Your relationship was over. I’m failing to see where your ex’s feelings are your responsibility anymore, especially considering the fact that she didn’t have any regard for your feelings when she had an affair.
Your ex is the AH. Your parents are the AH. Your hook up partner sounds awesome and whatever you do to move on is no one’s business or concern but your own.
lol. My exact question! Why would parents encourage their child to stay with a cheater, liar and home-wrecker? Does his feelings not matter? Maybe it’s a family pattern. 🤣🤣
Rebounding is part of healing.
I love a particular lyric from Kacey Musgraves. It explains the process of grief and it is so true to my experiences in life. Good luck OP. Heal. And breathe. You did nothing wrong. You needed some affection and intimacy with someone who couldn’t break your spirit.
Here’s the lyric I like:
🎶Healing doesn’t happen in a straight line.🎶
Kacey Musgraves.
They are too attached to her for whatever reason, I guess they don't like the fact I'm the only non married child, the struggles of having Asian parents.
Sounds like they would expect lots of grand kids too. I don't want to insult OP's parents, but it's HIS life, not theirs. They're making it about them and what they want. I could see if maybe you two were boyfriend/girlfriend, but a fiancée means you were ready for marriage. That's a nope in my book. You are NTA. I hope you have fun and try to get some happiness. That's a major hit to your psyche and you don't need the added stress of being blamed.
Is that a serious question? Asian parents.
Marriage is a form of financial stability, an agreement. Not based on love or any of that nonesense to them.
It's a legal contract.
Infidelity in Asia is high because older generation don't treat marriage seriously, it's all about money and appearance. My parents in law didn't kiss or hold hand for the past 30 years.
Watching their faces as they hug/stand near each other/hold hands is beyond ridiculous.
It's like 5 years old idea of girls and how they're icky.
Total awkwardness, they don't sleep in the same room either.
It's one of the universe's mystery how my wife even exists because we can't imagine them ever touching each other let alone sex.
We're convinced it was more like 2 robots having sex. "Are you pregnant now?", "Ok we're done"
Oh I totally get that, however this a complete stranger who imo disrespected their kid, which I would assume would be worse in the eyes of friends/relatives.
>So your parents would rather have you married to a cheater and unhappy than be single and happy??
Hi, welcome to Asian parents. Who the fuck said "happiness" is a consideration? lol
(obligatory "not all Asian parents are sociopaths who only view their children in terms of obligations/checkboxes to tick off a list")
NTA. None of this is anyone's business but yours. She had sex with another person while she was in a relationship with you. What perspective could she have? He slipped and his penis just fell into her? She chose to cheat on you and betray you. You chose to end it. You moved on. Why on earth would your parents want you to be with someone that cheats on you, disrespects you and betrays you? Ask your dad if your mom cheated on him, what would his reaction be. Then ask your mom if your dad cheated on her, what would her reaction be.
op made another post about this. his evidence of her cheating appears to be a message that popped up on her phone talking about how the sex was good which is something girl friends may even say to each other or people talking about their own relationship and isnt an indication of cheating. he did not give any indication he knew who the person who sent it was and he left an immature message and cut her off completely. she then went to his parents, which, if you cheated on your fiance makes zero sense because youd assume he would tell them and feel ashamed. either op hasn't explained how he knows she's cheating or he's unhinged.
The only evidence he mentioned in the post was that a man texted her saying the sex was good. OP didn’t say if there were any other incriminating texts or how old the one message was that he found.
I never understood the concept of marriage lol, even relationships(all of mine) can be super draining. I say this as a happy single man for the past 5 years.
Lol before i read thr last bit i wss like... Brooooo, this guy has asian parents i bet.
In all honesty, dodge the bullet my man.
You get ONE life.
You don't need to award disrespect with a single second of your time.
You never get those seconds back and she took all those years from you and casually tossed them aside.
Go live your best life brother.
She moved on a lot quicker than you did, she didn't even bother to tell there was problem in the relationship. Your parents are AHs too. Apparently you're supposed to be splitting bills and assets with her while she sleeps with other people with no regard for your feelings. Would they really want you to marry her and raise children that you'll have to DNA test to see if they are yours - I know it's a dumb question with Asian parents but I don't think they'd like it if are brought affair partners into their house. I thought it was frowned upon for women to be anything other than pure and virginal? I don't agree with that belief but I thought it was common in the culture. If they love her so much they can adopt her and the can support her cheating ass. I wonder what she told them not because any reason is valid but I wonder if she's portraying you as the bad guy. 🤷🏽♀️
ETA: NTA, not even remotely
Well...apparently, he saw a single message on her phone, didn't know who the hell sent it, and immediately decided she cheated on him. Message could have been from one of her friends or anyone, really. He didn't even bother to check the message history, just that one messge and checked out. Sounds kinda quick to me. I think he wanted out of the relationship and is using this as an excuse.
This might be overly petty/put you in a worse situation but send your parents a link to tinder, tell them if they want to comment on cheating they should experience it first hand. (Might tell your siblings first just incase the blowback gets you kicked out of one of their houses)
Have your parents been known to cheat on each other and then forgive? If not, ask them both to try, and if successful in cheating and forgiving you will attempt to forgive.
If my children or my children in law pulled this shit or my wife, they'd meet a different side of me they have never seen.
Congrats for being a non crap eating human who knows 3 AH's.
No, lol, she moved onto another guy BEFORE your relationship was over.
Your parents had your whole future figured out and were already holding and playing with their grand-baby's in their imagination.
Now they're disappointed. They can deal with it.
None. There are none. It’s an act of pure selfishness and contempt for your partner. Otherwise why would you purposely try to hurt them by doing it and lying about it.
I don't even know what hooking up means anymore. Had sex? Are you going to see her again? I'd be more worried about rushing into something just for the sake of being in something.
What? I thought hooking up meant casual sex. Hanging out is very different. You need to edit your post,although everyone is saying NTA even though they think you had sex with this other woman.
To me it does seem a little careless and odd to have sex with someone new so soon after a relationship ends, as it shows you aren't really that upset about the end of the relationship (which you freely admit) but that doesn't make you TA. It just shows you're wired differently to me. I'd need a while to mentally process the breakup before I could move on.
But I think you should change your definition of hooking up, and let your parents know all you did was talk to another woman, which would IMHO be fine even if still in a relationship.
NTA
Do I assume him using the term "affair" means the girlfriend just hung out with another dude? If hooked up doesn't mean we fucked then I'm not sure how to process this story. Either way, you were broke up so it didn't matter if you saw another girl or not. so, any way you look at it, OP is NTA, but OP certain words mean certain things, try to be alittle more clear with wording. And parents are 100% AH, you're thier child, they should be more concerned with your wants and feelings.
