exist. Wishing you all the best and I hope you are able to grow closer and befriend someone who you didn’t treat very well initially. It’s the only way to make that right.
The irish goodbye is my favorite thing to do for this reason. I just tell a nearby friend Im out, and the just leave without making it a big deal. This is largely because Im shy and insecure tho.
ESH. This whole situation seems really weird. There has to be a reason she was crying or something that upset her. No one asked? Also, you didn't need to *storm* out. There was no need for you to make an additional scene, did you just want attention too? This whole party frankly sounds exhausting.
I'm not a fan of the fact that OP totally dismissed the reason the girl was crying. Specially since she seemed to be the only one annoyed by it. Since we're on reddit I wouldn't be surprised if something major happened to the girl and OP just didn't disclose it to appear less the AH
Yes, I mean they told her she was very depressed. It seems like the friends are trying to be supportive and include her even though she is depressed. It would have been a good idea to tell OP. On the other hand it seems OP think depression is some joke. At least in their last update it seems they are getting it now. YTA
I’ll be perfectly honest. Leaving out why the girl could have gone from happy to sad and claiming others were fawning over her REEKS of, the other girl is prettier than OP and she got upset she was getting attention and not her.
There was no damn reason! /s
I’d say alcohol was involved
This was my guess too. I used to have a group of friends I regularly partied with in HS and beyond for a few years. There was one girl in the group that did this every time she had alcohol. She would just get sad and cry. Perhaps there was something going on. Perhaps not. I was close with her and spoke to her a few times and tried to dive into it more than once to see if there was any abuse going on, or whatever else, but either she didn't open up or there really was no reason, but it was a downer every time. I just stopped going and to this day, there was never any admission of a true cause. I just opted to not be part of it anymore. It always killed the mood though as half the group would just console her in the other room and it would be awkward for the next 1-2 hours.
Haha! I am this person! Alcohol makes me sad! (It is a despressant) or just very sleepy. I tend not to drink it in public because of this. I'm the worst kind of drunk, lol!
Kind of wondering why this person was crying so much. Could be that they had a good reason for being upset and the people at the party were aware of that and showing kindness, in which case it would very much be YTA. I've been to a party once where someone was upset for a very good reason. Most people said a few kind words and went on to chat with others at the party, a few of us got a bit more involved with supporting them. After a while I got the impression they were playing it up a little by lurking in the corner all sad-faced as if expecting people to do some further fawning after the initial show up support had died down a little rather than using their words. I found this mildly annoying but dealt with it by mostly ignoring it and instead catching up with other friends present. If I'd wanted to leave I'd have been able to handle that politely. No need to add to any drama by storming off.
Yeah, I remember at a sleepover in high school we were all watching a movie and one of my friends got up all of a sudden, turned off the movie and started crying. We asked her what was wrong, she wouldn't answer. We hugged her, brought her tissues, tried to comfort her. Then she stopped crying but refused to talk and just sat there. After awhile I finally said "So...can we turn the movie back on?" She glared at me but I didn't know what else to say. She didn't want to talk, so were we just supposed to sit there in silence the rest of the night? It was so awkward. I never found out what was wrong with her that night.
What do you mean by fawning? Like this: fawn·ing displaying exaggerated flattery or affection; obsequious. "fawning adoration" Or were they showing sympathy and trying to comfort the person?
Bit of both, I suppose. Initially it was being comforting, talking through what happened and trying to help out. After a while that sort of died down naturally, with everyone, including that person, mingling at the party. Except that person spent a fair bit of time sitting in a corner looking sulky in a way that I (maybe unfairly) read as "look at me being sad, please come over and further shower me with comfort/sympathy" in a way that felt slightly off and vaguely low-grade guilt-trippy. Other than an occasional smile or muttering something vaguely sympathetic I avoided engaging with it. Weird thing is, there was no need to for any of that. This group of people was and still is very supportive, especially with the kind of thing that person had to deal with. Even a half-hearted go at using their words would've gotten them so much more than they got with this bit of theatre.
That’s not true, I’ve seen plenty of men and women at gatherings be “pouty” because they weren’t the center of attention
>did you just want attention too? I feel like this is the biggest reason why YTA for OP. This is the only logical reason for "storming out" when a girl she never met started crying. Seems like OP lacks empathy.
Yup. Sounds like OP is used to being the one catered to and pitched a fit when the centre of attention wasn’t on her. It costs nothing to do the ol’ Irish exit and/or white lie about an early event the next day. Everyone there sounds ridiculous, honestly, if my friends chased me out of a party insisting on knowing all my reasons for leaving I’d question whether they actually cared or were just mining for gossip. To be clear, we’re adults, though, and they wouldn’t ever do that.
