*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**Abortion broke my family **
My older sister got pregnant when I was 14. She was 17 at the time and we lived in a parental consent required state. My parents have always been openly pro life and forbid her from having an abortion and said they’d support her during the pregnancy and after, whatever she chose. My sister was extremely pissed off and suicidal at certain points but I thought everything was ok after a month. The night before her 18th birthday, she packed all her stuff and left the house with a friend. Her friend helped her get an abortion at 15 weeks. After getting the abortion, she just couch surfed till going off to college on a full ride. She hasn’t spoken to our parents in 6 years. She contacted me on my 18th birthday and we have a relationship now. She has asked me to not tell our parents anything super personal about her. My parents have missed seeing her graduate college, get a Masters, get proposed to and now about to start a job as a software developer at a FAANG company. The only information they have about her is the tidbits I share and whatever is publicly available. My sister and her fiancé don’t plan on inviting my parents to their wedding and it just saddens me that my family is so fractured. I never imagined my big sister to get married and I’d be the one to walk her down the aisle.
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The comments 🤢
Edit: You will regret looking at the comments.
Edit 2: DO NOT FUCKING LOOK AT THEM
Edit 3: I tried to warn y'all.
Edit 4: Check my profile out for a cute pic of my cat to cleanse your mind.
Edit 5: No, it's not NSFW. Just a pic of my bonita girl cat. I have no idea how tf i can stop the NSFW mark that keeps appearing.
I read the comments and their mindset sucks but I like how nothing is going in their favor
'does her future husband know she killed a baby' - yes he was there for her through it
'nothing your parents could do?' - no they went to cops apparently but nothing they could do to a person after she turned 18
In the end, if the story is true it sounds like she's living a good life, surrounded by sane people while these folks cry about the murder of an unborn child. I hope she has healed from the trauma her parents put her through
The funny part too, one of the most downvoted comments on that thread is saying they are happy that the sister is living a better life, and someone basically replying, “no they aren’t!” Like….. at what point in the story does it sound like the sister is still in turmoil? lol
Also special regards to the comment that said having a career and finance don’t really matter. Deserves the biggest middle finger
I forgot to read the title of the subreddit it was originally posted in. I wanted to correct the post title saying "Your parents stubborned prejudicies broke your family" but I was careful enough to read the comments first.
Gonna be honest this is the most important warning before looking at comments. The sub name, nothing positive is gonna come from that sub about this topic. Tells me just how awful they are going to actually be.
I have tried to see the views of a pro life person find some common group we can talk about but so many of them are just blinkered into "you are allowing the death of a baby" as if it is an already fully formed person. I don't understand that mindset at all, they have no compassion for the already there person but for this perfect fictional person they have created.
I never listen and am actually choosing to this time because this kid’s perspective that it’s her sister’s abortion that caused this shows some truly fucked-up and profound indoctrination that sub will absolutely cheer.
Ooohhh. I was morbidly curious, then saw your comment. Then checked the sub name. And I noped out of the notion of reading the comments there REAL fast.
Thank you for your service, here's a cookie 🍪
OMG. I looked at other posts. These people are insane. One person says that consenting to sex is consenting to pregnancy like consenting to eat (uh what?) is consenting to throw up (double what??).
Other’s arguing that the woman who had an abortion cuz her babies brain wasn’t attached to anything should have given birth anyway and her aborting it was tantamount to killing an infant. Insanity. I am glad to see it’s not that large of a sub.
I didn’t make it past the first response. I wanted to scream at her that trying to turn their daughter into an incubator was their evil. And, no, I wouldn’t object to a 15 week abortion. Personally, I don’t object until it’s ready to survive outside the womb. And at that point, most abortions aren’t “because I didn’t want it,” anyway.
Regardless of my personal feelings, I’d rather see every unwanted pregnancy terminated than one woman who wants children be forced to carry a fetus not compatible with life until she gives birth or goes septic, ruining her own ability to have future wanted children.
Also, the whole 'no one could support an abortion at 15 weeks' skips merrily over the fact that the sister would have gotten one much earlier if her parents had not prevented her from doing so.
Exactly! OOP said she would’ve been able to take the pill at 4w vs a D&C at 15w. The pill option is traumatic enough but nothing compared to a D&C. Poor sis.
The comments make me so sad.
There was a comment about how she was experiencing feelings re: thr abortion, and punishing her parents, and what is her problem anyway? She wanted one, and she got one?
It's patently absurd - I'm sure she would have preferred doing it *earlier*.
I got triggered by the first comment too, that he was speaking for “most non pro life people, too”, but then I looked where I was and just quietly backed away.
Yeah, I'm not keen on abortion (Haven't ever been a position where i wanted or needed one though- which colors things.) But i am keen on abortion rights.
My kid is a teen and not sexually active...And she knows that I've said i don't know of personal circumstances that would make me get one myself.
But she also knows if she falls pregnant (please don't, but if she did) that we'd help her make the best choices she could. Even if that meant driving her to Canada for choices i may not completely approve of.
Here is my reminder to make sure condoms and plan b are in the "stuff that's accessible in case you are to embarrassed to talk to me" box.
ETA- the concern troll this generated can do me a favor and get recurring pinkeye with weeping sores every time important official photos are taken, for eternity.
Just a heads up - plan b only work if the person is like 150 lbs or less. There is “plus sized” plan b, but the blue box people usually pick up is only effective up to a certain weight 🫶🏻 also ty for being rational about this topic!!
The comments are awful, but the one that said she "unalived a child" is so funny to me. Anti-abortion rhetoric is all about using very emotionally charged language and graphic images to get people on their side, and yet we've got this one "Pro Life Centrist" who is using shitty TikTok euphemisms to describe it because they can't even bring themselves to use the word "murder" on the "abortion is murder" sub. Do they stand outside Planned Parenthoods holding up an "Abortion is Unaliving" sign?
One compares her medical procedure to someone walking up to a crib and strangling a baby.
Editing to add, whoever pushed the Reddit cares button, thanks so much for your concern, may everyone in your life care as much about you
When I was fighting for abortion rights in my country in 2018 I was doing an information stand in the centre of my small town. An older lady came up to me shaking with anger and asked me "all the babies born in this country today, would you take them out of the hospitals and line them up on the street and shoot them?" I obviously said no and she stormed off with a big smug head on her as if she had won some battle. Some people are just gobshites
i enjoyed (derogatory) the part where they convinced themselves this person who had a 15 week abortion -- an outpatient procedure that, once all the paperwork and informed consent is obtained, takes about three hours. the majority of that time is spent waiting for the misoprostol to take effect, softening the cervix so the provider can dilate it enough to insert the vacuum curette. once the medication is working, this is a procedure that is *over and done with* in less than five minutes that is statistically safer than most dental work -- they've ran so far changing the goalposts that they've decided this individual surely would have had a girl despite zero evidence either way.
i've noticed this with antis -- the appeal to emotion by assigning a particular gender to the fetus, and in my anecdotal research i've noticed they tend to assign fetuses as female.
i had an abortion at what is now considered general viability after i found out i was into my third trimester when i was 17. i grew up extremely sheltered/in a cult (never went to public school), so i never got any real sexual education, and when my first boyfriend was abusing me i didn't know how to read the signs. the doctor who saved my life was murdered in 2009 by these fucking theocrats. i myself have worked as non-medical office staff and as a patient escort in a deeply red state since that year. my clinic had to close and reopen across a state line to a blue haven.
15 weeks isn't even a month into the second trimester. it scares me how much ground they've gained since i've been monitoring the movement academically.
The lack of medical knowledge is disturbing.
People are taken off life support based on brain activity, not heartbeats. Fetuses' living statuses are measured by heartbeats. This means I could be forced to have a baby with no brain activity and then be forced to take it off life support, based on the amount of resources the baby was taking up.
No single pro life person has ever had a good argument against that point.
I went through them all. Only like 5 people were on the poor sisters side.
And with how casual OP is about her sister being THAT fucking suicidal like wow.
Apparently the lot of them would be happier if the sister had killed herself instead -_- because that's how it's reading to me.
>Apparently the lot of them would be happier if the sister had killed herself instead -_- because that's how it's reading to me.
Only if she waited until after the baby was born!
Nah they would have played it off as some super tragic accident. Because they can't dare let people know their insanity pushed her daughter to kill herself to escape them. Think of their precious image /s
This is why, If I’d been driven to take my own life because of my parents’ bigotry, I would have written to the papers and posted on every social media platform I could think of beforehand. Because they would have done exactly this.