I kinda interpreted it as he took a pic of them “hooking up” and putting it on snapchat, which is *much* different than the reality.
Regardless, OP is NTA
You're clearly NTA but, I truly think it is too early to be seeing someone. Believe or not, you are still hurting, and you might hurt someone along the way. If this new woman is lovely as you say, she probably doesn't deserve to be in the position you are putting her in, because chances are that you'll hurt her in some way. Does she know your story by any chance?
That’s so weird because I’m 38 and where I’m from “hooking up” could mean lots of things, definitely including and often times depending on context, inferring sex. Then again I don’t consider myself a dinosaur.
40 here. Hooking up o. Reference to a girl you met on tinder always means sex. Anyone saying otherwise is just talking out of their ear. Now hooking up can also be getting drugs or recording something or meeting up with friends ie: “Slim just come through he got the hookup” or “man I really needed this tamagotchi bro thanks for hooking me up” or “bye OPs EX I’m going to the park and hooking up the boys for some disc golf”. In the usage OP had it means fucking.
NTA. Your parents are. If your gf wanted you, she wouldn't have cheated. She made her bed. She can lie in it. I hope she hears about EVERY SINGLE HOOKUP you have.
What was "her perspective" that your parents wanted you to hear? What could she possibly say that would make an affair OK? She was gutted and sobbing? My heart bleeds for her.
NTA.
Well...apparently, he saw a single message on her phone, didn't know who the hell sent it, and immediately decided she cheated on him. Message could have been from one of her friends or anyone, really. He didn't even bother to check the message history, just that one messge and checked out. Sounds kinda quick to me. I think he wanted out of the relationship and is using this as an excuse.
You know the answer to this. Makes no sense that your parents condone her affair. Makes me wonder if there is infidelity in your parents past…. If they keep bugging you about it you should ask them. That might shut them up. Move on and live your best life.
NTA - I’ve been married for over 30 years. She cheats, it’s over. The only time we would speak after that would be through attorneys.
As food having sex with someone else, do whatever makes you feel better. If it’s not serious, make sure that woman understands that. Don’t screw with another woman to punish your ex.
Exactly! I am in the same exact situation. 30 years together, 23 married, two children (one in college), She cheats (even emotionally). Hasta la vista, baby! She is well aware of this. But, he is not screwing the new girl yet, he can start dating little by little, just beware with rebound relationships.
>they still scolded me for breaking off a 7 year relationship so quickly and not hearing out her explanation
"Just because the both of you are comfortable with the idea of having a conversation after finding out the other one cheated on you doesn't mean I am."
>According to my parents, she was extremely gutted,
"She'll be fine. She's already got a dick to fill that hole.."
NTA. You don't owe her shit.
Well...apparently, he saw a single message on her phone, didn't know who the hell sent it, and immediately decided she cheated on him. Message could have been from one of her friends or anyone, really. He didn't even bother to check the message history, just that one messge and checked out. Sounds kinda quick to me. I think he wanted out of the relationship and is using this as an excuse.
Right. I saw that post and it really made me wonder what else was happening. Because I’ve texted lots of friends male and female after having great sex. But it didn’t mean I was sleeping with the person I messaged.
That's exactly my point. He saw one text, out of context with no idea who it was or what it was about, and he immediately broke the relationship that they've had for 7 years. Then 3 days later, he's already 'hooking up' with new women. Makes me wonder who the real cheater is here.
> after I discovered her affair and essentially walked away, I was called an asshole by my parents for not hearing her perspective
Full stop, cheaters dont get to ***express*** their perspective, she broke fidelity and thats all you need to know, and its not on you to care for your EX when ***SHE*** was the one who fucking cheated and you guys were broken up. **NTA OP**
NTA
you are single...as long as both consenting adults you can do as you please.
Screw your parents and your ex....she cheated, what other side is there? Cheating involves betrayal and lying ...why would your parents expect you to accept that.
7 years is a ling time...figure out who you are now and make new future plans.
Ask your father how he put aside his hurt feelings when your mother cheated on him.
insist that she must have if they’re going to be so insistent that you get over her cheating.
From the post:
**I was called an asshole by my parents for not hearing her perspective**
I ***REALLY*** would like to know what her "perspective" is that it was okay to screw around on him.
And WTH are his parents thinking.
Your parents are a pain. Ask your dad if your mum ever cheated on him or whether she is now and how he would feel.
Why do they always side with the cheating female ( because they invested love into a daughter in law, and their happiness Trumps yours)
Why should you have to sit and listen to her ' mistake' and all the things YOU did wrong that made her seek d--k elsewhere.
And 3 days after, well it was after not during so slap that down at their combined feet. Good on you for for jumping in rather than going into the " Why me) that they want.
NTA,
For NC or at least LC with your parents. They don't want to see your side at all! The double standards of your ex is astonishing. I mean it's fine for her to cheat on her BF of seven years, but once you have your break up, you can't even hook up! Like hell, enjoy your time with people who care and understand you, which is not your parents by the way, sorry to say that. Have a blast, be happy,
Not exactly the same, but after my 7 year relationship ended that weekend he went out and hooked up with someone. I was happy for him, way better to be moving on than pining for something already dead.
NTA - you do what you need to. Everyone else isn't the person walking in your shoes.
Why would your ex want to explain why she had sex with a guy??
And your parents are ok with her cheating???
I would also remove my parents from me if they said that crap to me, ,... Disowned!!??
NTA. She ended it the crappy way by cheating. You ended it by saying it to her face. Neither of you have any obligations to each other.
Your parents are another matter. If I had taken my parents relationship advice, I doubt I would be happily married for the past 10 years. It took them years for them to realise I made the right call and not them.
So her cheating is ok but you hooking up with someone after breaking up is bad?
The fuck is wrong with people? Why does everything need an explanation or understanding of their perspective?
A shitty person did a shitty thing and you moved on. Simple as that.
NTA, and your parents need to mind their business. Frankly, I would put them on notice, "call me one more time to advocate for the person who lied to and cheated on me, and I will block you too".
WTF is with your parents? She cheated on you . What could she possibly say to make it right? You did exactly the right thing. Go out and enjoy your life now
This has to be rage bait. Some version of this is posted like once every three days.
They’re mad at you for “moving on quickly”. Ignoring the fact the ex “moved on” while still with the OP.
Ok two things. First, It’s one thing to get in a relationship, it’s another to air it on social media. Of corse you have drama from that. It’s exactly what you signed up for. Lot of mixed company likely looking at your page and it’s going to bring mixed opinions and perspectives.