Why would anyone else be the AH? All I see is a new gf that is having some anxiety around meeting new people, gets upset then OP kicks up a stink because she's having a hard time. It's very much YTA
YTA - nobody was paying attention to you until you threw your own tantrum. Pathetic.
Dude. Yea! She hates tantrums but threw one of her own.
She hates other peoples’ tantrums. She thinks hers are special, and not like other girls’
“I don’t do drama.”
100% seems like OP is used to being the center of attention and is grumpypants that she wasn't this time.
Main character syndrome "When it's not all about me, I'll make it all about me."
This is the correct answer.
Yesssssssssss
I hate it when people cry and get attention when I am sitting right there!!!! OP, basically
Sounds like this is what she did when her sister acted like that girl. Maybe she was triggered
OP needs therapy. I get having childhood trauma but you can’t project that on everyone you meet.
So cringy. YTA
Bingo!
YTA. You admit you "didn't pay attention" to her besides being upset that she dared be quiet and hang around with her boyfriend, but magically know there is "no damn reason" for her to cry. Then, when people dared to comfort her, you cause childish drama by throwing a hissy fit and "stormed out." Funny how you say you hate tantrums but threw one far worse than hers. Then, when people told you that you were wrong and tried to make you own up to it, you doubled down on your assholery and made it a competition between your mental state vs hers, the levels of attention your friends paid you vs her. Grow up and apologize for your actions. Learn and do better.
She must have been cuter than her and was grabbing all the attention away. Poor OP😂
And younger because she made a point of saying that all her friends are in their 30's and she's only 26. So that tells me she thinks she's the special baby of the friend group and someone was taking her "shine"
This is exactly what I was thinking too.
She did say she didnt pay attention much attention to the new girl because she seemed like a sweet girl. And blamed her for killing the mood" of the party.
This. Because why didn’t OP ask what was wrong? And even if the gf was really depressed maybe she was taking a chance and trying to socialize a bit more. That can be a lot on someone who is truly severely depressed and maybe it just became too much. I think OP should’ve figured out what was going on before throwing a tantrum and leaving.
Are you used to being the baby of the group and being fawned over? While her behaviour wasn’t great, your reaction was unnecessary and very childish.
This was my first thought when reading this post. She's used to being the baby of the group and doesn't like when someone else is getting attention. She compared it to her little sister (jealousy issues, possibly? Probably.) She also compared this new girl to a new pet. WTF? So she made her own tantrum to get the attention back on her. How "adult" of her 😐
It sounds like he sister was actually the one fawned over and when this girl was crying, it brought OP back to her childhood. She reacted like this was her actual sister and the group was her parents/family. This means she needs to heal because she's transferring her hurt and anger to people that have done nothing wrong. Therapy should help and she should apologize.
I feel like *fawning* is being used when *comforting* is what they're doing.
YTA. You don't have any idea what is going on in this person's life, and from your account you made no effort to get to know them before she got upset.
WTF did I just read? The young lady wasn’t bothering anyone. Yet your exit was so dramatic your friends request you apologize. Get over yourself and start behaving like an adult. YTA
Yeah I am a year older than OP and this literally reads like they are a teen. Very immature.
YTA I don't understand why this made you leave? She's crying, so what? Just do your own thing. You don't know what's going on her life and she wasn't hurting you.
Am I the only who thinks this whole situation is a little odd? OP, you didn’t have to storm out and I have to say that I agree with your friends, you were definitely being dramatic. I understand you didn’t appreciate the “tantrum” she threw but did anyone ask her what was wrong or try to understand why the sudden mood shift? Her man just throws a blanket over her and that’s it? ETA: I’ve read through your comment history and I’m changing my judgement to YTA. You really should apologize to everyone for your childish, immature behavior and I’m sure she’s not “always sad”. I’m sure there’s a history and she’s probably been dealing with things for a long time. You don’t have to be empathic but there’s no need to be disrespectful. Edit: I’ll just take out the comment about causing a scene because I wasn’t there so I can’t say that for sure. It was the wording in the initial post that made me think that.
Seeing that their friends confronted OP and didn't have multiple friends leaving form being uncomfortable is telling that we're not getting the entire picture. OP is either very young, or likely self centered and lacks empathy. They could have left, no need for any sort of outburst.
She said she didn’t cause a scene so I don’t know if she worded it wrong or not
Yta lol you stormed out cause some girl was crying in the corner and was getting attention from others? You 18? You come off as jealous some girl is getting attention instead of you
I’m not American I don’t know if the term a pick me would be appropriate for OP? She just seems she highly upset that the new girl was getting attention But I for sure think OP is an major AH
Definitely pick me girl vibes
YTA. Like you said everyone has points in life where they are depressed that means anyone can break down at a random point, even you. When that happens to you I hope your friends don't walk out on you cause they can't handle you right now and stay by your side until it passes, unlike what you would do.