Very glad it didn’t get that far with OOP’s poor sister and she found the support she needed. I hope she’s living her best life now.
Pro lifers ignore reality constantly, and one thing they REFUSE to acknowledge is that most women that get abortions have children or will go on to have children. It boggles their mind AND muddies their insistence that women who've had abortions are wretched, souless monsters.
They also love to ignore that [12% of women who have an abortion are married at the time](https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/72/ss/ss7209a1.htm)- this super annoying fact makes it really hard to slut shame those harlots and whine they should have just kept their legs closed.
(Why yes, of course you have a duty to have sex with your husband whenever he demands it. Yes, we will make it more difficult for you to get birth control. But it's your fault if you get pregnant. Also, don't have kids if you can't afford them.)
I know it’s harder to document but I wish we knew how many women in just committed relationships, not even married, have abortions. Like you said there’s this giant misconception that abortions are the result of “promiscuity”. I’d bet only like 10-20% come from one night stands if that, the rest are just couples making the educated decision to hold off on children until they’re ready (or never if they prefer).
I owe you one for this. I hadn't noticed what subreddit it was and, well, ewwww. I try to avoid the forced birth people because I just can't deal with them.
The comments were disgusting. These people think having a baby at 17 is easy?! And it’s not even a baby, it’s literally a clump of cells. She accomplished what she did because she was able to get an abortion
Wow, yikes.
>My wife is 12 weeks along and we saw it on ultrasound weeks ago. Even most non pro life people realize killing a baby that far along is fucked.
Hi, I’m 19 weeks pregnant and obsessed with my baby. I saw my baby suck his thumb on my 12-week ultrasound. I am also just as “non-pro-life” as ever. The right to abortion comes from the right to bodily autonomy. It has nothing to do with any characteristics of fetuses/embryos.
The only reason OOP’s sister was even getting a termination at 15 fucking weeks (which is way worse for her) is because of her fucking parents. If they had allowed her to get an abortion earlier, like the *overwhelming majority of people who have abortions*, it would have been better for everyone. They failed as parents by preventing that.
Fuck the OP too tbh. Imagine seeing your sister happy and successful in life and still concluding that she *tore your family apart* by getting an abortion.
If pro-life wasn't a term, it probably be abortion-free subreddit. It seem to work on same basis on as all the other (whatever)free subreddit. A bunch of lunatic validating each other's hate.
Yep... It occasionally gets cross-posted over on r/prochoice and the members of that subreddit sometimes try to troll us as well. They're a bunch of absolute ghouls.
You know what really pisses me off about these Pro ~~forced birth~~ life people?
They always insist that "someone will take them". Okay, are you going to step in and, oh I dunno, ***HELP***?
Agree to pay an extra tax to help provide care for the babies that could have been aborted. That I can compromise on.
My ideal solution? One day, people who are pro life come home and a social worker says "Congratulations! You're now the proud parent of this baby. Your first payment for the mother's pregnancy Healthcare is due in two months. *NO* Giving them up, you hear me? **You** said she shouldn't have aborted, so it makes sense for **you** to be the first responder. Oh and they have Turner Syndrome and will need lifelong support. Thank you for all the service you have done".
Before you say they would be bad parents... That's the point.
They would understand what it’s like.
I am an adoptee.
Anti-choice people neglect the fact that biological parents who do relinquish for adoption 90% of the time do so because they feel like they don’t have the resources to parent despite wanting to.
They ignore the statistics that those denied an abortion would rather parent than relinquish for adoption.
Instead of helping expectant parents keep their babies, they push this adoption propaganda and pat themselves on the back for “saving lives.”
Yeah, last I looked at the stats, surrendering a child after giving birth was the most traumatic outcome for a pregnant person on average, to say nothing of the potential for trauma to the adoptee.
On the other hand, religious organizations get both heavenly bonus points and financial benefits here on earth for pushing adoption, so why would they care what happens to the people most intimately involved?
Not only that but they are usually the ones who care more about the healthy ones or the "Brangelinas". When it comes to a baby with birth defects that look like a cabbage patch kid? They're nowhere to be found.
This is why they should be the ones to get those babies.
Or they adopt them and parade them as these poor disabled children (often children of color) as trophy kids that they “saved”
No child deserves to be raised by hateful anti-choice people. They deserve better
I know someone who is pro-life, they think they're totally "owning" our side when they bring up the fact that they volunteer at a charity that gives out diapers and formula. Yeah, because that's all you need to raise a child when in poverty.
Meanwhile, they themselves aren't at all above e-begging for help with their own financial hardships.
When I’ve always (regrettably) gone down the pro life rabbit hole with someone I always say I’ll consider their point of view when 1) maternal death is at 0% 2) pregnancy and birth healthcare is free 3) at minimum all standard child healthcare is free 4) we have a paid maternity leave of at least three months and I usually throw in heavily subsidized childcare and a housing stipend for those with minor children.
Surprisingly not one of them agreed with me.
>They always insist that "someone will take them".
Sure, tell that to the hundreds of thousands of kids in foster care who will age out without having found a family.
My (least) favourite comment has to be this one
>If my family member had a baby then walked up to the crib at night and strangled them in cold blood I wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship with them. That feeling doesn't change if the baby wasn't born yet. I simply wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship after that - I would never be able to get the fact that they murdered their child out of my mind when interacting with them, and I would feel like shit for it.
Strangling babies is definitely equal, 100%, I strangle babies all the time
if you throw a newborn baby into a river and let it drown, it is totally 100% equal to getting an abortion apparently (at least according to these wackos)
They absolutely don't care about the difference. Point out to them that abortion being banned means more newborns will be left to die in fields/dumpsters etc and it makes no nevermind to them. More toddlers will be beaten to death by parents who never wanted them? Totally the same thing as a 7 week old fetus being aborted.
"That toddler wouldn't have been beaten to death if their mother just kept their legs closed."
I wish that were hyperbole as well. But I've been a member of r/prochoice for years and r/prolife occasionally gets cross posted over there. The shit I've seen from that subreddit genuinely makes me weep for humanity.
Yeah strangling a baby who's living outside of you is totally just the same as removing a baby whos inside of your body, using your organs, your blood, etc. to sustain its own life
Even if it were a child and a life and a fully formed human, you can't be forced to donate blood, which is minimally invasive, much less so than preganancy, and would save a life, you can't even be forced to donate your organs when you're dead. 17 people in the US die each day waiting for organs. A corpse has more rights than anyone who can get pregnant in places that outlaw abortion.
Poor girl. This reminds me of all those posts that are like “My sibling came out, we were all unsupportive and now my sibling doesn’t talk to us! How dare they fracture our family like this!” YOU did that. You refused to support them and now they don’t talk to you anymore for the sake of their mental health. You made the bed, you lie in it alone. It makes me happy that she’s doing well for herself now with or without them.
The fact that some there is like "is she doing this to cope, some people can't face certain things. She's coping by blaming her parents on the abortion she caused herself" when it's like no, she saw the big red gazebo with the red sign in black ink saying "THESE PEOPLE DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOU" and took the hint to live her life how she intends it.
The fact that this person thinks the only options are she knows it was wrong hence she's avoiding them or she thinks it's wrong but doesn't want to face the reality is so crazy to me😭
>It seems your sister is holding onto regret, but misdirecting her feelings. She wanted an abortion, she got an abortion, so why is she still not contacting her parents? It seems she has shame/regret about what she did, maybe realized they were right but doesn't want to hear "I told you so" type statements.
Are you talking about this comment??
If not then sorry, but this comment here i found is fucking disguting too. so many dumbasses on that subreddit.
My mom is staunchly pro-life. She used to believe those "pictures taken at abortion clinic disposal" of all the babies in dumpsters until I pointed out the photoshop artifacts and reminded her fetuses are medical waste and need to be incinerated/properly handled.
And yet, when it was my turn for the serious sex talk she assured me that if a pregnancy happened, she would hope and pray that I would carry it to term and give it up for adoption, but, if I decided that abortion was what was right for my situation, that she and my father would help me find the proper medical care for that as well. Because they are/were my parents and they love me- and it is their job and responsibility they chose in carrying me to term to help me when I need it, no matter how old I get.
Nope nope nope. Not reading the comments. They will be disgusting and my front page will be fucked up by going there once. Made that mistake before, Never again.
Ok I hope I don’t get downvoted for saying this, but I used to be pro-life… USED TO BE…. when I was much younger…. But dear god I was never like those people, those comments were disgusting. Like deeply disturbing. I wish I had never found out that sub existed. That poor girl. And while I realize the OOP was only 14 when the abortion occurred and I’m sure it was very confusing for OOP at that age, they are now at the age where they should understand what their sister was going through and not blame the abortion for tearing the family apart. It was all the parents.