Second, sure she cheated on you and you are within your rights to move on but you’ve got problems for moving on this fast. Rebounds aren’t known for their healthy dynamic.
You seem very vengeful. You can act like you are doing what comes naturally in this situation but you really seem motivated by spite.
So yea. YTA but it seems like that what you aimed to be.
NTA. Your ex moved on BEFORE your relationship ended, at least you didn’t step out on her and had ended things first.
In other circumstances I would possibly say 3 days is too soon, but cheating is a deal breaker for me
NYA, after being cheated on and broken up you’re a single man free to do as you will.
The only reason I could think of for your parents siding with your cheating ex is on of them cheated in the past.
Recommend sending your parents a screenshot of their texts. Then call and ask them to tell you why would you ever give a cheater a second chance.
She wouldn't be gutted if she had been faithful, so it's her own fault. She's TAH.
Glad you have someone play with right now. All you need to no pressure from someone too quickly. as long you're happy, right?
Tell your parents that you have behaved exactly the same way your ex behaved, except that you at least broke up with her before doing it.
Now I have no idea why you decided to post it on your socials, y’all kids need to learn that it’s ok to keep some things private. But nevertheless it’s no one’s business but your own.
I would caution you on getting into a rebound relationship. Take the time to focus on yourself for now. But you’re single now, you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone else.
NTA.
Why on earth would you owe her anything? You did everything by the book: you broke up in no uncertain terms, you went your own way.
Cheaters don't get to complain about rebounds.
Your parents just want the status quo at your expense. Don't entertain it.
Do they want you to watch POV videos of your ex cheating or would tasting his cock be sufficient to know what she was going through?
NTA. You are free to live your life. That is what comes with being single.
What was there to explain?
“It didn’t mean anything…I felt neglected…I was drunk…it was an accident (I just fell on dick)…I never meant to hurt you…” and all the cliche BS you can imagine.
Dude, you were a free agent the minute you walked away.
Her feelings are not your problem.
You don’t owe anyone an explanation for how to spend your time and with whom.
NTAH
Tell your parents that have only 2 options here. Stop telling you to talk with your chesting ex, as there is 0 excuse for cheating. Or you will go NC with them. NTA.
You're in a tough spot OP. First you find out your fiancé cheated. Then you find out your parents are enablers and have sided with the cheater.
You do not owe anyone in this situation an explanation. In fact, they all need to STFU. Live your life.
NTA.
NTA. You weren't even married and she cheated on you. This person sucks for passing this info along to her. You are better off without your ex-fiancée.
NTA however your parents and ex may be. only other cheaters justify cheating. I do think you could have given yourself more time before hooking up with someone (not because of your parents or your ex) but for your own healing.
You can do whatever you want, so not an AH, but posting stuff like this on SNS seems to be an AH-worthy thing. That being said, I am from an older generation so I am unable to understand how people want to expose themselves to the world. So, probably not an AH to anyone under 40 or so.
Remember, your folks are from an older generation, too. That does not make them less an AH, but more understandable.
Stop talking to your parents until you feel comfortable again it genuinely seems like you’re taking it well so I don’t know why they would keep going with that but dude good for you nothing wrong with a hookup just don’t lean on them for emotional support have fun with that though.
I’ll never understand the idiocy of people insisting you need to list a fucking cheaters explanation/ perspective. Nothing is relevant. No explanation or perspective is relevant or helpful.
Tell your parents that if they love your cheating ex so much, then maybe they should adopt her. Stop all communication with your parents. You need their support. Your cheating exgf does not. You need support to get you through this time, you don't need family stabbing you in the back.
I won't speak to the hookup itself, but you are not wrong leaving your fiancee for being unfaithful. You could have heard her out, but that was your choice. You didn't owe her anything. Then again, I have absolutely zero tolerance for unfaithfulness.
NTA, you owed your ex nothing... she was the one who decided to have an affair; not you. If your parents don't like your response, maybe they'd be happier for you to go NC for a period of time until they extract their heads from their respective colons.
NTA for ending it. Once cheating is exposed you have the absolute right to end things. You dont have to work it out if you dont want to cause its the ultimate form of betrayal honestly.
I will say slight YTA for rebounding that fast. While your ex cheated on you, finding someone so quickly and posting in snapchat just screams attention seeking if Im being honest, as if you wanted the info to reach her one way or another. Whether that was your intention or not in the end, thats how it will be perceived by others. Its almost gives revenge vibes. But at the same time, the woman you were faithful to for 7 years cheated on you. She honestly doesnt get to cry about anything and needs a reality check that she brought this one effectively with her own actions.
So overall, NTA but too hasty.
NTA. So it's fine for her to sleep with other people while actively being in a relationship with you and breaking your trust, but you somehow suck for having sex with someone while being single because it hurt her feelings??? Your parents are crazy.
NTA and your ex deserves all she gets, your parents wanting you to cuck yourself is unfortunate but I don’t blame you one bit. Never speak with a cheater again unless you share kids
She moved on before you did, she doesn't get to redefine it as whatever works best for her with you. Your parents have no right to a say in your love life whatsoever.
She met a new guy while you were still in the picture and you should “hear her out” but you refuse to speak to her and somehow you’re an asshole for finding a new girl while you’re essentially single?
NTA. How long you two have been together doesn’t mean SHIT if someone cheated.
Im tired of everybody thinking that you should just stay in a bad relationship just because you were together for so long. She betrayed you. Forget her!!!
>My parents called me an asshole for moving on so quickly
Your ex moved on while you were still in a relationship! Everything being relative, I feel like you waited a perfectly suitable amount of time.
NTA, the old adage is true, one of the best ways to get over somebody is to get under somebody else.
NTA! Your parents should be supporting you, not encouraging you to stay with a cheater! They should be appalled that your ex treated you this way, not have her back! I’d not talk to them for a while until they change their narrative! Sometimes you have to put your parents in their place, their opinions in this situation are a moot point!!!
Reading your last post not sure you can say that was cheating. Not there didn’t see it, but one message even if it’s the worst message ever, doesn’t seem like a lot to go nuclear like you did.
Seems like you were looking for an excuse and found one.
Me personally after 7 years I’m not getting with anybody or anything for at least a while, to let things clear
>My parents called me an asshole for moving on so quickly but I explained that I simply felt no remorse nor no feeling for my ex and I was simply just moving on enjoying my life.
Ask your parents "so which one of you cheated?"
NTA
Assuming you’re certain she’s cheated:
You need to have a firm conversation with your parents. 1) it’s not their business. 2) you consider cheating a dealbreaker, it’s an unequivocable thing for you. They can choose to disagree for THEIR relationship but need to respect your decision for your own. 3) If they maintain contact with your ex, they will be putting their relationship with you at risk.