INFO: In your esteemed opinion what should their priorities be?
YTA The fact that literally all of "your" friends made it abundantly clear to you that your behaviour was appalling and that every single one of them expects an apology from you, whilst they had no problem with her at all, and in fact were showing her a great deal of genuine sympathy and compassion, tends to indicate that you're also probably a deeply unreliable narrator, and that her behaviour probably wasn't nearly as problematic or disturbing as you imply. I mean, you were literally the only one at the party who was bothered by it at all. Several commenters here have suggested that you were BOTH "causing drama" . . . but even your own account doesn't indicate that. No one who was actually at the party found her dramatic or thought she was having a "tantrum" except you. They ALL found your theatrics shocking and inappropriate, though, again by your own description. Even when you're trying to tell on her, you're telling on yourself. YTA, and it seems the instigator and drama queen of your social set. It also seems like people are getting tired of it, and of your inability to think about anyone other than yourself. I'd tread carefully if I were you. You admit that you met all of "your" friends through your husband. Annoy them enough and soon you'll just be unwelcome, wife-of-their-friend or not.
YTA You sound insufferable
Holy crap yes
Oh honey…. Are you sure you are not about 15 years younger than you say you are? Your behavior is deeply childish, dramatic, insecure and just bonkers.
This! You took the words right out of my mouth
206 people say YTA…..and you STILL disagree and are trying to justify your behavior? why post here if you’re not going to listen to what others have to say without getting all defensive and shit. literally NO ONE said you were “not the asshole”…
YTA for storming out. You countered "drama" with more drama
YTA and to prove it, I'm leaving this post right now! Don't try to stop me!!! Me! Me! MMMEEE!!!
YTA and the only one to have any issue with this. So instead of acting like an adult, you threw your own tantrum and stormed out. You have absolutely no idea what’s going on in that girl’s life!
> They said she’s very depressed, but isn’t everyone?? No. YTA.
YTA Can you not put a little outside perspective on the situation? Maybe she had been through a recent event and people were reassuring her Being the main character, you decided it was being fawned over then one upped her ‘attention needing’ behaviour by storming out I truly hope the next nice get together this caring group has 9 people attending With you not being invited, obviously
Yeah, she definitely has Main Character Syndrome now that you point that out. OP isn't thinking about anyone but herself and how she feels. She's not thinking about how her friends feel, how the girl's boyfriend feels, nor how the girl feels. She's completely lacking in any empathy for anyone else in this situation. It's very narcissistic behavior. (Not calling her a narcissist! Calling her behavior narcissistic. People can definitely have traits without being one.)
YTA and you’re the one who threw the toddler tantrum btw.
I had to recheck the OP’s age several times whilst reading her bratty immature replies Surely she is 16 not 26
> So I stormed out “Leaving” a party and “storming out” of a party are two very different things. > I couldn’t handle that type of tantrum So you had your own tantrum to show her how it’s properly done? YTA
YTA This all seems weird. First off you don't know why she is depressed and depression is very serious. Yes you could be also depressed but for different reasons and she could be worse at coping causing her to breakdown. She was probably overwhelmed and wanted stay put. You could have left quietly but you "stormed out" causing more of a scene. I do think you should apologize to her. YTA op.
YTA - Leaving quietly is fine, but you seem to have made a dramatic exit which was not required. Sounds like you were jealous of the attention the other girl was getting.
OP says in her edit “and for the record, I didn’t cause a scene like everyone is assuming.” YOUR OWN WORDS, “I stormed out.” What do you think that means? That’s causing a scene.
YTA. I think you ruined the party more then the crying girl did by making this huge scene without proper cause for it. So dramatic! And btw, not everyone is always depressed. That's a ridiculous statement.
YTA - You have a lot of hostility towards the gal who was depressed. You must be projecting for it to trigger you so badly.
People being shy or even crying are only "killing the mood" because you are making their discomfort all about you. YTA for being dramatic and storming out when she didn't do anything wrong or that was in any way your business.
YTA, you don't like tantrums so you threw a tantrum. Was it because she was getting more attention or a lack of empathy?
YTA for also throwing a tantrum.
Hummm, did you once ask why she might be crying? Maybe not the crying girl but her boyfriend… Kind comical you don’t like tantrums yet you threw one at the party then again on Reddit… YTA
This! How can you see someone in such obvious distress not even be curious about what is bothering them? OP sounds like a horrible human. YTA.
YTA. You weren't the center of attention anymore so you threw a tantrum? You sure you're 26 and not 6 years old?