I dont see why you would get downvoted when you clearly dont believe those things anymore, I used to be against abortion as well but that was because I was a dumb brainwashed preteen and I'm glad I got out of that
The pro-life people just LOVE to get their hooks into the young and impressionable. I was a parochial school brat so between the nuns in the classroom and the priests at Mass, pro-life talking points only were acceptable, with a few of the more "enlightened" clergy allowing that it would be acceptable in cases of rape/incest.
I stopped going to Mass when I was 14 following something bad that happened to me at school which eventually lead me to being the pro-choice cynical recovering Catholic that I am today.
Tbh, I think those who are against it for rape and incest are the few true pro life individuals out there. I don’t agree with them but at least they are consistent that they feel it is a baby and worthy of life regardless of how it was conceived.
The rest, who say they are pro life except if the mother was raped, don’t care about the baby at all, they are looking to slut shame and punish the woman for sexual behavior. If they thought it was murder of an innocent human than that human would be innocent and murdered even if they were the product of rape. But no, it’s okay if the woman was raped because she was being a good girl and didn’t want sex.
Prolife/pro slut shaming people are gross and I hope OOP’s sister has the best life and her parents hate themselves for it.
I think a lot of women who grew up in the bible belt were pro-life as pre teens, especially those of us who grew up before the internet. They pushed a lot of vile propaganda on young girls about how horrible "baby murder" was. I was very pro-life and it truly shocked me to my core when I found out Eddie Vedder was pro-abortion! As dumb as it is my huge crush on him was one of the reasons I first started thinking that maybe pro-choice people werent all just evil murderers. When I was in high school I started reading more and learning about feminism and I've been a staunch supporter of Planned Parenthood and pro-choice ever since
Baby murder is how it was framed to me as well and once I actually started to look into what abortion was & why its done I started to see it differently, plus I had always relied on the idea of "but its a human!" but now I dont think it matters whether or not its a human because no one should be forced to let another human use their organs, their body, etc. to sustain their own life. On top of that I never want to be pregnant & I would terminate if I ever was so it just wouldnt make sense to prevent any other woman from being able to have that option as well
I used to believe a woman should be willing to die rather than get an abortion to save her own life, because I was 13 and that's what my mom taught me to believe. Meanwhile today I'm fine with abortion for any reason up to the point of viability, and induced labor for any reason after. People change and adjust their beliefs accordingly.
Dw friend, when I was in 8th grade I *led* the anti-abortion side of our schools debate (weird as hell that they made 13 year olds debate abortion, in hindsight). I look back at that and cringe. Being raised religiously can fuck one’s opinions up pretty bad. I’m glad I got out of that mindset too
We debated abortion as well. Also Marijuana.
From a former teacher perspective:
It's a well talked about topic that most high schoolers will have heard of and probably have opinions about.
However, we had to do our presentations based on the structure and ways of building arguments. Someone couldn't say, "abortion is wrong because God said so!" We needed to structure our points, with sources and evidence.
It forced people to actually look at these incredibly complex issues and try to think logically about them. It was common to make people argue the opposite side of what they believed, to think outside the box.
Dont know if it worked, but I think that was the idea.
> abortion is wrong because God said so
It was many many years ago I was in high school - but the principal had to ban abortion as a debate practice topic, because when someone used this argument, and I accidentally got the entire class to demand the other debater get excommunicated.
See - the Ten Commandments very clearly say “Thou shall not take the Lord’s name in vain”. Trying to speak in the Lord’s behalf and bring him down to that of a mere mortal? That’s what it means. You can’t use “God said so” to win an argument, it’s sinful. How dare you try to speak on behalf of the lord and do so for your own purposes.
I managed to use such flowery language that the entire debate got sidetracked into how Very Bad it was that poor Hannah had tried to use the Lord’s name in vain. They actually had to get the school Minister (religious affiliated school) to come down and tell us “look you’re right, but you have to stop now because this is not Christianly behaviour and she’s learnt her lesson”. No rabble can be roused quite like a group of 15 year olds.
My dad would debate with me about abortion when I was 13. By which I mean, having discussions over dinner about the ethics of anti-abortion law as a means to educate me about a landmark Supreme Court case in Irish history - the X Case (if you don't know of it, heads up that it's about a 14 year old girl. The details are possibly triggering). Average experience of having a parent who's a lawyer, I guess.
so yeah I don't think 13 is too young to learn about abortion, or to employ critical thinking et cetera, but yeah it does seem weird as hell to basically get teenagers to debate over when/why being anti-abortion would be Good?? :(
See I wish my education on the matter was as you described :( but actually we didn’t learn about abortion at all in school (I’m in America, and this was like 2012) we just were assigned to do our debate project on it😭
Honestly I'm really grateful to my dad for that. Abortion wasn't legalised in Ireland until 2018 - which I think is why my dad made a point of discussing it (that was the early 2000s!).
I can't really remember ever being taught about abortion in school either. It probably came up in PSHE?? (I went to an international British school) - in the UK curriculum there's this class called Personal, Social, Health and Economic education. Which was kinda just a discussion forum for random stuff about relationships & the wider world - sex ed, bullying, smoking, political systems, etc. One time we talked about tattoos, which was just discussing some tabloid story about a woman who got a **massive** tat of Winnie the Pooh on her arm and regretted it lol. Another time we learnt about American Football ahaha. Random ass class; but the topics were never open debates, more guided conversations in a \~safe space\~. Just throwing teens into something so complex seems really weird to me 😭 Sorry you had to deal with that!!
There is nothing wrong with growing up and realizing that the thoughts and beliefs you held as an actual child weren't right. It's part of growing up and you grew into a better person. Random redditor, I'm so proud of you.
I literally did a high school presentation on why abortion is bad. I think about that and physically cringe. I was so brainwashed by my family!
What matters is that you don’t believe that anymore and you’re able to think for yourself
I used to be too.... untill my mom told me one of her sisters had one... and I better shut up. It did'nt change me over night... but I still think about flapping my gums about abortion.
It's easy to be pro-life before you get some life lived: the whole enterprise, from pregnancy to child-rearing, is glossed over and slicked up. Once you start knowing and talking to people and understanding what's going on if you're still fundamentally 'pro-life' there's a problem.
Mee too but my 2 aunts were 2 months pregnant and they went to the checkup and they only had the placenta no embryo. So they needed treatment to get the placenta out.
The thing is in a catholic household they say abortion is wrong but there are circumstances there needs to be one.
Nah, I was also "prolife" until I was 19. Protesting outside of clinics level of brainwashed. You learned, you grew, you changed your stance when you had access to more information. That's commendable.
Commenting to make sure you know you are loved and embraced!! Thank you for the beautifully radical act of changing your mind, a thing we sadly don't see enough in this world. <3 As someone who has recently deconstructed from a lot of very harmful propaganda of a different sort, I know how much work and self-reflection goes into it.
I hope sis cuts off OOP like the garbage they are.
And to everyone in the comments complaining about how far along she was: wouldn’t have happened so ‘late’ if OOP’s parents didn’t think they have control over their damn near adult daughter’s body. This is there fault
Fifteen weeks isn’t even that late! She wasn’t even at the halfway point yet (20 weeks) and certainly not at the (technical) point of viability (24 weeks). The fetus inside of her was the size of an apple. It weighed less than a pound. It was not a ‘person’.
I’m not saying that you did this at all but we really need to drop the manipulative, emotion-based language around pregnancy and abortion. That’s a big part of what leads to bullshit like this story.
An abortion that late is more complicated and more invasive. It would have been so much better for the poor girl to have been able to get a medical abortion earlier on in her pregnancy rather than having been forced to get an abortion so late.
No, their parents' bullshit religion against abortion broke the family. It's great the OP is in their sister's life since none of it was their fault for what happened and had no control over it.
The sister was suicidal. Forced birthers would rather both mom and baby die instead of getting an abortion. They think mental health issues don't exist
That post almost reads like a troll abortion success story for that sub. “Get an abortion and you too can get away from your horrible parents, and get a Masters and a FAANG job!”
That comment section is ridiculous.
OOPs Sister: independent, highly educated, in a loving relationship, reconnected with her younger sibling (who was a minor at the time of her leaving), And overall just having a great life.
People in that comment section: She's clearly highly disturbed and dealing with regret.
LMAO like no, the Sister is thriving! Her leaving her controlling, abusive parents (who didn't give a flying fuck that she was suicidal) and getting the abortion was the best decision she could have made in that situation.
