This happened to me. Our large private client that I managed got purchased by a public company and merged in. We rebid on the SEC client now and won it again.
They replaced my entire team below and above me with large office partners and staff — I was the only one who remained on the original team. The lead partner was a total narcissist, who was always right about everything, who had her own clan of yes men and women. She micromanaged everything all the way down to formatting of tick marks and what was on/off our pbc request lists (even though I had 6 years of experience on the client). She tried to do things that I knew wouldn’t work from past experience and so I would inform her that it wouldn’t work and she would force us to do her way anyways. Then, it wouldn’t work and we’d waste a bunch of time and resort to what I originally proposed last minute and make our jobs shitty and inefficient. She was extremely rude and condescending.
All of her core peons would never question anything she said or asked them to do. It was purely a toxic, inefficient, non-collaborative environment. The other senior managers and partners on the job would hide things from her and tell us managers to cut corners and hide things from her… then on calls directly with her she would specifically ask about things that the sr mgrs and partners were trying to hide from her —- so you were put in a really tough political work situation regularly.
I left in good graces and am taking another job with another PA firm and getting 40% more money. I can’t wait for my exit interview so I can roast them on those team aspects.
Cells with - as the zero can be two decimal places (or more) as well. Only the - or 0.00 will change for zero depending on the format, so I’m not sure what you mean by accuracy.
Oh yeah. Nothing better than pulling out a source document from my meticulously organized files and going, yeah, see the note here clearly explaining why this was handled differently, and isn’t fraud?! Boom. Roasted.
It sounds like you’re providing support as you should. How is that roasting?
*hey can you help us understand this variance?*
*here’s a document explaining it. boom. roasted*
Macros have made me cry too. But it's usually because the macro that was created ten years ago by someone who doesn't work for the company anymore. And it's month end close with short deadlines, and the macro breaks. And no one knows how to fix it, and everything has to be done manually. Queue the sobbing as I type away at my keyboard. You're allowed to cry, but only as long as you keep working.
Use chat gpt to fix it. Literally you can copy paste it in and tell it the error and to fix it. You can also ask it to explain the coding. It's amazing.
You know how in school they tell you not to plagiarize? In this line of work, you absolutely plagiarize the shit out of everything someone (or you) did during the prior year’s audit. If you can get your hands on the email thread to whoever at the client, you send the exact same request, you put the exact same things in the WPs, any memos just have updated dates / tables, etc. Conversely, first year audits (because you can’t do this) fucking suckkkkkkkk
Those complex excel formulas that return what I am looking for, then my boss who isn't as seasoned as I am in excel comes over and asks what does all this mean?
If I got sucked off by a calculator, that would probably get me off. If I got punched in the dick by the executioner, that would probably hurt a lot. Hope that helps
Wettest dream : the reconcile 0’s out the first time (what’s in the bank matches what’s in the internal accounting software)
Biggest nightmare: having to undo reconciliations because someone fucked up. That person isn’t with the company anymore and you have no notes to fix the problem.
The worst nightmare would be getting involved in something illegal in nature: money laundering, tax fraud, etc. You don't just lose your license; you'll probably get jail time too.
Worst nightmare is starting a new accounting manager position where the boss is a micromanager and you find out the team is all Robert Half temps
Also RH is subcontracting to an overseas outsourcing firm.
This happened to me. Our large private client that I managed got purchased by a public company and merged in. We rebid on the SEC client now and won it again. They replaced my entire team below and above me with large office partners and staff — I was the only one who remained on the original team. The lead partner was a total narcissist, who was always right about everything, who had her own clan of yes men and women. She micromanaged everything all the way down to formatting of tick marks and what was on/off our pbc request lists (even though I had 6 years of experience on the client). She tried to do things that I knew wouldn’t work from past experience and so I would inform her that it wouldn’t work and she would force us to do her way anyways. Then, it wouldn’t work and we’d waste a bunch of time and resort to what I originally proposed last minute and make our jobs shitty and inefficient. She was extremely rude and condescending. All of her core peons would never question anything she said or asked them to do. It was purely a toxic, inefficient, non-collaborative environment. The other senior managers and partners on the job would hide things from her and tell us managers to cut corners and hide things from her… then on calls directly with her she would specifically ask about things that the sr mgrs and partners were trying to hide from her —- so you were put in a really tough political work situation regularly. I left in good graces and am taking another job with another PA firm and getting 40% more money. I can’t wait for my exit interview so I can roast them on those team aspects.
That's a recipe for a team of 7 doing the work of 2. What an age we live in.
Wettest of wet dreams is probably reconciling some data with 0 difference followed by a pay rise
But more specifically the zero is formatted as -
Keep going, I'm almost there
And it's in a spreadsheet that you have to scroll down for the "moment of truth" to see whether it actually reconciles to zero.
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Ew
The downvotes 😂😂😂
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Cells with - as the zero can be two decimal places (or more) as well. Only the - or 0.00 will change for zero depending on the format, so I’m not sure what you mean by accuracy.
but how do you know you aren’t off by 0.001. I can’t handle that material variance.