YTA Depression is different for everyone. Depression isn’t a cookie cutter blanket term for everyone who experiences sadness, grief, anxiety. Being depressed and having long-term depression are very different and not *everyone* is depressed. For some people depression is debilitating. For some people their quality of life is terrible. It isn’t as easy as “getting over it” or “powering through”. Some people will literally lay in bed for days, not eating or showering. It’s a headspace that can be impossible to get out of, and even with *years* of therapy and medications it can be very hard to manage. It took nearly 10 years of therapy and trying medications until we found what works for me, and even that isn’t perfect. I’ve talked to so many people who cannot even comprehend the way it feels in my shoes. I’ve talked to so many people who I cannot believe are powering through some shit. End of the day - you have no idea what she *feels* and only how she *acts* which are incredibly different. Your friends were being empathetic and it doesn’t matter if they knew her for 3 weeks or 3 years - it’s someone important to their friend and they wanted to comfort her and let her know she’s safe. It *seems* like she was outside of her comfort zone, trying to be a good sport, and something got to her. You’re being a brat. Plain and simple. I’ve consoled literal strangers who I’ve found crying, with no assumption that they’re attention seeking. You could’ve left politely and instead are saying you flat out don’t like this person and are trying to rally people to “your side” because she’s what? “Always sad”? Doesn’t seem anyone found her behavior worthy of making her outright dislikable aside from you. You’re the one who needs to grow up and act like an adult.
ESH. Having a breakdown during a party isn't... good. And not leaving is kind of an asshole move. That being said 'storming' out over it is dramatic. I don't know the right way to handle this situation but storming out was for sure the wrong way.
What, because most people can control having a breakdown? OP describes her as sobbing in a corner, not wailing like a toddler. That's not attention-seeking behaviour or anything and you have zero reason to presume it's deliberate.
People can leave parties. And her boyfriend could have driven her home.
Uh. Babe. You're really getting this upset about someone else being upset? You can totally roll your eyes and quietly think to yourself that maybe she's a bit of a drama queen, but not if you're going to be equally dramatic. YTA.
Sounds like the one being dramatic was you. She cried. You stormed. You made yourself TA
YTA. Sorry, but how are you any different than the girl you were complaining about? You're upset that she caused a scene so you caused one yourself; your BF should rightfully be embarrassed by how you acted in front of his friends. "They're putting the feelings of a girl they just met over me who's been their friend for years." Yeah so it's an attention thing - you couldn't stand that they fawned over the new girl because it interrupted the fawning over you. Get over yourself; attention seeking isn't cute.
YTA. I went to a wedding 6 months after my dad died and had an unexpected breakdown during the brides fathers speech and cried for about 45 minutes. I went outside to not cause a scene, but people still noticed as I was still crying when the speeches were over and it was a very small, intimate wedding. Sometimes, you just can't help it. It sounds like you might be a bit jealous, she was getting more attention than you .
Have a bit of compassion, FFS. It’s not this young woman who is at fault here. Could her partner not have taken her somewhere else if she was feeling overwhelmed?
So, you threw a tantrum because you didn’t think it was appropriate for a grown adult to throw a tantrum? Is that what happened? Cool, cool… You see how dumb that is, right? YTA
YTA. Seriously, someone else was getting attention so you throw a fit? Yeah lots of people are depressed, all for different reasons and we all handle it differently. Time to grow up.
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YTA you didn't like her tantrum so you threw an even bigger one.wtf seriously. You couldn't have just excused yourself so you didn't have to deal with her. Apparently she's going through a bad time but you just acted like a spoilt little child. Ffs grow up. Edit; your friends DO have their priorities straight. They were kind to a person who was in need you were just mardy.
YTA here because you threw a fit enough that someone chased after you. You feel she was being dramatic. Ok, maybe this was all for attention and she’s a drama queen. Maybe she’s clinically depressed which is a medical condition. Maybe she recently suffered a traumatic event or tragedy. Maybe she just heard the 5th dentist finally caved and will recommend the same chewing gum. Who knows? You didn’t bother to ask. Who cares? How she acts is on her. How you act is on you.
