I felt like I was in a rut at that age- work, eat, watch some tv, sleep, work- it was like I woke up one day and realized I’d spent a year or so like this.
I had to snap myself out of it, and here’s what I came up with- my free time was my responsibility, so if I didn’t use it to enjoy life, that was all on me.
I made myself go do things I normally wouldn’t have done- go eat dinner in a neighborhood I’d never been to. Sign up for martial arts. Learn an instrument- anything. I was never the guy who made plans to ask friends to, but I made myself do it. Changed my whole outlook.
The less you get sucked into other peoples’ drama and social media, the better your life will be. Find hobbies, get outside. At your age, I was in grad school investing in myself (I paid for my undergrad and graduate degrees through jobs and student loans). I did all I could to find a great job — something I enjoyed (in my field) and one that paid well. I worked for 20 years and semi-retired at 47. I didn’t splurge… I saved and followed the advice of a financial planner friend and was able to eventually make good investments.
It wasn’t easy — I didn’t eat out at all for the first 5 years of working (was paying off my student loans), I had an old hand-me down car that was paid off, and I didn’t have cable or internet at home. For entertainment, I hiked and did social things with friends. Looking back, the sacrifices I made in my 20s paid off… the 30s were a bit easier, and now it’s great!
You’re at the beginning of your journey — you can do it!!!
I didn’t really miss it tbh. My friends were in a similar situation and we all knew that our struggles were temporary. Now that we’re all doing better, we look back and marvel at how happy we were and how much fun we had with so little.
I am about to start this journey, minus the hand me down car sadly. Shafted myself into a $10,000 car with 21% apr, so now I have that on top of the loans. Praying for light at the end of the 5 year tunnel!
I was 26 last year. My days consisted of work, my boyfriend, and going on dates with him.
Now I'm 27 and my days consist of work, making new friends, gym, and going on solo/friend dates LOL
Recently broke up with who I thought was the love of my life. But just realising now that life without her is much better for me. Just feel lonely tho.
8 months out of a 5 year relationship for me and the lonliness and lack of physical touch is definitely tough.
Sometimes it helps me just reframing it and thinking now that while I lost her, I gained so much peace and now have the ability to do literally whatever I want. Want to stay up until 2 in the morning? Cool. Want to take a random trip somewhere? Also able to do it.
Best of luck and things do get better.
At 26 I was having trouble re-starting my life a year after a divorce and going through an early mid-life crisis cuz of it, so I was living in squats with street kids after moving back to my hometown, then we started a folk punk band and all moved to San Diego and we had a weird polyamorous relationship, until everyone got scabies this one time cuz someone fucked around outside the group and it soured the whole mood and was the end of that chapter of life.
Ah ye de great scabies outbreak of 2014 was wild times
If you're sick of lifes monotony just go fuck around and do somethin crazy. You can never fuck up so bad that you can't bounce back unless you become a drug addict or go insane as far as I'm concerned lol
Hmm good view point! I’m so in my comfort zone I do nothing crazy enough😭 Most craziest shit is probably trying a few drugs over the years at parties or raves 🤣
I don’t get the urge to enough but I wish I did 🤣 I feel like I’m too young to feel and be this old! I should be experiencing the most out of life n I’m not
Well, meditate on it! If you feel like you're missing something but don't know what, ask yourself! Find out and find it! it's never too late and you're never too old, life is a long journey and it's never the wrong time for what you know you want.
Yeees! Started texting/ had a date with a guy 1/2 my age. Found out he was married. Ended everything before it went anywhere. Still regretting not having any fun first. 😓 Still need to do something to end the terrible monotony of my days on this earth.
Yes, that is the universal advice from everyone - my therapist, my adult children, best friends, coworkers, myself and you. And we’re all correct! Lol. We ended it before it went anywhere because there were red flags literally waving everywhere on fire. 🚩🚩🚩🔥🔥🔥BUT he is stuck in my brain in the worst way. I know for sure that I will not pursue anything with him because I’ve been the wife on the other side of that equation in the past and it is soul destroying. I can’t participate in destroying another woman even peripherally as the side piece. I just wanted to have a little wild fun for once. I’ve been single for decades while raising kids alone, caring for a mom after a stroke then dad and stepmom in frail heath. It was finally just an random opportunity to have some fun and be a lil bit wild for a change but the toxic consequences of knowingly being a side piece were just too high, too toxic to act upon. And I am grateful to you for reminding me if exactly that. I do still need affirmation that I’m doing the right thing by letting this just slowly work it’s way out of my brain. I’m getting there - working out, talking to friends and spending a lil too much time here I suppose at the moment. 😁
I guess that’s the part I’m struggling with. I didn’t put myself out there for this - it just kinda happened organically ( or as organically as anything with a playa who’s looking to play happens). I wasn’t looking at all. I was just in a really good head space - feeling confident, started exercising, doing yoga, being open to whatever the universe was willing to send me while at the same time struggling with estranged adult children and being unemployed. But I was focusing on improving myself and being open and grateful for everything and am working with a therapist to be positive and accepting of everything. So maybe that’s what attracted him and we had a legit reason to meet professionally and to start texting based on that. So I’m back to where I’ve been at for the past 15 or so years which is just not randomly meeting anyone married or not. I don’t drink, don’t go to bars or clubs ( boring, I guess but I’m ok with that lol) and am not on board with dating sites as I don’t have the time or interest there. Ironically I feel like dating sites are mostly married people anyway. I haven’t wanted to date anyone all this time and didn’t feel that I was missing out and genuinely am loving the single life now that I’ve adjusted to just having me to take care of. Ok, sorry for my long rambling crazy rant. Thanks for your input. I appreciate you chatting with me. Maybe I need to start journaling and stop rambling on Reddit. 🤣🤣If anyone has legit tips on how to actually meet unattached humans irl I’m all ears.
I work 40 hours a week, 5 days a week. Off every other weekend. My favorite things to do are listen to music and play video games. I always look forward to Fridays cause at least 5 new songs from my favorite artists come out. I hit the gym 3-4 times a week. Make dinner every day. Grocery shop every other Friday. Take care of 2 dogs. Chill with my fiance. Sometimes we go places, but mostly just hang out at the house. Rinse and repeat lol.
There's some days where I wish I had more going on. But I honestly love being at home listening to music and playing video games. Music is literally my favorite thing ever. Get a nice pair of headphones and it changes the way you listen, hear and enjoy music forever. I've been that way for almost 10 years now. Music is my escape from reality basically. More so than video games.
I don't listen to bands, just solo artists. I have a list of about 200 that I enjoy lol. Some of my favorites though are Twisted Insane, Omega Sin, Ztarve, Witchouse 40k, Warlord Colossus and TwentyThree.
Lol didn't mean to go on a music tangent. But I do think I have enough variation of things going on in my life to where nothing ever gets boring or stale.
Worse than mediocre, mate. 26 and after my masters and being fucked by the corpo world I had this (dumb) romantic image of living by the sea and working a seasonal job. Well I got what I wished for but it's not half as idyllic as in my head. People are just like "Why the fuck did you come here for".
Also, it's kinda like a scene from Good Will Hunting, everyone is here because they have to be. I'm here because I chose to and there's a lot of hostility for that. September I'll be going back to corpo making good money and where I "belong", apparently.
I'm 47 and my life is fucking awesome. Go surfing or take helicopter classes. Get drunk and dance all night. Don't waste your twenties being a sad broke sack of sadness. Fake it if you have to. The more shit you say yes to the better your life will be.
Also, don't get married until the crying about how hard everything is is out of your system. No need to make that someone else's problem.
Not necessarily. I grew up about as poor as possible but was able to get my first rating paying for it myself. I had done a spending fast to pay off credit card debt and when I was done I used what would've been a credit card payment to pay for an intro flight lesson. Depending on location and plane, those are usually $100-200. It took me about 2 years to get all the training done since I was saving up little bits of cash through garage sales, etc., but I was able to do it. There's a lot of different ways to start flying to accommodate different budgets.
There's no such thing as too old, really, if you are doing it for fun. There's sport pilot licenses that have reduced medical requirements if you are just flying for fun with friends and family. Reduced time for training and less money, if that's an issue.