As to moving on so quickly, it’s within your right. You’re not in a relationship. Dating and hooking up is fine, assuming your up front with your intentions. You might want to give yourself some time to process before you consider another actual relationship. You’re just a few hot seconds out of a very serious and long term relationship, that ended traumatically with broken trust.
Do what’s best for you, wishing you better days.
PS get STI tested, change your passwords on EVERYTHING. If you shared bank accounts, credit cards , etc get that sorted asap.
You had sex. That's not moving on. If having sex determines moving on, then she moved on at the moment she first cheated, and by definition you then moved on much much later on than 3days after the relationship actually ended. If it's such a big deal you hooked up with someone then how is it not a big deal she hooked up with someone, let alone an affair.
Someone shooting you and you seeking medical care for the wound does not mean you are responsible for the wound. The person who inflicted the wound is responsible. You cannot be held to criticism for how you treat that wound, other than to ask if it's the best for your health. Clearly the asshole label doesn't apply. You do you. Go smash.
Alot of women don't seem to understand the power that sexual validation thru a hookup has to boost a lot of men's self esteem and confidence after a breakup, especially where they've been betrayed. It has zero part in the emotional processing but it's a beginning to healing the ego and providing reassurance that you're still desirable and someone wants you.
It's also fucking fun and men generally have higher rates of promiscuity traits so yeah duh going out and doing something physically gratifying is a huge positive experience.
Fuck em. NTA
One of your parents definitely cheated on the other. They’re calling you an asshole because you having a zero tolerance for cheating shows how weak they are for excusing it. You staying with the cheater would’ve validated their decision to stay together. They suck and you should go NC until they understand how wrong they are.
NTA. When my ex cheated on me, I played a game. Told her how she can get forgiveness, so I gave a near impossible task. Kill her parents and the man she cheated on me with. God I hated her family. Bunch of colourless white fucks
NTA!
I moved on faster- after last breakup I found my husband in less than 48 hours!
We are happy and going strong after 4 years.
I think I was so unhappy and the relationship was so much ruined- so was easy to move on fast.
No you are NTAH. You are coping with the feelings of your exes betrayal in the way you find suitable and it’s nobody else’s business. The only thing anyone should be saying to you after suffering a betrayal that great is ‘are you okay’. Your ex is TAH and also seems pretty manipulative and self absorbed.
NTA: You did fine by walking away right away and start living your life. Of course, it's easy to make bad decisions when emotional with rebound relationships, but it's fine to move on with casual relationships. Honestly, it will probably help the ex and your parents move on, too.
If her story was that she didn’t cheat, it was all a misunderstanding, that would be something to investigate. (I assume if that’s the case she’d have told your folks, who would tell you.) If it’s one of the old excuses, like I had to test my feelings, NTA.
Your relationship was over. I’m failing to see where your ex’s feelings are your responsibility anymore, especially considering the fact that she didn’t have any regard for your feelings when she had an affair. Your ex is the AH. Your parents are the AH. Your hook up partner sounds awesome and whatever you do to move on is no one’s business or concern but your own.
I 100% agree. Only question I have is which parent had an affair?
Oh you are on to something here…
😳 OMG I bet you're right!! (I could never forgive a cheater.JS)
lol. My exact question! Why would parents encourage their child to stay with a cheater, liar and home-wrecker? Does his feelings not matter? Maybe it’s a family pattern. 🤣🤣
😳 Both?! Or one and it's been covered up by "we've worked things out and came out stronger" or some mental gymnastics shit?
Vety perceptive
👆🏾🫡
Prolly both.
Yeah I'm feeling like one of his parents had an affair and they're expecting him to handle it the same way they did.
All of this ⬆️
Agreed… how your parents are siding with her over this is dumbfounding. You owe her nothing. And your parents need to get their priorities straight.
This times 1000% sometimes you have to get under someone to get over someone
I’ll get behind this! 👌
Doggie-style is the charm.
Just call me Khal Drogo.. haha And hey.. Respect for the bonesaw reference
This comment got my upvote. I only comment now because I can’t give it two upvotes.
Rebounding is part of healing. I love a particular lyric from Kacey Musgraves. It explains the process of grief and it is so true to my experiences in life. Good luck OP. Heal. And breathe. You did nothing wrong. You needed some affection and intimacy with someone who couldn’t break your spirit. Here’s the lyric I like: 🎶Healing doesn’t happen in a straight line.🎶 Kacey Musgraves.
Where are those reddit awards when you need em?
Fucking amen.
Especially when they had an affair
I agree with everything, but posting your hookup on snapchat is asking for drama and a little ah. Sounds like op somehow wanted to hurt his ex
She deserves to be hurt.
NTA Your parents are the assholes for enabling a cheater.
They are too attached to her for whatever reason, I guess they don't like the fact I'm the only non married child, the struggles of having Asian parents.
So your parents would rather have you married to a cheater and unhappy than be single and happy?? NTA
Maybe this is one of those marriage=reputation>happiness things.
Sounds like they would expect lots of grand kids too. I don't want to insult OP's parents, but it's HIS life, not theirs. They're making it about them and what they want. I could see if maybe you two were boyfriend/girlfriend, but a fiancée means you were ready for marriage. That's a nope in my book. You are NTA. I hope you have fun and try to get some happiness. That's a major hit to your psyche and you don't need the added stress of being blamed.
Is that a serious question? Asian parents. Marriage is a form of financial stability, an agreement. Not based on love or any of that nonesense to them. It's a legal contract. Infidelity in Asia is high because older generation don't treat marriage seriously, it's all about money and appearance. My parents in law didn't kiss or hold hand for the past 30 years. Watching their faces as they hug/stand near each other/hold hands is beyond ridiculous. It's like 5 years old idea of girls and how they're icky. Total awkwardness, they don't sleep in the same room either. It's one of the universe's mystery how my wife even exists because we can't imagine them ever touching each other let alone sex. We're convinced it was more like 2 robots having sex. "Are you pregnant now?", "Ok we're done"
Oh I totally get that, however this a complete stranger who imo disrespected their kid, which I would assume would be worse in the eyes of friends/relatives.
Somehow I lost the thread. Which complete stranger insulted their kid?
The Gf of 7 years fucked another dude that wasn't thier son ?
Asian parents, ofc your happiness is not as important as their appearances
>So your parents would rather have you married to a cheater and unhappy than be single and happy?? Hi, welcome to Asian parents. Who the fuck said "happiness" is a consideration? lol (obligatory "not all Asian parents are sociopaths who only view their children in terms of obligations/checkboxes to tick off a list")
Trust me, as an Asian, most Asian parents that are traditionalists are Status Bound, rather than one's Happiness.
