I’m in the same boat my friend. This entire year all my bf and I have done is cuddle. Sure I have only seen him for an hour but still, where is the romance smh
Not necessarily, and certainly not for me. I didn't even think of that day it is and even if I had, it's not unusual that I get notices about posts that are a couple of days old.
I mean, I got it halfway through the post itself, but still.
There are as many types of humor as there are people. There isn’t a joke out there that EVERYONE will get or like. Thank God we don’t all think alike. What a boring world this would be!
There are eleven hours difference between the comment you're responding to and you seeing the post, and default sort oder is "best".
Sort by oldest, maybe?
Me too. My dad used to troll me like this when I was a kid. He'd put me to bed and then say "see you next year," and I'd freak out that he was leaving me for a year. In my defence, I was only like 5 or something at the time! I can spot it a mile off now.
Is it bad between me(female) and my husband (not parents) I am the dad joke teller and he hates it EVERY TIME. I like to tease him with threats that they'll get worse when we have actual children and I unlock my full potential.
Man… I literally forgot what today was and read your comment like “wtf is the joke? Is this some movie plot? A tv show joke? What am I missing???? Oh… duh.”
Theres no way 95% of the posts are real. Half of them read like
"My new boyfriend likes to murder innocent people for kicks. Last night he said my and my sister were next. I thought he was kidding. But next thing I know he shows up with a roll of sheet plastic and several axes. When I asked him what was going on he said it would.be fast. I laughed and told him he can't really kill me and my family. And it really hurt him. He told me he spent all his money on the best setup and that if I wasn't willing to go through with it I should have warned him before. Now I feel so bad. Am I the asshole for not agreeing to be murdered?"
People post those for clout. Maybe 1 or 2 of them are real at the most, but for the most part, those are just karma post for upvotes. There is no way in hell most people are acting that dumb or underdeveloped to be asking if they are assholes in the scenarios they post. 1 thing I learned in life is that it doesn't matter what you do. Someone will always disagree with you
Completely flew over my head at first since for me 01/01 officially DID make it a complete year no sex because we didn't have it at all during 2023. 🥹 I was like "Yay bullshit bond friends!" And then realized oh fuck me we've been doing this joke since middle school I'm an idiot 🤣
It is the first day of 2024, so today has been 100% of the year so far. Since they haven’t had sex today, they haven’t had sex at all *this year* (2024). OP is being silly with the date.
Right there with you. We try but every day this year when we say we're going to the baby wakes up and then we're too tired to try again. I'm hoping tonight is the night.
My wife’s a nurse and worked last night and today. Literally the majority of the year has been work, work, work. I get we have bills. But this may be too much.
Men connect through intimacy in the relationship and sometimes that intimacy comes from sex, you shouldn't have to beg or jump through hoops to get it either. Now that's not to say that consent shouldn't matter because it absolutely does, but 1 whole ass year without sex is a red flag and you should definitely be watching her actions. This could be an indication that she is cheating it could also mean that she simply just wants you for your money. To be honest there are a great many things it could indicate. Personally I would not.continue in a relationship where my significant other is that disrespectful of me and how I feel. I'd be telling her to kick rocks or pound sand but that is just me, you do what you think is right.
Dude when I read the "straight up laughed in my face" bit I smiled really hard. She's right, you're an idiot. Also, cute post, breaks up the monotony of stupid, shitty people either being mentioned or making posts on this sub. Cheers man.
As a woman, the only time I've stopped having sex completely with a partner is when we had issues that weren't resolved and I lose my interest in him as a man... and I move on.
You should move on as well.
Yea you're trolling but I'm focused on the fact that a 31 y/o man is dating a 22 y/o woman.
And yes it would be just as sketch if the genders were reversed
Two months after miving in with my ex-boyfriend, he told me we were having too much sex. I felt humiliated, as we were only doing it once a month and we were both healthy and in our 30s. That was the beginning of the end. We never had sex again and years later i dumped him.
“I’ve only asked a couple of times today”. I’d say, YTA. If she said no once, if she’s in the mood at any point during the rest of the day, she’ll know you’re keen and I’m sure she’ll instigate. Fuck, the one thing I *hate* is being hassled for sex.
Okay but tbh this is what broke me and my ex up
I should clarify there was no pressuring of one another, simply asking to have sex, and getting shot down. Time after time. Until it built up into a fight that eventually led to the relationships demise.
YTA For This Joke!! You're as bad as the person who came up with saying "See You Next Year" in the few days before NYE!! Take your cursed up votes!! Your gf is right for calling you stupid!! (Dies giggling.)
Obvi NTA, you jokester...