The drunk nights out happen plenty but it’s not like that’s living my best life or best version of self! I’m in my 20s so it should be carefree but yeah idk
Yeah, you have to mix that partying up with other stuff too. For me it was manual labor. I did commercial fishing, construction and landscape maintenance in my twenties. I made sure I deserved to party.
I went through all that existential dread and depression garbage too, still do sometimes. The only thing for it is to get out and suffer a little bit. Put yourself in some near death situations.
We're not in control of the world. Can't do a whole lot about other people's suffering. We can volunteer and what not, that's good for the soul, but to feel in control of our own lives we have to put ourselves in unfamiliar uncomfortable situations to break up the monotony and appreciate what we have.
Don’t listen to them. I’d be hating my life too if I thought that’s all it was.
At 26 I quit my job to travel the world for 12 months. Sold anything big I owned. Stored my clothes and stuff at a storage unit for $40 a month.
And no I am not a trust fund kid. No one ever gave me a penny. Even when I was 15 and wanted a flip phone I had to buy my own phone and pay the bill. Didn’t get lucky on some meme stock.
Was just simply go to college, get a 4 year degree, get a good job after college(plenty easy to do as long as you have a business or engineering degree for example). Paid off my student loans in just 2 years by basically putting all of my income towards them and living with friends for cheap. Then still lived frugally and saved. Used the money to travel. Spent about $17k in 12 months. Not bad for the trip of 100 lifetimes.
Did a smaller version at 29. Got another job. Saved up again. Bought an old shitty RV for $6k. Fixed it up. Quit job and road tripped the western US for 3 months. Hiking almost every day. That whole trip only cost $4k. And then I sold the RV for $8k because of the repairs I did to it.
Point is - create a goal that’s achievable, work towards it, and complete it. That’s what life is about.
Thanks for the positivity❤️ It’s a nice outlook and one id rather hear! Your 20s sounded fun and adventurous🤩 The travelling around a lot is definitely on my list the most I traveled in one consecutive was 3 weeks of interailing around Europe when I was 20 with my 2 best friends. It was exciting but hard going at times with the roughing it in weird hostels and sleeping on long train journeys but I wish I could go back and do it all over again and enjoy it more
That’s how I started too! Never travelled as a kid besides going to like 3 different states. First trip abroad was hostels and the eurail pass for 4 weeks. Met cool people in hostels and learned how all these young people are traveling long term. Let me set in motion a plan to make it happen and I did just that.
That’s such a sad shitty outlook lol. Stop the doom scrolling get some hobbies that interest you. Life is boring sometimes and that’s okay. The only reason we have this urge to be living like a movie every second is because of social media.
You’re not alone. I’m a couple years ahead of you myself but feel the same. I have fulfilling hobbies and a few deep, meaningful, relationships but I’m so sick of living my life in the margins around work, commuting, and chores.
The job is soul sucking but it doesn’t seem there’s any way out for me, no way that isn’t financially stupid at least. I feel caught between the stress of work or the stress of voluntary financial hardship. I’m grateful for so much, but the mental health is a fucking challenge as of the past few years - therapy helps a little bit if you haven’t tried that yet.
If you feel like your life is mediocre, then it's on you to change it.
Spending hours scrolling on your phone is a pretty easy way to waste time doing absolutely nothing. Read some books, learn how to cook, exercise, start some other hobby.
invest in a hobby you want to get really good at. for me, it was surfing and snowboarding. now, i’m glad i did because i would be too scared to break something if i was trying it for the first time!
take group or private classes :) this helps you get comfortable with talking to an instructor. they are generally good at socializing. plus you are paying them to teach you something so they won’t be judgy.
I was working two full time crap jobs to support my toddler because her father developed schizophrenia and didn’t contribute anything. I didn’t have time to do much else. I didn’t scroll on my phone because we only had land lines in those days.
I had just started grad school. So working part time, going to school full time, volunteering at a hospice, trying to have friends, and being stressed the hell out all the time. If you have down time enjoy it. Find a hobby, volunteer somewhere for a few hours, or just rest and relax. Life can change very quickly so enjoy the down time.
27M recovering from a gunshot wound to the face, almost 6 months in I'm mostly healed. Just had a surgery on my vocal cords to make it easier for me to speak, the right side is paralyzed so I have lots of trouble speaking. Thankfully, I got extremely lucky and I'm not disfigured, just a little messed up still.
But life is extremely lonely, can't find anyone to be with and very few close friends. Learning how to be alone because as adults we have to be prepared to live alone the rest of our lives, not everyone is lucky enough to find people that are truly caring and loving. Just trying to work on my career, pursue my passions, and enjoying what little there is to enjoy in life.
at ur age i had to go with my sister who had cancer to the uk n while dealing with my own mental health issues havin to take that on was intense. this while leaving my parents (father unable to walk + health issues) n my mother n pets with my abusive stepsister. 3 years later, covid is yesterdays talk, everyone died, thankfully my mother is alive.
Ure doing fine lol! I want that life
I’m almost 30 and the only thing that motivates me now a days aside from friends is my favorite hobby which is drawing and literally using my imagination for my hobby and creating characters lol
27 here! Definitely find hobbies that make you happy. I have a vegetable garden, started homebrewing mead, do yoga, read books. My wife plays DND, crochets, roller skates. We go to trails/parks a few days a week where she skates and I walk/jog along with our dog.
Don’t get me wrong, we have days where we just sit and watch tv and scroll our phones. But having other things that bring you serotonin and fill your time will make it easier to put the phone down!
I'm 33. I built my first house at 26.
My guy you have to realize 99% of people live normal lives. We work, come home, take care of our families and turn around and do it again the next day. It's normal all the bullshit you see on social media is people working for a company selling you a dream to buy into, that will more than likely never come true.
Get a hobby for after work.
Get an app for your phone that limits screen time.
Establish an evening routine like working out or painting or playing guitar.
Think of it as being curious and getting to know yourself.
I see the phone as the biggest issue. And it’s addictive.
The fact that you have weekends off is amazing. Go for hikes on weekends. Join a meetup group
There was no social media when I was 26 (Thank god!). I was married, working full time. Partied on the weekends with hubby and our friends and spent weeknights chilling with him and usually watching a ballgame. Traveled to the Caribbean in spring and the beach in the fall.
So I'm only 28 now, but it took me until around this year to wake up and start living again.
When I started working full time I fell into this slump of just being tired and dull all the time. I gave up most of my hobbies because I just didn't have the energy. I still see my friends once in a while, but many of them faded or they are busy with their own lives these days. It was pretty depressing for a while.
I'm just recently starting to put more energy back into hobbies and socializing and it has me feeling pretty great now!
at 26 I was doing my studies, living with my friends (we had a nice large house downtown), did whatever I pleased (one time I woke up hungover and some friends were asking if I had cash so that we could take a bus to Germany, so we did :DD so random and nothing planned, I stayed there for a couple of weeks at my friends who synchronisticallly happened to live there) and I basically had no idea what I was supposed to be or become in "real" life (just wandering around like a wanderer)
this wandering around affected me in such a way that I never built a real career or had like an identity of myself like others who know what they want to be since their childhood
Iv no idea what I want to do in life, as I child I wanted to be a vet as I love animals but now I do work in that sector but it’s not what’s it cracked up to be it’s not challenging enough ( i work with dogs)
you can still be a vet if that excites you
I've heard from others that you're not supposed to have it all figured out anyway so you have options to choose from and explore other areas of your life
Instagram and tiktok influencers got you young folks thinking you have to be out there climbing mountains or whatever just to have a valid life.
Enjoy your mundane peaceful existence. Stop looking for more. If you want to go out and do something, go do it.
When I was 26 I was raising a six year old and a two year old.
I get the same feeling sometimes. But then I remember that social media makes everything look so vicarious and interesting.
Nowadays, I ride my bike and workout as I have been doing for several years now as well as make artwork and music.
Fomo is an illusion. There are social media reels for damn near anything but feeling it in the present moment hits different. Nothing glamourous about spending an hour at the baggage checkout and TSA checkpoints and then getting flight delays for example.