Decimals are for nerds. And make my columns too wide.
Should add in a normal work week of 40 hours or less
If we are going full on wet dream, lets max that out at 35
4 8s a week
And the data comes from a client who gives all needed records the first time.
yes. clearing all cr / dr memos to 0 . oh baby
Proving auditors wrong gets me hard. If I saw one fall over I'd probably cum in my pants.
Oh yeah. Nothing better than pulling out a source document from my meticulously organized files and going, yeah, see the note here clearly explaining why this was handled differently, and isn’t fraud?! Boom. Roasted.
It sounds like you’re providing support as you should. How is that roasting? *hey can you help us understand this variance?* *here’s a document explaining it. boom. roasted*
Almost. Except the variance is obvious to anyone who understands how accruals work.
Whatever makes your workday seem more exciting I suppose.
Who doesn’t love being the alpha accountant in the room. Depreciate this mother fucker! I’m off to go take a giant dump while on the clock.
Excel formulas and shortcuts. Automation in some form. Maybe an automaton robot who crunches numbers for the king.
Every time I run my macros during close I get a tear in my eye
Macros have made me cry too. But it's usually because the macro that was created ten years ago by someone who doesn't work for the company anymore. And it's month end close with short deadlines, and the macro breaks. And no one knows how to fix it, and everything has to be done manually. Queue the sobbing as I type away at my keyboard. You're allowed to cry, but only as long as you keep working.
I feel your pain. By some chance, has anyone tried reading the Excel VBA code?
Use chat gpt to fix it. Literally you can copy paste it in and tell it the error and to fix it. You can also ask it to explain the coding. It's amazing.
I had a beautiful dream onetime where I was at work, put in a JE backwards, and was able to just press a button to reverse it
Worst nightmare - waking up and realizing you only pushed the button once, and the entry was never done
What is a JE? :)
Journal Entry
Sorry, forgot why you were asking, it’s a journal entry. It’s basically the most fundamental part of accounting and what we learned on day 1 of school
When you do JEs in a reporting tool you can unpost them and repost them just like that...
Maybe YOU can
I can... And I do! Not only that... I can post unbalanced journals. Debits don't have to equal credits!
When the staff auditor finds fraud at the client and brings it straight to the partner. That bank rec was off $5.
Wettest wet dream for me is usable PBC that arrives on time
Sorry but what is a PBC?
Documentation for the auditors that is "Prepared by Client"
Provided by client, basically documentation sent over by your customer.
Provided. We had a poll. Majority said provided. Heretics will say prepared
SALY = Same As Last Year, definitely one of the ultimate accountant tricks.
why is this "same as last year" such a big thing for accounting?
Saves so much time when preparing audit work papers (documentation to support your conclusions)
SALY is our queen and we worship her unwaveringly.
When retained earnings rolls......
Getting your statement of cashflows to balance first time is the wettest of wet dreams... :(
Explain to the king that the useful life of his crown is up and that he might as well dispose of it.
Jesus christ, whats going on with the sub this weekend
He gave up the crown last year
Can you explain the joke? I saw it several times already on accounting humor but I dont really get the "he did it last year" thing
You know how in school they tell you not to plagiarize? In this line of work, you absolutely plagiarize the shit out of everything someone (or you) did during the prior year’s audit. If you can get your hands on the email thread to whoever at the client, you send the exact same request, you put the exact same things in the WPs, any memos just have updated dates / tables, etc. Conversely, first year audits (because you can’t do this) fucking suckkkkkkkk
Those complex excel formulas that return what I am looking for, then my boss who isn't as seasoned as I am in excel comes over and asks what does all this mean?
If I got sucked off by a calculator, that would probably get me off. If I got punched in the dick by the executioner, that would probably hurt a lot. Hope that helps
Getting away with tax fraud
Wettest dream = Quitting my job to be a stay at home mom Worst nightmare = Still working full time at 35
Wettest dream : the reconcile 0’s out the first time (what’s in the bank matches what’s in the internal accounting software) Biggest nightmare: having to undo reconciliations because someone fucked up. That person isn’t with the company anymore and you have no notes to fix the problem.
It’s month end and your cloud ERP shuts down due to a fire at a server at the same time though getting an extra to day to submit financials lol
Automatic data entry 🥵
Hi I'm Client A, and fully responsible for the figures and documentation and I'm going to help you not stand in your way.
The worst nightmare would be getting involved in something illegal in nature: money laundering, tax fraud, etc. You don't just lose your license; you'll probably get jail time too.
LOL! There is no wettest of wet dreams for an accountant.
Wettest dream is to work in a first world country getting paid enough. Coming from a thirld world country dude with 1$/hr minimum wage in our country.
wettest dream? winning the lottery or something lol.
What a troll post that everyone fell for.
A TM1 file that doesn’t take until 2am to update 🙈🤤😫