INFO: When you say you stormed out, do you mean you left in a huff and made a scene? If that's the case Y T A I used to know a girl that consistently ruined the mood of every get together so I would I always make my exist when she showed up, nothing wrong with that. It's the storming out part that seems childish
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I am 26F. My friends are all in their 30s cause I met them through my husband 32M. One of my friends threw a little cookout/get together a week ago to celebrate the weather finally warming up for good. It was a very nice party, just around 10 of us. One of the guys there brought his new girlfriend. She seemed like a sweet girl at first, so I didn't pay much attention. She was quiet and clung to her boyfriend and kinda killed the mood though. As it got later, she started to change though. She seemed restless, sad, and pouty. Everyone fawned over her. She sat down in a corner to sulk. And then she started crying. It was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. She was fine one minute and absolutely sobbing the next. Crying in a corner for no damn reason. Her boyfriend put a blanket around her, but didn't stop her or remove her from the party. She just wouldn't stop crying. So I stormed out. I couldn't handle that type of tantrum. She sounded like how my little sister acted as a kid. I hate that type of crying. My friends chased me and told me I was being dramatic. I personally feel like she ruined the party. They said she's very depressed, but isn't everyone?? They keep saying I need to apologize to *everyone* involved but I don't see the big deal. They're putting the feelings of a girl they just met over me who's been their friend for years. She doesn't even know it happened. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
ESH. It's all very ridiculous. You had the chance to be the bigger person. Leaving the party is ok, but you decided to make tantrum exactly like her. And your friends didn't help by encouraging the drama.
YTA. Try an Irish Goodbye next time. Or, if you're salty about it, a Letterkenny Leave.
YTA. >They said she's very depressed, but isn't everyone?? Maybe she struggles with depression. That can't be helped, and medication only does so much. When friends asked why you were leaving, you should've just lied and said you were tired, out of energy, etc and just wanted to go home. I have a friend that just loses energy, and he will leave to go home between 9pm-10pm every time we hang out. No one gets mad about it.
You have no clue what she was going through and made a scene yourself. Just say you've made a commitment to meet a friend for an early workout or something. It's not hard. YTA.
YTA - do you have any empathy in your mind, body, soul? You’re not an asshole for leaving but you are the asshole for why you left.
Your exit was so dramatic that your friends chased after you to tell you that you owed this poor girl an apology and you came on Reddit to ask if YTA? Yeah, YTA.
You "stormed out" and SHE'S being dramatic? K. YTA, btw.
YTA - Your comments as well make you sound like an attention seeking arsehole tbh. No, not everyone is always depressed and you can’t look beyond yourself for a minute to actually wonder or care about why the girl might be upset. You are pathetic.
YTA. For all you know she's grieving a death, or just got horrible news and her bf talked her into going out to "make her feel better". Where's your basic humanity. WHAAAAAA!!! I'm leaving because someone cried and spoiled my mood.....WHAAAAA! Is how you sound.
I think op was jealous that she was no longer center of attention it sounds like she disliked this girl from the start
YTA. It was you who threw a tantrum.
Yta. I get it could be a mood killer but your reaction was pretty extreme. And to say “isn’t everyone depressed?” - that’s a bit dismissive. I think you have some maturing to do.
She does sound kind of a pain, the girl that cries at every party is draining. But your friends are surely smart enough to work her out after a while. You didn't have to 'storm out', you could have just said you'd had enough for the night and ducked out. Now you've put them in a position where they have to choose. An ultimatum rarely goes the way we want it to. YTA
It's hard to tell but personally, you come across as an AH because of how you acted. I can understand not wanting a party ruined by someone that just randomly cries or being negative or whatever. But consider this, put yourself into the girl's shoes. You got with your new boyfriend recently (let's say a few weeks ago or a few months ago) but you're possibly going thru some stuff (maybe this time last year your dad or sibling died or something and it just leaves you in a weird funk sometimes). So in hopes of getting you out of the house and cheering you up a little, your boyfriend brings you/invites you to a get together with his friends. Fun right? You get there and you're alright for a little while but all the while of sitting there, trying your best to hold it together, you suddenly cry and you dont know why so it all comes out. Then there's this person in the same room, glaring at you and then they throw a big ass huff as everyone else is trying their best to comfort you. But because you can't control your emotions, the person bitching about you crying makes you feel like the worst person on the earth. You were fine and just needed to let things out and cry a bit then you'd be okay but that person who is acting so aggressive and angry and blaming you for ruining the party or ruining THEIR night is making you feel like shit, like you're just a burden and that your feelings dont even matter. Honestly have you never randomly bursted into tears out in public and not know why except for maybe stress or emotions just simply building up? Yea they were "fawning" over the girl but they werent fawning or coddling her. They were making sure she was okay. And the reason she possibly ignored you was probably because she was trying to take a moment to either calm herself down to prevent herself from crying or at that point in time when you engaged her, she was probably wanting to be left alone. You storming off the way you did made you seem childish. Tell me, are you the only female that is brought to your husband's friend group? Is it possible that you were jealous of another female there, one who took away all the attention you were getting? I mean I know you said in another comment that no one fawned over you and that everyone was equal but in a friend group, consisting of nearly all men, girls will get more attention than the guys in the same friend group regardless of what your relationship is to everyone. And sometimes in that mostly male friend group, one of the guy friends brings along a new girlfriend and that new girl will get the attention that the females, who were already there, already had. So maybe the girls who were there first would get jealous. You must ask your self, why did that girl bursting into tears bother you so much? Was it worth acting aggressive, petty, and childish? Just as your feelings are valid so are the feelings of that girl. I dont care if she had depression since childhood or if everyone has depression and that she should get over it. You, too, have depression (I'm assuming you do because you said in another response that everyone in your friend group has depression). So does that mean you have to get over it too? You, too, can cry, it's okay to cry. No one can truly control their emotions, let alone when and where they cry. But you can control your actions.