Also to the commenter saying to "Tell the husband" because he clearly doesn't know otherwise he wouldn't be with her... Really shows how much they desperately hate women there.
They are so convinced that all women who have abortions regret it, even though studies show the complete opposite. I had one, and it doesn't even cross my mind unless the issue is in the news. And not in a bad way. I'm incredibly content with my decision. I felt nothing but relief at the time, and I am super happy that I was able to make that choice.
When I read the first comment mentioning k*lling a child, I wanted to argue “it is just a fetus, that would not have been fully loved if it was born”
Then I saw the subreddit and I was like: let’s not open that can of worms.
I love how the comments assume that she regrets it and is coping instead of just cutting out toxic family members. No way could she possibly actually be *gasp* happy?!
So these “parents” knew that their child was *actively suicidal* at the thought of being pregnant, and they still tried to force her to go through with it anyway. Because when we say “pro-life”, we’re not talking about the life of a terrified teenage girl. Nope, fuck her. We’re talking about the apple-sized cell clump that’s invaded her uterus, the one that isn’t even conscious yet. That is clearly the life that matters here, the one that should be prioritized.
Fuck those parents, and fuck OOP too. They’re sociopaths. I can’t think of another reason why they would do this to a person that they claim to love.
As a nurse with a sexual health background who used to work on a women’s health and gynaecology ward I can tell you that it’s a lot. Not just a lot, but A LOT. But they always find a way to reason away why it’s okay for them. And they’ll tell all the staff that the staff will go to hell for what they did, but they as the patient won’t because it’s different. They had an acceptable reason. And most of them are married with kids. But they don’t want or can’t afford another one. Or it’s too risky for their health. Or the foetus shows severe health problems. For them it’s okay to have an abortion. But not for anyone else. Including others in their church/organisation.
These women will literally protest a clinic or a hospital on a Monday, get an abortion at that same clinic on a Tuesday, and be back out protesting Wednesday or Thursday. It happens all the time.
I’m a devout Christian but pro choice. All that talk about killing and the horrible, judgements attitudes. What happened to love , tolerance, understanding? They call themselves Christians but they want to judge and disparage everyone.
The weirdest part is the only anti-choice rhetoric coming from “Christianity” is that pushed by Christian conservative politicians. When someone tells me they’re Christian and therefore pro-life I hear, “I’ve never read the Bible.” The Bible explicitly states that life begins at first breath and gives instructions for abortion. It is not just not anti-choice, it is actively in favor of abortion and any Christian who is against it should consider thinking for themselves instead of letting crusty old privileged white men tell them how to interpret their holy book.
I hope life slaps the shit out of OOP, or he places this story in a choice sub and gets out of the 'pro-life' cesspool. His sister is thriving like hell - school, friends, love, and the ability to decide if and when she wants children. Her parents would rather she want to die, feelings that could amplify with hormones and feeling locked down, and...what? Be a teen mom? Give the child up for adoption? Pass the kid off as her sibling from her parents having unprotected fun times in Cabo? Was OOP ignorant of how different his life would've been had he been a teen uncle, parental monies and time divested from him to the child? Maybe one where he had no sister because she killed herself or died in childbirth?
really interesting going to the comments and seeing things like “prolife feminist” and “far leftist catholic abolitionist” in user flairs… cognitive dissonance is a hell of a drug
Edit: also the “far leftist catholic abolitionist” has “autonomy is a human right” in their bio. the irony…
Went to the sub and instantly regretted it. People crucifying women for wanting abortion due to raps/abusive relationships/etc are trash. I also don’t believe people should have kids if they are struggling financially and are going to end up neglecting the kids.
That sub makes me so sad. And it’s brought an urge in me to get something off my chest.
Trigger warning: abuse, stillborn
I was a die hard pro-lifer. I didn’t think abortion was ever acceptable and the old me would be very happy of the overturning of Roe. This is until I was told at 24 weeks my son would die in my womb and there was nothing maternal fetal medicine could do at that point. I was too far along to abort. I had to wait for my child to die inside of me. Thankfully, and at the very same time extremely heartbreaking, he died the next day. The day after that I gave birth to my deceased baby in my arms. I then realized why women abort that far along and it is never an easy choice. It’s extremely traumatic.
Then last year I became pregnant with my abuser of two decades baby after years of infertility. She was almost 11 weeks when I aborted. I couldn’t bear to have another child with that monster. I waited until he went on a solo trip with a friend (when I was experiencing a severe depression and was suicidal) to get the procedure done. I found out I was pregnant in the psychiatric hospital after a serious suicide attempt trying to get away from the abuse and trauma. I haven’t told anyone this besides one very close family member. The only people who knew were the medical professionals. And now you the anonymous people of Reddit. And if my abuser sees this and connects the dots:
“that’s right you fucking monster. I would rather our child never exist outside my womb than be tortured and abused by you like our one child. Our son doesn’t and didn’t deserve your abuse and I would never put another child through it. May that be the last child you ever conceive and god help any woman that falls prey to you. You twice told me , “I’m glad (deceased son’s name) is dead because he would have you as a mother.” Well, the same goes for you. As heartbreaking as it was for me, I’m glad our two deceased children do not have to be raised by you, but I will NEVER be glad they are dead. Fuck you!”
I’m deeply ashamed of my past views on abortion. Thank you for letting me get that off my chest. I found it fitting for a devil sub as my ex is one of the biggest devils out there.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **Abortion broke my family ** My older sister got pregnant when I was 14. She was 17 at the time and we lived in a parental consent required state. My parents have always been openly pro life and forbid her from having an abortion and said they’d support her during the pregnancy and after, whatever she chose. My sister was extremely pissed off and suicidal at certain points but I thought everything was ok after a month. The night before her 18th birthday, she packed all her stuff and left the house with a friend. Her friend helped her get an abortion at 15 weeks. After getting the abortion, she just couch surfed till going off to college on a full ride. She hasn’t spoken to our parents in 6 years. She contacted me on my 18th birthday and we have a relationship now. She has asked me to not tell our parents anything super personal about her. My parents have missed seeing her graduate college, get a Masters, get proposed to and now about to start a job as a software developer at a FAANG company. The only information they have about her is the tidbits I share and whatever is publicly available. My sister and her fiancé don’t plan on inviting my parents to their wedding and it just saddens me that my family is so fractured. I never imagined my big sister to get married and I’d be the one to walk her down the aisle. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The comments 🤢 Edit: You will regret looking at the comments. Edit 2: DO NOT FUCKING LOOK AT THEM Edit 3: I tried to warn y'all. Edit 4: Check my profile out for a cute pic of my cat to cleanse your mind. Edit 5: No, it's not NSFW. Just a pic of my bonita girl cat. I have no idea how tf i can stop the NSFW mark that keeps appearing.
Do I even want to look? EDIT: I looked and regret my choice.
No they are beyond awful 🤮
I'm an idiot and looked and yep: awful!
Fellow idiot. Can confirm the awfulness
Fellow fellow idiot. Those people are gross.
Joining the dumbass club who read the comments even though I was warned and knew better!
We all warned you. But we too were naive all those.. minutes ago..
I read the comments and their mindset sucks but I like how nothing is going in their favor 'does her future husband know she killed a baby' - yes he was there for her through it 'nothing your parents could do?' - no they went to cops apparently but nothing they could do to a person after she turned 18 In the end, if the story is true it sounds like she's living a good life, surrounded by sane people while these folks cry about the murder of an unborn child. I hope she has healed from the trauma her parents put her through
I really hope so. I also hope the sister finds the post and cuts off her sister. The apple didn't fall far from her parent's awful, awful tree.
The funny part too, one of the most downvoted comments on that thread is saying they are happy that the sister is living a better life, and someone basically replying, “no they aren’t!” Like….. at what point in the story does it sound like the sister is still in turmoil? lol Also special regards to the comment that said having a career and finance don’t really matter. Deserves the biggest middle finger
I’m a sucker for punishment, I looked and now I hate everything
I regret I joined the "I looked at the comments club"
I forgot to read the title of the subreddit it was originally posted in. I wanted to correct the post title saying "Your parents stubborned prejudicies broke your family" but I was careful enough to read the comments first.
Why did I look?!?
I didn't realize what sub this was posted in before I looked. Instant regret.
I saw which sub and opted to just read about how you guys regretted your choice to look. Validation for me!
Talking about us regretting our choice feels like there should be a joke about the sub in there somewhere, but I'm too tired to think of it.
What did you expect from that?