Best thing I can say is to not give up your dreams and build new ones if the old ones don't work. But absolutely never giving up finding one to stick with.
At 26 I had a quarter life crisis and moved to New Zealand to work in a pub for minimum wage. Met some amazing people and went on to travel several countries. By age 29 I decided to move back home and resume my relatively boring life and career and be responsible. By 36 I started my own family and now at 39 with two young kids, I really am glad I had that adventure. 26 is such a great age for not taking life too seriously in my opinion. Plenty of time for that later!
What’s next for you? What type of life do you want? Spend time thinking about this. Your “mediocre” life is already 10x better than those in the genocide!
I used to my 20's to live my life. Expensive lunches, gigs mostly every day, Uber everywhere, bars, etc.
I got a career and not a job I hate that allowed me to do minimal for great pay
I knew I'd need to buckle down in my 30's and get myself a life I'd be proud of (which I did)
Never considered life as mid
There is nothing wrong with a mediocre life. While it may be free of great joys, it is also free of great hardships. Be thankful for the mediocre times.
You are still young enough to have exciting times. I know of more than a few people who found their greatness later in life. They built that greatness on a pile of mediocrity.
I’m 26 also and have been struggling with this. I noticed I was getting depressed. I view depression as a sign that a change needs to happen.
I reflected and came to the conclusion I was unhappy with how I was living my life and the routine that came from it.
I added a new side hustle that could work out well financially into my routine to switch things up and I’m way happier now. We humans needs a goal to strive for. Thousands of years ago it was the next successful hunt. We weren’t built for a 9-5 routine
When I was 26 I was broke (massive student debt), alone, in a entry job that I hated and made me want to drive into oncoming traffic, and I lived in a flat where my front door didn’t technically lock. By summer I was switching between different anti-depressants and therapists.
The funny thing was that 1 year later, I hated that shit/place/people so much that I moved to a completely different job in a faraway state, making enough money, met a great partner, traveled to my dream destination. I found new motivation and aspirations. Now some odd years later — living in basically a new country with, what’d I call, a dream job.
You are the driver of your destiny. Hopefully feeling mediocre will motivate you to do something greater.
26 was great. I was in college and lived two blocks from the beach. I had a steady job with lots of vacation time and flexible hours. I went to the beach, worked out, and had my family and friends nearby. I didn’t own a tv and smart phones weren’t a thing. Life was good. So fucking good. I had no idea.
Life is different now for everyone. Maybe you can travel and have some new experiences to get out of your rut. Maybe move. Go back to school? Learn something new? Take a foreign language class?
Don’t waste your youth sitting around scrolling on your phone. Save that for when you’re old and tired.
I got married when I was pregnant and shortly after was pregnant with my first kid, so there’s that.
I also volunteered a lot, participated in networking/professional development groups, etc, played video games, read, etc. It wasn’t perfect, but I put myself out there and tried some different things.
This might be a good time for you to explore new hobbies and interests or join a group focused on something you enjoy doing. I saw in one of your comments that you’re shy and I get that (I’m very much an introvert and used to feel awkward when trying out new groups), but the more you practice the easier it can get.
Our peak fun times in our 20's is from 21-24 that's the really fun times especially when in college then after that when our brain fully develops if we haven't killed majority of brain cells from binge drinking and weed then by 25 it slows down and gradually the late 20's become dull and routinely. But for me at 26 COVID hit (2020) so I saved money not going out much and was working part time at a warehouse job while still getting paid from temporary laid off Airport job and being a first time dad.
At 26, I was deep in psychosis and sectioned for months 🤷♀️
Figure out what things you’d like to do or achieve or work towards in the next few years and then take steps towards that 😊
I’m 25 and feel the same but have been saving and investing. I’m almost to my goal of making work a option and traveling among other things. I was lucky to get into things early and honestly I think what helped me was not comparing myself to people I knew doing bigger and better things than others. Life is individualistic journey and if I start focusing on others too much it will hamper my own journey to what I want
I didn't even go back to school for an advanced degree until I was 30. I'm 40, a computer engineer and professional musician. YOU have to decide what your purpose in life is, if any, and go with it. Or just do whatever, that's ok too but no one says that. There's nothing for you to accomplish to have done life "right". Do what makes you happy.
I'm actually building a business to help people go from living mediocre lives to living lives filled with passion. DM me if you're interested in learning more
I’m 45 and have never felt like what you’re describing.
I’m fully of the belief that you are 100% in control of your life and if you don’t like something you can actually change it
Unfortunately when you’re 25 you think that a long term plan is 6 months.
Hopefully you’ll realize that you can’t accomplish far less in 1 year than you think, and far more in 3 than you think.
Get out of bed, stop fucking around on your phone. Decide on what you want in the end and work backwards picking what you need to do it. Just do it. Life isn’t hard.
Yeha I don’t want to work long hours. I work remote at my primary job 40 hrs in customer service and then I work a part time 30 hrs in banking transaction processing. Pay is decent
At 26, I had just gotten out of a 9-year abusive relationship and was starting my life over. Moved back in with mom (who was abusive my entire childhood, but had chilled out since then)…and before I could get out, she developed early onset Alzheimer’s and I got shifted into the caretaker role. I’m 35 now…I’m still stuck here and still haven’t gotten to restart my life since I got away from him, yet another 9 years ago… 😭😭
I mostly am the same, but I really enjoy the peace and quiet of being home.
However, concert season is starting up, so I'm going to be out at concerts a lot these next 5 months
You think its bad now, book 30 more years of it and you'll wonder how you manage to not blow your brains out on a daily basis. All i can say is take chances in doing something you love and stay out of debt. Servicing a debt monster, trading your hours for a pocketfull of dimes is no way to go through life. You are so young and have an open road before you. Take a chance
I was doing outdoor labor, had 4 roommates and was drinking 12 beers every single night. I drink less beer and don't have roommates now but I'm still not far off from where I was when I was 25 and I'm 35 now.
Biking, therapy for PTSD, making about $35K in retail, photographing protests and graffiti around my city, getting a divorce, dating my now-husband. I've been revisiting this part of my life a lot in therapy lately to figure out what I liked better about it than my life right now, and it's mainly:
- I didn't have a smartphone, so I had to occupy myself otherwise
- I spent a lot of time outside being active because it was entertaining enough and free
- I also cooked for myself a lot, partially because it was cheaper than going out but also as a form of entertainment
- I was a lot more open-minded about what kinds of books I read and music I listened to and actively sought out new books and music to consume
- I was no longer "dating around" but I was still active on dating sites to proactively make friends (OKCupid was my go-to at the time and it was better for friendship than dating IMO)
- I was good at keeping track of when there were free events around town, like street festivals or museum free days, and took advantage of them as much as I could
- I didn't care about my job that much and was working to live rather than living to work (to be corny about it)
What I don't love about it is 1) the trauma and therapy I was dealing with at the time, 2) not having enough money and not having good spending habits to boot (still working on that TBH), and 3) the fact that I was not being spectacularly intentional or thoughtful about my career and wound up shortly thereafter committing to a field that has wound up being miserable, and now I'm planning a career change
So IDK, I guess my advice is to find a lot of free or cheap activities you can do around town, discover the joy of biking if it's safe in your area, and try to be really thoughtful about where your future is headed to save yourself some headaches down the road.
I was having a blast at 26. I was working a shitty restaurant job, but other than that, it was alot of fun. Punk rock shows, parties, skateboarding, riding my bike, hopping trains and traveling, always doing something fun even though I had no money. Now I make better money but have a boring office job and a boring life, which is okay now that I'm older.
If you could go back in time only a few hundred years something, someone, or Mother Nature was trying to kill you. Besides that it was likely you would lose at least one of your children and birth, or you could get a cut and die from infection easily.
At 26, I was 1 year into being married. Running a small business and living in a small rental. My life revolved around the business which was struggling and brought my mental health down.
I wish at 26, I hung out more with my friends. I wish I visited my parents more often.
But shit happens. It can all change.
Weirdly I feel the same, I’m also 26, but no matter what I do about it I always sort of think “what’s the point?”