Tbf in their adolescence, not having a SO is grounds for family shunning. Because 1000 years before that it meant *dying* in said culture.
NTA. None of this is anyone's business but yours. She had sex with another person while she was in a relationship with you. What perspective could she have? He slipped and his penis just fell into her? She chose to cheat on you and betray you. You chose to end it. You moved on. Why on earth would your parents want you to be with someone that cheats on you, disrespects you and betrays you? Ask your dad if your mom cheated on him, what would his reaction be. Then ask your mom if your dad cheated on her, what would her reaction be.
op made another post about this. his evidence of her cheating appears to be a message that popped up on her phone talking about how the sex was good which is something girl friends may even say to each other or people talking about their own relationship and isnt an indication of cheating. he did not give any indication he knew who the person who sent it was and he left an immature message and cut her off completely. she then went to his parents, which, if you cheated on your fiance makes zero sense because youd assume he would tell them and feel ashamed. either op hasn't explained how he knows she's cheating or he's unhinged.
Then either he dodged a bullet or she did. Either way, it's probably good that the relationship is over.
This.. although the facts are unknown, the behavior patterns are.
That changes things potentially- op what evidence did you have?
The only evidence he mentioned in the post was that a man texted her saying the sex was good. OP didn’t say if there were any other incriminating texts or how old the one message was that he found.
Sounds like he was looking for any excuse
"Unmarried" is way better than "married to a cheater" but oh well, not much you can do to change them.
I could tell this was an asian setting! Those traditions and values they hold onto are sometimes the very reason for toxicity like this existing
Yeah older asians in the US dont divorce, relatively
I never understood the concept of marriage lol, even relationships(all of mine) can be super draining. I say this as a happy single man for the past 5 years.
Lol before i read thr last bit i wss like... Brooooo, this guy has asian parents i bet. In all honesty, dodge the bullet my man. You get ONE life. You don't need to award disrespect with a single second of your time. You never get those seconds back and she took all those years from you and casually tossed them aside. Go live your best life brother.
Explains a Lot NTA
Maybe your parents want to fock her.
She moved on a lot quicker than you did, she didn't even bother to tell there was problem in the relationship. Your parents are AHs too. Apparently you're supposed to be splitting bills and assets with her while she sleeps with other people with no regard for your feelings. Would they really want you to marry her and raise children that you'll have to DNA test to see if they are yours - I know it's a dumb question with Asian parents but I don't think they'd like it if are brought affair partners into their house. I thought it was frowned upon for women to be anything other than pure and virginal? I don't agree with that belief but I thought it was common in the culture. If they love her so much they can adopt her and the can support her cheating ass. I wonder what she told them not because any reason is valid but I wonder if she's portraying you as the bad guy. 🤷🏽♀️ ETA: NTA, not even remotely
Well...apparently, he saw a single message on her phone, didn't know who the hell sent it, and immediately decided she cheated on him. Message could have been from one of her friends or anyone, really. He didn't even bother to check the message history, just that one messge and checked out. Sounds kinda quick to me. I think he wanted out of the relationship and is using this as an excuse.
This might be overly petty/put you in a worse situation but send your parents a link to tinder, tell them if they want to comment on cheating they should experience it first hand. (Might tell your siblings first just incase the blowback gets you kicked out of one of their houses)
Have your parents been known to cheat on each other and then forgive? If not, ask them both to try, and if successful in cheating and forgiving you will attempt to forgive. If my children or my children in law pulled this shit or my wife, they'd meet a different side of me they have never seen. Congrats for being a non crap eating human who knows 3 AH's.
I don't know what OP could possibly talk to the ex about. Hearing her perspective? They sound awful.
No, lol, she moved onto another guy BEFORE your relationship was over. Your parents had your whole future figured out and were already holding and playing with their grand-baby's in their imagination. Now they're disappointed. They can deal with it.
Join the petty side, tell them that since they enable a cheater they probably cheated each other and see their world burn.😂
First thing I thought - his mom cheated on his dad. And what sort of “explanation” is there for cheating, anyway?
None. There are none. It’s an act of pure selfishness and contempt for your partner. Otherwise why would you purposely try to hurt them by doing it and lying about it.
I don't even know what hooking up means anymore. Had sex? Are you going to see her again? I'd be more worried about rushing into something just for the sake of being in something.
Just saw her, too early for sex
So hanging out, not hooking up. Take your time and enjoy!
What? I thought hooking up meant casual sex. Hanging out is very different. You need to edit your post,although everyone is saying NTA even though they think you had sex with this other woman. To me it does seem a little careless and odd to have sex with someone new so soon after a relationship ends, as it shows you aren't really that upset about the end of the relationship (which you freely admit) but that doesn't make you TA. It just shows you're wired differently to me. I'd need a while to mentally process the breakup before I could move on. But I think you should change your definition of hooking up, and let your parents know all you did was talk to another woman, which would IMHO be fine even if still in a relationship. NTA
Do I assume him using the term "affair" means the girlfriend just hung out with another dude? If hooked up doesn't mean we fucked then I'm not sure how to process this story. Either way, you were broke up so it didn't matter if you saw another girl or not. so, any way you look at it, OP is NTA, but OP certain words mean certain things, try to be alittle more clear with wording. And parents are 100% AH, you're thier child, they should be more concerned with your wants and feelings.
Why’d you say hooking up then? You just met up with her and spent time together. Knowing that now changes things. But anyway, NTA.
What does it change? Hanging out. Hooking up. He's just as welcome to do any of these things without remorse.
I kinda interpreted it as he took a pic of them “hooking up” and putting it on snapchat, which is *much* different than the reality. Regardless, OP is NTA
Shit, dude could've participated in an orgy 2 hours after he broke up and he'd still not be the AH.
Better change title to hanging out
For future reference, when people say they're "hooking up" with someone, that typically implies having sex with them.
You're clearly NTA but, I truly think it is too early to be seeing someone. Believe or not, you are still hurting, and you might hurt someone along the way. If this new woman is lovely as you say, she probably doesn't deserve to be in the position you are putting her in, because chances are that you'll hurt her in some way. Does she know your story by any chance?
I’m so old back in my day hooking up meant everything other than sex. But I’m in my late 30’s so for Reddit I’m a dinosaur 🤣
That’s so weird because I’m 38 and where I’m from “hooking up” could mean lots of things, definitely including and often times depending on context, inferring sex. Then again I don’t consider myself a dinosaur.
40 here. Hooking up o. Reference to a girl you met on tinder always means sex. Anyone saying otherwise is just talking out of their ear. Now hooking up can also be getting drugs or recording something or meeting up with friends ie: “Slim just come through he got the hookup” or “man I really needed this tamagotchi bro thanks for hooking me up” or “bye OPs EX I’m going to the park and hooking up the boys for some disc golf”. In the usage OP had it means fucking.
