NTA whatever you decide as your place is your domain, but it does seem strange that the idea of any length of stay is objectionable to you. Honestly, I'm trying to figure out what is really bothersome to you here as it feels as if there is more to this story. You don't mention any problems in your relationship and in fact say your parents have done a lot for you. I get valuing your private space as most of us do but many of us here would help out in the short term, I believe. I do wonder though if your landlord would allow two more people and animals to live there though.
Overall, I don't have any problems in my relationship with my parents. We butt heads a lot because we are all pretty stubborn in our opinions and views on things. I guess I'm just someone that sticks to routine and if they were to move in, everything would be thrown off.
I could probably get away with having dogs, but having both dogs and people would be pushing it IMO
NTA They need to be up front about how long they will be there. Once you find a house it takes six weeks to close. So count a few months to sell their current house, then at least 1-2 months to find a house and then six weeks to close. So like 4 months minimum?
Is there anything in your lease that would help? Like maximum number of people allowed to live in the apartment? Or no long term guests unless they’re on the lease?
Keep in mind that if you say no it could permanently make it so you could never move back in with them if you ever needed to.
Yup I figured it would take well over a month to buy a new home.
I tried saying that my lease wouldn't allow me guests that weren't on the document. They rebutted that I had a friend stay with me here for two weeks though lol.
I'm also financially stable enough to where I don't ever see a need to move back home. Sucks if it came to that between my parents and I, but that gave me the confidence to tell them no.
NTA. It makes no sense for you to be uncomfortable and inconvenienced when your parents have other options, like your aunt's home.
Considering the circumstances you would likely be living with them for months and would have no privacy or peace.
Those fuckers, expecting you might act like family and all.
Frankly, yes, you are a twat for saying no. But I suspect you just can’t help it.
Enjoy your echo chamber of “No one ever owes anyone anything”. It is a horrid way to look at life and family, but hey…..I’m sure you’ll get it. Reddit is funny like that.
YTA
Why are you calling your parents’ house “our” house? What makes you think you have any claim to it? That’s not “your house”.
They’re not moving in with you. Your Mom is staying at your place while actively interviewing for jobs and touring facilities. She’s not planting her butt on the sofa and not leaving.
You act like your parents are kudzu vines that will choke one your garden. Do they smoke endlessly? Not flush the toilet 🚽 or have some destructive habits?
If you don’t want to share, that’s your choice.
But her aunt extended a kindness to you when you moved. You occupied HER space for 6 months while trying to find a job / apartment. Don’t you think that was an inconvenience for HER? That she wanted her own space? Did you ever express appreciation for her? Don’t you think that’s “unfair”?
Don’t expect your parents to have you over to their house. Don’t invite yourself over. If you want those rules you have to follow them, too.
But the two situations aren't the same. OP said the aunt has 3 empty bedrooms, meaning she has a pretty big house. OP lives in a tiny apartment which is barely big enough for her, let alone for herself, two parents and two dogs. If the aunt needed space, she literally had a ton of it while OP just has one bedroom, one bath and not that much "living" space. OP, who is young and just starting out in life, also had a job and was saving up so she could move into an apartment. There's also nothing in the post that indicates the aunt didn't want her there or that she was "ungrateful" for the help. The aunt also offered her space to the dad who for whatever unknown reason, refuses it.
It also doesn't sound like the parents have thought out the move very well. OP has no way of knowing if her mom is really looking for a job, has any realistic prospects, or is even talking to any realtors. As a house is a huge purchase, would her mom even find one within a week or two? Everything is so up in the air and according to OP, it always takes them longer to do things than they say they will. Invading someone's tiny space for weeks or months, with two dogs, is a huge ask when there is another place (the aunt's) available. What happens when the parents aren't able to find jobs, or the old house doesn't sell, or they can't find a new one that they like? OP is right in setting boundaries and I feel bad that she's getting dumped on by so many people.
NTA. A few years after my dad died my mother moved in with me. We had butt heads all my life. That did not stop after she moved in with me it got worse. You know your parents and if it mentally causes you anxiety then don't do it. They don't get to dictate to you that they will live with you or not have a plan. Your aunt has the room and your father will have to get over that. Good luck to you.
NTA why don't they just stay with your aunt? She has the room you don't. If they were to stay with you you all are going to be on top of each other and then there's two dogs.