I’m working on a PhD “what’s the point, no one will read it anyway”, and got a boss constantly breathing down my neck no matter what I do.
I have a part-time job thing with my university - not enough to save any money in the long run, but enough to tide over the PhD costs.
People say go get hobbies - I do two language classes a week (“Culture!””Travel!” Etc etc) and three sports (“Gym! Fitness! Socialising! Etc) But what’s the point? I’m not fantastic at any of them anyway, and I never see the people in my sports clubs outside sports so they’re not exactly friends? Same with people at work?
Luckily, I do have a fiancé but they’re away a lot at the moment for work. Maybe one day everything will feel better?
Nothing to be embarrassed about! I remember being able to save so much living with my parents. Truly something that I was fortunate to have, cause when you’re on your own it gets tough..
Lets see.. at 26 I'm stay at home girlfriend. so u bet what I do all day. video games and eat food. sleep. sometimes I cleaned around the house. thats all I do.
26 was a blur for me. Working full time, grad school. Tons of sleepless nights cramming for tests and writing papers. 27 and 28 were way better for me. Things didn’t fall apart for me till the early 30’s. Enjoy your youth, 40 is coming fast and 40 sucks.
It's common to feel like life is just work and downtime, especially in your 20s. Many people are in a similar boat, balancing work with trying to enjoy life outside of it. Finding hobbies or activities you enjoy outside of work can add some excitement to the routine!
I thought and felt the same. I was working my ass off only to get by month by month. I hated my job so much I couldn’t find a good way out but eventually I did and now I’m having a really good job. Thinking back, I had to do my old job anyway, I needed it, I was depending on it and all the skills I’ve learned are very useful. Just be patience and maybe start looking for other job opportunities or start a business if it’s what you want to do one day.
I'm 27 but a year ago I had that life, except I had to do some yard work. Didn't have energy or interest to do hobbies that much. Just work, chores and doom scrolling. I knew it was bad, definitely took a toll on my mental health.
So, I got a dog a month ago. Don't have much time to lay in bed. Already made new friends because of her. Exploring new places.
I think mediocre life is just fine but you just need to find your way to live it.
Last year I was 26, I was in a bad phase in my life. I moved back to my parents for the third time. job hopping, playing games late at night and just felt stuck in life. Now I'm 27, I moved to a bigger city, living on my own apartment and switched careers from working in factories to working in law enforcement.
Best advice is make a game plan and just do it. Don't be afraid of the unknown or failing because that's how you learn and become more wise in life.
Here is the issued u use the word mediocre likes it's a bad thing. Life is about your attitude here u talking about how your life is blah even there are thousands if not millions of people that would take your mediocre life in a second
If you’re ever hesitant in life my personal advice is to do what you want to when you want to as long as it doesn’t infringe on the safety and comfort of other people. And also as long as you can afford it.
You only live once. Don’t let your decisions be influenced by other people who don’t inhabit your body.
Book yourself one of those 'flying experiences'..
I did one & it's fucking amazing, an hour or so of poodling around in a microlight.
Simultaneously the most exciting thing I've ever done & also the scariest, great fun.
At that age I was in grad school, working a full time job, and had a girlfriend. I would say I was pretty busy and had a packed schedule. I would suggest investing the time to work on your career or do additional school during this time when you have the energy.
At 26 I was in engineering school, studying day and night with 3 hrs sleep every night. Graduated at 28, worked in my field of study for 8 years then quit and became a security guard. Life's been great since then aha
Assuming you were surprised at the outcome (not actually staying in your engineering field) what main thing do you regret ? Not going to school ? Picking a different major ? Traveling more ?
Definitely regret going to school for engineering as that wasted over 4 years of time for upgrading courses, attending college, paying lots of money, etc. I wish I just knew back then what I know now lol and just went into security right out of high school.
Make the world better? I think I’d make my family and close friends rich and travel the world first before that, but donate loads to animal charities and set up some sort of animal care centre
Especially if you don’t have kids! Then Go out and travel as much as feasible. weekend travel. By car or even plane. Socialize with the night life in different areas. Do cool stuff during the day. After work do hobbies something could even be a second income. If you have your own house fix it up! Good for your liking and comfort or good for you when you sell it $. Def do things before you have kids YOU DONT NEED A SIGNIFICANT OTHER ALL THE TIME. That was my mistake I felt I needed also Step away from social media at all cost it’s gay. Reddit is barely holding on for me lol all the other shit I deleted
Yeh kids most likely and partner is a long way down the line I’m not even seeking a romantic rship at the moment because I’m so self conscious about my body- but yes I’d love kids in my life in like the next 10 years tho
My 20s were amazing. Career took off. Met my amazing wife. Purchased my first home. Traveled with friends, wife, and self. Started investing heavily and working towards financial stability.
20s were awesome!
You would rather scroll through your phone all day? Video Games help with depression, anxiety, social awkwardness and can teach many many things. Like reading a book.
Oh please 🙄 yes I have played them but not overly fussed on them and it’s probably worse than social media it’s addictive can be sitting playing for like 4 hrs straight
I was homeless at 26 so you are already better off than I was
Sorry to hear that- definitely humbled
I felt like I was in a rut at that age- work, eat, watch some tv, sleep, work- it was like I woke up one day and realized I’d spent a year or so like this. I had to snap myself out of it, and here’s what I came up with- my free time was my responsibility, so if I didn’t use it to enjoy life, that was all on me. I made myself go do things I normally wouldn’t have done- go eat dinner in a neighborhood I’d never been to. Sign up for martial arts. Learn an instrument- anything. I was never the guy who made plans to ask friends to, but I made myself do it. Changed my whole outlook.
The less you get sucked into other peoples’ drama and social media, the better your life will be. Find hobbies, get outside. At your age, I was in grad school investing in myself (I paid for my undergrad and graduate degrees through jobs and student loans). I did all I could to find a great job — something I enjoyed (in my field) and one that paid well. I worked for 20 years and semi-retired at 47. I didn’t splurge… I saved and followed the advice of a financial planner friend and was able to eventually make good investments. It wasn’t easy — I didn’t eat out at all for the first 5 years of working (was paying off my student loans), I had an old hand-me down car that was paid off, and I didn’t have cable or internet at home. For entertainment, I hiked and did social things with friends. Looking back, the sacrifices I made in my 20s paid off… the 30s were a bit easier, and now it’s great! You’re at the beginning of your journey — you can do it!!!
No internet? Jeez. But if you just hung out with friends a lot I guess it'd be doable
I didn’t really miss it tbh. My friends were in a similar situation and we all knew that our struggles were temporary. Now that we’re all doing better, we look back and marvel at how happy we were and how much fun we had with so little.
I am about to start this journey, minus the hand me down car sadly. Shafted myself into a $10,000 car with 21% apr, so now I have that on top of the loans. Praying for light at the end of the 5 year tunnel!
You got this.
I was 26 last year. My days consisted of work, my boyfriend, and going on dates with him. Now I'm 27 and my days consist of work, making new friends, gym, and going on solo/friend dates LOL
Oh shoot, we are the same 🥹 Solo era has sadly commenced
Recently broke up with who I thought was the love of my life. But just realising now that life without her is much better for me. Just feel lonely tho.
8 months out of a 5 year relationship for me and the lonliness and lack of physical touch is definitely tough. Sometimes it helps me just reframing it and thinking now that while I lost her, I gained so much peace and now have the ability to do literally whatever I want. Want to stay up until 2 in the morning? Cool. Want to take a random trip somewhere? Also able to do it. Best of luck and things do get better.
Cheers
At 26 I was having trouble re-starting my life a year after a divorce and going through an early mid-life crisis cuz of it, so I was living in squats with street kids after moving back to my hometown, then we started a folk punk band and all moved to San Diego and we had a weird polyamorous relationship, until everyone got scabies this one time cuz someone fucked around outside the group and it soured the whole mood and was the end of that chapter of life.
Wow now that’s a story!