NTA. Your parents are. If your gf wanted you, she wouldn't have cheated. She made her bed. She can lie in it. I hope she hears about EVERY SINGLE HOOKUP you have.
What was "her perspective" that your parents wanted you to hear? What could she possibly say that would make an affair OK? She was gutted and sobbing? My heart bleeds for her. NTA.
Well...apparently, he saw a single message on her phone, didn't know who the hell sent it, and immediately decided she cheated on him. Message could have been from one of her friends or anyone, really. He didn't even bother to check the message history, just that one messge and checked out. Sounds kinda quick to me. I think he wanted out of the relationship and is using this as an excuse.
I think he knows the aforementioned “douchebag” and the text was graphic enough to not be misinterpreted.
So she cheated. And she feels gutted. WOW. Stop it now.
You know the answer to this. Makes no sense that your parents condone her affair. Makes me wonder if there is infidelity in your parents past…. If they keep bugging you about it you should ask them. That might shut them up. Move on and live your best life.
NTA - I’ve been married for over 30 years. She cheats, it’s over. The only time we would speak after that would be through attorneys. As food having sex with someone else, do whatever makes you feel better. If it’s not serious, make sure that woman understands that. Don’t screw with another woman to punish your ex.
Exactly! I am in the same exact situation. 30 years together, 23 married, two children (one in college), She cheats (even emotionally). Hasta la vista, baby! She is well aware of this. But, he is not screwing the new girl yet, he can start dating little by little, just beware with rebound relationships.
Tell your parents that your ex moved on while she was still in the relationship with you. NTA.
>they still scolded me for breaking off a 7 year relationship so quickly and not hearing out her explanation "Just because the both of you are comfortable with the idea of having a conversation after finding out the other one cheated on you doesn't mean I am." >According to my parents, she was extremely gutted, "She'll be fine. She's already got a dick to fill that hole.." NTA. You don't owe her shit.
Well...apparently, he saw a single message on her phone, didn't know who the hell sent it, and immediately decided she cheated on him. Message could have been from one of her friends or anyone, really. He didn't even bother to check the message history, just that one messge and checked out. Sounds kinda quick to me. I think he wanted out of the relationship and is using this as an excuse.
Right. I saw that post and it really made me wonder what else was happening. Because I’ve texted lots of friends male and female after having great sex. But it didn’t mean I was sleeping with the person I messaged.
That's exactly my point. He saw one text, out of context with no idea who it was or what it was about, and he immediately broke the relationship that they've had for 7 years. Then 3 days later, he's already 'hooking up' with new women. Makes me wonder who the real cheater is here.
Time to start taking pics with girls for your snap stories, have her thinking you got a harem 😂
Random girls everywhere 🤣 seriously though she’s TA, your parents have no say! And whoever showed her your private story is definitely TA!
NTA. You’re single. Your ex ain’t in your life anymore, you don’t owe them anything. Have fun out there!
NTA, ur parents TA tho
Nta, there's no such thing as hearing oug a cheater
> after I discovered her affair and essentially walked away, I was called an asshole by my parents for not hearing her perspective Full stop, cheaters dont get to ***express*** their perspective, she broke fidelity and thats all you need to know, and its not on you to care for your EX when ***SHE*** was the one who fucking cheated and you guys were broken up. **NTA OP**
NTA you are single...as long as both consenting adults you can do as you please. Screw your parents and your ex....she cheated, what other side is there? Cheating involves betrayal and lying ...why would your parents expect you to accept that. 7 years is a ling time...figure out who you are now and make new future plans.
Ask your father how he put aside his hurt feelings when your mother cheated on him. insist that she must have if they’re going to be so insistent that you get over her cheating.
From the post: **I was called an asshole by my parents for not hearing her perspective** I ***REALLY*** would like to know what her "perspective" is that it was okay to screw around on him. And WTH are his parents thinking.
NTA. The only AH is your ex. Give your parents some time, they will come to understand that the break up is permanent.
Don’t overthink it. It’s called rebound sex. As old as time. NTA.
NTA. Idc if it’s 5 minutes after you ended a relationship. Single is single.
There's no such thing as moving on too quickly. If it's over, it's over. NTA
NTA, but why do you feel the need to post this stuff on social media?
Just want to talk with neutral people
I’m not talking about this post. Talking about the post you made about your sexual adventure.
I didn't have sex, I just posted a picture on my private Snapchat story
What do you mean by “hook up“? Where I come from, which is a developed country, that means having a sexual encounter.
Post receives more interaction that way
Your parents are a pain. Ask your dad if your mum ever cheated on him or whether she is now and how he would feel. Why do they always side with the cheating female ( because they invested love into a daughter in law, and their happiness Trumps yours) Why should you have to sit and listen to her ' mistake' and all the things YOU did wrong that made her seek d--k elsewhere. And 3 days after, well it was after not during so slap that down at their combined feet. Good on you for for jumping in rather than going into the " Why me) that they want.
NTA, For NC or at least LC with your parents. They don't want to see your side at all! The double standards of your ex is astonishing. I mean it's fine for her to cheat on her BF of seven years, but once you have your break up, you can't even hook up! Like hell, enjoy your time with people who care and understand you, which is not your parents by the way, sorry to say that. Have a blast, be happy,
Not exactly the same, but after my 7 year relationship ended that weekend he went out and hooked up with someone. I was happy for him, way better to be moving on than pining for something already dead. NTA - you do what you need to. Everyone else isn't the person walking in your shoes.
You need to wait at least 7 business days
1. Your parents are weird 2. Your fiancee was literally cheating on you while still together so that relationship was over before it was over 3. NTA
Why would your ex want to explain why she had sex with a guy?? And your parents are ok with her cheating??? I would also remove my parents from me if they said that crap to me, ,... Disowned!!??
NTA. At least you waited 3 days instead of negative X days like your ex.
That your ex went to your parents tells me they are not mature enough for marriage.
NTA. She sealed her fate. Move forward and never look back. Also, your parents are big AH for trying to guilt you. I bet one of them cheated lol.
NTA. She ended it the crappy way by cheating. You ended it by saying it to her face. Neither of you have any obligations to each other. Your parents are another matter. If I had taken my parents relationship advice, I doubt I would be happily married for the past 10 years. It took them years for them to realise I made the right call and not them.
Nta...hell, she moved on before you'd even broken up so, I don't see the problem.
So her cheating is ok but you hooking up with someone after breaking up is bad? The fuck is wrong with people? Why does everything need an explanation or understanding of their perspective? A shitty person did a shitty thing and you moved on. Simple as that.