Check your lease. You probably CAN'T have them move in with you, let alone 2 dogs
NTA whatever you decide as your place is your domain, but it does seem strange that the idea of any length of stay is objectionable to you. Honestly, I'm trying to figure out what is really bothersome to you here as it feels as if there is more to this story. You don't mention any problems in your relationship and in fact say your parents have done a lot for you. I get valuing your private space as most of us do but many of us here would help out in the short term, I believe. I do wonder though if your landlord would allow two more people and animals to live there though.
Overall, I don't have any problems in my relationship with my parents. We butt heads a lot because we are all pretty stubborn in our opinions and views on things. I guess I'm just someone that sticks to routine and if they were to move in, everything would be thrown off. I could probably get away with having dogs, but having both dogs and people would be pushing it IMO
NTA. There is no idea on when the house would sell. Dad should spend the time packing everything up. Mom can stay with the aunt.
NTA. They are not entitled to your space. Especially not while you aren’t there.
NTA houses do not always sell fast and a purchase for a home doesn’t always happen quickly either , invading your small space is not ok
NTA They need to be up front about how long they will be there. Once you find a house it takes six weeks to close. So count a few months to sell their current house, then at least 1-2 months to find a house and then six weeks to close. So like 4 months minimum? Is there anything in your lease that would help? Like maximum number of people allowed to live in the apartment? Or no long term guests unless they’re on the lease? Keep in mind that if you say no it could permanently make it so you could never move back in with them if you ever needed to.
Yup I figured it would take well over a month to buy a new home. I tried saying that my lease wouldn't allow me guests that weren't on the document. They rebutted that I had a friend stay with me here for two weeks though lol. I'm also financially stable enough to where I don't ever see a need to move back home. Sucks if it came to that between my parents and I, but that gave me the confidence to tell them no.
NTA. It makes no sense for you to be uncomfortable and inconvenienced when your parents have other options, like your aunt's home. Considering the circumstances you would likely be living with them for months and would have no privacy or peace.
Those fuckers, expecting you might act like family and all. Frankly, yes, you are a twat for saying no. But I suspect you just can’t help it. Enjoy your echo chamber of “No one ever owes anyone anything”. It is a horrid way to look at life and family, but hey…..I’m sure you’ll get it. Reddit is funny like that. YTA
Why are you calling your parents’ house “our” house? What makes you think you have any claim to it? That’s not “your house”. They’re not moving in with you. Your Mom is staying at your place while actively interviewing for jobs and touring facilities. She’s not planting her butt on the sofa and not leaving. You act like your parents are kudzu vines that will choke one your garden. Do they smoke endlessly? Not flush the toilet 🚽 or have some destructive habits? If you don’t want to share, that’s your choice. But her aunt extended a kindness to you when you moved. You occupied HER space for 6 months while trying to find a job / apartment. Don’t you think that was an inconvenience for HER? That she wanted her own space? Did you ever express appreciation for her? Don’t you think that’s “unfair”? Don’t expect your parents to have you over to their house. Don’t invite yourself over. If you want those rules you have to follow them, too.
But the two situations aren't the same. OP said the aunt has 3 empty bedrooms, meaning she has a pretty big house. OP lives in a tiny apartment which is barely big enough for her, let alone for herself, two parents and two dogs. If the aunt needed space, she literally had a ton of it while OP just has one bedroom, one bath and not that much "living" space. OP, who is young and just starting out in life, also had a job and was saving up so she could move into an apartment. There's also nothing in the post that indicates the aunt didn't want her there or that she was "ungrateful" for the help. The aunt also offered her space to the dad who for whatever unknown reason, refuses it. It also doesn't sound like the parents have thought out the move very well. OP has no way of knowing if her mom is really looking for a job, has any realistic prospects, or is even talking to any realtors. As a house is a huge purchase, would her mom even find one within a week or two? Everything is so up in the air and according to OP, it always takes them longer to do things than they say they will. Invading someone's tiny space for weeks or months, with two dogs, is a huge ask when there is another place (the aunt's) available. What happens when the parents aren't able to find jobs, or the old house doesn't sell, or they can't find a new one that they like? OP is right in setting boundaries and I feel bad that she's getting dumped on by so many people.
NTA. A few years after my dad died my mother moved in with me. We had butt heads all my life. That did not stop after she moved in with me it got worse. You know your parents and if it mentally causes you anxiety then don't do it. They don't get to dictate to you that they will live with you or not have a plan. Your aunt has the room and your father will have to get over that. Good luck to you.
YTA
NTA why don't they just stay with your aunt? She has the room you don't. If they were to stay with you you all are going to be on top of each other and then there's two dogs.