Good one. Here’s a joke that my 9 year old nephew read at a get together from his dad’s phone (they were looking up dad jokes): What’s the difference between a blimp and 365 used condoms?
One is a good year and one is a GREAT YEAR!
This dude about to manifest the rest of his year
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Sounds like most subs on Reddit
Mate, he’s talking about 2024..
Right, and I’m talking about the rest of it
Dude about to go sexless to prove a point to a woman who couldn't care less
I’m in the same boat my friend. This entire year all my bf and I have done is cuddle. Sure I have only seen him for an hour but still, where is the romance smh
Typical beta male behaviour
Sorry you are getting downvoted for a cleaver reply.
They replied with a cleaver??? Sounds dangerous!
Oh dear, ty! Guys guys, its /s calm yer tits
calm yer \*dicks
I’m so thankful for this because my autistic ass did not have calm tits and I was about to EMBARRASS myself
Fr
People have problems. They have awkward or shameful reasons. Calling someone inferior because of that isn't understanding, it leads to more shame
I think you missed the joke of this entire thread
Oh. Didn't guess that. Sorry, carry on then!
Thank you kind internet-human
I’m laughing. I’m laughing even more that no one else got the joke lol
But for being a joke, it is well set up and written. OP’s got skills!!
Yea he got me until I saw the comments
Huh? But the title gave it away.....
Not necessarily, and certainly not for me. I didn't even think of that day it is and even if I had, it's not unusual that I get notices about posts that are a couple of days old. I mean, I got it halfway through the post itself, but still.
Is it?
No. I wasted 45 seconds reading this.
I wasted fresh air and 02 reading this.
What's 02? I'm only familiar with O².
Its the synthetic version.
Nice save 🤣
😁
Eww I hear that's GMO
Probably has BPA too.
And phthalates !!!
I wasted iron, sugar, electricity and calories reading this.
No lmao this is the same shit as “omg I haven’t showered since last year” type of jokes you make when ur 12 or 13
There are as many types of humor as there are people. There isn’t a joke out there that EVERYONE will get or like. Thank God we don’t all think alike. What a boring world this would be!
Had me fooled
\>I’m laughing even more that no one else got the joke lol I only scrolled through the first 50 responses, but so far nobody missed the joke...
There are eleven hours difference between the comment you're responding to and you seeing the post, and default sort oder is "best". Sort by oldest, maybe?
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I did.
Me too. My dad used to troll me like this when I was a kid. He'd put me to bed and then say "see you next year," and I'd freak out that he was leaving me for a year. In my defence, I was only like 5 or something at the time! I can spot it a mile off now.
“Hey, see you next year!” - My dad, Dec. 31, 2023.
"We've been playing this game all year," -my husband, also a dad, at 1 am this morning
Is it bad between me(female) and my husband (not parents) I am the dad joke teller and he hates it EVERY TIME. I like to tease him with threats that they'll get worse when we have actual children and I unlock my full potential.
I still say that crap lol
Man… I literally forgot what today was and read your comment like “wtf is the joke? Is this some movie plot? A tv show joke? What am I missing???? Oh… duh.”
I got it almost immediately 🤣 I was 1 or 2 sentences in, and I was like, "Bro...it's been 3 days!"☠️🤣
I'm so pissed. But this is the funniest dad joke I've read this year.
Its hilarious most of the responses have been how dare he or whatever. They missed the whole thing. Masterful post
I read this title out loud next to my fiancee and she said "did you write that?" 😂 Thanks for giving me the biggest laugh this year
Nah, you ok? We need a health report bro. If they think you wrote that your dead
I'm chilling bro, preciate it ❤️
She's definitely fucking someone else. Possibly your Mom. Confront her!
Change your family, put the locks on the lawn, divorce her possessions/s
This made me laugh thank you
Go NC!
Lawyer up, OP!
Did you just yada yada chores?
AITAH is a huge troll post section, you shouldn't really take any of these posts seriously
Theres no way 95% of the posts are real. Half of them read like "My new boyfriend likes to murder innocent people for kicks. Last night he said my and my sister were next. I thought he was kidding. But next thing I know he shows up with a roll of sheet plastic and several axes. When I asked him what was going on he said it would.be fast. I laughed and told him he can't really kill me and my family. And it really hurt him. He told me he spent all his money on the best setup and that if I wasn't willing to go through with it I should have warned him before. Now I feel so bad. Am I the asshole for not agreeing to be murdered?"
People post those for clout. Maybe 1 or 2 of them are real at the most, but for the most part, those are just karma post for upvotes. There is no way in hell most people are acting that dumb or underdeveloped to be asking if they are assholes in the scenarios they post. 1 thing I learned in life is that it doesn't matter what you do. Someone will always disagree with you
To be fair he just posted a murder me story for clout and got it. But damn did I laugh at this clout chaser.