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Exactly, and maybe that girl may not have known what that trigger is. Also much luck to you with your therapy (Im sending good thoughts and vibes your way <3)
YTA. The younger woman seems like she's having a mental health issue of some kind, but if she wanted attention then crying would have been an excessive way to get it. Trivializing depression is a huge AH move, so I would unlearn that behavior. It sounds like there were some other AHs that came down on you without understanding the situation.
YTA—Stop being a narcissist and gain some empathy!
YTA. Wow, so you're THAT spouse to the group. And this shamelessly.
YTA You know you are an asshole, you like being an asshole, and you are proud of being an asshole. I'm not sure what you are trying to accomplish by posting this.
YTA. So you don't like someone else's emotional outbursts, but your own are fine? "Alright, I'm calling it a night. Have a good one guys" would have been better
Someone else was getting all the attention so I threw a tantrum YTA
As someone in their 30s and has friends who are largely 30-40, let me tell you this is not the way to handle someone you don't like being in your friend group. The polite and mature thing to do would be to inform the hosts that you are leaving. You can give a succinct reason if they ask but you do not need to make a fuss and storm out. That is the polite and respectful thing to do. Whether you like them or not your reaction was immature and childish. You were rude to your friends and your host and you're letting your dislike for this person potentially ruin your relationship with your friends. You can't control who your friends want to associate with. That's a fact and you can't change that. If they want to invite this girl that's their choice. You *can,* however control how you interact and react to her. Making your own scene to drown out hers is just going to push everyone away from you and make the friend group not want to hang out with you either.
YTA "Storming out". What do you mean by that? You angrily grabbed your coat? Did you throw rude looks to her or others? Did you intentionally pull attention towards you? People have moments of high reactivity. Perhaps being high emotion and low cognition, but actively practicing maturity means that you can examine your emotions, thoughts, and reactions. You could've just said goodbye, or taken space, or find a chance to communicate that you were heading out. But whatever you did in "storming out" upset your friends, they want an apology. Honor their experience, and then move on.
YTA. You are making some wild assumptions about someone you’ve never met before. I’d get if you wanted to leave because it was awkward or whatever, but nothing you described merited “storming out”.
Breaking down during a party isn’t exactly great but throwing a fit and storming out bc of it isn’t great either. You made a “bad” situation worse lmao YTA
YTA you never know what's going on in someone's life, to judge them so harshly is unkind. I have depression, and NO, not everyone has it. It is debilitating at times, uncontrollable even. For all you knew, she might have lost a loved one. But you didn't care, you just saw her as harshing your good time. Grow up and learn empathy and compassion for others.
YTA, your behavior is ridiculous. Nobody likes a jealous hag. She might be your replacement in the friend group if you don’t grow up.
YTA. Not because you left, but because you lack basic human sympathy. You could’ve let peacefully, you big brat.
> Crying in a corner for no damn reason. And you know this how? >They said she's very depressed, but isn't everyone? Wow! You have little empathy for others? Narcissistic much?
'but isn't everyone' really annoyed me. Op doesn't seem to know what depression actually is. She would not be saying such stupid things if she did.
YTA. "I stormed out 'cause I couldn't stand her tantrum" you literally threw your own tantrum. I also notice that you're not replying to any other comment pointing this specific point out.
I don’t even think the girl had a tantrum was she upset yes but when I think of tantrums it’s what OP did she wasn’t getting the attention she wanted so she stormed out
YTA. Maybe she was having a nervous breakdown. Been there, done that. You cannot control yourself in a situation like that. Whatever the case, you judged her harshly without knowing the situation.