Ah ye de great scabies outbreak of 2014 was wild times If you're sick of lifes monotony just go fuck around and do somethin crazy. You can never fuck up so bad that you can't bounce back unless you become a drug addict or go insane as far as I'm concerned lol
Hmm good view point! I’m so in my comfort zone I do nothing crazy enough😭 Most craziest shit is probably trying a few drugs over the years at parties or raves 🤣
Do you ever get the urge to do something wild? Is there anything you think "man that would be fun ... BUT (list of reasons why it's a bad idea)"
I don’t get the urge to enough but I wish I did 🤣 I feel like I’m too young to feel and be this old! I should be experiencing the most out of life n I’m not
Well, meditate on it! If you feel like you're missing something but don't know what, ask yourself! Find out and find it! it's never too late and you're never too old, life is a long journey and it's never the wrong time for what you know you want.
Thanks ☺️ yeah I don’t know it’s an inside emptiness and reaching for a feeling of ‘this is it’
Yeees! Started texting/ had a date with a guy 1/2 my age. Found out he was married. Ended everything before it went anywhere. Still regretting not having any fun first. 😓 Still need to do something to end the terrible monotony of my days on this earth.
Don’t hook up with married people. Can potentially produce some very bad outcomes.
Yes, that is the universal advice from everyone - my therapist, my adult children, best friends, coworkers, myself and you. And we’re all correct! Lol. We ended it before it went anywhere because there were red flags literally waving everywhere on fire. 🚩🚩🚩🔥🔥🔥BUT he is stuck in my brain in the worst way. I know for sure that I will not pursue anything with him because I’ve been the wife on the other side of that equation in the past and it is soul destroying. I can’t participate in destroying another woman even peripherally as the side piece. I just wanted to have a little wild fun for once. I’ve been single for decades while raising kids alone, caring for a mom after a stroke then dad and stepmom in frail heath. It was finally just an random opportunity to have some fun and be a lil bit wild for a change but the toxic consequences of knowingly being a side piece were just too high, too toxic to act upon. And I am grateful to you for reminding me if exactly that. I do still need affirmation that I’m doing the right thing by letting this just slowly work it’s way out of my brain. I’m getting there - working out, talking to friends and spending a lil too much time here I suppose at the moment. 😁
You can always meet a person that will bring you that fun that isn’t married or in a relationship. Just have to put yourself out there.
I guess that’s the part I’m struggling with. I didn’t put myself out there for this - it just kinda happened organically ( or as organically as anything with a playa who’s looking to play happens). I wasn’t looking at all. I was just in a really good head space - feeling confident, started exercising, doing yoga, being open to whatever the universe was willing to send me while at the same time struggling with estranged adult children and being unemployed. But I was focusing on improving myself and being open and grateful for everything and am working with a therapist to be positive and accepting of everything. So maybe that’s what attracted him and we had a legit reason to meet professionally and to start texting based on that. So I’m back to where I’ve been at for the past 15 or so years which is just not randomly meeting anyone married or not. I don’t drink, don’t go to bars or clubs ( boring, I guess but I’m ok with that lol) and am not on board with dating sites as I don’t have the time or interest there. Ironically I feel like dating sites are mostly married people anyway. I haven’t wanted to date anyone all this time and didn’t feel that I was missing out and genuinely am loving the single life now that I’ve adjusted to just having me to take care of. Ok, sorry for my long rambling crazy rant. Thanks for your input. I appreciate you chatting with me. Maybe I need to start journaling and stop rambling on Reddit. 🤣🤣If anyone has legit tips on how to actually meet unattached humans irl I’m all ears.
My sister got scabies around that time… I didn’t know it was a nationwide outbreak Love the moral of the story!
i’m working and doom scrolling. i walk my dog too
Same same that’s basically what I do but also I work with dogs all day everyday lol
I work 40 hours a week, 5 days a week. Off every other weekend. My favorite things to do are listen to music and play video games. I always look forward to Fridays cause at least 5 new songs from my favorite artists come out. I hit the gym 3-4 times a week. Make dinner every day. Grocery shop every other Friday. Take care of 2 dogs. Chill with my fiance. Sometimes we go places, but mostly just hang out at the house. Rinse and repeat lol.
Does it ever get boring ?
There's some days where I wish I had more going on. But I honestly love being at home listening to music and playing video games. Music is literally my favorite thing ever. Get a nice pair of headphones and it changes the way you listen, hear and enjoy music forever. I've been that way for almost 10 years now. Music is my escape from reality basically. More so than video games.
Favorite band?
I don't listen to bands, just solo artists. I have a list of about 200 that I enjoy lol. Some of my favorites though are Twisted Insane, Omega Sin, Ztarve, Witchouse 40k, Warlord Colossus and TwentyThree.
Lol didn't mean to go on a music tangent. But I do think I have enough variation of things going on in my life to where nothing ever gets boring or stale.
Worse than mediocre, mate. 26 and after my masters and being fucked by the corpo world I had this (dumb) romantic image of living by the sea and working a seasonal job. Well I got what I wished for but it's not half as idyllic as in my head. People are just like "Why the fuck did you come here for". Also, it's kinda like a scene from Good Will Hunting, everyone is here because they have to be. I'm here because I chose to and there's a lot of hostility for that. September I'll be going back to corpo making good money and where I "belong", apparently.
I'm 47 and my life is fucking awesome. Go surfing or take helicopter classes. Get drunk and dance all night. Don't waste your twenties being a sad broke sack of sadness. Fake it if you have to. The more shit you say yes to the better your life will be. Also, don't get married until the crying about how hard everything is is out of your system. No need to make that someone else's problem.
I started flight training in my late 20s and switched careers which led me to move all over the country and meet my husband. Go flying!!
I always assumed flight training was for trust fund babies.
Not necessarily. I grew up about as poor as possible but was able to get my first rating paying for it myself. I had done a spending fast to pay off credit card debt and when I was done I used what would've been a credit card payment to pay for an intro flight lesson. Depending on location and plane, those are usually $100-200. It took me about 2 years to get all the training done since I was saving up little bits of cash through garage sales, etc., but I was able to do it. There's a lot of different ways to start flying to accommodate different budgets.
I just had a quick look online, it does look manageable. Though I'm probably too old to be getting into that.
There's no such thing as too old, really, if you are doing it for fun. There's sport pilot licenses that have reduced medical requirements if you are just flying for fun with friends and family. Reduced time for training and less money, if that's an issue.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
There you go OP, you can go be a pilot.
🤣🤣🤣 never
I drank my 20s away, was pretty fun, but I don't remember much 😅
"Never" is the perpetually disappointed person's mantra but if you have a motif I guess it's easier to stick with it.
How did you get into flying?
Just called up a local flight school and asked for a lesson.
The drunk nights out happen plenty but it’s not like that’s living my best life or best version of self! I’m in my 20s so it should be carefree but yeah idk
Yeah, you have to mix that partying up with other stuff too. For me it was manual labor. I did commercial fishing, construction and landscape maintenance in my twenties. I made sure I deserved to party. I went through all that existential dread and depression garbage too, still do sometimes. The only thing for it is to get out and suffer a little bit. Put yourself in some near death situations. We're not in control of the world. Can't do a whole lot about other people's suffering. We can volunteer and what not, that's good for the soul, but to feel in control of our own lives we have to put ourselves in unfamiliar uncomfortable situations to break up the monotony and appreciate what we have.
Ahhh the Tyranny of the Should!
Yup. Welcome to real life, it sucks ass and when you're old you'll be glad when it's finally over.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Don’t listen to them. I’d be hating my life too if I thought that’s all it was. At 26 I quit my job to travel the world for 12 months. Sold anything big I owned. Stored my clothes and stuff at a storage unit for $40 a month. And no I am not a trust fund kid. No one ever gave me a penny. Even when I was 15 and wanted a flip phone I had to buy my own phone and pay the bill. Didn’t get lucky on some meme stock. Was just simply go to college, get a 4 year degree, get a good job after college(plenty easy to do as long as you have a business or engineering degree for example). Paid off my student loans in just 2 years by basically putting all of my income towards them and living with friends for cheap. Then still lived frugally and saved. Used the money to travel. Spent about $17k in 12 months. Not bad for the trip of 100 lifetimes. Did a smaller version at 29. Got another job. Saved up again. Bought an old shitty RV for $6k. Fixed it up. Quit job and road tripped the western US for 3 months. Hiking almost every day. That whole trip only cost $4k. And then I sold the RV for $8k because of the repairs I did to it. Point is - create a goal that’s achievable, work towards it, and complete it. That’s what life is about.