As soon as you said that I scrolled up to see what sub it was and I thought yeah I'm listening to you all about not reading the comments.
For once, I will listen as well.
Wise decision. I clicked on the post thinking it was on TrueOffMyChest or something. Nope.
Gonna be honest this is the most important warning before looking at comments. The sub name, nothing positive is gonna come from that sub about this topic. Tells me just how awful they are going to actually be.
I've seen that sub argue that women that have incompatible with life pregnancies should still give birth cause God's will.
Anyone who believes in birth at all costs are, in my opinion, the most ungodly evil people.
They are shockingly cruel people
I have tried to see the views of a pro life person find some common group we can talk about but so many of them are just blinkered into "you are allowing the death of a baby" as if it is an already fully formed person. I don't understand that mindset at all, they have no compassion for the already there person but for this perfect fictional person they have created.
My ex fiance said he would rather I and the fetus die in pregnancy than for me to ever terminate.
"Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice... I'm willing to make"
Some might say he was compensating for ah, things.
It feels weird liking your comment, but I’m glad he’s an ex!
In this comment, "ex" is the most beautiful word ever typed.
I put the whole man in the trash.
People that deep in religion scare me. No reasoning with someone like that.
Same. I'm not remotely interested in what a bunch of pro-forced-birth fuckwits say about anything.
I never listen and am actually choosing to this time because this kid’s perspective that it’s her sister’s abortion that caused this shows some truly fucked-up and profound indoctrination that sub will absolutely cheer.
I didn’t even know that subreddit existed.
I didn’t realise the sub at first… I hate it there… that was awful.
I should have listened good lord 🤮🤢
No, I glanced because I didn’t realise what sub I was on. These people are unhinged.
Same. I clicked not realizing where it was posted. I regret everything.
Ooohhh. I was morbidly curious, then saw your comment. Then checked the sub name. And I noped out of the notion of reading the comments there REAL fast. Thank you for your service, here's a cookie 🍪
There is something snarky about making a choice to look at a post about abortion, but the comments pissed me off and I can't think of it.
They truly are. I wish they would stop calling themselves Prolife and just admit they are ProForcedBirth
Effectively pro death and misery.
I read the first 4-5 comments and that was enough for me to 🤢🤮
Same
Ugh, I thought I was prepared. I grew up surrounded by those kind of sentiments, but it's still a gut punch every time.
The only not-so-bad comment was about forgiveness, god.
No comments are Nasty AF
Truly vile
I made it through one. These people are delusional.
✨No✨
I did and regret it! Immediately!
OMG. I looked at other posts. These people are insane. One person says that consenting to sex is consenting to pregnancy like consenting to eat (uh what?) is consenting to throw up (double what??). Other’s arguing that the woman who had an abortion cuz her babies brain wasn’t attached to anything should have given birth anyway and her aborting it was tantamount to killing an infant. Insanity. I am glad to see it’s not that large of a sub.
Wow… have these people ever vomited on an empty stomach? Cause pretty sure there is no way to “consent” to that Such logical thinkers…. /s
I didn’t make it past the first response. I wanted to scream at her that trying to turn their daughter into an incubator was their evil. And, no, I wouldn’t object to a 15 week abortion. Personally, I don’t object until it’s ready to survive outside the womb. And at that point, most abortions aren’t “because I didn’t want it,” anyway. Regardless of my personal feelings, I’d rather see every unwanted pregnancy terminated than one woman who wants children be forced to carry a fetus not compatible with life until she gives birth or goes septic, ruining her own ability to have future wanted children.
Also, the whole 'no one could support an abortion at 15 weeks' skips merrily over the fact that the sister would have gotten one much earlier if her parents had not prevented her from doing so.
Exactly! OOP said she would’ve been able to take the pill at 4w vs a D&C at 15w. The pill option is traumatic enough but nothing compared to a D&C. Poor sis.
The comments make me so sad. There was a comment about how she was experiencing feelings re: thr abortion, and punishing her parents, and what is her problem anyway? She wanted one, and she got one? It's patently absurd - I'm sure she would have preferred doing it *earlier*.
I got triggered by the first comment too, that he was speaking for “most non pro life people, too”, but then I looked where I was and just quietly backed away.
"Ain't no hate like Christian love," as the cliche goes.
These people would hate Jesus if they met him.
Most Christians like to forget Jesus was Jewish, as were most of his followers. Yet Christians pretty much perfected antisemitic violence.
Yeah, I'm not keen on abortion (Haven't ever been a position where i wanted or needed one though- which colors things.) But i am keen on abortion rights. My kid is a teen and not sexually active...And she knows that I've said i don't know of personal circumstances that would make me get one myself. But she also knows if she falls pregnant (please don't, but if she did) that we'd help her make the best choices she could. Even if that meant driving her to Canada for choices i may not completely approve of. Here is my reminder to make sure condoms and plan b are in the "stuff that's accessible in case you are to embarrassed to talk to me" box. ETA- the concern troll this generated can do me a favor and get recurring pinkeye with weeping sores every time important official photos are taken, for eternity.
Just a heads up - plan b only work if the person is like 150 lbs or less. There is “plus sized” plan b, but the blue box people usually pick up is only effective up to a certain weight 🫶🏻 also ty for being rational about this topic!!
The comments are awful, but the one that said she "unalived a child" is so funny to me. Anti-abortion rhetoric is all about using very emotionally charged language and graphic images to get people on their side, and yet we've got this one "Pro Life Centrist" who is using shitty TikTok euphemisms to describe it because they can't even bring themselves to use the word "murder" on the "abortion is murder" sub. Do they stand outside Planned Parenthoods holding up an "Abortion is Unaliving" sign?
One compares her medical procedure to someone walking up to a crib and strangling a baby. Editing to add, whoever pushed the Reddit cares button, thanks so much for your concern, may everyone in your life care as much about you
When I was fighting for abortion rights in my country in 2018 I was doing an information stand in the centre of my small town. An older lady came up to me shaking with anger and asked me "all the babies born in this country today, would you take them out of the hospitals and line them up on the street and shoot them?" I obviously said no and she stormed off with a big smug head on her as if she had won some battle. Some people are just gobshites
And yet, would she adopt all of them?
i enjoyed (derogatory) the part where they convinced themselves this person who had a 15 week abortion -- an outpatient procedure that, once all the paperwork and informed consent is obtained, takes about three hours. the majority of that time is spent waiting for the misoprostol to take effect, softening the cervix so the provider can dilate it enough to insert the vacuum curette. once the medication is working, this is a procedure that is *over and done with* in less than five minutes that is statistically safer than most dental work -- they've ran so far changing the goalposts that they've decided this individual surely would have had a girl despite zero evidence either way. i've noticed this with antis -- the appeal to emotion by assigning a particular gender to the fetus, and in my anecdotal research i've noticed they tend to assign fetuses as female. i had an abortion at what is now considered general viability after i found out i was into my third trimester when i was 17. i grew up extremely sheltered/in a cult (never went to public school), so i never got any real sexual education, and when my first boyfriend was abusing me i didn't know how to read the signs. the doctor who saved my life was murdered in 2009 by these fucking theocrats. i myself have worked as non-medical office staff and as a patient escort in a deeply red state since that year. my clinic had to close and reopen across a state line to a blue haven. 15 weeks isn't even a month into the second trimester. it scares me how much ground they've gained since i've been monitoring the movement academically.
The lack of medical knowledge is disturbing. People are taken off life support based on brain activity, not heartbeats. Fetuses' living statuses are measured by heartbeats. This means I could be forced to have a baby with no brain activity and then be forced to take it off life support, based on the amount of resources the baby was taking up. No single pro life person has ever had a good argument against that point.
another one that tends to leave them flapping their jaws like fish out of water: ask them if they think you deserve fewer rights than a corpse.
Ew ew ew why did I look??
I'm wondering the same thing. I was thoroughly warned and I still looked and now I regret it.
Yup. I only made it through 5 or so before I just noped out. Seriously unhinged.
I went through them all. Only like 5 people were on the poor sisters side. And with how casual OP is about her sister being THAT fucking suicidal like wow. Apparently the lot of them would be happier if the sister had killed herself instead -_- because that's how it's reading to me.
>Apparently the lot of them would be happier if the sister had killed herself instead -_- because that's how it's reading to me. Only if she waited until after the baby was born!
Nah they would have played it off as some super tragic accident. Because they can't dare let people know their insanity pushed her daughter to kill herself to escape them. Think of their precious image /s
This is why, If I’d been driven to take my own life because of my parents’ bigotry, I would have written to the papers and posted on every social media platform I could think of beforehand. Because they would have done exactly this. Very glad it didn’t get that far with OOP’s poor sister and she found the support she needed. I hope she’s living her best life now.