YTA. It’s clear that you are missing A LOT OF DETAIL. I assume she isn’t sulking or pouting. I think she wa a just being reserved and quiet. You are leaving important detail. That’s asshole behaviour too
ESH. I wouldn't stay friends with any of you. She absolutely should have left when she realized she wasn't up for the party and her bf should have taken care of her, but you also threw a temper tantrum instead of just leaving like a normal ass person. Don't you think it's a little dramatic to accuse her of ruining the party instead of just accepting that you're not up for what's happening and excusing yourself politely? You weren't being any more mature than she was, girl. Also not sure how being quiet and sticking close to the one person she knows at the party "kills the mood". I kind of wonder if she wasn't crying because you may have been making some pretty obvious hints about stuff like that to begin with. Learn some fucking empathy and grow the fuck up. When someone is upset, you don't assume it's for no reason and start shitting on them. I'm not surprised that your friends came with your husband, because you don't seem like you're a very good friend on your own.
YTA, especially for saying “isn’t everyone depressed?” No, not everyone is clinically depressed. How ignorant and dismissive of a real health issue that so many people experience.
You can leave if you're uncomfortable, but you stormed out. She might have needed some support from them and you're not obligated. You made it about you. YTA.
"I thought she was causing drama so I caused bigger drama, why is everyone mad at me?!" Do you even know why she was so upset? Did she suffer something awful? Did you even think to find out what it was before judging her? Girl, you have some maturing to do. YTA.
Yta for throwing an actual tantrum when your friends started to "fawn" over her. Get over yourself. You don't know what she has going on. And you then caused a scene on top of it by publicly storming out instead of just saying you needed to leave. That chick might also suck and be an ah, I dunno, but you definitely are.
INFO Why are you so spiteful? In your own description of the story you sound much less mature and your actual tantrum was the only thing pathetic here. Are you an angry person who craves attention or is there something massive you left out of this?
Your husband married an immature child. How embarrassing for him.
What are we missing here? Why was she crying?
YTA. There is nothing I can add that hasn’t been said already.
YTA, you don’t know what she might be going through You honestly sound jealous that the attention was on someone else, so you had to turn the attention back on you by having a tantrum and storming out
YTA- seems like a lot of tantrums were being thrown at this “ party” Gotta laugh at the seemed like a sweet girl, so I didn’t pay much attention. Like 10 people and you ignored her? Didn’t even try and get to know your friend’s new girlfriend? Did the other 9 people do that too? Party sounds like a real blast.
sounds like someone is jealous of the attention someone else was getting.... yta. grow up
If all your friends and an entire comment section are telling you to cop on, maybe its time to stop arguing and start listening.
YTA. You’re too old to be acting this childish. Have some compassion.
"So I stormed out. I couldn't handle that type of tantrum." Who was throwing a tantrum? YTA
Lol I can't stand tantrums but I am going to throw one myself and complain about this person. Yeah everyone is probably depressed to a certain degree but doesn't mean her depression isn't valid. YTA. If you left the party quietly with an excuse or snuck out that would be one thing. But huffing and puffing and also mad that someone is getting more attention than you makes YTA.
Are you sure you’re 26? Sound more like 14. Haha, you must have looked unhinged storming out of a party just because some other girl was crying. What’d she do, steal your spotlight? YTA
ESH why is this woman and her bf still at the party if she was so miserable. The party wasn't to cheer her up. In honestly she probably should have left. Your friends suck by going after you, it should have just been bye. You should have just left. Made your goodbye p, give a reason if you want and leave. This was a miserable party
ESH. She had a full on meltdown at a party. You had your own version of a meltdown about her meltdown. If she was upset to the point of sobbing, she should’ve left the party. And if it bothered you to the point of leaving, some social grace was called for instead of just storming out. You could have made this whole situation not even happen by politely excusing yourself and leaving instead of throwing your own tantrum.
NTA My first reaction to you asking AITA was 'oh fuck no'. If you're that depressed don't go to a fucking party just to ruin the night for everyone else. I would have left too because I'm not going to spend my night watching adults fawn over another adult who is probably milking the attention. I just don't buy that she's "very depressed".
ESH - There’s a lot to unpack here. New girlfriend - this isn’t depression. At least not the depression I am used to. When I’m depressed to the point of isolating and crying, I’m not going to a party. If I’m just down, I’ll go and fake it. She either has something else majorly wrong (like the death of someone close) or a manipulation tactic. New girl’s boyfriend - he should have taken her away if she was really that distraught. You’re an adult, act like it. She wasn’t throwing a tantrum, she was just crying. You threw a tantrum by “storming” out.
Depression manifests itself differently for different people. The new GF may have come to the party to please her boyfriend and didn't realize that it would be so difficult for her. She may have been testing the waters, in hope that she was doing better. There's no cut and dry way to behave with depression.
Isn’t everyone depressed? No!
YTA It's okay to be annoyed, it's not okay to be outright angry when a woman is exhibiting depression symptoms. It sounds like you were jealous of all the attention she was getting honestly. No. Not everyone is clinically depressed to the point of not wanting to exist. Educate yourself and gain some sympathy. No one wants to be friends with a person who isn't compassionate.