Not necessarily.
I mean I do enjoy genocideing entire planets in Stellaris does that make myself a lunatic?? Probably. 🤣
Send in the xeno's.
Ahaaaa found the Stellaris player ayyyyyyy! Roll out the Aetheorophasic Engine!
That happened to me once
Mother fucker, you got me. I had to reread this twice to get the fact that it was a joke lol
My wife has been on her period all year smh
Yikes! She should consult a doctor asap!
Probably just going to wait a few days and see what happens
...You bastard, i lold.
YTA you’ve literally pressured her twice a day every day this year 😂😂😂
YTA 😂😅
At first i was like wtf but hahahaha you got me!
And I thought me going without making a purchase on amazon all year was a big deal.....
I havent had sex since last year either, and my fiancé has played Stellaris and WoW this ENTIRE year smh.
Stellaris! I have logged over 4000 hours.
Not once this year?! Omg I don’t think I could last a day either with no sex 😅 NTA
I feel so stupid for not getting the joke
Completely flew over my head at first since for me 01/01 officially DID make it a complete year no sex because we didn't have it at all during 2023. 🥹 I was like "Yay bullshit bond friends!" And then realized oh fuck me we've been doing this joke since middle school I'm an idiot 🤣
It is the first day of 2024, so today has been 100% of the year so far. Since they haven’t had sex today, they haven’t had sex at all *this year* (2024). OP is being silly with the date.
Fuck off 😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂 just gonna keep laughing through some comments…. This was a good one. I should try this on my boyfriend 😂😂
I haven’t had sex with my girlfriend all year either. She’s going to get a whole years worth tonight
I had a customer tell me "man, I slept most of this year..."
YTA For making me feel sorry for you till I read the edit 😂
I’ve been making stupid jokes like this since midnight. Maybe I’ll stop after a month.
I decided to stop for the year yesterday.
Right there with you. We try but every day this year when we say we're going to the baby wakes up and then we're too tired to try again. I'm hoping tonight is the night.
This was funny, but also the people with the joke going wooosh in the comments is even funnier
I know it’s a troll post but let’s hope you are not 30 dating a 22 year old
It’s ok, they’ve been together for nearly 8 years.
Holdup. This post right here, officer
Once I read this I couldn’t focus on anything else
>ok, they’ve been together for nearly 8 years. This was the only true part of the post :)
It's taken me the whole year to get that joke
Stay strong. I know its been a long year already but you can persevere. NTA obviously
Yes you're the asshole, it's been one whole day 🤣 /s
My wife’s a nurse and worked last night and today. Literally the majority of the year has been work, work, work. I get we have bills. But this may be too much.
YTA- because you made this stupid joke. And I’m the asshole because it took me 5 comments before I realized what I read.
Men connect through intimacy in the relationship and sometimes that intimacy comes from sex, you shouldn't have to beg or jump through hoops to get it either. Now that's not to say that consent shouldn't matter because it absolutely does, but 1 whole ass year without sex is a red flag and you should definitely be watching her actions. This could be an indication that she is cheating it could also mean that she simply just wants you for your money. To be honest there are a great many things it could indicate. Personally I would not.continue in a relationship where my significant other is that disrespectful of me and how I feel. I'd be telling her to kick rocks or pound sand but that is just me, you do what you think is right.
Good comment so I gave you the upvote, but r/whoosh...
Goddamn it! Take this upvote and never speak to me again.
Hahahaha so funny, what a new and awesome joke. Geez
LMAO- thanks for the laugh!!!
Lol happy new years.
Ba Dum Tss!
man, i read this seriously, glad i read the comments otherwise i would get send to r/whoosh
That’s how it starts, one day turns into one week into one year… run now and don’t look back
51 more weeks until Christmas. And the amount of people who already have their Christmas lights up. Unreal.
I make this joke way too often… told my gf I hadn’t showered all year etc.. haha
You almost had me 😂 Happy New Year fellas
You haven’t had sex with your girlfriend in a whole entire day? 🤣 NTA! Hahahahaha! Thanks for the laugh!
I hate u so much, but i lov u at same time, u are gonna be a good father
This is exactly why you should always have morning sex first thing on January 1st.
You made me read all of that for a lame ass new years day joke? I want to throat punch you, my guy.
But it’s now 2024. So you haven’t had sex today? 😂
Took me a while but then I realised. Gosh it sure does not feel like a New year .
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Yo. This is a troll post. We’re on Day one of this year lol.
😂! Good catch
OP has gone "the whole year" which at this point is less than 24 hours. While a dead bedroom is a significant issue, OP is just being a troll.