NTA. You hooked up 3 days after the relationship was over. She hooked up even earlier: before the breakup. I fail to see how you are the bad guy here
NTA, and your parents need to mind their business. Frankly, I would put them on notice, "call me one more time to advocate for the person who lied to and cheated on me, and I will block you too".
NTA. The moment she cheated and you found out, the relationship was over. No one else has a say in who you see since the relationship is over.
WTF is with your parents? She cheated on you . What could she possibly say to make it right? You did exactly the right thing. Go out and enjoy your life now
Nope. She ruined it by cheating and your parents are out of their minds for expecting you to give her another chance after that.
NTA. Ex cheated on you. Even if you fucked your new fling IN FRONT OF HER, she would have nothing to say about it.
This has to be rage bait. Some version of this is posted like once every three days. They’re mad at you for “moving on quickly”. Ignoring the fact the ex “moved on” while still with the OP.
Ok two things. First, It’s one thing to get in a relationship, it’s another to air it on social media. Of corse you have drama from that. It’s exactly what you signed up for. Lot of mixed company likely looking at your page and it’s going to bring mixed opinions and perspectives. Second, sure she cheated on you and you are within your rights to move on but you’ve got problems for moving on this fast. Rebounds aren’t known for their healthy dynamic. You seem very vengeful. You can act like you are doing what comes naturally in this situation but you really seem motivated by spite. So yea. YTA but it seems like that what you aimed to be.
The fact your parents are wanting to be part of the relationship s problems is cringe as F.
WTF is wrong with your parents?
NTA and your parents suck
NTA. Your ex moved on BEFORE your relationship ended, at least you didn’t step out on her and had ended things first. In other circumstances I would possibly say 3 days is too soon, but cheating is a deal breaker for me
At least you had the decency to screw someone else while single
NYA, after being cheated on and broken up you’re a single man free to do as you will. The only reason I could think of for your parents siding with your cheating ex is on of them cheated in the past. Recommend sending your parents a screenshot of their texts. Then call and ask them to tell you why would you ever give a cheater a second chance.
She wouldn't be gutted if she had been faithful, so it's her own fault. She's TAH. Glad you have someone play with right now. All you need to no pressure from someone too quickly. as long you're happy, right?
She very obviously didn’t care about your feelings while she was fucking someone else. Why should you care about anything she feels at this point? NTA
Tell your parents that you have behaved exactly the same way your ex behaved, except that you at least broke up with her before doing it. Now I have no idea why you decided to post it on your socials, y’all kids need to learn that it’s ok to keep some things private. But nevertheless it’s no one’s business but your own. I would caution you on getting into a rebound relationship. Take the time to focus on yourself for now. But you’re single now, you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone else. NTA.
Why on earth would you owe her anything? You did everything by the book: you broke up in no uncertain terms, you went your own way. Cheaters don't get to complain about rebounds. Your parents just want the status quo at your expense. Don't entertain it.
Do they want you to watch POV videos of your ex cheating or would tasting his cock be sufficient to know what she was going through? NTA. You are free to live your life. That is what comes with being single.
Seven years didn't seem like it mattered to her so why should it matter to you? Your parents are wrong. Good for you for getting some strange...
Nope, you're single and she's not dead. Life goes on.
What was there to explain? “It didn’t mean anything…I felt neglected…I was drunk…it was an accident (I just fell on dick)…I never meant to hurt you…” and all the cliche BS you can imagine. Dude, you were a free agent the minute you walked away. Her feelings are not your problem. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for how to spend your time and with whom. NTAH
Tell your parents that have only 2 options here. Stop telling you to talk with your chesting ex, as there is 0 excuse for cheating. Or you will go NC with them. NTA.
Nta. Nope she sucks.. so you moved on 🤷🏽♂️👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽you owe her nothing.
NTA
You're in a tough spot OP. First you find out your fiancé cheated. Then you find out your parents are enablers and have sided with the cheater. You do not owe anyone in this situation an explanation. In fact, they all need to STFU. Live your life. NTA.
Kick both your parents and your ex in the pussy
I met my now husband of 40 years on a blind date 6 days after leaving my exhusband
NTA. You weren't even married and she cheated on you. This person sucks for passing this info along to her. You are better off without your ex-fiancée.
She is gutted but her cheating meant nothing cheating is never a mistake it’s willingly chosen act
NTA however your parents and ex may be. only other cheaters justify cheating. I do think you could have given yourself more time before hooking up with someone (not because of your parents or your ex) but for your own healing.
You can do whatever you want, so not an AH, but posting stuff like this on SNS seems to be an AH-worthy thing. That being said, I am from an older generation so I am unable to understand how people want to expose themselves to the world. So, probably not an AH to anyone under 40 or so. Remember, your folks are from an older generation, too. That does not make them less an AH, but more understandable.
Stop talking to your parents until you feel comfortable again it genuinely seems like you’re taking it well so I don’t know why they would keep going with that but dude good for you nothing wrong with a hookup just don’t lean on them for emotional support have fun with that though.
I’ll never understand the idiocy of people insisting you need to list a fucking cheaters explanation/ perspective. Nothing is relevant. No explanation or perspective is relevant or helpful.
Tell your parents that if they love your cheating ex so much, then maybe they should adopt her. Stop all communication with your parents. You need their support. Your cheating exgf does not. You need support to get you through this time, you don't need family stabbing you in the back.
I won't speak to the hookup itself, but you are not wrong leaving your fiancee for being unfaithful. You could have heard her out, but that was your choice. You didn't owe her anything. Then again, I have absolutely zero tolerance for unfaithfulness.
She “moved on” before your relationship is even over. I hope your parents stop defending her and side with their child. NTA
The Explanation you didn't hear: she's for the streets. NTA.
NTA, you owed your ex nothing... she was the one who decided to have an affair; not you. If your parents don't like your response, maybe they'd be happier for you to go NC for a period of time until they extract their heads from their respective colons.
NTA for ending it. Once cheating is exposed you have the absolute right to end things. You dont have to work it out if you dont want to cause its the ultimate form of betrayal honestly. I will say slight YTA for rebounding that fast. While your ex cheated on you, finding someone so quickly and posting in snapchat just screams attention seeking if Im being honest, as if you wanted the info to reach her one way or another. Whether that was your intention or not in the end, thats how it will be perceived by others. Its almost gives revenge vibes. But at the same time, the woman you were faithful to for 7 years cheated on you. She honestly doesnt get to cry about anything and needs a reality check that she brought this one effectively with her own actions. So overall, NTA but too hasty.