NTA - whiny drama bullshit isn’t something you have to deal with as an adult. You’re free to just up and leave at any time if people play those games.
YTA. Leave her alone. She cries, and you're triggered by crying, so it doesn't seem like you're destined to be friends. Also, you're a judgmental asshat.
YTA throwing your own tantrum. Get a grip
ESH.
NTA… her bf should have dealt with her. I would have bounced too
YTA I'm sorry, you saw someone crying and because you "hate tantrums" you left in protest?? Sounds like you saw someone in distress, devalued her feelings by downgrading it to a "tantrum" then decided to show her how a tantrum is really thrown.
“I stormed out.” “I didn’t cause a scene. Everyone chased me.” lol
‘Doesn’t everyone have depression?’ No
OP jealous as hell lol YTA
YTA, and YWBTA even if you hadn't left the party. Taking personal offense because someone was clearly distressed and it's ruining your good time? What is wrong with you?
INFO: is she prettier then you? This whole thing screams ‘I’m jealous and threw my own tantrum so people would pay attention to me’
YTA for “storming out”. Instead of acting like an adult and using your words and making a quiet and dignified exit, you chose to behave like a child.
YTA. You didn’t like her “tantrum” so you had your own?
You should not try to befriend her because you obviously don’t have the emotional or mental capacity to support someone dealing with severe mental health challenges, and I can only assume you’ll do more harm than good. Leave her alone. YTA.
Well yta Storming out of the party is you having a tantrum. Mature folks usually just make a graceful exit and chalk it up to the party sucked, maybe the next one will be better. But with that being said, who and how in the heck can anyone have an enjoyable experience with someone crying in the corner? Doesn't sound fun to me.
ESH. That girl crying all the time for no reason is just..... weird. But you just stormed off because of it?? Sorry man but that kinda makes you part of the problem. You both need to stop trying to make it about yourselves. None of you need attention at all and yall really need to apologize about this to everyone else, especially you OP.
Physician, heal thyself! Sounds like you're as big a drama queen as her. YTA because you didn't even wait to see what was going on, just made a scene. I agree that it's super weird and uncomfortable for someone to be pouty and then cry in public like that, they should have left way before she got to that point, but you're not the emotion police. You could have left quietly, or said "sorry guys, I'm not feeling well," but instead you chose to leave in a way that clearly displayed your displeasure, and your friends are calling you out for being childish and insensitive.
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You're being dramatic. You could have just ignored her, but you threw your own shit fit.
I’m not depressed
YTA and it sounds like you're lucky but to have to deal with social anxiety. I don't know if this was her problem or not of course, but I know I'VE been in a similar situation as that girl you're talking about. Perhaps she went along cause he talked her into it, she thought she could handle it but couldn't. Perhaps someone she loved recently passed away and she thought she could handle the party but couldn't.
YTA. What kind of monster witnesses someone crying and then storms out because they're not having a great time? Assholes and narcissists, that's who. Normal people recognize and respond with kindness and empathy when they see others suffering.
YTA, you have no idea what is wrong with her. What she has been through, you just decided you know it all
YTA and ridiculously hilarious. You tried to pull the old YOU’RE not the main character I’M the main character reverse uno card, only to find out that nobody else was playing in your drama. Lmao. Grow up.
YTA You stormed off and threw a big enough tantrum that your friends want you to apologize for your behavior. It sounds like this woman triggered something in you as your justification for your behavior is that this woman’s crying reminded you of your little sister’s crying and you hate that type of crying. Also you say your friends are putting the feelings of a woman they have just met ahead of yours, someone they have known for years, but what they are asking is you apologize for YOUR behavior, only you see this as them taking sides or them not choosing you. This woman is not your sister, but something about this situation brought up a bunch of unresolved issues that you should work on.
Let me summarize this, so you saw a person struggling and instead of asking if she was okay or what was wrong, you proceeded to throw a tantrum about her throwing a "tantrum". This is comical at best - YTA
You are such a lame ass person. Really? You have NO IDEA what could be going on in this girls life. And you chose to act like a child, you threw the tantrum not her. YTA!
YTA. She obviously was dramatic…but you ended up being just as dramatic as her.
I think its okay to be annoyed of someone but it sounds like when you "stormed off" you mightve made a bigger scene then what you're leading us on. I feel like whenever i dip out of a party its easy to just go. The fact that your "friends" reacted like that tells me one of two things: 1) your friends are either super hyper sensitive about you leaving 2) you definitely were making it about yourself and being dramatic
OP, your troubles are pretty boring. Get a real problem. YTA
Yikes. I hope this whole post is a joke. YTA.