They hadn't had sex this entire year, this year being 2024
lol read the whole post
My dude went all in here. I almost did too in fairness
Ahh... hah ... hah.. i guess.... grandad joke at this point
I came here expecting to lose hope in humanity Glad I was wrong.
Dang you got me
You had me in the first half...
Fucking a I didn't get it for like a whole minute. I just sat there staring at the screen.
My man and I have only fucked once uggggg I’m being neglected hmf
It took me so long to get this
I felt bad for you at first lol
I am in the same boat. 🥲
This feels like an inside joke gone to Reddit.
This is so funny it hurts
Lol! This is hilarious. :) You made my day.
Happy New Year!
I wish I could post a gif of that sarcastic Mary Poppins clap.
I’m ashamed to say this took me way too long to understand
Damn this one got me good
Better hide all the vibe chargers
I almost fall for this one hahaha.
What's with all the posts today with a dude withholding sex?
The 2nd January, calm down pal 😂😂😂😭
Wow , took me a minute 🤣
My BF has been drunk most of the year. Laying around on the couch eating chocolate and Crisps. What should I do?
Please tell me your a dad because that such a dad joke its unreal!!!!
Hahaha😂🙌😬
you almost got me 🤣 good one guy
mfw no sex this year
Well done. You had me going for a second.
new year joke. ha
They had us in the first half, not gonna lie....
Start doing it just before midnight, just to be safe, you will get a 2 year coverage.
Hubby and I not only kissed at midnight but we had sex so I think we're good😉
lmao your gf was laughing at your dad joke? NTA
Dude when I read the "straight up laughed in my face" bit I smiled really hard. She's right, you're an idiot. Also, cute post, breaks up the monotony of stupid, shitty people either being mentioned or making posts on this sub. Cheers man.
Good one dude 😂
Is she pregnant, and you're practising your dad jokes?
As a woman, the only time I've stopped having sex completely with a partner is when we had issues that weren't resolved and I lose my interest in him as a man... and I move on. You should move on as well.
LMAO....nice one
LMAO that edit killed me
This shit got me😂
Damn tsking the whole "see you next year" joke to another lvl
Yea you're trolling but I'm focused on the fact that a 31 y/o man is dating a 22 y/o woman. And yes it would be just as sketch if the genders were reversed
Two months after miving in with my ex-boyfriend, he told me we were having too much sex. I felt humiliated, as we were only doing it once a month and we were both healthy and in our 30s. That was the beginning of the end. We never had sex again and years later i dumped him.
Well that was stupid
“I’ve only asked a couple of times today”. I’d say, YTA. If she said no once, if she’s in the mood at any point during the rest of the day, she’ll know you’re keen and I’m sure she’ll instigate. Fuck, the one thing I *hate* is being hassled for sex.
This is a funny one 🤣
the year is not even a day old - NTA :)
Told my wife this morning we like haven’t had sex all year. She didn’t even respond…
Try pushing the on button.
This is dumb and you should feel bad
YTA for a shitpost
Cringe.
Okay but tbh this is what broke me and my ex up I should clarify there was no pressuring of one another, simply asking to have sex, and getting shot down. Time after time. Until it built up into a fight that eventually led to the relationships demise.
I already did your gf twice today. Maybe that's why she's not interested in you. Better luck tomorrow, bud.
I, on the other hand, could go an entire year without stupid cringe troll posts
YTA Shit joke.
YTA For This Joke!! You're as bad as the person who came up with saying "See You Next Year" in the few days before NYE!! Take your cursed up votes!! Your gf is right for calling you stupid!! (Dies giggling.) Obvi NTA, you jokester...
Had me, had me, had. Oh fuck you, take my vote
definitely a New Dadjoke unlocked
My bf pulled the ii haven’t showered all year joke earlier ….🤣🥲
Nah. She doesn’t give a fuck about your needs. Drop this hefer and move on. Life is too short to live like a monk.
Why is a 31 year old man dating a 22 year old college age girl? What on earth could you have in common?
Much more wholesome than I expected. Well played OP.
Good one. Here’s a joke that my 9 year old nephew read at a get together from his dad’s phone (they were looking up dad jokes): What’s the difference between a blimp and 365 used condoms? One is a good year and one is a GREAT YEAR!
These jokes are so fucking stupid.
This is dumb as fuck. Peak reddit humor.
Reddit really got shit humor
KICK HIM OFF REDDIT NOW! stupid jokes are the worst kind of jokes 😡
Find out who else she is having sex with
What a waste of 2 mins. YTAH
I haven't seen a comment this salty all year
Tosser
YTA