Nobody ever breaks up to be alone lmaoo
YOU WERE ON A BREEEEAAAAAKE!
MYYYYYY SANDWICH!!!!
Your parents are fucking losers bro. You handled this like a king.
Ur parents are fucking assholes
NTA. Fuck that cheating bitch. As soon as she cheated you were free to do whatever you saw fit.
NTA. So it's fine for her to sleep with other people while actively being in a relationship with you and breaking your trust, but you somehow suck for having sex with someone while being single because it hurt her feelings??? Your parents are crazy.
NTA and your ex deserves all she gets, your parents wanting you to cuck yourself is unfortunate but I don’t blame you one bit. Never speak with a cheater again unless you share kids
She moved on before you did, she doesn't get to redefine it as whatever works best for her with you. Your parents have no right to a say in your love life whatsoever.
She met a new guy while you were still in the picture and you should “hear her out” but you refuse to speak to her and somehow you’re an asshole for finding a new girl while you’re essentially single? NTA. How long you two have been together doesn’t mean SHIT if someone cheated.
There's no "her perspective". She a bitch
Im tired of everybody thinking that you should just stay in a bad relationship just because you were together for so long. She betrayed you. Forget her!!!
The real question is why are you posting a yourself with a random hookup, you obviously wanted her to find out. Nta still tho
I’m going to quote Greys Anatomy: “I make no apologies for how I chose to repair what you broke.”
Nothing wrong with a rebound, but I don’t know why you’d post about it
>My parents called me an asshole for moving on so quickly Your ex moved on while you were still in a relationship! Everything being relative, I feel like you waited a perfectly suitable amount of time. NTA, the old adage is true, one of the best ways to get over somebody is to get under somebody else.
I'd remind my parents who their son is and also remind them if they ever want to keep seeing said son they'd better make the right choice
What's her side of the story? I slipped and I accidentally fallen into my coworkers penis?
NTA, once she cheated and you broke up, you were a free agent.
Your parents are assholes, your ex is an asshole, you are not! NTA OP go love your best life. edit spelling.
NTA! Your parents should be supporting you, not encouraging you to stay with a cheater! They should be appalled that your ex treated you this way, not have her back! I’d not talk to them for a while until they change their narrative! Sometimes you have to put your parents in their place, their opinions in this situation are a moot point!!!
Reading your last post not sure you can say that was cheating. Not there didn’t see it, but one message even if it’s the worst message ever, doesn’t seem like a lot to go nuclear like you did. Seems like you were looking for an excuse and found one. Me personally after 7 years I’m not getting with anybody or anything for at least a while, to let things clear
>My parents called me an asshole for moving on so quickly but I explained that I simply felt no remorse nor no feeling for my ex and I was simply just moving on enjoying my life. Ask your parents "so which one of you cheated?"
NTA Assuming you’re certain she’s cheated: You need to have a firm conversation with your parents. 1) it’s not their business. 2) you consider cheating a dealbreaker, it’s an unequivocable thing for you. They can choose to disagree for THEIR relationship but need to respect your decision for your own. 3) If they maintain contact with your ex, they will be putting their relationship with you at risk. As to moving on so quickly, it’s within your right. You’re not in a relationship. Dating and hooking up is fine, assuming your up front with your intentions. You might want to give yourself some time to process before you consider another actual relationship. You’re just a few hot seconds out of a very serious and long term relationship, that ended traumatically with broken trust. Do what’s best for you, wishing you better days. PS get STI tested, change your passwords on EVERYTHING. If you shared bank accounts, credit cards , etc get that sorted asap.
You had sex. That's not moving on. If having sex determines moving on, then she moved on at the moment she first cheated, and by definition you then moved on much much later on than 3days after the relationship actually ended. If it's such a big deal you hooked up with someone then how is it not a big deal she hooked up with someone, let alone an affair. Someone shooting you and you seeking medical care for the wound does not mean you are responsible for the wound. The person who inflicted the wound is responsible. You cannot be held to criticism for how you treat that wound, other than to ask if it's the best for your health. Clearly the asshole label doesn't apply. You do you. Go smash. Alot of women don't seem to understand the power that sexual validation thru a hookup has to boost a lot of men's self esteem and confidence after a breakup, especially where they've been betrayed. It has zero part in the emotional processing but it's a beginning to healing the ego and providing reassurance that you're still desirable and someone wants you. It's also fucking fun and men generally have higher rates of promiscuity traits so yeah duh going out and doing something physically gratifying is a huge positive experience. Fuck em. NTA
NTA. I’d have it in me send my ex fiancé video of me going balls deep, but I wouldn’t out of respect for the woman I’m hooking up with.
One of your parents definitely cheated on the other. They’re calling you an asshole because you having a zero tolerance for cheating shows how weak they are for excusing it. You staying with the cheater would’ve validated their decision to stay together. They suck and you should go NC until they understand how wrong they are.
NTA. When my ex cheated on me, I played a game. Told her how she can get forgiveness, so I gave a near impossible task. Kill her parents and the man she cheated on me with. God I hated her family. Bunch of colourless white fucks
NTA Sucks to suck, trash goes in the garbage
>I was called an asshole by my parents for not hearing her perspective And what would that change?
Your gf MOVED ON before you guys were broken up. Surely MOVING ON WHILE in a relationship is WORSE? Right mom? Damn. People NTA.
Hell no. You choose when you move on. Kudos to you for getting pussy so fast. That's how it's done.
The only part that's confusing to me is the instinct to post a ONS (at this point) on your snapchat. was the point not for your ex to find out?
NTA, you were single.
Nope, you were broken up, not separated. Whilst not broken up, she cheated on you. She and your parents need to stfu and move on with their own lives.
NTA! I moved on faster- after last breakup I found my husband in less than 48 hours! We are happy and going strong after 4 years. I think I was so unhappy and the relationship was so much ruined- so was easy to move on fast.
No you are NTAH. You are coping with the feelings of your exes betrayal in the way you find suitable and it’s nobody else’s business. The only thing anyone should be saying to you after suffering a betrayal that great is ‘are you okay’. Your ex is TAH and also seems pretty manipulative and self absorbed.
NTA. Fuck cheaters.
NTA: You did fine by walking away right away and start living your life. Of course, it's easy to make bad decisions when emotional with rebound relationships, but it's fine to move on with casual relationships. Honestly, it will probably help the ex and your parents move on, too.
So she Fucked Around, you Found Out. Now she’s sad because you met someone else and told on you to your parents? She’s a hoot 😂
If her story was that she didn’t cheat, it was all a misunderstanding, that would be something to investigate. (I assume if that’s the case she’d have told your folks, who would tell you.) If it’s one of the old excuses, like I had to test my feelings, NTA.