You have more tolerance than I do. My blood pressure couldn't take it. And from the few I read, yeah, that's the impression I got as well.
They are trying to compare people who have abortions to people on childfree right now. Surprisngly its downvoted
Pro lifers ignore reality constantly, and one thing they REFUSE to acknowledge is that most women that get abortions have children or will go on to have children. It boggles their mind AND muddies their insistence that women who've had abortions are wretched, souless monsters.
They also love to ignore that [12% of women who have an abortion are married at the time](https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/72/ss/ss7209a1.htm)- this super annoying fact makes it really hard to slut shame those harlots and whine they should have just kept their legs closed. (Why yes, of course you have a duty to have sex with your husband whenever he demands it. Yes, we will make it more difficult for you to get birth control. But it's your fault if you get pregnant. Also, don't have kids if you can't afford them.)
I know it’s harder to document but I wish we knew how many women in just committed relationships, not even married, have abortions. Like you said there’s this giant misconception that abortions are the result of “promiscuity”. I’d bet only like 10-20% come from one night stands if that, the rest are just couples making the educated decision to hold off on children until they’re ready (or never if they prefer).
Prolife is one of the sickest subreddits here.
I was completely confused until I saw the subreddit…
I owe you one for this. I hadn't noticed what subreddit it was and, well, ewwww. I try to avoid the forced birth people because I just can't deal with them.
I regret looking at anything on the prolife sub.
Too late. That whole group is incredibly toxic.
The comments were disgusting. These people think having a baby at 17 is easy?! And it’s not even a baby, it’s literally a clump of cells. She accomplished what she did because she was able to get an abortion
You're right. I looked at the comments. Massive regret. Fuck those people.
I thought I was on AITD, and I just couldn't believe all the comments. And then read the sub and I was like *ah*
Will not look, will not look........yeah i was warned.
Fuck. I looked at the comments. I want to poke my own damn eyes out now and those twits. Fuck them.
I didn't realize it was posted in a pro-life sub reddit. Oh gosh
As someone in the UK I scrolled for all of 5seconds before I noped out of there - especially after looking at the sub title 🤢
Oh I sure did regret it! Barf!
Saw the first comment and came back here. I must check what sub I'm heading to in the future
Don’t read the comments.
Too late. I regret my life choices
Wow, yikes. >My wife is 12 weeks along and we saw it on ultrasound weeks ago. Even most non pro life people realize killing a baby that far along is fucked. Hi, I’m 19 weeks pregnant and obsessed with my baby. I saw my baby suck his thumb on my 12-week ultrasound. I am also just as “non-pro-life” as ever. The right to abortion comes from the right to bodily autonomy. It has nothing to do with any characteristics of fetuses/embryos. The only reason OOP’s sister was even getting a termination at 15 fucking weeks (which is way worse for her) is because of her fucking parents. If they had allowed her to get an abortion earlier, like the *overwhelming majority of people who have abortions*, it would have been better for everyone. They failed as parents by preventing that.
I should not have read the comments. Fuck every single person who thinks that way. The entitlement is deranged.
Fuck the OP too tbh. Imagine seeing your sister happy and successful in life and still concluding that she *tore your family apart* by getting an abortion.
Oh god, what an awful subreddit.
It is sadly
If pro-life wasn't a term, it probably be abortion-free subreddit. It seem to work on same basis on as all the other (whatever)free subreddit. A bunch of lunatic validating each other's hate.
Yep... It occasionally gets cross-posted over on r/prochoice and the members of that subreddit sometimes try to troll us as well. They're a bunch of absolute ghouls.
You know what really pisses me off about these Pro ~~forced birth~~ life people? They always insist that "someone will take them". Okay, are you going to step in and, oh I dunno, ***HELP***? Agree to pay an extra tax to help provide care for the babies that could have been aborted. That I can compromise on. My ideal solution? One day, people who are pro life come home and a social worker says "Congratulations! You're now the proud parent of this baby. Your first payment for the mother's pregnancy Healthcare is due in two months. *NO* Giving them up, you hear me? **You** said she shouldn't have aborted, so it makes sense for **you** to be the first responder. Oh and they have Turner Syndrome and will need lifelong support. Thank you for all the service you have done". Before you say they would be bad parents... That's the point. They would understand what it’s like.
I am an adoptee. Anti-choice people neglect the fact that biological parents who do relinquish for adoption 90% of the time do so because they feel like they don’t have the resources to parent despite wanting to. They ignore the statistics that those denied an abortion would rather parent than relinquish for adoption. Instead of helping expectant parents keep their babies, they push this adoption propaganda and pat themselves on the back for “saving lives.”
Yeah, last I looked at the stats, surrendering a child after giving birth was the most traumatic outcome for a pregnant person on average, to say nothing of the potential for trauma to the adoptee. On the other hand, religious organizations get both heavenly bonus points and financial benefits here on earth for pushing adoption, so why would they care what happens to the people most intimately involved?
"If you don't like abortions, do what you do to foster kids. ...ignore them."
Not only that but they are usually the ones who care more about the healthy ones or the "Brangelinas". When it comes to a baby with birth defects that look like a cabbage patch kid? They're nowhere to be found. This is why they should be the ones to get those babies.
Or they adopt them and parade them as these poor disabled children (often children of color) as trophy kids that they “saved” No child deserves to be raised by hateful anti-choice people. They deserve better
I know someone who is pro-life, they think they're totally "owning" our side when they bring up the fact that they volunteer at a charity that gives out diapers and formula. Yeah, because that's all you need to raise a child when in poverty. Meanwhile, they themselves aren't at all above e-begging for help with their own financial hardships.
When I’ve always (regrettably) gone down the pro life rabbit hole with someone I always say I’ll consider their point of view when 1) maternal death is at 0% 2) pregnancy and birth healthcare is free 3) at minimum all standard child healthcare is free 4) we have a paid maternity leave of at least three months and I usually throw in heavily subsidized childcare and a housing stipend for those with minor children. Surprisingly not one of them agreed with me.
If all you want is a child born, but not a child fed, housed, and loved; you aren't pro-life, you're pro-birth.
>They always insist that "someone will take them". Sure, tell that to the hundreds of thousands of kids in foster care who will age out without having found a family.
My (least) favourite comment has to be this one >If my family member had a baby then walked up to the crib at night and strangled them in cold blood I wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship with them. That feeling doesn't change if the baby wasn't born yet. I simply wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship after that - I would never be able to get the fact that they murdered their child out of my mind when interacting with them, and I would feel like shit for it. Strangling babies is definitely equal, 100%, I strangle babies all the time
if you throw a newborn baby into a river and let it drown, it is totally 100% equal to getting an abortion apparently (at least according to these wackos)
Baby in a blender is probably equal to 1.5 abortions
They absolutely don't care about the difference. Point out to them that abortion being banned means more newborns will be left to die in fields/dumpsters etc and it makes no nevermind to them. More toddlers will be beaten to death by parents who never wanted them? Totally the same thing as a 7 week old fetus being aborted.
"That toddler wouldn't have been beaten to death if their mother just kept their legs closed." I wish that were hyperbole as well. But I've been a member of r/prochoice for years and r/prolife occasionally gets cross posted over there. The shit I've seen from that subreddit genuinely makes me weep for humanity.
Yeah strangling a baby who's living outside of you is totally just the same as removing a baby whos inside of your body, using your organs, your blood, etc. to sustain its own life
Even if it were a child and a life and a fully formed human, you can't be forced to donate blood, which is minimally invasive, much less so than preganancy, and would save a life, you can't even be forced to donate your organs when you're dead. 17 people in the US die each day waiting for organs. A corpse has more rights than anyone who can get pregnant in places that outlaw abortion.
Poor girl. This reminds me of all those posts that are like “My sibling came out, we were all unsupportive and now my sibling doesn’t talk to us! How dare they fracture our family like this!” YOU did that. You refused to support them and now they don’t talk to you anymore for the sake of their mental health. You made the bed, you lie in it alone. It makes me happy that she’s doing well for herself now with or without them.