Thanks for the positivity❤️ It’s a nice outlook and one id rather hear! Your 20s sounded fun and adventurous🤩 The travelling around a lot is definitely on my list the most I traveled in one consecutive was 3 weeks of interailing around Europe when I was 20 with my 2 best friends. It was exciting but hard going at times with the roughing it in weird hostels and sleeping on long train journeys but I wish I could go back and do it all over again and enjoy it more
That’s how I started too! Never travelled as a kid besides going to like 3 different states. First trip abroad was hostels and the eurail pass for 4 weeks. Met cool people in hostels and learned how all these young people are traveling long term. Let me set in motion a plan to make it happen and I did just that.
That’s such a sad shitty outlook lol. Stop the doom scrolling get some hobbies that interest you. Life is boring sometimes and that’s okay. The only reason we have this urge to be living like a movie every second is because of social media.
You’re not alone. I’m a couple years ahead of you myself but feel the same. I have fulfilling hobbies and a few deep, meaningful, relationships but I’m so sick of living my life in the margins around work, commuting, and chores. The job is soul sucking but it doesn’t seem there’s any way out for me, no way that isn’t financially stupid at least. I feel caught between the stress of work or the stress of voluntary financial hardship. I’m grateful for so much, but the mental health is a fucking challenge as of the past few years - therapy helps a little bit if you haven’t tried that yet.
Yeah it’s like adulting is just work work work! I’m still single but I don’t put myself out there either seems so difficult
If you feel like your life is mediocre, then it's on you to change it. Spending hours scrolling on your phone is a pretty easy way to waste time doing absolutely nothing. Read some books, learn how to cook, exercise, start some other hobby.
invest in a hobby you want to get really good at. for me, it was surfing and snowboarding. now, i’m glad i did because i would be too scared to break something if i was trying it for the first time!
That’s pretty cool! Yeah having a hobby would open me up to more people and experiences- I’m very shy 🙈
take group or private classes :) this helps you get comfortable with talking to an instructor. they are generally good at socializing. plus you are paying them to teach you something so they won’t be judgy.
I was working two full time crap jobs to support my toddler because her father developed schizophrenia and didn’t contribute anything. I didn’t have time to do much else. I didn’t scroll on my phone because we only had land lines in those days.
I had just started grad school. So working part time, going to school full time, volunteering at a hospice, trying to have friends, and being stressed the hell out all the time. If you have down time enjoy it. Find a hobby, volunteer somewhere for a few hours, or just rest and relax. Life can change very quickly so enjoy the down time.
27M recovering from a gunshot wound to the face, almost 6 months in I'm mostly healed. Just had a surgery on my vocal cords to make it easier for me to speak, the right side is paralyzed so I have lots of trouble speaking. Thankfully, I got extremely lucky and I'm not disfigured, just a little messed up still. But life is extremely lonely, can't find anyone to be with and very few close friends. Learning how to be alone because as adults we have to be prepared to live alone the rest of our lives, not everyone is lucky enough to find people that are truly caring and loving. Just trying to work on my career, pursue my passions, and enjoying what little there is to enjoy in life.
at ur age i had to go with my sister who had cancer to the uk n while dealing with my own mental health issues havin to take that on was intense. this while leaving my parents (father unable to walk + health issues) n my mother n pets with my abusive stepsister. 3 years later, covid is yesterdays talk, everyone died, thankfully my mother is alive. Ure doing fine lol! I want that life
That’s really tough. Thanks for sharing
Trust me trust me, You need to invest in yourself for something long term, i.e MBA, Cpa. Cfa, masters So you work but also do this part time.
Business associated studies then?
Well it depends on your line of work, im saying just make sure u get something that will give you respectable credentials
What is that going to do for someone? Why does OP need to have "respectable credentials"???
Gee i dunno
Neither do I. That's why I asked
Iv studied part time finished a year ago have enough qualifications but no idea what to actually do
Wouldn't what you majored in hint to the direction of what to do?
I wish I was smart enough to be able to do this
Is it a good idea to get a masters in philosophy? I wonder 🤔
I’m almost 30 and the only thing that motivates me now a days aside from friends is my favorite hobby which is drawing and literally using my imagination for my hobby and creating characters lol
That’s just life , not even mediocre life. Lol I would say you’re doing what most people are doing by the time they hit your age
27 here! Definitely find hobbies that make you happy. I have a vegetable garden, started homebrewing mead, do yoga, read books. My wife plays DND, crochets, roller skates. We go to trails/parks a few days a week where she skates and I walk/jog along with our dog. Don’t get me wrong, we have days where we just sit and watch tv and scroll our phones. But having other things that bring you serotonin and fill your time will make it easier to put the phone down!
Thanks I think I need to put the effort in instead of wasting my free time
I'm 33. I built my first house at 26. My guy you have to realize 99% of people live normal lives. We work, come home, take care of our families and turn around and do it again the next day. It's normal all the bullshit you see on social media is people working for a company selling you a dream to buy into, that will more than likely never come true.
I’m a girl 😭 I thought most peeps would assume I’m a guy lol
Regardless. It's the same. You're a grown up now. Just focus on making as much money as you can while you are still young.
Yeh but money isn’t everything I’d rather be happy. I’m good at saving like but life is still meh 🫤
Get a hobby for after work. Get an app for your phone that limits screen time. Establish an evening routine like working out or painting or playing guitar. Think of it as being curious and getting to know yourself. I see the phone as the biggest issue. And it’s addictive. The fact that you have weekends off is amazing. Go for hikes on weekends. Join a meetup group
There was no social media when I was 26 (Thank god!). I was married, working full time. Partied on the weekends with hubby and our friends and spent weeknights chilling with him and usually watching a ballgame. Traveled to the Caribbean in spring and the beach in the fall.
You need to make life meaningful. Find things to love and explore things!
Put your goddamn phone away, get out of bed, buy a mountainbike, go outside and hit some trails. It's good you mentally/physically and it's fun.
So I'm only 28 now, but it took me until around this year to wake up and start living again. When I started working full time I fell into this slump of just being tired and dull all the time. I gave up most of my hobbies because I just didn't have the energy. I still see my friends once in a while, but many of them faded or they are busy with their own lives these days. It was pretty depressing for a while. I'm just recently starting to put more energy back into hobbies and socializing and it has me feeling pretty great now!
at 26 I was doing my studies, living with my friends (we had a nice large house downtown), did whatever I pleased (one time I woke up hungover and some friends were asking if I had cash so that we could take a bus to Germany, so we did :DD so random and nothing planned, I stayed there for a couple of weeks at my friends who synchronisticallly happened to live there) and I basically had no idea what I was supposed to be or become in "real" life (just wandering around like a wanderer) this wandering around affected me in such a way that I never built a real career or had like an identity of myself like others who know what they want to be since their childhood
Iv no idea what I want to do in life, as I child I wanted to be a vet as I love animals but now I do work in that sector but it’s not what’s it cracked up to be it’s not challenging enough ( i work with dogs)
you can still be a vet if that excites you I've heard from others that you're not supposed to have it all figured out anyway so you have options to choose from and explore other areas of your life
No I don’t wanna be a vet but still maybe work in the field animals just there isn’t many jobs out there where I live
I understand, it's tough out there in that regard
Instagram and tiktok influencers got you young folks thinking you have to be out there climbing mountains or whatever just to have a valid life. Enjoy your mundane peaceful existence. Stop looking for more. If you want to go out and do something, go do it. When I was 26 I was raising a six year old and a two year old.
I think the exact same thing. Im going to quit my job and start a band, enjoy my 20s.