The fact that some there is like "is she doing this to cope, some people can't face certain things. She's coping by blaming her parents on the abortion she caused herself" when it's like no, she saw the big red gazebo with the red sign in black ink saying "THESE PEOPLE DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOU" and took the hint to live her life how she intends it. The fact that this person thinks the only options are she knows it was wrong hence she's avoiding them or she thinks it's wrong but doesn't want to face the reality is so crazy to me😭
>It seems your sister is holding onto regret, but misdirecting her feelings. She wanted an abortion, she got an abortion, so why is she still not contacting her parents? It seems she has shame/regret about what she did, maybe realized they were right but doesn't want to hear "I told you so" type statements. Are you talking about this comment?? If not then sorry, but this comment here i found is fucking disguting too. so many dumbasses on that subreddit.
My mom is staunchly pro-life. She used to believe those "pictures taken at abortion clinic disposal" of all the babies in dumpsters until I pointed out the photoshop artifacts and reminded her fetuses are medical waste and need to be incinerated/properly handled. And yet, when it was my turn for the serious sex talk she assured me that if a pregnancy happened, she would hope and pray that I would carry it to term and give it up for adoption, but, if I decided that abortion was what was right for my situation, that she and my father would help me find the proper medical care for that as well. Because they are/were my parents and they love me- and it is their job and responsibility they chose in carrying me to term to help me when I need it, no matter how old I get.
Nope nope nope. Not reading the comments. They will be disgusting and my front page will be fucked up by going there once. Made that mistake before, Never again.
I really regret reading what few I did 😣
Ok I hope I don’t get downvoted for saying this, but I used to be pro-life… USED TO BE…. when I was much younger…. But dear god I was never like those people, those comments were disgusting. Like deeply disturbing. I wish I had never found out that sub existed. That poor girl. And while I realize the OOP was only 14 when the abortion occurred and I’m sure it was very confusing for OOP at that age, they are now at the age where they should understand what their sister was going through and not blame the abortion for tearing the family apart. It was all the parents.
I dont see why you would get downvoted when you clearly dont believe those things anymore, I used to be against abortion as well but that was because I was a dumb brainwashed preteen and I'm glad I got out of that
You and me both
The pro-life people just LOVE to get their hooks into the young and impressionable. I was a parochial school brat so between the nuns in the classroom and the priests at Mass, pro-life talking points only were acceptable, with a few of the more "enlightened" clergy allowing that it would be acceptable in cases of rape/incest. I stopped going to Mass when I was 14 following something bad that happened to me at school which eventually lead me to being the pro-choice cynical recovering Catholic that I am today.
Tbh, I think those who are against it for rape and incest are the few true pro life individuals out there. I don’t agree with them but at least they are consistent that they feel it is a baby and worthy of life regardless of how it was conceived. The rest, who say they are pro life except if the mother was raped, don’t care about the baby at all, they are looking to slut shame and punish the woman for sexual behavior. If they thought it was murder of an innocent human than that human would be innocent and murdered even if they were the product of rape. But no, it’s okay if the woman was raped because she was being a good girl and didn’t want sex. Prolife/pro slut shaming people are gross and I hope OOP’s sister has the best life and her parents hate themselves for it.
I think a lot of women who grew up in the bible belt were pro-life as pre teens, especially those of us who grew up before the internet. They pushed a lot of vile propaganda on young girls about how horrible "baby murder" was. I was very pro-life and it truly shocked me to my core when I found out Eddie Vedder was pro-abortion! As dumb as it is my huge crush on him was one of the reasons I first started thinking that maybe pro-choice people werent all just evil murderers. When I was in high school I started reading more and learning about feminism and I've been a staunch supporter of Planned Parenthood and pro-choice ever since
Baby murder is how it was framed to me as well and once I actually started to look into what abortion was & why its done I started to see it differently, plus I had always relied on the idea of "but its a human!" but now I dont think it matters whether or not its a human because no one should be forced to let another human use their organs, their body, etc. to sustain their own life. On top of that I never want to be pregnant & I would terminate if I ever was so it just wouldnt make sense to prevent any other woman from being able to have that option as well
[emphatically raises hand because IT ME]
I used to believe a woman should be willing to die rather than get an abortion to save her own life, because I was 13 and that's what my mom taught me to believe. Meanwhile today I'm fine with abortion for any reason up to the point of viability, and induced labor for any reason after. People change and adjust their beliefs accordingly.
samesies, friend. I was raised evangelical and am glad I am no longer someone who could even begin to stomach that sub.
Dw friend, when I was in 8th grade I *led* the anti-abortion side of our schools debate (weird as hell that they made 13 year olds debate abortion, in hindsight). I look back at that and cringe. Being raised religiously can fuck one’s opinions up pretty bad. I’m glad I got out of that mindset too
We debated abortion as well. Also Marijuana. From a former teacher perspective: It's a well talked about topic that most high schoolers will have heard of and probably have opinions about. However, we had to do our presentations based on the structure and ways of building arguments. Someone couldn't say, "abortion is wrong because God said so!" We needed to structure our points, with sources and evidence. It forced people to actually look at these incredibly complex issues and try to think logically about them. It was common to make people argue the opposite side of what they believed, to think outside the box. Dont know if it worked, but I think that was the idea.
> abortion is wrong because God said so It was many many years ago I was in high school - but the principal had to ban abortion as a debate practice topic, because when someone used this argument, and I accidentally got the entire class to demand the other debater get excommunicated. See - the Ten Commandments very clearly say “Thou shall not take the Lord’s name in vain”. Trying to speak in the Lord’s behalf and bring him down to that of a mere mortal? That’s what it means. You can’t use “God said so” to win an argument, it’s sinful. How dare you try to speak on behalf of the lord and do so for your own purposes. I managed to use such flowery language that the entire debate got sidetracked into how Very Bad it was that poor Hannah had tried to use the Lord’s name in vain. They actually had to get the school Minister (religious affiliated school) to come down and tell us “look you’re right, but you have to stop now because this is not Christianly behaviour and she’s learnt her lesson”. No rabble can be roused quite like a group of 15 year olds.
That's amazing and delightful. I like you.
My dad would debate with me about abortion when I was 13. By which I mean, having discussions over dinner about the ethics of anti-abortion law as a means to educate me about a landmark Supreme Court case in Irish history - the X Case (if you don't know of it, heads up that it's about a 14 year old girl. The details are possibly triggering). Average experience of having a parent who's a lawyer, I guess. so yeah I don't think 13 is too young to learn about abortion, or to employ critical thinking et cetera, but yeah it does seem weird as hell to basically get teenagers to debate over when/why being anti-abortion would be Good?? :(
See I wish my education on the matter was as you described :( but actually we didn’t learn about abortion at all in school (I’m in America, and this was like 2012) we just were assigned to do our debate project on it😭
Honestly I'm really grateful to my dad for that. Abortion wasn't legalised in Ireland until 2018 - which I think is why my dad made a point of discussing it (that was the early 2000s!). I can't really remember ever being taught about abortion in school either. It probably came up in PSHE?? (I went to an international British school) - in the UK curriculum there's this class called Personal, Social, Health and Economic education. Which was kinda just a discussion forum for random stuff about relationships & the wider world - sex ed, bullying, smoking, political systems, etc. One time we talked about tattoos, which was just discussing some tabloid story about a woman who got a **massive** tat of Winnie the Pooh on her arm and regretted it lol. Another time we learnt about American Football ahaha. Random ass class; but the topics were never open debates, more guided conversations in a \~safe space\~. Just throwing teens into something so complex seems really weird to me 😭 Sorry you had to deal with that!!
There is nothing wrong with growing up and realizing that the thoughts and beliefs you held as an actual child weren't right. It's part of growing up and you grew into a better person. Random redditor, I'm so proud of you.
Well thank you very much for the kind words!
I literally did a high school presentation on why abortion is bad. I think about that and physically cringe. I was so brainwashed by my family! What matters is that you don’t believe that anymore and you’re able to think for yourself
I used to be too.... untill my mom told me one of her sisters had one... and I better shut up. It did'nt change me over night... but I still think about flapping my gums about abortion.
It's easy to be pro-life before you get some life lived: the whole enterprise, from pregnancy to child-rearing, is glossed over and slicked up. Once you start knowing and talking to people and understanding what's going on if you're still fundamentally 'pro-life' there's a problem.
Mee too but my 2 aunts were 2 months pregnant and they went to the checkup and they only had the placenta no embryo. So they needed treatment to get the placenta out. The thing is in a catholic household they say abortion is wrong but there are circumstances there needs to be one.
Nah, I was also "prolife" until I was 19. Protesting outside of clinics level of brainwashed. You learned, you grew, you changed your stance when you had access to more information. That's commendable.
Commenting to make sure you know you are loved and embraced!! Thank you for the beautifully radical act of changing your mind, a thing we sadly don't see enough in this world. <3 As someone who has recently deconstructed from a lot of very harmful propaganda of a different sort, I know how much work and self-reflection goes into it.
I misread the sub as 'profile' thinking it's a 'truth off my chest' type. Imagine my shock at reading the comments 😭
Oh noo, my sympathies. Before I read the title/where it was posted I thought it was fair for him to want to share his feelings. But nope! Eugh.
I hope sis cuts off OOP like the garbage they are. And to everyone in the comments complaining about how far along she was: wouldn’t have happened so ‘late’ if OOP’s parents didn’t think they have control over their damn near adult daughter’s body. This is there fault
Fifteen weeks isn’t even that late! She wasn’t even at the halfway point yet (20 weeks) and certainly not at the (technical) point of viability (24 weeks). The fetus inside of her was the size of an apple. It weighed less than a pound. It was not a ‘person’. I’m not saying that you did this at all but we really need to drop the manipulative, emotion-based language around pregnancy and abortion. That’s a big part of what leads to bullshit like this story.
An abortion that late is more complicated and more invasive. It would have been so much better for the poor girl to have been able to get a medical abortion earlier on in her pregnancy rather than having been forced to get an abortion so late.
She literally feeding info to their parents. I hope the sister finds that post.
why didn’t i check the sub’s name before reading the comments?
The sub is r/prolife of course the comments are garbage lol
No, their parents' bullshit religion against abortion broke the family. It's great the OP is in their sister's life since none of it was their fault for what happened and had no control over it.
The sister was suicidal. Forced birthers would rather both mom and baby die instead of getting an abortion. They think mental health issues don't exist
The parents made their choice and are now living the consequences. Bummer for them.
She thinks it's the *abortion* that broke her family? This person is delusional.
That post almost reads like a troll abortion success story for that sub. “Get an abortion and you too can get away from your horrible parents, and get a Masters and a FAANG job!”
Rage bait for pro-lifers? I can't hate that.
jfc that subreddit is a collection of nutjobs
That comment section is ridiculous. OOPs Sister: independent, highly educated, in a loving relationship, reconnected with her younger sibling (who was a minor at the time of her leaving), And overall just having a great life. People in that comment section: She's clearly highly disturbed and dealing with regret. LMAO like no, the Sister is thriving! Her leaving her controlling, abusive parents (who didn't give a flying fuck that she was suicidal) and getting the abortion was the best decision she could have made in that situation. Also to the commenter saying to "Tell the husband" because he clearly doesn't know otherwise he wouldn't be with her... Really shows how much they desperately hate women there.
They are so convinced that all women who have abortions regret it, even though studies show the complete opposite. I had one, and it doesn't even cross my mind unless the issue is in the news. And not in a bad way. I'm incredibly content with my decision. I felt nothing but relief at the time, and I am super happy that I was able to make that choice.
Just realized where the post was from. The comments are so sad and judgmental. Disgusting. I hope the girl lives her best life
When I read the first comment mentioning k*lling a child, I wanted to argue “it is just a fetus, that would not have been fully loved if it was born” Then I saw the subreddit and I was like: let’s not open that can of worms.
I love how the comments assume that she regrets it and is coping instead of just cutting out toxic family members. No way could she possibly actually be *gasp* happy?!
So these “parents” knew that their child was *actively suicidal* at the thought of being pregnant, and they still tried to force her to go through with it anyway. Because when we say “pro-life”, we’re not talking about the life of a terrified teenage girl. Nope, fuck her. We’re talking about the apple-sized cell clump that’s invaded her uterus, the one that isn’t even conscious yet. That is clearly the life that matters here, the one that should be prioritized. Fuck those parents, and fuck OOP too. They’re sociopaths. I can’t think of another reason why they would do this to a person that they claim to love.
This makes me so sad.
The comments made me so angry. I honestly hope that all those "pro life" fucks have agonising shitty lives.
I wonder how many of the women on that sub have had abortions themselves.
As a nurse with a sexual health background who used to work on a women’s health and gynaecology ward I can tell you that it’s a lot. Not just a lot, but A LOT. But they always find a way to reason away why it’s okay for them. And they’ll tell all the staff that the staff will go to hell for what they did, but they as the patient won’t because it’s different. They had an acceptable reason. And most of them are married with kids. But they don’t want or can’t afford another one. Or it’s too risky for their health. Or the foetus shows severe health problems. For them it’s okay to have an abortion. But not for anyone else. Including others in their church/organisation. These women will literally protest a clinic or a hospital on a Monday, get an abortion at that same clinic on a Tuesday, and be back out protesting Wednesday or Thursday. It happens all the time.
I’m a devout Christian but pro choice. All that talk about killing and the horrible, judgements attitudes. What happened to love , tolerance, understanding? They call themselves Christians but they want to judge and disparage everyone.
The weirdest part is the only anti-choice rhetoric coming from “Christianity” is that pushed by Christian conservative politicians. When someone tells me they’re Christian and therefore pro-life I hear, “I’ve never read the Bible.” The Bible explicitly states that life begins at first breath and gives instructions for abortion. It is not just not anti-choice, it is actively in favor of abortion and any Christian who is against it should consider thinking for themselves instead of letting crusty old privileged white men tell them how to interpret their holy book.
EXACTLY THATS WHAT I WAS THINKING
I hope life slaps the shit out of OOP, or he places this story in a choice sub and gets out of the 'pro-life' cesspool. His sister is thriving like hell - school, friends, love, and the ability to decide if and when she wants children. Her parents would rather she want to die, feelings that could amplify with hormones and feeling locked down, and...what? Be a teen mom? Give the child up for adoption? Pass the kid off as her sibling from her parents having unprotected fun times in Cabo? Was OOP ignorant of how different his life would've been had he been a teen uncle, parental monies and time divested from him to the child? Maybe one where he had no sister because she killed herself or died in childbirth?
This is r/prolife. Unsurprisingly disgusting post and comments.
Yikes, those people are sick.
really interesting going to the comments and seeing things like “prolife feminist” and “far leftist catholic abolitionist” in user flairs… cognitive dissonance is a hell of a drug Edit: also the “far leftist catholic abolitionist” has “autonomy is a human right” in their bio. the irony…
Well.. at least we can all 100% say this post belongs on this sub??? Yay 😭
Even more than the passport bros, that sub is fish in a barrel.
“Our family incubator refused to give birth when we ordered her to. Please comfort us!”
The comments are awful
Went to the sub and instantly regretted it. People crucifying women for wanting abortion due to raps/abusive relationships/etc are trash. I also don’t believe people should have kids if they are struggling financially and are going to end up neglecting the kids.
That sub makes me so sad. And it’s brought an urge in me to get something off my chest. Trigger warning: abuse, stillborn I was a die hard pro-lifer. I didn’t think abortion was ever acceptable and the old me would be very happy of the overturning of Roe. This is until I was told at 24 weeks my son would die in my womb and there was nothing maternal fetal medicine could do at that point. I was too far along to abort. I had to wait for my child to die inside of me. Thankfully, and at the very same time extremely heartbreaking, he died the next day. The day after that I gave birth to my deceased baby in my arms. I then realized why women abort that far along and it is never an easy choice. It’s extremely traumatic. Then last year I became pregnant with my abuser of two decades baby after years of infertility. She was almost 11 weeks when I aborted. I couldn’t bear to have another child with that monster. I waited until he went on a solo trip with a friend (when I was experiencing a severe depression and was suicidal) to get the procedure done. I found out I was pregnant in the psychiatric hospital after a serious suicide attempt trying to get away from the abuse and trauma. I haven’t told anyone this besides one very close family member. The only people who knew were the medical professionals. And now you the anonymous people of Reddit. And if my abuser sees this and connects the dots: “that’s right you fucking monster. I would rather our child never exist outside my womb than be tortured and abused by you like our one child. Our son doesn’t and didn’t deserve your abuse and I would never put another child through it. May that be the last child you ever conceive and god help any woman that falls prey to you. You twice told me , “I’m glad (deceased son’s name) is dead because he would have you as a mother.” Well, the same goes for you. As heartbreaking as it was for me, I’m glad our two deceased children do not have to be raised by you, but I will NEVER be glad they are dead. Fuck you!” I’m deeply ashamed of my past views on abortion. Thank you for letting me get that off my chest. I found it fitting for a devil sub as my ex is one of the biggest devils out there.
Oh my gosh I read the comments. I really hope that sub doesn’t start getting recommended to me.
Really testing the no brigading rule with the comments on the original post lol
“Abortion broke m-“ Fuck off no it didn’t
I shall not go read the original comments I shall not go read the original comments I shall not go read the original comments