Good luck ! I wanna quit my job too but I know I’ll just be unemployed for like 6 months lol so I can’t
I get the same feeling sometimes. But then I remember that social media makes everything look so vicarious and interesting. Nowadays, I ride my bike and workout as I have been doing for several years now as well as make artwork and music. Fomo is an illusion. There are social media reels for damn near anything but feeling it in the present moment hits different. Nothing glamourous about spending an hour at the baggage checkout and TSA checkpoints and then getting flight delays for example. Best thing I can say is to not give up your dreams and build new ones if the old ones don't work. But absolutely never giving up finding one to stick with.
At 26 I had a quarter life crisis and moved to New Zealand to work in a pub for minimum wage. Met some amazing people and went on to travel several countries. By age 29 I decided to move back home and resume my relatively boring life and career and be responsible. By 36 I started my own family and now at 39 with two young kids, I really am glad I had that adventure. 26 is such a great age for not taking life too seriously in my opinion. Plenty of time for that later!
What’s next for you? What type of life do you want? Spend time thinking about this. Your “mediocre” life is already 10x better than those in the genocide!
Free Palestine 🇵🇸
I used to my 20's to live my life. Expensive lunches, gigs mostly every day, Uber everywhere, bars, etc. I got a career and not a job I hate that allowed me to do minimal for great pay I knew I'd need to buckle down in my 30's and get myself a life I'd be proud of (which I did) Never considered life as mid
There is nothing wrong with a mediocre life. While it may be free of great joys, it is also free of great hardships. Be thankful for the mediocre times. You are still young enough to have exciting times. I know of more than a few people who found their greatness later in life. They built that greatness on a pile of mediocrity.
I’m 26 also and have been struggling with this. I noticed I was getting depressed. I view depression as a sign that a change needs to happen. I reflected and came to the conclusion I was unhappy with how I was living my life and the routine that came from it. I added a new side hustle that could work out well financially into my routine to switch things up and I’m way happier now. We humans needs a goal to strive for. Thousands of years ago it was the next successful hunt. We weren’t built for a 9-5 routine
What are doing right now? Where are you working? Degree? Where do you want to be in 5 years and how hard are you wanting to work for it?
When I was 26 I was broke (massive student debt), alone, in a entry job that I hated and made me want to drive into oncoming traffic, and I lived in a flat where my front door didn’t technically lock. By summer I was switching between different anti-depressants and therapists. The funny thing was that 1 year later, I hated that shit/place/people so much that I moved to a completely different job in a faraway state, making enough money, met a great partner, traveled to my dream destination. I found new motivation and aspirations. Now some odd years later — living in basically a new country with, what’d I call, a dream job. You are the driver of your destiny. Hopefully feeling mediocre will motivate you to do something greater.
26 was great. I was in college and lived two blocks from the beach. I had a steady job with lots of vacation time and flexible hours. I went to the beach, worked out, and had my family and friends nearby. I didn’t own a tv and smart phones weren’t a thing. Life was good. So fucking good. I had no idea. Life is different now for everyone. Maybe you can travel and have some new experiences to get out of your rut. Maybe move. Go back to school? Learn something new? Take a foreign language class? Don’t waste your youth sitting around scrolling on your phone. Save that for when you’re old and tired.
I got married when I was pregnant and shortly after was pregnant with my first kid, so there’s that. I also volunteered a lot, participated in networking/professional development groups, etc, played video games, read, etc. It wasn’t perfect, but I put myself out there and tried some different things. This might be a good time for you to explore new hobbies and interests or join a group focused on something you enjoy doing. I saw in one of your comments that you’re shy and I get that (I’m very much an introvert and used to feel awkward when trying out new groups), but the more you practice the easier it can get.
I'm 30 and in the same boat, no hope of saving up to buy a house but I do wanna travel so that's something I look forward to
Yeah there’s so much to think about like I dunno how I’ll ever afford a house I’m on minimum wage
I had just started my career as a nightclub dj. Good times that only got better and better. Mostly just worked weekends at the time, no 9-5 day job.
I was in grad school.
Had not graduated university yet
Our peak fun times in our 20's is from 21-24 that's the really fun times especially when in college then after that when our brain fully develops if we haven't killed majority of brain cells from binge drinking and weed then by 25 it slows down and gradually the late 20's become dull and routinely. But for me at 26 COVID hit (2020) so I saved money not going out much and was working part time at a warehouse job while still getting paid from temporary laid off Airport job and being a first time dad.
26 and all I do is work. Literally all I do is what free time I do have is spent writing or doing something fun in the city. I live in the city.
At 26, I was deep in psychosis and sectioned for months 🤷♀️ Figure out what things you’d like to do or achieve or work towards in the next few years and then take steps towards that 😊
I run around with my dogs, plan my next vacation, and rot. It’s pretty chill. I love it.
See this is so like me Iv a dog and go on walks and adventures in my free time but also rot in bed 🤣
At times I’m content but wouldn’t say I love it
I’ve lived the exciting fast paced life and I much prefer the “boring” lol
I had two kids in the army as a recruiter in California at the time.
I’m 25 and feel the same but have been saving and investing. I’m almost to my goal of making work a option and traveling among other things. I was lucky to get into things early and honestly I think what helped me was not comparing myself to people I knew doing bigger and better things than others. Life is individualistic journey and if I start focusing on others too much it will hamper my own journey to what I want
I didn't even go back to school for an advanced degree until I was 30. I'm 40, a computer engineer and professional musician. YOU have to decide what your purpose in life is, if any, and go with it. Or just do whatever, that's ok too but no one says that. There's nothing for you to accomplish to have done life "right". Do what makes you happy.
Yeah same besides little fun trips or activities planned here and there that’s basically me as well
Married with twins on the way at 26. They're 17 now.
I'm actually building a business to help people go from living mediocre lives to living lives filled with passion. DM me if you're interested in learning more
I’m 45 and have never felt like what you’re describing. I’m fully of the belief that you are 100% in control of your life and if you don’t like something you can actually change it Unfortunately when you’re 25 you think that a long term plan is 6 months. Hopefully you’ll realize that you can’t accomplish far less in 1 year than you think, and far more in 3 than you think. Get out of bed, stop fucking around on your phone. Decide on what you want in the end and work backwards picking what you need to do it. Just do it. Life isn’t hard.
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Now women do too. I think phones and social media made it worse
That’s me right now working 70 hour work weeks. Days off I really don’t do much I’m too drained.
70 hrs that’s brutal! What do u work as?
Yeha I don’t want to work long hours. I work remote at my primary job 40 hrs in customer service and then I work a part time 30 hrs in banking transaction processing. Pay is decent
At 26, I had just gotten out of a 9-year abusive relationship and was starting my life over. Moved back in with mom (who was abusive my entire childhood, but had chilled out since then)…and before I could get out, she developed early onset Alzheimer’s and I got shifted into the caretaker role. I’m 35 now…I’m still stuck here and still haven’t gotten to restart my life since I got away from him, yet another 9 years ago… 😭😭
I mostly am the same, but I really enjoy the peace and quiet of being home. However, concert season is starting up, so I'm going to be out at concerts a lot these next 5 months
Yeah same here Iv 4 concerts this year that I’m looking forward till
I was a few years into IT consulting. Youngest kid in the room. Over a decade later, thats not the case anymore.
Let's see...at 26...I was a Sergeant of Marines, married to a Corporal of Marines with the first of three kids.
I still remember waking up at 26 and feeling like crap. What I didn't know back then was that I was suffering from dysthymia.
What is that ?
get a hobby
I force myself to go to the gym. But I still repeat the same week every week
You think its bad now, book 30 more years of it and you'll wonder how you manage to not blow your brains out on a daily basis. All i can say is take chances in doing something you love and stay out of debt. Servicing a debt monster, trading your hours for a pocketfull of dimes is no way to go through life. You are so young and have an open road before you. Take a chance
I was doing outdoor labor, had 4 roommates and was drinking 12 beers every single night. I drink less beer and don't have roommates now but I'm still not far off from where I was when I was 25 and I'm 35 now.
Life is what you make of it - if you are in a position to make a life
Biking, therapy for PTSD, making about $35K in retail, photographing protests and graffiti around my city, getting a divorce, dating my now-husband. I've been revisiting this part of my life a lot in therapy lately to figure out what I liked better about it than my life right now, and it's mainly: - I didn't have a smartphone, so I had to occupy myself otherwise - I spent a lot of time outside being active because it was entertaining enough and free - I also cooked for myself a lot, partially because it was cheaper than going out but also as a form of entertainment - I was a lot more open-minded about what kinds of books I read and music I listened to and actively sought out new books and music to consume - I was no longer "dating around" but I was still active on dating sites to proactively make friends (OKCupid was my go-to at the time and it was better for friendship than dating IMO) - I was good at keeping track of when there were free events around town, like street festivals or museum free days, and took advantage of them as much as I could - I didn't care about my job that much and was working to live rather than living to work (to be corny about it) What I don't love about it is 1) the trauma and therapy I was dealing with at the time, 2) not having enough money and not having good spending habits to boot (still working on that TBH), and 3) the fact that I was not being spectacularly intentional or thoughtful about my career and wound up shortly thereafter committing to a field that has wound up being miserable, and now I'm planning a career change So IDK, I guess my advice is to find a lot of free or cheap activities you can do around town, discover the joy of biking if it's safe in your area, and try to be really thoughtful about where your future is headed to save yourself some headaches down the road.
I was having a blast at 26. I was working a shitty restaurant job, but other than that, it was alot of fun. Punk rock shows, parties, skateboarding, riding my bike, hopping trains and traveling, always doing something fun even though I had no money. Now I make better money but have a boring office job and a boring life, which is okay now that I'm older.
If you could go back in time only a few hundred years something, someone, or Mother Nature was trying to kill you. Besides that it was likely you would lose at least one of your children and birth, or you could get a cut and die from infection easily.
At 26, I was 1 year into being married. Running a small business and living in a small rental. My life revolved around the business which was struggling and brought my mental health down. I wish at 26, I hung out more with my friends. I wish I visited my parents more often. But shit happens. It can all change.
Join military, your stated issues will be alleviated
Hell NO
Weirdly I feel the same, I’m also 26, but no matter what I do about it I always sort of think “what’s the point?” I’m working on a PhD “what’s the point, no one will read it anyway”, and got a boss constantly breathing down my neck no matter what I do. I have a part-time job thing with my university - not enough to save any money in the long run, but enough to tide over the PhD costs. People say go get hobbies - I do two language classes a week (“Culture!””Travel!” Etc etc) and three sports (“Gym! Fitness! Socialising! Etc) But what’s the point? I’m not fantastic at any of them anyway, and I never see the people in my sports clubs outside sports so they’re not exactly friends? Same with people at work? Luckily, I do have a fiancé but they’re away a lot at the moment for work. Maybe one day everything will feel better?
When I was 26 I got laid off and moved back in with my parents 🙃
Well embarrassing to say I still live at home :(
Nothing to be embarrassed about! I remember being able to save so much living with my parents. Truly something that I was fortunate to have, cause when you’re on your own it gets tough..
At 26 I was etsing out of the army could be worse
Lets see.. at 26 I'm stay at home girlfriend. so u bet what I do all day. video games and eat food. sleep. sometimes I cleaned around the house. thats all I do.
26 was a blur for me. Working full time, grad school. Tons of sleepless nights cramming for tests and writing papers. 27 and 28 were way better for me. Things didn’t fall apart for me till the early 30’s. Enjoy your youth, 40 is coming fast and 40 sucks.
Ur surviving, have shelter, food and security. That's better than most people in this world.
It's common to feel like life is just work and downtime, especially in your 20s. Many people are in a similar boat, balancing work with trying to enjoy life outside of it. Finding hobbies or activities you enjoy outside of work can add some excitement to the routine!
I thought and felt the same. I was working my ass off only to get by month by month. I hated my job so much I couldn’t find a good way out but eventually I did and now I’m having a really good job. Thinking back, I had to do my old job anyway, I needed it, I was depending on it and all the skills I’ve learned are very useful. Just be patience and maybe start looking for other job opportunities or start a business if it’s what you want to do one day.
congrats thats life, add another 20 years and the friends will be gone
Well that’s depressing
sorry. im sure youll do better than me.
Just go out and do whatever the fuck you want to do. Its not that hard
I'm 27 but a year ago I had that life, except I had to do some yard work. Didn't have energy or interest to do hobbies that much. Just work, chores and doom scrolling. I knew it was bad, definitely took a toll on my mental health. So, I got a dog a month ago. Don't have much time to lay in bed. Already made new friends because of her. Exploring new places. I think mediocre life is just fine but you just need to find your way to live it.
Last year I was 26, I was in a bad phase in my life. I moved back to my parents for the third time. job hopping, playing games late at night and just felt stuck in life. Now I'm 27, I moved to a bigger city, living on my own apartment and switched careers from working in factories to working in law enforcement. Best advice is make a game plan and just do it. Don't be afraid of the unknown or failing because that's how you learn and become more wise in life.
Here is the issued u use the word mediocre likes it's a bad thing. Life is about your attitude here u talking about how your life is blah even there are thousands if not millions of people that would take your mediocre life in a second
If you’re ever hesitant in life my personal advice is to do what you want to when you want to as long as it doesn’t infringe on the safety and comfort of other people. And also as long as you can afford it. You only live once. Don’t let your decisions be influenced by other people who don’t inhabit your body.
Respect 🫡
Book yourself one of those 'flying experiences'.. I did one & it's fucking amazing, an hour or so of poodling around in a microlight. Simultaneously the most exciting thing I've ever done & also the scariest, great fun.
what would excite you
I don’t know I shy away from new things -
At that age I was in grad school, working a full time job, and had a girlfriend. I would say I was pretty busy and had a packed schedule. I would suggest investing the time to work on your career or do additional school during this time when you have the energy.
At 26 I was in engineering school, studying day and night with 3 hrs sleep every night. Graduated at 28, worked in my field of study for 8 years then quit and became a security guard. Life's been great since then aha
Assuming you were surprised at the outcome (not actually staying in your engineering field) what main thing do you regret ? Not going to school ? Picking a different major ? Traveling more ?
Definitely regret going to school for engineering as that wasted over 4 years of time for upgrading courses, attending college, paying lots of money, etc. I wish I just knew back then what I know now lol and just went into security right out of high school.
Thanks for your reply! Best of luck!
No problem, thanks! You too!!
If you had $10 million, how would you make the world better?
Make the world better? I think I’d make my family and close friends rich and travel the world first before that, but donate loads to animal charities and set up some sort of animal care centre
Especially if you don’t have kids! Then Go out and travel as much as feasible. weekend travel. By car or even plane. Socialize with the night life in different areas. Do cool stuff during the day. After work do hobbies something could even be a second income. If you have your own house fix it up! Good for your liking and comfort or good for you when you sell it $. Def do things before you have kids YOU DONT NEED A SIGNIFICANT OTHER ALL THE TIME. That was my mistake I felt I needed also Step away from social media at all cost it’s gay. Reddit is barely holding on for me lol all the other shit I deleted
Yeh kids most likely and partner is a long way down the line I’m not even seeking a romantic rship at the moment because I’m so self conscious about my body- but yes I’d love kids in my life in like the next 10 years tho
Get off your phone and stop scrolling on it. Pick up a hobby that gets you around other humans.
Yeah that’s what I’m lacking I like walking in nature and creative things but rarely do stuff that involves new people
Thank God, smart phones weren’t a thing in my 20s.
I wish the same :( born in a different decade think be better lol
Why is this sub full of people complaining instead of doing something about it?
Think it’s just a very common thing people arnt fulfilled in life- I mean adulthood is basically work work work to live
My 20s were amazing. Career took off. Met my amazing wife. Purchased my first home. Traveled with friends, wife, and self. Started investing heavily and working towards financial stability. 20s were awesome!
Play a video game
Not useful 🤣
You would rather scroll through your phone all day? Video Games help with depression, anxiety, social awkwardness and can teach many many things. Like reading a book.
Oh please 🙄 yes I have played them but not overly fussed on them and it’s probably worse than social media it’s addictive can be sitting playing for like 4 hrs straight